I hear you, and I'm so sorry you're going through this pain. It's incredibly tough, but remember you are not alone in this struggle. Keep holding on to hope.
As someone going through this, parental alienation most certainly is very real and more prolific than others realize, and can happen to both men and women. It's soul crushing when you do all you can to be a loving parent, yet you are treated like dirt by the system and all involved in it as if you are some kind of monster. For anyone going through this, please know that some of us understand and we hear you.
I've been living as targeted parent for 7+ years. After meeting with a court counselor and judge last week. As we were leaving the court room. My ex turned around and mouthed "good luck" meaning she's turned our boys against me. Good luck trying to reconnect with them. She's sick.
@@chadfeathers3001 Her remark sounds like one a narc would make. Though imo, there is no such thing as luck. I pray the word spell casted over your child(ren) by her be utterly and completely broken; and the truth revealed in Jesus name, amen.
Growing up, my mom would try to alienate me and my little sister from my dad (they divorced in the mid to late 2000s). I’d reject the things she’d try to tell me, which strained my relationship with her. It wasn’t until my dad died on August 2013 that my mom realized what she did to me was wrong. She died four months later. I still feel resentment about it to this day. Kids should NEVER have to have one guardian talk trash about the other one.
Hey, metal pipe and carrots. I am so sorry you went through this. You did not deserve to be put in the middle of their emotional problems like that. You deserved better. No matter what, I hope you can find some peace in your mother coming back and taking accountability for her actions. That is incredibly difficult for most people to do, especially when so much pain has been inflicted and they know they are the reason. I’m so glad you’re here, and I truly wish the best for you in your life. I hope you have found or do soon find your constants, and that unconditional love and support you were always worthy of receiving. God bless you. Much love, family.
It's heartbreaking to hear about the impact of parental alienation on your relationship with your dad. Hopefully, your experience can serve as a cautionary tale, pushing for awareness and change in how parents handle divorce and custody. The lasting effects of such actions can be profound.
It seems Parental Alienation seems impossible to believe until it happens to you. This is taking things to an extreme but this happens on a less drastic level frequently when Narcissism is involved!!
I know too many fathers experiencing this. I knew about Parental Alienation, but truly felt the effects of Parental Alienation when my ex-wife alienated my children from me. Aside from refusing to let me see them, she poisoned them against me and even made the oldest file a false complaints of abuse against me. This was the lowest point in my life, waking up one day and realizing your children hate you and you haven’t done anything to deserve it. Eventually my ex-wife’s own mother spoke on my behalf in family court because our oldest daughter told her grandmother, that my ex-wife made her make false complaints of abuse. I eventually received primary custody but it’s been an uphill battle with my kids. It’s like they’ve been brainwashed. Parents who engage in Parental Alienation should be prosecuted.
I am a woman and experience the same thing. In my case, actually my ex mother play big role in this, even bigger than him. She is like trying to be mother herself for my child.
I think one of the hardest things for targeted parents such as myself is believing that another parent would take such extreme measures to not just alienate you from your child’s life, but with the ultimate goal to eliminate you all together. According to Dr. Steven G. Miller, these cases are highly counterintuitive in which attorneys, judges, GAL‘s, forensics psychologist, therapist, and even court evaluators, get these cases completely backwards. They see alienation cases as they do any other high conflict custody case. The truth is that these cases are high conflict, however, with that said, there is a significant difference in these cases which separate them from just any other high conflict custody case. Yes, it is true that in an alienation case there is conflict, but the difference is you have one parent, who controls access to the child or children whether that is through taking away your parenting time, or blocking you from your child’s medical and educational records, or even being able to speak with them by phone, or requesting additional time with your child or children. The reason that I wanted to post this to the website is not for personal recognition, but to help other targeted parents, who do not know where to turn to for help. It is a very frustrating experience that leaves one confused, bewildered, and overwhelmed in trying to understand it. For me, it has been an 11 year journey in trying to find experts, who could help me to better understand what I was going through and how to prepare myself in being able to move forward. In 95% of these cases, you are dealing with an ex or parent, who is suffering from an undiagnosed “B“ personality disorder, whether that be borderline personality disorder, narcissistic personality disorder, a sociopath, or even a psychopath. If you are experiencing any of the above behaviors from your ex, or soon to be ex, you need to protect yourself and set boundaries, which will benefit you when it comes time to be heard in court. Be extremely careful in what you say around your child or children as the alienating parent will draw from any information that the children may take back with them after their time with you has ended. You also need to know that this type of parent is extremely deceptive and yet is undermining you every chance he or she has in order to annihilate you in the end. Every single thing that you shared with this person, who you thought truly cared about you was only recording information to use against you in court. As a targeted parent, it is essential to have a diary or log of everything that you or your child or children are experiencing in regard to the alienating parent. Please note the importance of the documentation, as this may be the only thing that you have that you can use against that parent in court. For one, they generally tend to be very charming, convincing, confident, and charismatic. They are also accomplished liars and will distort the truth and even make up lies and false allegations to substantiate their case against you. Even if it is something as simple as a missed call or being able to speak with your child due to frivolous excuses such as the other parent stating, “I just put them to bed or my phone was charging and I didn’t see the call.“ Write down every occurrence that takes place which includes, but not limited to text messages, emails, and phone conversations and the day and time to the very second it took place. There is one thing that holds true for every Alienating parent and that is they are predictable. Due to the fact that they tell so many lies, if you keep a very accurate account of what your ex states, they will eventually trip themselves up in their own lies and you will have a record of it. You almost have to set them up to present your case. Please, also note, that the reason to have a record of everything that is said and done, in regard to alienating you from your child, whether that is even changing a doctor’s appointment at the last minute so you cant be there; it must be recorded. Due to their use of coercive control, once you start recording everything that is taking place you will eventually see a pattern as to how they operate, which is going to give you an advantage in court. For example, my ex, before school would begin in the Fall, would start medicating our child with allergy medications and steroids, which prohibited him from using cognitive reasoning skills and heightened his aggressiveness. She would then have him tested by an out side behavioral psychologist, which reflected that our child was experiencing poor academic ability due to a “slow working memory” and having behavioral issues at school which mirrored ADHD. What my child was suffering from was toxic stress. My ex’s insidious plan was to have our child labeled mentally impaired, so that he would receive an IEP/504 Program for being a special needs child. When she knew that I was onto her and what she was doing, she had an Ex-Parte filed against me. Our child never had allergies and now she has graduated to giving him Psychotic Drugs by not even getting a diagnosis of ADHD, but based on an assessment she had done from the child’s pediatrician. In regard to having representation, most attorneys will tell you that they have experience in alienation cases, but don’t believe them, because it’s generally a lie. All they want is your money and they take advantage of the situation by having you to write down everything about your ex and what bothers you about them and what they are doing that is negatively impacting your child or children. Your ex’s attorney is doing the same, therefore, the two attorneys, although supposedly protecting “client privileged information,“ is sharing those concerns to fuel the situation in order to yield higher than expected litigation fees that never seem to identify the root cause of the underlying family dynamic that is causing you to be alienated from your child. Family Court Cases are sadly a business that brings in 50-80 Billion Dollars a year in revenue. Instead of spending tens of thousands of dollars in attorney fees, I am giving you advice based on my own personal experience. Once you have had a chance to document to the point of actually being able to see a pattern, which may take 6 to 12 to 18 months before you can actually see the pattern, it’s better to do that than to be where I am 11 years later. Take that information and find an expert that deals specifically with your type of case. That expert will then take the information that you have given them, which will probably be through their assistant and not directly to them, in which they will do an overview of the entire case and if enough evidence is there can testify on the child’s behalf as to what is happening, as most judges are not versed in these type of cases. For example, if your ex is using medical abuse, then you would need to find someone who specializes in factitious disorder imposed on another. I think one of the hardest things for targeted parents such as myself is believing that another parent would take such extreme measures to not just alienate you from your child’s life, but with the ultimate goal to eliminate you all together. I have taken the liberty to include resources, as that seems to be a disadvantage to targeted parents, who are clueless as to where to seek help. By the time you begin to figure all this out for yourself, unfortunately, your ex is so far ahead in the game, that there is no level playing field. I don’t want you to have to go through what I went through, therefore, hopefully this will give you a jump start that I did not have. If you have not raised children and this is your first child in which you are caught in this conflict, there are several resources in books that I would highly recommend in knowing how to effectively raise children. Two of those books are written by Dr. James Dobson, and those titles would be “Bringing up Boys,” and “Bringing up Girls.” The third book would be “123 Magic,” by Thomas W. Phelan. Hang in there, take care of yourself, and never worry about tomorrow, but focus on today and ask God to direct your steps as to what He wants you to do today and leave the results up to Him. My best to all of you in your quest. Vincent Kinsler Charlotte, NC
@Happy Dog Your response left for tragic reading. From every standpoint, you have done everything I know that a parent could possibly do, but yet it seems to never measure up. The hardest people to love is family. Don’t neglect yourself or your own care. Find your communities and invest your life where it brings back a sense of joy and self-worth to your life. Only you can make that decision as to when to stop giving so much of yourself, but give yourself time to grow and expand and invest in new relationships. Instead of waiting on life to begin by having your life dictated by someone else, start living life today with those people who will appreciate you for you. It starts by loving you and once you can do that, it is amazing what will follow! Vincent
@@jenniferpagone939 Jennifer, let me answer your question by first stating that it’s never too late. As a matter of fact, today can be the start of not only a new day, but a new future and a new beginning. Narcissist use three tactics in a relationship. 1. They idealize you. 2. They devalue you. 3. They discard you. Not being privy to your particular situation, when dealing with a narcissist/sociopath, one tactic that they use in order to pull off the above three is isolation. They will purposely isolate you from your family, your closest friends, and they will even make you doubt as to why you would even select or choose those people in your life, as if you did not have good judgment in making choices. The tactics in the strategies that they use are very similar to what a cult leader would do in making that person totally dependent on them. In other words Jennifer they have you to begin to doubt your own reality and to believe that what they are telling you is the truth. It is the most harmful and psychological torture that you could ever do to another human being. If there are children involved, they will use the child or children to hurt you. This is actually criminal domestic violence as they are using the child as a weapon targeted toward you. Narcissist/sociopaths are master manipulators and their targets are generally people who they can easily maneuver. I do not even know you, but if you are a victim of a narcissist/sociopath you are more than likely a person who is kind, generous, loving, forgiving, and very empathetic to those around you. For the most part, you are probably one of those people in which others flock to in sharing their problems and concerns in knowing that you will listen and help if needed. You are now considered a prime target for a narcissist. I met my ex on a Christian dating website, never even thinking that there would be predators using that site to find the type of person who could take such abuse.
@@jenniferpagone939 How does it seem that a narcissist or a sociopath always seems to win in court. In the beginning of the relationship they were totally invested in you and it is during that time that what they are actually doing is getting information from you that they can use later on to control you. Trust me, they will use it even in a court of law. The question is then brought forward as to how does a narcissist or a sociopath always seem to win. The answer is very simple. They have already written the script of their life from beginning to end not leaving out any details. Think of a Broadway play for example. That play, if successful, may be seen over a period of years. During that time frame, the story does not change, however, the people who play those characters do. The narcissist is the Director and will replace those people by going through several auditions before selecting the candidate that will play the part that best meets the purpose the Narcissist has in mind. There is one more thing that changes. While that play is running, although the characters remain the same, there are different people playing those parts. You also have a different audience each night who sees the play for the first time. Who is the “Star” of the play? In our scenario it is not the lead actor or actress, it is the Writer, Producer, and Director of the play. It is the Narcissist. Many people have told me that this illustration has helped them to understand how a narcissist/sociopath thinks and how they operate. Going back to the play, who are the actors that are being replaced throughout the run of the play. They are your third party participants in court. They are your GAL’s, they are the forensic psychologist, they are the mediators, the court evaluators, the therapists, law enforcement, and the Attorneys. Who then is the ever changing audience? It is the Judge. Narcissistic and sociopathic people are accomplished liars. They possess what Dr. Steven Miller calls the 4 C’s. They are charming, confident, convincing, and calm. They are masters at mimicking good behavior and can size up a person rather quickly in knowing what emotional strings to pull in order to draw that person in. I want you to know how they think and how they operate, so that you can plan your best strategy. Using the above scenario, my ex has had nine attorneys and to each of those attorneys, she has told the same lies. He or she does the same with all the third party participants. If you want to better understand that concept I would Google Shawn Wygant, third party alienation. There is a reason to filing frivolous motions and to use the court system as their stage to accomplish their ultimate goal. Generally speaking there are judges who are assigned to a given area of the state and then there are those judges who rotate or “float“ to help with the number of cases that need to be heard. When you have had several different attorneys who have been in front of several different judges with the same story and narrative that the narcissist has written, all of a sudden there seems to be truth that is found in a lie. In most cases the same judge will have heard it at least twice, but from a different attorney representing the narcissist . Because of the number of cases that needs to be heard, they have a tendency to lean on attorneys and if possible pass the decision to be made by the GAL’s or other third-party participants. Let’s face it, privileged client/attorney information is shared. People talk! It is impossible to win a case by representing yourself pro se. I will even go one step further in stating that most attorneys do not get this either. Narcissistic/sociopathic people are very insecure and they go to great strides so that no one exposes or sees them for who they truly are. The first thing you need to realize is they are accomplished liars. You cannot believe one thing that comes out of their mouth. The other thing that you need to realize is that in the devaluing stage you begin to second guess yourself and the things being said about you are not true. This puts you in a defensive mode in which you are constantly trying to preserve your good name. Let me just say don’t even bother to waste your time, because everything that you write in regard to trying to prove to the world that you are not this person, the more it looks like to the world that you are the one who is crazy.
My ex husband took the kids turned them against me and threw away gifts and letters to them that I sent. He told them I abandoned them while he refused to respond to emails and phone calls. I haven’t seen my sons in years. It’s heartbreaking that he could be this ruthless. He’s harming them!
@@L.K.2511 I guess, the only thing we can do is live a good life and hope that they will come around and see the truth for themselves. I wish you the best!
It's actively happening many people out there. Their is a way of tackling this. It is something a lot of alienated parents miss during this time. Trust me. I have had the lot thrown at me. There isn't much I haven't been accused of at this point. What's more concerning is how my own children appear to have this "matter of fact" attitude towards me at times. In layman's terms and as sad as it sounds. They are victims of extreme alienation. Like I said. There is a way to achieve what you are being blocked from. When the alienating parent does her best to avoid contact and tell the children and friends a completely different thing to what is actually happening officially then is the Time to worry. I think the most obvious way of dealing with the situation is the often not seen. Most of you here will agree. Professionals involved seem more supportive over the alienators through my research. That is something most of us accepts. Oddly enough. Alienators and Narraccistic traits go hand in hand. I will say this to everybody reading this. Never ever take what your children repeat as anything personal. Never. They know no better if the alienated parent has been forced out of their life. Remember that. It isn't the children's problem at all.
@@Bogna1dude I have been through 10 years of this and I’m an accomplished woman with a 2 year old I have FULL TIME. You have to keep fighting to prove you are making efforts. Even if it’s embarrassing to do supervised visits, still do them. It proves that your ex was lying about you. My ex has done this in 3 different jurisdictions, yet has other kids and never sees them. He also did this and completely alienated another woman from their son, got an order of protection, etc. Reach out to your child and never stop. They will find out the truth. Never stop loving them.
I've witnessed this happening to many parents. It's crucial to tackle parental alienation head-on. It's heartbreaking when your own kids are indoctrinated against you. Seek professional guidance, keep a level head, and remember, your kids are not to blame. Stay strong.
Most of the time the target is the father. Women get awarded custody nearly 90% of the time. Only 17% of custodial parents were fathers according to the U.S census in 2016. That being said, mothers disproportionately alienate fathers and they do so with the aid of state and federal government. Men are nearly always the target of parental alienation by default.
@@deadsetanime7102 that is not true. I’ve seen woman alienated from their child too. It’s not gender based it is trauma based. The parent that starts the alienation process had some sort of “cut off from a parent. My mother was cut off from her father and I never saw my Grandfather because my mom expressed her ideas about loyalty so it was evident if I didn’t agree with my mom and met my Grandfather. I would lose her affection.
@@karendalsadik7119 Anecdotes are not data. They are personal stories. You are talking about singular situations while I am talking about trends in the aggregate.
I'm going through this now as a targeted parent. The comment below is spot on--dying over and over again inside--but the worst feeling is that my daughter is in distress and I have no idea how to help her. The courts think I'm the problem.
It's heartbreaking to feel helpless when your child is in distress. The court's perception can be frustrating, but stay strong and keep fighting for your daughter's well-being. Your love and determination will make a difference.
Why did they use an example of a father alienating the mom? It's almost always the other way around. Fathers get treated like dirt by lawyers and courts and mothers get an insane amount of power and control over fathers.
As an advocate for alienated fathers, it's disappointing to see the focus on one gender when parental alienation can happen to either parent. The imbalance in the legal system is a real issue affecting fathers' rights. Let's work towards fair treatment for all parents.
Well it's been 10 years since I last saw my kids and my ex and her family made it very clear I'd have trouble. I was accused of molestation of 1 of my daughters, I was accused of sexual assault by my ex mother in law. One day I heard my ex's words from my 8 year old son. I knew it wouldn't stop ever. I was in and out of police cells until they got me banned from the area. I left the town knowing I'd never know my children again. 2013 done. Malicious accusations seem easier for women against men and are pushed harder by police and prosecution to tick boxes. Well I don't know my children now and my ex still spouts lies on Facebook to this day. A bitter woman. I assume now that I'll never know my children and consider changing my name and leaving the country for good.
I am a woman and both a lawyer and a psychologist (developmental trauma of all things).I absolutely know that you are correct in saying that men have a far harder time in this situation and our system than women. As a child myself, my mother, sister and mother's friends bullied me terribly because I am 'Just like your dear old Dad.' I am his 'image'. My father never left me and he sometimes had to go through all manner of insanity just trying to locate my brother and I. My older sister was 'obedient' to our mother's wishes. But one day, as adults, she asked me: 'What do you tell people?' I knew instantly what she meant. To the outside it will have looked like life with our mother was comfortable and safe. We both agreed that if it had been our father who abused us, it would have been easier because people just would not accept that a mother/woman would be so cold-blooded. She left us to the wolves to starve while she went off traveling and to the opera etc with her friends. My school teachers did try to help but the Court and everyone else involved just refused to accept that children aren't always better with their mothers. I tell people nothing, I said. I had people around me that never asked me about myself anyway. Last week I got a letter from my brother and he was discussing trip he took with our father. He and I can only share these memories in secret together. This is another thing that women have got to own about themselves and one another. I have worked as a lawyer with many men who have been through this and I always address it as a major issue and seek to ensure that the court informs the other parent what behaviours and attitudes are deemed acceptable boundaries and bet for their children. We give birth but we do not own our children. Some women feel if they divorce him, she comes as a package including the kids who are meant to disconnect from their fathers. Oddly, I married a man who has now completely alienated both my daughter and my son against me. My daughter has always been very attached to him and I have always accommodated that, even over accommodated. But my son was always so proud of me, admired and respected me. They both come to me to talk about their deepest truths and issues. But if I am not a demon, then. in their minds, they lose him. I have been devastated beyond words these past few weeks over this. I wish you all the best. Do NOT ever let them go, even if you do not get to see them, they need to know you showed up and tried. That means EVERYTHING!
@@tarawalsh-arpaia3928i am grateful for women like you who are honest and open and truthful about this issue. I really hope your children understand that you love them and with time all the false accusations your ex made about you to them will come to light.
@@beataannanowak659 same here….and it’s because I finally stopped caring and responding to his severe emotional abuse. Now he’s turned my daughter against me and I have no idea what to do or where to start. No just remind her daily that I love her and will always be here for her. She ignores my texts. He’s abandoned her so many times before, and has another child and just found out another on the way (he doesn’t know I know) and is now trying to tell my family I’ve done something to hurt her (but he doesn’t want to tell them what 🙄) and is telling me that I’m a horrible mom (as he’s always said) that my own child wants nothing to do with me. He thinks it’s hilarious that she disrespects me and slams doors in my face when I tell her I love her. She acts just like he always did. Idk what to do. 😭
if he's put any of if in writing, it's likely and defamation. make him prove it in court. yes it will cost. but he will be exposed. plan carefully, be ultra careful around the child and document everything. if you can record conversations, then do. if any of the people he's defamed you to repeat what he's said, that's slander, and they can also be taken to court for that. I suspect once the peripheral 'friends" find themselves on the end of a subpoena, which will be public knowledge,.things might dry up.for him.pretty quick. but plan and double check everything. and accept you'll have to pay. if you can apply for legal aid of some sort do. but once it looks like private things are going to be made public and you CAN prove what you're alleging, then the other party are in trouble. but time it carefully. very carefully. and be consistent and emotionally available no matter what for your child. that's all you can do. and make sure whoever you consult REALLY knows their stuff. check them out by running their name past some of the experts on this channel perhaps?
Now couple that with Gang Assault, because that's what happens when the fathers family, community and others that he manipulates on a Narcissistic wave length pattern accomplish together and the legal profession is not trained, nor do they want to be trained in these areas because the court system of the United States runs on drama, not on any level of sound conciousness with high morals. This country is weak, vulnerable and in prime position for take over and we can all blame that on our weak legal system with no true knowledge, operating on high school tendencies of childlike behavior.
@@uncertifiedlinguist8396 sorry, I never hit my daughter. I’m thinking he did more than one punch. My father slapped me across the face when aI was 13. I had braces so it busted lip. I said”does that make you feel like a man?’ He hit me again,
This situation is truly heart-wrenching. It's devastating to see the impact of parental alienation on families. My heart goes out to those who are experiencing this pain. Let's raise awareness and work towards preventing such harmful behavior.
I love my kids so much and it's hurting my heart so much every night that I go to bed thinking of them not here with me. My ex-husband has cut off ties and has told me that I am to only contact the kids directly to see if they want to visit. He takes their phones away from them and deletes messags from me. I haven't seen them in 6 months now.
My ex dies this too while mentally and physically intimidating the kids. My daughter is 24 and my son is 16. Sadly, my daughter is with me now and she sees through him. He’s definitely a narcissist and a sociopath. My son is starting to form opinions and refusing to dance to his fathers tune so dad is now trying to physically intimidate him. That old man better watch out! My son is an athlete and 6’1”. He could hurt dad if he wanted to. But I hate to see it come to that. It’s all started when we were young and he was a virgin and I had past boyfriends. This angered him so much he wanted absolute control and tried to alienate me from my family. It’s difficult. Hang in there and be strong! Your kids will see one day who the loving parent is. 😊
This situation is heartbreaking. It's important to stay strong and keep fighting for your relationship with your children. Things may seem tough now, but don't lose hope. Stay determined and seek support. It's never too late to reunite with your kids.
As an advocate for alienated parents, it is disheartening to see how parental alienation is often overlooked when it involves men. This bias undermines the pain and suffering that both fathers and mothers experience in such situations. It's crucial for society to recognize and address this issue fairly.
P.A. is so mean and evil. My ex-wife has turned 5 of our 6 children from me. I have not seen nor heard from most of them for years now. It is true parental abuse. And breaks my heart as I dearly love my children. I have family videos and personal cards from my children saying what a great Dad that I am. Decades of these wonderful accolades.
P.A.'s actions are causing great harm. I fear for the impact on your family. As an advocate, I believe in your right to a strong relationship with your children. Stay strong and seek support.
True. I am a lawyer and have worked in this area and you are 1000% right. In Ireland, where I practice (though I am American), parental alienation is part of the most current domestic abuse laws include parental alienation and a person can seek a court order wherein a court will, in no uncertain terms, let the other parent know that this is absolutely unacceptable.
Look up Ty and Brynlee Larson. The children who are forced into “therapy” with this woman come out with horrific (and extremely consistent) stories. Parents who have been accused and even convicted of abuse just have to cry “alienation” and she swoops in, gets them dragged out of the house, and simply “alienates” the other parent by telling them everything they know is a lie. She’s vile and the people here buying her story need help.
Absolutely shocking! These children deserve better. Predatory behavior masked as therapy is despicable. The impact on families is heartbreaking. Severe action must be taken to protect vulnerable children. #EndParentalAlienation
I don’t understand how anyone can refute that this is very real. I’ve been fighting for every minute with my child against a deeply disturbed mom and the broken system of the Family Courts for almost 5 years
Parental alienation is real AND the concept of it is used and abused by abusive parents who want custody and therapists like this who make a lot of money “reuniting” abusers with their victims.
Incredibly, most therapists dont have an understanding of psychological manipulation and end up doing more harm than good. Courts are the same, or worse.
i am dealing with Parental Alienation by a counselor at a kids camp. The camp has been notified and they have continued to allow this person to continue to work here. I am wondering how to keep my kid socialized but take care of this issue. Of course my kiddo is at home but this counselor has conviced my child to hide things from me and has filled her head with stuff no child should be burdened with thinking about. im between a rock and a hard place because this is the best socialization I can afford and I have no where to turn to for help.
Amber, this is not parental alienation. Parental alienation is when you have a spouse that is alienating you from your child. What’s even more surprising is a stranger is having this kind of control over your daughter with limited access to her. None of this makes any sense to me and I think you might be in the wrong area for help. You are the parent. Find another avenue. And separate both yourself and your daughter from this man by seeking somewhere else to work.
@Vincent Kinsler It's not always a parent. In my case, it's the parternal grandmother that adjoined herself to my divorce and gained guardianship of my daughter with lies and manipulation. It's been 10 years now, and it was / still is an extreme case of parental alienation. My daughter is 18 now, and the damage is so bad that I have now given up.
I think you should try to either contact your local social work department (good luck) and/or go to the court clerk's office and apply for an order against parental alienation. Do NOT give up! It made every difference to my brother and I that our father always did even when he didn't get to see us. We knew we were of great value, loved and precious to him.
I am sorry to hear about the challenges you are facing. Parental alienation is a serious issue that can have long-lasting effects on both you and your child. It's important to seek support and guidance from professionals who are experienced in dealing with this issue. Socialization is crucial, but it's also important to prioritize your child's emotional well-being. Stay strong and continue advocating for your child's best interests.
I'll never abandon my son I will fight for the rest of my life if I have to my son is worth fighting for I too am alienated from my son I will never give up on him ever
No, never do that. Mine always showed up even when we couldn't see him and now that we are grown, it makes all the difference to my brother and I to know how loved and precious we were to him just as we are.
While it may seem tempting to give up, abandoning your children is never the best course of action. As a parent, it's important to persevere and seek solutions that prioritize the well-being of your children. Family relationships are worth fighting for.
Can parental alienation be a mix? I never had a good relationship with ex wife when she left she took my kids 10,11. My daughter days she hates me and i will never be her dad. I was not good with their mother i admit but i never treated my kids bad i love them with all my heart and let them know that every single day. I did all the normal stuff a loving dad does with his son and daughter. They are my life. How do I know if they really hate me for the fights with their mother or its just parental alienation or is it a mix of both? I don't understand how my daughter could say something so mean. Am trying to understand how I hurt her I look at all our photos and we have so may happy memories together. I never once treated them bad. Does anyone have any input?
It's a tragic reality that many parents have faced being alienated from their children for extended periods. The emotional toll and long-term effects of such situations are truly devastating. It's a heartbreaking situation that needs more awareness and support for families affected.
Sadly, the bias towards fathers in parental alienation cases is concerning. It's time for a shift in the narrative and fair treatment for all parents. Hopefully, awareness will lead to positive change for families.
And it’s important not to talk bad about the other parent even though I dislike the mother I do my best not to talk bad about her even though they’re all adults that just because she was a bad person that me I have to be I have to leave by example that with my words!!!💯✊🛠☮️🌿🍀
Hey mike mathews just an FYI. It is the gender confrontation on women and men. That really thwart the PAS from being recognized and courts trying to address it. The more a female or male parent lashes out in the PAS community you actually help ALL alienators succeed. This is probably the number 1 reason why we all can’t move forward with this horrific abuse on a child. Honestly it’s been over 2 years on zero contact with my son. The courts are exhausted hearing this to and fro. Men lose out more than women….this happens to women …. Blah blah blah. The children are never heard. So the more men bash and the more women bash the further behind we fall. Also PAS is an incredible money train for more than the parents paying support.
@@Gen_XGal because the parent that hears the child and has good intentions loses to the malicious parent. Domestic relations is the problem. Feminism has told women to hate and abuse men
I dont know if its still true, but it used to be that women were assumed to do no wrong and because of that, they were doing Parental Alienation more than men. I think that may have changed somewhat.
It's important to recognize that parental alienation can occur regardless of gender. Awareness and education are key to addressing this issue and ensuring the well-being of children caught in the middle.
As a single father of three boys who never got a dime of child support I just feel blessed I have a good family to help me raise my boys and my mom was a good mom to them boys need men in their lives it’s a very important thing!!!!💯✊🛠☮️🙏🌿
Why would you need child support? Time is child support, when you have them you take care of them when they have them they take care of them unless situations where one parent is down and you want to insure your child has what they need but nothing will take away 2 loving parents regardless of where they may reside primarily
My husband’s ex wife Alienated his children from him the biological mother grandmother great grandmother she’s a mental health counselor for children and work for the courts
It is deeply concerning when parents use their influence to alienate children from their other parent. It's especially troubling when someone in a position of trust, like a mental health counselor, engages in such behavior. The impact on the children and the relationship is devastating.
PARENTAL ALIENTATION_ ANOTHER WORD FOR SEGREGATION - FORM CHANGES SUBSTANCE REMAINS, REFERENCE CIVIL RIGHTS ACT 1968, INVESTIGATE: KRITIKOS VS DEROSA SALEM MA PROBATE
Unfortunately, I cannot view external links, but based on the information provided in your comment, it seems like a serious issue that needs attention. Parental alienation can have long-lasting effects on families. It's crucial to address this issue and find solutions that prioritize the well-being of children and the relationships with both parents. Character assassinations and segregation are unacceptable in any form. It's essential to investigate and address cases like Kritikos vs. DeRosa to promote fairness and justice in family matters.
This comment appears to express doubt about the identity of the baker in the video. It is possible that there's a misunderstanding or confusion regarding the person featured. It's key to ensure accurate information before making assumptions.
This comment provides valuable insights into the complexities of parental alienation. It's concerning to see the emotional toll it takes on families. Hopefully, awareness and support will increase to prevent such heartbreaking situations.
As an advocate for alienated parents, I predict that the trend of maternal alienation will continue to be a prevalent issue unless awareness and support for both fathers and mothers are increased. {NAME}, it's crucial to recognize and address the challenges faced by alienated parents to ensure the well-being of their children.
Typically mothers are granted primary custody, but it's important to recognize that both genders can be guilty of parental alienation. Let's focus on promoting healthy co-parenting and putting the child's best interest first.
I’m in the same situation and I’m dying over and over again inside. Thank you so much for acknowledging this.
Me too!:(
I hear you, and I'm so sorry you're going through this pain. It's incredibly tough, but remember you are not alone in this struggle. Keep holding on to hope.
As someone going through this, parental alienation most certainly is very real and more prolific than others realize, and can happen to both men and women. It's soul crushing when you do all you can to be a loving parent, yet you are treated like dirt by the system and all involved in it as if you are some kind of monster. For anyone going through this, please know that some of us understand and we hear you.
Maybe that's a YOU problem.
We hear you too. ✊👊❤
I've been living as targeted parent for 7+ years. After meeting with a court counselor and judge last week. As we were leaving the court room. My ex turned around and mouthed "good luck" meaning she's turned our boys against me. Good luck trying to reconnect with them. She's sick.
@@chadfeathers3001
Her remark sounds like one a narc would make.
Though imo, there is no such thing as luck. I pray the word spell casted over your child(ren) by her be utterly and completely broken; and the truth revealed in Jesus name, amen.
Growing up, my mom would try to alienate me and my little sister from my dad (they divorced in the mid to late 2000s). I’d reject the things she’d try to tell me, which strained my relationship with her. It wasn’t until my dad died on August 2013 that my mom realized what she did to me was wrong. She died four months later. I still feel resentment about it to this day. Kids should NEVER have to have one guardian talk trash about the other one.
Hey, metal pipe and carrots. I am so sorry you went through this. You did not deserve to be put in the middle of their emotional problems like that. You deserved better. No matter what, I hope you can find some peace in your mother coming back and taking accountability for her actions. That is incredibly difficult for most people to do, especially when so much pain has been inflicted and they know they are the reason. I’m so glad you’re here, and I truly wish the best for you in your life. I hope you have found or do soon find your constants, and that unconditional love and support you were always worthy of receiving. God bless you. Much love, family.
It's heartbreaking to hear about the impact of parental alienation on your relationship with your dad. Hopefully, your experience can serve as a cautionary tale, pushing for awareness and change in how parents handle divorce and custody. The lasting effects of such actions can be profound.
It seems Parental Alienation seems impossible to believe until it happens to you. This is taking things to an extreme but this happens on a less drastic level frequently when Narcissism is involved!!
It happened to me. Double tag team with Grandma and my exfiancee.
Sadly 😥
It’s the worst thing in the entire world. The only thing worse is the death of your children.
It’s a torturous nightmare you cannot wake up from.
It is happening to me right now. I don't know what to do.
@@karendalsadik7119 It is happening to me right now. I don't want to lose my son forever. Please help.
I know too many fathers experiencing this. I knew about Parental Alienation, but truly felt the effects of Parental Alienation when my ex-wife alienated my children from me. Aside from refusing to let me see them, she poisoned them against me and even made the oldest file a false complaints of abuse against me. This was the lowest point in my life, waking up one day and realizing your children hate you and you haven’t done anything to deserve it. Eventually my ex-wife’s own mother spoke on my behalf in family court because our oldest daughter told her grandmother, that my ex-wife made her make false complaints of abuse. I eventually received primary custody but it’s been an uphill battle with my kids. It’s like they’ve been brainwashed. Parents who engage in Parental Alienation should be prosecuted.
Fathers are pedophiles
@@silverpairaducks and how are fathers Pedophiles and where did you get this information.
Oh man I'm so sorry. Going through it right now.
I am a woman and experience the same thing. In my case, actually my ex mother play big role in this, even bigger than him. She is like trying to be mother herself for my child.
I'm so sorry omg I'm my kids and are are you going through it! :(
I think one of the hardest things for targeted parents such as myself is believing that another parent would take such extreme measures to not just alienate you from your child’s life, but with the ultimate goal to eliminate you all together. According to Dr. Steven G. Miller, these cases are highly counterintuitive in which attorneys, judges, GAL‘s, forensics psychologist, therapist, and even court evaluators, get these cases completely backwards. They see alienation cases as they do any other high conflict custody case. The truth is that these cases are high conflict, however, with that said, there is a significant difference in these cases which separate them from just any other high conflict custody case. Yes, it is true that in an alienation case there is conflict, but the difference is you have one parent, who controls access to the child or children whether that is through taking away your parenting time, or blocking you from your child’s medical and educational records, or even being able to speak with them by phone, or requesting additional time with your child or children.
The reason that I wanted to post this to the website is not for personal recognition, but to help other targeted parents, who do not know where to turn to for help. It is a very frustrating experience that leaves one confused, bewildered, and overwhelmed in trying to understand it. For me, it has been an 11 year journey in trying to find experts, who could help me to better understand what I was going through and how to prepare myself in being able to move forward. In 95% of these cases, you are dealing with an ex or parent, who is suffering from an undiagnosed “B“ personality disorder, whether that be borderline personality disorder, narcissistic personality disorder, a sociopath, or even a psychopath.
If you are experiencing any of the above behaviors from your ex, or soon to be ex, you need to protect yourself and set boundaries, which will benefit you when it comes time to be heard in court. Be extremely careful in what you say around your child or children as the alienating parent will draw from any information that the children may take back with them after their time with you has ended. You also need to know that this type of parent is extremely deceptive and yet is undermining you every chance he or she has in order to annihilate you in the end. Every single thing that you shared with this person, who you thought truly cared about you was only recording information to use against you in court.
As a targeted parent, it is essential to have a diary or log of everything that you or your child or children are experiencing in regard to the alienating parent. Please note the importance of the documentation, as this may be the only thing that you have that you can use against that parent in court. For one, they generally tend to be very charming, convincing, confident, and charismatic. They are also accomplished liars and will distort the truth and even make up lies and false allegations to substantiate their case against you. Even if it is something as simple as a missed call or being able to speak with your child due to frivolous excuses such as the other parent stating, “I just put them to bed or my phone was charging and I didn’t see the call.“ Write down every occurrence that takes place which includes, but not limited to text messages, emails, and phone conversations and the day and time to the very second it took place.
There is one thing that holds true for every Alienating parent and that is they are predictable. Due to the fact that they tell so many lies, if you keep a very accurate account of what your ex states, they will eventually trip themselves up in their own lies and you will have a record of it. You almost have to set them up to present your case.
Please, also note, that the reason to have a record of everything that is said and done, in regard to alienating you from your child, whether that is even changing a doctor’s appointment at the last minute so you cant be there; it must be recorded. Due to their use of coercive control, once you start recording everything that is taking place you will eventually see a pattern as to how they operate, which is going to give you an advantage in court. For example, my ex, before school would begin in the Fall, would start medicating our child with allergy medications and steroids, which prohibited him from using cognitive reasoning skills and heightened his aggressiveness. She would then have him tested by an out side behavioral psychologist, which reflected that our child was experiencing poor academic ability due to a “slow working memory” and having behavioral issues at school which mirrored ADHD. What my child was suffering from was toxic stress. My ex’s insidious plan was to have our child labeled mentally impaired, so that he would receive an IEP/504 Program for being a special needs child. When she knew that I was onto her and what she was doing, she had an Ex-Parte filed against me. Our child never had allergies and now she has graduated to giving him Psychotic Drugs by not even getting a diagnosis of ADHD, but based on an assessment she had done from the child’s pediatrician.
In regard to having representation, most attorneys will tell you that they have experience in alienation cases, but don’t believe them, because it’s generally a lie. All they want is your money and they take advantage of the situation by having you to write down everything about your ex and what bothers you about them and what they are doing that is negatively impacting your child or children. Your ex’s attorney is doing the same, therefore, the two attorneys, although supposedly protecting “client privileged information,“ is sharing those concerns to fuel the situation in order to yield higher than expected litigation fees that never seem to identify the root cause of the underlying family dynamic that is causing you to be alienated from your child. Family Court Cases are sadly a business that brings in 50-80 Billion Dollars a year in revenue.
Instead of spending tens of thousands of dollars in attorney fees, I am giving you advice based on my own personal experience. Once you have had a chance to document to the point of actually being able to see a pattern, which may take 6 to 12 to 18 months before you can actually see the pattern, it’s better to do that than to be where I am 11 years later. Take that information and find an expert that deals specifically with your type of case. That expert will then take the information that you have given them, which will probably be through their assistant and not directly to them, in which they will do an overview of the entire case and if enough evidence is there can testify on the child’s behalf as to what is happening, as most judges are not versed in these type of cases. For example, if your ex is using medical abuse, then you would need to find someone who specializes in factitious disorder imposed on another.
I think one of the hardest things for targeted parents such as myself is believing that another parent would take such extreme measures to not just alienate you from your child’s life, but with the ultimate goal to eliminate you all together. I have taken the liberty to include resources, as that seems to be a disadvantage to targeted parents, who are clueless as to where to seek help. By the time you begin to figure all this out for yourself, unfortunately, your ex is so far ahead in the game, that there is no level playing field. I don’t want you to have to go through what I went through, therefore, hopefully this will give you a jump start that I did not have. If you have not raised children and this is your first child in which you are caught in this conflict, there are several resources in books that I would highly recommend in knowing how to effectively raise children. Two of those books are written by Dr. James Dobson, and those titles would be “Bringing up Boys,” and “Bringing up Girls.” The third book would be “123 Magic,” by Thomas W. Phelan.
Hang in there, take care of yourself, and never worry about tomorrow, but focus on today and ask God to direct your steps as to what He wants you to do today and leave the results up to Him. My best to all of you in your quest.
Vincent Kinsler
Charlotte, NC
@Happy Dog Your response left for tragic reading. From every standpoint, you have done everything I know that a parent could possibly do, but yet it seems to never measure up. The hardest people to love is family. Don’t neglect yourself or your own care. Find your communities and invest your life where it brings back a sense of joy and self-worth to your life. Only you can make that decision as to when to stop giving so much of yourself, but give yourself time to grow and expand and invest in new relationships. Instead of waiting on life to begin by having your life dictated by someone else, start living life today with those people who will appreciate you for you. It starts by loving you and once you can do that, it is amazing what will follow!
Vincent
@Happy Dog ua-cam.com/video/TDKCNSWlS4g/v-deo.html
Omggg I am amd been dealing with this!! Who can I turn to prove our point or is it too late already
@@jenniferpagone939 Jennifer, let me answer your question by first stating that it’s never too late. As a matter of fact, today can be the start of not only a new day, but a new future and a new beginning. Narcissist use three tactics in a relationship. 1. They idealize you. 2. They devalue you. 3. They discard you. Not being privy to your particular situation, when dealing with a narcissist/sociopath, one tactic that they use in order to pull off the above three is isolation. They will purposely isolate you from your family, your closest friends, and they will even make you doubt as to why you would even select or choose those people in your life, as if you did not have good judgment in making choices. The tactics in the strategies that they use are very similar to what a cult leader would do in making that person totally dependent on them. In other words Jennifer they have you to begin to doubt your own reality and to believe that what they are telling you is the truth. It is the most harmful and psychological torture that you could ever do to another human being. If there are children involved, they will use the child or children to hurt you. This is actually criminal domestic violence as they are using the child as a weapon targeted toward you. Narcissist/sociopaths are master manipulators and their targets are generally people who they can easily maneuver. I do not even know you, but if you are a victim of a narcissist/sociopath you are more than likely a person who is kind, generous, loving, forgiving, and very empathetic to those around you. For the most part, you are probably one of those people in which others flock to in sharing their problems and concerns in knowing that you will listen and help if needed. You are now considered a prime target for a narcissist. I met my ex on a Christian dating website, never even thinking that there would be predators using that site to find the type of person who could take such abuse.
@@jenniferpagone939 How does it seem that a narcissist or a sociopath always seems to win in court. In the beginning of the relationship they were totally invested in you and it is during that time that what they are actually doing is getting information from you that they can use later on to control you. Trust me, they will use it even in a court of law.
The question is then brought forward as to how does a narcissist or a sociopath always seem to win. The answer is very simple. They have already written the script of their life from beginning to end not leaving out any details. Think of a Broadway play for example. That play, if successful, may be seen over a period of years. During that time frame, the story does not change, however, the people who play those characters do. The narcissist is the Director and will replace those people by going through several auditions before selecting the candidate that will play the part that best meets the purpose the Narcissist has in mind. There is one more thing that changes. While that play is running, although the characters remain the same, there are different people playing those parts. You also have a different audience each night who sees the play for the first time. Who is the “Star” of the play? In our scenario it is not the lead actor or actress, it is the Writer, Producer, and Director of the play. It is the Narcissist.
Many people have told me that this illustration has helped them to understand how a narcissist/sociopath thinks and how they operate. Going back to the play, who are the actors that are being replaced throughout the run of the play. They are your third party participants in court. They are your GAL’s, they are the forensic psychologist, they are the mediators, the court evaluators, the therapists, law enforcement, and the Attorneys. Who then is the ever changing audience? It is the Judge.
Narcissistic and sociopathic people are accomplished liars. They possess what Dr. Steven Miller calls the 4 C’s. They are charming, confident, convincing, and calm. They are masters at mimicking good behavior and can size up a person rather quickly in knowing what emotional strings to pull in order to draw that person in. I want you to know how they think and how they operate, so that you can plan your best strategy. Using the above scenario, my ex has had nine attorneys and to each of those attorneys, she has told the same lies. He or she does the same with all the third party participants. If you want to better understand that concept I would Google Shawn Wygant, third party alienation. There is a reason to filing frivolous motions and to use the court system as their stage to accomplish their ultimate goal. Generally speaking there are judges who are assigned to a given area of the state and then there are those judges who rotate or “float“ to help with the number of cases that need to be heard.
When you have had several different attorneys who have been in front of several different judges with the same story and narrative that the narcissist has written, all of a sudden there seems to be truth that is found in a lie. In most cases the same judge will have heard it at least twice, but from a different attorney representing the narcissist . Because of the number of cases that needs to be heard, they have a tendency to lean on attorneys and if possible pass the decision to be made by the GAL’s or other third-party participants. Let’s face it, privileged client/attorney information is shared. People talk!
It is impossible to win a case by representing yourself pro se. I will even go one step further in stating that most attorneys do not get this either. Narcissistic/sociopathic people are very insecure and they go to great strides so that no one exposes or sees them for who they truly are. The first thing you need to realize is they are accomplished liars. You cannot believe one thing that comes out of their mouth. The other thing that you need to realize is that in the devaluing stage you begin to second guess yourself and the things being said about you are not true. This puts you in a defensive mode in which you are constantly trying to preserve your good name. Let me just say don’t even bother to waste your time, because everything that you write in regard to trying to prove to the world that you are not this person, the more it looks like to the world that you are the one who is crazy.
My ex husband took the kids turned them against me and threw away gifts and letters to them that I sent. He told them I abandoned them while he refused to respond to emails and phone calls. I haven’t seen my sons in years. It’s heartbreaking that he could be this ruthless. He’s harming them!
It literally is child abuse
Yup my ex girlfriend done the same. My son turns 8 next week I have yet to meet him and doubt I ever will.
@@jshsamuelson I think so too.
@@L.K.2511 I guess, the only thing we can do is live a good life and hope that they will come around and see the truth for themselves. I wish you the best!
@@Tyndalic thanks man
It's actively happening many people out there. Their is a way of tackling this. It is something a lot of alienated parents miss during this time. Trust me. I have had the lot thrown at me. There isn't much I haven't been accused of at this point. What's more concerning is how my own children appear to have this "matter of fact" attitude towards me at times. In layman's terms and as sad as it sounds. They are victims of extreme alienation. Like I said. There is a way to achieve what you are being blocked from. When the alienating parent does her best to avoid contact and tell the children and friends a completely different thing to what is actually happening officially then is the Time to worry. I think the most obvious way of dealing with the situation is the often not seen. Most of you here will agree. Professionals involved seem more supportive over the alienators through my research. That is something most of us accepts. Oddly enough. Alienators and Narraccistic traits go hand in hand. I will say this to everybody reading this. Never ever take what your children repeat as anything personal. Never. They know no better if the alienated parent has been forced out of their life. Remember that. It isn't the children's problem at all.
Ok, but how can we survive it? Is this possible that child will see real true eventually?
@@Bogna1dude I have been through 10 years of this and I’m an accomplished woman with a 2 year old I have FULL TIME. You have to keep fighting to prove you are making efforts. Even if it’s embarrassing to do supervised visits, still do them. It proves that your ex was lying about you. My ex has done this in 3 different jurisdictions, yet has other kids and never sees them. He also did this and completely alienated another woman from their son, got an order of protection, etc.
Reach out to your child and never stop. They will find out the truth. Never stop loving them.
You talk around a way of tackling it, but what actually *is* it that you're referring to that can help?
I've witnessed this happening to many parents. It's crucial to tackle parental alienation head-on. It's heartbreaking when your own kids are indoctrinated against you. Seek professional guidance, keep a level head, and remember, your kids are not to blame. Stay strong.
This too also happens to men. Dads get the short end of the stick too!
Yes it does. It happens to parents and the child very sad.
Yes they do. There are other videos about the target being the father.
Most of the time the target is the father. Women get awarded custody nearly 90% of the time. Only 17% of custodial parents were fathers according to the U.S census in 2016. That being said, mothers disproportionately alienate fathers and they do so with the aid of state and federal government. Men are nearly always the target of parental alienation by default.
@@deadsetanime7102 that is not true. I’ve seen woman alienated from their child too. It’s not gender based it is trauma based. The parent that starts the alienation process had some sort of “cut off from a parent. My mother was cut off from her father and I never saw my Grandfather because my mom expressed her ideas about loyalty so it was evident if I didn’t agree with my mom and met my Grandfather. I would lose her affection.
@@karendalsadik7119 Anecdotes are not data. They are personal stories. You are talking about singular situations while I am talking about trends in the aggregate.
I'm going through this now as a targeted parent. The comment below is spot on--dying over and over again inside--but the worst feeling is that my daughter is in distress and I have no idea how to help her. The courts think I'm the problem.
Hope things get better. It’s stories like this that make me not look forward to having kids
It's heartbreaking to feel helpless when your child is in distress. The court's perception can be frustrating, but stay strong and keep fighting for your daughter's well-being. Your love and determination will make a difference.
Why did they use an example of a father alienating the mom? It's almost always the other way around. Fathers get treated like dirt by lawyers and courts and mothers get an insane amount of power and control over fathers.
As an advocate for alienated fathers, it's disappointing to see the focus on one gender when parental alienation can happen to either parent. The imbalance in the legal system is a real issue affecting fathers' rights. Let's work towards fair treatment for all parents.
Well it's been 10 years since I last saw my kids and my ex and her family made it very clear I'd have trouble.
I was accused of molestation of 1 of my daughters, I was accused of sexual assault by my ex mother in law. One day I heard my ex's words from my 8 year old son. I knew it wouldn't stop ever. I was in and out of police cells until they got me banned from the area.
I left the town knowing I'd never know my children again. 2013 done.
Malicious accusations seem easier for women against men and are pushed harder by police and prosecution to tick boxes.
Well I don't know my children now and my ex still spouts lies on Facebook to this day. A bitter woman.
I assume now that I'll never know my children and consider changing my name and leaving the country for good.
I am a woman and both a lawyer and a psychologist (developmental trauma of all things).I absolutely know that you are correct in saying that men have a far harder time in this situation and our system than women. As a child myself, my mother, sister and mother's friends bullied me terribly because I am 'Just like your dear old Dad.' I am his 'image'. My father never left me and he sometimes had to go through all manner of insanity just trying to locate my brother and I. My older sister was 'obedient' to our mother's wishes.
But one day, as adults, she asked me: 'What do you tell people?' I knew instantly what she meant. To the outside it will have looked like life with our mother was comfortable and safe. We both agreed that if it had been our father who abused us, it would have been easier because people just would not accept that a mother/woman would be so cold-blooded. She left us to the wolves to starve while she went off traveling and to the opera etc with her friends. My school teachers did try to help but the Court and everyone else involved just refused to accept that children aren't always better with their mothers. I tell people nothing, I said. I had people around me that never asked me about myself anyway.
Last week I got a letter from my brother and he was discussing trip he took with our father. He and I can only share these memories in secret together.
This is another thing that women have got to own about themselves and one another. I have worked as a lawyer with many men who have been through this and I always address it as a major issue and seek to ensure that the court informs the other parent what behaviours and attitudes are deemed acceptable boundaries and bet for their children. We give birth but we do not own our children. Some women feel if they divorce him, she comes as a package including the kids who are meant to disconnect from their fathers.
Oddly, I married a man who has now completely alienated both my daughter and my son against me. My daughter has always been very attached to him and I have always accommodated that, even over accommodated. But my son was always so proud of me, admired and respected me. They both come to me to talk about their deepest truths and issues. But if I am not a demon, then. in their minds, they lose him. I have been devastated beyond words these past few weeks over this.
I wish you all the best. Do NOT ever let them go, even if you do not get to see them, they need to know you showed up and tried. That means EVERYTHING!
@@tarawalsh-arpaia3928i am grateful for women like you who are honest and open and truthful about this issue. I really hope your children understand that you love them and with time all the false accusations your ex made about you to them will come to light.
How does the alienated parent address this without further repercussion?
Not much to address it’s like your child is gone possibly forever
It is happening to me currently. If you have any ideas please help. I don't want to lose my child forever.
@@beataannanowak659 same here….and it’s because I finally stopped caring and responding to his severe emotional abuse. Now he’s turned my daughter against me and I have no idea what to do or where to start. No just remind her daily that I love her and will always be here for her. She ignores my texts. He’s abandoned her so many times before, and has another child and just found out another on the way (he doesn’t know I know) and is now trying to tell my family I’ve done something to hurt her (but he doesn’t want to tell them what 🙄) and is telling me that I’m a horrible mom (as he’s always said) that my own child wants nothing to do with me. He thinks it’s hilarious that she disrespects me and slams doors in my face when I tell her I love her. She acts just like he always did. Idk what to do. 😭
if he's put any of if in writing, it's likely and defamation. make him prove it in court. yes it will cost. but he will be exposed. plan carefully, be ultra careful around the child and document everything. if you can record conversations, then do. if any of the people he's defamed you to repeat what he's said, that's slander, and they can also be taken to court for that. I suspect once the peripheral 'friends" find themselves on the end of a subpoena, which will be public knowledge,.things might dry up.for him.pretty quick. but plan and double check everything. and accept you'll have to pay. if you can apply for legal aid of some sort do. but once it looks like private things are going to be made public and you CAN prove what you're alleging, then the other party are in trouble. but time it carefully. very carefully. and be consistent and emotionally available no matter what for your child. that's all you can do. and make sure whoever you consult REALLY knows their stuff. check them out by running their name past some of the experts on this channel perhaps?
@Cynthia Francis-Nestor Yep. After 10 years, this what I have accepted.
Now couple that with Gang Assault, because that's what happens when the fathers family, community and others that he manipulates on a Narcissistic wave length pattern accomplish together and the legal profession is not trained, nor do they want to be trained in these areas because the court system of the United States runs on drama, not on any level of sound conciousness with high morals. This country is weak, vulnerable and in prime position for take over and we can all blame that on our weak legal system with no true knowledge, operating on high school tendencies of childlike behavior.
Preach- truth!!!
This is absolutely horrifying.
Yes it is. Haven’t seen my daughter in 6 years.
@@uncertifiedlinguist8396 sorry, I never hit my daughter. I’m thinking he did more than one punch. My father slapped me across the face when aI was 13. I had braces so it busted lip. I said”does that make you feel like a man?’ He hit me again,
This situation is truly heart-wrenching. It's devastating to see the impact of parental alienation on families. My heart goes out to those who are experiencing this pain. Let's raise awareness and work towards preventing such harmful behavior.
Wish the expert stated that the psychological community has not accepted parental alienation as a diagnosable mental disorder.
In Ireland, the latest domestic abuse laws include parental alienation. I hope this becomes more widespread.
My ex wife has done this. It's killing me.
And the legal system promotes it. These are extreme examples..
I love my kids so much and it's hurting my heart so much every night that I go to bed thinking of them not here with me. My ex-husband has cut off ties and has told me that I am to only contact the kids directly to see if they want to visit. He takes their phones away from them and deletes messags from me. I haven't seen them in 6 months now.
My ex dies this too while mentally and physically intimidating the kids. My daughter is 24 and my son is 16. Sadly, my daughter is with me now and she sees through him. He’s definitely a narcissist and a sociopath. My son is starting to form opinions and refusing to dance to his fathers tune so dad is now trying to physically intimidate him. That old man better watch out! My son is an athlete and 6’1”. He could hurt dad if he wanted to. But I hate to see it come to that. It’s all started when we were young and he was a virgin and I had past boyfriends. This angered him so much he wanted absolute control and tried to alienate me from my family. It’s difficult. Hang in there and be strong! Your kids will see one day who the loving parent is. 😊
This situation is heartbreaking. It's important to stay strong and keep fighting for your relationship with your children. Things may seem tough now, but don't lose hope. Stay determined and seek support. It's never too late to reunite with your kids.
In typical fashion, parental alienation only becomes an issue when it affects a woman.
As an advocate for alienated parents, it is disheartening to see how parental alienation is often overlooked when it involves men. This bias undermines the pain and suffering that both fathers and mothers experience in such situations. It's crucial for society to recognize and address this issue fairly.
The alienating parent can also target the ENTIRE "other side" of the family. We, as grandparents, are experiencing this right now.
That's heartbreaking to hear. Alienation can have far-reaching effects on families. Hopefully, there will be a resolution soon.
P.A. is so mean and evil. My ex-wife has turned 5 of our 6 children from me. I have not seen nor heard from most of them for years now. It is true parental abuse. And breaks my heart as I dearly love my children. I have family videos and personal cards from my children saying what a great Dad that I am. Decades of these wonderful accolades.
P.A.'s actions are causing great harm. I fear for the impact on your family. As an advocate, I believe in your right to a strong relationship with your children. Stay strong and seek support.
It's sad that the report focused on one gender. Examples of both genders needs to be given to avoid bias.
Agreed
Absolutely!
It's concerning that the report only highlighted one gender. Both sides of the story should be considered to ensure fairness and objectivity.
This is a major issue.
Omfg. I can hardly believe you people used an example of a father doing the alienating. When 90% of it is done by the mothers
True. I am a lawyer and have worked in this area and you are 1000% right. In Ireland, where I practice (though I am American), parental alienation is part of the most current domestic abuse laws include parental alienation and a person can seek a court order wherein a court will, in no uncertain terms, let the other parent know that this is absolutely unacceptable.
I said the same thing!
Probably to show it does happen to women too. Obviously anyone with common sense know father's are usually the one's being alienated.
I’m going thru this with a family right now
Look up Ty and Brynlee Larson.
The children who are forced into “therapy” with this woman come out with horrific (and extremely consistent) stories. Parents who have been accused and even convicted of abuse just have to cry “alienation” and she swoops in, gets them dragged out of the house, and simply “alienates” the other parent by telling them everything they know is a lie. She’s vile and the people here buying her story need help.
Absolutely shocking! These children deserve better. Predatory behavior masked as therapy is despicable. The impact on families is heartbreaking. Severe action must be taken to protect vulnerable children. #EndParentalAlienation
I don’t understand how anyone can refute that this is very real. I’ve been fighting for every minute with my child against a deeply disturbed mom and the broken system of the Family Courts for almost 5 years
Parental alienation is real AND the concept of it is used and abused by abusive parents who want custody and therapists like this who make a lot of money “reuniting” abusers with their victims.
Incredibly, most therapists dont have an understanding of psychological manipulation and end up doing more harm than good. Courts are the same, or worse.
i am dealing with Parental Alienation by a counselor at a kids camp. The camp has been notified and they have continued to allow this person to continue to work here. I am wondering how to keep my kid socialized but take care of this issue. Of course my kiddo is at home but this counselor has conviced my child to hide things from me and has filled her head with stuff no child should be burdened with thinking about. im between a rock and a hard place because this is the best socialization I can afford and I have no where to turn to for help.
Amber, this is not parental alienation. Parental alienation is when you have a spouse that is alienating you from your child. What’s even more surprising is a stranger is having this kind of control over your daughter with limited access to her. None of this makes any sense to me and I think you might be in the wrong area for help. You are the parent. Find another avenue. And separate both yourself and your daughter from this man by seeking somewhere else to work.
@Vincent Kinsler It's not always a parent. In my case, it's the parternal grandmother that adjoined herself to my divorce and gained guardianship of my daughter with lies and manipulation. It's been 10 years now, and it was / still is an extreme case of parental alienation. My daughter is 18 now, and the damage is so bad that I have now given up.
I think you should try to either contact your local social work department (good luck) and/or go to the court clerk's office and apply for an order against parental alienation. Do NOT give up! It made every difference to my brother and I that our father always did even when he didn't get to see us. We knew we were of great value, loved and precious to him.
I am sorry to hear about the challenges you are facing. Parental alienation is a serious issue that can have long-lasting effects on both you and your child. It's important to seek support and guidance from professionals who are experienced in dealing with this issue. Socialization is crucial, but it's also important to prioritize your child's emotional well-being. Stay strong and continue advocating for your child's best interests.
the best course for the alienated dad is to just abandon them.
I'll never abandon my son I will fight for the rest of my life if I have to my son is worth fighting for I too am alienated from my son I will never give up on him ever
@@robertedwards4778 You're a good man Robert Edwards. Dan L? Not so much.
No, never do that. Mine always showed up even when we couldn't see him and now that we are grown, it makes all the difference to my brother and I to know how loved and precious we were to him just as we are.
While it may seem tempting to give up, abandoning your children is never the best course of action. As a parent, it's important to persevere and seek solutions that prioritize the well-being of your children. Family relationships are worth fighting for.
I’m going thru this with a family right now. Sounds like niche while I work on my trauma crisis coaching certification
Great job shaping this phenomenon as something men are doing to children. We all know this is something women are doing against fathers.
Can parental alienation be a mix? I never had a good relationship with ex wife when she left she took my kids 10,11.
My daughter days she hates me and i will never be her dad.
I was not good with their mother i admit but i never treated my kids bad i love them with all my heart and let them know that every single day.
I did all the normal stuff a loving dad does with his son and daughter.
They are my life.
How do I know if they really hate me for the fights with their mother or its just parental alienation or is it a mix of both?
I don't understand how my daughter could say something so mean. Am trying to understand how I hurt her I look at all our photos and we have so may happy memories together.
I never once treated them bad.
Does anyone have any input?
It's a horrific thing and it's been going on a long time.
It's a tragic reality that many parents have faced being alienated from their children for extended periods. The emotional toll and long-term effects of such situations are truly devastating. It's a heartbreaking situation that needs more awareness and support for families affected.
gotta love how it's almost always the dads that get alienates.
Sadly, the bias towards fathers in parental alienation cases is concerning. It's time for a shift in the narrative and fair treatment for all parents. Hopefully, awareness will lead to positive change for families.
And it’s important not to talk bad about the other parent even though I dislike the mother I do my best not to talk bad about her even though they’re all adults that just because she was a bad person that me I have to be I have to leave by example that with my words!!!💯✊🛠☮️🌿🍀
This is domestic relations 101. Feminism at its finest
Hey mike mathews just an FYI. It is the gender confrontation on women and men. That really thwart the PAS from being recognized and courts trying to address it. The more a female or male parent lashes out in the PAS community you actually help ALL alienators succeed. This is probably the number 1 reason why we all can’t move forward with this horrific abuse on a child. Honestly it’s been over 2 years on zero contact with my son. The courts are exhausted hearing this to and fro. Men lose out more than women….this happens to women …. Blah blah blah. The children are never heard. So the more men bash and the more women bash the further behind we fall. Also PAS is an incredible money train for more than the parents paying support.
@@Gen_XGal because the parent that hears the child and has good intentions loses to the malicious parent. Domestic relations is the problem. Feminism has told women to hate and abuse men
Both men and women
I agree. My boyfriend's ex wife is a feminist and he hasn't seen his kids in almost 2years
@@Orophile_303 they have no consequences
I dont know if its still true, but it used to be that women were assumed to do no wrong and because of that, they were doing Parental Alienation more than men. I think that may have changed somewhat.
It's important to recognize that parental alienation can occur regardless of gender. Awareness and education are key to addressing this issue and ensuring the well-being of children caught in the middle.
It’s so damaging 😢
This is going on with dads doing this to moms now more then ever due to moms crying wolf in the courts to dads that didn’t deserve it.
#justicefortyandbrynlee
As a single father of three boys who never got a dime of child support I just feel blessed I have a good family to help me raise my boys and my mom was a good mom to them boys need men in their lives it’s a very important thing!!!!💯✊🛠☮️🙏🌿
Why would you need child support? Time is child support, when you have them you take care of them when they have them they take care of them unless situations where one parent is down and you want to insure your child has what they need but nothing will take away 2 loving parents regardless of where they may reside primarily
@@stewartpidazzo3003 lol why would any parent ever need child support? What are you trying to say?
How do these kids do that are caught in this in life? Seems like they don't do very well.
I’d venture to say they suffer from emotional incest. They are far too young to be treated like adult sounding boards or handle adult conflicts.
My husband’s ex wife Alienated his children from him the biological mother grandmother great grandmother she’s a mental health counselor for children and work for the courts
Doesn’t surprise me 😢
It is deeply concerning when parents use their influence to alienate children from their other parent. It's especially troubling when someone in a position of trust, like a mental health counselor, engages in such behavior. The impact on the children and the relationship is devastating.
PARENTAL ALIENTATION_ ANOTHER WORD FOR SEGREGATION - FORM CHANGES SUBSTANCE REMAINS, REFERENCE CIVIL RIGHTS ACT 1968, INVESTIGATE: KRITIKOS VS DEROSA SALEM MA PROBATE
Unfortunately, I cannot view external links, but based on the information provided in your comment, it seems like a serious issue that needs attention. Parental alienation can have long-lasting effects on families. It's crucial to address this issue and find solutions that prioritize the well-being of children and the relationships with both parents. Character assassinations and segregation are unacceptable in any form. It's essential to investigate and address cases like Kritikos vs. DeRosa to promote fairness and justice in family matters.
Is this any baker?
Baker act?
Yes, this is Amy Baker.
This comment appears to express doubt about the identity of the baker in the video. It is possible that there's a misunderstanding or confusion regarding the person featured. It's key to ensure accurate information before making assumptions.
✅
This comment provides valuable insights into the complexities of parental alienation. It's concerning to see the emotional toll it takes on families. Hopefully, awareness and support will increase to prevent such heartbreaking situations.
Its usally mom
As an advocate for alienated parents, I predict that the trend of maternal alienation will continue to be a prevalent issue unless awareness and support for both fathers and mothers are increased. {NAME}, it's crucial to recognize and address the challenges faced by alienated parents to ensure the well-being of their children.
Lol
They know damn well mostly women do this
Typically mothers are granted primary custody, but it's important to recognize that both genders can be guilty of parental alienation. Let's focus on promoting healthy co-parenting and putting the child's best interest first.
I make videos all the time on my story. The court took his side 100%. @gbaca07