HOW TO MAKE A BIG DECISION When You’re TORN AF 😫

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  • Опубліковано 27 тра 2019
  • Learn the 5 steps I take to make hard decisions more clear by first figuring out my values, goals, and needs around the choice.
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    Figuring out how to make a BIG decision when you’re seriously stuck between a rock and a hard place requires more than a quick trick or sorting out emotions vs logic. Sometimes the crossroads is gonna hurt either way. Sometimes even good things require painful sacrifices. How do you choose then?
    There’s a process I use that goes beyond objectivity to make murky choices clearer and allows you to make better decisions (not to be confused with EASY decisions), without having to choose between your head and your heart. This is about aligning them BOTH by examining your values, goals, and needs.
    So if you’re struggling to make the right choice?
    Set some time aside for this one.
    And if you think you don’t have time to set aside?
    Just look at the time being siphoned away by your indecision and stress.
    No, this isn’t a fluffy, “quick fix” answer.
    (Sorry. I wish those existed too.)
    There’s rarely one simple hack to make the best decision.
    Unless your decision itself is simpler than you’re giving it credit.
    Making hard decisions you won’t regret later means making time to sort through what ACTUALLY matters.
    I’ll tell you what I tell myself: suck it up buttercup.
    You can do this.
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    I’m Tara Wagner, Belief Breakthrough coach with almost a decade of experience helping women overcome their limiting beliefs. I teach female entrepreneurs struggling with the work/life juggling act how to overcome Imposter Syndrome and overwhelm, so they can actually execute on all those ideas and plans they keep coming up with, and finally scale their businesses WITHOUT scaling their stress. #crushyourgoalsnotyoursoul
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    Other things this video is about: making hard decisions, how to make tough decisions, how to make a decision you won’t regret later,yoga,spirituality,wisdom,decision,hard decisions, how to make hard decisions, how to know if you’re making the right decision, alignment
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КОМЕНТАРІ • 200

  • @TaraWagner
    @TaraWagner  5 років тому +9

    YOUR TURN! What tips do you have on how to make a BIG decision? P.S. Be sure to jump on my free training, “How to Use a Holistic Approach to Create a Profitable Business Without Burning Yourself Out”. Learn more and reserve a seat here: xotara.us/training

    • @ICUsmile33
      @ICUsmile33 3 роки тому

      I need help on trying to figure out if should move to another state with siblings because in of health benefits. But my bf doesn't want to move from his family in Colorado. I don't know what to do. Can you help me

    • @TaraWagner
      @TaraWagner  3 роки тому +1

      Have you gone through the process in the video? I’d recommend doing it together.

  • @starcatcher3691
    @starcatcher3691 2 роки тому +19

    I am at a BIG crossroads and I find it very painful. I can't decide and driving others crazy as well.

    • @TaraWagner
      @TaraWagner  2 роки тому

      I hope this process helps!

    • @articusam9866
      @articusam9866 Рік тому

      me too :(

    • @candyhumpf6267
      @candyhumpf6267 4 місяці тому

      I know this comment is deer. But I feel this . I see every scenario And I go over all of them and mans everyone else confused . It’s awful !

  • @user-ub5zn9on2v
    @user-ub5zn9on2v 4 роки тому +41

    “Crush your goals not your soul” I like that !

  • @melissapinkgwinner1731
    @melissapinkgwinner1731 3 роки тому +9

    I’m physically sick to my stomach from anxiety! I have a huge decision to make about my business but my gut tells me to cut my loses and go home!

    • @TaraWagner
      @TaraWagner  3 роки тому +1

      I’m sending you hugs! I’ve actually been there. And I’ll tell you, it’s NOT always a guy that tells us that. My advice would be to find a trusted mentor for outside perspective. (You’re welcome to email me if you don’t have someone.)

    • @melissapinkgwinner1731
      @melissapinkgwinner1731 3 роки тому +1

      @@TaraWagner I don’t so what is your email

    • @TaraWagner
      @TaraWagner  3 роки тому +1

      hi@xotara.us :)

  • @gabecox
    @gabecox 5 років тому +10

    I love the idea of listing out our values and figuring out which decision best lines up with them. Once we make the decision, it’s important not to waver. We have to be ok with what we decide and continue living from there, especially when either decision would be just fine.

    • @TaraWagner
      @TaraWagner  5 років тому +1

      Red Hot Mindset oh glad you added that! It’s easy to let doubt creep back in but never helpful. 😆

  • @amelieg3007
    @amelieg3007 Місяць тому

    This was SO useful for me. I'm an expat who has spent more than 20+ years outside of my home country, and was stuck between the choice to keep living the expat life or go back home to be closer to my family and friends. Doing the board exercise and listing values, goals, options and needs was really insightful. To see it all written down especially helps. It also helped me to think a little outside the box, that there isn't just option A & option B but maybe other options.
    Overall it helped me a lot in my decision process so thank you very much for sharing. Just discovered your channel and love your energy!

    • @TaraWagner
      @TaraWagner  Місяць тому

      I'm so glad to hear this! Kudos on doing the process!

  • @Brenduh03
    @Brenduh03 3 роки тому +12

    I wish someone would just make my decision for me and know that it's the best one.

    • @TaraWagner
      @TaraWagner  3 роки тому +2

      I think we'd all love that. I want mine in the form of a magic wand - or a magic 8 ball! LOL

    • @billiemariepashia6610
      @billiemariepashia6610 2 роки тому

      Brenda what are you deciding about. Maybe it will help me

  • @MarleyJaxx
    @MarleyJaxx 5 років тому +2

    Than you for this and being so open to sharing your story!

    • @TaraWagner
      @TaraWagner  5 років тому

      Marley Baird Media glad you enjoyed it Marley!

  • @ToryDelury
    @ToryDelury 3 роки тому

    Great video, thanks!

  • @deeplyliving4443
    @deeplyliving4443 5 років тому +3

    yesssss so helpful thank you! I ALWAYS have a difficult time making decisions, my anxiety always gets the best of me and its very overwhelming! I'm going to try these tips though, thank you!

    • @TaraWagner
      @TaraWagner  5 років тому

      That's awesome to hear! Let me know how they work out for you. ❤

  • @jonash226
    @jonash226 2 роки тому +3

    If only life were so simple we would all be rich

    • @TaraWagner
      @TaraWagner  2 роки тому +1

      There is so much out there that makes it feel like it’s simple and sometimes it is; sometimes we know exactly what we need to do and we just don’t want to do it, but sometimes it’s not so cut and dry. I’m not going to promise that this process is going to be easy or simple or fast, there are no quick fixes in life.

  • @elainecleosocorro9053
    @elainecleosocorro9053 4 роки тому

    I'm so glad I found this channel and this awesome video. Thanks Tara! I'm currently facing a tough career choice and this has been so helpful.

  • @hafitalnmr8192
    @hafitalnmr8192 3 роки тому +6

    Hey, such a great video, I just got started working on my own process to make a tough decision, yet I still don't know how much time I have, it's unbelievable challenging one. Thanks a lot you helped to begin a good start points, And don't forget people watching you all over. Hafit's here living in China.

  • @jonseror5350
    @jonseror5350 4 роки тому +1

    This was really great, thank you so much for sharing this video, it helped me a lot!

    • @TaraWagner
      @TaraWagner  4 роки тому

      I’m glad to hear that! Good luck with your decision!

  • @GabrielaLopez-cn8qm
    @GabrielaLopez-cn8qm 4 роки тому +5

    What a great video! I'm in the middle of making an important work decision where I felt very confused and hesitant. Following your strategy has made me work on it differently. Thank you!

    • @GabrielaLopez-cn8qm
      @GabrielaLopez-cn8qm 4 роки тому

      I'll be going for the job which gives me family time, self time, passion and enables me to do good for others. I will work on establishing an honest and transparent communication with the team.

    • @TaraWagner
      @TaraWagner  4 роки тому

      This sounds like a beautiful opportunity! 😍 Congrats on making the right decision for yourself!

  • @lukeanddaleigh
    @lukeanddaleigh 3 роки тому +1

    Rewatching this video and taking notes. Just subscribed!

    • @TaraWagner
      @TaraWagner  3 роки тому

      Good luck on your decision! You got this. 💪🏻

  • @jaye.beauty
    @jaye.beauty 2 роки тому

    Really needed this today. Thank you so much for the time you put into making this video. Very detailed and so helpful! Thank you!!!

    • @TaraWagner
      @TaraWagner  2 роки тому

      I'm glad you enjoyed it! How do you hope to use this decision process? I'm so curious to know! :)

  • @whoisappie
    @whoisappie 5 років тому +2

    Thank you for sharing your personal story! I am on a point in my life where I need to make some hard choices... but in my situation I think it's more about letting go of fear and taking the risk, I think I know what I need to do... But obviously there are some desirable aspects to the other choice... this video is helpful :)

    • @TaraWagner
      @TaraWagner  5 років тому

      appie aahhh aren’t those times fun? I would def still go thru the values/goals part and then the “how can I do this in a way that aligns and makes it a bit more enjoyable”. Good luck to you!

  • @familyoflove4224
    @familyoflove4224 3 роки тому

    Thank You Tara.
    I spent the late night trying to work on big decision.
    Your guidance helps eliminate a lot of unnecessary worry and detail.
    Thank You 🙏

  • @Virgo2the9s
    @Virgo2the9s 3 роки тому

    Thank you! I was close this helped me overcome my fear and decide.

  • @starry_config
    @starry_config 3 роки тому

    This was a fantastic video. I definitely see why this method requires time to process and build, but I can already start to see things in a way I wasn’t seeing before from just one go. Thank you!!!!

    • @TaraWagner
      @TaraWagner  3 роки тому

      I’m so glad to hear it’s helping!

  • @joannakhoury9636
    @joannakhoury9636 4 роки тому

    Thank you for this nice video, i didn't try it but it looks great

    • @TaraWagner
      @TaraWagner  4 роки тому +1

      Thanks Joanna! I hope you'll give it a shot. After all, what's the point of reading the cookbook if you won't make the recipes, right? Only one will fill your belly. ;)

  • @nicolekatsikides9787
    @nicolekatsikides9787 5 місяців тому

    This really helped us to make a major decision. We applied the method and were able to get to a decision. I’m very grateful for this. Thank you.

    • @TaraWagner
      @TaraWagner  5 місяців тому

      So glad to hear this!

  • @urushi9370
    @urushi9370 3 роки тому

    Your channel needs to blow up! Such high quality content !

  • @billiemariepashia6610
    @billiemariepashia6610 3 роки тому +1

    I really am agonizing about this . I have to decide tonight.

    • @TaraWagner
      @TaraWagner  3 роки тому

      I hope the process helps. ❤️

  • @ricardodeguinon2173
    @ricardodeguinon2173 Рік тому

    I love the idea OF clear but difficult. I truly appreciate you decision of empowering us. Keep it up . I truly appreciate it.

  • @samonamission_
    @samonamission_ 3 роки тому +5

    Thank you. 😇 I really liked these tips! In particular the last: What can you do to improve the remaining options? That step might eliminate a lot of remaining resistance. 🙌
    Question: What's your process for a speed decision? I only had 2 days for a really high stakes decision this week. I wish I saw your video in advance. I kind of feel I made the wrong decision... But I was so startled I couldn't even think of a structured process. Leaving me with less clarity than in advance. Which is why I'm searching for hind sight clarity now 😉 To improve my process for next time.

    • @TaraWagner
      @TaraWagner  3 роки тому +1

      Glad it was useful! In terms of on the spot decisions, I do everything I can to not have to make it, even if it upsets people. I will take time out to just process as much as I can and then listen to my gut (versus my emotions - tricky though). This process you could easily do on a scratch sheet of paper on the fly. It just comes down to - “what are my goals and values? Does this align with those and with who I wish to be?”

  • @JTodd-zn6ty
    @JTodd-zn6ty 5 років тому

    Just found your channel from Gillian Perkins! I am really enjoying watching your videos! Thanks!

    • @TaraWagner
      @TaraWagner  5 років тому +1

      Fun and Effective Dog Training welcome! Looking forward to getting to know you!

  • @dianneguilfoyle4003
    @dianneguilfoyle4003 3 роки тому

    Hi Tara, Thanks for this video. I am facing a huge decision with no happy ending in sight. My husband has found work three states away and wants to go to Texas and I have kids here in Calif and NV that I don't want to leave. (They are all in their late 30's and early 40's) I feel that the right thing to do would be to follow my husband but my heart is not in it at all. There is much much more to it than that but the hard decision is still there.

    • @TaraWagner
      @TaraWagner  3 роки тому

      Sending you hugs. Have you gone thru the whole process in the vid yet? Let me know how it helps. Your happy ending exists. You might just get to be surprised by it. ❤️

  • @dearkappy
    @dearkappy Рік тому

    Found your channel from a Marie Forleo video. Subscribed at “Crush your goals not your soul”. Currently making a career change and this is my main focus. Doing things again but better.

    • @TaraWagner
      @TaraWagner  Рік тому

      Thanks for subbing! What kind of change are you working on?

  • @lukeanddaleigh
    @lukeanddaleigh 3 роки тому

    Choices ❤

  • @marystravellife
    @marystravellife 4 роки тому +18

    This is a great video! I’m trying to make a decision between staying in Europe and study here or move back to the US and study there. Covid and the current political situation is what made me rethink the US plan and i’m trying to decide since days now... i’m feeling terrible but this video gave me hope! i’m taking my time now to do all of the steps.

    • @TaraWagner
      @TaraWagner  4 роки тому +1

      Good luck to you!

    • @GeographicallyFree
      @GeographicallyFree 3 роки тому

      What did you decide?

    • @marystravellife
      @marystravellife 3 роки тому +4

      @@GeographicallyFree to move to the US ☺️

    • @topsy-turvy9167
      @topsy-turvy9167 3 роки тому

      @@marystravellife give me some tips I also want to decide between where to live ~ but I don't know what facters to look for

    • @marystravellife
      @marystravellife 3 роки тому

      @@topsy-turvy9167 which are the places you’re considering?

  • @bpd_is_not_me5750
    @bpd_is_not_me5750 4 роки тому

    Thank you for sharing 🙏 I’m currently stuck between a rock and a hard place myself right now! I’ve recently met this guy who isn’t like anyone I’ve ever been with before he genuinely likes me and isn’t pushy or anything and so kind which are all opposites to the experiences I’ve had with men and my whole life men have hurt me so it’s been hard to meet anyone so meeting him is a big thing because about 2 years ago I started getting help for prescription pill addiction anyway long story short I finally have a chance to go away for a couple weeks to get the drugs and stuff out of my system and I’m scared cuz he has no idea about the addiction or mental health cuz I’m on substitutes now so I’m not stoned or anything but don’t want to be on these substitutes for the rest of my life! It feels like a really tough choice as I don’t want to move him but I know this would be a good opportunity for me. Thanks 🙏

    • @TaraWagner
      @TaraWagner  4 роки тому

      If there’s one thing I’ve learned it’s that a good man loves us for our “imperfections” as well as our best selves. Trust your intuition. You’ll know when it’s the right time to have that convo. ❤️

  • @andrewmass1414
    @andrewmass1414 Рік тому

    Will try a big whiteboard. Thank you.

    • @TaraWagner
      @TaraWagner  Рік тому

      I do love my whiteboard! But paper works too, of course. :)

  • @misty4048
    @misty4048 Рік тому

    I had a tough decision where I had to choose from a pc or an xbox as my gaming system and after watching this I know what I am going to do.

  • @whenearthspeaks
    @whenearthspeaks 2 роки тому

    Why does this not have more thumbs up!? Excellent process, I'm going to use right now with scratch paper. Thumbs up here, and new sub, looks like you have a lot of videos I will like. Thank you for this video, so very helpful!!

    • @TaraWagner
      @TaraWagner  2 роки тому

      I'm so glad it was helpful. If you enjoyed this vid you might also enjoy this one: ua-cam.com/video/xcITLXRGAjk/v-deo.html
      Welcome to the channel - I can't wait for you to dive in!

  • @candyhumpf6267
    @candyhumpf6267 4 місяці тому

    Currently have a decision to make that I’m stuck!! Neither is life threatening.. idk why it’s hard.

    • @TaraWagner
      @TaraWagner  4 місяці тому +1

      Big decisions are usually hard because we have way more beneath the surface trying to inform the decision than just the decision itself. Sometimes it's a fear of unintended consequences, or what others might think, or any number of things. It might be helpful to sit and journal it all out (maybe for many days in a row) to see what surfaces for you!

    • @candyhumpf6267
      @candyhumpf6267 4 місяці тому

      @@TaraWagner thank you 🙏 half the battle is my overthinking brain.., splits everything in s million veins. Hate it !

  • @lukeanddaleigh
    @lukeanddaleigh 3 роки тому

    Hey Tara! I just searched for videos about making a big decision and found your channel.
    Interesting that you currently live in Florida. My husband and I live in Oklahoma and have for most of our lives, but are currently in Florida for a week long working job interview. We just can't figure out if moving or staying would be in our best interest because they both have pros and cons. I was thinking today I would make a pros and cons list.

    • @TaraWagner
      @TaraWagner  3 роки тому +1

      I hope you follow the process I outline in the video! It’s a great addition to a pros/cons list!

    • @lukeanddaleigh
      @lukeanddaleigh 3 роки тому

      @@TaraWagner Yes, I believe the process in your video will help us out a lot. We'll start working on that today. Thank you!

  • @snorfallupagus6014
    @snorfallupagus6014 11 місяців тому

    You people crack me up.

    • @TaraWagner
      @TaraWagner  11 місяців тому

      Then my job here is done. 😂

  • @user-oi1ez6rz8g
    @user-oi1ez6rz8g 3 роки тому +2

    i just want to sleep and avoid making the decisions

  • @whiteblack5533
    @whiteblack5533 3 роки тому

    I am currently in dentistry 5thyear, I'm torn apart if I should transfer back to my home country due to covid.
    The uni I'm in have no clear graduation date its free for all if u can finish the requirement u can grad but the system is full of redtape might be there 2might be yearsbefire I graduate.....the fee is cheap.
    My home country is more expensive and I need to redo my 3rd year which mean i will have another 3years. But the graduation is clear and the system is a lot better then the uni I'm in.
    Any advice?

    • @TaraWagner
      @TaraWagner  3 роки тому

      What’s your long term goal and what are your biggest values for your life and work?

  • @lelagill4923
    @lelagill4923 2 роки тому +2

    Who else is in their early 20s and lost asf trying to scour UA-cam for life advice 🙋🏽‍♀️

    • @TaraWagner
      @TaraWagner  2 роки тому +1

      I hear you on this one!!! It can be tough finding exactly what you need on the internet. Sometimes figuring out how to make a big decision is hard because we know what we need to do, but we’re just afraid to do it. But sometimes we are legit stuck between a rock and a hard place and the choice is just not clear. May the right video for what you need most surface at the right time for you. I hope you found this video helpful. What topics are you hoping to learn more about?

    • @lesleymay6757
      @lesleymay6757 Рік тому

      I'm 43 and currently confused AF on whether to buy a home for my son and I, or to stay and work things out with my mate. He has some anger issues and I need to decide what to do. Clock is ticking.

  • @mierypesado6740
    @mierypesado6740 3 роки тому +3

    Some friendly feedback: You're a naturally charismatic speaker and make some great points - I just thought this was a much longer vid than need be. I'm not saying it should be a 30 second tornado, but the same could be communicated with concision in 6-7 minutes, and I daresay your audience would be the better for it (easier to remember the most important points).
    Thanks for the video

    • @TaraWagner
      @TaraWagner  3 роки тому

      Thanks! Do you make videos yourself? If so you know it’s easier said than done!

    • @mierypesado6740
      @mierypesado6740 3 роки тому

      @@TaraWagner Nope, consumer not a creator

  • @waynelast1685
    @waynelast1685 2 роки тому

    I am in a HUGE conflict right now. My decision it seems will hurt one of two people and it breaks my heart terribly. Not just emotionally hurt them but it will affect their lives also in a financial and supportive way. I did not do it intentionally. I had a plan but then life changed the situation and now I am stuck big time.

    • @TaraWagner
      @TaraWagner  2 роки тому

      Big decisions can be really challenging! I’m not going to promise that this process is going to be easy or simple or fast, there are no quick fixes and it would be condescending to assume that the decision that you’re making could be made that easily. I hope that this process helps you in your decision-making. Best of luck! :)

  • @fantasia243645
    @fantasia243645 3 роки тому

    I currently on this decision to choose between two jobs and potentially moving. However, a micromanaging co-worker left so I for real don't know what to do.

    • @TaraWagner
      @TaraWagner  3 роки тому

      Good luck with the process!

  • @lukeanddaleigh
    @lukeanddaleigh 3 роки тому

    Oh yes, your mindset is so important going into a big decision.

  • @julie2404
    @julie2404 3 роки тому

    I dont see a follow up video to the decision you made. Im just curious how it all worked out. I'm stuck between a similar issue. love lives out of state and have tried to move there and then i miss my kids and parents in home state. I feel guilt leaving my family and feel unsettled when i'm away from them however, i miss my love and want to make it work. i'm going to work on your suggestions today.

    • @TaraWagner
      @TaraWagner  3 роки тому

      We wound up making the move and as we did our son decided to move also. He traveled the country for about 6 months and then settled back in Vegas after all!

  • @FullmoonFang
    @FullmoonFang 2 роки тому

    Choosing a Master

  • @jamesgreaves3023
    @jamesgreaves3023 5 місяців тому

    I have to make a decision whether I go to Morocco to finalise a land settlement deal. I don't know if it is a fraudulent deal or not. The businessman who found the land has not disclosed the address but the court has apparently approved of my family's ownership. I have not got the court record despite asking for it. The businessman has purchased a return air ticket for me for this Saturday night, 27 January 2024!

    • @TaraWagner
      @TaraWagner  5 місяців тому +1

      Exciting! Hope it all goes better than expected

  • @AmericanEagle33333
    @AmericanEagle33333 Рік тому

    I'm doing these goals myself along with my children

  • @aswler
    @aswler 3 роки тому

    What a discovery! Your video provided more factors for me to consider before making a decision: leave an unsatisfying but well paid job and step into unknown uncertainty for a different one or remain?

    • @TaraWagner
      @TaraWagner  3 роки тому

      What decision have you landed on?

    • @aswler
      @aswler 3 роки тому

      @@TaraWagner Not yet. I have been procrastinating the urgent decision for days incl. partly sleepless nights. I have spent more than 10 years on that job and I do not have any job offer instead. That makes it more difficult. But I do not like returning to the office in covid times.

    • @TaraWagner
      @TaraWagner  3 роки тому +1

      It sounds like the misery of postponing the decision might be worse than the actual choice itself. ;)

  • @12danielmaster
    @12danielmaster 4 роки тому +2

    Im at a cross roads now! lol

    • @TaraWagner
      @TaraWagner  4 роки тому

      Good luck to you!! I hope this vid is helpful!

  • @harjotgurudatta
    @harjotgurudatta 3 роки тому +1

    I am at cross road. Currently mind and logic say that I am doing well, good money etc. Heart says that I should leave and settle outside my country

    • @TaraWagner
      @TaraWagner  3 роки тому

      Have you gone thru the process from the vid yet? Let me know where you land after you do.

    • @harjotgurudatta
      @harjotgurudatta 3 роки тому

      @@TaraWagner logic says that I am doing good where I am, though I am not satisfied with working conditions but rest all money family etc home ok. But I have seen German working conditions and that tempts me to settle outside my country. The process involves sacrificing 2 to 3 yrs of life in exams and moving out. On gbg through process, it suggests me to stay where I am. But isnt it getting caught in comfort zone?

    • @TaraWagner
      @TaraWagner  3 роки тому

      When you went thru the process, your long term goals, values, needs etc pointed to staying put? Did you take into account all of those needs? Because if you’re not satisfied that means there are values and needs not being met. Can you identify what those might be?

  • @marilynnstebbins78
    @marilynnstebbins78 Рік тому

    Thanks for this timely podcast. I am a senior widow, torn between a major life changing decision to possibly move far south, to a warm sunny climate to hopefully end lifelong,chronic health issues, or maybe need to stay local as one of my my grand kids is local and the other granddaughter is at the same latitude but on the west side of WA., closest to my B.C. roots ,friends and relatives. I have understood that one cannot heal in the same environment, one got sick in, but will I be too lonely, like all the other grandparent stories I have heard of, when grandparents move back to live near their grand kids? It is way more complicated than l I have already expressed so far!. My kids are not holding me back whatsoever as they would love to get away to some place warm in the winter,to visit me, but I am not sure if I will not be too lonely! My current new grandchild's parents also need to move in a few months, and that is making it even harder, as they are uncertain of their future plans, as well
    Thanks again. Hope to carry out your ideas ASAP.
    Marilynn

    • @TaraWagner
      @TaraWagner  Рік тому +1

      I feel for you Marilynn! Those kinds of moves are soooo hard. I hope this process helps you!

  • @Caitlynmallan
    @Caitlynmallan 3 роки тому

    My grandparents told me I could move in with them which would be useful for my mental health because I wont be around my step dad and I will feel less pressurized and more independent. however im scared my mom won't understand and do the same thing what my dad did to me and stopped talking to me. and regardless of moving helping with my mental health ill still need my medication and I don't think i would be covered once i move out of my moms.

    • @TaraWagner
      @TaraWagner  3 роки тому

      It sounds like you need to do some research on how you can continue to get the medication you need so you can do what’s best on ALL accounts.

    • @billiemariepashia6610
      @billiemariepashia6610 2 роки тому

      If I knew what state you lived in maybe I could help
      Find out about your meds.
      Some companies will send you free or low cost scripts. You just need to know what to do. You can
      Contact my email if I can help. No charge also I have ALOT of luck with finding this stuff ,But there are no
      Guarantees. But I will give it my honest try to help anyone I can.

  • @jessfox2459
    @jessfox2459 3 роки тому

    I'm trying to figure out if I stay at the uni I'm studying at right now or joining the military. I'm just a bit lost.

    • @TaraWagner
      @TaraWagner  3 роки тому

      Good luck as you go thru the process here! You’ve got this!

    • @jessfox2459
      @jessfox2459 3 роки тому

      @@TaraWagner I'm so glad I came across this video when I did. I will be at the end of the summer enlisting and hoping shipping off not long after.

    • @TaraWagner
      @TaraWagner  3 роки тому +1

      Kudos on making the decision! And thank you for your service!

    • @jessfox2459
      @jessfox2459 3 роки тому

      @@TaraWagner Thank you.

  • @sharonkrisanovski7097
    @sharonkrisanovski7097 3 роки тому +1

    Definitely stuck and have 2 days to decide 😆🤣😂

    • @TaraWagner
      @TaraWagner  3 роки тому

      What are your biggest questions still lingering?

  • @ryleelittau2797
    @ryleelittau2797 4 роки тому

    Im in the middle of making a discussion of weather or not I want to continue playing soccer or if I want to quit and focus on school. My parents want me to keep doing soccer because Im really good at it but I don’t have a passion for it. I feel like a disappointment to them and they are mad at me for even talking to this about them what should I do??

    • @TaraWagner
      @TaraWagner  4 роки тому

      Hey Rylee, this sounds like a tough decision for sure. Have you followed the process yet, especially if identifying YOUR goals and values, and then ALL the potential options? Be careful as you do that you don’t mix up anyone else’s goals and values with yours. (And yes, that’s easier said than done but important none the less.) Once you have clarity then you can have the conversation with your parents to share your values and goals and how (whatever you choose) aligns with those. Good luck to you. You’ve got this. 💪🏻

    • @ryleelittau2797
      @ryleelittau2797 4 роки тому

      Tara Wagner Coaching yes I definitely thought about myself in my decision and decided to keep playing because I have been playing for 12 years and I have a feeling it will get better thank you for the great advice

    • @TaraWagner
      @TaraWagner  4 роки тому

      That’s great! Kudos on making the decision!

  • @searchingfortruth5995
    @searchingfortruth5995 Рік тому

    I'm torn because I've been struggling to save money to relocate to a warmer climate with better opportunities. If I stay to seek treatment all my money saved will be absorbed and I wont be able to relocate. But recently I suspect I have cancer but I currently live in an area with low paying jobs and a cold ghost town cold community not friendly at all. Also winter lasts here for 7 to 8 months too long very depressing. Any positive feedback I would appreciate it.

    • @TaraWagner
      @TaraWagner  Рік тому

      Sending you (((hugs)))! Sometimes figuring out how to make a big decision is hard because we know what we need to do, but we’re just afraid to do it. But sometimes we are legit stuck between a rock and a hard place and the choice is just not clear. First things first...set aside sometime to think thoroughly through your big decision and secondly cultivate the right mindset to make the decision. I wish you the best of luck. :)

  • @bristlethistlethespy9356
    @bristlethistlethespy9356 3 роки тому +2

    Heyo, I am currently 15 years old. I turn 16 this year, and I need to choose a school (i dont really know the english school system that Well, but Its kinda like highschool I guess). I have the choice between applying for a boarding school far away from Where I live, which sounds super exciting, and cool, but at the same time...I dont want to leave my friends, family and a guy I’m kinda in a relationship with. We also have a highschool Where I live, but Its not a borading school..
    I dont really know What I should choose, can somebody please try to give me some advice, like a stranger just looking in, because I feel kinda locked to my perspective Now ❤️❤️

    • @TaraWagner
      @TaraWagner  3 роки тому

      Did you go thru the process I outline in the vid yet? Start there and let me know what you find.

    • @bristlethistlethespy9356
      @bristlethistlethespy9356 3 роки тому

      @@TaraWagner
      I think I might go with the school Where I live, cuz I can Get into a boarding school later...

  • @bjbbj292
    @bjbbj292 3 роки тому

    I am right now

  • @marcelletalksmma
    @marcelletalksmma 3 роки тому +1

    Can you people in the comment section help me make a decision? 👽 or 🦖
    Which one?

  • @tinymongy
    @tinymongy 2 роки тому

    I used this to go to a trampoline park

    • @TaraWagner
      @TaraWagner  2 роки тому

      Haha! Nice! Best decision yet!

  • @antonellahuron496
    @antonellahuron496 Рік тому

    So... I need to make a decision : stay in Paris where Ive lived for nearly 20 years but where I was never able to save money, let alone buy an apt, or go back to my hometown where the cost of living is more affordable and I would have more budget to travel. But leaving Paris seems crazy to me even though I constantly complain that I'm broke 🤔😭😅

    • @TaraWagner
      @TaraWagner  Рік тому

      How did this decision making process go? Have you gone through the steps yet?

  • @millamay16
    @millamay16 2 роки тому +1

    My best friend and my boyfriend are making me choose between them... Yay for me

    • @TaraWagner
      @TaraWagner  2 роки тому

      That is a hard decision that I'd hate for anyone to have to make. Sending you well wishes as you navigate how you will maintain a relationship with both your boyfriend and bestie.

    • @lesleymay6757
      @lesleymay6757 Рік тому

      They're both being selfish.....unless one did something truly heinous, you shouldn't have to choose between two people you really care about.

    • @millamay16
      @millamay16 Рік тому

      encase anyone was wondering: I ended up loosing my friend because she started bullying my boyfriend and even me, so I was like "yo I'm unsubscribing from this friendship" (obviously in a nice way) and now she has turned all my friends against me so now I only have a few friends and my boyfriend. I can't tell if this is a good or a bad outcome? I lost a toxic friend and kept my amazing boyfriend, but the cost is that now I've lost like all my friends. 👍

    • @lesleymay6757
      @lesleymay6757 Рік тому

      @@millamay16 then they are not your real friends either. I'm 43 and have learned this: it's better to have 1-3 really good friends, then to have a bunch of "friends" who are only there for the good times and leave you hanging when you need them. Focus on the ones you have, and don't worry. New people will come into your life if you're a good person.

  • @dylearose6801
    @dylearose6801 3 роки тому

    I'm 19. I'm going to stop study and start work. But I'm still confused.

    • @TaraWagner
      @TaraWagner  3 роки тому

      Have you done the exercise from the vid in its entirety?

  • @leanr1805
    @leanr1805 4 роки тому

    I don't know what subjects or career to pick... Its hard to pick.. Any advice for sure

    • @TaraWagner
      @TaraWagner  4 роки тому +1

      Let me know how the process goes for you!

    • @leanr1805
      @leanr1805 4 роки тому

      @@TaraWagner I've tried I just have been Indecisive and no clarity

    • @TaraWagner
      @TaraWagner  4 роки тому +2

      I don’t know the details of your situation so here’s my best advice given that... I would seek guidance from someone you trust and who’s ahead of where you are in the process and who has no agenda of their own. I would also just START because in some situations the clarity can only come through experience. So start testing things out and see where it takes you. Inaction will NEVER create clarity. What’s the next best step you can take?

  • @anshumanshivhare8386
    @anshumanshivhare8386 2 роки тому

    Should I go on a date or should I join my lecture ? Please help

    • @TaraWagner
      @TaraWagner  2 роки тому

      Haha which one aligns better with your long term goals and values? 😂

  • @galwaygirl8131
    @galwaygirl8131 2 роки тому

    I would love any help. I am currently going through tough grief. Myself and my whole family. Its been a incredibly difficult year. I have been offered to work in Brooklyn for 4 weeks as a camp Counselor. I live on the UK and it's a amazing opportunity. However I have anxiety about leaving my family. I am extremely close with my mum and it's difficult the thought of not being with her for 4 weeks. I know it's not that long a few years ago and I could go longer without seeing my family. But everything has changed since last August. I don't know what to do. I know it would be a incredible experience but I just can't decide. It would probably give me a break from the routine I have been in. But it's scary parting from people when we are all grieving. If anyone could give any help or advice it would be so amazing. Thank you

    • @TaraWagner
      @TaraWagner  2 роки тому

      Your feelings about leaving are completely valid. It is a big decision that will bring on a great deal of change, however it is all very exciting! I encourage you to shift your perspective, create space to feel all of the feels, and also give yourself an abundance of grace. The hardest part will be breaking away from what is familiar right now. Once you have transitioned into this big decision give yourself permission to create a new routine that I hope you will enjoy just as much. :)

  • @leihu7066
    @leihu7066 2 роки тому

    For 6 months now, I’m still struggling with life decision

    • @TaraWagner
      @TaraWagner  2 роки тому

      I hear you! When you are facing a big decision, it does take time, it does take effort, it takes some processing. Sometimes figuring out how to make a big decision is hard because we know what we need to do, but we’re just afraid to do it. But sometimes we are legit stuck between a rock and a hard place and the choice is just not clear. I hope this vid was helpful for you. :)

    • @leihu7066
      @leihu7066 2 роки тому

      @@TaraWagner its gotten me so bad into funk.

  • @v4mpb3rry
    @v4mpb3rry 3 роки тому +1

    the advice starts at 3:52

    • @TaraWagner
      @TaraWagner  3 роки тому

      But the real entertainment starts at 0:00 😂

    • @v4mpb3rry
      @v4mpb3rry 3 роки тому

      @@TaraWagner true! I'm glad I got to hear your story as well as your advice. ❤

  • @britt3458
    @britt3458 3 роки тому +1

    hey guys! I have a problem and maybe one of you can help. I am a dancer and have been dancing since I was four. i like dancing the best there is and i love performing but i am really dreading my dance lessons. i always go there reluctantly and i don't really like the classes. the only thing i like is learning to dance and dance these. now i decided to quit last year and this took half a year but this school year i started again because i missed dancing. because of this I am also very behind the rest of the group and I experience so much stress. I skipped my lessons this week because I don't know what to do. there is no other dance school with this style in the area so when I stop it is really done with classes. I've known the group almost all my life, so that also plays a role. I am afraid of their reactions to quit 2x in 1 year and afraid of making the wrong choice

    • @TaraWagner
      @TaraWagner  3 роки тому

      What is it that makes you dread the class?

    • @bristlethistlethespy9356
      @bristlethistlethespy9356 3 роки тому +1

      @Britt
      Heyo, I had the same problem with swimming. I competed in Butterfly when I was like nine, and won, but it felt kind of forced. My mom made sure I knew how to swim, because one of my relatives drowned at a young age, and made a Deal that I wouldnt quit untill 7th grade. I dreaded every lesson, just like you.
      I have been dancing a lot too, actually. From What I read u only like to learn choreographys, and dance them? Im just wondering What style You’re dancing, Cuz I dance hip hop, but I know that if u dance Jazz or Ballet, you have to learn way more stuff. Would be helpful to know, and good luck ❤️

  • @waynelast1685
    @waynelast1685 2 роки тому

    White boards??? HAHA I have 6 large , 2 medium and 1 mini whiteboard.. they are my favorite thing of all times.

    • @TaraWagner
      @TaraWagner  2 роки тому

      Haha! Nice...what's your favorite way of organizing your thoughts and/or ideas on your many whiteboards? :)

  • @dimii27
    @dimii27 4 місяці тому

    I don't trust anyone 🙂

    • @TaraWagner
      @TaraWagner  4 місяці тому

      I'm sorry. That's gotta be hard sometimes.

  • @user-or4hf1eh7o
    @user-or4hf1eh7o 3 роки тому +1

    Greetings ,I'm a teenager girl from greece and I would really appreciate some advice. I am currently staying with my grandma bc my mother kicked me out, while my dad lives far away. It's been hard living with my grandma and her fights between my mother. Thankfully my dad proposed the idea to let me stay with him. But I'm torn AF bc I have two years to prepare for the college examination and I'm not sure which option is better for me and my mental health. Staying in the town I'm used to or moving into a new town with hopes of making my mental health better. I've done a lot of brainstorming but nowhere near deciding. I apologize if what I wrote doesn't make much sense.If anyone is reading this ,please say your opinion.

    • @TaraWagner
      @TaraWagner  3 роки тому

      What are your greatest values and your long term goals?

    • @user-or4hf1eh7o
      @user-or4hf1eh7o 3 роки тому

      @@TaraWagner life moves quickly. I have already decided. Thank you for taking the time to reply and I wish the best for you :)

    • @TaraWagner
      @TaraWagner  3 роки тому

      Glad to hear that! What did you choose?

    • @user-or4hf1eh7o
      @user-or4hf1eh7o 3 роки тому

      @@TaraWagner to live with my mom and continue my studies in the same town

  • @CindyHuskyGirl
    @CindyHuskyGirl 3 роки тому

    this lady looks like shes gonnna walk into a store for no reason and just immediately ask for the manager

  • @chindasam-woboadele7471
    @chindasam-woboadele7471 2 роки тому +1

    Can you go straight to the point next time . You beat around the bush a lot .

    • @TaraWagner
      @TaraWagner  2 роки тому +1

      Haha! I'm glad you stuck around. :)

    • @lesleymay6757
      @lesleymay6757 Рік тому

      You can forward if you really want to

  • @69yellowcorvette
    @69yellowcorvette Рік тому

    Right now I’m struggling to choose to study phlebotomy tech or EKG tech … 🥲

    • @TaraWagner
      @TaraWagner  Рік тому

      Okay that is valid! Have you taken some time to weigh your pros and cons?

    • @69yellowcorvette
      @69yellowcorvette Рік тому

      @@TaraWagner as a matter of fact, I did whilst watching your video. Then even contacted a friend for an intelligent comment.. she mentioned that she makes all decisions based on the long term, never to satisfy the short term.
      She also mentioned that she takes time to make sure she’s honest with herself about what she wants.
      So, I used a combination of both your advice and hers.

    • @TaraWagner
      @TaraWagner  Рік тому

      Yessss to long-term! That's exactly what I discuss in the vid here - knowing your long-term goals and values to determine what will best align. So does this mean you found your answer?