Exposing The Dark Side Of The Church | 10 Tips For Supporting Victims Of Clergy Sexual Abuse

Carolyn from Hagar's Voice is back for Part 2 as we focus on addressing corruption in the church by providing 10 tips for supporting victims of clergy sexual abuse.
In this episode, we dive deeper into our conversation with Carolyn from Hagar's Voice, an organization dedicated to supporting survivors of clergy sexual abuse. Carolyn discusses the systemic problems within churches that silence female victims, the patriarchal power structures, and the importance of trauma-informed advocacy in hopes of bringing the dark side of the church to light. We wanted to cover essential topics such as the DARVO response, empowering survivors, and the crucial steps churches can take to address abuse actively. We want to encourage you to engage in intentional, informed, and supportive actions, following the ten outlined principles by Hagar's Voice to support victims effectively.
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// SKIP TO //
00:00 The Problem of Voiceless Victims
01:01 Welcome
01:29 Meet Carolyn from Hagar's Voice
03:18 DARVO and Coercive Techniques
08:41 The Role of Grief and Emotional Support
10:02 Power Dynamics in Churches
12:39 The Importance of Trauma-Informed Care
18:08 Steps to Support Survivors
28:27 Amplifying Voices and Believing Stories
29:42 Understanding Theodicizing and Its Impact
34:40 The Importance of Consent and Boundaries
40:37 Engaging Through a Trauma-Informed Lens
41:08 Referring to Professionals and Staying Engaged
43:17 Empowering Survivors and Avoiding Re-Traumatization
45:32 Conclusion and Resources
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[@saoirsejb]

I was listening to a former IHOPKC member's story recently.
She said that in the 1980s in the wake of the Jesus People movement (when a senior leader molested her), there just was no "grid" for identifying and addressing sexual abuse & predatory behaviour by church leaders.
This upsets me so much.
I was a teenager in the 1980s.
Everywhere I turned, I collided with gender hierarchy & male headship doctrine. I constantly pointed out that authority pyramids were unbiblical and counter to the unity & mutuality of true Kingdom of God culture.
Everywhere, I could see grooming behaviour, coercive behaviour and predatory behaviour by the same men who lectured us on "purity" and man-splained the "umbrella of protection" to us and told us that women who wore mascara or pants were "in rebellion" and that rebellion was "as the sin of witchcraft".
I noticed that the ones who spewed spiritualized misogyny & homophobia the most (carefully camouflaged in flowery Christian "love") seemed to be the ones most likely to be up to stuff behind the scenes and off the stage.
So, in the 1990s, I started keeping a list.
Ted Haggard. Jimmy Swaggart. Jim Bakker. Bill Gothard. Doug Phillips. The names kept coming.
I started speaking up. I pointed out that gender inequality, white-washed sexism, and male headship doctrine in the church, plus the emphasis on venerating "authority", would lead to a scourge of sexual abuse & exploitation, and cover up, in the church.
Even I could not have foretold how bad, and how rampant it would be.
So, can you guess what happened to me, when I started calling out authoritarianism & male supremacy in the church, as early as the 1980s?
I was branded a Jezebel.
No one wanted to hear.
I am just one of thousands of people, with true 'prophetic' voices on this issue, who were cast out, our warnings dismissed.
I cannot tell you how frustrated I feel.
We were told that WE were the evil ones.
Our voices were quenched.
We couldn't stop men like Bickle, or Morris and we couldn't save people like Tammy, or Cindy.
The "nice" people in the church disapproved of the likes of us.