Why I'm okay with being average
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- Опубліковано 5 лип 2024
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Chapters:
00:00 - Introduction
03:57 - Sponsorship
05:16 - The rabbit hole
05:52 - I. Get rid of the idea that I can only be or do one thing
07:03 - II. Practice being at peace with the fact that I won't ever be able to do it all
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🥰🥰🥰🥰 Oh venus that rise before the sunrise and rise before the sunset, Here I am looking above for your glitch answer. Is miss Blakely my Gloomy Moon?
“I have a fear of not experiencing life as much as I can. I fear that I’m taking life for granted.” Love this quote ❤️
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But u r not avg
Celebrating being "average" is the new being extraordinary. It's the epitome of realizing you aren't the center of the world, but meant to experience it from a centered place. Thank you for the reminder Lana! :)
It is hard to undo the social conditioning but it is possible.
@@conversationcorner1837 Totally, but I think more and more people are starting to realize what matters
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Omggg this !!!!!!!
Beautifully said :)
‘My mom always used to say that average people are the most special people in the world. And that's why God made so many.’ - Michael Scott
That doesn't make sense. If something is truly special, it's supposed to be rare
my biggest mistake is that i'm currently still trying to get a rid of this : i always overthink about the thing that i'm going to do/ take, even just a simple thing like : oh it's holiday, should i use my time to learn language, deep cleaning my house, learning politics, reading a book, or learning to cook? i feel like i'm so indecisive to decide what best to do for my precious holiday time. and then i will end up doing nothing
We're the same in terms of overthinking about doing simple tasks. I overthink them to the point that I spend too much time doing them and I have less time to do the other things that I want to do :(( Meanwhile, we're the opposite when it comes to doing things during holiday lol I keep myself busy during the holiday by doing the things that I want to do that is why I tend to be exhausted whenever classes start
So relatable
The whole being ok with being average thing has been the hardest thing to come in terms with for me. As a "gifted child" I was used to being a pro at things, and has believed my whole life that I need to be the best at everything I do. And needless to say that made my life miserable, because it's not possible. And it's OK that you're not the best at everything you do. And I still need to remind my self that now and then.
That should bring a little peace to the mind.
Can relate
Can relate as well! Sending hugs to you with consent
can relate
How did you end up finding some peace in being average? I am in the same boat.
So relatable, I'm 27 and still don't know what to do "when I grow up" I need 100 lives to do it all 😊
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haha, your grown up , I guess your talking about when you hit the grave.
@@abcde269 that’s harsh
@@abcde269 im guessing you’re just on your early teens lol but 27 is young and life doesn’t ends at 30’s haha
bitter old Hindu Karen
I feel that I can strongly relate to this. While live only one life when you could try so many things? Yes, this requires relinquishing perfectionism and accepting the fact that you may have no 'one single grand career' but I would rather treat my life as my own opus magnum and an experience treasure hunt! I have so far trained to be a broadway dancer, studied humanitarianism and work in the field as a humanitarian worker, switched to a hip PR agency in Paris and now I work in a big tech corporation!
Whoa!!!! How are you liking the latest switch so far?
That’s incredible, good for you!
If you don’t mind my asking, How are you able to make so many switches? And how did you further your education in all of these fields to en able to make a living off of them? they all sound quite different from one another
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(no ofense) Do you have ADHD
This is literally me. I freak out every time someone says that I have to choose a career to specialized in for the rest of my life. I can't imagine myself doing only one career in my life because I'm a very curious person and I wanted to try all the things that this world could offer. I wanted to try different things to satisfy my curiosity and I would freaking regret it If I don't. If I were to be at the end of my life I will regret not trying everything that I wanted in this life.
You still can. You just have to be smart and save for when or if you retire
Instead of choosing a career to specialize in, perhaps consider finding an *employer* that you can stay with for the long haul, even if the work itself isn't glamorous. Somewhere that offers a relatively stable work schedule that allows you to pay your bills and still gives you free time to pursue your interests. Bonus points if it doesn't require you to take out thousands in student loans for a worthless degree that you'll never actually use.
I just had a conversation with my boyfriend about this, because I am struggling with choosing a "career" for myself. And this is the conclusion I also came to: I want to earn money to survive and be able to explore as many aspects of life as possible. It's okay to be average, and actually also a liberating thought.
There is nothing wrong with being average, but many would definitely consider you way above average 🙏
I wouldn’t classify you as being average, Lana! You have nearly 1M subscribers! That’s awesome! Keep living life, you are young, smart & strong! You will do great things!
There's this thing called "analysis paralysis", where we parse out our choices to the nth and never end up accomplishing anything. I think sometimes arriving at this point means we need to step back and take a breath, and other times it means we just need to pick something, and be ok with it possibly not being the perfect thing.
We're never going to have all the data anyway.
Lana... it is so coincidental that you posted this! I was searching up this exact topic all of last night! I struggle with this so hard, I want to do everything and be good at it so badly that it kills me. Please never delete this video.
I was searching for this topic too and couldn’t find much. So I was like, I guess I’ll just make a video about it myself then haha. Glad you found it valuable!
I relate so much Lana!! ❤️As a doctor, I'm happy being "average", as long my patients are safe and well taken care of. I got the highest grades throughout school, and I still have perfectionist and overachiever traits... But I just can't maintain that! I love music, making UA-cam videos, graphic design, learning languages etc - I can enjoy these things in life without being an expert at them! Diversity is the spice of life, and I'm not "average" if I'm doing the things I enjoy to the level I enjoy them. So go forth, try out new things, don't worry about being good at them - life's too short for that!
100 love this!!!!
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agree!
Leonardo da Vinci is someone I really look up to as a 'universal man', someone with a wide array of knowledge and skills. I have autism, so I sometimes become completely obsessed with a certain topic and really dive into the rabbit hole head first. I want to learn about history and music and science and culture and so much more. And I know that I can never know or do everything. But as long as I continue learning and improving myself I think I'm doing okay.
'not trying to become an elite at everything is liberating somehow' damn... that is true and somewhat agree. at some point in life, i really wish I'm good at ONE thing but after a careful reminiscent, I think being /good/at everything is ok too. means you can enjoy variety of things. and i think that is awesome than just good at one thing you know. you really limit yourself of what you can or cannot do, so just try everything until you find /the one/
This is such an interesting perspective. Love the quote “You can do anything, but not everything”- reminds me of choice paralysis, we fear missing out on something if we make a choice but in actuality pursuing specific interests creates structure, which provides freedom from so many options. To your final point, knowing what you should choose is certainly the hard part when you don’t have any particular interests, it can also be the fun part in relation to exploration and curiosity as you mentioned in the beginning. Great video and content, I certainly appreciated the energy in this one!
I'm an infj and I miss being myself. I've been infected by dealing with so many narcissists in my life that I had to change my personality so many times to save myself and not just only that I've been through multiple mental breakdowns throughout the last few years. Watching you gives me the best feelings ever cuz I feel like I'm watching myself. You are a mirror of me. I'm working on recovering and I will get back to myself eventually. Weirdest feeling ever when you actually miss yourself, never knew that this existed till now. Wish you the bestest of luck in your life. And remember you actually made a difference in someone's life BIG time.
Well, I personally try not to overthink anything. The odds of being born in the first place are extremely remote anyway, I'm just thankful for the opportunity to experience life in the first place; irrespective of how much time I may have
My life has been a complete and total misery ever since Bigfoot stole my precious girlfriend in the middle of the night.😒 He even took all her clothes and the T.V.
Wut
@@joelstephenson8017 😔😔😔
This was SOOOO NEEDED!!! I am in my last year of grad few months away and I feel extremely insecure. I want to be the smartest,the prettiest,the funniest,the most knowledgeable,the kindest etc etc. and I’m having a hard time accepting that I can’t just be all. Because I’m only human. Sure I can be good at a couple things or maybe 3 but not all and nobody actually can. Thankyou for celebrating avgness. Because sometimes avgness is the greatest virtue. Why should I just be the best dancer or the prettiest model or the smartest where I work or cook the best. When I can be good at little of everything and enrich my overall life experience !
This video definitely hits home for me as I’ve always had this horrible perfectionist mindset where I must be “extraordinary” at everything. That’s a lot of pressure to put on yourself. I just ended up just being miserable for years. Accepting that my life will not be one of constant amazing achievements has actually lead to me enjoying life more. It’s actually a huge relief. Trying to be perfect all the time is exhausting. I’ll take average any day ❤️
Lana, this video found me at the exact right time. I am in the same situation. 27, single, I'm in a different country as my family and I'm kind of freaking out because I want to do so many things but feel so pressured by society and this hustle culture to have my profession figured out and settled by the time I'm 30. Often I get petrified by the options when it comes to hobbies and I go in witht this mindset that it has to be perfect. But you're right, even if I bake one bread or go to one kickboxing class, at least I have experienced it!
I think you are lucky that you are interested in so many things! This means you are passionate about life. I myself struggle through finding even one thing that doesn't feel too tedious to pursue.
Maybe try one, small thing...but do it to the best of your ability and complete it. See where it takes you...
@@philsmith7398 how was your comment posted 8 days ago but the original comment was posted 7 days ago lmao
So many people try to be perfect at one thing (I used to be one of them), but there is something so liberating about trying out everything you wish and failing at some of it. It's like: yes, I definitely do not want to be a lawyer. But in the process you discover something that you genuinely like and with it learn a bit more about yourself. Trying out different things without any expectations is the best mindset change I've had in my life.
Look at all your life decisions as if you're a kid at a play park.
The kid doesn't spend time deep in thought contemplating whether or not to go to the swing or the slide, it just goes to whichever one it's most drawn to.
If it goes to the slide and doesn't have fun, it'll just stop and go to the swing.
Next time they go to the park, they'll just naturally spend more time at the swing.
You shouldn't be thinking "which of these things are going to give me the most long term satisfaction".
You'll never know that answer, all you can know is what feels best for you now.
The world is your playground, go play.
I love your singing!!! You calm me today!!! I really needed this video because I have wasted so much of time here on Earth and taken many wrong decisions in my life that is so short. Thanks for you, I will ultimately appreciate being average and not striving to be constantly better than others. We just have to spend the time wisely and do what we love, because we have only one life. Happy Valentine's Day.❤️❤️
I feel the same. In my opinion, the only thing worth mastering is myself. And I discover more about me when I explore all worlds that I'm interested in, not just one of them for my entire life. For others, it's the opposite, but what matters is to not be an expert because the world says so, but because you truly want it.
I love that you remind us to enjoy the little moments in life and to make the most of what we currently have. I’m you always motivate me 💜💜
You talking about this actually made me feel at ease. I’m also like this but I feel like I need to stick to one thing because that is how the society is? My parents wants me to just be one thing or focus on one career. I want to experience so many things and try out different things all the time. I want to learn this and that. I thought I was crazy for that. Thank you for talking about this!
Yes there's an opportunity cost to everything. I learned that in an economics class in college,but it applies to everything because your time is a resource.
Sincerely, a fellow INFJ
Economics does help understand so much about human behaviour.
I have struggled with this topic; being average. Lately, I have thought that understanding the mere fact of this nature is part of growing up. You might not have the best looks, tallest height, richest family, etc. Those are things that you cannot change much, but doing the best with what you got is really the beauty of people
I can't explain in words how much I relate to your thoughts and to your videos in general. I am so happy that I found your channel. Quality work
So relatable. And comforting. Love this mindset
You speak so much sense. Thank you again, Lana. You’re amazing ❤️
This has to be my favourite video of yours. I so strongly relate to everything you said.
Here's to us coming to terms with the fact that we can't have it all, but we can still do plenty!
That's what I have been struggling for a long time....you have cleared it all for me. Thank you Lana....you always help me with my problems ❤❤
thnakyou Lana you always make me glad. It's difficult for me to feel glad but somehow your videos and the things you say makes me feel glad. Thankyou!
you have such an amazing perspective on life! :). it's really refreshing to watch someone with such curiosity and love for trying new things!
I was smiling the whole video. This is really relateble and made realize a lot of things about wanting to do it all when the fact is, i just can't. And that's okay. I will focus more maybe on the things the I wanted to do but not limiting myself to do more of the things that I also want to try. A great takeaway from this video is I can do anything but bot everything. Thank you Lana!This is such an eye opener and gave me wider perspective about living. You videos are always so excellent and meaningful
Thank you for articulating everything I've always thought about. I've always been aware that these things I think about aren't real "problems," so it feels extremely validating to watch your videos in which you express your thoughts so genuinely and vulnerably. I especially relate to this video so much as I've always struggled with thoughts that I can't ever be "great" at one thing because of my fear of commitment. I'm a curious soul always ready to learn and experience new things, and this video helped me more to embrace and accept the idea that it's okay to just be average.
This is the first thing I resonated with so much on UA-cam. I thought I was the only one..
Literally everything you said about yourself is so relatable, I felt like I was looking in a mirror .
Really appreciate this video, have a great day Lana :)
Your videos are being really helpful, I'm turning 20 and I find everything overwhelming and you bring peace and introspection
Ur videos became my safe space lately. I ve been following u for over a year and i ve never been so consistent ab a youtuber for so long. U give such a calm vibe I hope u ll do again vlogs ab ur life and storytell even small things. It s so less but so enough. U have such a realistic aesthetic life so perfectly imperfect. So glad I discovered u.
This is going to be my comfort video... Thank you!
Thank you Lana for all the advices you give on your videos, and for showing yourself how you really are. It helped me a lot to grow my own passions, develop my own personality, and discover that I'm made for myself and my loved ones, and not to fit in another groups. It's been a problem since I was a child, but I realized that being confortable with yourself is 100% more important than making other people like you. Sending hugs💕
I have been watching your videos for months. It's my first time leaving a comment because your videos are just so knowledgeable and amazing to me, giving me a sense of peace and relief out of other noisy channels. Please take your time to post quality videos!
I've been trying to explain this to people around me, and felt like I was never understood. So it feels really good to hear you. I have a HUUUGE list of skills I want to have but I'm never good enough at any of them.
i'm slowly developing this mindset! i haven't mastered it yet but i'm getting there :) amazing video as always, ms. lana
Thank you so much for sharing this point of view with us. I feel relieved somehow. Yes, experiencing something can be enough and we don't need to be great at everything we do. It's the experience that matters!
I think that in this day and age people have forgotten this simple thing. That we should all strive to find contentment, within our lot of life.
You look more happy in your recent videos, happy and full of life. I think I love this lana more❤️
This spoke to me. Thank you for sharing this video, and being so open.
Thank you for making this video. I relate to this 100%. I never was able to word this feeling and you did that for me!
This video opened my eyes to life, thanks for the upload Lana ✌️
I absolutely loved this video! I feel so inspired and you perfectly put into words what I have been thinking about for a couple of years now
The consistency of your videos are amazing and great content btw
I have no idea how I ended up seeing this video, but honestly I’m glad I did.
I’m often so overwhelmed with all the options that I end up not doing anything and I really just needed to hear what you had to say! So thank you!
Thank you! I needed that. I've always felt like that but didn't know how to put it into words.
love you Lana... It's like I can reach out to you no matter when.. even after years you have given me insights, perspectives and peace.. ❤ Keep doing your precious work.. thanks for coming into my life..
Thank you for Doing this. It was. Much needed. BTW Love it when you smile
I really loved this video. You bring your thoughts to explainable concepts really well. Your whole point on being more than one thing was such a good way of looking at life and it resonated a lot with me. Thank you :)
Lana this is the actual biggest coincidence I've seen in a while. This is exactly the thought process I've found myself stuck in recently, and it feels like you're actually talking to me down to every detail. Literally, the book shown at 5:21 is my actual cultural psychology textbook and I read those exact pages just last week-- I'm shocked. Thank you for sharing your perspectives so honestly and in such a way that always makes me think
@fooferdoodles what is this book called?
@@oliviajune8599 “Cultural Psychology” by Steven J. Heine. It’s genuinely such an interesting read if you’re interested in the science of culture and how it influences things like behavior and moral development.
I needed to hear this today. Thanks, Lana!
Amazing video Lana! Totally agree with you. As an ADHD person it gets even more challenging to find this balance, but I got keep looking for strategies, step by step.
this came at a perfect perfect time ilysm and thank you so much for your words luv
I totally agree with you, there is definitely value in being good at a lot of things as opposed to be great at one. Whatever makes you feel more fulfilled just pursue that
loved the video! thank you for reading my mind and helping me accept the situation better
Hey Lana , I can relate to you so much, I Iove watching your videos as it brings so much warmth
Oh Lana, this is a thing even I struggle with! It's a constant dilemma. When you have the eye to see beauty in so many different lifestyles, professions and almost everything, it becomes a problem of choice. Which is also known as opportunity cost in economics- cost of next best alternative foregone. There is so much to do, so much, and time is so limited. I think we should take it as a sign to not waste even a single second of our lives on things like social media, worthless scrolling, or any thing for that matter. Lovely content, keep it coming.
I have the same problem . I have a ton of things that I want to get done all the time , the difference is it of ten makes me unhappy instead of happy or excited .
Very relatable video Lana 😇 Thank you so much for putting something I really needed. I am also too curious and want to try different things, and it feels like I am interested in many things at one time. I was feeling something is wrong with me, but watching your video and knowing your views. I am feeling a relief, feels like found the answers of my questions. Keep Growing, lots of good wishes to you 👍😊
thank you for all your videos :c i save the transcript of your vids so i could read and take note of the things you say :c your introvert vid was what got me hooked to your content!
I really needed this today. I have played piano for 10 years now, so you'd think I'd be some great pianist that knows all the chords and scales and can play dozens and dozens of classical pieces by memory.... But I can't.
I can play well, but it's nothing spectacular.
I can play some scales and chords but to name all the different chords is something I haven't learned.
I don't practice 2 hours a day... in fact there are some days I just can't get around to practicing.
It's a hobby for a reason. It is only one of the things I do. Piano isn't the whole picture, and I need to be okay with that.
It’s okay, I’ve played for 8 years. Can’t read a music sheet to this day. :D
I can relate so much to this, at 32 i still have the same problem, it's really hard to strike that balance, everytime you get one thing right something else falls, and then new things keep popping up all the time, can't stop exploring life i guess... but i think that's the challenge and the beauty of it. Love your channel btw, just came across it recently, lovely content :)
I never comment on anything but I’m happy because I feel like no one or at least few people understand my thoughts and your channel makes me know that others think this way and go into depth about all these topics. Your channel and some others I’ve found have made me feel more human. I wish the internet was more full of the actual reality of being a person and each part to it, more raw feelings; thank you!
Thanks for keeping it real Lana!
I started watching your videos for improving my English skills (because I am mexican hahaha), and I became addicted to your philosophy and it helps me so much. So thank you for being such a great person and a teacher ❤
That's awesome. Hope your English keeps improving.
As always, thank you for the great content! I honestly believe thet pure positive emotions come from comparing ourselves only to ourselves; although modern times make this process more difficult for us, we should do our best to stay focused on our subjective being rather than the color of the grass next door.
really true, before im worrying if im not on top, now im ok that im on average, idont need now to competent on everything, Thank you for this huhu
Noone ever touched this topic of feeling that it might be fearful to think that you’ll never be able to experience everything n that you’re not even seeing a fraction of it .
Thank you lana .
I'm so happy you're talking about this. ...somehow I need these answers. I... sometimes consider the last generations since the World War(s) have been particularly confused. Anyone lovingly taking effort to dig deeper is a great help.
This was incredibly inspirational to me. Really. I'm like you, I think it's unfair to have to pick only one thing among an infinite amount of things... It's not simple at all. Despite the fact that I want to follow so many paths at the same time (psychologist, doctor, philosophy teacher, linguistics professor, aircraft pilote...) I've been constantly bored. For years. I'm easily bored, it doesn't make sense. But there are so many things to do! You made me remind that small detail. I decided that, from now on, I'm not going to be bored anymore. I'll make use of my time, even if it's not for useful purposes (I mean, if I feel like drawing, I'll draw, if I want to dig in about a whole new subject online, I'll do it). So thanks!!!
I love your content so much, thank you for this message. You have no idea how much I needed it.
Wow. It is insane how "on time" in my life this video appeared. I can relate with being difficult kid even now, when I am 23 and with calling my mom with completely new ideas for life. I am at the point in my life where this topic bothers me the most. I keep thinking about all the lives that I won't have anymore. In a month I turn 23 years old and on the one hand I know that I am still very young, and on the other hand I feel that I am so "average" I have not achieved anything, I am not really good at anything, because I have always been curious to experience many different things, I couldn't focus on one. I danced for a few years, trained karate for a few years, then I drew, then I made films, then I tried to learn graphics design, played the piano, sang, and for a few years I also rode horses. Ultimately, I stopped doing each of these things, because I was interested in the next and the next, every now and then I had a new idea for myself, a new passion, and we can't do everything at once. Recently, I became interested in figure skating, I started watching the Olympic Games and suddenly I got into such a depressive state looking at figure skaters and other athletes, because I think that these people are amazing, they do one thing all life, they are champions at it, they are so EXTRAORDINARY, they have specific skills, they have achieved something, they gave all their lives to the sport. I'm already at such an age that whatever sport I would start, I would never reach a high level anymore because I'm too old, life is too short, I just can’t accept that… but I am also practicing. Thank you for this video :)
Are you me? 😂
@@LanaBlakely I can relate to most of the things you say in your videos, so it's very possible that we're soulmates haha :D
Just reading this rn and you described me literally? I was always thinking like "will I ever go and do something serious that will contribute to this world" instead of trying the next thing and the next thing. Makes me feel an outcast around most people I know, because they are good at least in one particular thing and I'm like "I have no plans, but I have a lot of hobbies.."
thank you so much for your sharing. This video makes me feel better.
I so needed to hear this today! Thank you
Im someone who are so get interested in so many things and it confuses and distracts the hell out of me 😅. Watching your video makes me feel that I’m not alone. And it also remind me that what I actually want is the experience, even getting recognistion with the work I do is also an experience - but it’s not everything. Thank you and love see you getting brighter and glow as who you are in this vid ❤️. Big hugs
I couldn't have worded the subject better myself, you have a beautiful smile. 🥰
When you started singing I guess I felt peace for the first time in weeks😌
Please please please keep singing ♥️
A simple but powerful message, Lana. There aren't enough hours in our lifetime to do everything that we would like, but there are enough to dabble in a diverse range of fields if you are smart with your time management.
True
For the past couple of days, I've been thinking about how I want to do so many things. I have also been like this my entire life. I want to experience a lot of things, but not necessarily be great at it all. You phrased that so well!!!
The perfect vid for someone who is currently experiencing burnout from all doing what the hustle culture is saying, as well as self loathe for not meeting the expectations you have set for yourself.
I have also always wanted to do it all and so ended up exhausting myself mentally. I agree prioritizing is most important and then just let go of the rest. And to relax and enjoy life day to day, what better thing could we do, but also do things well that we do choose. And some people like a lot of balance and others focusing on one passion at a time. I'm definitely the former. I'm glad you are finding peace with this situation!😊 I'm getting there, I guess it is a work in progress, maybe life long
Love you Lana!!! 💚
Thank you for sharing your insights 💜
Loved this
Thank you for this video and your words! It made me feel way less alone
I needed this. Thank you 💜