how to overcome loneliness | causes, myths and REAL solutions
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- Опубліковано 2 лис 2023
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My mission is to help young women everywhere become their BEST SELVES and create their dream life. Self-improvement and self-love transformed my life. It took me from being the shy, insecure, unmotivated girl who was always hurt by men... to being the woman who prioritises herself everyday, achieves the goals on her vision board, takes herself on dates, feels fulfilled when alone, has a newfound confidence AND has power over her dating life. I found my purpose in life after working on myself and I want to help and inspire YOU to do the same.
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“You have no excuse to complain that you’re lonely when you continue to sit in rooms where you are ignored, judged, and misunderstood.” Girlfriennnnnnd 👏🏽👏🏽👏🏽 love seeing a desi sister (sorry if that’s an incorrect assumption) with such a strong platform and message 🙌🏽 I wish you so all the success and recognition you deserve
I mean she is punjabi so she is desi
I thought she was from srilanka😐😑😶
What made you think that? She mentions in her videos that she's punjabi
@@kritisalun2873 you may have confused her with nimeshaa she's srilankan
so basically from what i'm learning, by focusing on yourself and making yourself happy you can attract the right people who won't make you feel lonely. it's a lot easier said than done, i'm on this journey right now. thank you for the reminders tam
How do you know I needed it!!! 😭😭😭 I'm grateful my notifications are on!!!
Yepppppp idk how she gets an idea even I needed this…… n I’m so happy after receiving this
Same here😢
Same! 😭
Ohh yeahhh for a week I also feel lonely yet I rarely feel so ❤
Samee
Notes:
1. Causes 2:23
Lack of self
Relying on other people
Let’s go back to self
You’re simply in the wrong place
Excessive digital socialization
2.Solutions 10:28
Find your purpose outside of other people
Being able to see the joy in life
Call up a friend and share something of value
Work on yourself
Reconnect with your inner child
Regular journaling
3.Homework 15:50
A real solo date
Journal or meditate
Call a close friend/partner/family member and discuss something that matters to you
Join a online community
Come back home to yourself ,romanticize your life,build yourself
That’s it :)
I've suffered from extreme loneliness in the past couple of years but I finally came in peace with it and now I don't feel lonely at all cause I put all my trust in God! He's always by my side!!! :)
Fvck Religion
OMG!!!!!
I literally had sudden pang of loneliness in my office today and was wondering what can and should I do and here you are. Being Goddess to us all❤️🧿
Same here
We need to talk about how to connect with yourself. I've made some pretty bad choices for myself such as drinking, smoking and hanging with the wrong people in college. Over the course of years, of not choosing yourself, I found myself disconnected from myself and unable to reconnect even though I left that lifestyle & group. I moved in with my family after college, and my family have always been super toxic from the time I was young, over the years, this INTENSELY made me more detached with myself. I can't even explain to you the loneliness I felt, it was so strong that it physically hurt my body. It soon hit me that the family members around me don't choose me, (it's a toxic vicious clique in your own home, think means girls who gang up against you, never takes your side or supports you, unfairly biased, enjoys dominating you and controlling you lol) when it hit me that they don’t choose me, and I continue to choose them in the name of love, I suddenly had a shift. It's like I felt my body and soul shifting into one when I told myself that I'll choose myself. I can't tolerate any of this crap anymore in the name of love, when there is no love here. That shift that I felt where I chose myself, was the most liberating feeling ever. I have never felt that specific type of lonliness again, where it's physically painful. It takes bravery to choose yourself, when you don't know what will happen once you move out, you don't really have friends to rely on near you, etc. but I'll do it, I know i'll make it cause I have myself to stand up for me.
you are strong my love u r not alone dw we love u 🫂💗
You got this okay!!! Keep going I know it's hard but I believe in you.
This is actually insane. I’m at uni any i’ve been feeling so lonely which has never been a Problem for me, and this video was genuinely such a godsend because i really need to hear this ❤
I lost a friend recently and am at uni now too. I have never felt so lonely in my life. I definitly feel you!!
Same
I cut off toxic people gradually this semester and I've been going on solo dates instead of burning my energy on those big toxic groups, I even started to be very confidently smart in classes instead of sensoring my knowledge and this is on their nerves. And today I was wondering if I'm doing it right or I'm just isolating myself. Thank you for this video❤ (and for all your videos, I'm becoming a highvalue woman)
Okay so I've been watching tam's videos for some months and it has become my favourite UA-cam channel whenever I feel demotivated or empty I just come to her channel and suddenly I get so energized by her energy she's so magical her existence makes me feel happy, you're the best tam there's no one better than you on this platform keep shining, growing and helping us love ya!💗
NO COZ SAME BESTIE
literally same! she is the best
To have someone like her is a privilege. Thank you so much Tam!💗💗
honestly your videos are what inspired me to love myself even when I felt no one else did and to find happiness even in solitude. I’m so glad now that I didn’t give up on myself and I have you to thank for that :)
your videos always help me to get myself together. lately i have been feeling lonely eventhough i always try to spend more time with people and i realize i havent had the time to sit with my thoughts alone and have a solo date in a while. thank you for the reminder Tam! your positive energy is so magical
ur videos have actually saved me lowkey 😭 i've been watching you since the start of 2023 and i feel like my life has literally changed in the most positive way. im actually so happy to have discovered you when i was 15 and having a lack of self-esteem, confidence and also feelings of loneliness. watching ur videos helped me change all of that and im so so grateful. still on my journey but thank u for everything that you do
Tam, you're a gem. Thank you so much for helping me realize this. I AGREE 100% with everything you said in this video, so true. Loneliness is a feeling of disconnection- that's what it feels like to me, just a feeling of utter disconnection, and this one word- 'disconnected' is what I hear in every person's explanation of what loneliness feels like. I thought I was just disconnected from the world because of my inability to be intimate and vulnerable enough to be my 'true self' to others. No. I was disconnected from MYSELF because of my inability to be intimate and vulnerable enough to even LOOK at my 'true self', know myself, face myself and CONNECT with myself. The world is a mirror. When you have issues with relationships with others, that simply means you have an issue with your relationship with YOURSELF. It is never an external problem, it always stems from the internal world. What I've realized about my constant state of stress and pressure when socializing, and my inability to truly connect and be genuine and form genuine relationships with others, is that it's because I don't even know myself. I can't even allow myself to be my genuine self to myself. I'm afraid to find out something about myself I won't like, and so I hide both from others and from myself. These issues were never about them, it was always about me. But now that I know what the real problem is here, I know what the real solution is, and I can work on it. And that is actually getting to know myself, connecting with myself, and being present and attentive to myself, being present with myself and not some distant 'perfect' future. Thank you so much Tam you really help me and so many people out in a productive and compassionate way, you make me feel seen and like it will all be okay, LOVE YOUUUU (I'm sorry for my neverending saga of me accidentally oversharing on the internet)
THANK YOU SO MUCH FOR THIS BIG SIS!!! I did not even know that I needed this... Thank you so much for this. I had an epiphany while watching the video and will surely be changing the habits that I have unconsciously fallen into.
the way this video came out at just the right time
I can't believe you dropped this video just when I needed this! I LOVE YOU SO MUCH. I love how informative and practical your advice actually is.
Tam I swear I was feeling lonely for the past few days and I searched on UA-cam for help and tried to find a video about loneliness in your channel but was unsuccessful. This video has proved to me you have super abilities to know just what video your audience needs ❤ You are honestly like my older sister and I thank you for your informative videos. 🙏🏻
This might just be one of the best videos in your channel. I went back to my country after finishing my bachelor and I had forgotten how lonely and badly understood I felt here until I couldn't manage it anymore. Now I feel like at least there are some things we can all do and that we are in fact so not alone
I swear the universe is telling me to watch and reflection on my own loneliness! Thank you for your content and making me feel I'm not alone:)
I love Tams videos, but I really needed this one. I only have one close friend and when we are going through hard times I feel lonely and even though I spend a lot of time alone, I distract myself from being alone. I am definitely going to take all of this and add it to my life to help me ❤ thank you once again Tam ❤❤❤❤❤❤
This girl has done a lot of self introspection. Thank you ❤ sending loving positive vibes ❤
I love Tam's energy and the fact she gives tips from her heart 💗💗❗❗
The beginning of this video described me exactly. Thankyou so much Tam ilysm you’ve helped me and my life SO MUCH it’s crazy!! ❤ pls never stop being such a queen
Dear Tam, thank you so much for this video, you have no idea how many people's life you're changing with your how to series and me being one of them thanks you from the bottom of my heart.
I stumbled upon your 'how to be productive' video a few months back when I was going through a rough time and decided to finally take charge of my life, and it is an understatement to say that your video changed my life, it flipped me 360.
I am not good at verbally expressing things (which I am trying to change, baby steps), but just know that your videos are my holy grails. I come to watch your videos and make notes (like literal written notes) on your advices and have been incorporating it in my life slowly by slowly and I am seeing the changes I've always wanted to see, thank you for being 'you' and thank you for giving us contents like this, your videos are very much needed and appreciated.
OMG the timing of this video !
Can't explain in words, these days I feel like I am begging people to talk to me, to be seen, to be understood. Especially, the family thing you mentioned, no one really talks, busy with their own selves to even have a proper conversation. Just 1 hr back, I vented out on my voice note, and just now I was about to journal, this video popped up. I really was telling myself - "Only I can fully understand myself, Only I can help myself". I have a long way to go but after watching this, I feel grateful and heard. Thank you as always 💜
She’s low-key psychic i swear
Literally needed it today
I was crying the whole day for no reason
You are my saviour 🙌 ❤️
this entire video sooke to me in ways no other person on this planet could ever comprehend to me, i love you thank you. i literally am lola, i cried today because i am always making sure i have plans with anyone but life had other plans and everyone i know had to moved to another city, and i have no one right now but myself and my family. I am completely alone!
Can't thank you enough for dropping the needed video at the exact time ❤
TYSM FOR UPLOADING THE RIGHT VIDEO AT THE RIGHT TIME! 😭💕
Your makeup look in this video is absolutely stunning. I think I might get inspiration from it next time I do my makeup
how tam tell me howwwwww you always and always have the best and perfect timings to post a vid 😭 it was just yesterday i was not feeling ok and lonely and was overthinking till today and this video is here. thank you so much tam you don't know how much you have done for me. keep going and keep inspiring i love you🫀
Dear Tam, thank you so much for this.. It came at the right time seriously like.. Seriously! Last Thursday I was breaking down about it in my therapist session because I was struggling with things and I'm always lonely and she suggested that I should do something that as a reward so I right away once she said that I remembered the solo date videos you keep telling us to do.. Not gonna lie I was always scared of the idea but decided to go for a solo date to the natural history museum because I've always wanted to go but never wanted to be alone and people I'm around never were into museums and OH MY GOODNESS I LOVED EVERY SECTION EVERY PART AND EVERYTHING AND I CAN'T BELIEVE I WAITED SO LONG TO NOT GO JUST BECAUSE NONE IS GOING... I can NOT believe how much it changed me and I'm definitely not gonna wait for people and miss opportunities because of it.. It was beautiful and for the first time in a while I realized I'm actually loving, enjoying and living in the exact moment I'm in 💕 and then took myself to a café...not gonna lie I just stuck to my phone scrolling and looking busy then payed real quick and ran away as if someone called me lol because it felt a little weird to me since it's the first time I'm trying to do this but you know what? I'll still going to push through it and do it again and be more comfortable about it and probably going to bring a journal next time or a book to read 📖... I'm still learning to love myself and I'm seeing some progress so please never stop posting videos because they're so helpful and we seriously love you... Wish you happiness that's double or triple the one you give us ❤️
Thank you tam!! You're the bigger sister everyone needs
Tam always coming through for us❤️!
Congratulations on hitting 700K Tam!! 😍 you deserve this and more! ♥
Tam your content NEVER disappoints giiirrrrl! I love these tips
This is exactly how I'm feeling nowadays.....and tam's videos always come at the right time. Thank you so much gurl for always pulling us out from our lowest state...gotta start prioritizing myself♥
thank you so much tam❤️ i really needed this💞
I think it's time to go on a solo date, girlsssss🍷
Youre an angel Tam. Truly the embodiment of 'Be the change you want to see in the world.' You are the only person on youtube who actually helps with self help and problem solving. For that im immensely grateful. It feels almost impossible to me how some random stranger who i chanced upon understands my inner mindsets and thought processes, the experiences that I go through so specifically. It almost feels like we have the same brain. So glad i can get uplifted and motivated from your videos. Thank you
🥺🥺♥️♥️
OMG!! How does Tam always know what I need to watch at a given time and somehow makes a video about it??!
Thanks a lot for everything you do Tam. I've been watching your videos for quite a time now and they have immensely helped me. I just watched your lucky girl syndrome video a while ago. I've been practicing what you suggested. I'm hopeful that I'll be able to manifest my dreams the right way. Thanks a again. Take love❤
The amount of respect and prayers you deserve is immense. You saved my life tam
It's crazy how inspiring you are and how much I love you.❤
Thankyou tam for being here for us always ❤
Thank you for reading out my response to the form you shared. It means a lot. I feel so honoured. THANKS A LOT TAM!!
This video came out exactly when I needed to hear it , Thank you Tam x
Just when I needed it! Love you Tam ❤️
Literally what i need rn✨ thankyou tam❤️
You are my literal grace sister... thankyou for being in my life tam..ilysm❤❤
Right on time as usual Tam! I’ve been feeling so lonely these past few days and I’m working to pull myself out of it. Brb gotta take notes on this one!
Really helpful advice, never saw being alone as a positive. Thanks Tam.
lord , I LOVE THIS GIRL SO MUCHHH!!!!
This video was lit Tam!!
Tam, please can u make a video of how to begin the self-development journey? Please please pleaseee!! Like, from the teeny tiniest thing🥺❤️
I knew what i needed. So without thinking twice i just came here and like always she gave the best advice, this is what i actually needed. Now i can start my day with a peaceful and position mind.
How can u have such a perfect timing gurll?❤❤❤
Really needed this one💋
From last 2 days i have been feeling so alone and lonely i never felt like this before like truly thanks tam i needed this soooo much❤️
oh Tam, your timing never fails! xx
Thank u tam for being a saviour ,being a doctor still I can say u give the best medicine for people’s mental health
It's called divine timing ❤ your teachings are divinely blessed dear Tamanna ❤
just started uni and this was exactly what i needed everyone say thank you tam
NEEDED this !!! 😩‼️
Tam, you're amazing, and to everyone in the comments section who is dealing with loneliness, hang in there, sisters; you all are amazing, and we're gonna get through this.
girl knows what to post exactly when i need this
this video is exactly what I needed right now, thank you tam. I have a 5 day break from school rn and I have been feeling lonely and not well for other reasons - I am quite acquainted already with the solutions you mentioned, nevertheless it gave me motivation to do these things and handle loneliness the right way (the Athena way B))
Love you Tam from the bottom of my heart
JUST WHAT I NEEDED TODAY THANKYOUU TAM
I was literally crying and sobbing in my room alone and I wished that Tam you made a video about loneliness🤞💖. Thank YOU so much for your guidance, knowledge and blessings filled within a video🙏🏻✨👑. I really wish a really peaceful, healthy and fulfilling life ahead🌺🦋✨🕊️.
Hey Tam!! I really love your videos. They've helped me out so much and made me a better person than I was.can we please have a video about how to stop oversharing and live a private life.love you so much!!❤❤
Yesss girl this is 🔥!!! Sending you so much love ❤
I love your conversational videos so much, because your own experience really help me to deal with lots of problems❤
Tam how do you always make the perfect video for the exact challenge I'm going through the moment you post it?
Very good audio quality...Nice video TK!
This video showed up at the right time in my life. I needed hear this❤
I just broke up from a 5 year relationship, I woke up and I wanted to listen to you so bad. Thank you 💕🩷
I come here and watch your videos whenever I'm not feeling my best self, because you just lift up my motivation and I realise how better I can be! So thank you so much, Tam! ❤️ Love from India, xoxo💖
well girl u have no idea how much i got motivated, understood and related myself from this worthy video seriously 💗 THIS WAS SOMETHING I REALLY NEEDED BAE 😻THANKSSSSSSSS GURL 💙💙💙💙
I NEEDED THIS RN!!
OMG....I literally needed this cz was having a mental break down yesterday after feeling reaaally lonely and I literally couldn't stuff it away...this helped me understand things sooo much better...thank you
I'm so happy to notice that I resonated completely with Athena and not Lola for the first time and that, I think, is an achievement
I'm proud of myself for finally loving her time alone, WITHOUT feeling lonely
you're a lifesaving angel tam omg bless you
Omggg Thank u girllll I REALLY REALLY NEEDED THIS..😭❤❤❤
Thank you, I really needed that. ♡
I NEEDED THIS !!! and guess what has just happened ! our saviour Tam came up with a great another video 💜💜💜💥💥
pleaseeee it's so slay how u always end up posting the videos where u talk about challenges we are facing at the moment 😭🫂🩷🌷
Your Videos are making my life so much better! Thank you for all the work and effort you put in all of your amazing videos ❤
you save my life, honestly
HOW DOES SHE ALWAYS KNOW WHAT I NEED ❤❤❤
You are single-handedly providing me free therapy at the right times. Grateful for you 😢
Needed to see this kind of video from you! Living abroad by myself and constantly being surrounded by people/"friends" I felt I couldn't be fully myself around and hanging out just to get by life so I don't fully drown in a really struggling part of my life made me lose myself and doubt myself beyond I can even express. I constantly feel that there is no one like me around even in a city as big as New York. I feel anxious being at social events with new people and its always such down drag seeing stranger couples being all cute and in love in public when I feel so helpless and crying inside because I haven't found anyone I can at least rely on. It has been a loop of loneliness, helplessness with a little hanging out with lame people just to keep myself alive.
Time to join gym again and get out of the fucking loop and lose myself from the grip of people's energy who don't see the value in me. I am a high value girl currently covered in dirt and grime. I will build myself from here. I have to. I hope time favours me from here. At least something favours me so I feel a lil push of a positive wind behind me.
No-one deserves to feel this way and I pray anyone struggling with this find the brightest way out of this♥
All the best. Rooting for you.
Am also going through that living in abroad for education. It has been months and I understand what you are going through. I hope you will happy by yourself and find real friends who care about you
You give such big sister energy, gonna go on that solo date tomorrow after college 🫡
This is such an important topic, we appreciate it ❤
omfg!! i def needed this... Because at this time I am the only one who has my back. Thanks a lot for Tam, ily
THE QUEEN POSTED
Omg I needed this vid 😭
Love this video Tam ❤
Loved this video - great balance of calling out vs calling in! As a 20 something who moved to NYC in 2020 alone, it’s been a newer struggle but this video (+ your energy) provided great perspective and action items 🫶🏾