THE DARK SIDE OF FAMILY: What Happens When Dark Empaths Exist Within?

Поділитися
Вставка
  • Опубліковано 16 чер 2024
  • The dark side of family can be displayed through a dark empath personality type.
    Evil in families can be very complicated, difficult to spot, and almost impossible to avoid.
    Who wants to believe that their family members are evil?
    And how do you identify them and protect yourself from them?
    It's one thing to have an evil relationship with friends, coworkers, and lovers.
    But it's another thing to be related to them and feel obligated -- because of social or family judgements -- to make the relationship work.
    Through this live chat, I will offer 11 ways to protect yourself from evil family members.
    --------------------------------------------------------------------------------
    DISCUSSED IN THIS VIDEO:
    0:00 intro
    2:22 why we should talk about this topic
    7:49 what you may be seeing within your family
    8:11 motivational conflict (i.e. family secrets, lies, and covered up happenings may lead you to feel multiple motivations )
    10:40 cyclic interactions (there is a pattern of toxic behaviors)(abuse cycle)
    11:25 empathy deficits (limited, non-existent, inconsistent)
    12:58 sub-clinical symptoms (i.e., symptoms of a disorder that doesn't meet full diagnostic criteria, even though the symptoms may be categorized as problematic)
    13:19 machevalianism
    16:09 ask yourself "do my interactions within my family leave me feeling silenced?"
    17:02 "do you think family is everything?" (my answer)
    28:16 barriers to understanding dark behaviors within the family (barriers that are built into the dynamic of the family)
    51:10 11 tips you need
    ***There is Q&A between the content
    ----------------------------------------------------------------------
    #trauma #darkempaths
    #tamarahilllpc #EVILRELATIONSHIPS
    ----------------------------------------------------------------------
    Mentioned In The Video:
    1. People with Dark Triad Traits Become Parents
    www.psychologytoday.com/us/bl...
    2. Study of families finds evidence of intergenerational transmission of Dark Triad traits and emotional reactivity www.psypost.org/2022/11/study...
    3. Cycle of abuse/power and control wheel www.thehotline.org/identify-a...
    -------------------------------------------------------------------------
    Suggestions from viewers:
    1. Dr. Scott Peck’s book “People of The Lie”
    2. Dr. George Simon's book In Sheep's Clothing
    3. Dr. Lillan Glass entitled "Toxic People: Toxic People: 10 Ways Of Dealing With People Who Make Your Life Miserable "
    -----------------------
    ***RESEARCH:
    1. The science of "being bad" www.psychologytoday.com/us/bl...
    2. The Psychological Power of Satan: www.scientificamerican.com/ar...
    3. What do we mean when we talk about "evil" blog.apaonline.org/2022/10/14...
    ----------------------
    ****THE AMYGDALA AS A FLASHLIGHT
    1.www.health.harvard.edu/stayin...
    2. www.webmd.com/brain/amygdala-...
    -----------------------------------------------------------------------
    SUBSCRIBE for more videos: 👩‍💻
    / tamarahtherapist
    *New videos Wednesday, Friday and/or Sunday, EST.
    -----------------------------------------------------------------------
    Music:
    ----------------------------------
    🎵 Track Info:
    Epidemic Sound
    -----------------------------------------------------------------
    DISCLAIMER:
    *Videos are provided for exploration and educational purposes only and does not constitute clinical suggestions or consultation for individual cases.
    If you or someone you know is having a medical emergency involving harm to self, please reach out to the suicide prevention hotline suicidepreventionlifeline.org/.
    ----------------------------------------------------------------
    ----Contact me-------(BUSINESS INQUIRIES ONLY)
    I'm Támara, a licensed and internationally/Board certified trauma mental health therapist, with over 14 years experience. I specialize in helping children, teens, and families with mental illness. I also treat psychological/emotional trauma in children, teens, and adults.
    If you'd like to contact me or inquire about my international consultations, you may email me at contact@anchoredinknowledge.com. *Please note: all consultations are charged a fixed rate fee based on the case content.
    Mail me stuff!
    PO BOX 15747
    Robinson Township, PA 15244
    *FOLLOW ME ON SOCIAL MEDIA:
    Twitter - / therapisttee
    Website - www.anchoredinknowledge.com
    Instagram: thilltherap...
    ______________________________________
    Copyright © All rights reserved.
    Permission must be given before videos are used.

КОМЕНТАРІ • 107

  • @TherapistTamaraHill
    @TherapistTamaraHill  6 місяців тому +7

    Do you believe your sibling is a pathological liar? Check out my live chat here: ua-cam.com/users/liveCqTKNGBLfDE?si=ItUQxOZSxWc2S6OR
    👇
    --------
    Books on family estrangement
    1. www.amazon.com/Done-Crying-Healing-Estranged-Children/dp/0997352205/ref=asc_df_0997352205/?tag=hyprod-20&linkCode=df0&hvadid=312168414377&hvpos=&hvnetw=g&hvrand=6494742542413456374&hvpone=&hvptwo=&hvqmt=&hvdev=m&hvdvcmdl=&hvlocint=&hvlocphy=9005949&hvtargid=pla-434078753270&psc=1&mcid=c055c0f9422736b6a1eb2a59c6be08ec&gclid=CjwKCAiA9ourBhAVEiwA3L5RFqUgROZCCjo91h-Jxh1DlG3jjzUsIknenZHyh-2T1vTmxbrkqX-NZRoCj94QAvD_BwE
    2. www.amazon.com/Forgiving-What-You-Cant-Forget/dp/1400225191/ref=asc_df_1400225191/?tag=hyprod-20&linkCode=df0&hvadid=563715217888&hvpos=&hvnetw=g&hvrand=6494742542413456374&hvpone=&hvptwo=&hvqmt=&hvdev=m&hvdvcmdl=&hvlocint=&hvlocphy=9005949&hvtargid=pla-1008017094157&psc=1&mcid=64e23a757f2936b091c586e6be9db9b1

    • @OrahLoves
      @OrahLoves 6 місяців тому +3

      Hi! Is there a usual day and time for the live videos? I would like to put it on my calendar. Thank you so much for this very knowledgeable and beneficial information, Tamara!
      I am a scapegoat / lost child by the way.

    • @TherapistTamaraHill
      @TherapistTamaraHill  6 місяців тому +2

      @@OrahLoves Hi there, yes, absolutely! Every Friday after 6pm and sometimes Saturday after 6pm. Saturdays only happen if something comes up in my schedule. Otherwise, I stick to Fridays. I welcome you!!
      And yes, you're welcome. Very glad to hear this is helpful. :)
      The lost child and scapegoat family roles are typically the "smarter" ones in the family that everyone misunderstands. I might do a specific video on this at some point real soon.

  • @thepurplediva2957
    @thepurplediva2957 5 місяців тому +13

    Family members (especially aunts, uncles, and cousins) can have festering resentments that began when you were just a little kid. It can take middle age to finally reach the epiphany. They secretly compete against you and wil even wish harm to ypu, your marriage, or career

    • @TherapistTamaraHill
      @TherapistTamaraHill  5 місяців тому +5

      I don't disagree. I see this a lot, much more than I care to admit.

    • @fifilafleur5555
      @fifilafleur5555 Місяць тому +1

      Yes!!!! This is my aunt & uncle and **several** cousins!!! Jealousy??? I was raised by my grandparents & very close to them growing up. I think I had family members who resented me for that. I’m fairly certain. Also for just being me and not liking me. I found out after my grandparents passed just how much they disliked me. They sided with my abusers against me!

  • @susanfronk6632
    @susanfronk6632 5 місяців тому +10

    I really like what Phoenix said about family members who demonstrate empathy when it’s convenient!

  • @giao2380
    @giao2380 6 місяців тому +26

    I’m here. Barely here but I’m here. My family doesn’t even bother to invite me to ANY gatherings anymore. Like no mention at all. I don’t see how any family member could just flat out avoid a person especially when they know they suffer from mental health issues. Pretty pathetic and sad. Yes! They LOVE and STRIVE off of chaos. They aren’t normal unless they are argumentative. I’m the empath. I’m the black sheep. I’m the “good” one who kept giving chances. I’m suffering for it now. And yes I feel like the victim and I hate feeling sorry for myself. 2 sisters and 2 brothers, my mom. They are ALL evil. They all live in the same city so that’s probably it. Yes, I have to be completely silenced and never open my mouth about anything or they’ll call me crazy and off hinge. They all need deep help.

    • @TherapistTamaraHill
      @TherapistTamaraHill  6 місяців тому +6

      I'm so sorry. Stand strong until the end.
      I've had clients like this in the past and the issue was either that they weren't the healthy person to be around because of their mental health issues and/or the family was completely unhinged and unhealthy themselves. Sometimes a little of both. Either way, you have to stand strong and the less you engage them, the better. Perhaps they will turn around or change their own behaviors OR perhaps you can finally have the peace of mind you need or want. You deserve that!
      I'll be covering this topic in the next few chats as well!

  • @sandrathomas2893
    @sandrathomas2893 5 місяців тому +7

    Narcissists bamboozle the therapists like a super power!

    • @TherapistTamaraHill
      @TherapistTamaraHill  2 місяці тому +2

      Sometimes they do! That's the sad part because sometimes good therapists are deceived. This kind of personality isn't always easy to spot.

    • @fifilafleur5555
      @fifilafleur5555 Місяць тому +1

      This has happened to me twice in therapy with 2 different therapists. An uncle & ex husband were able to charm the therapist against me and the real issues were never addressed. I left the session in tears with ex husband while he smiled smugly. Both therapists had PhDs and had absolutely no understanding of narcissism in families or spouses. This was back in the 90s. I was told I was the one in the marriage who was most likely cheating since I had accused my husband!!! I hired a P.I. and my husband was caught first day on job with a subordinate at his office! I later learned there was other women and affairs throughout our marriage and before I never knew about. I never cheated once!!!! 🤬🤬🤬🤬🤬🤬🤬🤬🤬

  • @susanfronk6632
    @susanfronk6632 5 місяців тому +7

    Thank you for helping realize why I have not be able to hash things out with my daughter who it is clear has been “sucked into” the dysfunctional and generational family quicksand of our family’s generational trauma field by dark empathy

  • @Yolduranduran
    @Yolduranduran 6 місяців тому +10

    Thank you. No one wants to call it like it is. That makes the abuse worst like it's not that big of a deal. Yes, it is DARK!!!

  • @libertycan6959
    @libertycan6959 6 місяців тому +15

    Lol I've dealt with a family full of toxicity who all are passive aggressive but they are grinning and smirking and pushing the buttons... not the passive aggressive you'd think... sneaky as snakes generationally. I stir my soup as I ruminate in reactive trauma isolated trying to make sense of all the insanity slamming an occasional door or talking to myself as I mentally go back through the years waking up to my enlightenment of my journey of toxic family narcissism and my roll as a lifelong scapegoat.
    Get well soon Dr Tamara 🙏🏼🙏🏼🙏🏼

    • @MichaelRyanEpley
      @MichaelRyanEpley 6 місяців тому +1

      Not that you asked, but I suggest you limit the time you spend in that limerant state where time compresses or expands and you relive past emotional memories. The emotional dysregulation that goes along with limerance is tantamount to an addictive drug.
      Root yourself back in present reality. Remind yourself you are a human being like any other, you simply have different needs as a result of your particular conditioning.
      Define those needs felt in this physical reality. Make a list of your needs and wants. Then live into that.

  • @user-qf9ll7qe5q
    @user-qf9ll7qe5q 6 місяців тому +6

    What about family members that create an environment where your autonomy is no longer present? I’m thirty and no matter when I make a decision I am never allowed to. My parents will interfere directly and blatantly tell me I’m not doing that or will go around me. They have everything tied to them so they can “help me” but I pay many of their bills now. They call me if I’m not home within exactly 30 min the time it takes to drive home from work, go through my phone when I sleep etc and with religion if I do not do what they ask I am told things like “I am born of Satan because I’m too evil to be from them”

    • @TherapistTamaraHill
      @TherapistTamaraHill  6 місяців тому +1

      Good question. That's a tough uphill climb and sometimes it may require some distance from that family member and a number of boundaries being put up before the message is clear that you need space. That's not always possible in families where the dynamics are difficult.

    • @fifilafleur5555
      @fifilafleur5555 Місяць тому

      Get out. Get out as fast as you can. Those parents (who are the evil ones) will steal your entire life if you let them. I come from a family that is very very similar. They have nearly destroyed me. This is serious. Get out now and have the autonomy & life you deserve. They will not change… and you will be so sad when you wake up one day… are no longer young… have missed precious opportunities you will never have again… and they have ruined your life. Some of these types of parents will even try to control from the grave… long after they’re gone… by their wills. Please realize you deserve a life of your own and put to yourself first.
      From someone who has lived it! 🩵

  • @dnk4559
    @dnk4559 6 місяців тому +25

    Thank you Tamara for discussing the truth that evil exists. I read Dr. Scott Peck’s book “People of The Lie” that was written back in the seventies or eighties. In the book he discusses examples of evil but it’s clear his findings never really took off. The book has so much truth and like you explain, acknowledges that psychology has a hard time facing the existence of evil.

    • @TherapistTamaraHill
      @TherapistTamaraHill  6 місяців тому +3

      You're welcome! And thank you for watching this. It's an important topic, as you know, and we (those of us who have gone to school for years to be leaders or authoritative in our fields of human behavior, need to get better at this and talk.
      I just typed that book into my search engine. I will certainly check this out. Thank you for bringing this up. I will post it in the description box for others.

    • @user-fl3rc6nv4x
      @user-fl3rc6nv4x 6 місяців тому +6

      Hi I too read People of the Lie, it might seem we weren’t ready to receive this book back then. I think it is so appropriate from my experience for today God bless. Carol N.I.

    • @user-fl3rc6nv4x
      @user-fl3rc6nv4x 6 місяців тому +2

      Thank you Tamara certainly true in my family thanks Carol N.I.

    • @bodymindsoul60
      @bodymindsoul60 6 місяців тому +3

      Excellent book, I’m so happy Tamara is shedding more light on this!

    • @MichaelRyanEpley
      @MichaelRyanEpley 6 місяців тому +1

      Evil is what happens when ignorance is allowed to act. That is all it is.

  • @susanfronk6632
    @susanfronk6632 5 місяців тому +3

    Not sure who said this but I’ve come to believe that “When the student is ready the teacher appears”.
    I am the student who is ready, and your channel, Tamara, appeared

  • @susanfronk6632
    @susanfronk6632 5 місяців тому +3

    Love the reference to the iconic book, “People of the Lie” by M Scott Peck
    Regrettably, it’s been quoted by one of my closest family members who hold up a shield of religiosity while she flagrantly inflicts abuse upon anyone who dares to raise any hint of a complaint about her behavior

  • @Plantsorcats
    @Plantsorcats 6 місяців тому +3

    Drastically needing how to deal with daughter-in-laws who either treat me with disdain or cause drama through manipulation and lying. I have tried so hard to be loving and kind. Now there is so much drama that I can't understand. I have prayed, been submissive, over bought gifts, tried to draw them into conversations or steered them away from conversations. Between the two I am literally torn apart. I don't know to deal with these two women in our family. Hel

  • @KS-dx5ln
    @KS-dx5ln 6 місяців тому +7

    My mother is passive aggressive, blames and shames everyone when she causes the drama and chaos. Wait until her flying monkeys who worship her find out about how she has done nothing but talk sh*t about all of them. She cannot have an adult conversation with anyone about her issues/problems with anyone. She plays the poor me martyr. I have tried many times to talk to her. I got hung up on and ignored. She knows she's mentally ill and wrong. So she smears me and plays her triangulation, gas lighting and evil ways. I'm not her only victim. Everyone she's around is her victim.

    • @christinelamb1167
      @christinelamb1167 2 місяці тому +2

      Sounds a lot like my mother, except besides being passive/aggressive she will flip-flop to actively aggressive, when she thinks the situation calls for it. 4 years ago at the age of 56, I had finally had enough of her abuse. I went completely no-contact, and it has been 4 years of peace! It's sad to realize that a person will never, ever change, and it is hopeless and futile to keep trying to make the relationship work, because it never will. But that realization allowed me to break free and find some peace. But it is not always possible to go no contact, especially with family members. It's not always necessary, either. But in my case it was necessary to save my own sanity!

    • @fifilafleur5555
      @fifilafleur5555 Місяць тому

      This is my bio mother, paternal grandmother & my dad’s second & third wives. They triangulate/triangulated and lied through their teeth about me. 😢😢😢 Their “monkeys” were quick to believe all their lies about me. I simply could never get anyone to hear my side of things. I finally just gave up and have stayed away.

  • @citizenkang2524
    @citizenkang2524 6 місяців тому +4

    Multiple no contact, no narcissist supply by 15.

  • @VannaE
    @VannaE 6 місяців тому +8

    Reading the comments, I did challenge the members of my family as a child all the way up until I could physically distance. I don’t necessarily think that was a good thing to do but that’s what I did. What I have noticed is that I’ve always protected the head one if I could call it that, I feel like it’s like the kidnapping situation where people are bonded. But I’m not sure. As a nine-year-old I knew I would write a book once the head one was no longer here. The focus that got me through was that the book would be about how I coped and what I tried, and what really helped so I hope to inspire others. That was the way I coped. That person is still here but I’m starting to write it. It’s so gut, wrenching and soul destroying sometimes I don’t want another person lost because it wasn’t their fault who their parents were. Much love to anyone going through this or who has gone through it please know you’re never alone. Although I wish it never existed it does. We can make it. We are making it. We deserve our own life free of them. ❤

  • @susanfronk6632
    @susanfronk6632 5 місяців тому +4

    Love the distinction you made Tamara between the subtle but very significant difference between cognitive and effective empathy

  • @raquel_rose
    @raquel_rose 6 днів тому

    5:46 The vestibular testing and that follow the tiny X on the lollipop stick at therapy takes me out! Get well!! Lots of crossword puzzles helped me. I’m at year two post-concussion

  • @Elizabethpepper8
    @Elizabethpepper8 4 місяці тому +5

    My family is religious. They avoid anything to do with the past by shaming amd spiritual bypassing. The level of denial is unbelievable.
    My attenpts to understand and heal my severe traums has been met with tbr attitude "i need to move on from the past- it isnt healthy.
    , i must forgive and go to jesus as he heals all." Its absolutely sickening. Im covinced they wont acknowledge the things that were done to me as that would mean facing their part in ignoring it. Cowards.

  • @Gean-co6pv
    @Gean-co6pv 4 дні тому

    TH ..... I'M SO APPRECIATIVE FOR FINDING YOUR CHANNEL.
    MY FAMILY HAS BEEN TORN APART BY A NARCISSIST CHILD.
    AND I'M STRUGGLING WITH SO MANY UNRESOLVED MENTAL CONCERNS .
    NEEDLESS TO SAY, WITH THE AGING PROCESS MY PHYSICAL BODY IS STARTING TO FEEL THE BRUNT OF IT ...
    MY MEDICAL DOCTOR IS SAYING THAT SOME OF MY PAIN MAY BE PSYCHOLOGICAL ..... BECAUSE OF UNRESOLVED ISSUES ...
    EVEN THOUGH I'M TRYING TO LOVE FROM A DISTANCE...
    BUT HEAVEN HELP ME.... MY BODY IS ACTUALLY EXPERIENCING NUMBNESS .... EVEN PHYSICAL EXERCISE IS FEELING HARMFUL.
    Thank you TH ...❤❤❤❤
    I've always done the same thing to my window blinds ....
    I'm going to try and find you live .... What's your times

  • @shawndritahodges9845
    @shawndritahodges9845 6 місяців тому +6

    This is good, keep educating the people Tamara. Sometimes we are experiencing these behaviors in our dysfunctional families and think its normal, afraid to speak up or no its wrong and can't put a name to the evil behaviors.

    • @TherapistTamaraHill
      @TherapistTamaraHill  6 місяців тому +4

      🤗Thank you! I certainly will keep pushing forward. You guys are my motivation. And I agree! We become very "brainwashed" sometimes with the concept of family.

  • @thirtyyearcosmetologist
    @thirtyyearcosmetologist 19 днів тому +1

    Wow just wow. This is the language I could never express. I always knew these things were happening I just did not have the understanding. I think I can now truly heal and keep my distance from my family.My parents were evil.Their approval was conditional and transactional. They were only happy when they were getting money from me and their mood would change when I could not give them money.

    • @TherapistTamaraHill
      @TherapistTamaraHill  19 днів тому

      Yes, I understand. A lot of people struggle with verbalizing these things -- especially in a societal belief that "you don't go against your family." I'm sorry you feel you have experienced this chaotic dynamic.

  • @curtishutcherson2472
    @curtishutcherson2472 6 місяців тому +3

    My girl, "home run T Hill" hitting home runs and dropping jewels out on me and the world. You should be blessed and I know you will big with love out of Smyrna TN ❤

  • @MilosPor
    @MilosPor 6 місяців тому +3

    Please do a video about the difference between affective and cognitive empathy

  • @melliecrann-gaoth4789
    @melliecrann-gaoth4789 6 місяців тому +6

    👏Thanksgiving done and dusted.

    • @TherapistTamaraHill
      @TherapistTamaraHill  6 місяців тому +4

      That is true! Some people are "really" glad about that. I can't blame them once you consider all of the dark meaning and history behind it. It's beautiful to be thankful but that's about it.

  • @ZuzuBell
    @ZuzuBell 6 місяців тому +6

    Please do the chat in cognitive Empathy.

  • @pepperjones7559
    @pepperjones7559 6 місяців тому +3

    In area of teaching people how to read there is an idea that some people are functionally illiterate. The idea is that the person can read small words (letters below a certain count/simple words). Maybe the narcissist is functionally narcissistic thereby having definitions that fall outside of normal range and isn’t easily identified. P. S … I miss seeing your program. God bless your health, your holiday period and New Year 2024.

  • @Smartbeatifulawesome
    @Smartbeatifulawesome Місяць тому

    I don’t know I’m exhausted too. I’m constantly abused and mistreated. And people on the outside I think it is overwhelming. Now they call my daughter ugly and dumb. I have no control over any of it my ex husband is abusive as well.

  • @flowerjade5938
    @flowerjade5938 2 місяці тому +1

    This was an eye opener wow. Thank you. You’ve made me realize my own role in the dysfunctions. I am in a subgroup and have been wanting to disengage. I will now.

    • @TherapistTamaraHill
      @TherapistTamaraHill  2 місяці тому +1

      You're welcome! I'm glad this was helpful. Join me live on Friday 6pm if you'd like to catch me live.

  • @slimdusty6328
    @slimdusty6328 6 місяців тому +2

    Empathy in our family was tied-to whether we remained in the extreme fundamentalist Christian cult, or not. It was able to be turned off and on, like turning on and off a tap. This way of being was the main demands within the group our families were born into. It had little to do with personal choice. As generally nobody from outside of this group ever chose to join up. Children were just born into it. Once they were there, from there on out everyone was groomed to be well aware of how empathy was turned off and on, like a tap. When anyone didn't toe the line, of rules and regulations approved by the hierarchy, they'd stand to be promptly thrown out, like as if throwing out the trash. Shunned as if they'd died and been buried. Anytime the followers got their hands on someone who'd left and died through suicide, they'd have their coffin dragged along the ground to the grave side, rather than carried. As a last form of shunning and degradation, a move what also doubled up to serve as a type of warning, to cult-family and other onlookers who'd still remain to be members within the group.
    Straight up

    • @Onelove858
      @Onelove858 6 місяців тому +1

      Sad! I believe u ! Blessings to U! Be Well !

  • @karenkilbane8043
    @karenkilbane8043 4 місяці тому +4

    I just found you a few weeks ago and really appreciate how helpful your content is. You are a lovely person as well. Thank you!

    • @TherapistTamaraHill
      @TherapistTamaraHill  4 місяці тому +1

      Thank you so much!🤗 Very glad to hear this this channel is helpful to you.

  • @AdamantlyAdams
    @AdamantlyAdams 6 місяців тому +2

    Hello Tamara. I'm getting over flu, starting to feel better today. Last week I had the booster and the RSV vaccine. Less than a week and I fell ill. Feeling much better as I watched your video. Thank you Tamara for everything

    • @TherapistTamaraHill
      @TherapistTamaraHill  6 місяців тому +1

      You are welcome!!
      Feel better. My mom just had the flu and it was terrible. Praying for you to recover sooner than later. :)

    • @AdamantlyAdams
      @AdamantlyAdams 6 місяців тому +1

      @@TherapistTamaraHill Thanks Tamara. I'm taking it easy

    • @TherapistTamaraHill
      @TherapistTamaraHill  6 місяців тому

      You're welcome! That's good to hear.

  • @JKDVIPER
    @JKDVIPER 2 місяці тому +1

    7:02 I like your earrings. Those are nice, different. Cool. These chats always help.

    • @TherapistTamaraHill
      @TherapistTamaraHill  2 місяці тому +1

      Thank you!! And I'm glad this was helpful. I welcome you to one of my live chats if you are ever able to catch them!

    • @JKDVIPER
      @JKDVIPER 2 місяці тому

      @@TherapistTamaraHill absolutely sounds good!

  • @bridgettetraveler658
    @bridgettetraveler658 6 місяців тому +2

    ALS helped my mother become a much nicer person. She needed ppl to take care of her so she became a better person. My dad died & never changed. The last time I talked to him he was fussing & trying to make me feel bad. I don't miss him at all. I've had nice dreams about my mother, but dad the last dream I had about him I woke myself up getting ready to punch him in his mouth. I know that sounds awful but he's driven me to that point!!!

    • @TherapistTamaraHill
      @TherapistTamaraHill  6 місяців тому +1

      Oh no, I completely understand why you are the way you are about your father. A lot of people don't recognize that there isn't always mourning at death in all families. It's okay to be honest about that!
      And I'm glad you point out that sometimes medical (and even mental health) conditions can cause some to become nicer. In very toxic families, medical or mental health conditions are often the trigger to developing better relationships with family members.

    • @dannacollins2520
      @dannacollins2520 6 місяців тому

      I doubt she changed. It was all manipulation.

  • @susanfronk6632
    @susanfronk6632 5 місяців тому +2

    OMG - I found your channel just in time. So, thank you Tamara!

  • @kandeedee2913
    @kandeedee2913 4 місяці тому +1

    We came across your channel. We enjoy watching your videos. You and your videos are outstanding and spot on Tamara. Thank you. Blessings to you always.

    • @TherapistTamaraHill
      @TherapistTamaraHill  4 місяці тому

      Thank you so much! Blessings to you too. And I'm very glad this channel is helpful to you!

  • @giao2380
    @giao2380 6 місяців тому +6

    Sorry for all of the posts- I’m writing as I watch the video. Wouldn’t completely ignoring a family member be a form of abuse? Could it be that we are too empathetic that they don’t want you around? They are narcs and jealous and toxic that they can’t handle an empathic person? I can see it all and address it but they can’t handle the truth.
    Yes I want to tell my family how I feel but I’m afraid they’ll tell me to hush. And why hang out with a family member when you have to be fake? Drive 8 hour round trip to be fake? No thanks. And yes! My nister feels like she’s conquered world peace when she hurts me. She smiles and acts accomplished. Soooo weird. She says, “No one messes with me! I always get my way. I will one up you! I love when people kiss my a$$. I deserve better than you! Why you and not me??? Poor me!” She sees it as a personal responsibility of hers to hurt me.

    • @dnk4559
      @dnk4559 6 місяців тому +4

      I’m so sorry! You are wise to keep distance from this sort of family dynamic!

    • @TherapistTamaraHill
      @TherapistTamaraHill  6 місяців тому +4

      You don't have to apologize! I understand. :)
      I would say the process of "completely ignoring" a family member would have to be based on a few things such as :
      does this person create problems for me and triangulate?
      does this person not respect my space and therefore needs me to reinforce my boundaries?
      does this person serve as the "leader" of a clique in this family?
      does this family member abuse me in ways that would be defined as abuse -- the legal definition?
      If all of your answers are "yes," then I would say you are using a "line of defense" and creating new boundaries.
      I'm sorry you are going through this.

    • @recoveringsoul755
      @recoveringsoul755 6 місяців тому

      Yes I think it is abuse. Domestic violence can occur between siblings, child to parent, parent to child, gang against scapegoat. My children were abused along with me by my husband, my siblings know this, but all of them seem to have decided to shun me. My one sibling criticized how I raised my kids, but is now living with one of them at least and seems to have replaced me as their emergency contact with my child. Who is more easily controlled. I just want my sister back. I want my kids back too, but nobody can survive divorcing this evil alone like this. It's a death sentence. I have no one and won't live to my next birthday.
      Humans are social creatures and isolation of a decade isn't helping

    • @giao2380
      @giao2380 6 місяців тому +1

      @@recoveringsoul755I’m so sorry you went through this and still are. I have 4 siblings and a mom and two adult children. They all shun me. It hurts. Esp during the holidays. I used to think “no way they are all wrong and I’m right! They can’t all be wrong!” But let me tell you, there is much more evil in this world than light but light always wins. Don’t give up. I love you and I don’t even know you. But your words pain me to read because I understand. Keep up the fight for yourself. God bless you. You are beautiful.

  • @Yanadew
    @Yanadew 6 місяців тому +2

    Please do that Chat! It’s needed!

  • @Marie-ts8rp
    @Marie-ts8rp 6 місяців тому +2

    Happy Thanksgiving Tamara🌈🍊

  • @VannaE
    @VannaE 6 місяців тому +1

    I was making a list of all the 15 topics and I was going to press send after two of them and then decided it was probably unfair to do a spoiler for your video. After you asked if you covered 15 I wish I had done it lol because I didn’t count either. I think you covered all of them and more. I’m so grateful for you doing what you do after hours to help many of us and I love the group of people who come to the lives. The only thing I didn’t get to say in the live was I hope you’re feeling better every day. Thanks Doctor Tàm ❤

    • @TherapistTamaraHill
      @TherapistTamaraHill  6 місяців тому

      You're welcome.
      😅😂I knew I missed a few! But I'm glad this was still helpful to you. And I love the people on this channel too. I'm beyond blessed to have that.
      Thanks so much for the well wishes. I do feel better a little each day.❤

  • @thereugo8900
    @thereugo8900 6 місяців тому +1

    Tamara. I'm so sorry that I missed your live feed. I'm having Internet issues that have yet to be fixed. It works periodically 😢

    • @TherapistTamaraHill
      @TherapistTamaraHill  6 місяців тому +1

      Oh my goodness!! No apology necessary. I'm always glad when you guys join. I hope things get worked out. I had issues too this past week and it can be frustrating to say the least. Hope you had a peaceful holiday.

  • @susanfronk6632
    @susanfronk6632 5 місяців тому +1

    Yes Tamara yes

  • @samston
    @samston 6 місяців тому +1

    Family members that gaslight u

  • @susanfronk6632
    @susanfronk6632 5 місяців тому

    I’m not sure if your response to my comment was meant for me because I don’t recognize the word you used after mentioning Susan from Minnesota.
    I’m 74 years old and did not grow up understanding technology.
    Going forward, I will do my best to figure out what I need to learn in order to post my comments.

  • @H-youtube7
    @H-youtube7 6 місяців тому +2

    Dr Tamara digging up diamonds again.

  • @susanfronk6632
    @susanfronk6632 5 місяців тому +1

    Applause!

  • @user-qf9ll7qe5q
    @user-qf9ll7qe5q 6 місяців тому

    I am ashamed when I have any emotions because “emotions are for the weak” I got in trouble for being upset or crying. I have almost zero emotions now and feel extremely uncomfortable and confused when I become upset or feel anything now. Is that normal?

  • @peggydietz6148
    @peggydietz6148 6 місяців тому +2

    You r in Philadelphia?
    I’m considering coming with my daughter to see you …
    Would u be open to this .??

    • @TherapistTamaraHill
      @TherapistTamaraHill  6 місяців тому +1

      I am in the Monroeville area of PA. I have people drive in tfrom time to time so I welcome you. I am, however, booked up until early next year (January/February) for psychotherapy. Let me know what you decide. :)

  • @recoveringsoul755
    @recoveringsoul755 6 місяців тому +1

    How do i pull up the Livestream chat? I only see a Remix option and thats not it

    • @TherapistTamaraHill
      @TherapistTamaraHill  6 місяців тому

      I know...it's confusing! If you are looking at my video from a mobile phone, you would want to click on the section titled "comments" and slide to the left. You would then click on "live chat replay."
      Hope this helps!

    • @recoveringsoul755
      @recoveringsoul755 6 місяців тому

      I don't see comments. I have likes, dislikes, share, save etc. Is it there?

    • @TherapistTamaraHill
      @TherapistTamaraHill  6 місяців тому

      Yes. It should be right under that section. If not, I'm not sure what is going on there. I'm sorry!

  • @BBBmode80
    @BBBmode80 6 місяців тому +2

    🤣🤣🤣🤣🤣🤣🤣🤣🤣🤣🤣🤣 once they bite they will continue to do just that. Let the low vibrational beings continue to be, move on and raise your frequencies grow and keep going......

  • @ErinTheBartender42
    @ErinTheBartender42 6 місяців тому

    O

  • @yolandagrabowski6043
    @yolandagrabowski6043 6 місяців тому

    Religion is used as not not there for me.