I love this content! Just a quick note, YOU DON'T HAVE TO LOVE OR LIKE ALL WOMEN. In the end we are human, there are honest and dishonest people, good people and bad people, kind and rude people, this applies to men and women. The point is to realize that in many cases the rivalry we create between women is motivated by society and the media, from the movies we watch to the jokes or beliefs in our family, school or community.
oh god the shame surrounding wanting male validation is so real! especially when women judge other women for this despite the fact that subconsciously we all do the same! this vid was rly good and hit home, made me quite emotional and has made me realise how much more unlearning i gotta do :( but its okay, keep doing these vids they help so much!
U talking about how u had moments where u wanted validation from men but not liking it ,is so real cuz, I would tell myself how I want men to want me but then I’m like I don’t even like getting attention from men like that unless it’s a genuine friendship with them😭
A few days ago I had an “ah ha!” Moment and I realized that I was spending soooo much time and energy thinking about men and how they may perceive me. Since then I’ve been watching your videos every day, and it’s helping me so much on my journey of decentralizing men from my life. I’m already feeling so much more confident and fulfilled. Thank you for creating this safe community :)
Love your videos on decentering men and finding ways to validate yourself and your success. I thought I would “grow out of it” in my 30’s, but honestly, I did for a short time but it so easily creeps back in! As that pressure to find a man and settle down, OR if you don’t do that, then you need to be the “rich, hot, successful, single aunty type” - it really escalates even in your 30’s! So, you’re doing important work and impacting more people that you realise ❤
This is such a valuable comment - thank you so much for sharing your experience with me (I have no doubt many women in their 30's relate)! Feel free to share your thoughts or experiences anytime on this channel! xxxx Keep shining! 💖✨
It can be taken a step further and learn to not be drawn to do things for external validation from anyone. It's definitely a challenge but I find the more I train my brain to care less (which has naturally happened as I got older), the less stress I have and the happier I am in my daily life. The people who are meant to be in your life (and on the same wavelength) are then naturally drawn to you and you to them.
Seriously I was at a LESBIAN night with my masculine presenting, biologically male non binary friend. The amount of lesbians who flirted with them and tried desperately to gain their attention... shows how powerful the validation of the male gaze is!
YES YES YES I love it when womennnnn!!!! I really love ur content and happy ur talking about this but can I make a small suggestion to move the small plant in front of u? It’s just putting a barrier between us and you and it’s distracting me
I just want to say you are fantastic ! Keep going on this topic because you really help me and I’m sure a lot of us ! Don’t think that your content is « boring » cause you talk about the same thing cause you actually the first youtube creator that talk about feminism in that perspective : the men validation which is really taboo because all lot of women feel ashamed of. Indeed, I understood that I was touch by acting or looking a certain way to attract men because deep inside I was always taught that beauty only has value if a man looks at it. I discover that I was wrong thanks to my religion Islam which greatly honors women, ( even if the media wants you to believe otherwise) and also by discovering the concep of men validation. But no other youtube video talked as deeply about it as you do on your video. So please keep going you are doing an amazing job and I invite you today to compliment a woman on her work if she does it well. Love from france ❤️
Thank you so much for this video! It warms my heart to see women building each other up and supporting one another. Your channel is great! You are great!
Hey lovely! This comment has made my day! ❤❤❤Please do share your mums feedback with me - I'd love to know what she thought and felt ! Sending you so much love xx💘💘💘
Grateful to you mam first time I saw your video i thought like you are the kind of woman I was trying to find to stay in company with and I was going through a very hard time and i found your video
Omg Lessie I LOVE THIS! 👏🏼 ♥️ So so true and eye opening! Really resonated with the music thing! 😲 And JADORE the writing your own version of success exercise and the journal prompts 🥰 I am doing the journaling now 💌👏🏼 Your video came at the perfect time for me 🥹Wise words as always beautiful girl!!!!!♥️✨👏🏼
thank you so so much for all of your videos! I totally see myself in the things you're talking about and even though I'm very aware of my behavior, I often catch myself seeking male validation. Never believed in this "new year new me" stuff but leaving this internalized behavior behind kinda became one of my goals for 2024. And hearing your videos already helped me to collect my own thoughts and to make first steps in the direction I want to go!
I have always lived like i have an invisible husband watching my every decision and move... not fun. Especially when you see all the purity culture stuff about men wanting good wifey type girls isnt exactly true
I love your channel!! Just one question: How do I change myself without the goal being to please men? I'm 18 and overweight for my age and height (220 lbs), and I do want to change to be healthier and to love myself more but I subconsciously still feel like I'm doing it in order for men to be attracted to me (that being the main goal). Men don't really look my way and I ALWAYS make the first move, so I'm getting tired of constantly getting involved with men if I don't even love myself yet. I do this as a way to escape my actual issues in life. I feel like nobody has actually been attracted to me, it's just always been a lust thing.
Hey hun! First and foremost, the intention of losing weight should be to maintain your own health. Staying in shape will help lower blood pressure, risk of heart disease and improve mobility and so on. As for wanting to receive male validation, there is nothing inherently wrong with it but never base your self-worth on it. Unfortunately, most men tend to be attracted to women for one thing. Just remember you are so much more than your body and just focus on yourself. Hope this helps💞
21 here and dealing with the same thing. overweight and yeah i just dont wanna keep obssessing over men and such because theyre not interested in me currently 😅
I love this content! Just a quick note, YOU DON'T HAVE TO LOVE OR LIKE ALL WOMEN. In the end we are human, there are honest and dishonest people, good people and bad people, kind and rude people, this applies to men and women. The point is to realize that in many cases the rivalry we create between women is motivated by society and the media, from the movies we watch to the jokes or beliefs in our family, school or community.
👏
oh god the shame surrounding wanting male validation is so real! especially when women judge other women for this despite the fact that subconsciously we all do the same! this vid was rly good and hit home, made me quite emotional and has made me realise how much more unlearning i gotta do :( but its okay, keep doing these vids they help so much!
aw thank you for this honest and sweet comment my lovely. I get you! 💘🥰❤😘
U talking about how u had moments where u wanted validation from men but not liking it ,is so real cuz, I would tell myself how I want men to want me but then I’m like I don’t even like getting attention from men like that unless it’s a genuine friendship with them😭
I totally get you 💗💗💗💗
Literally this
A few days ago I had an “ah ha!” Moment and I realized that I was spending soooo much time and energy thinking about men and how they may perceive me. Since then I’ve been watching your videos every day, and it’s helping me so much on my journey of decentralizing men from my life. I’m already feeling so much more confident and fulfilled. Thank you for creating this safe community :)
Its also so easy to see how much men bash things women like
Love your videos on decentering men and finding ways to validate yourself and your success. I thought I would “grow out of it” in my 30’s, but honestly, I did for a short time but it so easily creeps back in! As that pressure to find a man and settle down, OR if you don’t do that, then you need to be the “rich, hot, successful, single aunty type” - it really escalates even in your 30’s!
So, you’re doing important work and impacting more people that you realise ❤
This is such a valuable comment - thank you so much for sharing your experience with me (I have no doubt many women in their 30's relate)!
Feel free to share your thoughts or experiences anytime on this channel! xxxx
Keep shining! 💖✨
@@alessiasutherberry ❤️
It can be taken a step further and learn to not be drawn to do things for external validation from anyone. It's definitely a challenge but I find the more I train my brain to care less (which has naturally happened as I got older), the less stress I have and the happier I am in my daily life.
The people who are meant to be in your life (and on the same wavelength) are then naturally drawn to you and you to them.
Seriously I was at a LESBIAN night with my masculine presenting, biologically male non binary friend. The amount of lesbians who flirted with them and tried desperately to gain their attention... shows how powerful the validation of the male gaze is!
YES YES YES I love it when womennnnn!!!! I really love ur content and happy ur talking about this but can I make a small suggestion to move the small plant in front of u? It’s just putting a barrier between us and you and it’s distracting me
Thank you so so much for the suggestion.. I totally agree!! :) xxx
I just want to say you are fantastic ! Keep going on this topic because you really help me and I’m sure a lot of us ! Don’t think that your content is « boring » cause you talk about the same thing cause you actually the first youtube creator that talk about feminism in that perspective : the men validation which is really taboo because all lot of women feel ashamed of. Indeed, I understood that I was touch by acting or looking a certain way to attract men because deep inside I was always taught that beauty only has value if a man looks at it. I discover that I was wrong thanks to my religion Islam which greatly honors women, ( even if the media wants you to believe otherwise) and also by discovering the concep of men validation. But no other youtube video talked as deeply about it as you do on your video. So please keep going you are doing an amazing job and I invite you today to compliment a woman on her work if she does it well. Love from france ❤️
I love how u put the affirmation on the leaf and how the leaf looks like a heart💗 that’s so cute
Aw thanks for noticing lovely!! 🥰🥰🥰💘💘💘💘 xxxxx
Thank you so much for this video! It warms my heart to see women building each other up and supporting one another. Your channel is great! You are great!
Aw hey lovely! thank you for commenting such supportive kind words! You've made my morning! 💘🥰❤🤗☺🩵
i am so glad i found your channel, you make me feel so seen
Hey lovely! This comment has made my day! ❤❤❤Please do share your mums feedback with me - I'd love to know what she thought and felt ! Sending you so much love xx💘💘💘
Keep making those videos! They help me so much❤️
Aw thanks for saying that!💕💗
I love your videos. I believe they can make us woman happier and more free
Thank you for sharing your kind words lovely. Lots of love xxxx 🥰💘❤
I love your videos because are so calm and it’s like a talk to a great friend. Thank you ❤ greetings from Mexico 🇲🇽✨💗💗💗
Aw thank you so much for this message ❤️💖 sending lots of love over to Mexico !😘😘 xoxox
Grateful to you mam first time I saw your video i thought like you are the kind of woman I was trying to find to stay in company with and I was going through a very hard time and i found your video
Aw I am so grateful for your comment lovely. I am so glad you found my channel! Sending you the biggest cuddle! 💕💗💖😘
Omg Lessie I LOVE THIS! 👏🏼 ♥️ So so true and eye opening! Really resonated with the music thing! 😲 And JADORE the writing your own version of success exercise and the journal prompts 🥰 I am doing the journaling now 💌👏🏼 Your video came at the perfect time for me 🥹Wise words as always beautiful girl!!!!!♥️✨👏🏼
This comment has made me the happiest girly! I hope you enjoyed the journal prompts! 💘🥰 xxxxx
thank you so so much for all of your videos! I totally see myself in the things you're talking about and even though I'm very aware of my behavior, I often catch myself seeking male validation. Never believed in this "new year new me" stuff but leaving this internalized behavior behind kinda became one of my goals for 2024. And hearing your videos already helped me to collect my own thoughts and to make first steps in the direction I want to go!
my goodness, that was an unexpectedly wonderful and uplifting video today.❤
3:30 I changed my whole style and attempted to change my personality all for this boy I was in love with to like me. Spoiler alert. He never did.
LOVELY VIDEO! Thank you Alessia💗
Thank you Jenna! Lots of love xx💘🥰
I hope this video makes me feel bad. I have this so bad if a man doesn't like me then I am unworthy
Love this content, not many people talk about this. Thank u girl 💞
It’s that we as women are supposed to want men and their attention is what makes me feel indifferent.
love your vids keep it up
Thank you lovely!!!!! 💖😘🥰🧡✨ xo
thank you so much for this video!! i would love to see you have your own podcast!
oooooo this is something I'd love too!💘💘💘💘
you really have the real beauty❤😍😍😍
I quit doing that 10 years ag0
I have always lived like i have an invisible husband watching my every decision and move... not fun. Especially when you see all the purity culture stuff about men wanting good wifey type girls isnt exactly true
I love ur videos❤
I love your channel!! Just one question: How do I change myself without the goal being to please men?
I'm 18 and overweight for my age and height (220 lbs), and I do want to change to be healthier and to love myself more but I subconsciously still feel like I'm doing it in order for men to be attracted to me (that being the main goal). Men don't really look my way and I ALWAYS make the first move, so I'm getting tired of constantly getting involved with men if I don't even love myself yet. I do this as a way to escape my actual issues in life. I feel like nobody has actually been attracted to me, it's just always been a lust thing.
Hey hun! First and foremost, the intention of losing weight should be to maintain your own health. Staying in shape will help lower blood pressure, risk of heart disease and improve mobility and so on. As for wanting to receive male validation, there is nothing inherently wrong with it but never base your self-worth on it. Unfortunately, most men tend to be attracted to women for one thing. Just remember you are so much more than your body and just focus on yourself. Hope this helps💞
21 here and dealing with the same thing. overweight and yeah i just dont wanna keep obssessing over men and such because theyre not interested in me currently 😅
❤
👏👏👏💕💕💕💕
🥰🥰🥰🥰
I looooove u thanks boo, 🥹🩵
Awww lots of love lovely!!🥰💖😘❤️
Thank you for this🩷
💘💘💘💘💘 lots of love xxxx