[1M Subs] Drawing My Childhood

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  • Опубліковано 29 бер 2023
  • Sorry for the weird personal video. It's been a weird road. Thank you all for getting this channel to where it is today. Lots more new art educational content is on the way!
    ! Upcoming 2023 Brainstorm class links !
    Stylized Portraiture: www.brainstormschool.com/sp1
    All painting in this video was done in Corel Painter. Brushes publicly hosted for free on my Patreon page.
    !! the usual links !!
    Now streaming regularly on twitch: / sinixdesign
    Instagram is @sinixdesign
    Twitter: / sinix777
    Visit my patreon at: / sinix
    Chill out with my Spotify playlist: open.spotify.com/playlist/17t...
    !! Songs Used in Video !!
    HOME - We're Finally Landing
    Emmit Fenn - Alone
    Dissappointment by Kevin MacLeod is licensed under a Creative Commons Attribution 4.0 license. creativecommons.org/licenses/...
    Somber by Audionautix is licensed under a Creative Commons Attribution 4.0 license. creativecommons.org/licenses/...
    #artist #storytime #drawmylife

КОМЕНТАРІ • 327

  • @samdoesarts
    @samdoesarts Рік тому +681

    So well deserved, happy for u

    • @quammi_the_cat
      @quammi_the_cat Рік тому +2

      this video was posted 15hrs ago why was ur comment 17hrs ago👀

    • @quammi_the_cat
      @quammi_the_cat Рік тому +1

      actually sorry I think my page didn't load properly whoops

    • @cristhian_bermuller
      @cristhian_bermuller Рік тому +1

      @@quammi_the_cat hahaha, I had a time machine

    • @love2draw565
      @love2draw565 10 місяців тому

      Sam is this your favorite artist

  • @Sycra
    @Sycra Рік тому +272

    Thanks for being open and vulnerable! It's always eye opening to see where people come from, and I feel like your story just adds so much more interest to what I already knew about you (great artist and teacher). Congrats dude!

  • @marsfeathers
    @marsfeathers Рік тому +258

    Honestly this video brought me close to tears, it's so relatable to some of my experiences. That burning violence inside, the simmering, the frustration, the autism. And near the end when you talk about wanting to swallow the whole universe???? I've never understood anything so deeply in my life!! I felt it rattle in my bones. When I looked at the clear night sky on my farm as a kid I wanted to spread my arms and gather up all stars and inky black and stuff them inside. You want to consume the world and just *know* it

    • @bruhifysson9005
      @bruhifysson9005 Рік тому +6

      Im not crying, you are

    • @marsfeathers
      @marsfeathers Рік тому +4

      @@bruhifysson9005 grips your shoulder in quiet commiseration. I feel ya man

  • @greablood1072
    @greablood1072 Рік тому +150

    It’s so weird to just now hear your backstory, after watching your videos for 9 years. I’m also redoing my adolescence! It’s tough

    • @shadowfox9490
      @shadowfox9490 Рік тому +3

      Yo! Me too! We get to rebuild our adolescene the way we want it to be.

  • @bananabread427
    @bananabread427 Рік тому +283

    CONGRATS FOR 1 MILLION ! you definitely played a major role in our art journey and deserve every single subscriber

  • @KaterynaM_UA
    @KaterynaM_UA Рік тому +61

    wow, it was not at all what I've expected from this video. I'm so happy that you've managed to turn your life around, I'll be honest, I don't know any other success story like this. Truly inspiring, I hope anyone who needs comfort can find it through this story.

  • @clara1291
    @clara1291 Рік тому +16

    I like the idea of "redoing my adolescence"! My chronic illness really set me back and I often feel overwhelmed at the things I can't do anymore, but framing it as a do-over feels... more forgiving, somehow

  • @smashingpencils
    @smashingpencils Рік тому +51

    Wow that got dark fast. That sounds like it was hell. It’s strange, it was like you were talking about my life. Virtually identical. Super timid and shy, then awkward then outcasted then angry then giving up then restarting (by doing art too. After dropping out of engineering). Would’ve been cool to have met someone in the same boat along the way.

  • @Bagplants
    @Bagplants Рік тому +90

    "All i could feel was hate inside" I think that's the start of many artist's journey lol. crazy to see what change you've been through Sinix - the little sprout has a lot more meaning now :)

  • @yeterartkk
    @yeterartkk Рік тому +34

    Your hair is extra fabulous and fluffy

    • @__-vb3ht
      @__-vb3ht Рік тому +7

      His hair looks just like he always draws hair on people

  • @AlvinSuckt
    @AlvinSuckt Рік тому +41

    You quite literally changed my whole perception of art. I wouldn´t be the same person if it weren´t for you. So - much love, and congrats for 1 Million subs!

  • @questis223
    @questis223 Рік тому +7

    You know I’m just realizing I think we had very similar lives. Especially the fear of everything all the time, and the anger. Thank you for sharing, I kind of thought I was alone with all of this

  • @drummerxkun
    @drummerxkun Рік тому +16

    been following you since i was a kid. i'm 24 now so thats gotta be over 10 years. Youre one of the few channels from back then that i still follow closely, watch, comment and rewatch again and again. youre one of my fav artists/ art teachers, big congrats on 1M! Your work and perspective is always so thoughtful and to hear a little about the journey that made you, you, makes me appreciate even more the amazing work you've done. I relate slightly to your experience, being neurodivergent, angry at the world, seeking interaction and control online. Art has been an outlet for my teen rage and also a means of catharsis and rehabilitation for me. It really is very inspiring and heartening to hear how you overcome the anger and toxicity. I wonder if one day you'll speak more on how you managed to work through it, i know there are a lot of kids who are really struggling who could use the advice

  • @marsfeathers
    @marsfeathers Рік тому +3

    I love your little hair sprout it's so so cute

  • @Crasteeh
    @Crasteeh Рік тому +25

    I think it's fascinating how your one of a kind art style represents your life in a way. it's an exentension of you and it has a soul that even AI can only dream of having. The imperfections, the Unordinary, and the Mature essence can be seen within your life but also felt within your works of art. How an outcast became one of the internet's art gods. Keep doing what makes you happy. You've inspired me, and many many others.

  • @tarashort7256
    @tarashort7256 9 місяців тому +2

    As your sister, I didn't know about some of the things you mentioned but I am impressed at how insightful this was. Congrats on your accomplishments! I am proud of you.

  • @DJake1992
    @DJake1992 Рік тому +3

    wow... did not expect that kind of story

  • @chimaerakid
    @chimaerakid Рік тому +5

    Wow. I genuinely thank you so so much for making this. As a late diagnosed autistic, I always felt to lost, scared, yet angry about everything. Thank you so much for opening up and speaking about this! You have been one of my favorite art youtubers for so many years now, and hearing your story has made me feel a lot more hopeful about my future. You absolutely deserve the 1M subscribers, congratulations!!!

  • @arachnidsLor
    @arachnidsLor Рік тому +4

    ive been watching this channel for about exactly a decade by now. which is kinda crazy to me! the amount of impact you left on not only my art but also on a lot of mindset things related to art for me, its certainlty a lot. and im sure im not the only one here. im glad you found your own corner of the world and your own place. you add so much to this world, so many people became artists or found inspiration because of you, at least partially. a lot of your experiences are very very relatable for not only me but many others (autism/adhd.) the feeling of quitting things and drawing lines even if its bad, because it gives you a sense of control, you put that into words so well, i never heard someone else talk about it like that. thank you for all your hard work, i hope good things will come your way still. i will keep watching!

  • @ectoskeletal
    @ectoskeletal Рік тому +6

    i just want to say thank you. this takes a lot of vulnerability to share. there was a point in my own turmoil where i felt defeated at the fact that there was no "success story". everyone i looked up to and could relate to on a personal level had burned out quickly and miserably. i really admire both your technical and teaching skill and personality so knowing that it's the result of struggle and self-improvement is really a breath of fresh air. this gives me a lot of hope for my future

  • @niezziq4223
    @niezziq4223 Рік тому +2

    God I really needed to hear that last part mentioning vulnerability, watched this video at a perfect time.
    What a life, glad you're in a good place now. Looking forward to seeing more of your fantastic videos, Sinix, cheers!

  • @ron.1738
    @ron.1738 Рік тому +11

    if it weren't for you or other people such as sycra and ahmed aldoori I wouldn't be the artist I am today. I am still drawing with shadows the way you taught me and it's because of you that I mainly sketch with pens, thank you

  • @israelnene01
    @israelnene01 11 місяців тому +1

    Sinix you are a legend, I am very grateful for everything you have done here on UA-cam during all these years you have been a huge inspiration for me. Much love

  • @lilacui1222
    @lilacui1222 Рік тому +2

    Thank you for this Sinix. Im also trying to redo my adolescence, it really eats at me how I wasted everything just because of laziness, lack of self-esteem, being so goddamn timid, and how I let what others say about me dictate who I am. Now that I am trying to learn everything as I step into adulthood, though I lose hope sometimes because of how left behind I am, hearing about your past inspires me to keep moving forward. Thank you again!

  • @wevidahwabbit
    @wevidahwabbit Рік тому

    Sinixxxx so happy that ur lil sprout came back to life after all that QwQ Balled my eyes out when it withered in your hands...

  • @ursusludens7174
    @ursusludens7174 Рік тому +4

    That's fucked up, i'm really happy that you're better now. You are one the most skilled artists i know

  • @Lime-gs7hu
    @Lime-gs7hu Рік тому +4

    this video came as a total surprise to me. you are such a big inspiration in my art journey and it will always be that way! Congrats for one million subscribers, as someone who watched your videos for countless years, im really happy to see you hitting this big goal. Keep it up :)

  • @s4oren2
    @s4oren2 Рік тому +2

    if there's anyone who deserves 1M it's you!! You are basically the reason I paint today. It took so long but IM SO GLAD

  • @marfrinix_
    @marfrinix_ Рік тому +9

    So happy for you, Sinix! May I just say that your learning/teaching videos have helped me a lot to improve and I am eternally grateful!

  • @ezz625
    @ezz625 Рік тому +3

    I relate so much with this story.
    It’s so easy to hate yourself for your inadequacies, and by extension the world, but how I see it; this life and time so so incredibly complex, that it’s actually a wonder that anyone know what to do. You shouldn’t blame yourself for not ‘being normal’ or whatever, just be thankful for the gift that is the time you’ve been given.
    Just try and make the best of it, even though it might be horrible at times, I’m my experience the good moments make it worth it.
    Thank you for sharing, this is probably my favorite sinix video to date; you’re not only helping your audience with doing art, but also with doing life. Very inspirational!

  • @maxmustermann-fo5fp
    @maxmustermann-fo5fp 10 місяців тому +1

    I lost your channel during a turbulent time of my life. Just found it again with this video and I was so happy I cried. Am going to rewatch all your videos over and over and over again, as i used to do.

  • @lucasolsson9479
    @lucasolsson9479 7 місяців тому

    I was hooked all the way through. Great storytelling and I also love the way you did this short animation, and also for being so open about your personal struggle. I had a rough time when I was younger, and I agree that being vulnerable is a key to progress as well as stepping out of your comfort zone.
    I was also struck by the feeling of how happy (and motivated) your videos make me. Thank you, much love!

  • @lornakelleherart
    @lornakelleherart Рік тому +1

    I was very emotional watching this entire video. Thank you for being so open about your life journey. As someone who has always tiptoed life around self-sabotage, I can definitely relate to a lot of the feelings you talked about. It wasn't until I had kids and rekindled my love of art again that I felt something was finally worth the effort. Rebuilding your life is always one of the greatest achievements, so I honestly couldn't be happier for you.

  • @barbararebocho6729
    @barbararebocho6729 8 місяців тому

    Dude my teenage years were so similar to this. The existential Crisis and the way at some point things for better and I wanted and loved the universe. It gets better.

  • @cextheartist
    @cextheartist Рік тому

    you are a beautiful human being and a lot of those 1M of ppl loves what you do for us, your efforts, your bad but still funny jokes, hahaha We love you! Congrats my man.

  • @soopyfly
    @soopyfly Рік тому +2

    Congratulations and thank you for sharing your journey! There were definitely some parts I felt immensely heard while in others I was hearing you describe something very new. I especially resonated with the burning existential dread that comes with being raised Catholic, the feelings of worthlessness and laziness, and getting sucked into the toxic parts of the internet to find somewhere to belong. I have never experienced a struggle with mental health to that degree, but your story has given me a new understanding of others around me who I felt I could never get close to. Again, thank you for this deeply personal video and all the guidance you've given us in art.

  • @hoaheoua
    @hoaheoua Рік тому +2

    Wow, I’m so surprised that it was so long considering how much you have put out for us. I’m so fucking happy to be here, to have stuck with you for 6 years - ever since I was such a kid with just the dream of painting. You changed my life and my feelings with art, and you still do. Congrats, Sinix, I’m so so happy and proud of you and of our community

  • @TeethCollect
    @TeethCollect Рік тому +2

    Thank you for being willing to talk about your past so personally. I think I get caught up in believing all my inspirations were always amazing, it helps to know someone can be so amazing despite going through some harsher things

  • @DontRollInitiative
    @DontRollInitiative Рік тому

    Thanks for sharing your journey.
    And thanks for arriving at the point where you are right now:).

  • @Tea_with_fonts
    @Tea_with_fonts Рік тому +4

    He deserves so much recognition omg

  • @maaxrenn
    @maaxrenn Рік тому

    WOWZERZ ive been subbed for like 12yrs CRAZY since the painting faces video

  • @Cr4b.
    @Cr4b. Рік тому +1

    Glad-ish i’m not the only one feeling the toes

  • @danielquebedeaux1835
    @danielquebedeaux1835 9 місяців тому

    Glad you are in a better place. Thanks so much for sharing and for all the great content.

  • @nelevonid
    @nelevonid Рік тому +1

    Every person have uniqe story behind, but yours... i'm so glad that u found way out of it, so now i can watch ur videos

  • @r7mangm313
    @r7mangm313 Рік тому

    Congrats! We defiantly feel closer to you in a way now:) Thanks

  • @sookieli5915
    @sookieli5915 Рік тому

    Rocky but beautiful journey! Our world seem to be with endless mixed feelings, sometimes there is no reason for what made us or mede us feel. You are an overcomer, and that is beautiful!

  • @stratovolcano7813
    @stratovolcano7813 Рік тому +3

    Congrats for 1M!!!! This was… painfully relatable. Some of the specifics were different but the story beats were almost identical. You’re such a kind and thoughtful person, I’m proud of who you are today. Here’s to growth!

  • @skzanarchist
    @skzanarchist Рік тому +1

    i can't explain how elevated i am to know you finally achieved 1 million subs! i've learned whatever little i can draw and started my art journey by watching your anatomy videos and they have truly taught me great lessons! i'm so happy for your future endeavours sinix🖤

  • @bluebell560
    @bluebell560 Рік тому +2

    CONGRATS FOR 1 MIL SINIX!! 🥳🎉
    You’ve definitely deserved it for a long time.

  • @derkater5489
    @derkater5489 Рік тому +3

    Thank you Sinix, you motivated me to become an artist and you will always have a special place in my heart

  • @flowerfields6306
    @flowerfields6306 Рік тому

    Thank u for making this video, and congrats on 1 mil!! You have always seemed like a really down to earth, authentic person and im really glad I get to watch and admire the art and videos u make :)

  • @mouseich9576
    @mouseich9576 Рік тому

    Congratulation on 1 Mil sub! This video was so entertaining to watch. I'm glad you made this, I resonated with so much of the video towards the end. Thanks Sinix for being on UA-cam!

  • @VRb553
    @VRb553 Рік тому

    Congrats on 1 million!! Thank you for all the videos over the years.

  • @cereal2373
    @cereal2373 Рік тому +2

    This was really beautiful. I love your channel! You a hundred percent deserve all the viewers, fans, support this channel received. Thank you for giving us such amazing content~

  • @TheRjesc
    @TheRjesc Рік тому

    this was a nice video, i totally agree with what you've said about vulnerability, it's a hard thing to give others but it is so worth it!
    congrats on 1 million subs! your videos have played a big part on my personal art journey, so thank you for deciding to share your knowledge for everyone to see
    you have been a wonderful figure in the art community Sinix, and thank you for everything that you do, i can only wish you the best in everything you tackle 💛

  • @madeleinegray3106
    @madeleinegray3106 Рік тому +1

    Congratulations on the 1M! So well deserved. Thank you for all your art help and your vulnerability in this video. u rock

  • @honeycream1396
    @honeycream1396 Рік тому +1

    CONGRATS ON ONE MILLION!! love your videos :)

  • @hacojade
    @hacojade Рік тому

    Congratulations Sinix!, you are one of my biggest inspirations to continue in art, you totally deserve the one million for helping and giving high quality tips ❤🎉 (also because you are a really nice person)

  • @angelochristofero9975
    @angelochristofero9975 Рік тому

    I cant explain how much influence you had (and still has) in my art journey and how i think avout art in general, congrats!!

  • @wishi960
    @wishi960 Рік тому

    Thank you for this video and all the other amazing videos over the years. The sketchbook videos really got me into art at highschool and the tutorials are still helping me today. Keep up the great work.

  • @aechviews
    @aechviews Рік тому +1

    congrats on the big million, sinix ! you're easily one of my favourite art people. thank you for all that you've given and will continue to give to the art community ❤

  • @didgineil
    @didgineil Рік тому

    Beautifully real. Thank you ❤

  • @IsachenkoIA
    @IsachenkoIA Рік тому +1

    Thanks for being honest and brave and for your teachings too! Congrats!

  • @username2168
    @username2168 Рік тому

    I think this is one of my favorites video of all youtube

  • @elanifrantz3227
    @elanifrantz3227 Рік тому +1

    You're incredible!!! Thank you for sharing your story ❤

  • @joaovitora.pelegrini2000
    @joaovitora.pelegrini2000 Рік тому

    You always inspired me as an arts and know you inspired me in my personal growth journey. I'm so happy you were able to turn things around. Congrats and thanks

  • @roberttweaker9625
    @roberttweaker9625 Рік тому +1

    Thank you for sharing a vulnerable story. There's nothing more I appreciate from art.

  • @mitroli8668
    @mitroli8668 Рік тому

    Congratulations on 1 million, well deserved! The video brought me to tears, thank you for making this, and for continuing to put out more content. Always makes me happy to see a new notification from you 😊

  • @pbguy1266
    @pbguy1266 Рік тому +1

    I've only recently started watching your content but I found your story very touching and relatable. As a fellow 90's kid who grew up on the internet it's wild to see how much overlap we had in online habits. It was a bizarre way to become acquainted with the world, but in hindsight it seemed like those places were a natural confluence for those of us who felt out of place in the real world. Thanks for sharing.

  • @suzume_artz
    @suzume_artz Рік тому

    Congrats on 1M Subs, Sinix! You’re one of the literal god-sent artists I’ve seen on UA-cam. I learnt a lot from you, especially from your Anatomy Quick Tips & Paint Over Pals videos. Thank you for helping me with my art journey, as well as for talking about your life journey in this video. Wishing you the best for the future as well ❤

  • @puny338
    @puny338 Рік тому

    Congrats on reaching 1 million! The amount of things I can relate to about your story is a ton. I struggled with negativity constantly and surrounded myself with it when I was sad, fortunately I've since grown past that but sometimes it can come around but it's mostly a quick fluctuation of emotions.

  • @reltcstone2
    @reltcstone2 9 місяців тому

    I appreciate the video robert! I enjoyed hearing the childhood backstory. Its rad seeing all that you've accomplished. and congrats on the subscriber count! Its super awesome. It was a pleasure having you as a teacher.

  • @MlNH0
    @MlNH0 Рік тому

    congratulations!! You've helped me grow so much, and I enjoy your videos even without stressing about learning anything new. You inspire me alot. Thanks for being with us :)

  • @cringeneer5490
    @cringeneer5490 8 місяців тому

    Congrats on 1M! Also your story was definitely touching and something I didn't expect. I'm glad you're in a better place now. Keep up the good work!

  • @briannacooper2628
    @briannacooper2628 Рік тому

    Congratulations and thank you! I appreciate the skill you share with us and your openness about your path. I love how you include change and choice as part of the tougher times.

  • @azon9709
    @azon9709 Рік тому +2

    always great to see you upload!!! congrats!!!

  • @nevaeh3660
    @nevaeh3660 Рік тому

    DESERVEDD!!! You literally TAUGHT me how to draw. Since I’ve started watching you over the years, I got into Art School. I always credit my work to you Sinix ❤ Love you with all my heart

  • @crazyneonate8626
    @crazyneonate8626 Рік тому

    Congratz man!! you deserve it so much, youre one of the OG AND still one of the best artist on YT in my opinion. Huge influence on my own journey too!

  • @tekaneo
    @tekaneo Рік тому

    Wow! Thank you for sharing and congratulations on your great achievement of life!

  • @theunknowndoodler
    @theunknowndoodler Рік тому

    I didn’t think this video would answer some questions for me I didn’t know I needed to be answered. I’m so glad you put it out here and congrats on one million subscribers!

  • @serajstyle
    @serajstyle Рік тому

    Thank you Sinix, all what i have to say is that your rough childhood gave us a lot THANK YOU SO MUCH. I follow a lot of artist but i learnd from you the most i even thank you for your dry brush for procreate that helped me in painting and finding my art style and improving since you put it online after years of suffering at drawing and painting you helped me so much, thanks and have a nice and healthy life. Always waiting your new videos i subscribed long time ago😅

  • @JosephWorkman1984
    @JosephWorkman1984 Рік тому

    Beautiful video man! Thanks for sharing parts of your story.

  • @takoonye7274
    @takoonye7274 Рік тому

    Thank you for being so honest about your life and inspiring others to consider that there is hope left :). Also CONGRATS!!

  • @Sivart.
    @Sivart. 11 місяців тому

    Thanks for telling your story, love what you do , always inspiring

  • @mangeybum1443
    @mangeybum1443 Рік тому

    this is a powerful piece of work. I applaud your vulnerability. Thanks for sharing. You're an inspiration and I am glad you came out of the reactionary rabbit hole

  • @DingDong-bw7mq
    @DingDong-bw7mq Рік тому

    That little toe thing... and so much more. Great movie dude

  • @user-ck9ks4us9w
    @user-ck9ks4us9w Рік тому +1

    Nice knowing more about you! It's not so long that I'm following you but I have always enjoyed your videos!

  • @perhaps4887
    @perhaps4887 Рік тому +2

    CONGRATS! You were the first youtuber whose style aligned with my own and I have infinite thanks to give you for teaching me how to paint!! You deserve 1 mill man, good job.

  • @lindaguerraxoxo
    @lindaguerraxoxo 11 місяців тому

    So relatable. I love your videos. I recently discovered you and I find you to be a breath of fresh air in the cluttered world of sometimes toxic art videos.

  • @epepnator6029
    @epepnator6029 Рік тому

    Congrats!! loved this video, thank you for sharing you‘re experience!

  • @danieneit6830
    @danieneit6830 Рік тому

    Congratulations on 1 million subscribers! I have long considered you one of my primary art parents, and I find your story inspiring. Vulnerability is difficult, but worth it. Thank you for sharing ❤

  • @MistereXMachina
    @MistereXMachina Рік тому

    I've been watching you since I was around 15, I think. It's very strange to see how far you've come, how far we've come.

  • @faustmugen
    @faustmugen Рік тому

    This character arc is insanely well put. Learnt so very much from you and your videos Sinix, thanks for the content!

  • @kateprescesky3060
    @kateprescesky3060 Рік тому

    This was so great, thank you for sharing your story and congrats!

  • @wheeliebot8654
    @wheeliebot8654 Рік тому +1

    i dont know what i was expecting but this was beautiful, super glad u make content and ur art will always be a big inspirtation !!!

  • @nengelen
    @nengelen Рік тому

    In lieu of a story about how relatable it was for me or how you shaped me as a person, just a big congrats for the channel, props for the surplus of artistic skill and thanks for all the tips, effort & videos 👌 best of luck

  • @katiemiller7428
    @katiemiller7428 Рік тому

    Wow, thank you for this gift! I am so proud of you and your brave and creative act of transforming destructive mindsets and bad endings into love, humility, and new beginnings. Thank you for sharing and all the best!

  • @kassenfox4051
    @kassenfox4051 Рік тому

    Congrats! Been watching for a while cuz i was board and feeling learn-y + i like art lol. Been trying to learn more anatomy and shading recently and youve been a great help!

  • @lil_o_O_
    @lil_o_O_ Рік тому

    Thank you, Sinix!

  • @schiz9demenace
    @schiz9demenace Рік тому +1

    I remember trying to learn to draw. I would watch you and Sycra. Good to see you popping that 1m!