Why you SHOULDN'T Date the French! Personality Types That Should Beware of French Dating!
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- Опубліковано 13 чер 2024
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Salut everyone! Happy month of February sprinkled with a bit of French love and French romance! You may not celebrate Valentine’s Day as an actual holiday, but it’s here this month and it is the perfect opportunity to do some videos on French Dating, The Dating Culture, Relationships in France, All the good things to know when you are a foreigner dating in France and you get hooked up with a French man or French woman.
A lot of people focus on all the reasons why you should date a Frenchman or French woman. Mainly because the French have the reputation or the stereotype of being romantic and so there is so much content around how to date in France because who doesn’t want a romantic other half? BUT, the French aren’t for everyone so this video focuses on all the personalities that wouldn’t necessarily mesh well with the French. So check it out and let me know what you think in the comments below!
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Check out some of my other culture shock videos!
USA Culture Shocks: • USA CULTURE SHOCKS | W...
The French Do It Better: • REVERSE CULTURE SHOCKS...
French Culture Shocks: • FRENCH CULTURE SHOCKS ...
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Salut Everyone! Is the month of love, so a perfect opportunity to dive into a subject that is quite popular on the channel: LOVE IN FRANCE! I took a different twist on this video though because I usually tell everyone they should marry a frenchman like me! haha and I wanted to share some of the drawbacks and people who might not enjoy it as much as i do! Let me know what you guys think though, because it's obviously a lot of generalizations! Sending you lots of love and bisous!
To be perfectly honest with you, I always found the French romantic stereotype completely ridiculous and way overhyped upon. In France, we apply that stereotype to the Italians...
I am not even French, but those Italians are built different 😍😍😍😍😍😍😍
We just exorcise everyone. I bet the Italians do the same for the French.
This video was hilarious. I'm American but my father was French and everything phrased as a warning in this video sounded like a relief to me. Love the French way!
Married to a Frenchman and these are all so incredibly accurate. Lol.
Same girl, same. Glad you can relate!
Great video Kate! I'm French and my partner is French too and let's see if we check all your boxes: when we met, we saw each other a few times and became exclusive and boyfriend/girlfriend quite immediately, so check! We've been together 11 years but we're not married and we don't plan on having kids, another check (but we are in a civil union though). Very often when I buy new clothes, my partner says "this is new, isn't it? I don't like it!", again check! Valentine's Day is round the corner and we're BOTH too lazy to celebrate it this year, double check! Neither of us is very keen on celebrating birthdays with huge parties or even doing big fuss over Christmas, we prefer small intimate dinners, another double check! And since we're both teachers (I teach English and he teaches Maths), we both LOOOOOOVE to debate and expose arguments for hours over any kind of topic (we actually did it this afternoon)! I guess your video is 100% accurate, well done Kate!
Love the acting on the sensitive part ! lol 'no, it looks bad'. I think that it happened to me already. A woman was asking me about her new haircut and i think that i just said that i didn' t like it.. But, if she did, good for her. I mean, it ' s not on MY head and she should do what she wants, not caring about everyone' s opinion on it. So, to me, it was more of a 'good on you girl, you do you, doesn' t matter if i like it or not' but she was probably sad about it.
Great! I would’ve crossed myself off the list but like the honesty and intensity factors. Bis happy Valentine’s
Ta perception des choses me fais rire 😂, tu n'as pas tord sur certains points !
I laughed about the part about debating! I learned that from my Parisian cousins, they always want to debate American politics when I visit. It took me years to get used to it. In the U.S., we don't discuss politics because it always ends in an argument! I know now that we can debate - and even disagree - very amicably.
Oh god, I really am French. As a Canadian with big French roots, been finding this channel interesting. But THIS video... my husband could have written this script 😆 🤣 I feel so seen.
Honestly, the whole "being exclusive" talk between adults will sound childish to people in most european countries (if not all of them). A discussion that will clarify whether the two see a relationship with the same gravity is understanable at a point, but going out with many people at the same time and conside this is natural until declaring an "exclusivity"? No, this is immature, and a convenient for those who like to cheat or lead on somebody.
I agree 100%
comme les américain 😂😂😂
How interesting, people don’t date multiple people at the same time?
@@lijohnyoutube101 Those who do past adolescence or early adulthood are perceived as rather immature at the best and serial cheaters at the worst. Unless we are talking about consenting adults who are all aware about what happens.
The American dating scene is shifting with this…it’s insane how everyone was physical with multiple people and called that “dating.” It’s starting to change…we are still “dating” multiple people but not being physical at all until u can reach a logical decision about whether that person is good for u or not without getting swept away into a problem. This is important especially financially here because everything is so expensive and most issues arise are over money (either their is not enough or maybe a partner will shame u or try to control u…and it’s hard to escape here on your own…you’re life can be ruined for years or even the whole way through because of finances)
This is very enlightening. I'm Asian ( Filipino) although no stranger to meeting European men , this French guy I've met online is about to come over to my country to stay for 2 weeks, and these videos make anticipations about French culture and habits less anxiety inducing 😊 im generally comfortable with most of it surprisingly. So I'm glad haha. 😊
Kamusta teh? Mygad!!!!
This video it's pretty accurate. I don't like to debate as much most french people. But my American fiance did notice that "I love to argue". I explained to him the culture but it's sometimes hard to be on the same page. Hoping to take a trip to France in a couple of years.
That's very helpful and realistic tips to help viewers figure out if a French person is right for them. One or two points you made were one's I could see possible struggle to adjust but the rest were small enough to me to perhaps not have trouble and have very minimal adjusting to 🤔If only there was a video just like this for every country in the world 😩But especially Europe since that's my aim ☺ Great video & warm regards
So pretty much all of this sounds perfect to me ❤
Really like the video.
Thanks Noah!
French - especially younger ones - are very keen of "Pacs". Here is a Wikipedia definition: In France, a civil solidarity pact, commonly known as a PACS, is a contractual form of civil union between two adults for organising their joint life. It brings rights and responsibilities, but less so than marriage. This usually happens when a kid is coming, or before buying a property. In North America, we could learn a bit from that...
Ils sont PACSÉS maintenant ... Oubliez le grand élégant mariage à l'Eglise Catholique du quartier et la fête des nôces.!!!
To be honest, I find "French love" to be extremely performative. A lot of flirtations just to bang and separate. I've found that real commitment is quite hard to find, especially in Paris.
A B S O L U T E L Y!! So what if you are looking for a partner for life? A French Catholic priest?
@lavinder11 "I find "French love" to be extremely performative. A lot of flirtations just to bang and separate":
Frenchman here: I was exactly like you said but when I reached 25 I met my girl (French too) and these quick encounters (in France Germany, etc) stopped suddenly and we just celebrated our 50th wedding anniversary. Plenty of different opinions, plenty of great moments, some sad moments, not even one kiss outside of marriage. I am not a priest and I worked a cumulated 4 years away from home (China, Canada, UK, USA). Guess what, when you love, you love. Period.
I think that's all of France
@@johnjeanb That's nice to hear. I'm surrounded by scoundrels, unfortunately.
Enjoyed the tips! One question a bit strange but I couldn’t look away! You did just one eyebrow? 👀
Happy Valentine’s !
Thanks you too!
This video was so fun! Thanks for sharing your perspective!
"defend you opinions smoothly" god, if you saw my friends and i "defending our opinions" you would see there is nothing smooth about it ahahah
This video was so entertaining 😂 not that I had a chance anyways, but this definitely tells me that a French guy is not for me at all (romantically).
Votre style d'explication de la culture et des gens français est assez unique et interactif ! Je suis un indien qui apprend le français et après avoir regardé ça, je sens que je serai très à l'aise avec les français !
Wow je sais pas depuis combien de temps tu apprends mais tu écrit vraiment super bien :)
Everything you say is true (but not to the same degree). I had a French boyfriend when I lived there and in the French part of Switzerland. The over-the-top letters (with expressions like you mentioned) from him, before email, really charmed me I have to say. I had never experienced that with guys in the U.S.! Entertaining video!
Merci j'ai tous compris
Let’s feed the algorithm
C'est pas être conflictuel, mais franc et clair !
Wow, the French teach their students to think independently, and critically, and to be able to justify and defend their opinions? Don't let the American 'educational' system know that, they'll spend a month in a crying closet !
I'm sure the French educational establishment has a roadmap as to what constitutes "independent thinking" & "critical thinking".
In western Europe all roads lead to Brussels (& the goals of the organizations headquartered there).....
I experience this with my American husband, he is well educated but is very reticent about debating. I think it has more to do with culture and etiquette. I is not polite to debate in social settings; one speaks of the weather, football or the last grill bought, nothing deep, it's completely the reverse in French culture. As a kid, when I used to start talking about trivial subjects at the table, my father used to say: "Cela n'a pas d'intérêt général" (Not of general interest).
This has nothing to do with education, but culture. American culture tends to be polite - as a whole - and peace keeping.
@@lavinder11 peace keeping? While invading other countries and (drone-)bombing them. ahh the irony.
@@lavinder11 i wish french people would also learn some of the values of peace keeping sometimes.
In my experience the things that have been true per this video are: you better be able to handle the brutal truth, and they never back down from their opinions, EVER! I would add some things like don’t expect to marry and have kids young, and French are not so puritanical when it comes to sex.
Not sure about the new generation as I haven’t lived in France for 10+ years but this applies to me really well and my Argentinian wife would totally agree too
This is quite funny. Literally everything sounds perfect for me, except Nr. 2 which sounds horrible :D
I love youuu ❤️❤️❤️
Ahahah it sums up a good part of my dating life struggles living in anglophone countries as a French man ahah
Bonjour.
Je suis étonné de voir à quel point les relations Homme-Femme que vous décrivez éclairent de façon plus générale nos traits de caractère.
Avez-vous pensé à entreprendre des études d'anthropologie ?
Cordialement.
Pourquoi pas! peut être c'est un bonne idée!
@@UnintentionallyFrenchified votre intérêt pour ma culture flatte mon égo d'indigène.
S'il vous plaît, n'adoptez pas l'écriture inclusive.
Je soumets à votre perspicacité le problème suivant :
Le contexte
Le chambellan, sur un âne, tenait dans sa main un seau dans lequel il avait mis le sceau royal. Le chambellan qui était un sot, fit faire un saut à l'âne.
Question :
Comment écrivez vous :
Les trois "so" tombèrent à terre.
Il semblerait que cette dernière phrase puisse se dire mais pas s'écrire.
Merci pour vos vidéos.
Cordialement.
@@stephanevilboux1706 Bien sûr!! Parce que, autrement, ce seraient les trois seaux? Non, les trois sceaux? Non, les trois sots? NON PLUS!!, à vrai dire, le sot ayant le seau avec le sceau tombèrent à terre.
6:57 It all depends on *why* they broke off a relationship they mistakenly believed to be a love relationship. An ex won't necessarily be accepted in the vicinity. Hate also happen sometimes. It really depends on each person.
C'est normal qu'on ne célébre pas St Patrick, Halloween etc ce ne sont pas des fêtes de notre culture mais des fêtes anglo-saxonnes !
So true ! I admit they (we😳) can be a handful and not always worth the effort.
8:46 Conversely, consider that someone who is very indirect with you doesn't really respect you (unless you're really in pain because of some drama, or unless it's a roleplay for fun): they consider you too fragile or immature to deserve the truth.
Also, *direct and opinionated doesn't mean uncompromising or sure.* If you don't like what you hear directly, of course you can challenge it ! Often, *a challenge to one's opinion is precisely what is expected* , and this is precisely why you are given this opinions so directly. *Building knowledge together is part of friendship* , and you'd better be a friend than an enemy of your lover.
*Rely on non-verbal langage and general purpose* to distinguish from one person who gives you the less biased opinion possible, without armor and defenses, so you can do something even more wonderful with it because this person completely trust you, from the person who is just destroying your enthusiasm out of sadism and is really toxic.
10:46 But the counterpart of this lack of expression compared to tradition-based relations is that *if sincere, your love may survive the fall of traditions.* The world may fall apart, the country may be at war, your birthplace lost, the political regime and religion may change, en registers can burn, all the rituals may evolve because of a pandemic or a revolution... it doesn't necessarily invalidate your love.
If, for whatever reason, you like to hear Adele sing...
Remember: *your love, your responsibility, your artwork* (possibly your masterpiece). Not Walt Disney's or who-knows-who's doing.
I'm indian girl and I have french boyfriend... for him family respects and frds everything matter . And he so caring and husband material haha
Depends on the person. Not everyone in France is like that.
I am French and I am agreeing with you
I am a Mexican girl with a French guy. It took him time to understand how to behave and handle about his "friends" otherwise it's over. Respect is respect everywhere. Understand that, and stop normalising going through bad behaviour just because you have other nationalities. 💅🏻
Yeah the friends with exes is bs excuse for narcissists and attention seekers.Being civil when meeting your exes is one thing but being close friends and expecting me to give them a kiss ?pfff...no f way!
Jaques gettin that pink taco 😂 he's still cheating on you btw
@@lsdiesel8025what ?
@@r.1.336 I bet there's a lot about life you don't understand
Ok, ummm..what I learned here is that I must have more French lineage than I thought 😂 I am a French woman trapped in the Midwest! 😳 Especially about that defending my opinion to the death!
My wife is Asian and we do like to debate for hours! So great! 😁😂
About wedding, yes 1 Disney wedding is for me a childish way to engage with someone.
Traditional marrige no longer exist. The new normal: Meet someone, fall in love, get married, have a kid, get divorced, give half your income to the ex for the rest of your life. This is why marriage as an institution is dying.
It went from dating a French man to a jewelry advertisement lol 😆 😂 🤣 😅 I can't 😆 don't think I'll be watching the rest 😅
Yeah dating a French is not for me 😆
This is the same thing I thought 😆
I don't know which horrifies me more, being expected to carve a place in my life, however small, for an SO's exes, or being expected to maintain contact with my own.
So I can always contact any French girl I’ve talked to? Very cool.
@@AYVYN Why not ?
Sometimes i really feel that i was supposed to born in France, so relatable
i have to said i disagree wth the ex things i am french never let nay of my ex next to me, and if my actual one keep talking to his ex to me its red alert.
Do they cheat a lot or is that a stereotype like the romantic one ?
Bottomline, It's like dating Oscar the Grouch.
7:33 @UnintentionallyFrenchified, you are denying me my nationality. 😳
8:32 Ok, this is true: *a kiss is meaningful.* Don't accept or give a kiss on the mouth lightly. Body language in general is meaningful, not a game.
I'm curious about how french women would respond to me. I've been there once and got a lot of interested looks. Maybe I'll marry a french girl one day. Who knows
I have a french friend
I am the jealous non-confrontational traditional sensitive type 😪
I have heard that dating a Frenchman and having a romantic relationship does not mean at all that this relationship is serious. In fact we, woman, believe that if a man dates us, we immediately present a picture of a wedding and children)😂
Haha completely agree that women tend to project very quickly at the beginning of the relationship compared to men. I guess what i wanted to say is that men tend to jump into relationships quickly in France, but you're right that it doesn't neccessarily mean that it's super serious. But it does mean that it's exclusive. But maybe in a month or two it will fizzle out. So if you're not used to that way of dating, you can feel like you've got a stage 5 clinger at the beginning. :)
@@UnintentionallyFrenchified 100% :)
@@UnintentionallyFrenchified I noticed that too. I know a French man who is in an exclusive relationship. However, he confided to me that it’s just a relationship and he doesn’t see it leads to marriage. It’s a joke, the phrase “we’re exclusive.” It doesn’t mean it is serious.
the French do couple up right away and move in together. the French actually find it strange if you are single. However, keep in mind that they break up fast too. Just because you live together does not mean the frenchie is considering you for long term. and their "honesty' at break up time can be brutal.
The X factor is so weird to me. It’s like a hook up waiting to happen.
Ok pretty accurate.
On sent le vécu 😅
Sadly, I barely agree with anything that was said in this video. :/
Hum.
I feel more stereotypical than ever.
1) don't fancy celebrations
2) am definitely not in monogamous relationships (but neither are my partners 🤣 it might help that I'm only engaging with other guys - not sure it'd be easy were I dating girls)
3) ... BUT I love clarity : I prefer to be straightforward about my lifestyle than lie or promise standards or that version of fidelity that I won't uphold
4) looove debating. (I discussed Judge Kavanaugh's nomination process in a train in Italy where I met two Californians... poor guys ^^')
5) ... I have zero awareness of what damage I do when speaking.
6) and... what was the last point ? traditional you said ?
Yeah you can throw that away 😅
I'm American, and also asexual aromantic, but if I experienced sexual or romantic attraction or if I were looking for a qpr in France, I think it would be a mixed bag for me.
As a ninetieth percentile introvert, I'm not big on huge parties. Also, if I ranked my love languages, I couldn't tell you whether gift giving or acts of service would be at the very bottom, but they are both way down there, so yeah.
In theory I think I would want to take it slow before I became exclusive with somebody, but my understanding is that a qpr doesn't carry the expectation of exclusivity the way that a traditional romantic relationship would. I've never been in a qpr, but I want to.
I'm very conflict avoidant. I can do a little bit of debate as long as emotions don't run too high.
I'm pretty sensitive, but also not very good at picking up on hints. The best way to communicate with me is to be direct without coming across as harsh. If I ask for your opinion of a dress, "Well, I don't personally care for it, but let me show you another dress of yours that I think is more suitable" would be a better response than "God, that looks hideous!"
And I've always felt that tradition was made to serve humankind, not the other way around. If it feels right to you to break tradition, go for it!
I love it! YES, we all have our different passions Poor Kavanaugh! He was an innocent man/victim, whom was put through the ringer, because of extteme partisan politics! I am so glad their efforts didn't work, to lie and destroy him!
Il n’est pas rare effectivement que des gens en couple depuis des années ne se marient pas car l’un les deux mets un point d’honneur à rester libre, ou désapprouve idéologiquement les valeurs du mariage. A écouter: « la non déclaration en mariage » de G. Brassens.
I have a question ; can we say that the opposite is true? That you shouldn't try to date an American if:
- We are not ready to spend money on any commercial celebration?
- we are not ready to create a vacuum around us so that our partner feels at ease?
- one does not procrastinate for years before committing to a romantic relationship?
- we do not consider our partner as a fragile little thing likely to collapse at the slightest annoyance?
- we publicly assume our convictions without feeling obliged to invade the Capitol?
- we don't intend to live in a fairy tale?
Hum... It's not dreaming...
French are far more pragmatic and simple than what is thought 😆. No writen rules, lot of as we feel it at the moment, tomorrow is another day. Et voilà
I'd love to date a french woman... Eva Green would be perfect ❤
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having a close relationship with the ex will not work. I am not marking anything off...I have already been giving hints. Why have an ex and then have a relationship with them Absolutely not. Oh, and I have an opinion about everything and I will definitely defend it.
I'm from Iraq i like frinch caltor and like meet frinch gril dating can you match for my
This scares me
Love lurv lohve
WARNING! Honey, right now you're in Québec, not France. So... here's an advice: NEVER EVER use the word FRENCHY as it is used by the English Canadians the very same way the French call les Maghrébins "ratons": bref, c'est une INSULTE. So, be aware... NEVER EVER use that word, whatever the context: NEVER, period.
C'est marrant, parce que l'on dit toujours des USA que c'est le pays de la Liberté, mais j'ai l'impression que nous avons beaucoup moins de carcan que vous.
Well, halloween is pretty much an american thing....
All this is probably why their divorce rate is so high
I think what you’re saying about Valentines dat etc. Is because these days are not as commercialised in Europe as in the US. I think the French are less materialistic but Sometimes it moves into being stingy.
Stingy in general whether it's with money, gifts, time, and emotions is unattractive. If that's what French women have to deal with, I pity them
What are you basing those statements on? Is it personal experience? Most of your videos (not all, but most) seem to center around tabloid-style entertainment instead of facts and reality.
i wonder how one american women know SO MUCH about the majority of french man ???she must had a prety busy time in france
Bonjour, j'ai l’impression (erronée peut-être) que vous êtes (les américains) encore imprégnés des principes religieux avec les tabous et les interdits. En France, nous sommes des laïques, nous nous sommes libérés du joux religieux en 1905. Deux exemples : pas de bible dans les hôtels, on jure sur l'honneur et pas la bible. C'est une des raisons qui font que nous soyons moins hypocrites, que nous disons ce que nous pensons, que nous acceptons que l'autre ait des idées différentes sans s'interdire d'en parler et de les défendre sans se battre.
Cela me rappelle l'Italie dans les années 60, au cours d'un voyage organisé un ami a embrassé sa fiancée dans la rue et nous avons du aller le rechercher au poste de police, alors que dans les campagnes italienne on trouvait quasiment un couple en action dans chaque meule de foin.
Hello, I have the impression (wrong perhaps) that you (Americans) are still imbued with religious principles with taboos and prohibitions. In France, we are lay people, we freed ourselves from religious jousting in 1905. Two examples: no Bible in hotels, we swear on honor and not the Bible. This is one of the reasons that make us less hypocritical, that we say what we think, that we accept that the other has different ideas without prohibiting ourselves from talking about them and defending them without fighting.
It reminds me of Italy in the 60s, during an organized trip a friend kissed his fiancée in the street and we had to go get him at the police station, while in the Italian countryside there was almost a couple in action in every haystack.
Bravo pour ton travail d'information à destination de tes compatriotes. Merci de comprendre la France et de l'aimer sans la juger.
We still have many religious people, I myself am a Roman Catholic. However, there are less religious than 20 years ago, which is sad to me, because my faith has been a beautiful thing in my life. It saddened me when I was in Paris, France to see such beautiful Cathedrals and Bascillica's not full of the local Faithful! It was primarily only pilgrims and visitors who attended the Holy Sacrifice of the Mass in Paris. I was hoping that when Notre Dame burned, and with the persecution and beheaded Priests in Paris, that this would create a spiritual awakening and that the men and women of Paris would take back their Catholic Churches!
@@jenniferlewisharris7761 Console yourself by telling yourself that nowadays the people who frequent places of worship are true believers unlike the times before when religion was COMPULSORY, forced, hostile to progress, coaxed with royal power to keep under a yoke awful the people.
Yes, this is the wrong assumption. America is hardly religious. in some ways, we're more "progressive" about sex by centering women's pleasure than France.
@@lavinder11 You are not religious????
The slightest US video is filled with MY God, your president swears on the bible, your politicians implore god from morning to night.......
You are confusing religion with sex.
@@christianc9894 No, the US is not religious. Come visit before making conclusions based on constitutional rituals.
I am an American. I find your constant need to market Logado and Ana Luisa deplorable. When you start your commercials I exit your video.
Girlfriends of mine (friends who are girls) believed that French men were sexy and romantic, but when they came to Paris they were totally repulsed by French men. They couldn't believe how short and effeminate all the French guys were -- skinny little men in tight pants and elegant scarves around their necks. I think this is one of the big differences between French women and most other countries. In most countries, women love big strong masculine men. In France, women prefer short skinny guys, even shorter than them.
Salut, please stop referring to French women as Frenchies. It sounds racist.
i am so tired of your video marketing. its making me view your videos as a manipulative way for you to market Lingodo and Ana Luisa. Don"t misunderstand me, you can mention these brands but you go on and on and on ad nuisium.