As much as I love and appreciate your vlogs, please take care of yourself above all else. If your therapist tells you to stop or if you feel like stopping please don’t feel any pressure to keep making videos. ❤️
I stumbled upon this by accident and you vocalised everything that goes on in my head. This was the reality check that I needed that i was not prepared to articulate to myself honestly. Thank you
Hello! I just wanted to say - this summer I've been rewatching your videos to help me move on from exactly what you describe in this vlog - that '80% recovered' stage. It's been so helpful. I find it really ironic that despite the fact I commented 4 years ago in total agreement with you, it's taken me this long to accept that I'm stuck again and to recommit to recovery - FULL recovery! Definitely shows how easy it is to talk the talk without completely walking the walk... even when we genuinely believe we are! So yeah, this video in particular really called me out lol I know that this time will be different - time to break free from the bubble for good. You've been such an inspiration to me over the past 4 or so years. I've been keeping the classic mantras in my head: 'feel shit and do it anyway', 'challenge repeat', 'food doesn't have to be perfect'... and even more so now that I'm challenging myself more actively again. Much love x
Tottaly agree about eating "perfect" food in "perfect" conditions. Sometimes I also can't decide what to eat because I'm afraid I will regret and think "oooh, it would be nicer if I had that stuff instead". And also sometimes I prefer a salad in McDonalds instead of a cheeseburger just because it will take longer to eat. Or eating with chopsticks instead of a fork because it will take longer as well. Noticing what other people eat or buy at the grocery store is what I also experience. I remember times when I restricted a lot and I was like proud of my choices at the grocery store when other people buy cookies, bread etc. How naive I was)
You’re so open and real and that’s what we love about you! I totally get where your coming from and one of my fav quotes is “sometimes you have to go away and be alone for a little while to experience, appreciate and love yourself” ❤️
You do what’s best for you!!!😘😘😘 I was always wondering if some people actually following exactly what they are preaching or they are sharing their knowledge but still not quite there yet and I could tell they aren’t bc they don’t gain weight or get defensive about comments that might be confrontational or jump from place to place in their approaches that they were against of in prior videos... I think it’s important to take some information from recovery vlogs but still keep in prospective that those vloggers aren’t recovered yet and reality might be different I love your videos and you are such a lovely person and it’s so hard to get out of our heads to see what’s real and what’s not...
Totally totally. Personally I only watched videos from recovered people at the moment (which I am not still). It helps me so much to see what I'm aiming for. Everyones different aren't they but that's just my stage right now. I like to see the other side. Tabitha Farrar, Damn the Diets, and follow the intuition are my favourites! x
Megsy Recovery Mine too! I got a book “Rehabilitate, rewire, recover” by Tabitha and it’s brilliant! I also listen to her podcasts and other ones like Life unrestricted and Food psych about health at every size, body positivity
I do adore you Megsy. Look... I think a break would be great for you. Get some time away from external voices and listen too your own my darling. Someone said to me at the start of my recovery journey... your life is bigger then your ED. Really put it into perspective for me 😁 you say only a few weeks but you take as long as you need. We will all be here when and if your ready to come back for your lovley chats. You inspire so many, myself included, so thank you 😘 lots if love and hopefully hear from you soon 💙
Definitely put your recovery first! I understand completely the disconnection you described from not being able to accept that the ED voice is separate from your own. Something that has helped me is actually from another UA-camr, Daphne Fischer. She talks about how instead of challenging the thoughts, she works on treating the thoughts with compassion but also making sure to acknowledge that the thoughts are not true or not helpful. Probably did not describe that the best way, but you should check out her videos!
Thanks, a couple of people have mentioned her. I really need to give her a go. I've been really into Tabitha Farrar, damn the diets, and follow the intuition recently
Megsy Recovery all great ones!! I actually just found someone new, a girl named Rachel on the channel Ladle by Ladle. I love the different range of personalities that are currently making recovery videos.
Heyyyy, Regardless of whether or not you continue doing vlogs at the mo, I think many will relate to RTÉ 'talking the talk versus walking the walk' as well as the 'plateau' or 'stuck' or 'I'm fine now', phase in recovery. No one does it purposely and its sneaky and subconscious, which makes it tricky to notice, stop and move forward from. What I've found helpful us to not overthink it, to address it, to acknowledge, to not stress, worry or judge myself for it happening and to start working ASAP on it continuing and instead, progressing. You can do it. Xxxx
i absolutely LOVE you and love your vlogs. So happy you are taking care of yourself. Looking forward to your return but more than that I wish for you the full, abundant, free life you deserve. You get to help yourself long before you help others. I think you are amazing. you are so gifted in sharing your thoughts and are beautiful inside and out. take care!!! 💕💕💕
Glad you're doing what is right for you! I found the same thing, when I started making the videos about recovery I found that it was a way anorexia was trying to keep itself in my world in some form and it took over from my usual UA-cam content and I just felt like I was being watched as I changed and the thing is some of my experiences were different and people would get angry or tell me the opposite to what my doctors were saying, somebody even had the cheek to tell me I was recovered HA! Wish you the best still
Meg, you're making the best decision here - your health should always take priority! You've been incredibly insightful in all of your videos, you've helped so many people and are such a positive role model here in the 'community', but that should not be at the expense of your own health and safety. Whatever decision you make, you have everyone supporting you! Take care 💗💗
The big thing I took from this video was the way you explain how your bubble has gotten bigger but is still separate from the world everyone else lives in..so true! My bubble makes me feel "safe" and "special". It is lonely though. Looking at it this way makes it easier for me to visualize the issue with partial recovery. Anywhoo... I hope you know you don't ever owe anyone an explanation for taking a break and doing whatever you need to do to recover!
Also, you don't have to be perfect to be an amazing role model! This is kinda embarrassing but I find myself saying "what would megsy do??" when I feel stuck lol
I totally get how you feel - I often get stuck & out of reality myself (in recovery for 5 years already and still far away from being healthy). I am glad you are sharing your thoughts cuz it's good to know this is kind of a normal thing and not feel too bad about it. Thank you for doing what you're doing. 💜
I really respect what you have said in this vlog so much. It's hard not to get stuck in the "good enough" phase. I feel like I am exactly where you are right now. Eating and generally doing well but still having one toe in the ED pond. It's a hard thing to let go of but something we must do to be completely free. Thanks for being so raw and honest!
This is the STRONGEST THING you could do! I can wholeheartedly relate to that "talking the talk" scenario, i've fallen into that trap countless times and i think it's a risk for anyone who discusses recovery on a public platform - it can distort our own perception. I think this is where external input helps so much! You're right, it's much easier to see it from someone else's perspective than our own - why so many people understandably find your videos helpful. But ultimately your biggest priority is YOU. Speaking about this is the best thing you could do for your recovery. Also, it's showing that you are only human. YOU are still recovering too, and that's okay. It's okay to still be in that process and it doesn't mean you haven't progressed! Think how long you lived by anorexia's rules,. It's natural that they won't go overnight, but the more we practice those positive actions - anti-ed actions - the easier they will become in time. I don't know if you've ever done an anxiety curve? But it helped me practice exposure therapy, as it explains that it's NORMAL for anxiety to be higher initially, but it also means the anxiety will fade more quickly. Sending all my love to you and be kind for yourself. For what it's worth, this is one of my favourite ever videos of yours, as it's you being HUMAN. Do what's right for you xxxx
Hiii, thanks so much for the message. Yes I have, is this the idea that over time it does just pass naturally, and that you have to get through the initial peak anxiety? I'm so on board with exposure therapy with ED treatment, I've found it's the only way to re-learn my faulty thoughts and habits
We absolutely support you in your decisions. You have to do what is best for you! Your psychologist sounds amazing and you should definitely listen to her. You are amazing and strong. xx
Blimey your blogs are brilliant and you put it across so clear and thank God you have such a nice voice and easy to listen to we are lucky to have you with such fab advice thanks for sharing xx
I totally hear you, and thank you as always for your videos. My thoughts (what tends to work for me in terms of knowing you're pushing forward, despite the probable anxiety associated) is if any decision re: food and exercise (anything in between) is coming from fear, then it's perhaps going to benefit you so much more to go with the option/s that scare you. Of course it won't be easy, but it sure as heck will counteract the active eating disorder and work towards the mental shift and freedom (as well as any physical/nutritional rehabilitation that your body might need (of course every body is different and wonderful)). I usually can now recognise very quickly when anything threatens my anorexia, and i just do my best to quash them. Sometimes it can be great to just counter multiple ones at the same time if required or necessary. It'll only get you to absolute/total freedom mentally and physically. But hey whatever will help you just be totally free when it's all said and done. You do you. You know your mind and body and soul. Keep being your amazing self 😊😎🌻🌼🌈
Thanks for your message, that's so good if you've got your radar out. My psychologist would say recognise the DVD is playing and EJECT it straight away!
Megsy Recovery for sure! You do whatever will be beneficial for you and your life. You have SO much insight and your determination to recover is inspirational tbh. You've got this, legit.
So much love and admiration for you, keep fighting xxx Isn't it ironic that finding a touch more freedom can fool us into complacency and prevent us reaching full freedom! I relate to your confusion so much at the moment. I think it's easy to underestimate how hard the later stages of recovery are. But if you have found the incredible strength to expand your bubble this much, you can find the strength to keep pushing those boundaries further and it will be so so worth it. I hope that a break gives you a bit more clarity. You seem so insightful already which will really help. Rooting for you!
I actually loved the analogy with the green sky so much that I wrote it down on the board on my wall so I can see it every day. I know it's hard to question all these thoughts in your head when they've been the ultimate truth for so long. We need to remember that we shouldn't believe everything we are thinking. I hope the break will help you to sort things out a little bit. It's so important to put your own recovery first! Take care ♥
My favorite youtube!!! Its so true that its scary to discover what life's like after recovery. it seemed so weird to go from sick to recovery, and then have to jump out of that safety net. Even though I don't exercise or revolve my whole life around my body, there is a strange nostalgia of missing my sick/recovery life even though it was so painful.
Ugh the rose tinted glasses BS. It's a load of rubbish, maybe there is a small high or "security" associated with the illness, but is it really worth all the other shit that goes along with it and sacrificing your whole life for? Hair fall out, cold, tired, think of food all the time.... Is it really that good?
Megsy thank you for your brilliant British sense of humour. I am going to borrow your BLUE/GREEN sky metaphor when trying to explain my brain to people. Looking forward to seeing you when you come back Elly🇬🇧🇬🇧🇬🇧
Haha yay the sarcastic and inappropriate British humour! Yeh that's what I do with the blue/green sky, try to use it to explain to others why I'm finding it so hard to challenge my thoughts. Try to show them what it feels like in my brain and with my ED reality. hope it helps hun xxx
Wow. Just wow. This video was like my own thoughts on ED recovery were formulated and narrated by you. This is so much true that it is just unbelievable. Fingers crossed for all of us suffering, we can do it! :-)
I'm feeling all the same feeling that my plane in recovery as well. I totally support you and believe in you and you should do whatever is best for you!
It scares me how quickly you can fall back into old patterns and it's like if you give the ED an inch it will take a mile. I have so much anxiety over this, every day I'm like "have I done enough today to battle my ED?" - this was really helpful Meg 😍
Awwww Megsy 😢 im going to miss you!!!! But you know what.....its YOUR recovery and YOU need to take a break and think all through. Best of luck, keep it up and can't wait to see you again. Lots of love 💕🌹😘
I have been following your channel and have found them really helpful and insightful. Thanks a lot. Sometimes I think you are directly talking to me 😂 To be honest some of your videos have motivated me to challenge some fear foods on my own, it's hard but feel it's been really good! Glad I'm doing it. I certainly think you should be proud of yourself in how far you have come, you must have a great rapport with your psychologist. She sounds great! I think you are making a really wise decision more importantly for yourself, for your recovery. ♥️
This is amazing. I will be so sad if you stop making videos but will be happy for you for making the decision to focus on your health if that seems right for you. I totally relate. I am not binging or purging but i do have safe foods (that are so out of my eating disorder comfort zone) but some foods seem way scary and i do keep track of what I eat. Not calories just in general as I am deleting
I honestly think we all need to regularly do these reality checks in recovery! It's very normal to get stuck and too comfortable from time to time in recovery. That your psychologist made you aware of this and you talking about it here, might already help you a great deal in getting unstuck. ED thoughts are easily creeping back in, we have to stay very alert. And like you said, it can be so difficult to recognize what is your own thought and what is an ED thought. So, I am not sure if making these videos is causing you to get stuck or that it might just be a normal part of recovery for most of us. But it is very important of course that recording all this is not distracting you from focussing on your own progress. I don't think it was too personal or triggering at all. Your videos always help me a great deal and I am very grateful for what you are doing here! And although you might feel a little stuck right now, please recognize that you also really have made huge progress and that is really something. Take your time! Thanks for being an inspiration!
This is such a gorgeous message, thank you so much!! Yeh I don't think it's just the videos getting me stuck, I agree it's a totally normal occurrence in recovery, I just want to make sure I address it. Honestly thanks so much, love this message xxx
I commend you for making this decision to put yourself first and will be sending you kind wishes all the way. Take all the time you need as you are the most important person in your journey. Take care sweetie 💕
P.S Meg it took me all day to finally sit down & watch this, put a smile 😊 on my face this Morning as you put your vlog out on My Birthday 🍰 & Mothers Day! Will Miss you 😘 😘 🇦🇺
(Not Grant Winestock but his wife, lol) Very helpful, you vocalized my same struggles and thoughts. Thank you for being you and so honest and open and lovely. :)
Megsy, it's absolutely ok that you take care of yourself and stop vlogging for a while! I could see the deep struggle in your eyes when you said it (and the struggle with your frappuchino as well) - and this struggle made me really sad. Just do what feels right for you! Some day you'll be back and I'm looking forward to this moment! But at one point - inspite of all the sadness - I really had to laugh: When you said, that you've made some vlogs that you will post in the next weeks. Why I had to laugh? Because last week we talked about saving calories, hoarding food, hoarding petrol - and now I thought: "She's even hoarding VLOGS!" :-) You're sooo awesome and very special unique and wonderful person! Love you!
Hahahahaha yeh I was thinking "oh my god is this my perfectionism?" Like I can't leave it without a vlog for a weekend haha. I actually love making them so it was fine to make, but yeh haha. I laughed as well
Yes, I also think it could be your perfectionism. You want to have organized it all as good as possible. And probably it's that you are taking care of the community (which ist sooo awesome) like you said: "Don't leave them alone without a vlog." If you like it, thats fine! But make sure not to take pressure on yourself! And then I think, you should listen to your heart whether or when to continue with making vlogs. Not continue just because the community "thinks you should" and not stopping because your psychologist wants you to. I would just listen to your heart what feels right and is the best for you and your health and progress - and then just du THIS! I'm sure you find your way! But always without pressure! Just important what YOU want!!!
BTW: I've got a job in which I also have to organize sometimes for situation when I'm not available for my clients. And then I do it like you do with the vlogs: I don't want to leave my clients "alone" and I'm trying to organize for the future as good as I can. And that's really similar. For example: "report-hoarding" oder "remittance-hoarding" - just to get sure to leave everything perfect while I am away. So I know the pressure you can make yourself! It's just this damn perfectionsm... Maybe something to work on: There will nothing bad happen if you have a weekend without a vlog! Ok, sureley I would miss your vlog! But probably you would not lose the community if there would be one weekend without a vlog! As I said: Just take care of yourself and listen to your heart!
You say you're confused a couple of times, but I just want to say that what you say does makes allot of sense! I think it's great that you do a reality check, that indeed is also the reality of recovery. Oh and I feel like I say this every time, but every time I watch you I just think you are so great! You might not live up to your own standerds, but just keep in mind that you do really live up to mine!!
It will be very interesting to hear your thoughts when and if you decide to vlog again. Will the break allow you to see things more clearly, and shine a light on areas that need work? Anyway, I wish you the best; you have been so very helpful in my own recovery, and you will be missed. Many blessings and good thoughts sent your way!
MEG❤️SY Beautiful, don’t know what lead me to your channel but have loved following your journey! Your amazing & given hope to lots of people. Fully Understand that sometimes in life we have to step back, breathe & take time out for ourselves no matter what situation! A Quote for you....... THE MOST BEAUTIFUL PEOPLE WE HAVE KNOWN ARE THOSE WHO HAVE KNOWN DEFEAT, KNOWN SUFFERING, KNOWN STRUGGLE, KNOWN LOSS, & HAVE FOUND THEIR WAY OUT OF DEPTHS. THESE PERSONS HAVE AN APPRECIATION, A SENSITIVITY, & AN UNDERSTANDING OF LIFE THAT FILLS THEM WITH COMPASSION, GENTLENESS, & A DEEP LOVING CONCERN. BEAUTIFUL PEOPLE DO NOT JUST HAPPEN... - Elizabeth Kubler Ros. Your Beauty Meg shines in & out! I will hug 🤗 you with my Prayers & always remember you are surrounded & lifted up by your Beautiful Family .. Love Rita, Take Care.. 🙏🏻🙇♀️ 🙋🏻♀️
What a lovely message, thank you sweetie! Agree that we grow and become compassionate through our own struggles... Which life is always going to have. Happy birthday again xxx
Can you make a video of your amazing recipes? To kind of have them all in one place? I have loooved a couple of your morning oat recipes but I can never remember which videos they are in or where to find them when I need them or want them. :( Keep pushing on. You are incredibly strong smart and funny you will get through this!
Aghhhh I don't know if I could make them all. Also I totally play about. My basic recipe is always double milk to oat ration, 1 tbsp chia seeds, 1 tbsp maple syrup, 1/2 tsp vanilla essence.... Then I add something in like carrots, apple, chocolate, raisins.... Then top with peanut butter, chocolate sauce, nuts, seeds, fruit etc...
Hi Megan, we support the choices you make! I think you should be proud you are able to to this! Also, do you realise the confusion also means you're pushing yourself and making progress? Lots of love and wishing you luck!
Its totally ok and understandable! It’s good and brave of you to take a time out from vlogging! You are an amazing inspiration to me! Take care, you are strong and I believe for a 100% you will recover! Xx @recoverin_afleur (I also asked you something on Instagram but I didn’t knew you were taking a break, so I’m sorry for that)
Hey Megan, i love your channel! I was wondering if you ever feel like if you have a bite/sip of something you feel like you have to eat it and or feeling like you can’t have a bite/sip of someone’s else’s food/drink
What if my BMI is on the edge of ‘underweight/normal’...am I not considered anorexic? Some days I’m in denial and think I don’t have a ED but then I catch my thoughts that show that I do but yet visually I don’t think I’m ‘skinny’ enough to look like I have a ED....
Did you ever think about taking time off work. I have this huge training I am supposed to teach next month that lasts 10 months and it is stressing me out in early recovery. I want to pull out of it but it will be a massive deal. I can’t decide if teaching it would be good for me to do the training. I will be in a more healthy place so maybe it will help me grow... or will it trigger me back to Ed and I should pull out. Sigh. I just can’t decide.
Do you feel you are recording those videos so people can see you are doing better? Like for example even if I decide I would buy a pizza or ice cream I feel the need to tell my boyfriend or my mom so they can appreciate it...like it is not worth doing it if no one knows.Like it is not a victory if people don't "applaud it"...so do you think you include your breakfast in allyour videos etc? Like if you speak/record after you eat it, you won't think that you need more. Because when I eat alone, when I fnish my meal I usually feel like I am still hungry...and this does not happen if I eat with other people.Like I do not have the time to obsess over food.
Hi, Kimberly is right, don't think number sharing is healthy as everyone's body's will be different at different BMIs. Some people might be recovered where I am now, but I am not
I have had this thought when watching you eating a meal/snack - you make your meals all ‘pretty’ and you have the same things. And whilst eating you constantly commenting about the food, ideas that non-ed people would not notice. I know this is an ed channel, but the food doesn’t need to look like a beautiful cookbook meal, and most wouldn’t constantly thinking/commenting about absolutely every aspect about the foodthis is melting to fast or I eat the peanut butter last for example. Or for example in this video you commented about the straw and marshmallow interactions multiple times at the end of the drink. I do think you are really trying and admire your insight and trying to recover from a hard illness but I have recently noticed things before you mentioned your psychs opinion. It almost seems that you have a disordered drive to make everything perfect in your videos - not just the food looking fancy, you always being dressed and presented nicely, with nice background, perfect temperature, with nice plates/cutlery, always having your cats wander over and offer them human food, commenting about every little crumb you drop, just lots of rituals that are ok a couple of times, but it almost feels you are justifying eating nice looking food etc because it is being put on UA-cam. I think you are wonderful and think of yourself first before hoping your videos help others. It is time to be selfish, you should be putting yourself first and it shouldn’t matter if the videos are helpful for anyone else but you. You deserve it. It’s time to really recover. I would say I never think about food at work until I am hungry. And don’t think about dinner until heading home, passing the shops I will think what is in my cupboard that is about to die and do I need to stop to buy an ingredient. If you need accountability record yourself, you don’t need to post it. But I’m sorry I can see what your psych is saying. Do what is best for you. Maybe that means different types of videos or filming without preplanning every moment. But you seem so sweet and kind, the world needs a healthy Megsy, not a disordered one. And most importantly you deserve a ED free life.
Wow, thanks for watching and taking the time to comment. That's some very honest and blunt feedback. Hope you don't mind if I respond with the same honesty... You're exactly right. It is an ED channel and this is why I point out the ED thoughts/observations/experiences I have with food, e.g. drink melting too quick is difficult & I need to remind myself it is ok. Hopefully it is helpful and relate-able for the ED community & they can see me challenging these thoughts. UA-cam is anything but accountability of my eating or recovery. The reason I don't do different types of videos or film in life spontaneously is that I don't want to need to document everything I eat or do in my day, or other things that are happening in life. I actively try to just record one meal/snack and a chat with each video, and then I can stop filming and carry on living my life in private. That being said, I do take your point on the pretty food and perfection. One of the traps of social that I definitely notice and get annoyed by myself, so maybe I should try to challenge myself more on it. Thanks for your good wishes.
Megsy Recovery I really hoped I wasn’t taken as being nasty, I hesitated replying my motives are anything but, I just thought if you are contemplating things, it’s hard to see yourself, and I know a UA-cam video is only a glimpse of you. I just wanted the best for you, I think UA-cam can be a great tool, but can also be a hinderance, or morph onto a different issue. I only wish you the best.
If you find that your talking your thoughts out loud is helpful for you in making progress, then keep doing it. If it is going on in your head, constantly, it is so exhausting/confusing. I hope one day your brain talking food to you all day gets so tiring. It is so liberating to have that much more room in your brain to think about other stuff
Hi, not nasty no. It was quite blunt and honest, as I think my response probably was too. But I guess "putting yourself out there" (even though I try not to share too much of my personal life) opens you up to feedback and people are always going to have opinions. Anyway, totally agree UA-cam and also Insta can become a whole issue in itself and become it's own little world. That has been on my mind from the day I started this to be honest, that I really don't want to be sucked into a new ED world/identity, and also that I don't want to feel responsible/accountable via needing to post on UA-cam. Also, I did get the best wishes from your post, thank you!
As much as I love and appreciate your vlogs, please take care of yourself above all else. If your therapist tells you to stop or if you feel like stopping please don’t feel any pressure to keep making videos. ❤️
Thanks so much xxx
I stumbled upon this by accident and you vocalised everything that goes on in my head. This was the reality check that I needed that i was not prepared to articulate to myself honestly. Thank you
Hello! I just wanted to say - this summer I've been rewatching your videos to help me move on from exactly what you describe in this vlog - that '80% recovered' stage. It's been so helpful. I find it really ironic that despite the fact I commented 4 years ago in total agreement with you, it's taken me this long to accept that I'm stuck again and to recommit to recovery - FULL recovery! Definitely shows how easy it is to talk the talk without completely walking the walk... even when we genuinely believe we are! So yeah, this video in particular really called me out lol
I know that this time will be different - time to break free from the bubble for good. You've been such an inspiration to me over the past 4 or so years. I've been keeping the classic mantras in my head: 'feel shit and do it anyway', 'challenge repeat', 'food doesn't have to be perfect'... and even more so now that I'm challenging myself more actively again.
Much love x
Tottaly agree about eating "perfect" food in "perfect" conditions. Sometimes I also can't decide what to eat because I'm afraid I will regret and think "oooh, it would be nicer if I had that stuff instead". And also sometimes I prefer a salad in McDonalds instead of a cheeseburger just because it will take longer to eat. Or eating with chopsticks instead of a fork because it will take longer as well. Noticing what other people eat or buy at the grocery store is what I also experience. I remember times when I restricted a lot and I was like proud of my choices at the grocery store when other people buy cookies, bread etc. How naive I was)
Ugh yeh, so nothing to be proud of is it. At least you can learn that though and not fall for its BS in the future
You’re so open and real and that’s what we love about you! I totally get where your coming from and one of my fav quotes is “sometimes you have to go away and be alone for a little while to experience, appreciate and love yourself” ❤️
You do what’s best for you!!!😘😘😘
I was always wondering if some people actually following exactly what they are preaching or they are sharing their knowledge but still not quite there yet and I could tell they aren’t bc they don’t gain weight or get defensive about comments that might be confrontational or jump from place to place in their approaches that they were against of in prior videos... I think it’s important to take some information from recovery vlogs but still keep in prospective that those vloggers aren’t recovered yet and reality might be different
I love your videos and you are such a lovely person and it’s so hard to get out of our heads to see what’s real and what’s not...
Totally totally. Personally I only watched videos from recovered people at the moment (which I am not still). It helps me so much to see what I'm aiming for. Everyones different aren't they but that's just my stage right now. I like to see the other side. Tabitha Farrar, Damn the Diets, and follow the intuition are my favourites! x
Megsy Recovery
Mine too!
I got a book “Rehabilitate, rewire, recover” by Tabitha and it’s brilliant!
I also listen to her podcasts and other ones like Life unrestricted and Food psych about health at every size, body positivity
I do adore you Megsy. Look... I think a break would be great for you. Get some time away from external voices and listen too your own my darling. Someone said to me at the start of my recovery journey... your life is bigger then your ED. Really put it into perspective for me 😁 you say only a few weeks but you take as long as you need. We will all be here when and if your ready to come back for your lovley chats. You inspire so many, myself included, so thank you 😘 lots if love and hopefully hear from you soon 💙
Oh my god thank you so so so so much!! You're literally so kind. Honestly means a lot, thank you xxx
We are all here for you sweet take care of your self put your self first 💜 ❤ you xx
Really proud of you for being honest with yourself and choosing to do what's best for your recovery!
Thanks so much xxx
I could not be happier to have found your channel, thank you so much for putting these videos out! They have helped me so much xox
Definitely put your recovery first! I understand completely the disconnection you described from not being able to accept that the ED voice is separate from your own. Something that has helped me is actually from another UA-camr, Daphne Fischer. She talks about how instead of challenging the thoughts, she works on treating the thoughts with compassion but also making sure to acknowledge that the thoughts are not true or not helpful. Probably did not describe that the best way, but you should check out her videos!
Thanks, a couple of people have mentioned her. I really need to give her a go. I've been really into Tabitha Farrar, damn the diets, and follow the intuition recently
Megsy Recovery all great ones!! I actually just found someone new, a girl named Rachel on the channel Ladle by Ladle. I love the different range of personalities that are currently making recovery videos.
Heyyyy, Regardless of whether or not you continue doing vlogs at the mo, I think many will relate to RTÉ 'talking the talk versus walking the walk' as well as the 'plateau' or 'stuck' or 'I'm fine now', phase in recovery. No one does it purposely and its sneaky and subconscious, which makes it tricky to notice, stop and move forward from. What I've found helpful us to not overthink it, to address it, to acknowledge, to not stress, worry or judge myself for it happening and to start working ASAP on it continuing and instead, progressing. You can do it. Xxxx
Thanks, yes yes yes, it's not like i'm getting iller, just want to make sure I don't get comfortable here, so that's the next couple of weeks. Eek
i absolutely LOVE you and love your vlogs. So happy you are taking care of yourself. Looking forward to your return but more than that I wish for you the full, abundant, free life you deserve. You get to help yourself long before you help others. I think you are amazing. you are so gifted in sharing your thoughts and are beautiful inside and out. take care!!! 💕💕💕
Such a kind message, thank you so much for your kindness. And yeh agree can't help anyone if you haven't helped yourself first xxx
Glad you're doing what is right for you! I found the same thing, when I started making the videos about recovery I found that it was a way anorexia was trying to keep itself in my world in some form and it took over from my usual UA-cam content and I just felt like I was being watched as I changed and the thing is some of my experiences were different and people would get angry or tell me the opposite to what my doctors were saying, somebody even had the cheek to tell me I was recovered HA! Wish you the best still
Meg, you're making the best decision here - your health should always take priority! You've been incredibly insightful in all of your videos, you've helped so many people and are such a positive role model here in the 'community', but that should not be at the expense of your own health and safety.
Whatever decision you make, you have everyone supporting you! Take care 💗💗
The big thing I took from this video was the way you explain how your bubble has gotten bigger but is still separate from the world everyone else lives in..so true! My bubble makes me feel "safe" and "special". It is lonely though. Looking at it this way makes it easier for me to visualize the issue with partial recovery.
Anywhoo... I hope you know you don't ever owe anyone an explanation for taking a break and doing whatever you need to do to recover!
Also, you don't have to be perfect to be an amazing role model! This is kinda embarrassing but I find myself saying "what would megsy do??" when I feel stuck lol
Thats really kind, thank you. And yeh that bubble really speaks to me as well. Thanks for the support x
I totally get how you feel - I often get stuck & out of reality myself (in recovery for 5 years already and still far away from being healthy). I am glad you are sharing your thoughts cuz it's good to know this is kind of a normal thing and not feel too bad about it.
Thank you for doing what you're doing. 💜
I really respect what you have said in this vlog so much. It's hard not to get stuck in the "good enough" phase. I feel like I am exactly where you are right now. Eating and generally doing well but still having one toe in the ED pond. It's a hard thing to let go of but something we must do to be completely free. Thanks for being so raw and honest!
Totally, ugh! How to get unstuck. Let's see, I'm going to spend the next couple of weeks really focused and trying to break through
This is the STRONGEST THING you could do! I can wholeheartedly relate to that "talking the talk" scenario, i've fallen into that trap countless times and i think it's a risk for anyone who discusses recovery on a public platform - it can distort our own perception. I think this is where external input helps so much!
You're right, it's much easier to see it from someone else's perspective than our own - why so many people understandably find your videos helpful. But ultimately your biggest priority is YOU. Speaking about this is the best thing you could do for your recovery. Also, it's showing that you are only human. YOU are still recovering too, and that's okay.
It's okay to still be in that process and it doesn't mean you haven't progressed! Think how long you lived by anorexia's rules,. It's natural that they won't go overnight, but the more we practice those positive actions - anti-ed actions - the easier they will become in time. I don't know if you've ever done an anxiety curve? But it helped me practice exposure therapy, as it explains that it's NORMAL for anxiety to be higher initially, but it also means the anxiety will fade more quickly.
Sending all my love to you and be kind for yourself. For what it's worth, this is one of my favourite ever videos of yours, as it's you being HUMAN. Do what's right for you xxxx
Hiii, thanks so much for the message. Yes I have, is this the idea that over time it does just pass naturally, and that you have to get through the initial peak anxiety? I'm so on board with exposure therapy with ED treatment, I've found it's the only way to re-learn my faulty thoughts and habits
We absolutely support you in your decisions. You have to do what is best for you! Your psychologist sounds amazing and you should definitely listen to her. You are amazing and strong. xx
Thanks, yeh I really do respect her opinion. Thanks for the support x
Blimey your blogs are brilliant and you put it across so clear and thank God you have such a nice voice and easy to listen to we are lucky to have you with such fab advice thanks for sharing xx
Gonna miss all your analogies while you're gone but I'm really glad you're listening to your psychologist and prioritizing your own recovery!
Thank you! x
I totally hear you, and thank you as always for your videos. My thoughts (what tends to work for me in terms of knowing you're pushing forward, despite the probable anxiety associated) is if any decision re: food and exercise (anything in between) is coming from fear, then it's perhaps going to benefit you so much more to go with the option/s that scare you. Of course it won't be easy, but it sure as heck will counteract the active eating disorder and work towards the mental shift and freedom (as well as any physical/nutritional rehabilitation that your body might need (of course every body is different and wonderful)). I usually can now recognise very quickly when anything threatens my anorexia, and i just do my best to quash them. Sometimes it can be great to just counter multiple ones at the same time if required or necessary. It'll only get you to absolute/total freedom mentally and physically. But hey whatever will help you just be totally free when it's all said and done.
You do you. You know your mind and body and soul.
Keep being your amazing self 😊😎🌻🌼🌈
Thanks for your message, that's so good if you've got your radar out. My psychologist would say recognise the DVD is playing and EJECT it straight away!
Megsy Recovery for sure! You do whatever will be beneficial for you and your life. You have SO much insight and your determination to recover is inspirational tbh. You've got this, legit.
So much love and admiration for you, keep fighting xxx
Isn't it ironic that finding a touch more freedom can fool us into complacency and prevent us reaching full freedom! I relate to your confusion so much at the moment. I think it's easy to underestimate how hard the later stages of recovery are. But if you have found the incredible strength to expand your bubble this much, you can find the strength to keep pushing those boundaries further and it will be so so worth it.
I hope that a break gives you a bit more clarity. You seem so insightful already which will really help. Rooting for you!
Totally, and how long before that bigger bubble starts shrinking down again. Ugh. So want to move past being stuck into the full freedom like you say
LOVE THIS VIDEO!! I needed to hear this!! Hope u come back soon but so respect your decision! YOU ARE NOT PREACHY EVER❤❤❤
That's good to hear, thank you. I always worry that haha. I've still got a couple of videos to post anyway xx
I actually loved the analogy with the green sky so much that I wrote it down on the board on my wall so I can see it every day. I know it's hard to question all these thoughts in your head when they've been the ultimate truth for so long. We need to remember that we shouldn't believe everything we are thinking.
I hope the break will help you to sort things out a little bit. It's so important to put your own recovery first! Take care ♥
Thanks so much xxx
Always always put yourself before anything else. You have come so far and I am so proud of you xx
Thanks so much, I'll be back, just want a little space to make sure I'm still pushing forwards and making progress xxx
My favorite youtube!!! Its so true that its scary to discover what life's like after recovery. it seemed so weird to go from sick to recovery, and then have to jump out of that safety net. Even though I don't exercise or revolve my whole life around my body, there is a strange nostalgia of missing my sick/recovery life even though it was so painful.
Ugh the rose tinted glasses BS. It's a load of rubbish, maybe there is a small high or "security" associated with the illness, but is it really worth all the other shit that goes along with it and sacrificing your whole life for? Hair fall out, cold, tired, think of food all the time.... Is it really that good?
Megsy thank you for your brilliant British sense of humour. I am going to borrow your BLUE/GREEN sky metaphor when trying to explain my brain to people.
Looking forward to seeing you when you come back
Elly🇬🇧🇬🇧🇬🇧
Haha yay the sarcastic and inappropriate British humour! Yeh that's what I do with the blue/green sky, try to use it to explain to others why I'm finding it so hard to challenge my thoughts. Try to show them what it feels like in my brain and with my ED reality. hope it helps hun xxx
Wow. Just wow. This video was like my own thoughts on ED recovery were formulated and narrated by you. This is so much true that it is just unbelievable. Fingers crossed for all of us suffering, we can do it! :-)
I'm feeling all the same feeling that my plane in recovery as well. I totally support you and believe in you and you should do whatever is best for you!
I'm so glad you made this video-- thanks for sharing your current thoughts and struggles. You're a gem because you are so real.
It scares me how quickly you can fall back into old patterns and it's like if you give the ED an inch it will take a mile. I have so much anxiety over this, every day I'm like "have I done enough today to battle my ED?" - this was really helpful Meg 😍
Awwww Megsy 😢 im going to miss you!!!! But you know what.....its YOUR recovery and YOU need to take a break and think all through. Best of luck, keep it up and can't wait to see you again. Lots of love 💕🌹😘
Thanks so much, so kind xxx
"Food doesn't have to be perfect" ……… Thank you for introducing me to this brand new concept!! ;- )
I have been following your channel and have found them really helpful and insightful. Thanks a lot. Sometimes I think you are directly talking to me 😂 To be honest some of your videos have motivated me to challenge some fear foods on my own, it's hard but feel it's been really good! Glad I'm doing it.
I certainly think you should be proud of yourself in how far you have come, you must have a great rapport with your psychologist. She sounds great!
I think you are making a really wise decision more importantly for yourself, for your recovery. ♥️
She's an absolute angel, honestly!! So glad it's helping, keep challenging and recognising how much better your life becomes for it xxx
This is amazing. I will be so sad if you stop making videos but will be happy for you for making the decision to focus on your health if that seems right for you. I totally relate. I am not binging or purging but i do have safe foods (that are so out of my eating disorder comfort zone) but some foods seem way scary and i do keep track of what I eat. Not calories just in general as I am deleting
Yep, trying to recover within boundaries still, doesn;t quite work does it
great video.. really makes me think of where i am in recovery and if i am still in my own little bubble
I honestly think we all need to regularly do these reality checks in recovery! It's very normal to get stuck and too comfortable from time to time in recovery. That your psychologist made you aware of this and you talking about it here, might already help you a great deal in getting unstuck. ED thoughts are easily creeping back in, we have to stay very alert. And like you said, it can be so difficult to recognize what is your own thought and what is an ED thought. So, I am not sure if making these videos is causing you to get stuck or that it might just be a normal part of recovery for most of us. But it is very important of course that recording all this is not distracting you from focussing on your own progress. I don't think it was too personal or triggering at all. Your videos always help me a great deal and I am very grateful for what you are doing here! And although you might feel a little stuck right now, please recognize that you also really have made huge progress and that is really something. Take your time! Thanks for being an inspiration!
This is such a gorgeous message, thank you so much!! Yeh I don't think it's just the videos getting me stuck, I agree it's a totally normal occurrence in recovery, I just want to make sure I address it. Honestly thanks so much, love this message xxx
You're welcome! 😊
I commend you for making this decision to put yourself first and will be sending you kind wishes all the way. Take all the time you need as you are the most important person in your journey. Take care sweetie 💕
Thanks so much, that's really sweet x
you are wonderful meg! you have helped me so much and i hope this blog helps you just as much as it does for me
P.S Meg it took me all day to finally sit down & watch this, put a smile 😊 on my face this Morning as you put your vlog out on My Birthday 🍰 & Mothers Day! Will Miss you 😘 😘 🇦🇺
Awwww HAPPY BIRTHDAY!!!! Hope you had a lovely day and good cake xx
Megsy Recovery 🙏🏻 Cake 🍰 as you said once in your vlog, “LIKE A MEERKAT” 🙊 HILARIOUS 🤣😂
(Not Grant Winestock but his wife, lol) Very helpful, you vocalized my same struggles and thoughts. Thank you for being you and so honest and open and lovely. :)
"not Grant Winestock but his wife" made me laugh out loud. hahaha. Thanks lovely xxx
Do what you need to do in order for you to recover, we will all support you x
So sweet, thank you x
Megsy, it's absolutely ok that you take care of yourself and stop vlogging for a while! I could see the deep struggle in your eyes when you said it (and the struggle with your frappuchino as well) - and this struggle made me really sad. Just do what feels right for you! Some day you'll be back and I'm looking forward to this moment!
But at one point - inspite of all the sadness - I really had to laugh: When you said, that you've made some vlogs that you will post in the next weeks. Why I had to laugh? Because last week we talked about saving calories, hoarding food, hoarding petrol - and now I thought: "She's even hoarding VLOGS!" :-)
You're sooo awesome and very special unique and wonderful person!
Love you!
Hahahahaha yeh I was thinking "oh my god is this my perfectionism?" Like I can't leave it without a vlog for a weekend haha. I actually love making them so it was fine to make, but yeh haha. I laughed as well
Yes, I also think it could be your perfectionism. You want to have organized it all as good as possible. And probably it's that you are taking care of the community (which ist sooo awesome) like you said: "Don't leave them alone without a vlog." If you like it, thats fine! But make sure not to take pressure on yourself!
And then I think, you should listen to your heart whether or when to continue with making vlogs. Not continue just because the community "thinks you should" and not stopping because your psychologist wants you to. I would just listen to your heart what feels right and is the best for you and your health and progress - and then just du THIS!
I'm sure you find your way! But always without pressure! Just important what YOU want!!!
BTW: I've got a job in which I also have to organize sometimes for situation when I'm not available for my clients. And then I do it like you do with the vlogs: I don't want to leave my clients "alone" and I'm trying to organize for the future as good as I can. And that's really similar. For example: "report-hoarding" oder "remittance-hoarding" - just to get sure to leave everything perfect while I am away. So I know the pressure you can make yourself! It's just this damn perfectionsm...
Maybe something to work on: There will nothing bad happen if you have a weekend without a vlog! Ok, sureley I would miss your vlog! But probably you would not lose the community if there would be one weekend without a vlog!
As I said: Just take care of yourself and listen to your heart!
You say you're confused a couple of times, but I just want to say that what you say does makes allot of sense! I think it's great that you do a reality check, that indeed is also the reality of recovery. Oh and I feel like I say this every time, but every time I watch you I just think you are so great! You might not live up to your own standerds, but just keep in mind that you do really live up to mine!!
Awwww bless you, yeh good to just check in every now and then and not be fooled into standing still
this was extremely eye opening and motivating as usual. thank uuuu!!!!
Best of everything to you. I totally feel ya on this video💗.
I wish you all the best, and I hope you find what you're looking for during your break! Stay strong, I know you are
It will be very interesting to hear your thoughts when and if you decide to vlog again. Will the break allow you to see things more clearly, and shine a light on areas that need work? Anyway, I wish you the best; you have been so very helpful in my own recovery, and you will be missed. Many blessings and good thoughts sent your way!
Thanks for the support, I've still got a couple of videos to post anyway. Let's see what light I find haha xx
SO SO proud of you for recognising this! Do what is best for you lovely xoxo
Do what's best for you. Take your time!
❤️ Ohh now it is sooo helpful for me!!!
You look great and I’m so envious of that drink looks so good
Love your videos megsy! Definitely take a break if you feel like it would be beneficial for you. Gonna miss your chats ❤️
Thanks so much. I've still got a couple of videos up my sleeve
for ya xxx
MEG❤️SY Beautiful, don’t know what lead me to your channel but have loved following your journey! Your amazing & given hope to lots of people. Fully Understand that sometimes in life we have to step back, breathe & take time out for ourselves no matter what situation! A Quote for you....... THE MOST BEAUTIFUL PEOPLE WE HAVE KNOWN ARE THOSE WHO HAVE KNOWN DEFEAT, KNOWN SUFFERING, KNOWN STRUGGLE, KNOWN LOSS, & HAVE FOUND THEIR WAY OUT OF DEPTHS. THESE PERSONS HAVE AN APPRECIATION, A SENSITIVITY, & AN UNDERSTANDING OF LIFE THAT FILLS THEM WITH COMPASSION, GENTLENESS, & A DEEP LOVING CONCERN. BEAUTIFUL PEOPLE DO NOT JUST HAPPEN... - Elizabeth Kubler Ros. Your Beauty Meg shines in & out! I will hug 🤗 you with my Prayers & always remember you are surrounded & lifted up by your Beautiful Family .. Love Rita, Take Care.. 🙏🏻🙇♀️ 🙋🏻♀️
What a lovely message, thank you sweetie! Agree that we grow and become compassionate through our own struggles... Which life is always going to have. Happy birthday again xxx
Megsy Recovery 😘 Thankyou so much Meg xx
Can you make a video of your amazing recipes? To kind of have them all in one place? I have loooved a couple of your morning oat recipes but I can never remember which videos they are in or where to find them when I need them or want them. :(
Keep pushing on. You are incredibly strong smart and funny you will get through this!
Aghhhh I don't know if I could make them all. Also I totally play about. My basic recipe is always double milk to oat ration, 1 tbsp chia seeds, 1 tbsp maple syrup, 1/2 tsp vanilla essence.... Then I add something in like carrots, apple, chocolate, raisins.... Then top with peanut butter, chocolate sauce, nuts, seeds, fruit etc...
You help me so much and your so amazing❤️
Yep. Half way recovered here. Stopped short due to weight gain
Hi Megan, we support the choices you make! I think you should be proud you are able to to this! Also, do you realise the confusion also means you're pushing yourself and making progress? Lots of love and wishing you luck!
Thanks, that's actually quite a nice thought that the confusion in itself might be part of the progress. Thanks so much for your message xxx
we'll miss u but your own personal life should always come first !
Thanks so much xxx
Its totally ok and understandable! It’s good and brave of you to take a time out from vlogging! You are an amazing inspiration to me! Take care, you are strong and I believe for a 100% you will recover! Xx @recoverin_afleur (I also asked you something on Instagram but I didn’t knew you were taking a break, so I’m sorry for that)
Hey Megan, i love your channel!
I was wondering if you ever feel like if you have a bite/sip of something you feel like you have to eat it and or feeling like you can’t have a bite/sip of someone’s else’s food/drink
Hi, if I'm eating something I normally eat the whole thing, but sometimes I would bite/sip/try some one elses. Not sure if that helps, sorry
Thanks!
Great stuff!
What if my BMI is on the edge of ‘underweight/normal’...am I not considered anorexic? Some days I’m in denial and think I don’t have a ED but then I catch my thoughts that show that I do but yet visually I don’t think I’m ‘skinny’ enough to look like I have a ED....
Did you ever think about taking time off work. I have this huge training I am supposed to teach next month that lasts 10 months and it is stressing me out in early recovery. I want to pull out of it but it will be a massive deal. I can’t decide if teaching it would be good for me to do the training. I will be in a more healthy place so maybe it will help me grow... or will it trigger me back to Ed and I should pull out. Sigh. I just can’t decide.
Ya but the best way to learn is through teaching and also fake it til you make it
I'll miss you Meg!!😭
First 😉
Btw really like your videos!!
Food doesn't need to be perfect
Do you feel you are recording those videos so people can see you are doing better? Like for example even if I decide I would buy a pizza or ice cream I feel the need to tell my boyfriend or my mom so they can appreciate it...like it is not worth doing it if no one knows.Like it is not a victory if people don't "applaud it"...so do you think you include your breakfast in allyour videos etc? Like if you speak/record after you eat it, you won't think that you need more. Because when I eat alone, when I fnish my meal I usually feel like I am still hungry...and this does not happen if I eat with other people.Like I do not have the time to obsess over food.
I will miss you a lot. I wish I knew you
May i know what is your BMI?
The romantic flower She has said before that she doesn’t feel comfortable sharing numbers.
Hi, Kimberly is right, don't think number sharing is healthy as everyone's body's will be different at different BMIs. Some people might be recovered where I am now, but I am not
I have had this thought when watching you eating a meal/snack - you make your meals all ‘pretty’ and you have the same things. And whilst eating you constantly commenting about the food, ideas that non-ed people would not notice. I know this is an ed channel, but the food doesn’t need to look like a beautiful cookbook meal, and most wouldn’t constantly thinking/commenting about absolutely every aspect about the foodthis is melting to fast or I eat the peanut butter last for example. Or for example in this video you commented about the straw and marshmallow interactions multiple times at the end of the drink.
I do think you are really trying and admire your insight and trying to recover from a hard illness but I have recently noticed things before you mentioned your psychs opinion. It almost seems that you have a disordered drive to make everything perfect in your videos - not just the food looking fancy, you always being dressed and presented nicely, with nice background, perfect temperature, with nice plates/cutlery, always having your cats wander over and offer them human food, commenting about every little crumb you drop, just lots of rituals that are ok a couple of times, but it almost feels you are justifying eating nice looking food etc because it is being put on UA-cam. I think you are wonderful and think of yourself first before hoping your videos help others. It is time to be selfish, you should be putting yourself first and it shouldn’t matter if the videos are helpful for anyone else but you. You deserve it. It’s time to really recover. I would say I never think about food at work until I am hungry. And don’t think about dinner until heading home, passing the shops I will think what is in my cupboard that is about to die and do I need to stop to buy an ingredient.
If you need accountability record yourself, you don’t need to post it. But I’m sorry I can see what your psych is saying. Do what is best for you. Maybe that means different types of videos or filming without preplanning every moment.
But you seem so sweet and kind, the world needs a healthy Megsy, not a disordered one. And most importantly you deserve a ED free life.
Wow, thanks for watching and taking the time to comment. That's some very honest and blunt feedback. Hope you don't mind if I respond with the same honesty...
You're exactly right. It is an ED channel and this is why I point out the ED thoughts/observations/experiences I have with food, e.g. drink melting too quick is difficult & I need to remind myself it is ok. Hopefully it is helpful and relate-able for the ED community & they can see me challenging these thoughts.
UA-cam is anything but accountability of my eating or recovery. The reason I don't do different types of videos or film in life spontaneously is that I don't want to need to document everything I eat or do in my day, or other things that are happening in life. I actively try to just record one meal/snack and a chat with each video, and then I can stop filming and carry on living my life in private.
That being said, I do take your point on the pretty food and perfection. One of the traps of social that I definitely notice and get annoyed by myself, so maybe I should try to challenge myself more on it. Thanks for your good wishes.
Megsy Recovery I really hoped I wasn’t taken as being nasty, I hesitated replying my motives are anything but, I just thought if you are contemplating things, it’s hard to see yourself, and I know a UA-cam video is only a glimpse of you. I just wanted the best for you, I think UA-cam can be a great tool, but can also be a hinderance, or morph onto a different issue. I only wish you the best.
If you find that your talking your thoughts out loud is helpful for you in making progress, then keep doing it. If it is going on in your head, constantly, it is so exhausting/confusing. I hope one day your brain talking food to you all day gets so tiring. It is so liberating to have that much more room in your brain to think about other stuff
Hi, not nasty no. It was quite blunt and honest, as I think my response probably was too. But I guess "putting yourself out there" (even though I try not to share too much of my personal life) opens you up to feedback and people are always going to have opinions. Anyway, totally agree UA-cam and also Insta can become a whole issue in itself and become it's own little world. That has been on my mind from the day I started this to be honest, that I really don't want to be sucked into a new ED world/identity, and also that I don't want to feel responsible/accountable via needing to post on UA-cam. Also, I did get the best wishes from your post, thank you!