Understanding the Subtypes of Borderline Personality Disorder
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- Опубліковано 18 вер 2024
- Order The Borderline Personality Disorder Workbook by Dr. Fox: goo.gl/LQEgy1
We’re going to revisit BPD subtypes in this video and clarify some questions from the first one. A subtype is a different presentation or form of an idea or concept. For our purposes, “borderline personality disorder” is the general term we use for this disorder, and the subtypes are the specific presentations, or forms, of BPD.
Discouraged or “Quiet borderline” BPD
• Clingy
• Follow the crowd
• Dependent
Impulsive BPD
• Flirtatious, captivating, elusive, superficial
• Thrill seekers
• Highly energetic
Petulant BPD
• Unpredictable
• Irritable, complainers
• Impatient•
Self-Destructive BPD
• Impulsive
• Indecisive
• Between apologetic submissive to stubborn resistant
These are overlapping in many cases and can be situationally specific to person or place.
How do you understand more about BPD subtypes:
First, identify which type or types are most prevalent for you and start there. Then pair this with situations or with core content, those driving forces to engage in maladaptive patterns.
Let’s explore what we know so far. What’s the benefit to learning your BPD subtypes? This can help you build insight which helps you recognize issues to open the possibly to do things differently for yourself and use adaptive patterns to manage BPD symptoms and issues.
This is just the beginning to understanding yourself and BPD.
If you want to learn more, there is a subtype assessment and activity included in my workbook, the BPD workbook.
Daniel J. Fox, Ph.D., is a licensed psychologist in Texas, international speaker, and award winning author. He has been specializing in the treatment and assessment of individuals with personality disorders for over 15 years in the state and federal prison system, universities, and in private practice. His specialty areas include personality disorders, ethics, burnout prevention, and emotional intelligence.
He has published several articles in these areas and is the author of:
The Borderline Personality Disorder Workbook: An Integrative Program to Understand and Manage Your BPD. Now Available, you can order it now at: goo.gl/LQEgy1
Antisocial, Borderline, Narcissistic and Histrionic Workbook: Treatment Strategies for Cluster B Personality Disorders (IPBA Benjamin Franklin Gold Award Winner): goo.gl/BLRkFy
Narcissistic Personality Disorder Toolbox: 55 Practical Treatment Techniques for Clients, Their Parents & Their Children: goo.gl/sZYhym
The Clinician’s Guide to Diagnosis and Treatment of Personality Disorders: goo.gl/ZAVe9v
Dr. Fox has given numerous workshops and seminars on ethics and personality disorders, personality disorders and crime, treatment solutions for treating clients along the antisocial, borderline, narcissistic, and histrionic personality spectrum, emotional intelligence, managing mental health within the prison system, and others. Dr. Fox maintains a website of various treatment interventions focused on working with and attenuating the symptomatology related to individuals along the antisocial, borderline, narcissistic, and histrionic personality spectrum (www.drdfox.com).
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Dr. Fox’s website: www.drdfox.com/
Facebook: / appliedpsychservices
Twitter: / drdanieljfox1
LinkedIn: / drdfox
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Amazon Author’s Page: amazon.com/author/drfox
Thank you for your attention and I hope you enjoy my videos and find them helpful and subscribe. I always welcome topic suggestions and comments.
Citation:
Millon, Theodore; Carrie M. Millon; Seth Grossman; Sarah Meagher; Rowena Ramnath (2004). Personality Disorders in Modern Life. John Wiley and Sons.
I was very suspicious about my diagnosis at first, because I'm clearly not angry towards others. In fact I am not angry enough sometimes, I'm rather passive and submissive. My psychiatrist explained to me that I was in fact very angry towards myself, as I beat and mutilate my body, and belittle myself constantly. Also, I learned that 'quiet' BPD type and self-destructive are subtyped. We always have the image of the furious person, but it's not always the case! Thank you for your precious information. Can't wait to receive your book (it takes times as I live in France). All my best for the BPD community here, it's good not to feel alone...
I can completely relate to this. I think part of this feeling does also come from the stigma associated with BPD, which really didn't help me seek help. I'm also waiting for the book in Australia haha.
Don't forget that the anger/rage is also only one of nine criteria, and you only need five to have a diagnosis. It's entirely possible to not have that symptom; I don't either
Yes! I’ve totally had the same time experience with my bpd diagnosis! Having a lot of the symptoms of bpd, but keeping a lot of it to yourself (or taking it out on your family)
"but we can't punch anybody in the head, right?" HAHA your transparency and gentle nature really is a gift
No punching, be above it :)
Could you do a video on quiet borderline vs avoidant personality disorder?
yes!! please
Yes!! Please
Omg yes please!! I’m getting assessed for bpd and avpd currently and I honestly can’t figure out which one I fit with better!
PALEEEEEEEZE
Yes please, I am BPD AvPD comorbid
Youre a life saver, doc. Literally. Thanky you for all the time and energy you put into helping those of us with BPD.
I second that. ❤️👌
I third that 👌
Im glad you clarified that the sub types can and do overlap, because three of them are all me. 😐 I'm working on it. Meds help.
You have such a soothing voice, I like how you said “ok” after explaining something
Gabriella Neufeld look up asmr! A lot of dr asmr videos say “ok” a lot in their videos!
Just started your BPD workbook a few hours ago, taking a break from it, and found you have a new video here. Working through the attachment style section, I was shocked at how clear it is regarding the preoccupied and fearful being related to BPD. It is very helpful, and I feel hopeful for the first time in a while.
Can I ask you how did you get the book I can get off Amazon please. Thank you
Do you like the workbook so far? Is it the recently released one? I wish you luck for your struggle 💪👏
It is for sale on amazon, I ordered from Barnes and Noble
Yes, I think the new workbook is very good. I just started but I feel less alone and he shows that things can change. Thank you for your nice words, best of luck to you too.
@@ocpd23 thank you I will try to get it there
Quiet/Petulant/Self-Destructive here! DBT has helped me to recognize my part in my suffering, how I can heal myself without the help of my loved ones, and therefore has decreased my self-destructive tendencies when they can’t fulfill me. It’s been a long road but I’m happy to say that I’m a lot more social now and can use DBT skills and mindfulness daily to help me cope if I’m having trouble relating to others or I start getting negative thoughts about them or myself. I appreciate you making these videos because if I hadn’t found out what BPD was, I wouldn’t have gotten the help that I needed ❤️
You hit the nail in the head when you described how subtypes fluctuate between settings- that encapsulates what BPD is because we don't know who we are, so I guess we're just one type of BPD in one situation and another type in another haha
I am very different in different circumstances. I came across your videos when i was dx and you have helped me so greatly. I’m lucky enough to still be in the military with this diagnosis because I’ve learned to control my impulse emotions. Knowledge is the key to success and healing. I learned my negative coping skills as a kid in abuse. I’m an adult now and I work hard to make sure my kids will never experience the same things as me
Thank you for all the work you do. I haven't been able to find a psychologicist since I moved. And your videos give me hope to continue to work on bettering myself. I have Borderline Personality Disorder. But it does not define me.
Your videos really help me while I wonder who I can possibly go to that can possibly understand who I am, and finding another psychologist. It's still an ongoing process because I have a hard time opening up to new doctors.
But you give me hope. And I am ever so thankful for that.
You try to understand us and our emotions, help us deal with these emotions and your videos have made such an impact on my life while seeking a new mental health provider.
I cannot thank you enough. From the bottom of my heart, I appreciate the work you do.
Thank you Sir.
Petulant -fault finding
2)impulsive seductive
3)quiet or discouraged dependecy.
4 self distructive vacillate between quiet and impulsive
I really hope to find a therapist at least half as knowledgeable about BPD as you are, you are helping so many people with your compassionate approach. I appreciate you so much.
Hey Dr. Fox. I really enjoy this month series, it's been extremely helpful. I was wondering if you could talk about guilt with BPD. I have a lot of problems with feeling guilty because of my irregular emotions. I watched your video on shame and that kinda hit home. I just want some deeper information. Love your work and thank you for taking the time to care about people with borderline 💜
Guilt is a feeling of responsibility or remorse for some offense and shame is a painful feeling arising from the awareness of something improper. I will add it to the list. Thanks
I'm all of those subtypes depending on where and who I'm with. Also, I tend to differ from day to day.
Thank you for your videos. Could you do a talk on BPD and hypochondria/health anxiety?
Thank you for all your incredible knowledge-sharing and insight, and the thoroughness of your documentation on this channel. People like you are instrumental in overturning the stigma associated with such a misunderstood condition.
I see myself leaning towards the more destructive side lately, i think I am relapsing with my BPD, one of my major problems for the longest time was not being able to keep a job for very long but here lately, I stayed at the same job for 3.5 years but then I get transferred and then terminated a month later for bogus reasons and I was doing so well between 2015 and 2017 then I took on other jobs, got let go from most of them yet still maintaining this job, not only that, my truck broke down and my cat died all in the same damn week.
Thank you for sharing this. I would say I'm different sub types around different people but the impulsive part is gone
“Where did you get that preposterous hypothesis
Did Steve tell you that perchance?
Steve....”
-Flight of the Concords
in your workbook i got consistently similar averages between all but impulsive. i appreciate your mentioning of the prevalent overlap both in this and your prop bpd type videos. labels are tempting because they give a false sense of control over bpd and the illusion of a direct path... so your input in the overlap reaffirmed & grounded how people are complex and to focus on your triggers instead of specific symptoms and types!
Thank You Dr.Fox from Florida!
***You won’t see this and it’ll likely get lost in the sea of comments lol but,
back in late 2018 a video of yours helped me make sense of the intense disarray behind my maladaptive patterns and feelings of irreversible brokenness and the storms i brought into close relationships at that point and throughout my life ... you taught me what “ bpd lens “ was, “favorite person”, the black and white thinking, and especially helped when teaching me to manage Splitting. Immediatelyi felt understood and my “knowing” of being forever damaged was challenged.. moreso gradually i applied your techniques in managing my perceptions and emotions which ultimately helped me make sense of my bpd diagnosis and manage it effectively!
Shortly after regularly watching your videos i became receptive to the idea i could change and ended up seeking professional help and slowly opened up to loved ones (you helped me challenge the paranoia of them weaponizing my vulnerability and instead reassure myself they cared), i was later prescribed medication for MDD (u knowingly perpetuated by my bpd for almost all my life) and sought both professional help while watching+taking notes in a journal from your vids and slowly getting through your bpd workbook... it was lifechanging and now it’s summer 2021 and there are struggles yes, but i’m staying strong and still watching your videos if i feel hopeless or doubt in recovering!
Again i can’t thank you enough Dr. Fox
I am 62. In retrospect, I feel I've morphed into at least 3 of these types throughout my life.
Just bought the book ... thank you for all that you do.
Thank you so much for this video. I was doubting myself because I behave so differently with family / friends / people who I’m in love with / my favourite person.
Thanks :) very helpful. I did watch your original video on the 4 subtypes and that was very informative as well.
Yes I fit all the types depending on situation... I ordered your book, hope it will help
+Fuse Kane Me too. Please let me know how it goes.
It is amazing. I have struggled with some parts because of feelings that come up but the content is fantastic.
I was diagnosed with BPD two years ago-- I'm just now making the decision to start DBT again, I wasnt aware at the age of 18 of what was really happening with me in my life and I'm still always trying to process it or understand it more. I'm new to learning about subtypes, based off of this video I feel I resonate with all of them at different points in my life. What does this mean exactly?
I did the test in your book and got 2 types and one point away from the other 2 😂 I guess I just cycle through them all lol.
It's possible to have more than one. Most people do.
I think my fiance has BPD traits--as well as his diagnosed TBI and PTSD. (I'm not sure if you would qualify for a diagnosis of mixed personality disorder.)
This can be very challenging. On the one hand he's brilliant, on the other hand in men BPD traits tend to manifest as anger and narcissistic Tendencies. This is true of him.
When he's not engaging in these things he's very loving and empathetic and insightful and a deep person, also playful and wonderfully creative.
But the TBI (traumatic brain injury), PTSD, and the Borderline traits, plus narcissistic tendencies make it very hard. Thankfully he responded to my urging him to get back on medication and find more relevant and effective therapy. But it's three steps forward then one alarming big step back. Were it not for the effective medication and the very great therapist he found, our relationship probably wouldn't have survived, which would have been tragic, because we love each other very dearly.
Hey Dr. Fox, thanks again for all of your videos. I've learned so much from you. Do you think that any of these borderlines subtypes have the most similarities with vulnerable narcissists, e.g., seeing oneself as a victim, wanting to be rescued/taken care of, attempts to elicit sympathy/pity?
+Sean Millard interesting question but I think it’d be a hard fit into vul narcissism.
Which sub type wants to strangle the mocking bird? Just kidding. But seriously... Got your workbook. I love it. Don't tell anyone, but I think it's better than that DBT workbook.
Do you think the DBT handbook might resonate with a different audience? I suggest that because my psych (having delivered the BPD diagnosis after 4 years) expressed the opinion that DBT is not going to help me much because [in my own words] I've mellowed a lot with age and I've shifted into a physical and head space where the explosions of rage aren't so problematic.
I believe I’m more petulant bpd than the other subtypes personally, but also like you said they can overlap and I do agree 100%
I'm self destructive and petulant
Thank you so much, sir!
"You can't punch Steve in the head" ... this so appeals to my sense of the ridiculous.
I found this vid is useful in piecing together differing aspects of my own behaviour. Very useful. Another lightbulb moment.
I laughed when he said "but we can't punch Steve in the face." Boy, have I been there.
what you said about not describing a person by their disorder was so important. I think most psych professionals know this but some of them do it anyway and it makes the person who has the disorder not very great about themselves. I remember I used to watch jordan peterson's stuffs and he gave me too much of a condescending vibe that kinda just made me feel sad about myself. I like that you try to "relate" to our perspectives of how we may think or feel through examples.
I wanted to ask though, if you had a video specifically on quiet bpd; I know the basics, but I also learned that "quiet" bpd expresses emotions inwardly and may do things in secret (like self-harm, drinking, etc.). I want to learn more about it since I'm still discovering so many things about myself that I never knew were there but were _always_ there. I long for the day where I can finally get diagnosed and get the help I need and deserve.
I couldn't thank you enough for the dedication and help you've given. :')
I am very dependent but that is the only symptom I have from the quiet bpd subtype, I relate more strongly with PETULANT, and Self destructive
'And you don't want to punch Steve in the head', sir I thought you knew... I kid, lol.
Hey doc, i've been diagnosed with MDD and generalized anxiety with previous substance abuse but through chance and some research BPD has strongly resonated with me. The problem is my psychiatrist doesn't think I do but given the therapy that's helped the most (schema) and lack of progress with all other treatments as well as the misdiagnosis rate and underdiganosis for men it seems like a strong possibility. Would you have any advice for people like myself in this current situation?
I would suggest you focus not on the diagnosis but core and surface content to build insight and awareness and then identify adaptive strategies. Don't get caught up in the diagnosis, it's the symptoms and issues that really matter and will help you overcome this. I wish you well.
Thank you, really appreciate the advice!
my mom had the externalizing form of bpd. i used to think she was a narcissist because there was so much overlap, and my dad was a covert communal narc, my stepmom being a malignant communal narc.
Can you do a video for people who been hurt by the adverse behaviors of borderlines. My borderline friend always shuts me out. And goes no communication for months at a time. I’m bipolar and not without my issues. However, I don’t go to those unexplainable extremes.
I am a very flirtatious petulant borderline that sometimes thinks about killing herself...Mostly petulant I guess. "I am borderline" is one of my most used phrases.
I am all of the above BPD!
Tank you for all the vids, could you make one on Histronic/Narcistic/BPD Impulsive differences or comparison?
Dr fox,may you do a video solely about petulant type
Sure. Thanks
I’m quite and self destructive type
Same
I brought this book and the exercises in there were helpful
I am happy that it is helping you.
It's wearing My brain down as well..I feel it's making Me dumber..very scary..I see no way out at all ...why would God do this to Me?
SCAN IMAL I think that too all the Time
God did not do this to you, hon. Human beings are sinful and imperfect as a result of Adam and Eve's disobedience. Did you know the bible speaks about God's desire to restore life to the way it was? Perfect humans living in paradise.
Barb DeSouza 🙄🙄
I quit my job yesterday. Ugh...
Thanks for demonstrating the pouting face
No problem
I love you doc 🌸
Your voice is very soothing.
I just watched a video on petulant. I don't think I'm that all...and yet I thought that's what I am. It is really confusing.
Hey Dr.Fox thank you so much for your videos.. does every borderline personality have no empathy, because I am confused about my girl, she cannot resist his desire even though he must sacrifice his family's feelings.
Everyone is different, and degrees of empathy vary as well.
Dr. Daniel Fox
My daughter is rather difficult to take routine therapy from a doctor, including dealictical therapy because if her mood is not good she will reject everything. on the last last meeting I said to Dokt what about the religious approach, because in the religion of Muslims, teaching about patience, sincerity, surrender to the provisions of Allah, restrain lust. That is the main main service ... and the doctor said, if that value can be implanted ... that is the medicine for BPD
I wish someone would help me
Others can support your struggles and be an ear to your expression, this is very helpful. Continue to learn about this disorder from as many resources as possible. Apply what you've learned to your daily thoughts and behaviors and specific situations that call for your mindfulness. Awareness, mindfulness, action, selfcompassion and patience are tools you need to help yourself. It honestly comes down to your initiation and determination. This might sound disheartening but in fact, it's empowering. You have the power to help yourself, even if you don't think you do. It just takes time and practice. Keep moving forward and it'll lessen up. Take care
@@rozepyracantha5574 thank u so much for that :) it just so happened that I feel like I need help from a doctor because I'm undiagnosed and that's what's making it a little difficult, the uncertainty. if only I had the money for it. all the best to u and keep inspiring people with ur words :)
@@victorytothepeople3426 thank u so much ^_^
The thing is with impulsive bpds or people who resonate with that subtype more , I think some male and females would be looked at as a narcissist because on the outside it could appear that they have narcissist tendencies until you see the core problem and understand it . Could you do a video on that ?
Check out my other videos on NPD. I think they’ll help. Be well
I am not getting better w/age,My BPD keeps getting worse w/age and it's wearing Me down to the point I cannot fight it anymore...I also keep sinking into newer darker lows..I'm in a hole so deep suicide seems like the only way?
Do you have someone you feel close to and are confident with? Perhaps is there a therapist or someone you can talk to? It is hard, the fact that we don't know what tomorrow will be is oppressive, yet there are some little things you may enjoy in life, even the smallest ones: having a shower, eating something special, having a walk in a parc, listening to music, reading a book, watching a serie you enjoy or an old movie you like... Try to keep it simple, and don't hesitate to share to close people you trust and who really care for you. I am sure there are some :) Take good care of you.
@@LaGrossePaulik none of that helps-I have a therapist,12 step group some friends...but am unable to have a girlfriend/partner because My state of mind and bland dull empty personality is so unappealing..no matter what I do the endless grinding loneliness/empty dead feeling is weaing Me down...don't have the fight in Me anymire and feel Im meant to kill myself or was never meant to be here in the 1st place..feel so unwanted and unlovable
Omg I also avoid relationships because I feel boring in comparison to other ppl my age and I hate myself for being the doormat/nice girl...and being overly sensitive
This is a very dark place to be. I don't have an answer, but I hear you, and I hope you have a moment of clarity at some point that helps you understand how to shift your perspective.
So your saying we have all 4 of thes all day long or something what if your all of them
🙏🏻
It took two long years of you tube research, but I finally figured how to deal with my classic narcissist mother in a relatively stress-free, healthy way. Now I've figured out three of my close friends definitely fit somewhere on the BPD spectrum. One of them refuses to talk to me for the last six months after I tried to gently let her know that:
-her anger towards me was completely unfounded-she thought I was planning on not speaking to her, after a delay of merely hours in coming to her house!
-her name calling, false accusations, and threats in her anger fit were abusive and she needs to apologise.
It's hard to believe I never recognized this as dysfunctional and abusive in 25 years with her, for that I sincerely thank you Dr. Fox. The question is where do I go from here? Can you suggest some sources to help in dealing with those who appear to have "classic BPD?"
She has a very traditional therapist who "does not believe" in most personality disorder diagnosis's, so she refuses to look at any information...Thank you...
Oh I’m self-destructive bpd.. oof 😅
Insight is a powerful thing. Use it to learn about yourself and to build adaptive strategies to help yourself. Be well.
In your workbook I did the subtypes and I had 12 13 13 12, is this okay that I fluctuate between these subtypes so rapidly
It’s not a fluctuation but it shows traits of all of them. It’s not good or bad, it’s knowledge to gain insight.
oh ok so im more self-destructive and impulsive
Knowledge is power
What's difference between narcisstic personality disorder and borderline ? Do exist normal human being on this world😨
That brick wall is a terrible backdrop. It suggests death itself.
I’m sorry you feel that way I think everybody tends to interpret a video in their own way. I wish you all the best and hope that you were still able to find some value in the video.
Loooong intro on short vid...ugh
I’m more of the impulsive. I have bpd with narcissist traits and antisocial traits. Kinda fucked up lol. Just yesterday I was driving crazy because i was bored. My psychologist tried to tell me before that she had a couple of clients who died doing reckless stuff. But I don’t understand why she’s telling me that because it doesn’t bother me. I’m not them.
Thank you for this info.