They don't really know how to be 'friends' as it is difficult for them to 'adjust' their view of you if they once saw you romantically. They will always have resentment towards you.
They broke up with you but want to be friends means they haven't locked down the "new supply" and in case it doesn't work out at least they still got you. Don't be an option to someone that didn't make you a priority.
AINT NOTHING NORMAL ABOUT THIS CRAZINESS!!! Of course they want to minimize because they are trying to act as if nothing happened. They want to keep the good guy image.
The Narcissist "SENSE OF ENTITLEMENT". Is another factor. As well as knowing the Narcissist only sees us as property, objects that they don't want to lose.
My narc (now ex) husband started priming me PRIOR to the discard -- talking about people who knew who were divorced and still friends; And even some who had remarried and they were ALL friends -- yeah, one big happy family. Then, after the cruel, heartless, public and very embarrassing discard, he wanted to be friends. His behaviors both before and after the discard are absolutely narc textbook.
sorry you went through that ! Hope your healing being kind on yourself, having healthy boundaries and staying away from that type of toxic bullshit . We deserve healthy relationships with available supportive people!
No, he will not use me against another woman. I do not want to be friends with him. He did that to me with his "exes." I will not allow him to hurt anyone else the way I was hurt. I told him that when I left. I also said do not call or text.
My ex husband told me he wants us to be friends after breaking up and he doesn't want to leave my world..he is really sick. We have a daughter and business together so I had a hard time going no contact at first...But 3 weeks ago..I went no contact..finally!! My daughter and I are in a better place
Well said!!! We have to cut the trauma bond with our childhood so we don’t deal with these people. I just went thru this. He kept his ex in the loop and kept her on edge and me on edge. I’ve been saying I loved him, but he was no good for me. I see now I didn’t love him. I was just trauma bonded. He is disgusting. Ben, thank you! This shit has to stop!
He used triangulation by staying "friends" with his exgf. and her sons. He stated he needed to help her out because the Dads' were not in their lives. I treated it as a divorce so I said that it is ok ,but I needed to meet her. Never happened ! Future faked his way outa that. One day I heard him say I love you too over the phone....while I am sitting there. I said who was that ? Oh that's' Corrie..... I ended it ...... Hoovered thru email many times till I responded[ I know ) I am smarter now! Got back together only to note his cruel behaviour had escalated. I must say I think he is quite malignant with such coldness .... Again he started acting weird,wanted a talk but could never make a time, called him out stating either he talks today or I was going over to his house. Wow he was @ my house in 30 min..... probably he did not want me to see new supply. I told him very quietly that if he enjoys keeping his options open he can leave because I am not happy. I said get the ____ out now ! The look on his face was stunned....like no one had ever done this before. Fast forward 2 yrs I am still getting emails ( from different addresses)with regret and general apologies asking for restitution. Honestly I would like to believe he is changing...... but he has never admitted in detail once any of his transgressions..... Thanks Ben for Hoover tutorials! Be careful out there you all!
Same story, they don’t change but they love the chase and want to win. Hurt people hurt people! Unless he’s gotten intense psycho therapy (ask for receipts) stay no contact! It’s a spiritual warfare know that!
Being "friends" was one of the worst decisions. I asked him how we would be friends post relationship if he didnt embody any of the friendship qualities one would expect during a relationship. I let him stay in my orb..he pressured me constantly to have sex but I never said yes, thankfully. Yet at the end he sucked me back in emotionally saying we would work on the things we talked about doing (future fake) then casually told me he had someone else and would call the police if I contacted him again. Smh
My ex narcassist physically assaulted me and then a week after the abuse, she asked to be friends and I said no way. It's been a month since I went no contact with her.
My narc partner expected us to be friends and still be roommates after he brought his new gf home and I met her in the hall wearing only my underwear while my HUSBAND was cooking her breakfast. He didn’t realise why I didn’t want her around and him out of my flat for good.
Wife Of 6 years. I've never had somebody do so many nice seemingly good hearted favors, but then do and say such horrible things. The subtle passive aggressive tactics can become quite tortuous over time. Imagine that your wife that you adore slowly and eventually becomes like an enemy that you must now defend against and has turned several friends and neighbors against you. She began to get shady and do a lot of very dishonorable low blow tactics. I didn't trust her at this point but I knew the current situation wasn't going to go anywhere either. She convinced me it would be a good idea to move to a city across the country. We were in a low population area with no opportunity. She told me her mental health was slipping where we were. She told me she would commit harm to herself if she had to stay living where we were. I agreed, with hope of a good outcome on the other side, meanwhile not trusting her, feeling like she might try to leave me stranded but when you're a good person trying to trust and help your wife, you don't think somebody would actually do that..... We got here, signed a lease, then within a month, she was acting way different trying to make me leave and kick me out of my own family. Her long lasting web of lies and manipulation tactics fell apart. We have two kids together. She ended up sneaking around with another guy, and told me about it with a sadistic smile on her face when I called her out about it. She didn't get to enjoy it though. I laughed right in her face for being so dishonorable. Being blinded by love for the "enemy" is a dangerous position to be in. But long story short, I was conned into moving, then I was immediately discarded after she got what she wanted. We currently still live together but I never know what she is up to. If I didn't research covert narcissism, I would have ended up sinking into a bad place. She destroyed the marriage, and broke up the family of her own volition in a very dark sadistic way, and now wants to be friends like nothing happened....
I played the hell out of being “friends” until the divorce was final and then blocked him immediately. He had sex with a friend and got my computer password to try to get my attention. Nope. What the hell. So glad I know how to deal with this.
Wow this explains a lot! 20 years ago I had no idea I was being used to triangulate with his ex. She was married yet emailed him all the time and he would show the emails to me. I thought, wow this is weird. I voiced my opinion but even after marriage I found emails they were exchanging. He told me they were just friends (something I did not buy into). Now that I know what I married into all the "things" that went on in the past are making sense to me now. Thanks Ben!
I’m actually the new supply but since I didn’t understand about reactive abuse I’m the one who’s been made out to be the psycho. I get it now. Unfortunately the friends of the narc are being abused by listening to the narc when he goes into his story about how horrible I am and ungrateful because he took me in as I was made out to be homeless with mental health issues. I know the whole story and I now grey rock and stonewall in order to protect myself 👍
That's so spot on!!! They want the nice guy/girl image for whoever - suddenly they are father of the year...how to navigate this though without being accused of parenting alienation? I just don't believe in my case he's not bringing any substantial real value - he's using the kids in so many ways... I'm frustrated
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One guy just kept thinking I would forget about his past behavior because he became nicer. I used him as a stepping stone. People are nice or they are not. They are not nice to get sht from me.
You aren't "friends" with intimate partners, its much deeper. Don't trust a narc ever. They want to use you to triangulate new supply or try and get you back.
When I broke up w my narc, he said during breakup he wanted to still have sex. After I moved out he tapped my land line phone, character bashing of me was nonstop and stalked me for 4 years. No boundaries whatsoever.
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After 31years of abuse and cheating, and then divorcing me for (yet) another woman, this is 100persent what he is doing now...even down to 'visiting the dogs'!!! Thanks Ben, I read him like a cheap comic book now!
Yep this happened to me so many times with my narcissist and it confused me every time until I educated myself on the narcissist. Now when he tries to stay in touch i don’t respond anymore.
It was incredibly obvious what my ex was attempting to do when he came back to Hoover after a year of No Contact. He had been spying on me for that entire year almost weekly- with his Flying Monkeys and current "Supplies" checking my Social Media account all the time. He'd send his Flying Monkeys out to attempt to hit on me, HOPING one of them would be able to snag me, so he could get info. on what I've been up to. It didn't work whatsoever- but only CONFIRMED to me 100% that he truly is a Narcissist. When my ex returned to Hoover- he said, "I'm sorry I hurt you." Which, was crap. He wasn't sorry at all- because he didn't SPECIFY anything he did throughout our relationship that was abusive; like the Silent Treatment, gaslighting, triangulation with other women, etc. He did this on purpose- because he doesn't want to have to ADMIT to himself, myself, and ALL of his Flying Monkeys all of the abusive things he's done in writing. He said, "I cant give you what you want- but we can be friends?" Firstly- I never ASKED him during this Hoover to date any longer. He just ASSUMED I was still Trauma Bonded, and still desired to be with him. He was hoping I would beg and cry for him to keep dating. I wasn't the same girl any longer whatsoever. I had healed from the Trauma Bond, and he had NO power over me any longer. He said, "lets just take things slow." I knew at this point- he had another girl he was dating. I wasn't going to LET him USE me to triangulate with her. I thought I would give him a taste of his own medicine. I said, "sure, let's take things slow." I called him a Snake immediately after that and blocked him. He attempted to get one of his Flying Monkeys to talk to me immediately after- but I just deleted my Social Media completely. Always trust your intuition- and NEVER let a Narcissist back into your life once you truly know what they are. Their ONLY reason for reaching out to you again- is to attempt to punish YOU for leaving them- AND to triangulate you with their new girl/guy they are dating.
This was eye opening. I got lured into my confusing narc relationship and he was still dealing with his “soon to be ex wife” which actually took 3 years for him to divorce because she “needed his help”. It definitely kept me on edge and wondering where I stood. It was all so abusive! Thank you.
My second narc tried to be friends but I was so so very hurt and my heart was absolutely broken. I didn’t want to. We met at work so I was going to keep working close to him one way or another. Then he said: “you didn’t want us to be friends, then let me do my thing” which was starting a full smear campaign against me (until today, even tho it was 15 years ago and I stopped working over there in 2020; now he has more enemies at work than friends, -his friends are at the top of the organization so he doesn’t care as long as they believe his fake persona, they’re not very bright too, most of them are narcissists themselves also), the thing is he goes around followed by a full staff of flying monkeys-err, his “minor friends” (new people at work) and he wanted me to be a part of them, I felt horribly hurt in my pride because he erased our pics together, etc. and I didn’t want to be humiliated like that following him everywhere around as the rest of them do. He of course went for the daughter of one of the bosses who got pregnant from another guy and she clung onto him, he was his chance of not being a “single mom”… and he was proudly showing off how “he saved her” and immediately her family accepted him no questions asked… he’s left her since but he still proclaims the baby is “his”… he’s been with at least 3 more people since and every time my ex colleagues dare to mention me he has tons to say about my “mediocre persona” just because I didn’t want to be part of his flying monkeys forever. I really DO think he’s never coming back precisely because of that tho.
why would you want to be friends with them, no way after their behaviour, Sod their image however you don't want them to think you are not doing okay, let them know you are fine and thanks for the great lesson you learnt. Leave it there. giving posistive relieves their guilt i know but letting them think you are suffering is control for them. damned if you do damned if youdon't, difficult but just don't engage .
I needed this video. The best part is when Ben responds with “let’s see how fine it is in 6 months” 5:29. 😂😂😂 I know from experience that it isn’t and it gets worse
Discarded and I blocked him and walked away. Then 2 weeks later he contacted me on a different method (WhatsApp) asking “to hang out as friends” under the guise of “checking I’m ok”. Then he’s off on a big sex holiday in Thailand and messages me from overseas asking “do you want to fuck?” Like seriously WTF
They unfriended me on social media, text me to let me know and said "not because I don't want to be friends..." Then got mad when I said to be let things cool off before I determine if it's ok to continue to hang out with my kid (my kid is not their bio kid)
The narc i am dealing with is using triangulation and badmouthing of a new partner to people in the circle is our problems Constantly over the ex in laws "for the kids" then trying to turn the parents against the new partner
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My narcissistic ex gf broke up with me but wants to stay friends and cool with each other. Then she wants to tell me about her new supply, like doing that is cool.
I work with my ex narcissist. I try no contact but she won’t leave me alone at work. Now she got new supply at work and still trying to keep me on the hook. Ughhh!
I blocked him on everything 3 months later he texted about some items he had of mine unfortunately I wasn’t strong enough to resist sadly we are back at this
Yes this time he text me we are best friends right but we are not a couple I said what yes we are a couple you just told me when I got back there as I was out of state that our relationship was going to be amazing and he was going to treat me like his queen then this 💔
That’s what happened to me. I told her i didn’t want to be friends and she blocked me me saying that it is too difficult for her not to get in contact with me
Prepare for the unstoppable smear campaign and their blatant rudeness and disregard for you, each time you run into them they’ll try to humiliate you even further.
POWERFUL VIDEO! I was slipping back into the fantasy that my ex created for me with his future faking, and almost wrote a 'goodbye' letter. But your message slapped me back into reality, and I realise the trauma bond hasn't ceased yet. Thank you!
![Lp. Сердце Вселенной #30 ДВА В ОДНОМ [Один человек]• Майнкрафт](http://i.ytimg.com/vi/nrXy15orKhY/mqdefault.jpg)
My narc was NOT happy when i said no to friendship. Threw a tantrum and i blocked him. Celebrating one year of no contact! Im so proud of myself ❤
Congratulations 😊
“I’m friends with all my exs” RED FLAG 🚩🚩🚩🚩🚩🚩🚩🏴☠️
Exactly. Another huge Red Flag- is when they DON'T speak about their past relationships as well.
They don't really know how to be 'friends' as it is difficult for them to 'adjust' their view of you if they once saw you romantically. They will always have resentment towards you.
They broke up with you but want to be friends means they haven't locked down the "new supply" and in case it doesn't work out at least they still got you. Don't be an option to someone that didn't make you a priority.
AINT NOTHING NORMAL ABOUT THIS CRAZINESS!!! Of course they want to minimize because they are trying to act as if nothing happened. They want to keep the good guy image.
The Narcissist "SENSE OF ENTITLEMENT".
Is another factor. As well as knowing the Narcissist only sees us as property, objects that they don't want to lose.
Exactly. Let's be friends. We just grew apart. We're still soul mates. B.S.
My narc (now ex) husband started priming me PRIOR to the discard -- talking about people who knew who were divorced and still friends; And even some who had remarried and they were ALL friends -- yeah, one big happy family. Then, after the cruel, heartless, public and very embarrassing discard, he wanted to be friends. His behaviors both before and after the discard are absolutely narc textbook.
sorry you went through that ! Hope your healing being kind on yourself, having healthy boundaries and staying away from that type of toxic bullshit . We deserve healthy relationships with available supportive people!
exactly the same here! I feel you. Almost 1.5 years apart and still having nightmares almost every night. Stayin‘ strong!
Triangulation is such an effective thing they use..also gaslighting!
No, he will not use me against another woman. I do not want to be friends with him. He did that to me with his "exes." I will not allow him to hurt anyone else the way I was hurt. I told him that when I left. I also said do not call or text.
Good for you.. 👏
Me too.
They don’t want to be friends. Especially if they know you know. They will run if they know you know their secrets.
He threw me away and still wanted to be friends while having numerous supplies
He wants you on the shelf as a supply. Your worth is same as toaster :)
Block them
@NMTDeligsp are the rest of the toys on shelf..htfulMusic
They ALWAYS do.
My ex husband told me he wants us to be friends after breaking up and he doesn't want to leave my world..he is really sick. We have a daughter and business together so I had a hard time going no contact at first...But 3 weeks ago..I went no contact..finally!! My daughter and I are in a better place
Listen to Sam Vaknin - Shared Fantasy
stay the course dear..been there with kids..they don't change
god bless you
They are all the same. Sick.
Well said!!! We have to cut the trauma bond with our childhood so we don’t deal with these people.
I just went thru this. He kept his ex in the loop and kept her on edge and me on edge.
I’ve been saying I loved him, but he was no good for me. I see now I didn’t love him. I was just trauma bonded. He is disgusting.
Ben, thank you! This shit has to stop!
He used triangulation by staying "friends" with his exgf. and her sons. He stated he needed to help her out because the Dads' were not in their lives. I treated it as a divorce so I said that it is ok ,but I needed to meet her.
Never happened ! Future faked his way outa that.
One day I heard him say I love you too over the phone....while I am sitting there.
I said who was that ?
Oh that's' Corrie.....
I ended it ......
Hoovered thru email many times till I responded[ I know ) I am smarter now!
Got back together only to note his cruel behaviour had escalated. I must say I think he is quite malignant with such coldness ....
Again he started acting weird,wanted a talk but could never make a time, called him out stating either he talks today or I was going over to his house. Wow he was @ my house in 30 min..... probably he did not want me to see new supply. I told him very quietly that if he enjoys keeping his options open he can leave because I am not happy.
I said get the ____ out now ! The look on his face was stunned....like no one had ever done this before.
Fast forward 2 yrs I am still getting emails ( from different addresses)with regret and general apologies asking for restitution.
Honestly I would like to believe he is changing...... but he has never admitted in detail once any of his transgressions.....
Thanks Ben for Hoover tutorials!
Be careful out there you all!
Same story, they don’t change but they love the chase and want to win. Hurt people hurt people! Unless he’s gotten intense psycho therapy (ask for receipts) stay no contact! It’s a spiritual warfare know that!
He is the one you saw without the mask. Don't be fooled. They are actors.
Yup the triangulation thing happened to me with his ex he called his best friend. I walked away. 💪🏾
Within 30 seconds of him discarding me for the new supply he was secretly sneaking around with, I had him BLOCKED and NO CONTACT for LIFE.
my ex was flaunting her new supply in my face to get a reaction out of me,,,i did my best not to show emotion but on the inside i was dying
Being "friends" was one of the worst decisions. I asked him how we would be friends post relationship if he didnt embody any of the friendship qualities one would expect during a relationship. I let him stay in my orb..he pressured me constantly to have sex but I never said yes, thankfully. Yet at the end he sucked me back in emotionally saying we would work on the things we talked about doing (future fake) then casually told me he had someone else and would call the police if I contacted him again. Smh
They’re demons, be glad God took him far away from you.
They’re demons, be glad God took him far away from you.
My ex narcassist physically assaulted me and then a week after the abuse, she asked to be friends and I said no way. It's been a month since I went no contact with her.
My narc partner expected us to be friends and still be roommates after he brought his new gf home and I met her in the hall wearing only my underwear while my HUSBAND was cooking her breakfast. He didn’t realise why I didn’t want her around and him out of my flat for good.
not the sharpest knife in the drawer is he?
He knows. It's his sense of entitlement .
Wife Of 6 years. I've never had somebody do so many nice seemingly good hearted favors, but then do and say such horrible things. The subtle passive aggressive tactics can become quite tortuous over time. Imagine that your wife that you adore slowly and eventually becomes like an enemy that you must now defend against and has turned several friends and neighbors against you. She began to get shady and do a lot of very dishonorable low blow tactics. I didn't trust her at this point but I knew the current situation wasn't going to go anywhere either. She convinced me it would be a good idea to move to a city across the country. We were in a low population area with no opportunity. She told me her mental health was slipping where we were. She told me she would commit harm to herself if she had to stay living where we were. I agreed, with hope of a good outcome on the other side, meanwhile not trusting her, feeling like she might try to leave me stranded but when you're a good person trying to trust and help your wife, you don't think somebody would actually do that..... We got here, signed a lease, then within a month, she was acting way different trying to make me leave and kick me out of my own family. Her long lasting web of lies and manipulation tactics fell apart. We have two kids together. She ended up sneaking around with another guy, and told me about it with a sadistic smile on her face when I called her out about it. She didn't get to enjoy it though. I laughed right in her face for being so dishonorable. Being blinded by love for the "enemy" is a dangerous position to be in. But long story short, I was conned into moving, then I was immediately discarded after she got what she wanted. We currently still live together but I never know what she is up to. If I didn't research covert narcissism, I would have ended up sinking into a bad place. She destroyed the marriage, and broke up the family of her own volition in a very dark sadistic way, and now wants to be friends like nothing happened....
I played the hell out of being “friends” until the divorce was final and then blocked him immediately.
He had sex with a friend and got my computer password to try to get my attention.
Nope.
What the hell.
So glad I know how to deal with this.
Wow this explains a lot! 20 years ago I had no idea I was being used to triangulate with his ex. She was married yet emailed him all the time and he would show the emails to me. I thought, wow this is weird. I voiced my opinion but even after marriage I found emails they were exchanging. He told me they were just friends (something I did not buy into). Now that I know what I married into all the "things" that went on in the past are making sense to me now. Thanks Ben!
I’m actually the new supply but since I didn’t understand about reactive abuse I’m the one who’s been made out to be the psycho. I get it now. Unfortunately the friends of the narc are being abused by listening to the narc when he goes into his story about how horrible I am and ungrateful because he took me in as I was made out to be homeless with mental health issues. I know the whole story and I now grey rock and stonewall in order to protect myself 👍
That's so spot on!!! They want the nice guy/girl image for whoever - suddenly they are father of the year...how to navigate this though without being accused of parenting alienation? I just don't believe in my case he's not bringing any substantial real value - he's using the kids in so many ways... I'm frustrated
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"Nah, I'm good- I need friends like I need fuckin' holes in my head."
they were sh*tty partners why would they make a good friend
One guy just kept thinking I would forget about his past behavior because he became nicer. I used him as a stepping stone. People are nice or they are not. They are not nice to get sht from me.
They should have NO WAY TO CONTACT a you in the first place, call my lawyer if you want to talk to me
You aren't "friends" with intimate partners, its much deeper. Don't trust a narc ever. They want to use you to triangulate new supply or try and get you back.
When I broke up w my narc, he said during breakup he wanted to still have sex. After I moved out he tapped my land line phone, character bashing of me was nonstop and stalked me for 4 years. No boundaries whatsoever.
💯 true! I prefer to be toxic free so I’m holding my boundaries and staying no contact. All 3 reasons you gave are on point Ben.
The friendship stuff is just their attempt to restart you in the abuse cycle at some point sooner or later.
We're here to support your healing journey. Come join us in this free masterclass to learn about the secret methods on breaking free from the toxic, break the bond and empower yourself once more. Just head over to www.rawmotivations.com/masterclass.
More like let's be friends with benefits. As if
They just want the benefits. They can't be in a relationship let alone be a friend!
Benefits for themselves
After 31years of abuse and cheating, and then divorcing me for (yet) another woman, this is 100persent what he is doing now...even down to 'visiting the dogs'!!! Thanks Ben, I read him like a cheap comic book now!
its insane
exactly exactly what he said to me!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!
No apology, for his toxic behavior
Not any friendship!!!
exactly. why would you want to be friends with someone like that
Yep this happened to me so many times with my narcissist and it confused me every time until I educated myself on the narcissist. Now when he tries to stay in touch i don’t respond anymore.
It was incredibly obvious what my ex was attempting to do when he came back to Hoover after a year of No Contact.
He had been spying on me for that entire year almost weekly- with his Flying Monkeys and current "Supplies" checking my Social Media account all the time.
He'd send his Flying Monkeys out to attempt to hit on me, HOPING one of them would be able to snag me, so he could get info. on what I've been up to.
It didn't work whatsoever- but only CONFIRMED to me 100% that he truly is a Narcissist.
When my ex returned to Hoover- he said, "I'm sorry I hurt you."
Which, was crap. He wasn't sorry at all- because he didn't SPECIFY anything he did throughout our relationship that was abusive; like the Silent Treatment, gaslighting, triangulation with other women, etc.
He did this on purpose- because he doesn't want to have to ADMIT to himself, myself, and ALL of his Flying Monkeys all of the abusive things he's done in writing.
He said, "I cant give you what you want- but we can be friends?"
Firstly- I never ASKED him during this Hoover to date any longer. He just ASSUMED I was still Trauma Bonded, and still desired to be with him.
He was hoping I would beg and cry for him to keep dating.
I wasn't the same girl any longer whatsoever. I had healed from the Trauma Bond, and he had NO power over me any longer.
He said, "lets just take things slow."
I knew at this point- he had another girl he was dating. I wasn't going to LET him USE me to triangulate with her.
I thought I would give him a taste of his own medicine. I said, "sure, let's take things slow."
I called him a Snake immediately after that and blocked him. He attempted to get one of his Flying Monkeys to talk to me immediately after- but I just deleted my Social Media completely.
Always trust your intuition- and NEVER let a Narcissist back into your life once you truly know what they are.
Their ONLY reason for reaching out to you again- is to attempt to punish YOU for leaving them- AND to triangulate you with their new girl/guy they are dating.
This was eye opening. I got lured into my confusing narc relationship and he was still dealing with his “soon to be ex wife” which actually took 3 years for him to divorce because she “needed his help”. It definitely kept me on edge and wondering where I stood. It was all so abusive! Thank you.
Thanks for sharing, that must have been a tough spot to be in, you are strong for being able to learn and heal from that! You deserve love
My second narc tried to be friends but I was so so very hurt and my heart was absolutely broken. I didn’t want to. We met at work so I was going to keep working close to him one way or another. Then he said: “you didn’t want us to be friends, then let me do my thing” which was starting a full smear campaign against me (until today, even tho it was 15 years ago and I stopped working over there in 2020; now he has more enemies at work than friends, -his friends are at the top of the organization so he doesn’t care as long as they believe his fake persona, they’re not very bright too, most of them are narcissists themselves also), the thing is he goes around followed by a full staff of flying monkeys-err, his “minor friends” (new people at work) and he wanted me to be a part of them, I felt horribly hurt in my pride because he erased our pics together, etc. and I didn’t want to be humiliated like that following him everywhere around as the rest of them do. He of course went for the daughter of one of the bosses who got pregnant from another guy and she clung onto him, he was his chance of not being a “single mom”… and he was proudly showing off how “he saved her” and immediately her family accepted him no questions asked… he’s left her since but he still proclaims the baby is “his”… he’s been with at least 3 more people since and every time my ex colleagues dare to mention me he has tons to say about my “mediocre persona” just because I didn’t want to be part of his flying monkeys forever. I really DO think he’s never coming back precisely because of that tho.
why would you want to be friends with them, no way after their behaviour, Sod their image however you don't want them to think you are not doing okay, let them know you are fine and thanks for the great lesson you learnt. Leave it there. giving posistive relieves their guilt i know but letting them think you are suffering is control for them. damned if you do damned if youdon't, difficult but just don't engage .
Good word Ben 👏. So true
Needed this today. Thank you❤ great info and advice as always
Glad it was helpful!
I needed this video. The best part is when Ben responds with “let’s see how fine it is in 6 months” 5:29. 😂😂😂 I know from experience that it isn’t and it gets worse
Hope you are better these days!
Discarded and I blocked him and walked away. Then 2 weeks later he contacted me on a different method (WhatsApp) asking “to hang out as friends” under the guise of “checking I’m ok”. Then he’s off on a big sex holiday in Thailand and messages me from overseas asking “do you want to fuck?” Like seriously WTF
They unfriended me on social media, text me to let me know and said "not because I don't want to be friends..." Then got mad when I said to be let things cool off before I determine if it's ok to continue to hang out with my kid (my kid is not their bio kid)
I missed the live 😮 I had the notification on, omg
stay tune today at 3 or at 8:15 eastern , :D
The narc i am dealing with is using triangulation and badmouthing of a new partner to people in the circle is our problems
Constantly over the ex in laws "for the kids" then trying to turn the parents against the new partner
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So true so true I don t want to be freinds no I stopped I don t want after 2 years he pretend to much
My narcissistic ex gf broke up with me but wants to stay friends and cool with each other. Then she wants to tell me about her new supply, like doing that is cool.
thank u
i needed this
I work with my ex narcissist. I try no contact but she won’t leave me alone at work. Now she got new supply at work and still trying to keep me on the hook. Ughhh!
Thanks!
Keep up the great work 🤗 ⭐
This explains so much. Thank you for sharing. X
Glad it was helpful!
I blocked him on everything 3 months later he texted about some items he had of mine unfortunately I wasn’t strong enough to resist sadly we are back at this
Another reason for a narc to make contact , hope this video helps ua-cam.com/video/-H9jxBQQ9tA/v-deo.html
Cheating they are liers and to use you
i wish i would have seen this 20 years ago
Awesome thanks
Thankyou alot very helpful
I hate him onest after all this he make never I need to build my life
Yes this time he text me we are best friends right but we are not a couple I said what yes we are a couple you just told me when I got back there as I was out of state that our relationship was going to be amazing and he was going to treat me like his queen then this 💔
All the time on Facebook he pretend that is something
What would the narcissist think or do after they discard you and offer a friendship, but you refuse to be friends with them?
They pout and pretend your the problem. Tell everyone they tried and you said no and blah blah blah their a poor victim.
@@Dansyoung 100%
That’s what happened to me. I told her i didn’t want to be friends and she blocked me me saying that it is too difficult for her not to get in contact with me
Prepare for the unstoppable smear campaign and their blatant rudeness and disregard for you, each time you run into them they’ll try to humiliate you even further.
No
No crying I need to move on very big lier
🙏🙏🙏🙏🙏🙏🙏🙏🙏🙏🙏🙏
Can you help me pls what I have to do ??? Pls I need help
Would love to help you on your healing journey. If I can be of help feel free to grab a time here at rawmotivations.com/one-on-ones
it's hard to figure out this live chat thing.
Oh im sorry i did not see this message earlier, live chat is available on the first 30 minutes :)
👌
POWERFUL VIDEO! I was slipping back into the fantasy that my ex created for me with his future faking, and almost wrote a 'goodbye' letter. But your message slapped me back into reality, and I realise the trauma bond hasn't ceased yet. Thank you!
Funny he switched me to friend zone, and I didn’t even knew that 😂 I’m very patient person that did me bad favour
Same thing happened to me:/ smh
Same
Same thing happened to me…
Yep I was put in friend zone……with benefits….until I knew better and then I friend zoned him and told him I didn’t fancy him or love him anymore.
Thanks!