If Republicans Said the Quiet Parts Loud About the Bible

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  • Опубліковано 14 кві 2024
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    #politicalcomedy #skit #sketchcomedy
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КОМЕНТАРІ • 846

  • @LeftyConspirator
    @LeftyConspirator 21 день тому +491

    If you carry this on much longer, you risk actually getting elected.

    • @jonberle3395
      @jonberle3395 20 днів тому +17

      LOL 😂😂😂 that is so true!

    • @piccalillipit9211
      @piccalillipit9211 19 днів тому +6

      AHHAHHHHHAAHHA yes

    • @sndchamp9949
      @sndchamp9949 18 днів тому +7

      One more vid he’ll be voted in as a Tennessee representative

    • @justaguy6100
      @justaguy6100 18 днів тому +5

      As immune to irony as the modern RW voter is today, he's a sure bet.

    • @caseycooper5615
      @caseycooper5615 18 днів тому +3

      Steve even got all the parts af making great speeches. Start quiet, then work of to a crescendo, then suddenly get quiet and solemn. Work of a crescendo, followed a quick quiet part, then end with a semi-crescendo. I almost forgot he said the quiet (true) parts. This is the blackest of humor and I loved it

  • @Blakblooded
    @Blakblooded 23 дні тому +664

    The ultimate irony is if a Republican actually gave this speech they would get a standing ovation and the crowd would start chanting "We're good! We're right!"

    • @jordansean18
      @jordansean18 23 дні тому +34

      *cue the music from the season finale of The Boys*

    • @seeleunit2000
      @seeleunit2000 23 дні тому +19

      Yeah, pretty much

    • @StormsparkPegasus
      @StormsparkPegasus 22 дні тому +35

      Yeah, this was a little too on the nose. They would take this literally and completely unironically as support.

    • @NovaSaber
      @NovaSaber 22 дні тому

      Only if it was Trump. (Who's honestly the main one I can think of who really thinks this way anyway. MOST of the pandering-to-the-religious conservatives are genuinely religious extremists. Mike Johnson, for example, is a creationist associated with Ken Ham.)

    • @timothylopez8572
      @timothylopez8572 22 дні тому

      An infallible being is a god. Who paints himself GOLD not orange. The personification of every deadly sin. Created unholy consecrated ground by burying his ex wife, who he assaulted, cheated on with a adult actress, on his golf resort for tax benefits. AKA the actual Antichrist.
      Obvious LUCIFERIANS constantly call for the mass televised executions of ethnic and religious minorities, LGBTQ people and political opposition, specifically to condemn them to hell, is quite literally just sacrificing people to the devil. Christ teaches salvation, not damnation.

  • @benjbk
    @benjbk 23 дні тому +252

    My favorite part of the bible is the bit where Jesus makes fun of the people who show off their religiosity in public to get a special place in society.

    • @seanlahm4826
      @seanlahm4826 20 днів тому +33

      Matthew 6. But they never seem to like that part of the Bible. Or have never read it in the first place.

    • @victornieves1794
      @victornieves1794 19 днів тому +16

      @@seanlahm4826They only read and memorize the parts that reinforce their beliefs, the beliefs of their sheep followers, justify their wrongdoings, and verses they can use to manipulate ignorant people.

    • @misspatvandriverlady7555
      @misspatvandriverlady7555 19 днів тому +11

      I like the bits where Peter is making an absolute @$$ of himself but still gets to be the first Pope! 😅

    • @douglascutler1037
      @douglascutler1037 18 днів тому +1

      I'm still partial to the talking donkey but yeah, your fav is top drawer irony, for sure.

    • @ameliaannhouck2670
      @ameliaannhouck2670 18 днів тому +1

      JESUS LAUGHED !

  • @kpk1958
    @kpk1958 23 дні тому +314

    What were the "quite" parts? This sounded too much like a typical MAGA republican speech.

    • @outermarker5801
      @outermarker5801 20 днів тому +25

      The quiet parts is the politician telling them what he really thinks..of _them._

    • @Meow_Zedong
      @Meow_Zedong 19 днів тому

      He's talking about the Republicans that still try to convince people they are not secretly demons wearing skin suits. It's the Republicans that rub elbows with Joe Biden, Nancy Pelosi, and Chuck Schumer.

    • @repelsteeltje90
      @repelsteeltje90 19 днів тому +5

      ​@@outermarker5801have you heard of a thing called irony?

    • @user-cp5eu5gb5w
      @user-cp5eu5gb5w 19 днів тому +1

      Can't say raca. Not in the budget

    • @chaosopher23
      @chaosopher23 18 днів тому

      Sometimes this can be heard on shortwave radio.

  • @wiesejay
    @wiesejay 23 дні тому +308

    GOP 2008: Welcome, bigots!
    GOP 2016: How did nazis take over the party all of a sudden?

    • @BelRigh
      @BelRigh 22 дні тому +49

      Gop 2024: What Nazis? .... Those aren't Nazis....

    • @gogreen7794
      @gogreen7794 21 день тому

      The bigots were welcomed by Nixon and many in GOP leadership roles after the passage of the Civil Rights and Voting Rights Acts in the 1960s.

    • @RiesenWuschel
      @RiesenWuschel 20 днів тому +38

      @@BelRigh "And if they were, it wouldn't be a crime."

    • @1th_to_comment.
      @1th_to_comment. 20 днів тому +8

      ​@@BelRigh but they actually are

    • @josephcercy8117
      @josephcercy8117 20 днів тому +10

      GOP 1980! Remember the "Moral Majority"?

  • @firefly4f4
    @firefly4f4 23 дні тому +262

    Personally, I'd have gone with:
    Fraternal American Society of Christians for Implementing the Sovereign Testament

    • @MLBlue30
      @MLBlue30 22 дні тому +21

      I see what you did there.

    • @AndrewH1994
      @AndrewH1994 22 дні тому +18

      Hmmm I bet we could come up with a better way to say that. Maybe an acronym? Yeah, how about F.A.S.C.I.S.T. and it can be pronounced “fascist”

    • @firefly4f4
      @firefly4f4 22 дні тому +16

      In hindsight, it probably should have been "Savior's" instead of "Sovereign", but that's picking nits

    • @jackabug2475
      @jackabug2475 20 днів тому +3

      "Or, NAMBLA..."

    • @qwertyshblong
      @qwertyshblong 20 днів тому +5

      @@firefly4f4​​⁠​⁠id say the internet will end up naturally selecting the iteration that is most catchy, so my mutation id like to contribute is “*Free America’s* Society of Christians for Implementing the Savior’s Testament”

  • @OsirisMalkovich
    @OsirisMalkovich 23 дні тому +490

    This is 1/3 funny and 2/3 terrifying.

    • @BlackCover95
      @BlackCover95 23 дні тому +47

      Like good satire should.

    • @itcouldbelupus2842
      @itcouldbelupus2842 23 дні тому +37

      And 💯 percent accurate

    • @GSBarlev
      @GSBarlev 23 дні тому +36

      I watched this right after reading an analysis of what's going on in Arizona's Republican caucus right now, so to me this is more like 7/8 terrifying.

    • @dominicfucinari1942
      @dominicfucinari1942 23 дні тому

      @@GSBarlev I wonder if most of those extreme Charismatican types know that Pentecostalism only dates back to the year One Nine Zero Six. They don't seem aware that the idea of speaking in tongues doesn't even date back 2 centuries ago.

    • @StormsparkPegasus
      @StormsparkPegasus 22 дні тому +15

      Problem is Poe's Law. There are republicans that would take this literally and unironically as support.

  • @triksterx
    @triksterx 23 дні тому +272

    The way you fondled that Bible was unsettling. Good job.

    • @williamb9422
      @williamb9422 23 дні тому +7

      It was kind of sexy...

    • @williamb9422
      @williamb9422 23 дні тому +9

      Oh wait...I spoke too soon, it was totally creepy.

    • @CAP198462
      @CAP198462 23 дні тому +14

      But, did you notice it was right side up.

    • @michellejean11
      @michellejean11 23 дні тому +13

      trump does it, he understands the fanatics that vote for him even if he can't tell if the bible is upside down. Amen.

    • @MLBlue30
      @MLBlue30 22 дні тому

      If only modern Christians knew how much God hates them. Matt 7: 21-23.

  • @Kenobi-1221
    @Kenobi-1221 22 дні тому +136

    Spot on. As a Christian, it absolutely infuriates me how these people use a book that teaches the opposite of their beliefs to justify their bigotry. Even if you look at the provisions supposedly "condemning" gay people, there's a complete lack of understanding how to read context, language, etc. combined with horrible translation errors). Not to mention complete disregard for the fact that their own doctrine states Jesus abolished the Old Testament law.

    • @he_lost_get_over_it
      @he_lost_get_over_it 21 день тому +3

      Amen!

    • @willie728
      @willie728 20 днів тому +2

      💯💯💯💯💯💯

    • @luckymuddypaw
      @luckymuddypaw 20 днів тому +12

      Same! I have a nun in my family and she is active in local politics as a Democrat, and tries to get more people registered to vote. She has written letters to the local paper calling out other religions people for their bigotry. She is the reason my family stayed on the right path. It's not so much about party loyalty, it's about which candidate will do things for the country instead of just for their own benefit.

    • @mystablak
      @mystablak 20 днів тому +3

      What doctrine states that Jesus abolished Old Testament law?

    • @misspatvandriverlady7555
      @misspatvandriverlady7555 19 днів тому +8

      @@mystablakJesus Himself clearly stated that animal sacrifices and food purity, amongst other things, were no longer strictly necessary. If you read the Old Testament, you’ll see how absolutely critical to old Jewish law such practices were. In the Catholic Church, the general understanding is that we hold onto the Old Testament because it holds the prophecies that foretold the coming of the Christ, not because we are supposed to keep following the old Jewish laws contained therein.

  • @shnickityshnoo3574
    @shnickityshnoo3574 23 дні тому +111

    Listing the "female orgasm" as one of things that's no longer called a sin and then, much later, calling out that only their wives understand how you "biblically know the bible" - very well done.

  • @jaredboyd7997
    @jaredboyd7997 19 днів тому +27

    "Religion is regarded by the common people as true, the wise as false, and the rulers as useful." - Seneca

  • @RobMacKendrick
    @RobMacKendrick 19 днів тому +27

    The genius of this monologue is that it's written in the exact cadences that preachers and God-pimping politicians use in these situations. The up-welling patriotic oratory, the sudden hushed, reverent, even teary declarations of love and gratitude, then a shock-and-awe screaming rant about thunderous retribution, then back to coda and you do it all over.
    Seriously. Watch one of these guys in action. Steve has completely nailed it.

  • @seannyhan2254
    @seannyhan2254 23 дні тому +201

    Satire is dead. This is so on point it's not even a lampoon. Sweet Christmas!

    • @caligo7918
      @caligo7918 23 дні тому +24

      There is a point where reality becomes so surreal, you can't make satire of it anymore...

    • @StormsparkPegasus
      @StormsparkPegasus 22 дні тому +5

      @@caligo7918 Yep, we've hit that point.

    • @MLBlue30
      @MLBlue30 22 дні тому

      The very last thing he said in the video scared the shit out of me. Or maybe the way he said it. It was a cross between a sermon and a Hitler speech. Didn't think the Bible cound sound do... demonic.
      But that's Christian Nationalsm for you. Less about the love, more about the aggressive fascism.

    • @arkhamftw6186
      @arkhamftw6186 19 днів тому +4

      “Political satire became obsolete when Henry Kissinger was awarded the Nobel Peace Prize.”
      -Tom Lehrer

    • @evanpatterson7098
      @evanpatterson7098 16 днів тому +1

      Idiocracy was supposed to be "just a movie " as well.😂😂😢😢

  • @nerium.nerium
    @nerium.nerium 23 дні тому +122

    Religious bigotry is still bigotry.

    • @lijohnyoutube101
      @lijohnyoutube101 22 дні тому +9

      Yes in a way but bigotry on the other hand is to be against something that exists. Religion however is just ALL absolute gibberish it’s nothing but a mechanism for control.

    • @matthewgordon3281
      @matthewgordon3281 20 днів тому

      No one has to be tolerant of intolerance. Tolerance is a contract, all sides agree to treat each other with a certain amount of respect. The intolerant break, violate, and ignore that contract so they don't get to benefit from it. Want to be a bigot against LGBTQIA+, women, people of color, immigrants, etc? Ok, but that means you get no tolerance from the rest of us.

  • @Barnabas45
    @Barnabas45 23 дні тому +104

    I used to be a janitor for a Catholic school and this dude is spot on!

    • @Tolly7249
      @Tolly7249 23 дні тому +12

      I went to a Catholic school in the 90s and 2000s and yeah, very much this. And my school was actually pretty sane in the religious school stakes!

    • @nbenefiel
      @nbenefiel 21 день тому +2

      I went to Catholic schools from first grade through grad school. I was taught to think for myself.

    • @matthewgordon3281
      @matthewgordon3281 20 днів тому +4

      I went to Catholic School for Kindergarten to 12th grade. The passive bigotry kept me from feeling safe even admitting to myself that I was gay. I'm pushing 60 and still have to fight the self loathing they instilled in me.

  • @firefly4f4
    @firefly4f4 23 дні тому +281

    "Fraternal American Trust of Christians Outspoken for Certitude Knowledge and Sensibility"
    ISWYDT

    • @brianpaulbrundage
      @brianpaulbrundage 23 дні тому +16

      Thank you it's 5:30 in the morning and my brain couldn't figure it out

    • @aldenheterodyne2833
      @aldenheterodyne2833 23 дні тому +43

      F A T C O C K S
      For people like me who need it spelled out. 😅

    • @MrChupacabra555
      @MrChupacabra555 23 дні тому +18

      Thank you.
      Was trying to figure it out, then realized someone else had probably already done so 😂

    • @linkthehero8431
      @linkthehero8431 23 дні тому +4

      🤣🤣🤣🤣🤣🤣🤣🤣🤣

    • @austinluther5825
      @austinluther5825 23 дні тому +5

      That is brilliant. 😂

  • @ccf_1004
    @ccf_1004 23 дні тому +64

    I have an uncle that really needs to hear this but if he knew I sent it to him I think he'd become violent...

    • @TheNeoVid
      @TheNeoVid 19 днів тому

      A member of the law & order party committing violence? Unthinkable!

    • @butterflystampede1945
      @butterflystampede1945 19 днів тому +5

      Try another way. Ask one of your friends from a different county pretend to be Christian and that he "needs to see this for the love of God!" That should work😊

    • @leanysealvarado7499
      @leanysealvarado7499 18 днів тому

      Send it anyway 🤷🏾‍♀️

    • @MakCurrel
      @MakCurrel 18 днів тому +1

      I'm sure he would try to legit vote for this guy. He might not see the satire and tell you the man is 100% correct. 😮

    • @unknownsoldierx637
      @unknownsoldierx637 18 днів тому

      I'll send it to him. Send me contact info. I won't even say anything to him.

  • @agonzalez8924
    @agonzalez8924 23 дні тому +85

    Honestly if a republican politician gave a speech like this in front of conservative voters, they'd fall in line and get behind it anyway because they also respond to "strong" leadership. We've all heard conservative commentary, they like when someone speaks confidently and "tells it like it is"

    • @katiekofemug
      @katiekofemug 23 дні тому +16

      IKR?!! nothing like secret knowledge of "truth" to secure the base that is absolutely certain they'll be at the right hand of that strong leader, hacking down the unworthy. It never, ever occurs to them they're next not above.

    • @SceptileDude254
      @SceptileDude254 23 дні тому

      These people are lemmings. Not smart enough to pick up their brains out of primeval thinking of "big man talk lot = good man".
      The same kinds of people we have had since medieval times.

    • @MLBlue30
      @MLBlue30 22 дні тому

      "He speaks his mind." - something my Dad said about Trump. So much meaningless nonsensical fluff. It means he's tickling your ears, you thoughtless rube.

    • @jackabug2475
      @jackabug2475 20 днів тому +2

      @@katiekofemug "I never thought leopards would eat MY face!"

    • @willie728
      @willie728 20 днів тому

      💯

  • @heavyecho1
    @heavyecho1 23 дні тому +89

    This is scarily brilliant. If Steve ever became a Republican, the Dems would be in serious trouble. He comes across a genuine demigogue and believes in what he is saying. It just goes to show how shallow their speeches actually are.

    • @dominicfucinari1942
      @dominicfucinari1942 23 дні тому

      The Fraternal American Trust of Christians Outspoken for Certitude, Knowledge, and Sensibility perfectly encapsulates the blatant political machine that big United Statish ministries have allowed themselves to turn into in exchange for putting their hierarchs in the lap of luxury.

    • @MLBlue30
      @MLBlue30 22 дні тому +3

      Agreed. A perfect wolf in sheep's clothing.

  • @perks6292
    @perks6292 23 дні тому +83

    The Fraternal American Trust of Christians Outspoken for Certitude, Knowledge & Sensibility, A.K.A. the F.A.T. C.O.C.K.S.

    • @keirfarnum6811
      @keirfarnum6811 23 дні тому +8

      Acronyms ‘R’ Us! 😂. I didn’t even catch that one. Nicely done. 👍🏻

    • @jasonmast7769
      @jasonmast7769 23 дні тому +1

      uspto, trademark's.... aaand done. cya in the midterms

  • @gcb345
    @gcb345 23 дні тому +104

    And this is why church attendance is down.

    • @CMDRZero01
      @CMDRZero01 23 дні тому +12

      I don't think it's the only reason, but there were enough.

    • @willie728
      @willie728 20 днів тому +1

      💯💯💯

    • @luckymuddypaw
      @luckymuddypaw 20 днів тому +2

      Fr I haven't directly been asked that question but I have almost screamed it at my parish priests multiple times bc it's so obvious

  • @jasonsmith2759
    @jasonsmith2759 23 дні тому +72

    If the God of the Christian Bible existed, I think he would smit the conservative Christians a long time ago for soiling his name.

    • @jimslim4227
      @jimslim4227 23 дні тому +10

      I mean old testament god would in theory be on board but old testament god already had his chosen group that waged wars for him and burned down cities in his name.

    • @brenatevi
      @brenatevi 23 дні тому +17

      Nah. Any god willing to torture and kill "their own son" will be nodding right along. Jesus on the other hand might have other opinions, but he's been dead two thousand years, so who knows.

    • @mattmorehouse9685
      @mattmorehouse9685 23 дні тому

      @@jimslim4227 Not to mention they had to kill everyone for plenty of them. The men women, children, sheep, goats and cattle with some of those cities. So not only is Yahweh a monster, but also wasteful to boot. And for the ones they didn't kill everyone, they tended to take the virgin girls as sex slaves- sorry "wives". But I'm sure the parts where God orders mass deaths were just from human error, even though the Bible has not indication that a different level of respect is to be accorded to the parts where he is slaughtering cities and ordering rape. As long as liberal Christians still try to twist in knots to get their holy book off the hook, there will be more evidence that their Yahweh is along side the conservatives for genocide and narcissism.

    • @mattmorehouse9685
      @mattmorehouse9685 22 дні тому +4

      @@jimslim4227 I think Jesus would be a wildcard. Sure he says you should turn the other cheek... sometimes, and sometimes he says he will set daughters against their mothers and sons against their fathers. Not to mention, he's the one that made hell. So it depends on how he's feeling.

    • @WWZenaDo
      @WWZenaDo 21 день тому +1

      ​@mattmorehouse9685. Depends on how he's feeling... Like Trump!
      Now I understand why some Republicans call Trump the 'orange jesus'.

  • @itcouldbelupus2842
    @itcouldbelupus2842 23 дні тому +104

    Love these.
    It's SO telling how Republicans are too scared to comment on any of these videos, they don't want to touch these videos.

    • @dominicfucinari1942
      @dominicfucinari1942 23 дні тому +16

      Sympathizers with the Mississippi and Alabama Strategy are probably just self-aware enough to realize how evil their favorite multi-Megadollar ministries are in the face of Shives saying the quiet parts out loud for them to reflect on.

    • @ZyliahWar
      @ZyliahWar 23 дні тому +13

      Steve's also said he deletes those types of comments. But I imagine there still aren't many showing up.

    • @CitanulsPumpkin
      @CitanulsPumpkin 23 дні тому +14

      Steve has said before that he goes through his comments and bans the nazis that try to spam him.

    • @itcouldbelupus2842
      @itcouldbelupus2842 22 дні тому +2

      @@ZyliahWar fair enough, I just can't imagine a Republican being brave enough to try and argue with something like this, especially the one about women.
      I doubt he had to delete many on that one, he so ruthlessly bodies the conservative mentality towards women.

    • @itcouldbelupus2842
      @itcouldbelupus2842 22 дні тому

      @@CitanulsPumpkin that's decent of him, because I would definitely waste my time and raise my cortisol levels by fighting with them.
      Hard to kick the rush you get from rubbing a fash nose in their evil beliefs while they do Olympic level mental gymnastics to try and make something evil sound good.

  • @edwardzignot2681
    @edwardzignot2681 23 дні тому +84

    My bestie who's completely secular, never been to church, never read the bible, and gives zero f@cks about religion told me she couldn't imagine me "praying" the other day. This turned into a conversation about my ten or so years of being a Baptist, a period that was ended by my actually reading the bible. I started telling her the specific parts of the bible that smashed my faith and caused me to become an atheist. She was absolutely speechless when it came to some of the horrifying crap in that book. Kept asking me "how do Christians justify this stuff?" I had to tell her that most Christians haven't read the bible and are only familiar with the bits cherry picked by their pastor for sermons. She couldn't believe for instance, that anyone would still be Christian knowing the whole bit where Lot tells the mob not to "hurt" the two angels disguised as men, but to take his daughters instead! It's just interesting how a normal person who has never been religious reacts to some of this stuff.

    • @stillaworkinprogress2147
      @stillaworkinprogress2147 23 дні тому +18

      Did you tell her how Lot's daughters felt so sorry that their mom was turned into a pillar of salt that they got their daddy (Lot) drunk and each "lay with him" so they could "preserve his seed"? Genesis 19:30-38

    • @MichaelRainey
      @MichaelRainey 23 дні тому +24

      Actually reading the Bible is the best way to convert someone away from Christianity.

    • @wizquinn8021
      @wizquinn8021 22 дні тому +9

      ​@@MichaelRaineyher story is similar to mine. Actually reading and studying the Bible lead me to deconversion. My wife is starting to see the crazy in the Bible.

    • @Dragonkrux
      @Dragonkrux 22 дні тому +5

      I sweat to the Great Atheismo... I'm a better Christian now since deconstructing to Atheism than I was as a believer.

    • @WWZenaDo
      @WWZenaDo 21 день тому +11

      The sickest thing about the "Lot" story is that the girls were so underage that they hadn't even begun to menstruate, as girls were (and still are!) given into the actual marriage (in the Middle East) once they've begun menstruating. Also the tale about the girls supposedly seducing their father later on was far more likely that Lot forced himself onto his daughters, and then blamed them for 'seducing' him.

  • @abrslam
    @abrslam 23 дні тому +36

    The "LGBTQIABC123 times up"Is actually a really clever turn of phrase. I honestly wouldn't be surprised to hear bigots start using it.

    • @LegoDork
      @LegoDork 22 дні тому

      They use it all the time.

    • @MLBlue30
      @MLBlue30 22 дні тому +1

      They love their memes and catchphrases.

    • @madrooky1398
      @madrooky1398 22 дні тому +3

      That is how everyone is nowaday using the term "woke" without even knowing what it actually meant originally. Such terms serve a shortcut to prevent meaningful thoughts.

    • @Dragonkrux
      @Dragonkrux 22 дні тому

      I could have sworn that was an actual quote

  • @francoislacombe9071
    @francoislacombe9071 23 дні тому +57

    Loved the dark blue suit, the red tie and the bad hair.The only thing missing was the fake orange tan. 😂

    • @kentesdall308
      @kentesdall308 23 дні тому +2

      Do you suppose he had a loaded diaper too.

    • @MLBlue30
      @MLBlue30 22 дні тому

      Poor Steve just isn't materialistic enough to be genuine. I can't believe I just said dieting do oxymoronic but here we are are.

    • @Dragonkrux
      @Dragonkrux 22 дні тому +3

      Forgot it needed a flag to fondle

    • @tunneloflight
      @tunneloflight 21 годину тому

      @@DragonkruxThat's the wrong f word. Start with humping proceed to --- Hey Donnie. Get the hell away from that flag! Jeezzz

  • @justina8721
    @justina8721 23 дні тому +65

    You should run for Congress. You'd probably win if you're in a red district.

  • @lasseehrenreich5502
    @lasseehrenreich5502 23 дні тому +52

    Steve you made a video about the hypocrisy, selfishness, and cynicism of Christian conservatives on my birthday - Iøm really lucky.

  • @floydb5668
    @floydb5668 23 дні тому +29

    I’m a recovering Catholic myself, it’s all nonsense. I don’t have a problem with people having faith but only to the point of reason which they go past every time.

    • @willie728
      @willie728 20 днів тому +2

      Very well put 💯

    • @floydb5668
      @floydb5668 18 днів тому +2

      Science is my god at this point in my life. I can’t believe in an imaginary person in the heavens.

  • @Ragnarok345
    @Ragnarok345 22 дні тому +24

    Guarantee there are Republicans out there who haven’t seen a single Steve video, who would watch this and go “Damn, that guy seems pretty great! Talks a lotta sense! Hope he runs in the next election!”
    They’d sit there and listen to him insult them to their faces over and over again and “This guy’s very honest. Speaks what’s on his mind with no filter. I like that in a leader.” I mean, that’s basically what they do when they watch Star Trek.

  • @agent_meister477
    @agent_meister477 23 дні тому +35

    I was going to ask if this speech was hard to write. But when I thought about the subject matter I realised that it practically wrote itself.

  • @Deondre_Clark
    @Deondre_Clark 23 дні тому +41

    Been watching these "if they said the quiet part videos" for awhile and I'm pretty sure that if a Republican said this one word for word they would win the evangelical vote

    • @MLBlue30
      @MLBlue30 22 дні тому

      Modern American Christianity is all unbiblical hypocrtical hucksterism. A cult that won't die without a lot of kicking and screaming.

    • @darcy5761
      @darcy5761 17 днів тому

      Evangelicals the worst ,most bigoted perverted group around.

    • @tunneloflight
      @tunneloflight 21 годину тому

      His name is Donald Trump - pronounced be-elzabub.

  • @mattcat83
    @mattcat83 23 дні тому +45

    Parody is best when it treads a thin line that blurs with sincere performance.

  • @saintkohle
    @saintkohle 23 дні тому +14

    This was accurate enough to make me think that autoplay dumped me into the wrong side of UA-cam for a minute. Well done.

  • @politicalsideshow
    @politicalsideshow 20 днів тому +10

    As a former Pentecostal minister and Republican, you nailed! 🎉. Well done!

  • @jstareagle9523
    @jstareagle9523 21 день тому +13

    I would *love* to see this character in a sketch with Miss Betty Bowers, America's Best Christian. Former Calvinist here, lol. Proud gay pagan polyamorous socialist now.

    • @Datan0de
      @Datan0de 18 днів тому

      High five from a former Catholic, now proud bi atheist polyamorous socialist!

  • @lowellcunningham3332
    @lowellcunningham3332 23 дні тому +17

    In case it wasn't obvious, everything the Republican said about God in the Constitution and Pledge of Allegiance was wrong. I kept expecting that to be made explicit.

    • @seangoldman6833
      @seangoldman6833 19 днів тому

      We really should push to have the national motto be returned to "E pluribus unum". It's a lot more pertinent to our country and not a scared declaration trying to differentiate us from the "godless" communists of the USSR.

    • @Datan0de
      @Datan0de 18 днів тому +1

      I came to the comments just to see if anyone had pointed that out. Thank you.

  • @KoRntech
    @KoRntech 23 дні тому +212

    God is my price savior, and the flag is what I use to blind myself from the issues that matter. Ignorance is Bliss!

    • @dionmcgee5610
      @dionmcgee5610 19 днів тому +12

      Ignorance may be bliss- but only for the ignorant.
      The rest of us have to clean their shit up.
      Like with the Donald.

    • @user-ml6dk8sk4e
      @user-ml6dk8sk4e 18 днів тому +2

      Figures!

    • @analogalien651
      @analogalien651 18 днів тому +2

      Their ignorance is my pain

    • @MovieMakingMan
      @MovieMakingMan 9 днів тому

      Ezekiel 23:20!

    • @pippishortstocking7913
      @pippishortstocking7913 8 днів тому

      Hard cringe. So in other words you're literally the personification of a person being willfully ignorant.

  • @xileets
    @xileets 21 день тому +12

    I'm just impressed he can get through this whole thing with gusto and commitment, and NOT vomit at least once.

  • @robertdascoli949
    @robertdascoli949 22 дні тому +11

    "Jesus was just like me, a free market capitalist."
    That needs to go on a t-shirt

  • @KikoNYC
    @KikoNYC 23 дні тому +24

    That bible got more action than I had in a long time!

  • @getnohappy
    @getnohappy 23 дні тому +14

    Behind The Bastards (Podcast) did a great few episodes of how American Christianity went from generally socialist at the turn of the 19th/20th century to, well, this hysterical hypocritical insanity.

    • @shadsie5484
      @shadsie5484 21 день тому +1

      I loved that BtB episode! (Set of episodes)!

  • @thing_under_the_stairs
    @thing_under_the_stairs 23 дні тому +25

    You would make an outstanding televangelist, and I'm not sure if this fact is hilarious, terrifying, or both.

  • @Alexander_Stern1
    @Alexander_Stern1 23 дні тому +18

    I was watching this when a coworker walked in. Steve was in the middle of one of the “sincere” bits (where he was talking about how America is a Christian nation) and it took a minute before my coworker asked, “Is this satire?”

  • @jordansean18
    @jordansean18 23 дні тому +14

    If they did say the quiet part out loud, how many voters would they actually lose?
    They might even go up.

    • @MLBlue30
      @MLBlue30 22 дні тому

      Trump is a proven criminal facing possible jail time and it hasn't hurt his chances in the slightest. And they think they are trapped in clown world with us... yeah right.

  • @JP-JustSayin
    @JP-JustSayin 23 дні тому +14

    There are only 3 sins: treating people like objects, crediting systemic outcomes (good or bad) to the actions of individuals, and wasting food.

    • @literaterose6731
      @literaterose6731 23 дні тому +12

      No argument with your list, but you did forget one:
      4. Ignoring the cat.

  • @BradsPitts.
    @BradsPitts. 22 дні тому +6

    I love that “under God” was only added to the Pledge in the 1950’s lol

  • @johnosborne3187
    @johnosborne3187 19 днів тому +5

    "Useful' is probably the most concise, accurate description of religion I have heard.

  • @Kastila
    @Kastila 23 дні тому +20

    At first I was thinking this felt a little too real, then it got to the bit where a right-wing politician found the spot an I felt like we were back in fiction territory again.
    Phew.

  • @iamthewalrus8391
    @iamthewalrus8391 23 дні тому +18

    Fraternal American Trust of Christians Outspoken for Certitude, Knowledge, and Sensibility is a fun acronym easter egg

  • @CoraFrances
    @CoraFrances 23 дні тому +8

    😱 This just gave me the worst anxiety. I realize that this is not the same thing, but it reminded me of when I needed to move my mother's car if I had to go somewhere. It never failed that as soon as the car started, my ears would be assaulted by a static Christian radio station at full blast with either James Dobson or some nut job preacher screaming about being persecuted or begging for donations. Or scare mongering about the rapture. Ok, I gotta go take a few deep calming breaths now. 😵‍💫

  • @misanikolic1096
    @misanikolic1096 22 дні тому +6

    Boy I really hope Steve has a soundproof studio.

  • @jimvenizelos4649
    @jimvenizelos4649 19 днів тому +6

    What's amusing is that a devout Christian conservative will watch this and 'believe' this just based on tone. They won't even recognize the sarcasm.

  • @playwrightwoman86
    @playwrightwoman86 23 дні тому +7

    Ok as an Exvangelical I gotta say this was your best work yet! You nailed it!!

  • @user-kn7hm5kd2q
    @user-kn7hm5kd2q 22 дні тому +6

    I watched a video about 30 years ago that talked about the founding fathers and that the vast majority of them were atheist but knew they needed to somehow keep it separate from politics. At least they tried! Great job Steve 👏!

  • @Troubleshooter125
    @Troubleshooter125 23 дні тому +20

    Tell you what, Steve: your little tirade took me back to my senior year in high school, our production of _Finian's Rainbow,_ and a similar rant offered by one of the characters in that piece:
    _Gentlemen, the festering tides of radicalism are upon us. But before I yield up our glorious South -and her sister commowealth, the U.S. of A - I will lay down my life. I will do more - I will filibuster. Back, you crackpots! Forward, America! Forward to the hallowed principles of our forefathers. Forward to the sweet tranquility of the status quo. Forward... to yesterday!_
    -- Senator Billboard Rawkins
    Different bigotry, but the same idea, really.

    • @mattmorehouse9685
      @mattmorehouse9685 11 днів тому

      Forward to yesterday seems a really good summation of US Christianity. They're obsessed with dragging us back to the 50s because they've imbibed the propaganda on tv and the internet that that time was just the greatest. That and it was nice and racist and sexist, so they could beat their wives and didn't have to see anyone with more melanin.

  • @joebove4
    @joebove4 23 дні тому +18

    Never read the Bible, but he knows and loves him some Revelation.

  • @larrybliss8330
    @larrybliss8330 23 дні тому +5

    Steve, I am glad you're on our side.

  • @dano8902
    @dano8902 23 дні тому +14

    Oh man...that last part was so on the mark it left me in a state of discomfort. The implications of exactly how true that quote is in this context is genuinely terrifying.

  • @Darth_Draconus
    @Darth_Draconus 23 дні тому +17

    I love this so much. Thanks, Steve😂😂 This is is absolutely brilliant.

  • @oldreprobate2748
    @oldreprobate2748 20 днів тому +6

    The quiet part is that they've never read the Bible.

  • @kyleoates6367
    @kyleoates6367 23 дні тому +8

    Church attendance totally makes sense being down now.
    Why go to church if you get your sermons on a daily basis from politicians?

    • @muchograndeyolatengo
      @muchograndeyolatengo 18 днів тому +1

      Apparently it's down too because a growing part of certain congregations now think that Jesus is too woke. You can't make this shit up! 😂

  • @Vulcanerd
    @Vulcanerd 23 дні тому +14

    Ok, so a bit of your speech I really enjoyed and appreciated and, as you were reciting it, I thought, "Wait a minute, I don't think that's right..." I went up and looked to see if god is mentioned in the US Constitution, nope. And the phrase, "In God We Trust" and the pledge of allegiance was not something the 'founding fathers' came up with seeing as they were added late in the 19th century.
    Then there are all the nonsensical stuff your character mentioned like how god decided Islam was evil... even though, in the Abrahamic religions, all the gods are the same.
    Brilliant stuff!

    • @bobvee1694
      @bobvee1694 22 дні тому +2

      “Under God” was added to the pledge of allegiance during the Eisenhower administration in 1954. “In God We Trust” became an official motto, and was mandated on all currency, in 1955.

    • @WWZenaDo
      @WWZenaDo 21 день тому

      ​@@bobvee1694 Thank you for correcting that misinformation. All of that came out of Wisconsin Republican Senator Joseph R. McCarthy's 1950 use of fear-mongering about communism and socialism in an attempt to install an authoritarian christo-fascist government in America.

  • @sherwinfitz
    @sherwinfitz 19 днів тому +5

    If you didn't tell them it was satire, they'd cheer for this guy.

  • @austinluther5825
    @austinluther5825 23 дні тому +9

    You are scarily good at this.

  • @drottercat
    @drottercat 20 днів тому +2

    Man, this is outstanding. The writing and the performance. Tour de force.

  • @ghostporcupine
    @ghostporcupine 23 дні тому +15

    I was listening while making breakfast and the fondling shook me awake 😂

  • @SylviaRustyFae
    @SylviaRustyFae 23 дні тому +4

    May the algo bless this vid with the views your channel truly deserves

  • @spencerjoplin2885
    @spencerjoplin2885 22 дні тому +6

    Oh, to hack a teleprompter at CPAC with this speech. I’m thinking Lauren Boebert, maybe Ben Carson.

  • @therealshadow99
    @therealshadow99 23 дні тому +10

    The funniest part is that we have historical evidence that the modern 'old testament' part of the bible doesn't even look much like one would have originally as things were added and removed. A lot of the condemning of people who were different (gay, women as lesser, etc) comes from those additions done by biggest who managed to get control of the early church at least a few different times.

    • @WWZenaDo
      @WWZenaDo 21 день тому +2

      That's NOT an accurate description of the "Documentary Hypothesis". There were multiple factions struggling for political power using religion (of course) to tout their particular versions, and incorporation of older Sumerian legends via the Babylonian conquest of Jerusalem (particularly the second version of the tales of creation, Genesis chapter 2 beginning in verse 4), and far too much more to go into detail here.
      The New Testament also shows power struggles among various factions of early Christianity, far more so than nearly all Christians are aware of.

  • @Wordfishtrombone
    @Wordfishtrombone 23 дні тому +12

    I’ve been down a recent rabbit hole about Independent Fundamental Baptist churches. I grew up in a similar church/school/friend group. It’s amazing how even the people who don’t know they’re being controlled manipulate others to keep the power structure

    • @miskatonic_alumni
      @miskatonic_alumni 22 дні тому

      There's a reason why the number of rightwing schools of thought that practice material analysis is zero.

  • @hendrsb33
    @hendrsb33 23 дні тому +11

    That wig... that wig! 🤣Just as funny as the person it sits atop.

    • @Mario-vq6jv
      @Mario-vq6jv 23 дні тому +2

      it gives me Kavanaugh vibes 😆

  • @jrsydvl7218
    @jrsydvl7218 23 дні тому +10

    I just hope Steve is doing these as parodies and not raising an army of knuckle-dragging bible-thumpers.

  • @tyherty45
    @tyherty45 23 дні тому +3

    Man Steve, you’re too good at this! Do you ever throw up a little in your mouth when you do these skits?

  • @rickbrookes9491
    @rickbrookes9491 23 дні тому +3

    This is so fantastic! The end was simply perfect!

  • @DawnDavidson
    @DawnDavidson 22 дні тому +4

    I was not expecting to need to file one of your videos under “erotica,” but here we are.

  • @nathanowen1328
    @nathanowen1328 23 дні тому +8

    I did not see the quote from Revelations at the end coming, but it was very nicely done.

  • @weirdkitty07
    @weirdkitty07 23 дні тому +10

    I treat the old testament as 'angry young god with angst who wants to smite everyone' and the new testament as 'more focused god who has changed his mind and wants only to smite the powerful and give to the poor'.

    • @MichaelRainey
      @MichaelRainey 23 дні тому +3

      Having a kid really mellowed Him out.

    • @mattmorehouse9685
      @mattmorehouse9685 23 дні тому +1

      From what I've heard Jesus is the one who made hell. So is he really all that much better than his old man?

    • @nordos
      @nordos 22 дні тому +3

      @@mattmorehouse9685 nah, hell is an old concept. Except that the old concept basically boiled down to 'place without god' which doesn't sound bad enough.
      So, in the middle ages, they kinda rebranded hell to be filled with fire and eternal torture. Dunno how much of a role Jesus played in all of that (I think there are passages about Fire and all), but the current imaginery doesn't go that far back (Dantes Inferno was a major influence for example)

    • @WWZenaDo
      @WWZenaDo 21 день тому +1

      Then you've totally missed all of the struggles and power plays between various factions in the early evolution of Christianity.

  • @Jayk129
    @Jayk129 23 дні тому +8

    So I figure we’ve got what like six weeks before we can all enjoy this again when Atheist channels like Sir Sic, Viced Rhino, TheSkepTick, Professor Plink, etc. release response videos to all the bat-sh*t crazy Christian meltdown videos we’re about to get from this. Great Job Steve 👍 Thanks for the awesome birthday present!

  • @brian.the.archivist
    @brian.the.archivist 23 дні тому +10

    One of the things that get me about the Christian nationalists is that all levers of government are dominated by Christians. So... since it can't be about Christians being in charge, is it about my type of christian? My actual religion imposed on people (which they'd deny)? My flavorite brand of christian values dominating?
    I don't think most of them think that far beyond gut reactions about change and loss of privilege, but the rhetorical question is out there

    • @aureyd2515
      @aureyd2515 23 дні тому

      The day after they declare the USA is a theocracy, I don't think they'll bother the heathens that much. They'll go right to the Christian versus Christian religious wars and persecutions.

    • @mattmorehouse9685
      @mattmorehouse9685 11 днів тому

      Yeah, I'd say you're right. The majority of conservatives view change as something inherently untrustworthy and think everything should be like when they were young- or at least, what they think their younger years were like. I've noticed some of the most vocal elements of online fandoms scream and bitch that the original meaning of a work is sacrosanct- in between completely butchering said meaning. Like the faux smart chuds who complain that the sequel trilogy had to be "realistic". But not in like a way that would invalidate the ot, where ties make sound in space, ftl exists and whatever powers the death star. They use "realism" as a cover for their childish opinions and military fetishes, and always leave out that Star Wars was never all that realistic, nor should it be.

  • @Jcewazhere
    @Jcewazhere 23 дні тому +4

    Almost perfect. That last part where you pick the bible back up shoulda held it upside down.
    Just my 2 cents.

  • @weirdkitty07
    @weirdkitty07 23 дні тому +6

    Woe to the hypocrites, that's Greek for bad actors, and woe to the false prophets who blaspheme in his name. Yeah, the neo cons are not going to get their reward in heaven.

  • @Taffy2727
    @Taffy2727 22 дні тому +3

    Steve, you're very good on pointing out the hypocrisy of the Republican Party and it's mindless supporters. I look forward to your next commentary. In a way, you are teaching people what is right and wrong if they would actually listen and learn.

  • @demonicusa.k.a.theblindguy3929
    @demonicusa.k.a.theblindguy3929 23 дні тому +7

    Speak the word brother Steve.

  • @millennialmatt7
    @millennialmatt7 19 днів тому +2

    To them the world is infected and needs to be cured. Never thinking that the "disease" they imagine is just that. Imagined.🤯

  • @KoRntech
    @KoRntech 23 дні тому +24

    12:44 oh my 😅

  • @RobertFoley
    @RobertFoley 23 дні тому +2

    "Chief's Kiss" sprinkles irony salt everywhere.

  • @brooksshepard9649
    @brooksshepard9649 18 днів тому

    You have out done yourself again. Well done sir. As unsettling as it is

  • @markhanson6880
    @markhanson6880 16 днів тому +1

    Amen! Preach it, Brother!

  • @jasonkean7280
    @jasonkean7280 23 дні тому +4

    yeah, that last line was a bit chilling. well done as always ;p

  • @pamr.429
    @pamr.429 23 дні тому +2

    Nice touch, ending with that bit from Revelations

  • @kevinmhadley
    @kevinmhadley 19 днів тому +2

    Very weird done.
    I like the red horse at the end. Nice touch.

  • @andrewgrandin5926
    @andrewgrandin5926 23 дні тому +6

    Thought for a moment that Steve was fixing to fuck that book.

    • @arlesthegreat
      @arlesthegreat 23 дні тому +5

      Dunno bout technicalities but I’m pretty sure the book came.

    • @pteroid11
      @pteroid11 23 дні тому +5

      Well that book’s certainly fucked a bunch of us so it’s only fair

  • @RobSeib
    @RobSeib 23 дні тому +2

    Oh man, at the end I got shivers!
    I guess theyre steve shivers.
    Seriously tho, this is the pinnacle of satire, excellent video.

  • @literaterose6731
    @literaterose6731 23 дні тому +3

    I think this is the second time I’ve hoped sincerely for an epic collab between Quiet Part Out Loud Steve and Mrs. Betty Bowers, because talk about a power couple! Though I do have slight qualms that the result could be a spontaneous generation of the Ultimate Cult, so…
    Nah, it’d still be worth it.

  • @PerfectGoat717
    @PerfectGoat717 18 днів тому +2

    This is literally just the homelander bit in season one where he’s at that religious event

  • @kchunda
    @kchunda 19 днів тому +1

    Amazing stuff. This needs to be broadcast by accident on Sunday mornings on broadcast TV instead of… wait, live church is on TV Sunday mornings STILL?!

  • @kellythompson3865
    @kellythompson3865 17 днів тому

    That was astonishing!! Wow! I'm speechless. Great!

  • @dagnabit145
    @dagnabit145 19 днів тому +1

    I brought up the same points in an argument i had with someone that wouldnt stop trying to preach to me.

  • @djwaffle
    @djwaffle 19 днів тому +1

    Thanks! You hit the nail on the head. We don't need a world with more religion/superstition we need a world without for once.