I was 23 yrs old with no children. I met a guy we started dating he was 30 yrs old. He had a child that was 10 months old at the time. He and i were dating for 3 months when he brought her over to meet me. It was in the middle of winter, so he said he had to make a run but didn't want to take her back out into the cold. It was 12 noon when he left. He didn't return for her until 3:00 a.m. the next day. I cussed him out and made him get her dressed and get out of my house. He told everyone i put him and his child out in the cold. However, he never told them the first day i met his daughter he dumped her off on me as if i was a babysitter and failed to return for her until 3:00 a.m. the next day.
I mean that is irresponsible parenting.. your first time meeting and he didn’t bother to communicate? But not everyone is a bad parent like that. I could never with my children..
@@srealone788 being a irresponsible parent and a bad parent is two different things. I don’t know what time you have on your hands miss lady, but I see in these comment section you are trolling and you not being honest about being a mother, hit dogs holler real loud.
@@Camillyahreal excuse me? My children are older now and it was late at night on a Saturday. Time on my hands? There’s hardly much of a difference between irresponsible and bad parenting. What good parent do you know? Drops their baby off with someone they just met? For over 24 hours? Why are you defending that loser? I’m not trolling. I’m speaking my mind. As much as the next person here is entitled to. If you have a problem with that? Clearly you do. Why should I care? You can speak your mind just as freely. Don’t make you right though. Ain’t you the person that only has one ☝🏼 child. I’ve raised. Supported and cared for 4! Their whole lives!!! Step back!
A bit sad for the kids like this, no one deserves to be trapped by irresponsible man, but he should've kept it in his pants in the first place if he can't make sure his LeGaCy survives and continues in peace and health. These baby daddies need a reckoning to see what the parent title entails though, so maybe they'll ask for babies as if they're puppies you can drop at the shelter once bored a lot less.
Ugh, I have a friend who only dates single Dads and this is her experience to a tee; they drag the kids to even first dates, she sees it as 'wow, they really trust me and take me seriously for a future', but I think they are just too cheap to pay for a babysitter.
That was my experience once. It was the second date and without notice or explanation he brought both of his kids. Didn't return any calls after that. At the time I was in my 20s and had no interest in being a babysitter/support parent. I raised my 3 younger siblings because my parents wouldn't do it themselves, I am not doing the same for someone else.
Sicnerlrly hope your friend grows up and stops being so naive; lot of rnen don’t even give a fvck about their own kids - they’re the most likely demographic to UNALIVE their own kids just to ‘punish’ the mother of their children just for wanting to leave them! These rnen are only doing this because they want a free nanny, not because they “trust her with their kids” - they don’t care about their kids, they just want to dump the responsibility of them onto the nearest woman and don’t care who she is or what she’s like.
@@Educatedunhousedperson that's the guy's personal problem. I would never let him visit it on me. If broke, he should save his pennies for his kiddos, rather than spending on dates, which are not essential to survival. 'Dating' is how he got into the situation in the first place, prioritizing the dumbstick over duties and responsibilities, like responsibly keeping it wrapped in its packaging.
I once had a flatmate who only revealed he had a 5-year-old child after moving in. His child would visit every two weeks. When he realized I wouldn’t take care of his son, he attempted to guilt-trip me by saying, "You have no nurturing skills and you don’t like children. His concept of parenting involved leaving his son to watch TV or taking him to the park where other kids and women were present, who he assumed would babysit for him by proxy. He thought he was a great dad btw
A coworker warned me about this when I first started dating my last boyfriend. Smh, wish I’d listened. I just thought “oh, I won’t have to have my own. I can just help him raise his and we’ll be a nice peaceful family”. Nope! I was an unpaid janitor/governess/wrangler/chef and I had absolutely no authority and barely got any time with him once they all felt comfortable with the kids being left alone with me for long stretches. It felt like the twilight zone. Blood pressure skyrocketed out of nowhere. Money was always hemorrhaging from my account. Barely got any sleep.
@@remnant1018 and you didn’t even get to experience what being an actual mother to your own blood child is like, which can be a very different & beautiful experience (not that it’s not difficult & all the things, but the connection to the child is way different). Sorry that happened to you
I am male. I agree. No one should date anyone with small children. It is a hassle. It is too much work. It is often thankless. Many times folks are ungrateful. Do not do it.
I married a dude with young kids 5 years ago worst choice ever. In 2021 he wanted me to quit my job to take care of his children for him during the summer...I said no but compromised and cut my hours at work for him to help out, but that wasnt enough...and suprise next summer same argument...following summer same argument....and now we're getting divorced...and he's already searching for a new babysitter....everyone needs to be careful about this....especially if you are childless.
I matched a dude on a dating site and we chatted for a few weeks. Then swapped numbers and video called. He finally told me he has two ex wives both woth his children. He further said, women with children should never date. I immediately clocked he was doing very little to support his ex wives and was looking for yet another woman to give children. BLOCKED.
Smart you. Good you shared. Similar story. Tried to play the victim in women have tricked him and he told me on the first date „our genes together would be amazing“ This phrases is the sign to block. I still kept dating 3 weeks. Because we had a lot of talking BUT I always need to listen up front and block not to invest time because with spending time you bond That’s why close your legs because humans bond over sex or spending time together Direct block I felt always pitty for men and always self sacrificed as women are brainwashed into this. Never again. Please be selfish and be obsessed with yourself and build healthy friendships relationships with your family friends neighbours community to have a social life and do hobbies
It is a red flag when he says that married women shouldn't date. Usually they are projecting. What is he doing to those children that he would even say that?
And yet this dingbat will stay. There is almost nothing a man can do or admit to that will make these types of women leave. Or even DATE SOMEONE ELSE AT THE SAME TIME. They’re just broken.
@@MsNatiBug they are right to be scared of leaving tho, not their fault that crazy, bad men stalk, harass, take "revenge" on their exes just for leaving or trying to leave the abuse. Let's not victim blame.
It’s usually his mom who ends up raising the baby. The idea of a man with a baby going out and picking up a woman to take care of his baby for free is just so creepy. These men must have absolutely no family, because I guarantee he would dump that baby on his mother or sister first.
@@Tess-k4o they forget that detail when they say "when we will have artificial uteruses, we will not need women anymore". Oh boy what a threat... 🤣🤣🤣🤣🤣🤣🤣🤣🤣
That must be so hard , getting attached to a sweet young child like that just to have to walk away for your own good. Its the worst, these fathers don't even care
I ended up my last relationship about a year ago when I started rescuing cats because the dude literally was jelaous and pissed that I had to take care of little kittens. He has acting out, like a child, because I was paying attention to vulnerable creatures instead of his grown ass. I was sterilizing feral cats and this dude was starting drama because he "didn't like" to use protection. I'm so grateful that he ghosted me because at least he wasn't a stalker (woman math). I ended up getting a tube ligation for myself :) and my cats are happy and healthy, thank you.
I've come to realize that men who don't like to use protection are not protectors in the slightest. Why wouldn't you want to protect a woman's future as well as your own by making sure she doesn't get pregnant. We won't even talk about the possibility of stds.
Feel like the safest option is only if all his kids are grown adults who can care for themselves. But even then he’ll still find a way to make you care for them
@ _Plus_ there’s too many instances of Women reporting the man dying and then his grown kids descend upon *Her house,* trying to lay hands to *Her belongings,* claiming “Dis iz ma Daddy stuff! You kilt ma Daddy!…” Nevermind he probably saw them 3 times their whole lives.😒😒😒 Won’t stop them from trying to pick the Woman who he loved w/ clean! #IssaNO 🙅🏾♀️🙅🏾♀️🙅🏾♀️
It’s a red flag whenever a father or mother of a very young child is trying to date while having primary custody. How do they have the time, the energy, and the emotional capacity to do both properly? Answer: They’re not focusing on being a parent, and probably have someone else doing a lot of the childcare. Young children do not benefit from having new adults coming in and out of their life. And they do not benefit from their parent being distracted, splitting their time and energy between them and their love life.
The first video is so scary because not letting move it's a huge red flag. One of my exes got extreme on a date because I wanted to go to my own house and he wanted me to come back to his place. It was in a public place, a lot of people around, nobody did anything. If you date man, pls test their "no" reactions from the start.
Definitely! Not letting someone leave, blocking their exit like that, it's a crime where i live. The way my cortisol spiked when I saw him block the door after she merely informed him that she wasn't spending the night! Several dudes have done this to me. It's in so many "romantic" films, ugh.
I left baby daddy when my daughter was 10 months old (she's 30 now) and never once looked for a step daddy. He however, replaced me with a new woman 30 days after our break up. This intelligent woman never stopped to consider why I left to be a single mom to an infant rather than be with him. She married him and found out.
I believe they feel entitled because there are many women who accepted that role for years. Meanwhile women with small children run the risk of exposing their kids to predators.
Despite my mom teaching me never to date a man with kids, I did for a couple of months not fully realizing he did, and it came out eventually not only that he had two kids but also that he did NOT have shared custody or visitation rights. The story basically told itself, all I had to do was put one and one together and once I figured it out I sprinted in the other direction 😂
I told my ex I would support him and his family if he wanted to do 50/50 with his babies mother... I Said SUPPORT not raise!!!! His dad and sisters who none of them work wanted me to do all the child care.... I work and have my own children. There's no fucking way.
A male who’s left their child’s mother is a HUGE red flag. No woman in her right mind breaks up with a good man when she’s pregnant or has young children. So you’re either dealing with an abewsive nam (which is the case 99% of the time), or he’s truly got a crazy ex (which means he prefers the excitement of a crazy woman and not you); neither of these is a green flag situation for you.
Okay, this also applies to men with kids if any ages, even adult ones. They expect the stepmom or grand mom to help out their adult step kids with money, labour and childcare. It's disgusting.
Dear young men and women, please know that from the moment you have children, they will "steal"/share the limelight with your partner FOREVER, not only when they're toddlers.
Please show this video to all the women in your life and family. I am utterly shocked at the amount of women who are playing mom to children that are not even their's. My baby's father left me to be with his side piece and the girl played step mom to our child so he could keep his freedom and reduce his child support payment. After marrying her and giving her 2 children he thanked her by leaving her for a much younger side piece he met through a friend. Don't play step mother to a mails children because you are wasting your precious time and you could be using that precious time on other things.
Yup! They're always looking for the next 'best thing'. More women need to embrace the single CF life, because I promise you your life will be much happier and way more peaceful when you're not stuck playing step mom for a m's kids.
This is why I'm staying far away from single fathers. I would try to stay for the kids' sake. They know that and use it to keep you with them. CPS exists if the child is unsafe with him, staying only enables more bad behavior from the man.
I have one kid and still won't date males with children. I'm a single mom and I know how draining it can be, he has time to entertain me but not his kids plus I know he is not helping the mom by being around me.
It depends, but im also like why isnt he with the mom, now i came from a dv situation, but im verry loyal at heart, and dont think i want to be with a man Who cant work through issues, but then that would mean his other relationship would also need to be toxic for it to make sense to me why he left, but then i dont want to deal with other peoples toxic exes, on top of that he could be toxic himself and caused the breakup, or he has unhealed trauma.... Honestly im already like im not gonna date anyone anyways until 1 im healed myself, 2 i find someone thats absolutely worth it
@@Misandrist777 💯💯💯. I have kids and I don't date single dads. I'm not looking for a free babysitter like they are. Women get played because we're always trying to be 'fair' when the world isn't fair to us. It's just not the same and I don't know why people pretend it is.
That man either took that baby to his mother's/sister's house or called some other silly woman to come over and take care of the baby. I guarantee he did not spend the night alone with that baby.
Elon Musk did this to Tallulah. He met her at a bar, slept with her, professed his love, flew her to the US, and she raised his 5 boys. Let's not forget that during his first marriage, after losing his first baby, he demanded IVF, and his wife then had twin boys, then triplet boys.
@@marys2406 well technically men are s3xual commies. The state provides men with wifes by using religions and laws, so that women have to marry in order to eat and have a roof over their heads. If women had free choice and a way to earn money, women reject most men. So I agree with your point, but really all men are s3xually on the left. They do NOT want to compete for women, but force women to marry them.
It's interesting how in fairy tales, the step mom is always portrayed as evil. It's propaganda to make step moms feel like they have break their backs caring for their step children, or they're evil. There was a much higher demand for step moms because lots of women died in childbirth. It all makes sense.
No. Evil stepmothers are just that. Mine is evil, I know plenty of evil ones and I didn't need Disney to define it. Women are not good at playing second fiddle to anyone and don't want to share resources with children she did not birth. We women are not this mythical creatures you want to believe in 😂 we are humans and are just as frail as males. We are different in some ways but not all.
@@shiina29 stepmoms are expected to do everything and they are still hated. None of it is ever enough. Stepdads are considered saintly for just existing in the same house as their stepkids. They don't even have to do anything. If he's not abusing them, he's automatically an angel 😇.
My friend was in a similar situation. She was dating a guy and the moment she moved in with him he moved his two young sons in and she had to take care of them. She was blindsided and was pissed so she stayed. He also told her she had to appear her best when they were out in public. I put that nicely, he didn’t. He also told her that the house was his and she didn’t have rights to anything. Just wild!!!
that is so sad for the bio mom. My ex husband tried to do the same, but I had a lawyer with 4 decades of experience and she swept the floor with them, luckily. So sad there's women out there, like your friend, who believe their lies and are willing to support a man that takes his kids away from the love and safety of their bio mom, out of spite. They only get new supply so that a new woman is there to do everything he wont do for his own kids.
Oh, man.... a few years ago, I was semi-active on dating sites and my profile said I didn't want to date someone with kids. One guy sent me a long, nasty, ranting message about how I was such a huge B* for not wanting to date people with children. I have been single and celibate for many years and deleted all my apps. I'm done.
I matched with a guy on an online dating site. We were chatting online. We had not even gone on a first date when he asked if I could pick up his 4 yo from daycare to take along on our first date. I like kids but NOPE!
@@GwenevereRuthalmost as crazy as the guy who wanted me to “at least consider” carrying his child. I’m childfree due to medical issues… he said everyone has bad genes so I should still have his kid. We had only been messaging for a day. 💀
i started talking to a guy ( age 21) and I quickly learned he had 2 kids under the age of 5 with his "crazy" ex. He literally was outlining that he expected any woman that came into his life needed to learn to co parent with his children's mother (even though as he said she's a cheater, a liar, and crazy) and basically would be last in his priorities. I found it wild because I don't have any of that going on in my life. And he has some nerve to think that someone should put up with less than they deserve and expect her to invest her time and energy into his messy life.
And that's exactly why nem with small children, or even single CF nem get so mad whenever single CF women refuse to date them. They feel so entitled to a woman's free labour and expect her to take over their paternal duties. The nam in this video was already showing warning signs when his gf was trying to leave. Yeah, no. It's time to run, girl! 🏃🏾♀️
Met a man at my job. We had a good convo and vibed well. He asked me out and told me that he wanted to cook for me. I was ready for him to cook me dinner like he promised until he told me that he has 6 children..... 🤮🤮🤮
The fact that he probably thinks she's asking him if she can go. She's telling you she is going because you don't own her! This man is confused about who he is and how much power he actually holds, he's also confused about his own responsibilities.
I have been waiting for a video like this since they always want to shame single mothers ( who stayed and took care of the child they helped make) and are sooooooo quiet about the part where there’s a dad who completely forfeit on his responsibilities.
His kid is choking on something and he's trying to blame and threaten unrelated third party who did not sign up for some nanny contract from what we can hear. The entitlement for free babying of him and the kid is insane.
I learned this the hard way while dating a man with 3 children. Within a couple months he had me taking care of him and his kids at my home for the weekends he had them. And he didn't have them often. Which was another red flag. He even got me to help him out new grass in his backyard, with hard labor, bc "I had the experience and knew how to do it". But yeah, hell naw don't ever do that shit. Also, if he's not with a woman he JUST had a kid with, TF he supposed to do for me? 🤷🏾♀️ Sidenote: I do miss his mom. She was so sweet and I enjoyed her company. But not enough to endure him.
My rule for dating men with kids years ago, was their kids had to be old enough to drive and were able to take care of themselves. I'm good with kids, but I had no desire to "babysit" someone else's. I didn't have the same rule for women I dated, because single moms rarely put those type of expectations on me. They were much better at creating boundaries for themselves and their children, which to me always made them the better parent in general. But single fathers kind of want us to "take over" and meet their kids too soon. They know if we do, we may get emotionally attached to them and then want to help out when the kids are with dad. I experienced that a few times with single dads who had young kids, so then I implemented the "kids must be old enough to drive" rule. That actually worked pretty well, so then I didn't feel guilty if I was dating a man who had older kids, as if I needed to swoop in and help out. So many women feel obligated to, so we need to set better boundaries for ourselves.
Also it's easy to walk away from their kids because they can't get anything from the kids, they realize they are the ones who have to give give give to the kids they don't want to give anything! To their kids
I don't believe all single dads view their kids as competition. I'm just not going to be the free babysitter anymore 🤷 Every single dad I've dated wants a maid, mother, free babysitter, while they refuse to marry (blaming "baby mamma" for that instead of taking accountability), and they get to go out and socialize and flirt with whoever they want. Most of the time their kid(s) insufferable brats who run back to their mom saying what an awful stepmom you are for asking them to clean their room or help with chores anyways. Nope. No more!
So so so so true!!! I left my ex husband when my child was a BABY!!! to GTFO ASAP, I left him everything so the divorce would OVER in 2 months. He got the house, the car, etc. all I wanted was freedom. The second I left, his new GF was the one taking care of the baby duing his parenting time, AND, she paid the child support, took over the house payments fixed up the house, ( since I didnt, i knew I was leaving) !! And then my ex did the kudegra, of up and selling the house for a LOSS, just to stalk me in the new state I had moved to. She called me 10 years later, PISSED OFF wanting me to testify at a trial, but I didnt get involved. When I was dating, I dated men with children, since I had a young child, but I wouldnt recommend. Men with children complain that women expect men to accept their children, but get annoyed when women do not date men with young children. Well thats easy, its because women DO EVERYTHING. Dating a man with kids, means, you are now taking care of HIS kids, AND YOURS! I ended up marrying someone that didnt have kids, thank god. He adopted my child, when my ex's girlfriends child support payments stopped.
@@christopherbrown5409women are the ones who end up taking care of the children, regardless of who the children’s bio parent is. so if she’s taking care of her own child, how does that make her like a man/leech who expects a woman to take care of his kid so he doesn’t have to?
Videos like this make me glad i wasn’t “chosen” for step motherhood by my first boyfriend. My high school boyfriend had a 5 year old daughter. I proposed to him senior year. He turned me down! Now i see it as a blessing in disguise. King baby is very true but honestly that term applies moreso to the childless men i dated who duped me into thinking they wanted to me dads but they actually wanted me to mother THEM. My ex who had a daughter wasn’t necessarily a king baby - but he was an adult who was into teenagers which is disgusting af.
I think the only reason a woman should date a man with children is if all of his children are grown and self-sufficient and there are literally no decent childless men around her. Sorry but I think being a stepparent is such a shit deal for women we shouldn't even try to be a part of a broken family situation. Plus, like OP said, if a man can't keep the woman he got pregnant, 99% of the time it's because he was probably a bad partner and/or father. Fix your relationship with your baby mama or be single and focus on your kid for the next 18 years.
Plus he is not financially able to create another family because he has to pay already so the next women don’t have any benefits nothing , no time and money. No quality.
@@Alicewunderimlandyup, one of the many reasons childless women shouldn’t get involved with single dads, his focus will never be 100% on you and the family you create because he has a child or children with someone else he has to support - it's part of why I think blended families aren’t generally a good idea
Even if his children are grown and self-sufficient there is still a risk that a woman might become a bang maid grandma. There was a story on a FB childfree group about a childfree woman who dated a man whose children were adults and they had their own children. His adult son would come for a visit with his young child and they stay for hours. Both men (woman's partner and his son) were hoping that she would take care of the child!
A friend of mine at the university started dating a guy who had three children from two different women. While we were going through exams, she had to take care of his children and ultimately didn't write them. She had to leave school, but is still with him.
When she told him the baby had something in his mouth, you could literally see the "dad" not react and hope that the problem would just get "fixed" once and for all.
I tried 2 relationships with single dad's before. Even the one whose kid was already grown and in the military was using me to financially benefit his kid.
Exactly. I think that all the problems women have with stepchildren have to do with men's entitlement and main character syndrome. Even when the child is outside of the home, he will still go out of his way to make his child your problem. Just like they do with their parents, etc.
How did you allow that? How could that even happen, with a grown kid? Ladies YOU CANNOT GIVE MEN MONEY. That’s what feminism was for. So we didn’t have to give them our money anymore. We could now open our own bank accounts with our money and take out lines of credit and even buy homes. We don’t have to give men money anymore.
I mean yeah . I’m sorry the fact you were dumb enough to even give him money? We’re honestly not all like that as single parents though. And I’m a mom..
@srealone788 Give him money? You think I just gave him money? No.. I was dumb enough to be fully committed to building an empire with him, when I thought we were it, that he revealed, later, he had no intention of giving me credit for.. Oh, and I had 2 babies with him, too, who he was no daddy to. I'm a single mom. Wow.
@@jsChelimo Never even met his adult son. That kid wanted nothing to do with him, I noticed, after encouraging my ex to try to talk with him, cause he seemed to miss him. He hadn't seen his son, since the kid was 11 and blamed his mom. Apparently, I'm not the only woman who thought this man was great enough to do the full thing with, but ended up having to ghost because of his true face being shown much later. In the 3rd year I was with him, his own brother ghosted him, because he wasn't paying him or giving him any other benefit for working with us. I happened to see his texts to his brother, which made me realize he's a narcissist.
Melanie Hamlet has teached me so much! Also the term hobosexual even if she wasn’t the first to come up with it, I definitely attribute it to her, she gives the best examples. You are so wise as well! TY for helping us understand these dynamics better, I consider this teachings as self defense classes.
I've been my son's primary parent since birth but there is nothing I do that my wife can't or won't do. The worst lesbian mom I've ever seen is better than most single dads.
Yes 👏 thank you for telling the baby mothers side bc my thoughts exactly! She’s going through a lot already and guaranteed! He was adding to the stress.
Yeppppp… I don’t know if I wrote and since deleted this, but my kids’s dad did this. When he checked out of our relationship he must have gotten on Facebook (mind you this was back in like 2011/2012.) I don’t know if he did this while we were together or after we split up, but a few months later he had a girl we went to HS with moved into our house. They connected on Facebook. Once I found out I told him I didn’t want any woman around our kids.. typical stuff. Fast forward he ended up breaking up with her because she started talking about marriage and started buying wedding books. Mind you she thought she hit the jack pot. We had a very nice home. She was a teacher so it wasn’t like she was broke, but she saw the house and I’m sure he could have been future faking her but that was it. He told me that out of his own mouth about her talking about weddings and seeing the magazines all over the house and he was done. He also told me out of his own mouth he can’t be alone. They didn’t even last long.. 6 months at the most. So she was just a place holder and a babysitter when he had the kids (no hate.) It gets worse. We started taking things slow and I’m thinking we’re gonna get back together. Little do I know he’s messing with another YOUNG lady behind my back ( WHOLE OTHER CRAZY ASS STORY.) He’s sleeping with me, dating her, telling our young daughter who is like 7 at the time to not tell me, and she doesn’t. I ended up finding out one day and of course my earth is shattered. I’m sure the young lady (now his wife) didn’t know he was sleeping with me. I’m PISSED! Anyway his (future wife) who is like 19 ends up getting pregnant. He lets me know and I’m like WOWWW our relationship is like really, really over now. So I’m sure her parents forced them to get married (she even went to a PRIVATE SCHOOL.) it’s like 12 years later now and 3 kids later between them two, they’re still married, but throughout most of their marriage he’s texting me telling he still loves me.. BLAH, BLAH, BLAH. Just today my 12 year old son and I were talking and he was just telling me how ANNOYING they are (we share split custody) and he hates going over there cause they argue all the time. Then they end up getting yelled at cause after they end up fighting then they’re frustrated so they take it out on the kids. His wife is now in her 30’s but her young 20’s she got pregnant back to back then got pregnant again her late 20’s. So she takes care of 5 kids. My daughter is 18 almost 19 now, but she obviously had to take her and my son to school on their weeks and pick them up.. back when they were younger, in addition to their two young kids and feed them and take care of their kids, clean the house, do the laundry, cook you know... everything us woman do. Everything fell on her!!!!!! He even asked me back in 2020 if he divorced her and we got back together if I would take care of their kids.. I was like HELLLL NO!!! Even at that time he was making BIG MONEYYYY.. and if did this I could have stayed at home (like she does) and take care of them like she does, but that sounded like a nightmare.. they were still like 2 and 3. I got so used to my freedom and my kids were older in 2020 my son was 7/8 and my daughter was like 13/14. I did not feel like doing the toddler age all over again. So ladies all that to say.. you may get the wedding ring but you’ll also get to be a full time babysitter, chauffeur, maid, seggs slave, OR you’ll be a placeholder rebound doing all those things, AND he’s still gonna be messaging his other baby momma. I have all the texts to prove it!!!! Girl I could email you all the texts and you could make a whole other second video on it.. it’s like a damn soap opera. I could even tell you how he manipulated me into having our son.. I was so DUMB… I mean don’t get me wrong I love our son to death, but I was just happy with our little family at the time. Our daughter was 5 and he started saying how he wanted another child because he didn’t want her to be an only child and grow up to be “weird.” Then he threatened to leave me because I didn’t want another kid.. he said well I don’t really see the point in us continuing to be together if you don’t want anymore kids. I was like 😧… and I just “LOVED HIM SO MUCH” so I was like ok if I get pregnant I get pregnant… I ended up getting pregnant, having our son, only for a year later us splitting up and the story goes back to the very top.. where he started dating the placeholder rebound. The irony of it all was he kicked the placeholder rebound to the curb because she wanted to get married only for a year later or so him getting the 19 year pregnant and her parents forcing them to get married… SMH! I even told him if you would have just kept your 🍆 in your pants you could be living your life. You’d only have two kids… they’re older.. you could be living in a fancy, luxury apartment downtown, traveling, being a playboy, you’d be rich as hell, but no.. now he has 5 kids and most of the responsibilities fall on HER because she’s a stay at home wife.
3:08 the mother needs to twke this to court and get her child away from this guy. He doesnt want to parent and is a danger to that child and it is women like this girlfriend that keep them from experiencing consequences
The couple in the beginning did a skit where they were brother and sister and he was trying to get with his sister. They always do ridiculous skits like this
Are you sure? There are men out there who try and get with their sister, the baby that comes out of it has flippers and fins between their toes, it's like a reverse merman with the fish part up and the human part down
Let me tell y’all something. I’m over 50 years old . Was a single mother. Men that become single fathers and have a child. From the age of newborn to 5 years old. Let me tell y’all. That this is the most scary and horrific situation in our society. Bc that means that the mother abandoned her baby with the father. And trust me , these men do not want . To raise their children only without help. A lot of these men . Will leave the baby with his mother to raise while he “ WORKS” = low key looking for baby mama # 2. Or getting his sister or a female cousin to care for the baby for him. Do y’all know what will happen if all over subben. Single fathers with babies start to pop up everywhere? That will be the most dangerous time for babies. Imagine giving men babies . And just let them take them home . And these men care for of their own children. A lot of babies will be &illed and graped. The only real reson why most of us are alive today. Is bc of women who kept us fed and alive. There have been babies that have been found in garbage cans, fed to dogs, sold, &illed and found in luggage in the middle of a forest , buried in a shollow grave or put in a deep freezer. And most of the people that have done these disgusting and terrible things . Even to their on children are men . Some men are incapable of raising and caring for their children. And this is the result of thousands of years of the patriarch. Men have been conditioned for years . That it is so hard for them to think , react and open their minds to assimilate changes in our society. We women have always been treated as second class citizens and sometimes even worse. So we women already have learned to think outside the box and we adapt better to changes. Rather we like it or not , we do our best we can do especially for children. A lot of single fathers go back to dating . So they can find a free babysitter for their kids.
And to think, early civilizations started off as a matriarchy where women had full control and the freedom to pick and choose a mate. Women have always seen children as the future and have protected them fiercely to ensure their survival. [Redacted] have not evolved to look passed their own selfish, self-absorbed needs. Women are on a whole other wavelength.
Humans are the apex predators of this planet, and no other apex predators have their males involved in raising their progeny. Look at bears fir the example-mama bear feeds and teaches the cubs to hunt for 5 years all by herself, because the male bears would eat the cubs and her if they can catch them. The lionesses run the pride and keep very few males around, and if they’re not happy with a male, they’ll just gang up together and eat him. Humans aren’t swans; we’re not supposed to mate for life. Our males are INCAPABLE of doing what they’re asked to do in patriarchy.
The country with the highest happiness rates is also the only country where the dads spend more time with the kids than moms. It’s more how men are raised in this society.
@toscadonna yes. We evolved where women took care of children together while men hunted and left us mostly alone together. We also had our father's, brothers, and male relatives close by, we were not left undefended alone with strange men. Today's society is dangerous and isolating for women. And I argue that men cannot provide alone and therefore without the help of other men to make the work easier they turn to the exploitation of women and children in order to falsely create an illusion of being protectors and providers. Why? Because without other men they struggle, but they can't let a woman know that because if a woman finds out SHE CAN DO ALL BAD BY HERSELF, that turns her against the man and revoked his access to her womb! That's all they're ever really mad about
All you gotta do is help me with a baby and cook for us…. CHILD!!! The audacity!! 😂😂😂😂 oh nah, that’s why it annoyed me when my friend said I should date guys with kids 😅 UM NO MAM. I got no baggage. I deserve at least the same. :\
I’m pretty sure my ex is trying to do this lol he only asks to face time the kids when he has “company” to hear him sound like a “good dad” bwahaha yikes…
Single mom here. Please, ladies, stay away from our exes when they're with our children (at any age). You can have him when the kids come back to us, their mothers. Thank you and good luck!
i thought she was referring to men who held complete custody of their children,, a man who watches his kids every other weekend is an entirely different conversation i hope your message isnt coming from a place of competition to keep access to a man you refer to as an EX partner ! thats pick me behavior babygirl!
@@whimmii Ha! Oh, god, no! Girl, if I wanted that man, I'd still be married to him. My concern is for my daughter. I don't want her to form a bond with someone who could disappear if the relationship doesn't work out. She'd be crushed. Also, dads should spend the limited time they have with their children....with their children. Not dad plus his date. I couldn't care less what he does with the other 80% of his week.
@@grittyinpink16 i understand entirely where youre coming from then! as someone raised by a single mother and other women, it was jarring to see people enter and leave their lives! so i see your point! thanks for explaining it! 🥺💕
Wow, You are really good at this. Binging your content. So glad I subscribed. Thank you for your insightful & direct videos that I can easily share w the smart young girls in my circle who just don’t have the experience w assholes yet🙏let’s keep it that way
I was 23 yrs old with no children. I met a guy we started dating he was 30 yrs old. He had a child that was 10 months old at the time. He and i were dating for 3 months when he brought her over to meet me. It was in the middle of winter, so he said he had to make a run but didn't want to take her back out into the cold. It was 12 noon when he left.
He didn't return for her until 3:00 a.m. the next day. I cussed him out and made him get her dressed and get out of my house. He told everyone i put him and his child out in the cold. However, he never told them the first day i met his daughter he dumped her off on me as if i was a babysitter and failed to return for her until 3:00 a.m. the next day.
God damn. If men could get pregnant, they wouldn’t be so stupid. That’s just facts.
I mean that is irresponsible parenting.. your first time meeting and he didn’t bother to communicate? But not everyone is a bad parent like that. I could never with my children..
@@srealone788 being a irresponsible parent and a bad parent is two different things. I don’t know what time you have on your hands miss lady, but I see in these comment section you are trolling and you not being honest about being a mother, hit dogs holler real loud.
@@Camillyahreal excuse me? My children are older now and it was late at night on a Saturday. Time on my hands? There’s hardly much of a difference between irresponsible and bad parenting. What good parent do you know? Drops their baby off with someone they just met? For over 24 hours? Why are you defending that loser? I’m not trolling. I’m speaking my mind. As much as the next person here is entitled to. If you have a problem with that? Clearly you do. Why should I care? You can speak your mind just as freely. Don’t make you right though. Ain’t you the person that only has one ☝🏼 child. I’ve raised. Supported and cared for 4! Their whole lives!!! Step back!
@@Camillyahreal you trying to defend the same loser? You were just crying about in the comments. For everyone else to stay away from. Are you okay?
He's not even tryna hide it. I hope she leaves him to raise his lil bundle of joy on his own.
A bit sad for the kids like this, no one deserves to be trapped by irresponsible man, but he should've kept it in his pants in the first place if he can't make sure his LeGaCy survives and continues in peace and health. These baby daddies need a reckoning to see what the parent title entails though, so maybe they'll ask for babies as if they're puppies you can drop at the shelter once bored a lot less.
Factz. Every time she posts a video of him, he's doing something wrong. Idk how many red flags she needs
Not “bundle of joy” 😂😂😂😂😂😂
@@thesovereignwoman Yep😂😂
It’s fake. I understand what they tried to show though. But it’s obviously fake and they did it for content.
“You just gonna leave me here with the baby?“
That's YOUR baby bruh! 😂😂😂
The audacity!!!
@@kylaarmstrong-benjamin8066 yes I will. It has happened before, you will get used to it eventually
Utterl clown shit. But when we call it out its "MmmISAndRrrry"
Ugh, I have a friend who only dates single Dads and this is her experience to a tee; they drag the kids to even first dates, she sees it as 'wow, they really trust me and take me seriously for a future', but I think they are just too cheap to pay for a babysitter.
That was my experience once. It was the second date and without notice or explanation he brought both of his kids. Didn't return any calls after that. At the time I was in my 20s and had no interest in being a babysitter/support parent. I raised my 3 younger siblings because my parents wouldn't do it themselves, I am not doing the same for someone else.
Sicnerlrly hope your friend grows up and stops being so naive; lot of rnen don’t even give a fvck about their own kids - they’re the most likely demographic to UNALIVE their own kids just to ‘punish’ the mother of their children just for wanting to leave them!
These rnen are only doing this because they want a free nanny, not because they “trust her with their kids” - they don’t care about their kids, they just want to dump the responsibility of them onto the nearest woman and don’t care who she is or what she’s like.
It's your friend so you probably know them better than I do, but consider that child care is expensive
Maybe you should date her
@@Educatedunhousedperson that's the guy's personal problem. I would never let him visit it on me. If broke, he should save his pennies for his kiddos, rather than spending on dates, which are not essential to survival. 'Dating' is how he got into the situation in the first place, prioritizing the dumbstick over duties and responsibilities, like responsibly keeping it wrapped in its packaging.
I once had a flatmate who only revealed he had a 5-year-old child after moving in. His child would visit every two weeks. When he realized I wouldn’t take care of his son, he attempted to guilt-trip me by saying, "You have no nurturing skills and you don’t like children.
His concept of parenting involved leaving his son to watch TV or taking him to the park where other kids and women were present, who he assumed would babysit for him by proxy.
He thought he was a great dad btw
They think they are insulting us by telling us we are not suckers that work for free😂
His words wouldn't guilt-trip me. He would just have made a very good observation :D
A coworker warned me about this when I first started dating my last boyfriend. Smh, wish I’d listened. I just thought “oh, I won’t have to have my own. I can just help him raise his and we’ll be a nice peaceful family”. Nope! I was an unpaid janitor/governess/wrangler/chef and I had absolutely no authority and barely got any time with him once they all felt comfortable with the kids being left alone with me for long stretches. It felt like the twilight zone. Blood pressure skyrocketed out of nowhere. Money was always hemorrhaging from my account. Barely got any sleep.
@@remnant1018 and you didn’t even get to experience what being an actual mother to your own blood child is like, which can be a very different & beautiful experience (not that it’s not difficult & all the things, but the connection to the child is way different). Sorry that happened to you
I am male. I agree. No one should date anyone with small children. It is a hassle. It is too much work. It is often thankless. Many times folks are ungrateful. Do not do it.
I agree with you 💯% and I'm a woman.😊😊😊😊
I married a dude with young kids 5 years ago worst choice ever. In 2021 he wanted me to quit my job to take care of his children for him during the summer...I said no but compromised and cut my hours at work for him to help out, but that wasnt enough...and suprise next summer same argument...following summer same argument....and now we're getting divorced...and he's already searching for a new babysitter....everyone needs to be careful about this....especially if you are childless.
If you are child free, you shouldn’t be dating a man with kids at all. There is nothing in it for you.
I matched a dude on a dating site and we chatted for a few weeks. Then swapped numbers and video called.
He finally told me he has two ex wives both woth his children. He further said, women with children should never date. I immediately clocked he was doing very little to support his ex wives and was looking for yet another woman to give children.
BLOCKED.
you’re supposed to trick him into spending money before you block. lol
Smart you. Good you shared. Similar story. Tried to play the victim in women have tricked him and he told me on the first date „our genes together would be amazing“
This phrases is the sign to block.
I still kept dating 3 weeks. Because we had a lot of talking BUT I always need to listen up front and block not to invest time because with spending time you bond
That’s why close your legs because humans bond over sex or spending time together
Direct block
I felt always pitty for men and always self sacrificed as women are brainwashed into this. Never again.
Please be selfish and be obsessed with yourself and build healthy friendships relationships with your family friends neighbours community to have a social life and do hobbies
It is a red flag when he says that married women shouldn't date. Usually they are projecting. What is he doing to those children that he would even say that?
Don't date a guy who talks like that even if he has no kids.
Did he say, "that's what you here for!"? That's crazy
In my youth, I've had men with fresh out of the womb babies trying to get with my single ass.
“That’s what you’re here for!” He didn’t even try to hide it holy shit. No, she’s not here to be a babysitter or a second mom.
And yet this dingbat will stay.
There is almost nothing a man can do or admit to that will make these types of women leave.
Or even DATE SOMEONE ELSE AT THE SAME TIME.
They’re just broken.
@@MsNatiBug they are right to be scared of leaving tho, not their fault that crazy, bad men stalk, harass, take "revenge" on their exes just for leaving or trying to leave the abuse.
Let's not victim blame.
It’s usually his mom who ends up raising the baby. The idea of a man with a baby going out and picking up a woman to take care of his baby for free is just so creepy. These men must have absolutely no family, because I guarantee he would dump that baby on his mother or sister first.
Men LOVE! making babies, BUT taking care of them, not that much
@@Tess-k4o they forget that detail when they say "when we will have artificial uteruses, we will not need women anymore". Oh boy what a threat... 🤣🤣🤣🤣🤣🤣🤣🤣🤣
That must be so hard , getting attached to a sweet young child like that just to have to walk away for your own good. Its the worst, these fathers don't even care
I ended up my last relationship about a year ago when I started rescuing cats because the dude literally was jelaous and pissed that I had to take care of little kittens. He has acting out, like a child, because I was paying attention to vulnerable creatures instead of his grown ass. I was sterilizing feral cats and this dude was starting drama because he "didn't like" to use protection. I'm so grateful that he ghosted me because at least he wasn't a stalker (woman math). I ended up getting a tube ligation for myself :) and my cats are happy and healthy, thank you.
Wow, smh! You dodged a bullet. He was trying to spread disease for sure. Yuck, mails are so digusting.
I've come to realize that men who don't like to use protection are not protectors in the slightest. Why wouldn't you want to protect a woman's future as well as your own by making sure she doesn't get pregnant. We won't even talk about the possibility of stds.
No matter how small _or_ large his kids are, they are *his!*
RUN AWAY, LADIES!
Feel like the safest option is only if all his kids are grown adults who can care for themselves. But even then he’ll still find a way to make you care for them
@ _Plus_ there’s too many instances of Women reporting the man dying and then his grown kids descend upon *Her house,* trying to lay hands to *Her belongings,* claiming “Dis iz ma Daddy stuff! You kilt ma Daddy!…”
Nevermind he probably saw them 3 times their whole lives.😒😒😒 Won’t stop them from trying to pick the Woman who he loved w/ clean! #IssaNO 🙅🏾♀️🙅🏾♀️🙅🏾♀️
These guys fight for custody so they don't have to pay child support. Then they date anyone who will be the caregiver. Absolutely 💯
Yes!
It’s a red flag whenever a father or mother of a very young child is trying to date while having primary custody. How do they have the time, the energy, and the emotional capacity to do both properly? Answer: They’re not focusing on being a parent, and probably have someone else doing a lot of the childcare.
Young children do not benefit from having new adults coming in and out of their life. And they do not benefit from their parent being distracted, splitting their time and energy between them and their love life.
Exactly
The first video is so scary because not letting move it's a huge red flag. One of my exes got extreme on a date because I wanted to go to my own house and he wanted me to come back to his place. It was in a public place, a lot of people around, nobody did anything. If you date man, pls test their "no" reactions from the start.
Definitely! Not letting someone leave, blocking their exit like that, it's a crime where i live. The way my cortisol spiked when I saw him block the door after she merely informed him that she wasn't spending the night! Several dudes have done this to me. It's in so many "romantic" films, ugh.
I left baby daddy when my daughter was 10 months old (she's 30 now) and never once looked for a step daddy. He however, replaced me with a new woman 30 days after our break up. This intelligent woman never stopped to consider why I left to be a single mom to an infant rather than be with him. She married him and found out.
😂😂 she should have read the Yelp review
I believe they feel entitled because there are many women who accepted that role for years. Meanwhile women with small children run the risk of exposing their kids to predators.
Despite my mom teaching me never to date a man with kids, I did for a couple of months not fully realizing he did, and it came out eventually not only that he had two kids but also that he did NOT have shared custody or visitation rights. The story basically told itself, all I had to do was put one and one together and once I figured it out I sprinted in the other direction 😂
This happened to my friend! They're e v e r y w h e r e .
I told my ex I would support him and his family if he wanted to do 50/50 with his babies mother... I Said SUPPORT not raise!!!! His dad and sisters who none of them work wanted me to do all the child care.... I work and have my own children. There's no fucking way.
Also, don't listen to him speak negatively about the mother because he's lying to make himself look better.
See this one I agree with.. that’s always a red flag 🚩
Any woman they speak ill of. They can speak just as bad about you. Parent or not..
I am childfree and dont date fathers. No matter how old the kids are, even if there adults.
@@st-dm2lu I have witnessed adult children ruin great relationships because they can't accept the fact that their mother or father found a companion.
A male who’s left their child’s mother is a HUGE red flag. No woman in her right mind breaks up with a good man when she’s pregnant or has young children. So you’re either dealing with an abewsive nam (which is the case 99% of the time), or he’s truly got a crazy ex (which means he prefers the excitement of a crazy woman and not you); neither of these is a green flag situation for you.
🎯
💯
Such a great point
Perfectly described
Excellent observation... Should be a pinned comment.
Okay, this also applies to men with kids if any ages, even adult ones. They expect the stepmom or grand mom to help out their adult step kids with money, labour and childcare. It's disgusting.
I was thinking about that the whole time as well.
@@Tulipsaki 💯💯💯. The ones with older kids are also bad
Dear young men and women, please know that from the moment you have children, they will "steal"/share the limelight with your partner FOREVER, not only when they're toddlers.
I would amend the title to “don’t date men with children”
Full stop.
Please show this video to all the women in your life and family.
I am utterly shocked at the amount of women who are playing mom to children that are not even their's.
My baby's father left me to be with his side piece and the girl played step mom to our child so he could keep his freedom and reduce his child support payment.
After marrying her and giving her 2 children he thanked her by leaving her for a much younger side piece he met through a friend.
Don't play step mother to a mails children because you are wasting your precious time and you could be using that precious time on other things.
Yup! They're always looking for the next 'best thing'. More women need to embrace the single CF life, because I promise you your life will be much happier and way more peaceful when you're not stuck playing step mom for a m's kids.
I'm worried for his child. I suspect that deep down that woman knows he's trash... So she stuck around out of concern for his kid.
This is why I'm staying far away from single fathers. I would try to stay for the kids' sake. They know that and use it to keep you with them. CPS exists if the child is unsafe with him, staying only enables more bad behavior from the man.
I have one kid and still won't date males with children. I'm a single mom and I know how draining it can be, he has time to entertain me but not his kids plus I know he is not helping the mom by being around me.
Same. I thought I’m weird. I have one who’s 12. I refuse men with small kids or men with tons of kids with different women.
It depends, but im also like why isnt he with the mom, now i came from a dv situation, but im verry loyal at heart, and dont think i want to be with a man Who cant work through issues, but then that would mean his other relationship would also need to be toxic for it to make sense to me why he left, but then i dont want to deal with other peoples toxic exes, on top of that he could be toxic himself and caused the breakup, or he has unhealed trauma....
Honestly im already like im not gonna date anyone anyways until 1 im healed myself, 2 i find someone thats absolutely worth it
based on ur statement i assume u have no problem with childless men who dont date single mom.
@@Misandrist777 💯💯💯. I have kids and I don't date single dads. I'm not looking for a free babysitter like they are.
Women get played because we're always trying to be 'fair' when the world isn't fair to us.
It's just not the same and I don't know why people pretend it is.
"that's what you're here for" yikes bro
That man either took that baby to his mother's/sister's house or called some other silly woman to come over and take care of the baby. I guarantee he did not spend the night alone with that baby.
You already know
Elon Musk did this to Tallulah. He met her at a bar, slept with her, professed his love, flew her to the US, and she raised his 5 boys.
Let's not forget that during his first marriage, after losing his first baby, he demanded IVF, and his wife then had twin boys, then triplet boys.
He did it with all his baby mamas, Tallulah married him twice for the money,
@@Alexcatchh Men created capitalism to trap women. Thank god for the 4B Movement.
@@marys2406 well technically men are s3xual commies. The state provides men with wifes by using religions and laws, so that women have to marry in order to eat and have a roof over their heads. If women had free choice and a way to earn money, women reject most men. So I agree with your point, but really all men are s3xually on the left. They do NOT want to compete for women, but force women to marry them.
That guy is crazy. No amount of money in the world could convince me to have a kid with him.
It's interesting how in fairy tales, the step mom is always portrayed as evil. It's propaganda to make step moms feel like they have break their backs caring for their step children, or they're evil. There was a much higher demand for step moms because lots of women died in childbirth. It all makes sense.
No. Evil stepmothers are just that. Mine is evil, I know plenty of evil ones and I didn't need Disney to define it. Women are not good at playing second fiddle to anyone and don't want to share resources with children she did not birth. We women are not this mythical creatures you want to believe in 😂 we are humans and are just as frail as males. We are different in some ways but not all.
@@shiina29 stepmoms are expected to do everything and they are still hated. None of it is ever enough.
Stepdads are considered saintly for just existing in the same house as their stepkids. They don't even have to do anything.
If he's not abusing them, he's automatically an angel 😇.
My friend was in a similar situation. She was dating a guy and the moment she moved in with him he moved his two young sons in and she had to take care of them. She was blindsided and was pissed so she stayed. He also told her she had to appear her best when they were out in public. I put that nicely, he didn’t. He also told her that the house was his and she didn’t have rights to anything. Just wild!!!
So glad she's not in that anymore. 🙏
that is so sad for the bio mom. My ex husband tried to do the same, but I had a lawyer with 4 decades of experience and she swept the floor with them, luckily. So sad there's women out there, like your friend, who believe their lies and are willing to support a man that takes his kids away from the love and safety of their bio mom, out of spite. They only get new supply so that a new woman is there to do everything he wont do for his own kids.
Oh, man.... a few years ago, I was semi-active on dating sites and my profile said I didn't want to date someone with kids.
One guy sent me a long, nasty, ranting message about how I was such a huge B* for not wanting to date people with children.
I have been single and celibate for many years and deleted all my apps. I'm done.
👏🏾👏🏾👏🏾
I never wanted kids, ain't no way I would be bothered with a single father.😂
I choose willingly to die alone with like 100 cats.😂
I matched with a guy on an online dating site. We were chatting online. We had not even gone on a first date when he asked if I could pick up his 4 yo from daycare to take along on our first date. I like kids but NOPE!
Good for you, that is actually crazy
@@GwenevereRuthalmost as crazy as the guy who wanted me to “at least consider” carrying his child. I’m childfree due to medical issues… he said everyone has bad genes so I should still have his kid. We had only been messaging for a day. 💀
The daycare probably wouldn't have let you have it. He was testing you.
“That’s what you’re here for.” ?????
EXCUSE ME!! Omfg!!!
Unbelievable
It's the audacity for me!
This is an example of what you mean by "men are calculating".
Single dads are a NO! Don’t do it childfree women.
i started talking to a guy ( age 21) and I quickly learned he had 2 kids under the age of 5 with his "crazy" ex. He literally was outlining that he expected any woman that came into his life needed to learn to co parent with his children's mother (even though as he said she's a cheater, a liar, and crazy) and basically would be last in his priorities. I found it wild because I don't have any of that going on in my life. And he has some nerve to think that someone should put up with less than they deserve and expect her to invest her time and energy into his messy life.
Most men have been raised believing they're the main character and so don't respect women's time and energy.
And that's exactly why nem with small children, or even single CF nem get so mad whenever single CF women refuse to date them. They feel so entitled to a woman's free labour and expect her to take over their paternal duties. The nam in this video was already showing warning signs when his gf was trying to leave. Yeah, no. It's time to run, girl! 🏃🏾♀️
Met a man at my job. We had a good convo and vibed well. He asked me out and told me that he wanted to cook for me. I was ready for him to cook me dinner like he promised until he told me that he has 6 children..... 🤮🤮🤮
The fact that he probably thinks she's asking him if she can go. She's telling you she is going because you don't own her! This man is confused about who he is and how much power he actually holds, he's also confused about his own responsibilities.
He straight up told her she was staying and go make them food like she has no choice. I hope she's smart enough to leave permanently.
I realized that women can't actually get up and leave in these situations, men will not let you leave
I have been waiting for a video like this since they always want to shame single mothers ( who stayed and took care of the child they helped make) and are sooooooo quiet about the part where there’s a dad who completely forfeit on his responsibilities.
It’s the lack of accountability or responsibility from him that’s crazy.
His kid is choking on something and he's trying to blame and threaten unrelated third party who did not sign up for some nanny contract from what we can hear. The entitlement for free babying of him and the kid is insane.
And the entitlement.. like she owes you NOTHING.. good god..
I learned this the hard way while dating a man with 3 children. Within a couple months he had me taking care of him and his kids at my home for the weekends he had them. And he didn't have them often. Which was another red flag. He even got me to help him out new grass in his backyard, with hard labor, bc "I had the experience and knew how to do it". But yeah, hell naw don't ever do that shit. Also, if he's not with a woman he JUST had a kid with, TF he supposed to do for me? 🤷🏾♀️
Sidenote: I do miss his mom. She was so sweet and I enjoyed her company. But not enough to endure him.
My rule for dating men with kids years ago, was their kids had to be old enough to drive and were able to take care of themselves. I'm good with kids, but I had no desire to "babysit" someone else's.
I didn't have the same rule for women I dated, because single moms rarely put those type of expectations on me. They were much better at creating boundaries for themselves and their children, which to me always made them the better parent in general.
But single fathers kind of want us to "take over" and meet their kids too soon. They know if we do, we may get emotionally attached to them and then want to help out when the kids are with dad.
I experienced that a few times with single dads who had young kids, so then I implemented the "kids must be old enough to drive" rule.
That actually worked pretty well, so then I didn't feel guilty if I was dating a man who had older kids, as if I needed to swoop in and help out. So many women feel obligated to, so we need to set better boundaries for ourselves.
I LOVE Melanie and Bougie and you! the holy trinity of male accountability!
Can confirm, sadly I have personally learned this lesson the hard way
Ive been a step mother. It is the worst. The worst.
My sister got married, raised his kids, got divorced, married another guy, and is raising his kids. 🤦♀️
"Cook for us" 😂😂
😮😮😮 he actually said that
"Boy! 😒" 😂
He should be cooking for HER if he expects her to watch his kid!
Like what idiot can't cook 😂😂😂
@@Glow-f8ac nope, call me again when you hire a cook, since you be are not capable of cooking. 😁😁😁
Been there, done that! Burned the postcard and never going back again.
The only reason he doesnt give his child to the mother is vecause he dont want to pay child support
Also it's easy to walk away from their kids because they can't get anything from the kids, they realize they are the ones who have to give give give to the kids they don't want to give anything! To their kids
Thanks for reminding me how awesome all the men in my life are. Sorry for everyone who has men that act like this in their lives..
To have that level of audacity is just crazy.🤯
I don't believe all single dads view their kids as competition. I'm just not going to be the free babysitter anymore 🤷 Every single dad I've dated wants a maid, mother, free babysitter, while they refuse to marry (blaming "baby mamma" for that instead of taking accountability), and they get to go out and socialize and flirt with whoever they want. Most of the time their kid(s) insufferable brats who run back to their mom saying what an awful stepmom you are for asking them to clean their room or help with chores anyways. Nope. No more!
Wow... WTF 😒😢😮. I hope she broke up with him!!
So so so so true!!! I left my ex husband when my child was a BABY!!! to GTFO ASAP, I left him everything so the divorce would OVER in 2 months. He got the house, the car, etc. all I wanted was freedom. The second I left, his new GF was the one taking care of the baby duing his parenting time, AND, she paid the child support, took over the house payments fixed up the house, ( since I didnt, i knew I was leaving) !! And then my ex did the kudegra, of up and selling the house for a LOSS, just to stalk me in the new state I had moved to. She called me 10 years later, PISSED OFF wanting me to testify at a trial, but I didnt get involved.
When I was dating, I dated men with children, since I had a young child, but I wouldnt recommend. Men with children complain that women expect men to accept their children, but get annoyed when women do not date men with young children. Well thats easy, its because women DO EVERYTHING. Dating a man with kids, means, you are now taking care of HIS kids, AND YOURS! I ended up marrying someone that didnt have kids, thank god. He adopted my child, when my ex's girlfriends child support payments stopped.
So you became the same kind of leech you condemn your ex for being.
Also, TF is a "kudegra"?
@@christopherbrown5409women are the ones who end up taking care of the children, regardless of who the children’s bio parent is. so if she’s taking care of her own child, how does that make her like a man/leech who expects a woman to take care of his kid so he doesn’t have to?
I think it's supposed to be "coup de grâce?" People frequently mispronounce it in English.@@christopherbrown5409
Videos like this make me glad i wasn’t “chosen” for step motherhood by my first boyfriend. My high school boyfriend had a 5 year old daughter. I proposed to him senior year. He turned me down! Now i see it as a blessing in disguise. King baby is very true but honestly that term applies moreso to the childless men i dated who duped me into thinking they wanted to me dads but they actually wanted me to mother THEM. My ex who had a daughter wasn’t necessarily a king baby - but he was an adult who was into teenagers which is disgusting af.
Omg, I’m appalled. And the baby was choking while he was in the room 😭
I think the only reason a woman should date a man with children is if all of his children are grown and self-sufficient and there are literally no decent childless men around her.
Sorry but I think being a stepparent is such a shit deal for women we shouldn't even try to be a part of a broken family situation. Plus, like OP said, if a man can't keep the woman he got pregnant, 99% of the time it's because he was probably a bad partner and/or father. Fix your relationship with your baby mama or be single and focus on your kid for the next 18 years.
This right here
He’s still in debt to the last women who gave him a child. Go be with your family sir!👋🏽
Plus he is not financially able to create another family because he has to pay already so the next women don’t have any benefits nothing , no time and money. No quality.
@@Alicewunderimlandyup, one of the many reasons childless women shouldn’t get involved with single dads, his focus will never be 100% on you and the family you create because he has a child or children with someone else he has to support - it's part of why I think blended families aren’t generally a good idea
Even if his children are grown and self-sufficient there is still a risk that a woman might become a bang maid grandma. There was a story on a FB childfree group about a childfree woman who dated a man whose children were adults and they had their own children. His adult son would come for a visit with his young child and they stay for hours. Both men (woman's partner and his son) were hoping that she would take care of the child!
Thanks for giving Mel Hamlet a shout-out! Her amazing work is on UA-cam and patreon
Book recommendation: 'Eve: how the female body drove 200 million years of human evolution' by Cat Bohannon. She spent 10 years researching this book.
Thanks for the recommendation!
@@b1njjj95 You're welcome
A friend of mine at the university started dating a guy who had three children from two different women. While we were going through exams, she had to take care of his children and ultimately didn't write them. She had to leave school, but is still with him.
She neither had a plan for her own life nor for university. She was getting into debt just because
🤡
😳
A baby daddy several times over is a red flag. Avoid.
@@dearbrave4183 she was very much interested. Before he entered her life, she would study for hours and put a lot of effort.
When she told him the baby had something in his mouth, you could literally see the "dad" not react and hope that the problem would just get "fixed" once and for all.
Oh shit!!! You right 😱
I tried 2 relationships with single dad's before. Even the one whose kid was already grown and in the military was using me to financially benefit his kid.
Exactly. I think that all the problems women have with stepchildren have to do with men's entitlement and main character syndrome. Even when the child is outside of the home, he will still go out of his way to make his child your problem. Just like they do with their parents, etc.
How did you allow that? How could that even happen, with a grown kid?
Ladies YOU CANNOT GIVE MEN MONEY.
That’s what feminism was for. So we didn’t have to give them our money anymore. We could now open our own bank accounts with our money and take out lines of credit and even buy homes.
We don’t have to give men money anymore.
I mean yeah . I’m sorry the fact you were dumb enough to even give him money? We’re honestly not all like that as single parents though. And I’m a mom..
@srealone788 Give him money? You think I just gave him money? No.. I was dumb enough to be fully committed to building an empire with him, when I thought we were it, that he revealed, later, he had no intention of giving me credit for.. Oh, and I had 2 babies with him, too, who he was no daddy to. I'm a single mom. Wow.
@@jsChelimo Never even met his adult son. That kid wanted nothing to do with him, I noticed, after encouraging my ex to try to talk with him, cause he seemed to miss him. He hadn't seen his son, since the kid was 11 and blamed his mom. Apparently, I'm not the only woman who thought this man was great enough to do the full thing with, but ended up having to ghost because of his true face being shown much later.
In the 3rd year I was with him, his own brother ghosted him, because he wasn't paying him or giving him any other benefit for working with us. I happened to see his texts to his brother, which made me realize he's a narcissist.
Melanie Hamlet has teached me so much! Also the term hobosexual even if she wasn’t the first to come up with it, I definitely attribute it to her, she gives the best examples. You are so wise as well! TY for helping us understand these dynamics better, I consider this teachings as self defense classes.
That video literally disgusted me 😭🤮
“King baby” Melanie Hamllet is so very good at describing the treachery too, love both of your channels!
I will play daddy as a woman for another woman, because she sees me as a person & appreciates me
We'll see how long that lasts. I don't think that's a smart idea. If she stops this behavior be on the lookout for that and run
I've been my son's primary parent since birth but there is nothing I do that my wife can't or won't do. The worst lesbian mom I've ever seen is better than most single dads.
Bedankt
Its honestly not good for the kids either
Thanks for helping women queen heres your crown👑
Yes 👏 thank you for telling the baby mothers side bc my thoughts exactly! She’s going through a lot already and guaranteed! He was adding to the stress.
Yeppppp… I don’t know if I wrote and since deleted this, but my kids’s dad did this. When he checked out of our relationship he must have gotten on Facebook (mind you this was back in like 2011/2012.) I don’t know if he did this while we were together or after we split up, but a few months later he had a girl we went to HS with moved into our house. They connected on Facebook. Once I found out I told him I didn’t want any woman around our kids.. typical stuff. Fast forward he ended up breaking up with her because she started talking about marriage and started buying wedding books. Mind you she thought she hit the jack pot. We had a very nice home. She was a teacher so it wasn’t like she was broke, but she saw the house and I’m sure he could have been future faking her but that was it. He told me that out of his own mouth about her talking about weddings and seeing the magazines all over the house and he was done. He also told me out of his own mouth he can’t be alone. They didn’t even last long.. 6 months at the most. So she was just a place holder and a babysitter when he had the kids (no hate.) It gets worse. We started taking things slow and I’m thinking we’re gonna get back together. Little do I know he’s messing with another YOUNG lady behind my back ( WHOLE OTHER CRAZY ASS STORY.) He’s sleeping with me, dating her, telling our young daughter who is like 7 at the time to not tell me, and she doesn’t. I ended up finding out one day and of course my earth is shattered. I’m sure the young lady (now his wife) didn’t know he was sleeping with me. I’m PISSED! Anyway his (future wife) who is like 19 ends up getting pregnant. He lets me know and I’m like WOWWW our relationship is like really, really over now. So I’m sure her parents forced them to get married (she even went to a PRIVATE SCHOOL.) it’s like 12 years later now and 3 kids later between them two, they’re still married, but throughout most of their marriage he’s texting me telling he still loves me.. BLAH, BLAH, BLAH. Just today my 12 year old son and I were talking and he was just telling me how ANNOYING they are (we share split custody) and he hates going over there cause they argue all the time. Then they end up getting yelled at cause after they end up fighting then they’re frustrated so they take it out on the kids. His wife is now in her 30’s but her young 20’s she got pregnant back to back then got pregnant again her late 20’s. So she takes care of 5 kids. My daughter is 18 almost 19 now, but she obviously had to take her and my son to school on their weeks and pick them up.. back when they were younger, in addition to their two young kids and feed them and take care of their kids, clean the house, do the laundry, cook you know... everything us woman do. Everything fell on her!!!!!! He even asked me back in 2020 if he divorced her and we got back together if I would take care of their kids.. I was like HELLLL NO!!! Even at that time he was making BIG MONEYYYY.. and if did this I could have stayed at home (like she does) and take care of them like she does, but that sounded like a nightmare.. they were still like 2 and 3. I got so used to my freedom and my kids were older in 2020 my son was 7/8 and my daughter was like 13/14. I did not feel like doing the toddler age all over again. So ladies all that to say.. you may get the wedding ring but you’ll also get to be a full time babysitter, chauffeur, maid, seggs slave, OR you’ll be a placeholder rebound doing all those things, AND he’s still gonna be messaging his other baby momma. I have all the texts to prove it!!!! Girl I could email you all the texts and you could make a whole other second video on it.. it’s like a damn soap opera. I could even tell you how he manipulated me into having our son.. I was so DUMB… I mean don’t get me wrong I love our son to death, but I was just happy with our little family at the time. Our daughter was 5 and he started saying how he wanted another child because he didn’t want her to be an only child and grow up to be “weird.” Then he threatened to leave me because I didn’t want another kid.. he said well I don’t really see the point in us continuing to be together if you don’t want anymore kids. I was like 😧… and I just “LOVED HIM SO MUCH” so I was like ok if I get pregnant I get pregnant… I ended up getting pregnant, having our son, only for a year later us splitting up and the story goes back to the very top.. where he started dating the placeholder rebound. The irony of it all was he kicked the placeholder rebound to the curb because she wanted to get married only for a year later or so him getting the 19 year pregnant and her parents forcing them to get married… SMH! I even told him if you would have just kept your 🍆 in your pants you could be living your life. You’d only have two kids… they’re older.. you could be living in a fancy, luxury apartment downtown, traveling, being a playboy, you’d be rich as hell, but no.. now he has 5 kids and most of the responsibilities fall on HER because she’s a stay at home wife.
WOW.. that's some soap opera indeed, girl. I have a soap opera of my own so I feel you. How is your life now?
3:08 the mother needs to twke this to court and get her child away from this guy. He doesnt want to parent and is a danger to that child and it is women like this girlfriend that keep them from experiencing consequences
King Baby just resonates
The GEMS u drop!! 😩😩❤️❤️💪🏾
0:35 she needs to dump him and move on. Get some self esteem girl damn. He sees her as an appliance there to service him and make his life easier
The couple in the beginning did a skit where they were brother and sister and he was trying to get with his sister. They always do ridiculous skits like this
Are you sure?
There are men out there who try and get with their sister, the baby that comes out of it has flippers and fins between their toes, it's like a reverse merman with the fish part up and the human part down
It doesn’t really matter if it is a skit because there are single fathers out there that behave exactly like this
Let me tell y’all something. I’m over 50 years old . Was a single mother. Men that become single fathers and have a child. From the age of newborn to 5 years old. Let me tell y’all. That this is the most scary and horrific situation in our society. Bc that means that the mother abandoned her baby with the father. And trust me , these men do not want . To raise their children only without help. A lot of these men . Will leave the baby with his mother to raise while he “ WORKS” = low key looking for baby mama # 2. Or getting his sister or a female cousin to care for the baby for him. Do y’all know what will happen if all over subben. Single fathers with babies start to pop up everywhere? That will be the most dangerous time for babies. Imagine giving men babies . And just let them take them home . And these men care for of their own children. A lot of babies will be &illed and graped. The only real reson why most of us are alive today. Is bc of women who kept us fed and alive. There have been babies that have been found in garbage cans, fed to dogs, sold, &illed and found in luggage in the middle of a forest , buried in a shollow grave or put in a deep freezer. And most of the people that have done these disgusting and terrible things . Even to their on children are men . Some men are incapable of raising and caring for their children. And this is the result of thousands of years of the patriarch. Men have been conditioned for years . That it is so hard for them to think , react and open their minds to assimilate changes in our society. We women have always been treated as second class citizens and sometimes even worse. So we women already have learned to think outside the box and we adapt better to changes. Rather we like it or not , we do our best we can do especially for children. A lot of single fathers go back to dating . So they can find a free babysitter for their kids.
And to think, early civilizations started off as a matriarchy where women had full control and the freedom to pick and choose a mate. Women have always seen children as the future and have protected them fiercely to ensure their survival. [Redacted] have not evolved to look passed their own selfish, self-absorbed needs. Women are on a whole other wavelength.
Children are not safe alone with most of them. It's very sad.
Humans are the apex predators of this planet, and no other apex predators have their males involved in raising their progeny. Look at bears fir the example-mama bear feeds and teaches the cubs to hunt for 5 years all by herself, because the male bears would eat the cubs and her if they can catch them. The lionesses run the pride and keep very few males around, and if they’re not happy with a male, they’ll just gang up together and eat him. Humans aren’t swans; we’re not supposed to mate for life. Our males are INCAPABLE of doing what they’re asked to do in patriarchy.
The country with the highest happiness rates is also the only country where the dads spend more time with the kids than moms. It’s more how men are raised in this society.
@toscadonna yes. We evolved where women took care of children together while men hunted and left us mostly alone together. We also had our father's, brothers, and male relatives close by, we were not left undefended alone with strange men.
Today's society is dangerous and isolating for women. And I argue that men cannot provide alone and therefore without the help of other men to make the work easier they turn to the exploitation of women and children in order to falsely create an illusion of being protectors and providers. Why? Because without other men they struggle, but they can't let a woman know that because if a woman finds out SHE CAN DO ALL BAD BY HERSELF, that turns her against the man and revoked his access to her womb!
That's all they're ever really mad about
Gets a babysitter so he can go out with the "guys" golfing or Hooters.
And Some men will DARE to be like "oh I want only YOU to care after OUR kid cuz you are the best woman I've ever known and I don't trust STRANGERS"
I also urge not to date old guys with adult kids
😂😂 Why? I love the stories
Under 5, fuckin' dive! 😂😂😂
If the mother is out of town, step tf down! 😂
When the children are little don't get in the middle? 🤷♀️
You are beyond on point.
All you gotta do is help me with a baby and cook for us….
CHILD!!! The audacity!! 😂😂😂😂 oh nah, that’s why it annoyed me when my friend said I should date guys with kids 😅 UM NO MAM. I got no baggage. I deserve at least the same. :\
I really wish some of these were just staged and rage bait 😢 but I know too many of them are real.
I’m pretty sure my ex is trying to do this lol he only asks to face time the kids when he has “company” to hear him sound like a “good dad” bwahaha yikes…
I've been there.... I'm sorry u have to deal with that. 🫂
Thanks for the shout out to Melanie Hamlet! Love her channel
Single mom here. Please, ladies, stay away from our exes when they're with our children (at any age). You can have him when the kids come back to us, their mothers. Thank you and good luck!
Wow! Hope this applies to the single moms.
i thought she was referring to men who held complete custody of their children,, a man who watches his kids every other weekend is an entirely different conversation
i hope your message isnt coming from a place of competition to keep access to a man you refer to as an EX partner ! thats pick me behavior babygirl!
@@whimmiiShe said they can have her ex when the kids are with her, so I don’t think it’s about the guy.
@@whimmii Ha! Oh, god, no! Girl, if I wanted that man, I'd still be married to him. My concern is for my daughter. I don't want her to form a bond with someone who could disappear if the relationship doesn't work out. She'd be crushed. Also, dads should spend the limited time they have with their children....with their children. Not dad plus his date. I couldn't care less what he does with the other 80% of his week.
@@grittyinpink16 i understand entirely where youre coming from then! as someone raised by a single mother and other women, it was jarring to see people enter and leave their lives! so i see your point! thanks for explaining it! 🥺💕
They see every woman as everyone's mama.......
Wow, You are really good at this. Binging your content. So glad I subscribed. Thank you for your insightful & direct videos that I can easily share w the smart young girls in my circle who just don’t have the experience w assholes yet🙏let’s keep it that way