Just wanna say this channel has recently gotten an absurdly high upgrade in terms of production quality. Visually with the new background and updated visuals, sonically with added sound effects and musical queues, and even the content (Dr. K and his talks) seems to be more refined with an increased presentational charisma--for lack of a better word xD. Well done to the whole team!
Nah the background music isn't ambient enough and sounds out of the place, the audio balance is not good either. The background animation is a bit distracting as well.
@@androidbluat background music is fine for an intro. Also I agree that the sound effects could be just a bit quieter, but the rest of the audio balancing is getting into nitpicking territory imo. I don't find the background gradient distracting at all.
This reminds me of how awesome the book 'infinite jest' is. Addiction is one of the main themes and one passage that stuck with me was how sobriety is painful as it allows you to remember the things that made you become an addict in the first place.
Romantic relationships can be an addictive/codependent nightmare. People who can't stay single bounce from one problematic relationship to another to cope.
Yeah it can. But in my experiance, you can help each other to be better. My fiance has problems and i have others. She helps me with my problems and vice versa. And show me a relationship where everything is perfect all the time. This doesn't exist or both don't care about anything. Relationships are work, but they are worth it, if you get the right one.
My ex did the same. Saw things slipping because she was failing to follow through or talk about relationships issues so she left me for another addict.
This is some of the most valuable knowledge for the 21st century and should unironically be taught in schools especially in highschools. insane episode dr. k
I've discovered this along the way. The "you're it" mechanism of addiction. To me, it's the understanding that one is an addict, much more than limiting it to whatever substance or behavior we try to get off of. And, of course, the root cause of needing to cope. Your content is so important, thank you Dr K ❤
This is really interesting and shows that any coping mechanism can become maladaptive if overused.. I always switch between comfort eating and entertainment to relieve anxiety but they are both counter-productive and make my anxiety worse in the long term
I feel like any coping mechanism that is just "consuming" instead of "doing X to eventually get y" ends up being rampantly aggressive to ourselves, since it ends up being a "passive" form of soothing,especially food. Good luck, man
@@arraikcruor6407 i feel like religion can also be categorized under the "coping" term, since i saw many people with real problems try to not solve the problem itself, but jumped aside and soothed and distracted themselves from the actual problem
What's helped me get to sleep (as I've been detoxing from Gabapentin and Suboxone, very difficult to sleep) is meditation. When you lie down to sleep - you want to relax all muscles through your body, one section at a time. Then change your focus ONLY to your breathing, and empty your mind the best you can. Anytime a thought comes up, ignore it and remember your breathing. Focus ONLY on the breathing - and you want your breathing to mimic that of a person who is already asleep. You want to breathe in deeply, hold it for a split second (don't go TOO slowly), let go of the breath (again, for a split second let your lungs stay deflated, not too long), then repeat. You want a steady and slow rhythm. This has helped me more than ANYTHING for trying to sleep through intense shitty drug withdrawal.
Focusing on each section minutely, starting at either you scalp or you toes and working down or up your body, and not allowing any muscle to retighten before concentrating on the next, puts me to sleep w/o fail. For me, starting with my scalp, forehead, then ears, eyelids, cheeks, lips, etc. works better than starting with my toes. I never get much further than my jaw and I’m asleep. The breathing slows down naturally as each set of muscles lets go of tension. If any start to retighten I return my concentration on getting them to let go again. Maybe this is meditation to some. To me it’s just a quiet closing off the lights, one corner of the room at a time.
I am finding more and more, addictions exist because they provide one a sense of control in an otherwise completely chaotic world. The ability to control how you feel can also be managed through breathing and meditation. As someone who has quit smoking and vaping (heavily) Wim Hoff breathing was the only thing that really got me through the worst initial parts. Highly recommend.
"Is it feelings of shame, is it feelings of 'I've fallen behind, I've screwed up my life'? Is it 'this person is better than me'? Is it insecurity, is it seeking love?" "Yes."
And how did you get there? What feeling do you associate with those questions? Dealing with something seemingly similar (always finding at least something I'm not good enough or behind at) I feel like it's a combination of the rejected/depressed state and an anxiety of "I should be doing" that just gradually pushes me further into coping mechanisms. It's quite difficult to just slow down and have that moment of clarity to just take a step back, look at where you are, like where you really are, not compared to peers, expectations or anything else, just where you are right then and there. Only from that point can you take a real good look at where you're headed and what you want to do as opposed to where your feelings are pushing you astray. Still hard af to actually figure out something to do that will help you move forward, or even hold on to that clarity for an extended period to make the behavioral changes to slowly move away from the maladaptive coping mechanisms which are dominating your/my thoughts and time every day.
@@niels6090 This is such a profound and important answer! I really resonate with what you‘re describing and feel the exact same thing myself basically daily. I recently discovered this channel of this guy called „be something wonderful“ (or something like that), it’s a guy talking about law of attraction and even though I‘m not into that kind of stuff, a lot of thoughts regarding „being in the state“ vs. „getting there slowly“ might be really helpful to you too, you might wanna check it out - you also remind me so much of a former boarding school classmate in germany called Niels too (who looks like your twin lol) so I felt like I had to share that with u :)
@@niels6090 As a follow up to this (I believe) I would really recommend everyone to watch the film Sound of Metal, if you haven't already. To me it deals with addiction and loss in a profound way. I believe we (that are struggling with addiction) are each in our own way dealing with a sense of loss: a loss of a good childhood, loss of love, loss of our dreams, whatever they may be. We need as Niels says, find a way to take a step back and accept and appreciate where we are and what we still have. I think the only way of changing is acceptance (as is evident in alcoholics anonymous etc). You need to feel good (not in a maladaptive way but consistently) to do good.
Something I learned from my therapist for peeps to take or leave is that life or this cycle isn't a straight line. The way he drew it out was like a line graph that has high points and low points. Followed up with 1/3rd of the time we are in tune with our values(how we want to live), 1/3rd we are out of atunement, and that last third is us trying to get back into atunement. The goal is to shorten the amount of time it takes to get back into atunement to encourage that upswing on the graph. Anyway like they say recovery is a life long project and I like to throw that part in where I can. There is this feeling of being "fixed" we go for even though it's explained all the time that's not necessarily how it is. I guess there is when you refer to opiate recovery and AA but even then there is still work. It just changes.
I mean just quit, go sleep early so you have more energy. And excercise! To be fair, there's truth in that, but it's really hard to pinpoint the actual thought -and neurophysical processes that cause people trouble. Even after this video, rooting out the cause for my maladaptive coping mechanisms is still tough, let alone actually coming up with a solution that will work.
As someone who has struggled with an addictive personality.... once I enjoy something I will easily get in the habit of trying to increase to seek this enjoyment... addictions to alcohol and drugs have been a bane of my existence and due to a lot of struggles j have now been able to get off it all... however I will always get hooked on something... Good luck to everyone struggling with addictions... It took me a decade to get of drugs and alcohol... and only fully managed to break free from it by nearly dying to the consequences of it... Currently "only" addicted to digital content consumption and whenever my body allows, gaming
I’ve found easiest way to deal with addictions especially with non-substance is to just spend all of your time outside of your house and with other people.
I’d love to offer my journey/solution to my addiction as a possible case that might help others. I used to be addicted to pot as a coping mechanism. Without it, my mind would just keep racing along with a terrible head fog. While high, I would just constantly have a voice in my head berating myself. So with a completely unrelated issue of migraines, I decided to simply try drinking more water. Now when I feel head fog, I just chug a glass of water. It has been about 3 months. Not only have my migraines gone away completely, but I’ve been able to improve my work performance, drastically reduce my mental health issues (anxiety, social neuroticism, clinical depression), and cut back my pot usage to fridays and saturdays. My GP also has me actively weaning off of my antidepressants and the criticizing voice in my head has become mostly positive even when I decide to get stoned! Take care of your health my bros broettes and nonbronaries. Keeping hydrated has beautifully improved my quality of life and allowed me to start tackling other life issues like they’re nothing. Maybe it can help some of y’all as well :)
Opiate addict on methadone now. I could never stop cold turkey even after rehab, but methadone has saved my life. Thanks for doing this for people. Good for you.
damn this video is so good, I literally bounce off a new coping mexhanism or resort to an older one like once every couple of months most of the time food, video games, youtube, masturbation, money spending, and even like a gf, which sucks because you don’t really see how bad it was till after, or till it’s too late, good to get out of it, but pretty difficult to get out especially organically, you kinda have to want to get out of that mess in order to do better
Notes. We have a mind which juggles positive and negative emotion. It is harder to motivate ourselves to do something when we are experiencing negative mental events. To focus our minds we tend to use a coping mechanism, a tool to calm the mind's distractions. The worst case scenario is when this coping mechanism is an unhealthy substance such as alcohol however activities such as video games, porn, and binge eating are also common. At first we see benefit from the coping mechanism though over time, particularly with substances, the costs will start to outweigh the benefits, primarily through the mechanism of physiological tolerance. Substances such as alcohol and caffeine have a physiological effect on the body. As we use these regularly our body adapts such that when the substance is removed we tend to have the opposite of the drug e.g. caffeine withdrawal causes tiredness and low energy while alcohol withdrawal can cause anxiety and seizures, this is why quitting alcohol cold turkey is so dangerous. Some of our addictions don't develop this same kind of physiologic withdrawal e.g. video games or porn yet we still develop clear dependencies and quitting can result in a flurry of negative mental states. Why is this? If I'm using a coping mechanism to deal with negative emotion and then stop that underlying negative emotion does not go away and when we stop we start to see an upswing of those negative mental states which could lead us to reach towards another equally or more unhealthy coping mechanism. When we get rid of a coping mechanism we can expect some of the following to happen: 1 - You start to lean more on other unhealthy coping mechanisms. 2 - You may start to experience more mental discomfort. This points us towards solutions for these problems. 1 - Develop healthier coping mechanisms. We want to engage in an activity that helps reduce our mental stress without being unhealthy, a great example is meditation. 2 - Start dealing with mental discomfort instead of avoiding it. We must work on how we deal with mental discomfort in the long term and the short term. In the long term we should do work on those internal feelings through therapy and counselling, understanding our belief systems by looking at their origin. In the short term we can sit with our negative emotion, see our mind trying to get us to run away, essentially meditating. In summary you experience negative emotion and the hardest thing to do is nothing. If your comfort mechanism of choice is a substance then seek medical advice before quitting. Ultimately have faith that the withdrawals will subside but do not be naïve to expect quitting one comfort mechanism will solve all your problems and understand you must work on the underlying negative emotion. However, don't use that work as an excuse to continue an unhealthy coping mechanism, sometimes it could be better to switch it for something slightly less bad even if it isn't the best as it will reduce some of the negative emotion you are running from.
What a wonderful episode Dr. K, thank you for this. My ex gf has restless leg syndrome, it was funny and kind of cute. Completely dead asleep, laying on her front, one of her legs would bend at the knee 90 degrees then just drop. Over, and over, and over again.. I found out if I just rubbed her leg for a minute or so it would stop. That is a super wild and strange condition, definitely sleep disrupting . Also, kinda funny, my cat who is extremely ptsd-level scared of everything, from fast movement to crinkling bags, would lay between our legs at the foot of the bed, right next to her guillotine-of-a-shin, and it didn't bother him at all.
I had a bad therapist a few years ago. It's tough watching your videos because I really could have used a professional like you. Instead, I had a dinosaur close to retirement who thought I was a millennial snowflake that failed classes simply because I didn't try hard enough. He wasn't wrong, but I left unmotivated.
For those wondering, there is a link between RLS and Parkinson's as both as brought about by a dopamine deficiency. Similarly, such a deficiency can cause depressive symptoms, especially anhedonia and a lack of drive. This is also why SSRIs aren't the cure for all depression: different neurotransmitters can be the culprit, so there's a lot of trial and error involved in discovering what underlying causes for depression are. Ultimately, a good diet and lifestyle will help many regulate their hormones and neurotransmitters, but there can be circumstances in which impairments affect the absorption or production of these. If you're curious as to what may be a culprit for you, there are charts comparing the symptoms of both high and low levels of neurotransmitters and other hormones to give you a general idea of what changes need to be made. Best of luck!
6:00 figuring out the coping mechanisms that work for us 6:23 addiction -- adaptive turning to mal-adaptive; cost becoming greater than benefits 7:49 developing tolerance
I really appreciate the sheer amount of effort and care that goes into these videos. It feels as if the heartiest parts of helpful information is put in and it's not watered down at all. I've personally been growing an insane amount through all the videos you guys put out and been sharing with my gf and family who can all use the help. I just want to take a minute to appreciate and thank you guys for everything. You're making a massive difference.
There are definitely physical withdrawal symptoms with weed too, way more subtle but kinda harder to deal with for it. Stuff like sleep loss and appetite loss are big too.
YES! I get nauseated, lose my appetite and even puke sometimes the few times I had to stop. Insomnia, anxiety, irritability, brain fog, headaches... I might be too attentive to how I felt when I stopped smoking but I did feel horrible (and need to stop again lol)
A big one is irritation. Your mind is so used to being numbed that being off the stuff makes things that would annoy you a little end up annoying you a lot.
Sweating was a big thing when i quit weed after smoking daily for years. Soooo much sweating. Theres definitely physical withdrawal symptoms that can happen when you quit weed. No where near as bad as when i quit tabacco mind you, but its there.
@@quinnkappeyne230 1000% sweating is the most noticeable for me too, every time. For me the worst thing about it are the hands, I have sweaty palms 24/7 for at least a week after quitting and the sweating while sleeping.. Could change sheets every few hours
@@quinnkappeyne230 Sweating is definetly a symptom, i have found often most of it is anxiety related, from my own experience atleast, managing my anxiety reduced the sweating to only nightly occurrences and not even every night.
For me UA-cam just doesn't hit like it used to after quitting weed. I find myself not seeing a good video to watch then staring off into space losing interest in my phone. It's weird.
Not gonna lie “it’s really easy to find someone to fall in love with when you’re both addicted to the same substance” felt like a chest punch. Thanks for opening my lungs with that necessary breath of fresh air.
00:14 💊 Addictions, especially to substances like alcohol and opiates, lead to profound physiological changes and potentially fatal withdrawal symptoms. 00:42 💔 Emotional factors, including trauma and the need for love, often underpin addictions, making recovery more complex. 05:24 🧠 Individuals gravitate towards certain substances or behaviors as coping mechanisms based on psychological and neurobiological factors. 14:09 🔄 Removing an addiction often leads to the rise of negative mental states and a reliance on other unhealthy coping mechanisms. 27:00 🛠 Successful recovery from addiction involves both finding healthy coping mechanisms and doing internal emotional work to address underlying issues.
I definitely need this video.. was very heavily dependent on weed then swapped to caffeine then swapped to podcasts now I’m swapping to alcohol it’s a brutal cycle.
I quit smoking and alcohol. Key is to reduce,not to break it away. Always have a cigaretge and alkohol all the time so you never get in a state of panic. Worked for me. Right now.I bought a bottle of jack danis after 2 years of not drinking, and it took me a month to drink the bottle having 1-3 drinks. It could easily take me 1 night to drink most of it before.
i've gained so much weight by binge eating. my normal meals are healthy and i exercise plenty. but coping with loneliness and stress i reach for chocolate and snacks that ruin my diet and my healthy body. the only thing i have found that worked for me, years ago, was turning my addiction around into anorexic behaviours: obsessing over calories and fearing to eat food. obviously that's not the right way either, but at least i lost weight. i wish i knew how to break out of this, it makes me so depressed :-(
Have you tried walking out in nature? A 20 minute walk after a meal I find really improves my mood. Walking has a plethora of benefits. As far as tackling the problem I’d try not to keep those high sugar snacks in the house and reach for a bottle of water or coffee (decaf or regular). The water and coffee will keep your stomach full and prevent overeating. When you think you’re hungry sometimes you’re actually just thirsty. Coffee is also an appetite suppressant.
I'm bouncing from ending one addiction to ending another with Dr. K's guidance 👌 Bruh, I'm all the way down to caffeine is how much healthier I've become. Now if only I could stop dark chocolate covered almonds... Help me, Dr. K!
Wow, after watching this video. I have a lot more knowledge about my mental state, my mind and my coping mechanisms. Thank you so much Dr K. This video is very helpful to me!
I’ve been really enjoying the discussions you’ve been producing recently on all these different subjects. You’re providing all sorts of useful, actionable information. My only complaint is the animated green background is really distracting for me lol 😂. Not a big deal as I just listen to it like a podcast instead.
this is true, ive just stopped playing video games recently, canceled my WoW sub, finished Elden Ring. And now i have reoccurring panic attacks and anxiety. I beat my self up both physically and mentally. I have now stockpiled my work thats due in few days, yet here i am doomscrolling youtube. i need help. i actually need help.
Withdrawal def caused one of the worst weeks I’ve ever experienced…but I think a week where someone looses a loved one (such as a family member) is far worse.
My ideal treatment plan for someone demonstrating multiple addictions or cross-addictions is to use harm reduction strategies to have them walk down the continuum of harm while chipping away at the root causes of their addiction(s). The order can differ from person to person, but substance use & gambling are typically the first battles I tackle, followed by food-based addictions, then porn, then social media, videogames, general screen time, and lastly the smaller addictive behaviors. Again, the addiction treatment simply does not work in a vacuum though, you have to be helping to cure the root causes. Also, the success rate for quitting multiple addictions at once while also trying to live a full life (aka not going to rehab or be in a rehabilitation type period where you're utilizing literally 100% of your time and effort to recover) is abysmally low, like well below a single % point.
This is very interesting topic and helped me remind some keypoints in mental and substance abuse services field of social work. And also explained something of my own life: when I stopped drinking (wasn’t heavy drinker but I clearly selfmedicated with beer or two here and there), I noticed after couple months that my overall performance went worse over time. I wondered why is it like that: isn’t stopping drinking supposed to improve my performance? After 6-7 months of soberness I had a long and good talk with my friend, who has ADHD. After the talk I decided to start the diagnostic progress: And got diagnosed with ADHD after a year. And that diagnose explained so much from the past and the selfmedication with drinking beer. Stimulant medication has helped alot with the symptoms and nowadays I am more aware of my different behaviors and neurochemical inconvenience, I can manage the ”med holidays” pretty well… but still some days are bad and I try to plan ahead those days that I don’t need to be fully functional for anything special.
i am someone who occassionally uses comfort food, but my main vice is my social media addiction. On multiple occasions i have found myself going back to it again and again, its annoying. Same with foods like sugary crunchy peanut butter, cheese, carbs like bread and pasta, and sometimes even certain types of vegetables, especially carrots lol, bc/ i tell myself they are healthy, so its okay. I often eat til i am so bloated that it hurts to sit, and sometimes even lean in certain positions and breath. Based on my size its hard to tell i use food as a coping mechanism, but my mum also has the same problem sadly, and she too is at a healthy BMI. I'm guessing tho it might be bc/ we both cope with vegetables and fruit and typcially healthy foods, but its still an issue i have, and it rlly annoys me. Social media however, thats only something i use, but i always found it to help, but then i also always spend way too long on it i then get depressed or i look at other people enjoying life and then get jealous. Also, on multiple occasions i cope by procrasting my sleep, something my mum has also done, which affects my menstral cycle, appetite by leading to me eat more food. My family also has a history with alchol addiction luckly i don't drink and never intend to start either. Oh, i also like walking and dancing as a form of exercise, but when ever i spend too long on social media, i sometimes don't leave my house for days, and on occasion weeks. On multiple occasions i have tried to quit technology, i go into a much larger food addiction, often to cope with boredom. I need to find more porductive ways to cope, such as walking, or weight lifting, or even listening to music helps. Actually, at the moment, i like writing, an organising. That is one of my more healthier addictions, often spending hours just moving things around lol., or hours even writing and planning :) Sometimes even journalling helps too, bc/ i like writing so much, or drawing helps also, i am good and drawing thats why. also have tried mindfullness too. Stress, boredom, guilt, and anxiety are my main reasons for these coping mechanisms
The worst is the feedback loop, like you use pornography, which eventually messes with your head enough that you don't think it'll be possible to have a relationship, so you have a negative emotion tied to that, so how can you cope with that? Why more pornography of course!
And then you start rationalizing that if you distract yourself with that quickly enough, instead of wasting days trying to identify a vid, then you motivate yourself to finish fast and continue with your plans. And then rational thoughts return and you're even more ashamed because you would totally be embarrassed if you quick-shotted with a girl, so you're not even relaxed anymore.
I feel like this is how I am. I become addicted to people, substances and almost anything easily. I've been diagnosed as BPD and Bipolar. I feel like there's narcissism in me too. I can't fully quit alcohol and weed. I have no friends and I feel like it's getting harder to talk to people. I'm becoming more recluse. I need weed to be able to have the motivation to go to the gym. I work out 5 days a week but when I work out I take edibles or I don't find the motivation. I used to hook up a lot from Grindr. I don't know what's going on I feel worse.
Quitting Canabis during my heaviest time of use, I definitely had physiologic withdrawal symptoms. For 2 weeks I would wake up during the night drenched in sweat, have sweaty hands and headaches. Might have been quitting tobacco, but I quit nicotine some time later for good and had no symptoms.
Addiction has a very specific meaning, and I think the push to redefine that word to include everything someone doesn't like is purely an effort to allow the application of circular, abusive AA style rhetoric to that activity. Nobody's ever been accused of being addicted to reading books, staring at the wall, or playing football, because those things are socially acceptable and safe activities, even when done to unhealthy degrees. And there isn't a religion teaching that those things are bad driving narratives about them.
I noticed that the easiest way to break an addiction it to do it co consciously, and just enough not to feel miserable, not enough to get you high. Because if you feel miserable, your brain switches to autopilot and stops asking you for a permission to use the substance you are using. In this state of mind, you'll definitely abuse your substance of choice. However if you are conscious and use just a little bit before you go into the autopilot mode you will feel not as bad of withdrawals, and at the same time teaching you that this thing doesn't give you that much high overall.
I know that I am ridiculously sugar addicted and this video got me thinking: what negative emotion is causing me to overeat? I couldn't figure it out for a bit because my overeating sugary foods is almost always after dinner, so I can't think of a negative circumstance that would trigger it. But then I remembered: when I was bullied intensely in middle school, I felt especially lonely/unwanted during lunch hearing everyone else talking and laughing, and I would often buy a bunch of cookies from the cafeteria and just keep eating them until the lunch period was over. It's loneliness! The time I was eating the healthiest was my first two years of college, when I had a consistent group of friends that I regularly spent time with. Over covid I lost contact with all of those friends and have been extremely lonely, and in that time I have also gotten worse about over-eating sugary foods. It's so hard to make friends though so I'm probably going to stay sugar-addicted for a while :(
Holy shit, you just made me have a 'penny-drop-moment'! I think I binge eat out of loneliness too. I have a hard time connecting with people, and when I come home after hanging out I feel like such an alien compared to them and that's when I binge. I've been avoiding hanging out with people because of it which made me even more lonely and eat even more. I'm not sure how to use this info yet but it must be a step in the right direction? Anyway thanks a bunch for sharing your experience, you've actually helped me a lot. I hope things get better for you!
Same exact thing loneliness bullying made me avoid people ... gotta spend time someway so binge eat ... family is emotionally abusive don't want to see them over lunch or dinner order some unhealthy shit and eat alone
Ohh absolutely recognise the connection between food addiction and insomnia. I tend to eat more to feel better during periods when I cannot sleep well. I've had several addictions I will not specify but by far the most difficult to leave behind is the one to my phone. Can you talk about information/social media/phone (whatever it's actually called) addiction?
Thank you so much for removing twitch chat from your videos!!! I found it annoying and unnecessary, and also I ran into a situation where I thought an adult acquaintance, who is dealing with a son that plays a lot of video games to the detriment of his sleep, could benefit greatly from the info on this channel, but I was worried that the chat would confuse her and drive her away from using the content here. The videos are much cleaner and more presentable without the constant scrolling and often crass nature of chat. THANK YOU THANK YOU!!!!
My problem is that I feel worthless as a man because I got rejected by every single woman I was interested in (which number in the hundreds by now). My dream is to have a loving wife and kids to come home to, someone to be there for me when I need it the most, someone to travel and see the world with, someone to grow old with, and the universe simply won't let me have that. Apparently I have to be happy by myself first before I can be happy with someone else, but I just can't. I can't. And the fact that I see unhappy people still ending up finding love and relationships kills me. So I bounce between weed, porn and games to cope. They're what enables me to get up, earn a paycheck and go out to talk to girls even though all of it only adds up to more rejections for me to throw on the pile. If only I had someone in my life who loved me, my life would be so much better and I'd be pulled out of the darkness, but alas I'm still left to wander the earth with a purpose I can't fulfill.
@@Dimitris_Half I believe incels can benefit from a bit of sympathy just as much as anyone else. Now there IS a line not to cross between sympathy and full-on enabling, and I try my best to keep that in mind when interacting with potentially “problematic” people. Anyway, it was good arguing with you
funny thing is (i think) i know my source of addiction which is school anxiety problem is I'm not sure how to fix the underlying issue other than just "cope better" the straightforward answer would be just to actually work hard, can't have anxiety if all the work is done i know i have the skill to do it, it's just for some reason this past 2 years, my drive to work just crashed most of my friend told me that, "at this point man, the only solution is just to suck it up, and do it" which I'm inclined to agree, but for some reason has been so hard to do
Should look into CHS. It’s when you chronically use weed and it eventually causes prolonged nausea and irritation until you abstain from smoking while riding a week of no eating and hell.
i can confirm that selfH will be mostly used to "re-focus". it's like touching a misbehaving dog, ideally done without any harmful intent. i'd prefer chili though. the burn is calculatable, the amount is calculatable, overdoses may just result in unwanted delayed selfH and it comes without staying scars.
Personally I'm a collector. Caffeine, nicotine, habitual drinking, weed, psychedelics, gaming, youtube, watching the same movies and series year after year...
You arent addicted to dopamine. Dopamine is the neuro chemical that drives you to do anything. Like say be motivated to eating some food you get a spike of dopamine in the brain. But you dont get addicted to dopamine
I'm realizing the connection between me overcoming several of my addictions and some of the issues that followed. It makes so much more sense now, knowing that it just takes time is so important
I went from music, to the card game yugioh, to league of legends, to black desert online... and I've looped back to league. Not sure I can actually kick it. Been telling myself for 6-7 years "If I don't make diamond this year, I'll quit." hehe here I am still grinding in season 12 :')
For me, marijuana is not an addictive substance. It tends to make me overthink and self reflect which enforces a positive change in my outlook. I do also have a p0rn addiction which is triggered during high levels of anxiety. I only tend to smoke when I have a clear plate and low anxiety levels.
Same for me. Smoking started when I was stressed in college. But after my life changed it goes off and on but recently I've been thinking about it forms a gateway to smoking tobacco (black and milds). Which didnt help. It got so bad I cant smoke weed sometimes without a black, I cant breathe or sleep without either sometimes neither.
It’s too hard to be aware of the issue long enough to change anything in a fast enough time, how do we become more present and aware of our internal experience, it’s like I need someone to remind me
I hate watching this channel. I can't internalize anything so all I'm left with is binge watching these talks with no effort on my end to improve. So I guess I hate myself lol
I wouldn't list video games as an addiction for me, personally. I can go and play a game for an hour or 2, and then move on with my life. I may not play again until the following day, next week or next month, and I don't feel that addiction. There are some games that I enjoy more than others, and before I know it, half of the day is gone, but not at the expense of more important things.
Just wanna say this channel has recently gotten an absurdly high upgrade in terms of production quality. Visually with the new background and updated visuals, sonically with added sound effects and musical queues, and even the content (Dr. K and his talks) seems to be more refined with an increased presentational charisma--for lack of a better word xD. Well done to the whole team!
I agree!!
2nded! The titles and topics are also more clear and helpful and less jebaity
Yeye agreeee
now they just have to update the thumbnails
Nah the background music isn't ambient enough and sounds out of the place, the audio balance is not good either. The background animation is a bit distracting as well.
@@androidbluat background music is fine for an intro. Also I agree that the sound effects could be just a bit quieter, but the rest of the audio balancing is getting into nitpicking territory imo. I don't find the background gradient distracting at all.
This reminds me of how awesome the book 'infinite jest' is. Addiction is one of the main themes and one passage that stuck with me was how sobriety is painful as it allows you to remember the things that made you become an addict in the first place.
I've never thought about it that way.
ive been meaning to read it for a minute :/ guess i gotta now!!!
Another great book is *Atomic Habits*
~ Addiction itself is Rough ( *Unfortunately* ) - There isn't a lot books on this I've found*
I really enjoyed "in the realm of hungry ghosts" if anyone else is looking for recommendations
Ah, the wasteland of reality
Romantic relationships can be an addictive/codependent nightmare. People who can't stay single bounce from one problematic relationship to another to cope.
Yeah it can. But in my experiance, you can help each other to be better. My fiance has problems and i have others. She helps me with my problems and vice versa.
And show me a relationship where everything is perfect all the time. This doesn't exist or both don't care about anything.
Relationships are work, but they are worth it, if you get the right one.
@@nerdkartoffl9019but that's one relationship not bouncing back and forth between relationships with different people
My ex did the same. Saw things slipping because she was failing to follow through or talk about relationships issues so she left me for another addict.
Ugh this is my friend I'm trying to help him see the pattern.
fax
This is some of the most valuable knowledge for the 21st century and should unironically be taught in schools especially in highschools. insane episode dr. k
I've discovered this along the way. The "you're it" mechanism of addiction. To me, it's the understanding that one is an addict, much more than limiting it to whatever substance or behavior we try to get off of. And, of course, the root cause of needing to cope. Your content is so important, thank you Dr K ❤
This is really interesting and shows that any coping mechanism can become maladaptive if overused.. I always switch between comfort eating and entertainment to relieve anxiety but they are both counter-productive and make my anxiety worse in the long term
I feel like any coping mechanism that is just "consuming" instead of "doing X to eventually get y" ends up being rampantly aggressive to ourselves, since it ends up being a "passive" form of soothing,especially food. Good luck, man
All you need is Allah. Become a pious, practicing Muslim and all your troubles will be solved. May Allah guide you back to Siratul Mustaqeem. Ameen.
@@arraikcruor6407 🪝 🐟
@@arraikcruor6407 i feel like religion can also be categorized under the "coping" term, since i saw many people with real problems try to not solve the problem itself, but jumped aside and soothed and distracted themselves from the actual problem
@@arraikcruor6407 ah yes, religion, the ultimate cope
Uploaded on 4/20 for the recovering stoners. Well done 👏
And for the avid potheads that are considering quitting 🙋🏻♀️
What's helped me get to sleep (as I've been detoxing from Gabapentin and Suboxone, very difficult to sleep) is meditation. When you lie down to sleep - you want to relax all muscles through your body, one section at a time. Then change your focus ONLY to your breathing, and empty your mind the best you can. Anytime a thought comes up, ignore it and remember your breathing. Focus ONLY on the breathing - and you want your breathing to mimic that of a person who is already asleep. You want to breathe in deeply, hold it for a split second (don't go TOO slowly), let go of the breath (again, for a split second let your lungs stay deflated, not too long), then repeat. You want a steady and slow rhythm. This has helped me more than ANYTHING for trying to sleep through intense shitty drug withdrawal.
I already forgot about this one read it a lo g time ago
Focusing on each section minutely, starting at either you scalp or you toes and working down or up your body, and not allowing any muscle to retighten before concentrating on the next, puts me to sleep w/o fail. For me, starting with my scalp, forehead, then ears, eyelids, cheeks, lips, etc. works better than starting with my toes. I never get much further than my jaw and I’m asleep. The breathing slows down naturally as each set of muscles lets go of tension. If any start to retighten I return my concentration on getting them to let go again. Maybe this is meditation to some. To me it’s just a quiet closing off the lights, one corner of the room at a time.
Look up the military method, how to fall asleep in two minutes. It really works.
I forgot about this strategy, used to work wonders for me
I am finding more and more, addictions exist because they provide one a sense of control in an otherwise completely chaotic world. The ability to control how you feel can also be managed through breathing and meditation. As someone who has quit smoking and vaping (heavily) Wim Hoff breathing was the only thing that really got me through the worst initial parts. Highly recommend.
"Is it feelings of shame, is it feelings of 'I've fallen behind, I've screwed up my life'? Is it 'this person is better than me'? Is it insecurity, is it seeking love?"
"Yes."
And how did you get there? What feeling do you associate with those questions?
Dealing with something seemingly similar (always finding at least something I'm not good enough or behind at) I feel like it's a combination of the rejected/depressed state and an anxiety of "I should be doing" that just gradually pushes me further into coping mechanisms. It's quite difficult to just slow down and have that moment of clarity to just take a step back, look at where you are, like where you really are, not compared to peers, expectations or anything else, just where you are right then and there. Only from that point can you take a real good look at where you're headed and what you want to do as opposed to where your feelings are pushing you astray.
Still hard af to actually figure out something to do that will help you move forward, or even hold on to that clarity for an extended period to make the behavioral changes to slowly move away from the maladaptive coping mechanisms which are dominating your/my thoughts and time every day.
@@niels6090 This is such a profound and important answer! I really resonate with what you‘re describing and feel the exact same thing myself basically daily. I recently discovered this channel of this guy called „be something wonderful“ (or something like that), it’s a guy talking about law of attraction and even though I‘m not into that kind of stuff, a lot of thoughts regarding „being in the state“ vs. „getting there slowly“ might be really helpful to you too, you might wanna check it out - you also remind me so much of a former boarding school classmate in germany called Niels too (who looks like your twin lol) so I felt like I had to share that with u :)
bro! I was LITERALLY typing the SAME comment. damn. lol.
@@niels6090 As a follow up to this (I believe) I would really recommend everyone to watch the film Sound of Metal, if you haven't already. To me it deals with addiction and loss in a profound way. I believe we (that are struggling with addiction) are each in our own way dealing with a sense of loss: a loss of a good childhood, loss of love, loss of our dreams, whatever they may be. We need as Niels says, find a way to take a step back and accept and appreciate where we are and what we still have. I think the only way of changing is acceptance (as is evident in alcoholics anonymous etc). You need to feel good (not in a maladaptive way but consistently) to do good.
@@TheDavveponken Oh thank you. Regardless of our topic here that actually seems like a nice movie to spend an evening with.
Something I learned from my therapist for peeps to take or leave is that life or this cycle isn't a straight line. The way he drew it out was like a line graph that has high points and low points. Followed up with 1/3rd of the time we are in tune with our values(how we want to live), 1/3rd we are out of atunement, and that last third is us trying to get back into atunement. The goal is to shorten the amount of time it takes to get back into atunement to encourage that upswing on the graph. Anyway like they say recovery is a life long project and I like to throw that part in where I can. There is this feeling of being "fixed" we go for even though it's explained all the time that's not necessarily how it is. I guess there is when you refer to opiate recovery and AA but even then there is still work. It just changes.
Thank you for this. I would love more addiction content. So many people struggle with it and the pain. The stigma is real.
I mean just quit, go sleep early so you have more energy. And excercise!
To be fair, there's truth in that, but it's really hard to pinpoint the actual thought -and neurophysical processes that cause people trouble. Even after this video, rooting out the cause for my maladaptive coping mechanisms is still tough, let alone actually coming up with a solution that will work.
@@niels6090 lmao
@@niels6090 eyeroll
i deeply sympathize with your comment but your pfp has been bothering me for upwards of 3 minutes in the writing of this comment
gemmy pfp alert
I feel like he keeps uploading videos that are directly for me.
As someone who has struggled with an addictive personality.... once I enjoy something I will easily get in the habit of trying to increase to seek this enjoyment... addictions to alcohol and drugs have been a bane of my existence and due to a lot of struggles j have now been able to get off it all... however I will always get hooked on something...
Good luck to everyone struggling with addictions... It took me a decade to get of drugs and alcohol... and only fully managed to break free from it by nearly dying to the consequences of it...
Currently "only" addicted to digital content consumption and whenever my body allows, gaming
Keep living king
Keep up the good work king👑👑
I’ve found easiest way to deal with addictions especially with non-substance is to just spend all of your time outside of your house and with other people.
I’d love to offer my journey/solution to my addiction as a possible case that might help others.
I used to be addicted to pot as a coping mechanism. Without it, my mind would just keep racing along with a terrible head fog. While high, I would just constantly have a voice in my head berating myself. So with a completely unrelated issue of migraines, I decided to simply try drinking more water. Now when I feel head fog, I just chug a glass of water.
It has been about 3 months. Not only have my migraines gone away completely, but I’ve been able to improve my work performance, drastically reduce my mental health issues (anxiety, social neuroticism, clinical depression), and cut back my pot usage to fridays and saturdays. My GP also has me actively weaning off of my antidepressants and the criticizing voice in my head has become mostly positive even when I decide to get stoned!
Take care of your health my bros broettes and nonbronaries. Keeping hydrated has beautifully improved my quality of life and allowed me to start tackling other life issues like they’re nothing. Maybe it can help some of y’all as well :)
Hydro homies! Thanks for sharing your story, glad to see it ended well for you!
@@stef9019 "hydro homies" I love that haha
i quit vaping by drinking water whenever i felt the urge to puff
Good work my man.
Could we have more videos about developing healthy coping mechanisms? And using them rather than our default addictive behaviours?
I second that
Opiate addict on methadone now. I could never stop cold turkey even after rehab, but methadone has saved my life.
Thanks for doing this for people. Good for you.
damn this video is so good, I literally bounce off a new coping mexhanism or resort to an older one like once every couple of months most of the time food, video games, youtube, masturbation, money spending, and even like a gf, which sucks because you don’t really see how bad it was till after, or till it’s too late, good to get out of it, but pretty difficult to get out especially organically, you kinda have to want to get out of that mess in order to do better
I really need a soundbite of Dr.K saying "this edible ain't shit"
"this edible ain't shit"
@tentrailer He never said it, i just wish he did. I would've immediately made a video out of it
@tentrailer i think the only "drug" dr.k would really indulge in is shrooms. the rest don't really fit with his vibe
now you can do it with AI voice
@@samartheory never
Notes.
We have a mind which juggles positive and negative emotion.
It is harder to motivate ourselves to do something when we are experiencing negative mental events.
To focus our minds we tend to use a coping mechanism, a tool to calm the mind's distractions.
The worst case scenario is when this coping mechanism is an unhealthy substance such as alcohol however
activities such as video games, porn, and binge eating are also common.
At first we see benefit from the coping mechanism though over time, particularly with substances, the costs
will start to outweigh the benefits, primarily through the mechanism of physiological tolerance.
Substances such as alcohol and caffeine have a physiological effect on the body. As we use these regularly our
body adapts such that when the substance is removed we tend to have the opposite of the drug e.g. caffeine withdrawal
causes tiredness and low energy while alcohol withdrawal can cause anxiety and seizures, this is why quitting alcohol
cold turkey is so dangerous.
Some of our addictions don't develop this same kind of physiologic withdrawal e.g. video games or porn yet we
still develop clear dependencies and quitting can result in a flurry of negative mental states. Why is this?
If I'm using a coping mechanism to deal with negative emotion and then stop that underlying negative emotion does
not go away and when we stop we start to see an upswing of those negative mental states which could lead us to
reach towards another equally or more unhealthy coping mechanism.
When we get rid of a coping mechanism we can expect some of the following to happen:
1 - You start to lean more on other unhealthy coping mechanisms.
2 - You may start to experience more mental discomfort.
This points us towards solutions for these problems.
1 - Develop healthier coping mechanisms.
We want to engage in an activity that helps reduce our mental stress without being unhealthy, a great example is
meditation.
2 - Start dealing with mental discomfort instead of avoiding it.
We must work on how we deal with mental discomfort in the long term and the short term.
In the long term we should do work on those internal feelings through therapy and counselling, understanding our belief systems by looking at their origin.
In the short term we can sit with our negative emotion, see our mind trying to get us to run away, essentially meditating.
In summary you experience negative emotion and the hardest thing to do is nothing.
If your comfort mechanism of choice is a substance then seek medical advice before quitting.
Ultimately have faith that the withdrawals will subside but do not be naïve to expect quitting
one comfort mechanism will solve all your problems and understand you must work on the underlying negative emotion. However, don't use that work as an excuse to continue an unhealthy coping mechanism, sometimes it could be better to switch it for something slightly less bad even if it isn't the best as it will reduce some of the negative emotion you are running from.
21:11
Dr.K - is it feeling of shame? is it I've fallen behind, I've screwed up my life? is it insecurity? need to be loved?
Me - yes. yes. yes.
What a wonderful episode Dr. K, thank you for this.
My ex gf has restless leg syndrome, it was funny and kind of cute. Completely dead asleep, laying on her front, one of her legs would bend at the knee 90 degrees then just drop. Over, and over, and over again.. I found out if I just rubbed her leg for a minute or so it would stop.
That is a super wild and strange condition, definitely sleep disrupting .
Also, kinda funny, my cat who is extremely ptsd-level scared of everything, from fast movement to crinkling bags, would lay between our legs at the foot of the bed, right next to her guillotine-of-a-shin, and it didn't bother him at all.
I had a bad therapist a few years ago. It's tough watching your videos because I really could have used a professional like you. Instead, I had a dinosaur close to retirement who thought I was a millennial snowflake that failed classes simply because I didn't try hard enough. He wasn't wrong, but I left unmotivated.
For those wondering, there is a link between RLS and Parkinson's as both as brought about by a dopamine deficiency. Similarly, such a deficiency can cause depressive symptoms, especially anhedonia and a lack of drive.
This is also why SSRIs aren't the cure for all depression: different neurotransmitters can be the culprit, so there's a lot of trial and error involved in discovering what underlying causes for depression are.
Ultimately, a good diet and lifestyle will help many regulate their hormones and neurotransmitters, but there can be circumstances in which impairments affect the absorption or production of these. If you're curious as to what may be a culprit for you, there are charts comparing the symptoms of both high and low levels of neurotransmitters and other hormones to give you a general idea of what changes need to be made. Best of luck!
love this new era of Healthy Gamer
6:00 figuring out the coping mechanisms that work for us 6:23 addiction -- adaptive turning to mal-adaptive; cost becoming greater than benefits 7:49 developing tolerance
I really appreciate the sheer amount of effort and care that goes into these videos.
It feels as if the heartiest parts of helpful information is put in and it's not watered down at all.
I've personally been growing an insane amount through all the videos you guys put out and been sharing with my gf and family who can all use the help.
I just want to take a minute to appreciate and thank you guys for everything. You're making a massive difference.
There are definitely physical withdrawal symptoms with weed too, way more subtle but kinda harder to deal with for it. Stuff like sleep loss and appetite loss are big too.
YES! I get nauseated, lose my appetite and even puke sometimes the few times I had to stop. Insomnia, anxiety, irritability, brain fog, headaches... I might be too attentive to how I felt when I stopped smoking but I did feel horrible (and need to stop again lol)
A big one is irritation. Your mind is so used to being numbed that being off the stuff makes things that would annoy you a little end up annoying you a lot.
Sweating was a big thing when i quit weed after smoking daily for years. Soooo much sweating. Theres definitely physical withdrawal symptoms that can happen when you quit weed. No where near as bad as when i quit tabacco mind you, but its there.
@@quinnkappeyne230 1000%
sweating is the most noticeable for me too, every time. For me the worst thing about it are the hands, I have sweaty palms 24/7 for at least a week after quitting and the sweating while sleeping.. Could change sheets every few hours
@@quinnkappeyne230 Sweating is definetly a symptom, i have found often most of it is anxiety related, from my own experience atleast, managing my anxiety reduced the sweating to only nightly occurrences and not even every night.
I’m addicted to UA-cam
For me UA-cam just doesn't hit like it used to after quitting weed. I find myself not seeing a good video to watch then staring off into space losing interest in my phone. It's weird.
I don’t think UA-cam is as bad as “regular social media” like ig / facebook etc.
Not gonna lie “it’s really easy to find someone to fall in love with when you’re both addicted to the same substance” felt like a chest punch. Thanks for opening my lungs with that necessary breath of fresh air.
00:14 💊 Addictions, especially to substances like alcohol and opiates, lead to profound physiological changes and potentially fatal withdrawal symptoms.
00:42 💔 Emotional factors, including trauma and the need for love, often underpin addictions, making recovery more complex.
05:24 🧠 Individuals gravitate towards certain substances or behaviors as coping mechanisms based on psychological and neurobiological factors.
14:09 🔄 Removing an addiction often leads to the rise of negative mental states and a reliance on other unhealthy coping mechanisms.
27:00 🛠 Successful recovery from addiction involves both finding healthy coping mechanisms and doing internal emotional work to address underlying issues.
I definitely need this video.. was very heavily dependent on weed then swapped to caffeine then swapped to podcasts now I’m swapping to alcohol it’s a brutal cycle.
Careful with alcohol, you might be better off cycling between the first 3... then 2... then 1... then 0
this is why its so important to regulate your drugs 🙏
I quit smoking and alcohol. Key is to reduce,not to break it away. Always have a cigaretge and alkohol all the time so you never get in a state of panic. Worked for me.
Right now.I bought a bottle of jack danis after 2 years of not drinking, and it took me a month to drink the bottle having 1-3 drinks. It could easily take me 1 night to drink most of it before.
i've gained so much weight by binge eating. my normal meals are healthy and i exercise plenty. but coping with loneliness and stress i reach for chocolate and snacks that ruin my diet and my healthy body. the only thing i have found that worked for me, years ago, was turning my addiction around into anorexic behaviours: obsessing over calories and fearing to eat food. obviously that's not the right way either, but at least i lost weight. i wish i knew how to break out of this, it makes me so depressed :-(
Have you tried walking out in nature? A 20 minute walk after a meal I find really improves my mood. Walking has a plethora of benefits. As far as tackling the problem I’d try not to keep those high sugar snacks in the house and reach for a bottle of water or coffee (decaf or regular). The water and coffee will keep your stomach full and prevent overeating. When you think you’re hungry sometimes you’re actually just thirsty. Coffee is also an appetite suppressant.
I'm bouncing from ending one addiction to ending another with Dr. K's guidance 👌 Bruh, I'm all the way down to caffeine is how much healthier I've become. Now if only I could stop dark chocolate covered almonds... Help me, Dr. K!
Wow, after watching this video. I have a lot more knowledge about my mental state, my mind and my coping mechanisms. Thank you so much Dr K. This video is very helpful to me!
I’ve been really enjoying the discussions you’ve been producing recently on all these different subjects. You’re providing all sorts of useful, actionable information. My only complaint is the animated green background is really distracting for me lol 😂. Not a big deal as I just listen to it like a podcast instead.
this is true, ive just stopped playing video games recently, canceled my WoW sub, finished Elden Ring. And now i have reoccurring panic attacks and anxiety. I beat my self up both physically and mentally. I have now stockpiled my work thats due in few days, yet here i am doomscrolling youtube. i need help. i actually need help.
Withdrawal def caused one of the worst weeks I’ve ever experienced…but I think a week where someone looses a loved one (such as a family member) is far worse.
I learned that if I don’t tend to my ‘mind’ garden, weeds will grow there too! Thanks, Dr K!
Sometimes I re write comments because I feel like I am not saying everything I want to say, so what I will see is thank you for your insight.
I'm upstairs! Love y'all and wish the best ❣️
I feel called out by every title of Dr.K's videos, but at least I'm aware of that now. Hope that's a good start.
Such a great explanation of addiction. Def sharing!!!
How can one man keep posting personal attacks on me every single video
What do you mean?
My ideal treatment plan for someone demonstrating multiple addictions or cross-addictions is to use harm reduction strategies to have them walk down the continuum of harm while chipping away at the root causes of their addiction(s). The order can differ from person to person, but substance use & gambling are typically the first battles I tackle, followed by food-based addictions, then porn, then social media, videogames, general screen time, and lastly the smaller addictive behaviors. Again, the addiction treatment simply does not work in a vacuum though, you have to be helping to cure the root causes. Also, the success rate for quitting multiple addictions at once while also trying to live a full life (aka not going to rehab or be in a rehabilitation type period where you're utilizing literally 100% of your time and effort to recover) is abysmally low, like well below a single % point.
Thank you Dr K❤❤❤
This is very interesting topic and helped me remind some keypoints in mental and substance abuse services field of social work.
And also explained something of my own life: when I stopped drinking (wasn’t heavy drinker but I clearly selfmedicated with beer or two here and there), I noticed after couple months that my overall performance went worse over time. I wondered why is it like that: isn’t stopping drinking supposed to improve my performance?
After 6-7 months of soberness I had a long and good talk with my friend, who has ADHD. After the talk I decided to start the diagnostic progress: And got diagnosed with ADHD after a year. And that diagnose explained so much from the past and the selfmedication with drinking beer. Stimulant medication has helped alot with the symptoms and nowadays I am more aware of my different behaviors and neurochemical inconvenience, I can manage the ”med holidays” pretty well… but still some days are bad and I try to plan ahead those days that I don’t need to be fully functional for anything special.
1 day sober lfg
This enlightens me so much. Thank you, dr k
True virtue is the fine balance between vices.
Going on week 2 cold turkey. The first week is always the worst to get through.
Happy 420 folks
"this is what you'll use to feel better" *actively taking a rip*
i am someone who occassionally uses comfort food, but my main vice is my social media addiction. On multiple occasions i have found myself going back to it again and again, its annoying. Same with foods like sugary crunchy peanut butter, cheese, carbs like bread and pasta, and sometimes even certain types of vegetables, especially carrots lol, bc/ i tell myself they are healthy, so its okay. I often eat til i am so bloated that it hurts to sit, and sometimes even lean in certain positions and breath. Based on my size its hard to tell i use food as a coping mechanism, but my mum also has the same problem sadly, and she too is at a healthy BMI. I'm guessing tho it might be bc/ we both cope with vegetables and fruit and typcially healthy foods, but its still an issue i have, and it rlly annoys me. Social media however, thats only something i use, but i always found it to help, but then i also always spend way too long on it i then get depressed or i look at other people enjoying life and then get jealous. Also, on multiple occasions i cope by procrasting my sleep, something my mum has also done, which affects my menstral cycle, appetite by leading to me eat more food. My family also has a history with alchol addiction luckly i don't drink and never intend to start either. Oh, i also like walking and dancing as a form of exercise, but when ever i spend too long on social media, i sometimes don't leave my house for days, and on occasion weeks.
On multiple occasions i have tried to quit technology, i go into a much larger food addiction, often to cope with boredom.
I need to find more porductive ways to cope, such as walking, or weight lifting, or even listening to music helps. Actually, at the moment, i like writing, an organising. That is one of my more healthier addictions, often spending hours just moving things around lol., or hours even writing and planning :) Sometimes even journalling helps too, bc/ i like writing so much, or drawing helps also, i am good and drawing thats why. also have tried mindfullness too.
Stress, boredom, guilt, and anxiety are my main reasons for these coping mechanisms
The worst is the feedback loop, like you use pornography, which eventually messes with your head enough that you don't think it'll be possible to have a relationship, so you have a negative emotion tied to that, so how can you cope with that? Why more pornography of course!
sad
It tries to lie to you and rationalize using whatever drug it is
And then you start rationalizing that if you distract yourself with that quickly enough, instead of wasting days trying to identify a vid, then you motivate yourself to finish fast and continue with your plans. And then rational thoughts return and you're even more ashamed because you would totally be embarrassed if you quick-shotted with a girl, so you're not even relaxed anymore.
Physiologic Withdrawal
Depressant - gaba receptor
Cardiac arrhythmia
Opioid receptors
Constipating
Coping mechanisms - negative emotion
Porn/video game addiction
Dopamine spurts
Upswing of negative states
Self injurious behavior
Negative emotional state - state of physical pain
Impulsive buying behavior
Emotionally manipulative tactics
Healthy coping mechanisms
Meditation lower stress
Default mode network
Cortisol
Internal emotional stuff
Internal work
Insecurity
Seeking love
History of trauma
Emotional needs that get met
I feel like this is how I am. I become addicted to people, substances and almost anything easily. I've been diagnosed as BPD and Bipolar. I feel like there's narcissism in me too. I can't fully quit alcohol and weed. I have no friends and I feel like it's getting harder to talk to people. I'm becoming more recluse. I need weed to be able to have the motivation to go to the gym. I work out 5 days a week but when I work out I take edibles or I don't find the motivation. I used to hook up a lot from Grindr. I don't know what's going on I feel worse.
That sounds really tough to be working with. Wish you luck in working through it!
Quitting Canabis during my heaviest time of use, I definitely had physiologic withdrawal symptoms. For 2 weeks I would wake up during the night drenched in sweat, have sweaty hands and headaches. Might have been quitting tobacco, but I quit nicotine some time later for good and had no symptoms.
This video compliments yesterdays video very well - thank you 🙏
Addiction has a very specific meaning, and I think the push to redefine that word to include everything someone doesn't like is purely an effort to allow the application of circular, abusive AA style rhetoric to that activity. Nobody's ever been accused of being addicted to reading books, staring at the wall, or playing football, because those things are socially acceptable and safe activities, even when done to unhealthy degrees. And there isn't a religion teaching that those things are bad driving narratives about them.
My new addiction: Healthy Gamer GG videos.
I noticed that the easiest way to break an addiction it to do it co consciously, and just enough not to feel miserable, not enough to get you high. Because if you feel miserable, your brain switches to autopilot and stops asking you for a permission to use the substance you are using. In this state of mind, you'll definitely abuse your substance of choice. However if you are conscious and use just a little bit before you go into the autopilot mode you will feel not as bad of withdrawals, and at the same time teaching you that this thing doesn't give you that much high overall.
I know that I am ridiculously sugar addicted and this video got me thinking: what negative emotion is causing me to overeat? I couldn't figure it out for a bit because my overeating sugary foods is almost always after dinner, so I can't think of a negative circumstance that would trigger it. But then I remembered: when I was bullied intensely in middle school, I felt especially lonely/unwanted during lunch hearing everyone else talking and laughing, and I would often buy a bunch of cookies from the cafeteria and just keep eating them until the lunch period was over. It's loneliness! The time I was eating the healthiest was my first two years of college, when I had a consistent group of friends that I regularly spent time with. Over covid I lost contact with all of those friends and have been extremely lonely, and in that time I have also gotten worse about over-eating sugary foods. It's so hard to make friends though so I'm probably going to stay sugar-addicted for a while :(
Holy shit, you just made me have a 'penny-drop-moment'! I think I binge eat out of loneliness too.
I have a hard time connecting with people, and when I come home after hanging out I feel like such an alien compared to them and that's when I binge. I've been avoiding hanging out with people because of it which made me even more lonely and eat even more.
I'm not sure how to use this info yet but it must be a step in the right direction?
Anyway thanks a bunch for sharing your experience, you've actually helped me a lot. I hope things get better for you!
Same exact thing loneliness bullying made me avoid people ... gotta spend time someway so binge eat ... family is emotionally abusive don't want to see them over lunch or dinner order some unhealthy shit and eat alone
Hope you’re doing better these days ❤
@@phi1s0n I'm still hopelessly sugar addicted but I got into graduate school and will be doing much better very soon
Ohh absolutely recognise the connection between food addiction and insomnia. I tend to eat more to feel better during periods when I cannot sleep well. I've had several addictions I will not specify but by far the most difficult to leave behind is the one to my phone. Can you talk about information/social media/phone (whatever it's actually called) addiction?
Thank you so much for removing twitch chat from your videos!!! I found it annoying and unnecessary, and also I ran into a situation where I thought an adult acquaintance, who is dealing with a son that plays a lot of video games to the detriment of his sleep, could benefit greatly from the info on this channel, but I was worried that the chat would confuse her and drive her away from using the content here. The videos are much cleaner and more presentable without the constant scrolling and often crass nature of chat. THANK YOU THANK YOU!!!!
What you said about depression not feeling sad and manifesting as anger. Damn...
great insight!
Im not boutta watch all this but the thumbnail exhibits my mornings perfectly.
Coffee, nicotine, games
My problem is that I feel worthless as a man because I got rejected by every single woman I was interested in (which number in the hundreds by now). My dream is to have a loving wife and kids to come home to, someone to be there for me when I need it the most, someone to travel and see the world with, someone to grow old with, and the universe simply won't let me have that. Apparently I have to be happy by myself first before I can be happy with someone else, but I just can't. I can't. And the fact that I see unhappy people still ending up finding love and relationships kills me. So I bounce between weed, porn and games to cope. They're what enables me to get up, earn a paycheck and go out to talk to girls even though all of it only adds up to more rejections for me to throw on the pile.
If only I had someone in my life who loved me, my life would be so much better and I'd be pulled out of the darkness, but alas I'm still left to wander the earth with a purpose I can't fulfill.
Rejected by hundreds of women?! You sure are dedicated to finding love. Best of luck with that!
Just know: If you stake your entire happiness on another person, the weight of that obligation will be entirely suffocating to that person.
@@Dimitris_Half Unhelpful
@@Dimitris_Half Agreed, but encouraging a stranger in their romantic endeavours doesn’t make me (or them) an incel
@@Dimitris_Half I believe incels can benefit from a bit of sympathy just as much as anyone else. Now there IS a line not to cross between sympathy and full-on enabling, and I try my best to keep that in mind when interacting with potentially “problematic” people. Anyway, it was good arguing with you
As I’m cross faded in a bar, just got off dealing blackjack for 8 hours, about to go home and play Xbox…. I feel this video found me
I love how sciency you got in this video. 😊❤
funny thing is (i think) i know my source of addiction which is school anxiety
problem is I'm not sure how to fix the underlying issue other than just "cope better"
the straightforward answer would be just to actually work hard, can't have anxiety if all the work is done
i know i have the skill to do it, it's just for some reason this past 2 years, my drive to work just crashed
most of my friend told me that, "at this point man, the only solution is just to suck it up, and do it"
which I'm inclined to agree, but for some reason has been so hard to do
I was waiting for this topic, lets see
Should look into CHS. It’s when you chronically use weed and it eventually causes prolonged nausea and irritation until you abstain from smoking while riding a week of no eating and hell.
i can confirm that selfH will be mostly used to "re-focus". it's like touching a misbehaving dog, ideally done without any harmful intent. i'd prefer chili though. the burn is calculatable, the amount is calculatable, overdoses may just result in unwanted delayed selfH and it comes without staying scars.
Sometimes I feel like my addictions are like many layers of paint on a painting and I forgot what the original coat even was.
Very smart guy,thank you for everything!
Personally I'm a collector. Caffeine, nicotine, habitual drinking, weed, psychedelics, gaming, youtube, watching the same movies and series year after year...
My dopamine addiction combined with porn is really messing me up right now. I feel like I'm trying to escape from reality by binging shows or movies
You arent addicted to dopamine. Dopamine is the neuro chemical that drives you to do anything. Like say be motivated to eating some food you get a spike of dopamine in the brain. But you dont get addicted to dopamine
I am grateful for what you teach me
sitting here literally drinking because i'm stressed about something i need to do at work tomorrow... the irony
Happy belated 4/20 gamers!
Great video to drop on 420 🤣🤣💀
I'm realizing the connection between me overcoming several of my addictions and some of the issues that followed. It makes so much more sense now, knowing that it just takes time is so important
I went from music, to the card game yugioh, to league of legends, to black desert online... and I've looped back to league. Not sure I can actually kick it. Been telling myself for 6-7 years "If I don't make diamond this year, I'll quit." hehe here I am still grinding in season 12 :')
Just the THUMBNAIL of this video called me out 😂
For me, marijuana is not an addictive substance. It tends to make me overthink and self reflect which enforces a positive change in my outlook. I do also have a p0rn addiction which is triggered during high levels of anxiety. I only tend to smoke when I have a clear plate and low anxiety levels.
Same for me. Smoking started when I was stressed in college. But after my life changed it goes off and on but recently I've been thinking about it forms a gateway to smoking tobacco (black and milds). Which didnt help. It got so bad I cant smoke weed sometimes without a black, I cant breathe or sleep without either sometimes neither.
It’s too hard to be aware of the issue long enough to change anything in a fast enough time, how do we become more present and aware of our internal experience, it’s like I need someone to remind me
Great video. This was incredibly helpful for me!
very well explained!
Great content, your videos are primo
Dr. Huberman is very good
He is experienced in neurology - and I learned a lot about what & why my brain does what it does.👈🏼
The unintentional asmr love it from 9:40 ish 😂❤
You guys gotta start linking these songs on the intro, theyre amazing
I hate watching this channel. I can't internalize anything so all I'm left with is binge watching these talks with no effort on my end to improve. So I guess I hate myself lol
i am from p*rn addiction, became gym addiction.
I wouldn't list video games as an addiction for me, personally. I can go and play a game for an hour or 2, and then move on with my life. I may not play again until the following day, next week or next month, and I don't feel that addiction. There are some games that I enjoy more than others, and before I know it, half of the day is gone, but not at the expense of more important things.