How to Know If You're Transgender | How I knew | mtf
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- Опубліковано 14 тра 2023
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Wish I was young now, trans is more accepted. When I was young in the 70's and 80's it was so looked down upon
IT'S STILL LOOKED DOWN UPON.
Don’t I’d yourself !
There’s never a “to late in life” to change your expression, or pronouns, or anything - especially if it would cause you to feel happier or more comfortable in yourself! You may not have as many medical opportunities for transitioning, idk, but there’s absolutely no age limit for living as you🤗
I'm 1976 and I recall trans people being more accepted. Maybe not legally but there are many interviews on UA-cam where they were treated with genuine interest. Now, I'll informed and I'll meaning folk think they know more about it than trans people.
Incidentally, I'm seeing the doctor in 2 hours for a referral 😊
Imbecile!
I relate to this quite a lot. I spent an inordinate amount of time as a kid thinking about transforming into a girl, avoiding male spaces and habits, and being disappointed with my exclusion from female social circles. I spent my twenties deeply unfulfilled and exploring femininity in tabletop roleplaying games. It took getting on meds for depression and OCD, combined with relating to every transfem meme on egg_irl, to realize what exactly was wrong.
I am almost 40, I am intersex/trans. I never felt good about myself or who I am till I started researching ancient Civilizations and there beliefs of 3rd gender. I became really interested in how the church went from the viewpoint of 3rd gender people are the closest to god to 3rd gender is evil. Turns out before the crusades the church was all about reincarnation and encouraging children to remember there past lives. 3rd gender was seen as the spirit living several past lives as 1 gender and decided to live the current as another gender for new experiences so trans was the longing of a past body with a current life mission of seeing thru the eyes of male and female and exposing corruption for nobody is superior to another making male, female and 3rd gender as the original "holy trinity" the balance. When the crusades happened is when the church was shifting from religion to a political stance becoming what we view the cia of today as. The church turned on 3rd gender making them sx slaves because there own doctrine states that church officials shall not bed with male or female but does not state 3rd gender. The church also started using 3rd gender as spies and as tools to destabilize those the church did not like. It was also believed that someone of the 3rd gender was murdered in there past life. I at first didn't believe any of the spiritual stuff till I had my own experience that left me looking at my own body from a past life where as child I would draw and speak of things that I never could have experienced As a child. In my mid 30s by total accident I made discovery and that forced a spontaneous spiritual awakening that was a 6 month long nightmare.
@@Lysis729 Jesus is alive, there is no 3rd gender.
Only 2, intersex is a rare condition.
Even in intersex we can see there are only 2.
"God so loved the world that he gave his one and only Son, that whoever believes in him shall not perish but have eternal life" John 3:16
@GodSoLoved.Yeshua Jesus died over 2000 years ago... lol what are you on?😂😂😂
@@V-A-L-A-K 🥳 You are loved. Read the historical documents, we have thousands of manuscripts more than any ancient literature.
You can know him in this day and age.
It's not a story, it's not a myth, it's true. Jesus is alive, he rose again for you 🥳👏
@@GodSoLoved.Yeshua You claim to know anything especially about gender yet you're the same one who is tripping that the bio live tissue has been living for thousands of years .. nuff said. Tell your god and jesus to f off so that the few sane people on this planet could actually do something to solve the problems and the bloodshed and destruction those like you have made.
I remember for me, it all started in puberty. I never felt I had any reason to question my gender when I was younger. And then when I was around 14, a few years into puberty, it all just escalated. I felt immensely jealous of the girls in my school, I daydreamed about having breasts intensely, but I thought it was just "part of attraction" and "everyone wants breasts".
I'm 21 now and I still conflate gender envy and attraction all the time. I still present masc irl, but I don't associate with masculinity, I hate everything puberty's done and I hate masc products/how they are advertised. I feel like I kinda can imagine myself as a girl but also kinda can't, though the thought of growing into a man feels horrible. I still doubt excessively, thinking "but I do really want this?", stressing about potential regret etc. Having counselling currently which does help, but it's hard not knowing what the future's going to look like.
I feel the same way too. I never thought about gender when I was younger until middle school. I've always liked talking with girls in middle school (also because I was attracted to them) but also I liked their hair and how they talked and I liked the clothes they wore. Guys were always so rude and mean and when I hang out with the girls or some of my girlfriends they were nice and respectful and I felt like I related to them in some way.
When I thought I might be trans was at the end of middle school. It confused me for a while and still kind of does. I could never ever look in the mirror and felt so horrible inside and hated myself. I started to experiment in high school (early on) and wear clothes and change my name to a girl name and I loved it from the start. And wearing wigs and makeup helps so much for me. I can tell looking into the future I can see myself as a girl and when I think of myself as a guy it's not that interesting for me. I don't feel happy or angry but seeing myself as a girl in girl clothes and swimsuits I prefer.
It can also stem from trauma, just a thought.
@@GodSoLoved.Yeshua Huh ... then by now all women and feminine looking men and kids and animals should have been trans due to the trauma men and those like you have caused them. "Just a thought". Again, you religious nuts, take your religions of delusions and hallucinations and regression and bloodshed and cruelty and hate and ugliness and keep it SHUT and CONFINED to your own heads until you get those heads checked and monitored by the pros.
dont expect anyone to accept you when you cant accept yourself
are we the same person???
The part where you (horrifically) envision yourself as an old person in your assigned sex at birth, really hit home with me. That’s what originally cracked my egg, but much later in life. I grew up in the 80s, in an ultra conservative environment. We didn’t have the Internet, or anything like that to even put a name to what was going on. I grew up, thinking that I was born, defective, and I would never find joy in who I was. Now in my 50s, I am finally where I need to be.
I feel like I could live without transitioning but I don't think I can be happy, I don't think I can love myself and I will always regret it if I don't. I can see the effects it has had on my life to live without really living. I had a strong urge to transition at 25 (before that I knew I was different but I didn't understand what it might be) but talked myself out of it because I read that a person shouldn't transition unless their only other choice was to kill themselves. Now I'm starting HRT this week at 41.
I felt fairly similar, and started my HRT 3 months ago at 39😊
I will say that this is something that I wanted for a long time and now I am so glad I did it! I feel much more emotionally than ever before and it is life changing. I never knew I could feel things this intensely. It feels like I just woke up from a massive slumber of numbness.
39 next month, 36 when I started cautiously with just t-blocking for half a year after talking to a therapist for a while after actively questioning for years.
I got the absolutely stellar advice 'it's your gender, play around with it to figure out what you want' and that's exactly what I've been doing. Most of the changes from hormones alone are reversible, and slow. Only boobs (for transfemmes) and voice change (for transmascs) are permanent, and even those can be avoided by just starting with blockers before doing any replacement. Reducing T alone felt good and I was gradually all in on trying e. Now I'm honestly just upset it's not going faster! 😝
I'm still not sure what my end goals will be, but I keep taking more steps that make me happy at each step and despite my worries (even going bald before I was 30) there's been nothing I regret or that I would take back since I started and in fact I keep doing and trying more (and more successfully) that I like and that makes me happy.
Honestly, my only regret was that I didn't start earnestly questioning sooner. and I might have if people when I was growing up talked about or understood the trans experience then. Because while I was not the clearest case, nor the most common experience, there were plenty of signs... Enough so that it's now become a running gag sarcastically claiming "clearly, there were no signs..."
As a straight guy who has been wanting to properly understand trans people for a little while and mostly landing on right-wing media your content has been fascinating. I had no idea that trans people have difficulty/dread imagining themselves as an adult still as their biological sex, for example. And I must say you pass as quite an attractive woman!
Bro do you need a new pair of knee pads?
@@LaSombraa I think you do, why are you here then?
I meet a "straight" guy at a party, he was so cute, handsome with the sweetest eyes, which ours did happen to meet. He worked his way through the others and was so chatty with all the guys, I thought that was sweet. Well to make a long story short we got to know each other and him knowing I was transsexual seemed to intrigue him. Before I knew it he had me! He changed my life
You are not “straight” if you find him attractive.
@@bigdaddyjehu I hope you'll recover from being such a hateful and sad person. You're missing out on kindness and wisdom. You hate, you lose.
I'm not even trans but I find this very interesting. And I'm sorry about what you went through before the transition. Sounds like a 24/7 mental prison, that dysphoria.
It is a dysphoria, it is a mental prison, to think removing your pen-is will somehow make you a woman is ludacris. It's biologically impossible.
Gender dysphoria is categorized as a mental illness.
This was my childhood exactly, but sadly I was born 20 years earlier when we were considered by society to be filth. My parents are deeply homophobic and there was no information or support at all for us back then. I didn't even get over the self hate for being so broken until 2002 when my endless late night online research found a physiological explanation for my dysphoria that wasn't simply "you're sick in the head". But gatekeeping was still in full swing and I was denied access to HRT at age 28 because the medical profession was still homophobic and trans healthcare didn't properly exist. I tried to DIY but it became impossible to continue after about 7 months so I just accepted my lot and that transition would never be possible for me. Back then 28 was also considered much too late to begin transition. I wouldn't be legally able to transition for another 10 years but by then I was married and trying to have kids, run a business and basically work 16 hours per day. The workaholism kept the dysphoria at bay. My mind was so full with other concerns. I wish I hadn't become so good at "managing" because it was ultimately my breakdown that took me over the edge whereupon I discovered that "informed consent" had happened, that the DSM was gone and that we could now get the help I had needed for over 40 years.I finally began my transition again at 47. I am so happy that a generation of Mathildas didn't have to endure what I did, but seeing them so happy, able to have what I fought so hard for and still couldn't have, leaves me so heartbroken even though I finally have some peace. The world could very easily slip back to that of my childhood, where I feared for my future if my own parents were to discover my secret. Please don't be just an onlooker that allows that to happen, for your own childrens' sake if noone else's. Stand up for trans kids and our right to a life of happiness like everyone else.
I felt the same as you. I wanted to be just like you. I new i always felt different. One Halloween my girlfriend dressed me up as a woman. When i saw my self for the first time. I new from that point on i wanted to be a woman. I started dressing up all the time. But wanted more finally i came out as trans. I love being a woman. Would not have it another way. I know how you feel. You are such amazing and beautiful woman. Thank you for all the great information.
I just realized the biggest reason I have been in the questioning stage for the longest time is because I can't express myself at all around my family. Not even my non trans self. They don't even know who I really am at all. I don't know why this is the case, I can easily be myself around friends/coworkers. But around my family, I'm introverted, very quiet- basically mute. So that literally is the biggest block in the way of me getting used to who I really am
That itself is a pretty strong sign you know what you want and are just afraid to pursue it... I will say that the more you try things out and embrace what you want, the easier it becomes to be your authentic self around others and for that energy to shine through to others. I have heard so many stories from supportive family and friends saying that transitioning helped others 'be more happy and more themselves' and I've personally found myself much better able to express myself and what I'm feeling in multiple levels.
I have just been one month on HRT! 🥰 I am a happy transgender woman who loves herself and loves everything that is beautiful!
Watching these kind of videos makes me realize that I might not be trans, but just a man who can embrace his feminine side and who doesn't care about fitting into the role model of what society deems a man should be. Idk what the label for that would be, but yeah... These kind of videos don't just help trans people, but also people like me. Thank you :)
Non-binary, or just cis-gender, but gender non-conforming.
Nathaniel gave you modern descriptors. But you are just being you. Gender in reality is fluid. Society makes it rigid. Follow your own. I do my sewing.
Loving your videos! They are so helpful. Thank you! I hope you’re well
Your throat looks amazing, I can't even see a scar.
Thank you!!!
She is beautiful ❤
Can't tell if this is honest or not. But I am jealous of her. I am afraid my family will disown me. Everyone says let them go, but I love my family and I don't want the rejection so I am still in the closet, but I want to change my gender and name
@@lukemitchell1975it's a he
@@thunderverse1043No
Sweetheart matilda you are amazing woman love you so much you are a valid valuable you are beautiful inside and out
girl thats a whole man 💀💀. yu cant change ur gender whenever you please too. its literally impossible
I thought you were never coming back to UA-cam. It’s so great to see you again Mathilda.😎
Wow! Such openness. I am so sorry you had to go through all of this. Have a beautiful day.
The first time i see a sponsor and drop everywhere ive struggle with disgusting body hair for a very long time nothing works on it and when i finals actually get it shaved down at the cost of the tool's durability its starts growing back immediately the next day its so frustrating thankfully this seems like its worth giving a shot
I love your hair and your use of hair slips. Soooooooo cute! 💙
Thank you, Mathilda! Always wise words. ❤😊
great video sis!
I'm finding myself in so many things you, or other trans creators said and I'm really convinced that I'm trans and i feel like i even kinda came in terms with it, but at the back of my mind there's always the little voice which makes me question everything, like "what if I'll regret it later on", "what if i can live as a woman (I'm ftm)" "what if you come out to everyone and then you change your mind" etc. and it's just killing me.
I'm a borderline case which is making me nuts. I hate being seen as a man, the core of my being feels strongly feminine, have hated what puberty did to my body and responded by dissociating and becoming invisible. Spent almost ten years in depression where I didn't see any future for myself at all. Then finally I figured that in the world of my dreams, and in a future I feel worth striving for, I am a woman. However, I still suppressed that for multiple years after.
Now, I feel like I have two possible futures: either I transition (which, ironically, seems like the easier alternative), or become the best possible man-like being I could possibly be (I've been joking to myself that this would be the ideal male character as written by a woman). I've delayed transitioning for so long that I've created a stable and loving environment for myself which would be in jeopardy if I started now. Also, there's something worthwhile in the ideal man endeavour too, which I could actually relate to. It's weird.
you have such an amazing story, I empathize with your experience and I am so happy you're using this platform to share what you went through to understand your gender - from a cis-gendered women
I was struggling with my thoughts about going trans. When II started watching these videos, I feel ready to come out to my family. You have really helped me understand myself and I am ready. Thanks @MathildaHogberg and if you dont see this, I dont mind.
I remember thinking as a teen about how maybe one day when I’m old that the technology would be there for me to be a woman/transition, I also kinda thought that this was maybe something everyone though of at times. I had never been exposed to anything about trans people before and didn’t understand that that was something that was feasible at the time. I didn’t really get exposed to anything about the trans experience or what was available for transition until my 20’s and at that time it finally hit me all the way that i was a trans woman. I wish that i had have been exposed to this information earlier in life, or even just had taken the initiative to look online, but i just didn’t understand that what i was feeling was different than cis people.
This 100%. If I'd only known what was available whilst I was still a teenager. I'm very envious of the ppl growing up today with all this information easily stumbled upon. Now it's to late for me. I'm to much of a coward so I'd rather remain closeted than non passable. That or wait and hope they'll find some way to change bone structure.
I got a question do you need to take gender therapy in order to take estrogen? Cause I’ve been having gender dysphoria ever since I was 13 and like I’ve always wanted to take estrogen but then I was told to wait till I was 18 to do so and right now I’m 17
Yes. You need to see a Gender Therapist in order to be recognised as having Gender Dysphoria. The Therapist will also be able to sign the paperwork for you to see an endocrinologist (hormone doctor) who will do tests on your blood levels and tell you what dosage of hormones would be safe to take. The endocrinologist will supply you with Spirolactone (Testosterone blockers) and Estriodol (Estrogen).
Thank you so much for sharing your experiences. There was so much you said that I related to, and find it reassuring to know that others felt similar to how I've always struggled to accept about myself. Even before puberty I was jealous of girls and wished I could dress and live like they did. Finding myself wishing I could be just like they were. Always thinking that there was something fundamentally wrong with me. I am now coming to understand and accept what was really true. You are a beautiful woman and a great inspiration for true self accptance and a comforting guide to confused girls like myself. Thank you.
Thank you for sharing your story about your life mathilda i wish you every success in life 🙂
Im 38ys old and im only just exploring myself, my gender and wished il would have been true to myself long time age. Instead ive just suppressed my feelings and lived a lie my whole life. I relate to you sayin something was wrong in are chilhoods but i didnt know how to say what was wrong but i knew i felt different. I grow up ashamed of my body, felt inadequate and knew this was not normal. I hate everything about luke and look forward to becoming my true self. Thank you for your info
for a second I thought you said you were 38days old lol
In the UK they're now using conversion therapy tactics as part of the state run healthcare system. I think your advice about therapy can really depend on the country or region you're in. I have experienced these tactics used and would encourage anyone to pick up on the signs before entering therapy if you live somewhere where this is happening.
Beware, healthcare professionals may now ask difficult questions you don't want to address instead of rubber stamping your lifelong medicalisation
Since i was little i always had a voice in my head saying that i would be happier or i would feel more comfortable if i was a girl. I also used to ask my friends if they felt the same way and they didnt. As i was growing up i kinda developed an attitude to like defence myself 24/7 as i didnt know how i would react to some comments and things. Fast forward to about 2-2.5 years ago when i went to pride parade here in my town and after that i started thinking about my gender more seriously (i was a enby gender fluid) and the event that made me think about it even more it was that i fell in love with a guy to thepoint in where it was an obsession. We lasted together for like a week. After that i was devastated but thanks to him i realized that i feel more comfortable as a girl than i was a non binary amab. Last year in november i met a girl who helps me getting through all of this, even if she doesnt fully understand me. I have to say that thanks to her i am more happier, even tho im not on hrt due to my family not supporting me (conservatives) and because im only 16 i dont know if in my country i can get hormones without an adult permission (we had a law here in Spain that said that people can change their gender a lot easier now and children from 12 can get hrt without adult permission but know i dont know).
I think ill be updating this as the time goes by.
(Sorry for my bad english btw)
It started very early for me. I thought about it a lot although I did not at the time fully understand it. When I was eight I was put in therapy for severe depression where they attempted to "fix" me to be what I was "born as". When I was in my late teens I was able to start expressing more fem and got affirming supportive therapy when helped not only with my depression but I was able to start learning about being my transition. Finally, I was able to begin hormone therapy and just this year have been able to bottom surgery. Got another surgery coming up in August and even though operations make me nervous I'm looking forward to it. Thank you for another wonderful upload. :)
how is your stinky perpetually infected wound doing?
@@kingericson490 The same you are surviving after colon cancer your dad gave you. 😂
A lot of it has been more recent in my early teens and I just want to be the opposite sexs (mtf) and I live in a very religious family and can't tell anyone but recently have found some people similar and I think that when I turn 18 I will just leave and do what I want with my life. A lot of it has been wanting to dress like a female and act like it. I will always be with girl and wanted to be like them
Helpful, informative video!
Hopefully in the near future we will be able to understand and diagnose this better. To make the decision to transistion easier.
thank you so much for making this
Ok, so how I knew I was trans, well I didn't know I was trans but I knew something was off. I never felt comfortable as my assigned gender. I was like 10 and I just knew that I didn't like who I was. I wanted to change places with my sister. I wished I could have been born a girl. It was so hard growing up because my dad didn't raise no sissies. I was pushed into more boy oriented things like sports. I hated it, I just wanted to play with my sisters things like dolls and tea sets. I wasn't even allowed to show any emotions or wear pink. Those are girl things and again, he didn't raise no sissies. I didn't even cry when he passed away when I was 16. He didn't raise no sissies. Back then being trans wasn't a thing, I had no idea what I was, so I lived in secrete for years dressing and wearing makeup, just doing all the things I was told was wrong but felt right. it wasn't until was in my 50s that I found out what being trans was. after watching UA-cam creators like Mathilda that I realized that there was nothing wrong with me, and that there was a name for just who I was. It took a lot for me to make an appointment with my therapists, and after 4 sessions, she diagnosed me with gender dysphoria. I wasn't sure I wanted to start HRT, That took me months before I started on hormones. They changed my life, I feel so much more happy, I've lost weight, I have more friends, I'm happy to go out into public. Before, I stayed inside my house only to go out to work and shop for food. You know deep down if you're transgender. You can't lie to yourself. If you have questions, my advice is to make an appointment with a therapist, you need someone you can trust that can help you find yourself. Please don't wait, I did and I feel like 50 years of happiness was robbed from me. Don't let that happen to you, it really sucks.
I'm sorry you had to go through having such a "father". :(
And I'm glad you found your way eventually. :)
@@tobe3940 thank you.
What a beautiful woman,I can only hope to end up with someone like you with such a beautiful personality inside and out.
For me, in 2020 when i was around 13 or 13 going 13 it was the first lockdown, so i had alot of time by myself and i had trans thoughts where the feeling of being the opposite gender would give me comfort, but it also made me scared to tell my parents about it.
I made a plan to leave notes around my house explaining it as i was too scared to comfront them myself, i thought it wouldve been easier for them to approach me. And so, they sounded annoyed and mad, and that i was mentally ill and if i felt like that they wouldve sent me up for adoption cause they couldnt have a son who wanted to be a girl.
For the next two weeks i cried the thought away, well atleast i thought i did.
Now and again after a few months or so id have sperts of thoughts about it but i always brushed it off because i thought it was wrong and "not who i am". I am now 16 going 17 in almost a month now, ive finally learnt to accept it and ive came forward to a few of my online friends, and they have accepted me which is boosting my confidence abit so thats good i guess :)
I plan on telling my most trusted person in my family, my nan shes really nice but i find it convenient how the person who is the oldest in my family that i know of (shes 82 btw) is probably the least homophobic & have a very more advanced mindset compared to even people in this generation which actually shows alot, i love her with my whole heart so if theres a physical person i wanna tell, its gonna be her.
I'll probably forget about this comment so if you would like any updates just reply to this comment and I'll let you all know :)
Welcome back Mathilda!
You transitioned perfectly, i can hardly tell you were a boy. I love how far you came
I GOT A KETCH BEAUTY AD RIGHT AFTER THE SPONSORSHIP
Everything sounds extremely familiar except when I grew up there were no awareness of transgender people and I had no words to describe my experience. I didn't have a gender identity as a child, but I enjoyed dressing up in my mom's clothes and imagined that I would be like her when I was an adult. I also loved to play the girl roles when playing make belief and such. Starting to school I got very disappointed when the teacher told me I couldn't use the girls bathroom at school. I then started to realize that I wasn't like the other boys and didn't know how to be like them. I wanted to be with the girls but wasn't allowed to so instead I isolated myself. Yes, I was jealous of the girls for being able to be girls. I wished that I had been born a girl, but I also assumed that this was perfectly normal and that everyone had those thoughts. Yes, I assumed that every single boy really wanted to be a girl. I never told anyone because I thought it was normal and everyone else was just doing a better job at coping with it. I couldn't image a future for in my assigned gender. I could intellectually reason on what I needed to do to survive in adulthood, but it was impossible to visualize myself in the future and what I would be doing.
After transistion was kind of normalized in US states and some countries in EU the number of transitioners have grown much so actually yes I suppose a great number of boys want to be girls, - many more just dream about how that would be, and there are many other attitudes. People who are brought up with strict kind of oldschool easily become haters. -- The comments here are interesting, I think they support the assumption that haters have a block of some kind.
You literally brainwashed yourself to think that, you are a man.
For me it was the growing old as a man I could not imagine that ever it's not me but I didn't notice it much when I was 18 so I was mostly okay still had some issues especially things I wanted to do and didn't get to do and how I thoughts. but pretty much around 25 is when i felt really bad kept getting worse until I was 28 that point I didn't want to "play the game anymore" so I talked to another doctor took me four months finally started two and a half weeks ago so far spiro only in a month will add E I believe.
Like if I grew old like my mom nice my dad rage quit. Though I'm non binary, much more feminine, demigirl, Girlie enby, Transfemme.
I don’t know if I’m trans but I feel mad inside about how I look as “male” but it doesn’t sit right with me at all and I’ve never cried over but I’m legit so confused 🥲
I don't know how rare this is, but I have body dysmorphia as well.
But I Male to Female, I want to be both, where I live I've no idea if they would do something like that.
But yea I wish to be both and have everything still down there working fully and all that stuffs. Also I've had this in the back of my mind for like 10 years now.
you are soo pretty!!
You are absolutely gorgeous. I wish I could be half as beautiful. It is amazing how close your experience has been to mine. I went through a lot of the same things around the same age. I would love to fully transition, but puberty was not as kind to me. I am above average size for a man, and could never be passable, no matter how much I want to be. I am trying to figure out the next step in my life, but I have yet to determine what I am going to do in life, or how I am going to do it. Sometimes I just wish that life was easy, lol. Transitioning is incredibly difficult because there are so many variables you have to overcome, particularly if you aren't passable.
Thank you for this I just found out I am so thank you for informing me about this
I've been in transition for two years now.
MTF transgender.❤
ew
@@licuid4536 Yeah. It got gross seeing your trollkind here
Males can't turn into females. It's biologically impossible.
🏳️⚧️❤️ Transgender!
Tf
I just want to say that you are such a wonderful person and I love you very very much. You are a source of happiness and hope for many women and people. I have learned a lot from you. I am officially a woman for 7 years now. I am really still learning from people like you. I am very grateful for every video on your channel. I wish you and the people you love a happy life. and keep it up bestie we're really love you! ❤
Thanks for your efforts
Oh how badly i want to be out as a woman. The only one in my life that knows is my future wife. She has been supportive and wants me to move at my own pace. I could really use that hair removal thingy 😂. Too bad im so broke i cant ever start hrt to begin with. Wish me luck and send love. Keep trans people alive!
I just came out out to my parents today and looking back I can relate to all of these
how sad, being so brainwashed
@@halafloquet Yeah. Brainwashed into thinking you're something that you really weren't. The freedom of mind is where people discover their real selves and not what they are seeing in the physical realm. Coming out and realizing who you truly are isn't brainwashing and the idea of it being so is just heartless and cruel.
@@makimusic1826 Dats crazy but a man is always a man and a woman is always a woman. A man cant feel like a woman because a woman is a state of being that has no feeling, woman is a biological reality. So a man can only feel what they think a woman feels like. Thus if i man transitions to be a girl then they arent being their true self because they think they are a girl. so yeah your basically brainwashed if your a man who thinks they are a girl.
@@halafloquetok boomer
Hello,I have been crossdressing since I was 4yrs old.I have been questioning myself for about 10yrs now.I was dressed by my mother and my
sister when I was adopted at 3months old and went to school as a girl up til about the 8th grade.But anyways I feel that I am transgender male wanting to transition to female.I am 55yrs old now I never got the transition done but I can not afford the hormones and estrogen everyday.I did watch your video about having the hormones and estrogen it was very interesting.What do you think about me being transgender.And can I keep up with being more feminine.I really want to be a woman and live everyday as a woman.
i don't like people so never sat next to people in school but yeah fucking hated puberty hate thinking of myself as a man.
I knew from a very early age on that both my body shape and behaviour were mostly feminine. When I was 8 years in 1985 I, for the first time, secretly went to my mother's wardrobe when she was away for work, put on her various stockings and high heels. I looked myself in the mirror and I felt so pretty and natural in them. I never liked to dress like a guy to this day. And in school I always felt more comfortable hanging with the girls. In later years during 1990s I told my mother about my strong female side and how much I loved to be a woman. She accepted me, because she always knew actually. I think the reason why my Polish mother (who died in 2012) was so open-minded and libertarian about LGBTQ was that she left Poland and moved to Germany in 1981, so I grew up in a completely different environment. She also had a gay friend in her circle of german acquaintances. And although our family is catholic, my mom was less religious and not conservative. These key factors also played a big role for me.
Well this brought up some burried feelings and memories and now I just feel sad,and honestly wow this was deep,thanks for the info.
Okay, I doubt you'll see this comment, but anyways I'm genderfluid and I'm also bi. I came out to everyone pretty recent like 3 weeks ago. I've never really hated my body but I also never hated being male. When I started wearing women's clothes I started to feel a LOT happier than usual I don't feel any depression like I did before. Anyways I wanted to ask because I've been thinking about if I should go trans and just become a woman fully or just wait a few years and really think it over? I'm also kinda scared about becoming too skinny, so idk if I should gain weight I a little bit before going trans. I don't know. I do know it cost a LOT of money too so I'm aware of that. 😅
No one can "go trans". Trans people are born trans. And the thing that medically makes them elligible for transition is dysphoria which is what makes them not able to go any longer with that physics of the "wrong" gender. Hence why medical intervention is needed for them. If you don't have dysphoria and transition you might end up detransitioning since transition is a long and tough path by itself alone. Basically trans people transition because they have to due to the dysphoria that is haunting them, otherwise, without dysphoria it'd be preference.
@@tobe3940 okay thanks
You're a man and that's a beautiful thing.
You can go on the path to become a woman or transition into a woman, but in the end you'll be on the path to the impossible. Men can't turn into women.
Men and women have biological differences.
You are designed as a man for a purpose. ❤️
@@GodSoLoved.Yeshua And you're designed as a man for the sake of putting people under your feet.
@friend binary Jesus loves you 💕✝️
I'm gay and I can't relate to a lot of things you said about other girls. Very interesting, thank you for sharing your story.
You are so gorgeous! And honestly I cannot tell your trans at all
It's so good know that there is much another poeple that have the same toughs like you.. man..
I remember when I turned therian, I never tough I could do that.. like?!
when I was kid I just like, liked so much to mimic animals yk?
so when I saw that another poeple had the same feelings like you you get so happy AND- BRO its the best thing ever
to you have a reason to live your life happily
I knew early on I was a girl and spent many nights wishing I'd wake up magically changed. I also have an influence from a commercial that I completely forgot about until I came out to my brother. I remember choosing Aimee for my girl name at 5. My brother remembered it was because of Aim toothpaste commercials. I remember wanting to be the girl in the commercial.I laughed with joy when he told me and the memories came back. It's kinda a cute story now that my dysphoria is less because I wear a dress lol!
How can I tell my mum that I am trans?
I just feel female. I’m not into men but I relate to females completely. I don’t feel male.
Growing up I found that I had an easier time talking or interacting with girls my grandma was the county girl scouts troop leader and I was always eager to help her with the troop I didn't make many friends bcuz I was always different didn't know why though
omg ur so pretty😭😭
Her voice is so relaxing ❤😍
his
@@licuid4536 her
@@makimusic1826 Mathilda is a biological male, it's his voice.
@@GodSoLoved.Yeshua Biology is just an excuse for marginalization. It’s her voice.
@@makimusic1826 A man is a biological male, this is a fact. It's his voice.
Awww omg.
1. I identify as a cis lesbian/queer woman and i want to say the 'well obviously EVERYONE feels this way obviously every girl wants to date girls but we cant ALL date girls' haha so i had that same kind of 'everyone wants to be the different gender/doesnt mesh with their assigned gender' feeling you had. Love that kid logic.
2. I'm crying listening to you talk about that ad and your determination. Thats so sad but so understandable. It must have been such a hard time for you. Sending BIG HUGS to your past self.
3. I know a smol human (10) who is questioning and i think this video is maybe very helpful! I will look for videos about the non-binary experience too.
This video is great thank you so very much for making it! Big love to you and keep up the good work! ❤
2nd?
3 THIRD
As a trans nonbinary person, I wanna share how it's for me personally
The childhood stuff-
I never really developed a concept of manhood (my body is amab), never related to "guy things", nor male stereotypes, etc. The only thing I knew was that if I refused to perform a certain way, I'd be punished for it. So until my later teens, I let the people around me choose my gender expression. I assumed it was the autism that made all this gender struggle.
I distinctly remember wanting to have the bright cute school materials that the girls had, if given the freedom, not caring if I played with "girl toys" or whatever.
And also every time I was made aware I was perceived as a boy, I'd cringe because it felt so yucky. Later, body hair started to give me dysphoria too, but that's about it.
The oddness that comes with being nonbinary is that my dysphoria is weird. I get dysphoria from seeing myself as a woman, and I get dysphoria from being perceived as a man. And the more I transition into someone androgynous, the more my dysphoria with masculinity grows. At first I was eh, but once the gender euphoria from ambiguous looks started to kick in, it's like a can't "downgrade" to boymode.
The thing is, performing masculinity really well *also* gives me gender euphoria. But the social dysphoria doesn't go away. So I can be in a state of both euphoria and dysphoria at the same time, it used to mess with me a looot.
Every time stuff is gendered or someone attempt to gender me, dysphoria kicks. It's weird going into non-unisex bathrooms, being expected to use my legal (male) name (yet to change it), having to specify my gender when I can only choose M or F, etc.
What makes me way less uncomfortable is being perceived as a GNC cis person (think softboys, 'overtly neurodivergent' guy, butch girl, ambiguously gay, etc). Just anything that's not 'stereotypical man' or transwoman.
What gives me the most euphoria is people being unsure of my gender, or passing as 'woman lite' before closer inspection.
yes this is exactly how i feel
One thing that has made me go into the closet deeply is the day my parents found that I was taking my sister’s clothes and when I found it, I felt embarrassed and they called me disgusting. Probably cause I thought I was a transvestite or something. I was 15
I knew back in the 60s/70s but back then if I had said anything I would have been certified. Plus my Father told me at an early age, that if I was gay he would kill me (and he meant it). So I lived a lie (tried to be 'normal') got married, had a family etc, until 2015 when I finally 'came out' & transitioned. NEVER BEEN HAPPIER, now I can just be myself & not put on an act anymore.
Sorry but how tall r u
I read what Zinna Jones wrote about indirect gender dysphoria. so now that is something to ruminat/obcess about. even if I was a paragirl, I would still be transgender.
I didn’t ever feel like I needed different privates, but I always loved doing things people would consider ‘girls stuff’ and all that. I was actually bullied for liking that stuff. I’ve always wanted FFS specifically and can someone answer: What is the age requirement for FFS in England, and do you pay for it in England…? (Sorry I’m a bit dumb.)
Are you gender dysphoria? Liking girl things is not the same thing. You may be suffering with AGP. Either way go & discuss with a professional & not a UA-camr.
Also, the fact that I'm watching this video, and I made this account I'm using right now. Probably just weird thoughts. Probably.
I really want to be a girl but im scared lol. I dont want to do something that i might regret, it honestly has nothing to do with the looks aspect cause i really like looking cute, but what if i want to have children in the future? Not to mention that my want for this is significantly accelerated when im turned on, so is it that j just like cross dressing? Am i just larping as someone who has a problem and just fetishesing being a women???? Idfk man everyday is a struggle. It doesn't fucking help at all that my family would probably disowm me on the spot of i ever even tried talking about it, they love god so much more than their own children and siblings. Its really gotten me to resent them to an extent and "my" religion. But at the same time, I still dont want to just cut them off. Would i be happier without my family as a women or with them as a man? I need therapy LOL but my broke ass cant afford shit atm xd.
I appreciate hearing your story, and reading the others in the comments. For me I never felt right as a boy as a kid and always thought that it wasn’t fair that my sister could wear pretty things and could do things with the girls that I couldn’t, not that she did. I’m happy that I’ve become my true self now and can say definitely that my real life begins at 40 😊.
I’m 13 identify as a girl (born as a male 😭)(in my pfp I’m wearing a bra lol) and like when I was little (like 6) I really really really wanted to be a girl and like I hated my p**nis and I thought it wasn’t normal (I mean like for me personally, being autistic and ADHD I can’t really explain this properly) and I wanted to be a girl and then when I was 7 I thought I was gay and even then I still didn’t feel right than when i turned 8 I realised that I thought I was a femboy (I heard about femboys from my older sister) and then I realised that wasn’t me either then like I found out it is possible to become a girl and then I thought about it deeply till now and 3 months ago I turned out as trans to my mum a week she said she called a gender clinic in Hobart (aus,Tas) and it would be 20 years to get a referral from my gp and today I did some research and for the state I live in (Tas) it would take from 3 months to a year to get the referral (I have psychologist and councillor) and yeah that’s it so I think my mum doesn’t accept me-
I do feeling bad right now wrong body change into the FEMALE
I wish I had the confidence to talk to my doctor about questioning my gender
I am almost 50, I know I am trans have known for my whole life just suppressed it because back when I was younger it was not something that was even slightly accepted.
I was always jealous of my sister’s clothing to the point it literally made me mad when sh got a pretty new dress. I always migrated to the girls and what they were doing on the playground as the boys were just annoying.
Unfortunately since I repressed it so long it is too late for me to be my true self. It would not be fair for my wife or kids and would just be selfish of me.
I do dress when I can which helps relieve the stress of keeping my secret but it is not that often.
Keeping it a secret causes me such stress but I just do not think it is fair to relive my stress by causing stress for my family.
The only person I have ever confided in was my sister after my fathers passing 10 years ago. She is very supportive.
do you have gay fantasies as well or you're straight and like women's clothes?
AGP
I hope everything goes well. Live your life well!
I don't have the mental energy to watch this, but I really really wish that I looked like you 😓
Amazing 💘❤️
When I was a kid, I always felt like wanting to hang out with girls was wrong because every time I did hang out with a girl my parents with joke around and say oh, is that your girlfriend so I stopped hanging out with girls as a kid
I’ve known I was a girl for a long time tbh and I think I could be really cute just struggling to get the voice I want 😭
I am a transgender MTF I've been on hrt for six months now I love being female
I understand it's abrasive to hear, gender dysphoria is real, but the truth is estrogen does not make a male a female.
@@GodSoLoved.Yeshuaand your sky daddy isn't real either 😂😂😂
You always were. Transitioning helps align your body to your gender.
@@biancawilloughby9980A woman is a biological female. Mathilda is a biological male, he can never be a woman.
Are you From Ohio?
My family members as well as 80's movies convinced me as a kid that I would be way happier as a man with a woman. 12 years of depression and 2 ego deaths later I'm way happier as a woman with a man. Funny how that works out lol
I wish so much I was a woman and always wanted to be one ❤❤❤❤
So I have always wanted to understand more about what the feelings are when it comes to trans. I thank you for being mature about it and making it sound well thought out.
This sounds so like me!
Pls wear Dutch braids in a video after your hair grows
i want to be trans now!!!!!! thank you!!!
Can someone answer this question, can someone be transgender without experiencing dysphoria?
Yes! It is commonly repeated throughout the trans community that a trans person does not need to be dysphoric to be trans. The only requirement for being trans is... being trans! Trans people who don't have gender dysphoria are just as valid as those who do! 🌈
My voice is weird. I have EXTREME voice dysphoria. I can't stand my voice. When I yell, I just hear my abusive dad. The low end of my speaking voice is like 100hz, and I can go even lower if I force it. ...yet my high end gets up to like 700hz, and I can scream like a girl. I really don't understand how I have such a wide range.
How I don't get clocked, I really don't know.
Then again, I male failed years before I came out. From 16-23, I passed as a woman despite being flat chested, having a low voice, and wearing drab men's clothes. I had shoulder length hair. Very little body hair, no beard shadow. I don't know how that voice didn't out me back then, and I don't know how it doesn't now.
I have a similar range so you are perfect for voice training
Was that you trying to brag to others that supposedly "despite having a low (and extremely wide ranged) voice, you passed as a girl"? ...
@@tobe3940 This is clearly not a brag.
I'm also early on knowing what it means to be a boy or girl