@@big-wade naw, don't sell yourself short mate, that's pretty solid code! also, I've been writing python for over a decade now, teaching it for the past 3 years and i never knew you can do the kind of nested tuple unpacking like you're doing around line 30, that is SO cool!
I love how, despite the fact that the frames are felt at the same speed, it just *feels* like its getting faster, theres something about the louder chaos just feeling faster than the quieter chaos.
I think it's the higher contrast in the types of sounds. All quiet sounds are pretty similar in that they're pretty close to silence. Loud sounds can be more different from one another. Basically, quieter sounds change less because they're more similar, so it sounds like they change less often. Whereas louder sounds are more audibly distinct, so you can really feel the change in audio every frame.
halfway through I started feeling physically ill as my mind struggled to process what I was watching, but that soon gave way to a slight tinge of fear as the disembodied screams of Agnes Skinner were stitched together with years of shitposting
Now I'm just imagining Skinner messing up his oven usage so badly that he opens up a dimensional rift that sucks Chalmers straight out the living room and into a spaghettified fate.
Sometimes you forget that human speech is basically a wind instrument modulated by slapping wet meat together and then something like this comes along and reminds you
I love that you can slowly hear Agnes's screams for help mounting and becoming more and more shrill until they're completely taken over by Chalmers' cries of anger
For anyone wondering, (because, as I noticed listening to the soundtrack, Valve tended to put multiple set pieces sounds on the soundtracks for those levels in Portal 2), Its on track 7 of Portal's OST ua-cam.com/video/1g2cGQirOr4/v-deo.html
Fun fact: all your memories are stored in such a non-sequential manner and only appear sequential to us during recollection. This video is the closest you get to a pure memory, detached from the event of having to recollect it.
Nah this is still in a certain sequential order. Perceiving time all at once would be like “Steamed hams but every frame is played at the same time continuously”
Dude imagine if this is what it’s like when your life flashes before your eyes. Every single memory you’ve ever experienced smashed and jumbled together into one chaotic nightmare
If you pause at random places, you can definitely see far more artifacts that you would normally expect in Steamed Hams. So the algorithm is definitely not getting the most out of the benefits of P frames as we would normally expect. However it's far less of a blurry mess for one simple reason, the discrete cosine transform that's used to compress the excessive number of I frames that are necessary for this video is going to benefit IMMENSELY from the fact that each frame is mostly just flat colors, and where it's got hard edges, it's still extremely well approximated by large low frequency coefficients and small high frequency coefficients. So the resulting file size is probably about the same as most any other steamed hams video with only very limited effects on the perceived quality.
Chalmers face becoming progressively disgruntled until he's shouting as the flames send skinner into a hysterical flailing frenzy. A truly magnificent luncheon 10/10 will steam again
If you play this out loud and move away from your phone a little, you can almost vaguely hallucinate that they’re saying semi-coherent sentences in the middle third of the video
Simple “hallucinations” are actually a very normal part of our perception-check out Oliver Sacks’ book on them, or his TED Talk ;) So it’s very natural for us to be able to do things like that. But “am I ok?” That’s a different topic entirely! 😀 (I am, incidentally, doing alright today)
Chalmers musters what little strength he has left to curse out the fool who localized a temporal rift entirely within his kitchen, causing reality as they all know it to collapse.
This would be a idea for a hidden message in a futuristic themed show. Record a 2 minute long message and scramble all the frames and have a robot speak that in the show hinting at some untold mystery regarding the cyborg invasion the main character has to solve
Seymour's mother's scream spread out over the back third of this is actually pretty unsettling, it sounds like someone is trapped in the video itself and is begging for help
How long did this take I have to know
thirty minutes, python, and a dream
@@big-wadedo you have the code for this somewhere?
@@vozh-kc its not that good but sure! pastebin.com/MrxREvCR
edit: revised version in description
@@big-wade naw, don't sell yourself short mate, that's pretty solid code!
also, I've been writing python for over a decade now, teaching it for the past 3 years and i never knew you can do the kind of nested tuple unpacking like you're doing around line 30, that is SO cool!
@@vozh-kc thank you so much!
0:36 “The sausages started smoking”
HOW COULD YOU HEAR THAT LOL NOW I CANT UNHEAR IT
OH MY GOD
@@stellataylor7436 MY ROAST IS RUINED
HOW DID YOU FIND THIS
wow
I woke up at nearly 2 AM to this on youtube autoplay, and I genuinely thought i was losing my goddamn mind.
Glad to know the algorithm is working as intended
This is the best way to experience this
the hams steamed you
Holy shit I would brown my shorts if this happened to me
Do you regularly fall asleep to UA-cam autoplay? That seems like an unhinged way to sleep
This feels like I am downloading all steamed hams videos into my brain at once
Neo: "I know Steamed Hams"
POV: Vision command grabbed you
@@Damian_1989 “show me”
hit show Chuck
@@Damian_1989
Morpheus: "May I see it?"
Neo: ...no.
I've never been so relieved as when the CONSTANT lip-smacking noises finally gave way to speech.
YEAH 532ND LIKE!!!!!!!!!!!!!!
@@532isthebestnumber Glad I could help make the dream come true.
777 like :3
Before watching this video, I saw your comment. I thought "Oh, come on, surely it isn't that bad."
Then I watched the video.
In the end, all Chalmers can do is defiantly scream the name of his nemesis as reality collapses around him.
Underrated comment
SEMMOOOOOOR
LMAO
Chalmers' scream is what it will sound (and look) like when you have a neuralink installed and someone sends you a corrupted gif
Ah, yes, my enemy, “EMEUEUEUEEUEEUEEAOOOAOEEOOEEUEE”
Using this as computer noises for the background of a sci fi thing
Perfection
I'd like to hear about the sci-fi thing.
Still recognizable
@@simontist Eh, you can put some filters on it and no one will know
@@simontistIt’s recognizable but not TOO recognizable. It’d be a good easter egg.
I have epilepsy and can confirm this is not unlike having a seizure
You know this video is quite similar to the experience of having a seizure
It could damn well give you one.
1:22 "nuclear homicide"
wtf it's actually so clear
Bruh that’s not even anywhere close to being the original script and yet it’s so clearly spoken
"Nucular! It's pronounced nucular!"
@@Shifsabre what reference is that from?
@@wvking George Bush
i love how you can hear "HEEEEELP" and "AURORA BOREALIS" getting more frequent
That and "SEEEEYMOOUURRR"
Seymour creates a temporal rift localized entirely within his kitchen
I was surprised to see that the yawn seems to be the loudest part overall.
@@crestothegecko6279 Can we see it?
She is trying to get out
the beginning sounds like a horse pulling a wagon with squeaky wheels
It does!
complete with soft chewing noises that drive me up the wall
Hey you, you're finally awake!
Sounds like a portable CD player when you're out jogging
Godzilland Anguirus 😲
I can't believe part of Skinner's "OH!" Is louder than Chalmers' "Good Lord!"
or "Aurora Borealis!?!"
Or his mother screaming
i'm surprised that the yawn makes up some of the loudest frames
chalmer's "good lord" is louder, but skinner's "oh!" has more volume :)
@@gloomyeyes1527that aint how that works
I wish I could send this back to the writers room in 1992 and blow their minds
everywhere at the end of steamed hams stage 4 - post-borealis confusion
it's just a burning roast
what does it matter how my ham steams
But my ham steams for youuu~
And ham steams
Temporary Steamed State
Getting past the “chewing era” of this video was incredibly difficult.
the beginning was pure sensory horror
Only the strongest misophonia sufferers will survive.
It was funny
@@derpfluidvariant0916 Started screaming
i've never had an issue with chewing sounds until this video. I get it now
I love how, despite the fact that the frames are felt at the same speed, it just *feels* like its getting faster, theres something about the louder chaos just feeling faster than the quieter chaos.
I think it's the higher contrast in the types of sounds.
All quiet sounds are pretty similar in that they're pretty close to silence. Loud sounds can be more different from one another.
Basically, quieter sounds change less because they're more similar, so it sounds like they change less often. Whereas louder sounds are more audibly distinct, so you can really feel the change in audio every frame.
Also a lot of the quieter frames are from the same scene
It's like that meme of a music staff filled with rests but every bar the rests get shorter lengths and doubled.
Faster... and violent.
Lisa, in this house we we obey the the laws of thermodynamics!
The flashes of increasingly angry facial expressions as the volume climbs is wonderful
halfway through I started feeling physically ill as my mind struggled to process what I was watching, but that soon gave way to a slight tinge of fear as the disembodied screams of Agnes Skinner were stitched together with years of shitposting
probably normal reaction to this
my impression of that part in text form:
wglsd-A-lslsk-A-lho-A-ksad-A-lk-A-o-A-pa-A-healepa-A-jaom-A-m-A-wa-A-pma-A-
He created an amazing horror experience just for a Steamed Hams meme
Lol, I knew I was home when I started hearing the "hellp HELLLPP!" in microsecond snippets
This video is quite accurately what my anxiety sounds like.
The speech of a dead god, using their voices as its vessel. It is not them. They cannot be saved.
Rip dead god
WOOOOOO DEAD GOD FINALLY COMPLETED TBOI WOOOOOO
2 more save files to go !
💀
Where are you quoting that from? Just asking.
It's good to see that Steamed Hams is still getting some mileage after all these years
It's a good one
@@gabriellandon2593good one😊
Perhaps a more perfect 3 minutes of television will be produced someday, but until that day steamed hams shall reign.
superintendent chalmers! i hope you're ready for an undying meme!
It's been like 4 years, calm down
the evil AI when i spill my drink on it's harddrive
daisy, daisy,
Give me your answer do
I’m have crazy
🚁👍
all for the love of you
Skinner's mother's screaming slowly building up made the ending straight out of a horror movie.
Chalmers screaming "seymore" distorted across the Shredded fabric of time near the end is exactly what I was hoping for
Did chris nolan write your comment
Hearing Seymour's mother screaming for help for what felt like an hour was also an experience
I was surprised to find out that Skinner fake yawning is actually louder than Chalmers screaming Seymour
2:29
Now I'm just imagining Skinner messing up his oven usage so badly that he opens up a dimensional rift that sucks Chalmers straight out the living room and into a spaghettified fate.
Sometimes you forget that human speech is basically a wind instrument modulated by slapping wet meat together and then something like this comes along and reminds you
And you know what's the thing about steamed hams?
It's wet meat ;)
when she steam on my ham til i woodwind
>I graduated from Reddit university
I guess
@@VinluvAntonHandesbukiagoing to assume you meant this as a compliment because you seem to be the most reddit person who's ever been
At one point, I very clearly heard Skinner's mom say "help", and it disturbs me that it was the only coherent thing I heard in this mess.
I heard it right as I read this
She was the only one who survived up until that point
I need a time stamp
i like seymour's mother being heard through the chaos starting at around 1:40
H- A- H- HE- H- E- H- A-
It sounds like someone trying to not drown in a river
Agnes vibrating through the void.
Being taken by the interdimenional Satan XD
I was listening for her towards the end but didn't hear her scream.
I can't listen again anytime soon.
I can't get over Agnes distorted cries for help as reality crumbles...
So much for a unforgettable luncheon.
It became the forgotten luncheon
2:45 OH GO- O O O O O O O O O O O
2:48 ye-
My man got compressed
E@@leandro88888
Me when I spill 5 liters of uranium
@TheTuxFromLinux supertux sucks
Not knowing how loud this is going to get or when it is going to end is what a panic attack feels like.
this sounds like it would be a good "eldritch whispers slowly getting louder" sound effect in a cosmic horror video game
if you added echo and slight distortion yeah
i thought the same thing
With some editing, the last few seconds could also be a good sound effect for your stereotypical supercomputer performing computations.
I love that you can slowly hear Agnes's screams for help mounting and becoming more and more shrill until they're completely taken over by Chalmers' cries of anger
Followed by Skinner's overwhelming lack of interest
i didn’t even know that was her name
@@GoTeamScotch The man is so bored by their screams
I honestly expected the “SEYMOUR!!!” to have been the loudest, but it was the yawn, THE YAWN.
Playing this in one headphone ear while the other is the Bible in Chinese at x2 speed
My memory of steamed hams after the lobotomy
"Insert unoriginal geometry dash joke here"
Eternal Steaming of the Spotless Ham
@@Scigam243‼️‼️🔥🔥🗣🗣EEEFHHIILNORT
i was legit going to comment me after the lobotomy on this
2:34 I like that you hear the start of, and then subsequent blips of, Chalmers’ “SEYMOOOOUUUUUURRRRR” for the rest of the video.
It's like an apparition appearing
aurora borealis
He's trying to break through to tell Seymour off
AA- A A A
It's funny how the loudest part is just him yawning, all together in one segment at the end
The way it looks like his arms just flail around actually made me laugh out loud
1:09 "Hamburgers are bell fruits"
I HEAR IT
I H E A R I T !
G E T I T O U T
Ironically there was a Simpsons episode where Homer became addicted to a diet of bell peppers
i only hear hamburgers
Now I can’t unhear it
This sounds like the fucking hidden Rattmam chamber in Portal 2 if anyone remembers that
oh i remember him alright
I hate how right you are
It really fucking does 😭
For anyone wondering, (because, as I noticed listening to the soundtrack, Valve tended to put multiple set pieces sounds on the soundtracks for those levels in Portal 2), Its on track 7 of Portal's OST ua-cam.com/video/1g2cGQirOr4/v-deo.html
I was playing Portal 2 just a few days ago and stopped by to check in
2:29 the way he slowly yells out Seymour’s name
He knows all of this is Seymour's doing
SE E -E. MO O O
he hopelessly calls into the void, for he knows this will be his last words
-EE E OO OR O
i love how the doorbell spanned through about 80% of the video
and how you can barely hear chalmers yell "SEYMOUR" toward the end
Then Y̵͊͜ä̸̪́͋̍͜a̶̦͎̼͐͛a̸̗̎̒͝à̶̳̯̋͝a̷̢̻͐̔͝w̷̟͆͠w̸̮͑ŵ̴̱̼̓n̷̤̲̹̈̐ from Skinner
“O-OO-OO-O-O-R-R-R”
That’s the fucking doorbell???? I thought I was going insane
1:52
I love how you can hear the mom desperately screaming for help amidst the chaos
My entire life flashed before my eyes, and it was an unforgettable luncheon.
I got this tattooed on my arm
Beautiful comment, unironically.
2:10 its now you can hear seymours mother start crying for help.
I noticed that too 🤣
No one can save her, as reality is falling apart as we know it and no one can stop it.
@@oefest5252 meanwhile there's just a man staring in the abyss
Do you approach?
This is probably the closest humanity will ever get to understanding “perceiving time all at once”
Fun fact: all your memories are stored in such a non-sequential manner and only appear sequential to us during recollection. This video is the closest you get to a pure memory, detached from the event of having to recollect it.
@@olindbloIs that why LSD causes a sensation of time warping and dilating?
Nah this is still in a certain sequential order. Perceiving time all at once would be like “Steamed hams but every frame is played at the same time continuously”
@@santiagolarson5926 CUDA core Hams
@@UrsineBloke probably not
at around 2:44 you can hear skinner say ""Oh god, OH GO-" as reality is about to shut down
This is honestly nightmare fuel, especially with how you can hear Skinner's mother's cries for help slowly fade in.
Agnes attempts to scream through the noise and is swallowed up
The correct way to watch this is slowly moving it towards your eyes, allowing the image to double and blur
My brain has never run this fast before
Oh my god your so right also holy crap epilepsy warning
0:00-0:04 Silent
0:05-0:10 Chewing
0:11-0:18 Static comes in as chewing rises
0:19-0:33 Bird chirping as chewing climaxes
0:34-0:43 Whispers as chewing decreases
0:44-0:48 Small talk
0:49-0:58 Grunts from Superintendent, music(?)
0:59-1:12 Low voices as sound effects climax
1:13-1:25 Semi-full volume talking
1:26-1:56 Talking
1:57-2:13 Talking raises in volume
2:14-2:20 ???
2:21-2:32 Talking raises in volume further
2:33-2:37 Semi-loud yelling
2:38-2:47 Reality collapses with Seymour's mother's voice, Superintendent Chalmers' yelling and Seymour yawning
2:48 End
Thank you for this academic analysis.
The animators didnt know the historic artifact they were creating
Our future generations and their alien coworkers will analyze videos like this in the far future
What if the only thing that civilization in the far future will have from our society is steamed hams edits
Imagine being an alien finding this thousands of years after our extinction
I can just imagine a futuristic, advanced civilisation reconstructing this masterpiece, wondering what it said about our society 💀
they definitely would spend some time reconstructing it
what if only the audio survives and they think this is how we spoke
I think that thought so often.
@@YoNicePaprikaI wish this is how we spoke, this is way less boring than any of our languages
Dude imagine if this is what it’s like when your life flashes before your eyes.
Every single memory you’ve ever experienced smashed and jumbled together into one chaotic nightmare
And the frames reordered from quietest to loudest
@@vinsplayer2634 that would start to get absolutely terrifying at the end, like you're free falling through hell lol
This actually kinda reminds me of Everything Everywhere at the End of Time haha
My entire life is steamed hams
Well, if this has taught me anything is that it'll still make sense, somehow.
"This is making me uncomfortable in ways that I didn't know were possible"
-My girlfriend
Chalmers yelling “SEEEEEMOOOOORRREE” barely intelligibly at the end is hilarious to me. Like reality broke and he knows it’s all Skinner’s fault
Its a cry for help
Thanks for perforating my cerebrum. Feeling truly alive this morning.
no worries pally
I'm impressed it survived encoding and didn't turn into a blur.
"Ooops, all I-frames!"
The youtube compression algorithm has been specifically designed to optimize the fidelity of steamed hams
The file size must be huge right? Part of the compression algorithm is done by calculating the differences between each frame.
If you pause at random places, you can definitely see far more artifacts that you would normally expect in Steamed Hams. So the algorithm is definitely not getting the most out of
the benefits of P frames as we would normally expect.
However it's far less of a blurry mess for one simple reason, the discrete cosine transform that's used to compress the excessive number of I frames that are necessary for this video is going to benefit IMMENSELY from the fact that each frame is mostly just flat colors, and where it's got hard edges, it's still extremely well approximated by large low frequency coefficients and small high frequency coefficients.
So the resulting file size is probably about the same as most any other steamed hams video with only very limited effects on the perceived quality.
@@OhhCrapGuythank you king
horrible experience. thank you for your service.
Chalmers face becoming progressively disgruntled until he's shouting as the flames send skinner into a hysterical flailing frenzy. A truly magnificent luncheon 10/10 will steam again
Skinner's fake yawn is one of the loudest moments in the video
this is how all animations should be.
I get startled by all those sudden volume changes, this was much more pleasant to watch.
Yeah it allows you to be gradually introduced to the loudness and all you have to do is sacrifice the plot
@@Ninjiin23 sonic the hedgehog critics told me plot and characters don't matter
Can't imagine Seymor yawning is one of the loudest frames.
I like how Seymour yawning is louder than Superintendent Chalmers yelling.
Imagine experiencing your life back like this.
Months of slurping sounds
"Ayo we fucked up the file for your life playback, we recovered it but its sorted by loudness"
@@dontkickmychick6076tfw God doesn’t have good IT
AMBATAKUMMMMM
@@GoTeamScotch years probably.
Oh and how many months of snoring?
Hidden Messeges You Missed:
"Paul McCartney was never real"
"the moonlanding was a recreation"
"Obama's last name is Montana"
LOL WHERE?
is joke
barack obama montana... BOM.... coincidence? i think now
what da heck is a joke? @@big-wade
Obama Montana and Hannah Barack, as god intended
1:12 “this is great.”
They are Hearing Voices.
@@ziloleepic33900:36
This feels like a panic attack
Also Seymour’s mom just panicking in the background is fucking amazing
I don’t think people will ever run out of steamed hams meme ideas
What is streamed hams may never die.
@@yshwgth
What is Steamed may never fry
If you play this out loud and move away from your phone a little, you can almost vaguely hallucinate that they’re saying semi-coherent sentences in the middle third of the video
Are you ok?
Simple “hallucinations” are actually a very normal part of our perception-check out Oliver Sacks’ book on them, or his TED Talk ;) So it’s very natural for us to be able to do things like that.
But “am I ok?” That’s a different topic entirely! 😀 (I am, incidentally, doing alright today)
sounds like the end of a medicine advert listing all the possible side effects
"Computer: Search all Earth historical records for 'Steamed Hams'. Increase speed factor sixty."
I love morning alarms like this that slowly increase in volume.
It's a very gentle way to wake up.
Learning how to make this my alarm rn.
This is literally exactly how I perceive reality but with occasional pauses of static and the sounds of screaming
dawg is not a horror beyond comprehension 🌫️🌫️
Are you ok
@@ShockedTaiLung I hope not
Hi are you a girl and do you have a boyfriend
bro is fiending for likes
Two telepatic beings discuss a mostly mundane event, but keep correcting eachother over the tiniest inaccuracies while getting increasingly angry.
Its been YEARS and these videos are still being made and recommended to me
I like how in the last few seconds you can literally make out the “SEYMOURRRRRRRRRR”
Chalmers musters what little strength he has left to curse out the fool who localized a temporal rift entirely within his kitchen, causing reality as they all know it to collapse.
I like how every couple of months, steamed hams memes just start to reappear again out of the ether. Truly a great cycle at work.
This was such a genuinely interesting auditory experience! It’s like being in a whirlwind of sorts
Who keeps spinning the world around?
Felt very similar to a lot of experimental tape music from the 60’s
Hey this is how it feels to watch TV during a major depressive episode! I've seen this!
The 1st 30 seconds being mostly composed of gesticulations & hushing suggests the atmosphere of a furtive make-out.
FUCKING WHAT
visible concern
The mouth sounds that start appearing around 0:08 made me shudder...
Steamed ASMR
Cursed asmr
Thank you Wade, this is a wonderful sound test!
THANKS BROTHER
This would be a idea for a hidden message in a futuristic themed show. Record a 2 minute long message and scramble all the frames and have a robot speak that in the show hinting at some untold mystery regarding the cyborg invasion the main character has to solve
Starts out as the most uncomfortable ASMR ever before devolving into utter chaos, lmao
I love around the 35 second mark you can just begin to hear the kitchen door swinging constantly
and ðe -p-i-a-n-o- doorbell
this video feels like it's getting closer to me as it goes on
This feels like analogue horror and I don’t know why
“This asmr is so relaxing!”
The asmr:
Agnes’ scream for help breaking through at the end and getting more understandable was insane hahaha
Neo waking up from the training programs in the first Matrix film: "I know steamed hams."
Morpheus: "Show me."
I like how at some point, before it hit one minute, it went from whispering to the highspeed warnings at the end of every medication ad
Teacher: It's quiet reading time which means you have to read but also keep it quiet!
That one kid: 0:25
explain?
@@janTesika There are people who just can't help quietly reading out loud :3
@@janTesikasome people can't read in their mind
Hi can we be friends@@Orlogmeister
@@OrlogmeisterAre they the same people that have no internal monologue?
When I die and instead of my life flashing before my eyes, it’s just my memory of every individual time I’ve watched a steamed hams video
When I die my life will flash before my eyes, but instead of playing chronologically it will play every single frame from quietest to loudest
@@jobobrien1420 and everyone mattered
dude the wispers start to build up and make me insane 💀💀
I love the brief cuts of screaming in the middle of eldritch convesation. It really ties the whole thing together
Seymour's mother's scream spread out over the back third of this is actually pretty unsettling, it sounds like someone is trapped in the video itself and is begging for help
The regular recurrence of the song frames just gives it such an eerie quality. This is amazing.
Gonna use this in my next dnd campaign when the PCs do delving into someones mind, uninvited.
If they ever need background music for an exorcism...
POV: You're an AI sorting through audio samples to emulate the voice of a character for every possible pitch and intonation.
RVC moment
Everysteam, Everywhere, All At Ham
This is the closest video i have been able to find to overstimulation