@@toshi9742 you clearly didn't listen to the entire thing. They had been sexting prior to the "actual" cheating. This wasn't rape, they both knew what they were doing. And he admitted he wasn't that drunk when he slept with her. Stop trying to jump a useless mans side. He was in the wrong. He is not a victim. Don't play that bullshit.
@@hdmm9136 yeah obviously I didn’t so why go off on me? I’ve been corrected in another comment and explained that I felt too uncomfortable to continue watching after the first segment, which I am allowed to do- as much as I am allowed to form an opinion around the information I had at that time. Hope this helps.
The expression goes, “The blood of the covenant is thicker than the water of the womb.” Meaning found family can be more important than your connection to your biological family.
It's a nice thought and all, but I think this has been disproven as there are no credible sources for this, justvthis one dude saying that was how it was. So, unfortunately, the saying really is "blood is thicker than water". I do really like the meaning of the rephrased version though.
@@beckys3383 I wasn't arguing about that, I am all for found family. I was just saying that the belief that the expression "the blood of the covenant is thicker than the water of the womb" is the original is unfortunately wrong.
The husband is absolutely horrible for this but I would just divorce him and tell my family what he did, however, I would literally have to fist fight my mom for this 😤
I would just wait until the next family gathering to just stand up, make a toast, and announce “We’re getting a divorce!…because my mom F-Ed my husband the night before our wedding! Have fun with that one close relatives!” Just to walk back in the room a quick second to be like “Oh and it was planned”
@LIV Liv high key yes! Just be like “hey watch out, your partners might be next!” Because WHO DOES THAT TO THEIR OWN DAIGHTER?! THE NIGHT BEFORE HER WEDDING?! What type of narcissist parent bs is this???
Even though both of them were of age, it sounds like this “mother” could possibly be a predator. The daughter said her mother had done this before? When? When she and her past boyfriends were minors? And there was a near-30 year age gap? I’m not trying to imply that she is indeed a predator, but the fact that there’s history of that behavior is disturbing.
Exactly what I was thinking. I want to know if the boyfriend is doing okay. She said he was very drunk, she probably knew this and took advantage of him. Sure, he knew his mother has flirted with her others boyfriends, but could he ever know she would have sex with him before his and his girlfriend's wedding? And the age gap to.. I don't want to say he was r*ped, but I feel like it could be considered that in a way. He probably hid it at first due to just being ashamed, or scared to admit what her mother did. I understand if she is going to divorce him, but she needs to make sure he is okay first. TL;DR: I hope the bf is okay. He was drunk as hell, and I highly doubt he ever thought this would happen. Also the age gap, it feels like this could be even considered r*pe.
@@RealGirlyGirl did you watch the whole video.. honestly I thought the same thing at first but, with the edit on the post saying he was sexting the mother prior…
@@V4mpirelvrs Oh i think i missed that- yeah i 100% get that, but i still do stand where i am. I really have a feeling he was pressured into it, like maybe she was blackmailed him I just have that feeling that there's something we dont know
I wonder why the daughter kept up a relationship with her mom when the mom had a history of trying to come onto this girl’s boyfriends. 1000% agree though that she needs to just flat out tell the family the real reason, no sugar coating. “The biggest issue was the actual cheating” as if sexting doesn’t count as cheating?? What?? Exchanging nudes and sexting IS cheating. Sleeping with someone who isn’t your partner IS cheating. Any romantic or sexual action that happens with someone else or multiple other people while having a partner IS cheating.
I think maybe she still wanted a relationship with her mother and brushed it off, and now she's completely letting it out. Because I would be pissed off too if someone slept with my husband, so I guess that was the breaking point for her.
@@smolsheep2372 Genuine question but how would it be easier to keep someone around who causes you trouble/pain in your life? Like I know it's easier said than done to cut a family member out of your life, especially a mom, but wouldn't the effort to do that be more worth it than causing yourself more pain and potentially trauma?
@@savagerose3077 Unless there's serious abuse immediate family members are difficult to cut off. Everyone's tolerance for the bad behaviours of family are very different. I personally would have gone low/no contact with my parent well before this point but for others it takes a hell of a lot more to break contact. And most of the time you have to cut more than just that one family member unless everyone else cuts that person off as well. And maybe she could deal with the previous flirting but didn't think her egg donor nor her partner would go this far. Too many factors to say for certain
@@toshi9742 He then “snuck” back into the house, laid in bed with his fiancé and INITIATED SEX with her. He said himself he didn’t feel taken advantage of and they had been sexting for several months. Your comment doesn’t apply in this situation.
@@Felorina I didn’t. If they somehow planned to fuck the night before the wedding then sure it wasn’t however I wasn’t watching anymore after the initial information they had and they were keen to go down on him. As a survivor myself it was disgusting and triggering and I did not (and will not) subject myself to it anymore than I wish to.
They had sex, that was bad. But for me the even bigger break in trust is the lying about it. Also, the fact he doesn't see sexting as cheating... About the family, cut the mom off and tell the rest the truth. If anyone fights op on it, cut them off too, they will truly show you who they are.
I don’t understand how people like this find each other. Like imagine coming on to your mother in law and then she actually takes you up on it! What? So glad she divorced him.
I can't believe some people have mothers like this. This sounds like something out of a nightmare. I'm so thankful to have an unconditionally loving and caring mother who would never in a million years scar me as this mother had done.
Right? My mother’s a narcissist and I absolutely believe she would do this if ever given the chance. Now that I have a niece, it confuses me even more. I WANT her to have a better life than me. I want her to have everything I never did. I would give my whole life just for her happiness. And she’s 19 so it’s not like I haven’t had time to think about it lol It’s just mind boggling honesty.
The "blood is thicker than water" has been twisted somewhere along the way. The full saying is " The blood of the covenant is thicker than the waters of the womb" which is the exact opposite of that first quote.
I heard another story almost exactly like this before, a psychiatrist weighed in and said the mothers issue isn’t needing validation by sleeping with younger men, she would’ve sleep with a DIFFERENT younger man if that were the case and not gone after her daughters man. When a parent sexually singles out their child’s partner it’s because the parent has severe and irrational jealousy issues of their child and views the child not as their child but rather as their competition in life. This behavior will usually not change because the parent has spent the child’s whole life viewing them as competition and at this point that’s their dynamic. The psychiatrist also mentioned that this occurs far more often in mother/daughter relationships than it does son/father relationships and often stems from narcissistic mothers who blame the child for “wrecking their bodies, stealing their youth and stopping them from fulfilling dreams they’ve had for their lives”. It’s completely stupid. There’s no salvaging that relationship, you have to bail.
I was going to say…her mother’s definitely a narcissist. So is mine. She absolutely flirts with my boyfriends and acts like it’s not obvious. Luckily, the men I date either ignore her or laugh about it…like most guys would.
There was an inverse version of this story also on reddit. A woman in her 40s to 50s married a younger man in his 30s. She suspected he was cheating and caught him in the act on the house security camera, WITH HER SON who was like 18-22 or something. She confronted them about it and they both said they wanted to be together and the husband left her for her son. I feel so bad for both these women. I have family problems, just like anyone else, but thankfully nothing like this. I genuinely cannot fathom the lack of empathy and consideration these people have toward their CHOSEN partners. Don’t want commitment? Don’t commit! I really just don’t understand people, never have and probably never will. To me this is such a simple thing to say no to.
I would divorce my husband, cut off my family, and get a therapist to help undo all the crap my family has done to me and really accept that I don't need them in my life.
Can we start to normalize not having to explain ourselves and why we are getting divorced? I had a terrible time when my family and friends demanded why instead of offering support. Obviously when a divorce happens there are reasons and you'll be curious, but if you're not in the relationship then you're not owed an explanation. Divorce is hard. If you love your friend or family member, just be there for them. She shouldn't have to explain to them.
right, in all honesty, people are just nosy! people will literally add to a persons struggle during a divorce by not only asking questions, but even getting upset that they don’t want to answer those questions! it’s so messed up.
A reminder that "Blood is thicker than water" is a shortening of the original quote, which completely turns the original meaning on its head. The original is "The blood _of the Covenant_ is thicker than the water _of the Womb."_ It's saying _literally_ about choosing the people you consider family.
So... my great aunt on my dad's side married her daughters widower whom she had 3 children with. I'm pretty sure the kids still call her gma too... I know it's not as severe but I'm pretty sure they hooked up for the first time at the daughter's funeral. My grandpa also refuses to be around her (she's my grandma's sister) because he's afraid she's going to force herself on him...
Gosh what a story! Yikes. What a disgusting mother! The only thing I want to add is, I can't believe the husband. It sounds like he implied that sexting wasn't cheating. Leaving it out because it wasn't the physical act, etc. That's insane!!! If it wasn't cheating in his eyes, why didn't he tell her sooner? Obviously he knows it shows extra premeditation. I feel for op so much! I really hope she has a wonderful life after this. She deserves it.
My wife's mom is the same way. She was disappointed her kid was gay for the reason she could not steal her spouse. She is a legit narcissist, so is this mother.
@@rebeccatomlin3916 literally every conversation. When they are narcissistic, its like they have no filter. Constantly on her about getting w a man so they could have his $ and she would impy sleeping w him. Our wedding she threw a fit and told her `you were mine first` . Thank you for the kind words
@@belindarocky961 i haven’t listened to it yet but i’m sooo excited. i love hearing how sarah’s brain works it’s so interesting bc she articulates things so well
“Chosen family” isn’t a gay community thing. That is something that has been going on in different communities forever! As a result of toxic families and broken families people have been forming their chosen families for years.
Omg, my daughter said mom you need to listen to this. This is your life. My mom did the same thing. Except they got busted so she moved in with him and they tried to take my daughter away. Now the whole family has forgiven her. I learned after that she had approached many of the men I had dated.
"The blood of the covenant is thicker than the water of the womb" We've always use this phrase wrong. It means that the bonds we choose to make are far more important than the bonds made by the water in the womb. Fits perfectly in this scenario!
Anyone that uses being drunk as an excuse is always still in the wrong. Being drunk is an inhibitor, so it will make do things you wouldn't normally do. However, it won't make you do things that are completely against your morals. So this guy probably has had thoughts about her mom but never acted until then. Edit: paused the video for the earlier comment, but yep I knew there had to be more lol.
The mother should be written off asap. I’m sorry but that isn’t a parent- she is like a teen girl competing with a girl she dislikes. The husband is disgusting. It’s one thing to have been blackout drunk and not knowing it happened. But the fact that he initiated the morning after, the texting and all that was awful. People like that are quite pathetic- even teens behave better. He was out of line and shit but her mother is the one that hurts more. A parent should never do that to a child.
19:20 my psychology take is similar to yours. That the mom sees the daughter as an extension of herself and therefore she owns whatever the daughter has. Meaning relationships, etc. It's a very toxic dynamic, full of emneshment and poor boundaries. My own biological mother was the same. I cut her out when I was 18. The fact that the daughter falls in love/dates all these guys who end up sleeping with her mom, could be a by product of childhood trauma and witnessing/experiencing an unhealthy dynamic with her mother and family. The mother likely taught the daughter poor self worth and value amongst herself as in the post she does mention that she feels like shes blind to red flags and she blames herself for the situation. It is possible to heal from this though and it's good that she's getting a divorce
it makes me happy to hear two people openly talk about cutting family off. i always hear "well, she's still your mom." or "family is family, just try to talk to her about it." but some things are just unforgivable. and the fact that her mom didn't even try to apologize makes it worse because she likely won't apologize. she'll just manipulate her daughter and gaslight her into thinking it never happened or that it didn't happen the way it did. sometimes you just need to cut family off and not look back.
17:31 I once read that the phrase "Blood is thicker than water" is actually not the full quote; it's actually "the blood of the covenant is thicker than the water of the womb," which means that the bonds that you form by choice are more important than just being related to someone. So basically, people misquote it thinking that genetics should win out over friends, but it's actually the opposite.
I’m listening to this without headphones, I’m going to buy them and this grandma next to me just starts nodding when you guys start throwing around theories.
Dude wanting to get with his fiance right after her mom is more suspicious. Probably been wanting to check that mom and daughter box his whole adulthood 🤢
Yup this sh*t happens. I told my now husband that if he EVER interacted with my mother in any way like this it would be 100% over. She had come onto previous boyfriends and I'm pretty sure she slept with one of my hs friends (17 yrs). You have no idea how damaging it is to have to think about sh*t like that.
This!! This is why I keep boundaries with nonrelated male family members. Some think it’s weird that I wouldn’t text/call them except in case of an emergency, but I have no want to even look like I’m strangely interacting like this. My brother-in-law’s girlfriend calls my husband’s phone for family events, and it’s so frustrating because she has my number but chooses to use him as a point of contact, so when I explained to him how it looks that she ignores my texts or calls but reaches out to him, calls him instead of his brother calling him, we decided that either I answer the phone or it rings out. Honestly, we got a weird reaction when I answered, but if they ask I’ll just say her behavior is weird asf, and she has no business contacting my husband so casually when I’m right here.
I love that addition, "Viscosity is not what family is about." It's now my new go-to rebuttal for people who use the "blood is thicker than water" cop-out in poor contexts.
I remember when I went to US Navy basic and our first phone call home, we were told a story of a girl who's boyfriend got her mother pregnant within the first few weeks of her being at basic.
What's funny about the expression "blood is thicker than water", is that it has been paraphrased to mean the exact opposite of the original quote. People use it to excuse shitty behavior and/or force people to side with family who is in the wrong against friends and others who are in the right. The true quote is "The blood of the covenant is thicker than the water of the womb"; which essentially means the family we make is more meaningful than the family we are simply born into.
Okay, don't give the end of this podcast an excuse for the mom. No matter her insecurities, sleeping with her daughters new husband is NOT a valid excuse. Period.
Honestly, I would lose my mind. My mother would be banned from my life, she wouldn’t get to be part of anything. And the husband? Out on the curb with all of his stuff. Time to take out the trash!
Fun fact: The full quote is actually “the blood of the covenant is thicker than the water of the womb” which originally referred to the bond you’ve made with someone you’ve shed blood with is stronger than one had with someone you’ve shared the womb with.
I know someone who’s mom slept with multiple of her boyfriends (even when she was a teenager) and just regular friends. She now has nothing to do with the woman and anyone who praises her mother.
Usually men in those scenarios have deeply rooted, and a disturbing past with mommy issues and or childhood trauma. Being preyed upon by an older women growing up (groomed), only to end up looking for that same experience later on in life. I've met several guys that exclusively date women 20 to 30 years older than them for this exact reason. (Not justifying anything) This is just an observation I've made.
I feel very sorry for her, I understand. In 2017 my only and older sister was sleeping with my boyfriend (the three of us lived together) my family knew before I did and nobody told me. I have never been the same since
I thought is was going to be the other my mom is sleeping with my husband story where they were messing around for over 15 YEARS AND HER TWIN YOUNGER BROTHERS WAS HER HUSBAND’S. Clearly I’m still not over it.
5:45 As an SA victim Not wanting to recognize or ignoring what just happened is a very common trauma response I was 13 when my mother's friend sexually assaulted me After she was done and left the room I asked my mother if we could go home To this day, my mother doesn't know what happened.
10:41 this is true, when your guy reiterates how a woman is not attractive, not his type, guess what? She probably is his type. Happened to me, my ex bf and now ex bff...
Bring back Sarah if possible!! I love watching you two bounce off of each other and reacting to each other's energy. Also, what a crazy story! This is my second time watching it
I OMFG I felt anger run up my spine it made my body shiver. I like I can’t this is just disturbing. Fucking idk what’s worse the fact that he had the audacity to fucking pretend he came home and tried to f u c k or the fact they were SENDING NUDES FOR 7 MONTHS!?!?
No because the husband admitted he was fully aware of what he was doing . It’s not the bs excuse of “taking advantage “ esp if they had been se*ting before AND he fully married you after AND COCKILY admitted that if he’d got the opportunity to he would sleep with the mum . Like no the mum is getting beaten tf up .
When I was in high school my mom would tell me about dreams she had when she slept about my friends, how she was dating so and so or even kissing my own bf. On top of that she would individually add anyone I mentioned or who she knew from extracurriculars on facebook or instagram and dm them all the time. She always talked about how she "adopted" in everyone I knew and "took care of them" but she'd actually talk to them about their relationships and even start shit, gaslighting them about me and sometimes giving them fuel to try and spread to start drama. It was such a weird control thing but I had no idea until it came to a head my senior year when my bf's parents threatened to call the police because she was dming him excplict details on how to do sexual things in a "healthy" way (backstory I got a UTI around the same time and she knew). That's just a quarter of her insanity and even today 5 years later and after I cut her off she's still reaching out to people I used to know trying to start drama about me. I have so many other stories about her but this just reminded me of each time she'd be dropping me off at school going "So I had a dream I was dating your bf and he kept trying to make-out with me!"
I just looked at the thumbnail and knew straight away this channel is going to be good. There are so many TTS reddit channels, so many that just read the post and put nothing from themselves. Two pals chilling to a reddit story is something I had no idea I needed.
I totally believe in “ you make your own family “ …. My family is extremely toxic with the way they treated me especially when my stepdad passed away last year so it’s been an extreme learning curve to realize that the family you are born with is not REALLY your true family . If this was my spouse and my mother … divorce for the spouse and for dear old mom ? Pull up to her house with a huge sign and balloons and set it on her front lawn for ALL the neighbourhood to see “ BEWARE : HOME-WRECKER LIVES HERE !!!!! Signed her daughter 😘 “
Same! My mom is a really jealous person and my dad is/was abusive (hasn't been abusive toward me in a couple years but I can never trust him again). I gave up a long time ago on expecting to feel loved by my own family, so I went out in the world and met my husband. He gives me all the love and care that I need and that they could never even think of to give. My long-time friends are there for me in a heart-beat too and I consider them family. My mom used to make me feel horrible for going to people who aren't related by blood but those are the people that make me feel safe.
This fucking story hit deep. While I was on deployment my mother attempted to sleep with my husband. I called my mom I asked one question “is it true what ____ told me” she started screaming and yelling that I’m a whore and I’ll never be good enough for anyone. He’s better off without me. She completely cut me off and turned my family against me. Moving on she was messaging him saying how could he do this to her. Blah blah blah. She said she wanted to save their “friendship” while still blocking me. When he denied her she threatened to not care FOR OUR DAUGHTER and to put her on the street. Mind you, myself and my husband are OVER SEAS. Can’t get to our daughter in a quick manner. My husband never took to her (as far as I know) but EXTREMELY long story short I cut that bitch off.
I know this is off topic but I always love your set up! It always looks so cozy! It’s a cool sleepover with friends type vibe lol Also, I love this collaboration! I watched both you guys separately since the beginning and I never would’ve expected you guys to do videos together but I love it so much!!
blood is thicker than water actually means the opposite of what ppl think and it applies perfectly to what sarah is suggesting. it goes: the blood of the covenant is thicker than the water of the womb. meaning, the ties you make freely are stronger than family ties
It's different if you came home drunk and a mistake happened.. (I'd still divorce) but this was planned, this was plotted, this was wanted. I'd want to die. I would hate every single thing about him and her. I could never forgive either. I know my revenge body would be on point tho. Cause it didn't happen to me yet I'm still sick to my stomach.
My ex told me that he wanted to have a harem. Yes...a harem...I knew then it wasn't going to work but I stayed because I loved him. He was my first real love. I ended things a little bit after that. We ended amicably and now he has a baby with his girl friend. And I'm just happy it wasn't me🥰
I’m new to this incredible channel & so I haven’t seen this other boast but omg I’m in love with how wise beyond her years she is I mean his she’s so great to have on the show I absolutely love her ❤
There was a situation similar to this in my family. Only it was so much more messed up. My great grandma hot with someone who was very young. She was in her 30s and he was 18 to 21 when they got married. My grand ma was 6 to 12ish and he sa her. She finally got the courage to tell her mom and she has held a grudge to this day that her husband liked her daughter more and blamed her for it. Family can be so broken. What they are saying is true. Family isn't always blood. But Family is always Family.
the thing about men lying they would never be with a certain woman is so true. my ex WENT OUT OF HIS WAY to pull up a certain girl’s pics on IG and insult her, and he ended up leaving me for her a few months later.
The fact that he didn’t even just go out and have a one night stand with a stranger, but chose the woman who gave birth to his wife, is like a whole other level of messed up.
The women who view their own daughters as “competition” are the absolute worst.
Stephanie Marrero
Most mothers do to certain degree or at least are jealous of them.
… you got something to confess Monika?
@@matchhead89 i'm not a mother 🙃
theirs men that do this
The premediation is sickening. This poor girl, lucky that she didn't end up starting a family with this nasty dude. Still just so disturbing.
😞 just add twins & catfishing we have the same story
@@okaycola2 Im so sorry, thats awful. 😓
You should listen to this one. She found out 22 years laterua-cam.com/video/Z-sXl7nHTSQ/v-deo.html
@@toshi9742 you clearly didn't listen to the entire thing. They had been sexting prior to the "actual" cheating. This wasn't rape, they both knew what they were doing. And he admitted he wasn't that drunk when he slept with her.
Stop trying to jump a useless mans side. He was in the wrong. He is not a victim. Don't play that bullshit.
@@hdmm9136 yeah obviously I didn’t so why go off on me? I’ve been corrected in another comment and explained that I felt too uncomfortable to continue watching after the first segment, which I am allowed to do- as much as I am allowed to form an opinion around the information I had at that time.
Hope this helps.
The expression goes, “The blood of the covenant is thicker than the water of the womb.” Meaning found family can be more important than your connection to your biological family.
L
@@caitlynjacobson6792 W
It's a nice thought and all, but I think this has been disproven as there are no credible sources for this, justvthis one dude saying that was how it was. So, unfortunately, the saying really is "blood is thicker than water". I do really like the meaning of the rephrased version though.
@@amandaa8472 I think the video proves otherwise. Family is always what you make it to be.
@@beckys3383 I wasn't arguing about that, I am all for found family. I was just saying that the belief that the expression "the blood of the covenant is thicker than the water of the womb" is the original is unfortunately wrong.
The husband is absolutely horrible for this but I would just divorce him and tell my family what he did, however, I would literally have to fist fight my mom for this 😤
Definitely!
They both deserve to be fist fought at this point lmaoo he planned it alll!!! That shook meeee
i would literally be in jail
Girl i read "fist my mom"
💯
I would just wait until the next family gathering to just stand up, make a toast, and announce “We’re getting a divorce!…because my mom F-Ed my husband the night before our wedding! Have fun with that one close relatives!” Just to walk back in the room a quick second to be like “Oh and it was planned”
@LIV Liv high key yes! Just be like “hey watch out, your partners might be next!” Because WHO DOES THAT TO THEIR OWN DAIGHTER?! THE NIGHT BEFORE HER WEDDING?! What type of narcissist parent bs is this???
Mic drop lol
Main character vibe 😄
Totally agree with this one. Some people just don't learn with words alone. A slap in the face be it physical or metaphorical is indeed needed.
Yup she shouldn’t be the one feeling humiliated. They should be the ones carrying that shame.
Even though both of them were of age, it sounds like this “mother” could possibly be a predator. The daughter said her mother had done this before? When? When she and her past boyfriends were minors? And there was a near-30 year age gap? I’m not trying to imply that she is indeed a predator, but the fact that there’s history of that behavior is disturbing.
Agree. Mother has a "thing" for not only guys as young as her daughter, but particularly guys that are with her daughter.
Exactly what I was thinking. I want to know if the boyfriend is doing okay. She said he was very drunk, she probably knew this and took advantage of him. Sure, he knew his mother has flirted with her others boyfriends, but could he ever know she would have sex with him before his and his girlfriend's wedding? And the age gap to.. I don't want to say he was r*ped, but I feel like it could be considered that in a way. He probably hid it at first due to just being ashamed, or scared to admit what her mother did. I understand if she is going to divorce him, but she needs to make sure he is okay first.
TL;DR: I hope the bf is okay. He was drunk as hell, and I highly doubt he ever thought this would happen. Also the age gap, it feels like this could be even considered r*pe.
@@RealGirlyGirl did you watch the whole video.. honestly I thought the same thing at first but, with the edit on the post saying he was sexting the mother prior…
@@V4mpirelvrs Oh i think i missed that- yeah i 100% get that, but i still do stand where i am. I really have a feeling he was pressured into it, like maybe she was blackmailed him
I just have that feeling that there's something we dont know
@@RealGirlyGirl well he said it was premeditated and he even told his wife he’d be camping at a friends house so he could sleep w his mil
I wonder why the daughter kept up a relationship with her mom when the mom had a history of trying to come onto this girl’s boyfriends. 1000% agree though that she needs to just flat out tell the family the real reason, no sugar coating. “The biggest issue was the actual cheating” as if sexting doesn’t count as cheating?? What?? Exchanging nudes and sexting IS cheating. Sleeping with someone who isn’t your partner IS cheating. Any romantic or sexual action that happens with someone else or multiple other people while having a partner IS cheating.
I think maybe she still wanted a relationship with her mother and brushed it off, and now she's completely letting it out. Because I would be pissed off too if someone slept with my husband, so I guess that was the breaking point for her.
Sometimes it’s easier to just keep them around instead of cutting them off. I’m in that case with my mom. Nothing this crazy but still
@@smolsheep2372 Genuine question but how would it be easier to keep someone around who causes you trouble/pain in your life? Like I know it's easier said than done to cut a family member out of your life, especially a mom, but wouldn't the effort to do that be more worth it than causing yourself more pain and potentially trauma?
@@savagerose3077 Maybe she was gaslighting herself and thought she would eventually stop?
@@savagerose3077 Unless there's serious abuse immediate family members are difficult to cut off. Everyone's tolerance for the bad behaviours of family are very different. I personally would have gone low/no contact with my parent well before this point but for others it takes a hell of a lot more to break contact. And most of the time you have to cut more than just that one family member unless everyone else cuts that person off as well. And maybe she could deal with the previous flirting but didn't think her egg donor nor her partner would go this far. Too many factors to say for certain
I wonder how the ex-husband's family reacted on hearing the news. I know that if my son did that, I'd beat the shit out of him.
Edit: Welp found another
@@toshi9742 He then “snuck” back into the house, laid in bed with his fiancé and INITIATED SEX with her. He said himself he didn’t feel taken advantage of and they had been sexting for several months. Your comment doesn’t apply in this situation.
@@Felorina yikes. You have a problem.
@@toshi9742 How so? He admitted to her that they planned it… so he wasn’t taken advantage of at all. Did you even watch the whole episode?
@@Felorina I didn’t. If they somehow planned to fuck the night before the wedding then sure it wasn’t however I wasn’t watching anymore after the initial information they had and they were keen to go down on him.
As a survivor myself it was disgusting and triggering and I did not (and will not) subject myself to it anymore than I wish to.
They had sex, that was bad. But for me the even bigger break in trust is the lying about it. Also, the fact he doesn't see sexting as cheating... About the family, cut the mom off and tell the rest the truth. If anyone fights op on it, cut them off too, they will truly show you who they are.
I need to talk to my therapist after hearing this story. It’s giving me trust issues.
Same, I’m never letting another boyfriend meet my mom goddamn this story is insane
Girl!!! I was thinking the same, this shit hit me
Right. Just made my bf block my mother on Facebook
🤣🤣🤣🤣🤣🤣 I'm just kidding.
Seriously! 😥 im side eyeing my mom now 😂
I don’t understand how people like this find each other. Like imagine coming on to your mother in law and then she actually takes you up on it! What? So glad she divorced him.
“Guys will never shit on a woman unless they want to f*k them” YESS! This is so freaking true.
I don’t get what this means
Oh wait nvm just got to that part of the video.
“Not handsome enough to tempt me”
I unfortunately learned how true that phrase is yesterday
it's the same mindset like kindergarten boys bully the girl he likes. some people just never grow out of that phase which is ... sad
I can't believe some people have mothers like this. This sounds like something out of a nightmare. I'm so thankful to have an unconditionally loving and caring mother who would never in a million years scar me as this mother had done.
Right? My mother’s a narcissist and I absolutely believe she would do this if ever given the chance.
Now that I have a niece, it confuses me even more.
I WANT her to have a better life than me. I want her to have everything I never did. I would give my whole life just for her happiness. And she’s 19 so it’s not like I haven’t had time to think about it lol
It’s just mind boggling honesty.
The "blood is thicker than water" has been twisted somewhere along the way. The full saying is " The blood of the covenant is thicker than the waters of the womb" which is the exact opposite of that first quote.
I heard another story almost exactly like this before, a psychiatrist weighed in and said the mothers issue isn’t needing validation by sleeping with younger men, she would’ve sleep with a DIFFERENT younger man if that were the case and not gone after her daughters man. When a parent sexually singles out their child’s partner it’s because the parent has severe and irrational jealousy issues of their child and views the child not as their child but rather as their competition in life. This behavior will usually not change because the parent has spent the child’s whole life viewing them as competition and at this point that’s their dynamic. The psychiatrist also mentioned that this occurs far more often in mother/daughter relationships than it does son/father relationships and often stems from narcissistic mothers who blame the child for “wrecking their bodies, stealing their youth and stopping them from fulfilling dreams they’ve had for their lives”. It’s completely stupid. There’s no salvaging that relationship, you have to bail.
Oooh I like this comment
@@BeepBoop-z2v Lol thank you but I can’t take credit for it, it’s really interesting though, right?!
she needs to cut out the mother, not the husband
I was going to say…her mother’s definitely a narcissist. So is mine. She absolutely flirts with my boyfriends and acts like it’s not obvious.
Luckily, the men I date either ignore her or laugh about it…like most guys would.
@@taghazoutmoon5031 What?! Cut the BOTH out. That seems obvious.
You know how they say “violence is not the answer”? This is the exception, violence is 100% the answer in this situation.
I agree. Absolutely
She should beat up the husband and the mother
A good example of violence being put to a good use!!
I HATE she says “she was not enough”
NO
STOP THAT RIGHT NOW!
He was not enough for YOU!
You did not “fail” here 🤬
So angry!
“two generations of wet” SARAH PLEASE 😭😭😭
💀💀
katie: If so, it was foolish on his part. women can smell and taste that stuff.
Sarah is such a savage bro 🤣
If my partner and mother did this, I'd be punching. Hope she gets the support she needs from dealing with this crazy
I’m sorry but I’d go to jail for brutal murder
Like I have such sever trust issues that I’d honestly go psycho
Y'all are so much more civil than me.
They’re both absolutely abhorrent. Kick them both to the curb. Hope they’re in one of those states where she can sue for causing a divorce.
There was an inverse version of this story also on reddit. A woman in her 40s to 50s married a younger man in his 30s. She suspected he was cheating and caught him in the act on the house security camera, WITH HER SON who was like 18-22 or something. She confronted them about it and they both said they wanted to be together and the husband left her for her son. I feel so bad for both these women. I have family problems, just like anyone else, but thankfully nothing like this. I genuinely cannot fathom the lack of empathy and consideration these people have toward their CHOSEN partners. Don’t want commitment? Don’t commit! I really just don’t understand people, never have and probably never will. To me this is such a simple thing to say no to.
They went over this on the show
Oh sh-… Do you have a link to this post?
That's nasty as hell I'm a dude and I cringe so hard
I literally gasped on the first story while ironing, then had to sit down when the update came. Heart breaking.
I had to sit down for the first line😪
I would divorce my husband, cut off my family, and get a therapist to help undo all the crap my family has done to me and really accept that I don't need them in my life.
the fact that he felt the need to reassure her that he wasnt attracted by her mother in the first place is a red flag
I'm a heavy drinker and I'm scandalous, but this is beyond anything I could ever even think of doing. This is fucking disgusting.
Throw her mother and husband away. Expeditiously. And she doesn’t have to forgive them ever. Hope she finds the peace, love, and family she deserves.
Can we start to normalize not having to explain ourselves and why we are getting divorced? I had a terrible time when my family and friends demanded why instead of offering support. Obviously when a divorce happens there are reasons and you'll be curious, but if you're not in the relationship then you're not owed an explanation. Divorce is hard. If you love your friend or family member, just be there for them. She shouldn't have to explain to them.
right, in all honesty, people are just nosy! people will literally add to a persons struggle during a divorce by not only asking questions, but even getting upset that they don’t want to answer those questions! it’s so messed up.
That's exactly what I said. You owed none one an explanation. You can let them know what happened when you are ready to talk about it and that's it
Damn, i feel for this person. Getting cheated on is an absolute horrible thing to have happen to. People who cheat should have bigger consequences.
I agree. the cheating is already a whole thing in itself, but with her mother of all people?? that's downright repulsive!
They should be shunded until the partner forgives them
A reminder that "Blood is thicker than water" is a shortening of the original quote, which completely turns the original meaning on its head.
The original is "The blood _of the Covenant_ is thicker than the water _of the Womb."_
It's saying _literally_ about choosing the people you consider family.
So... my great aunt on my dad's side married her daughters widower whom she had 3 children with. I'm pretty sure the kids still call her gma too... I know it's not as severe but I'm pretty sure they hooked up for the first time at the daughter's funeral. My grandpa also refuses to be around her (she's my grandma's sister) because he's afraid she's going to force herself on him...
Wtf…
😳
My sis was friends with a girl who had a mom just like this. Talk of the town. This kind of behavior destroys people and families
I would love to be in the courtroom when her lawyer explains why she is filing for divorce! I also hope he gets nothing and has to pay her.
Gosh what a story! Yikes. What a disgusting mother! The only thing I want to add is, I can't believe the husband. It sounds like he implied that sexting wasn't cheating. Leaving it out because it wasn't the physical act, etc. That's insane!!! If it wasn't cheating in his eyes, why didn't he tell her sooner? Obviously he knows it shows extra premeditation. I feel for op so much! I really hope she has a wonderful life after this. She deserves it.
My wife's mom is the same way. She was disappointed her kid was gay for the reason she could not steal her spouse. She is a legit narcissist, so is this mother.
That is so fucking odd what conversation does that even come up in??? I’m sorry that’s your wife’s mom but I hope you two are happy and thriving 💜
@@rebeccatomlin3916 literally every conversation. When they are narcissistic, its like they have no filter. Constantly on her about getting w a man so they could have his $ and she would impy sleeping w him. Our wedding she threw a fit and told her `you were mine first` . Thank you for the kind words
i LIVE for the episodes with sarah!!! their commentary is so fucking good
Sameee & Sarah's new podcast is 🔥 too.
@@belindarocky961 i haven’t listened to it yet but i’m sooo excited. i love hearing how sarah’s brain works it’s so interesting bc she articulates things so well
“Chosen family” isn’t a gay community thing. That is something that has been going on in different communities forever! As a result of toxic families and broken families people have been forming their chosen families for years.
I agree with Sarah, fight the mom. She needs to learn.
Omg, my daughter said mom you need to listen to this. This is your life. My mom did the same thing. Except they got busted so she moved in with him and they tried to take my daughter away. Now the whole family has forgiven her. I learned after that she had approached many of the men I had dated.
"The blood of the covenant is thicker than the water of the womb" We've always use this phrase wrong. It means that the bonds we choose to make are far more important than the bonds made by the water in the womb.
Fits perfectly in this scenario!
Anyone that uses being drunk as an excuse is always still in the wrong. Being drunk is an inhibitor, so it will make do things you wouldn't normally do. However, it won't make you do things that are completely against your morals. So this guy probably has had thoughts about her mom but never acted until then.
Edit: paused the video for the earlier comment, but yep I knew there had to be more lol.
The mother should be written off asap. I’m sorry but that isn’t a parent- she is like a teen girl competing with a girl she dislikes. The husband is disgusting. It’s one thing to have been blackout drunk and not knowing it happened. But the fact that he initiated the morning after, the texting and all that was awful. People like that are quite pathetic- even teens behave better. He was out of line and shit but her mother is the one that hurts more. A parent should never do that to a child.
19:20 my psychology take is similar to yours. That the mom sees the daughter as an extension of herself and therefore she owns whatever the daughter has. Meaning relationships, etc. It's a very toxic dynamic, full of emneshment and poor boundaries. My own biological mother was the same. I cut her out when I was 18. The fact that the daughter falls in love/dates all these guys who end up sleeping with her mom, could be a by product of childhood trauma and witnessing/experiencing an unhealthy dynamic with her mother and family. The mother likely taught the daughter poor self worth and value amongst herself as in the post she does mention that she feels like shes blind to red flags and she blames herself for the situation. It is possible to heal from this though and it's good that she's getting a divorce
it makes me happy to hear two people openly talk about cutting family off. i always hear "well, she's still your mom." or "family is family, just try to talk to her about it." but some things are just unforgivable. and the fact that her mom didn't even try to apologize makes it worse because she likely won't apologize. she'll just manipulate her daughter and gaslight her into thinking it never happened or that it didn't happen the way it did. sometimes you just need to cut family off and not look back.
17:31 I once read that the phrase "Blood is thicker than water" is actually not the full quote; it's actually "the blood of the covenant is thicker than the water of the womb," which means that the bonds that you form by choice are more important than just being related to someone. So basically, people misquote it thinking that genetics should win out over friends, but it's actually the opposite.
So glad this wasn't a "how do I forgive him" post, that is totally unforgivable
I’m listening to this without headphones, I’m going to buy them and this grandma next to me just starts nodding when you guys start throwing around theories.
Dude wanting to get with his fiance right after her mom is more suspicious. Probably been wanting to check that mom and daughter box his whole adulthood 🤢
I thought about that too. That is probably like a fantasy for him.
Yup this sh*t happens. I told my now husband that if he EVER interacted with my mother in any way like this it would be 100% over. She had come onto previous boyfriends and I'm pretty sure she slept with one of my hs friends (17 yrs). You have no idea how damaging it is to have to think about sh*t like that.
This!! This is why I keep boundaries with nonrelated male family members. Some think it’s weird that I wouldn’t text/call them except in case of an emergency, but I have no want to even look like I’m strangely interacting like this. My brother-in-law’s girlfriend calls my husband’s phone for family events, and it’s so frustrating because she has my number but chooses to use him as a point of contact, so when I explained to him how it looks that she ignores my texts or calls but reaches out to him, calls him instead of his brother calling him, we decided that either I answer the phone or it rings out. Honestly, we got a weird reaction when I answered, but if they ask I’ll just say her behavior is weird asf, and she has no business contacting my husband so casually when I’m right here.
I'm pretty sure my ex husband slept with my own father. They're both pretty nasty individuals so I wouldn't doubt it.
Yasssss can't wait. This is the earliest I've ever been LOL love you two.
I love that addition, "Viscosity is not what family is about." It's now my new go-to rebuttal for people who use the "blood is thicker than water" cop-out in poor contexts.
“viscosity is not what family’s about” i love Sarah
I remember when I went to US Navy basic and our first phone call home, we were told a story of a girl who's boyfriend got her mother pregnant within the first few weeks of her being at basic.
what the fuck is wrong with people man
Eww
Good god. 😟
After she told him that she used to flirt with her dates he just wanted a part of it while while pretending to be disgusted by her behavior.
I would straight ghost my mom if she ever did this. I'd change my name and address and never speak to her again.
What's funny about the expression "blood is thicker than water", is that it has been paraphrased to mean the exact opposite of the original quote.
People use it to excuse shitty behavior and/or force people to side with family who is in the wrong against friends and others who are in the right.
The true quote is "The blood of the covenant is thicker than the water of the womb"; which essentially means the family we make is more meaningful than the family we are simply born into.
I can't remember if I already read this on Reddit or saw y'all react to it in a longer video. Sarah, love the videos with you in them!
@LIV Liv yeah after listening to it, I definitely know I heard them react to it. I remembered Sarah's points about chosen family
This story made me feel physically ill
Okay, don't give the end of this podcast an excuse for the mom. No matter her insecurities, sleeping with her daughters new husband is NOT a valid excuse. Period.
Honestly, I would lose my mind. My mother would be banned from my life, she wouldn’t get to be part of anything. And the husband? Out on the curb with all of his stuff. Time to take out the trash!
HE DIDN’T GO SHOWER BEFORE HE GOT IN BED WITH YOU?!
THAT part!! 🤢🤢🤢
Fun fact: The full quote is actually “the blood of the covenant is thicker than the water of the womb” which originally referred to the bond you’ve made with someone you’ve shed blood with is stronger than one had with someone you’ve shared the womb with.
I know someone who’s mom slept with multiple of her boyfriends (even when she was a teenager) and just regular friends. She now has nothing to do with the woman and anyone who praises her mother.
Fists would be FLYING. Absolute animals.
The best revenge is shrimp tails in the curtain rods
Hahaha another Charlotte Dobre watcher! That revenge was SOOOOO simple but so evil.
Usually men in those scenarios have deeply rooted, and a disturbing past with mommy issues and or childhood trauma. Being preyed upon by an older women growing up (groomed), only to end up looking for that same experience later on in life. I've met several guys that exclusively date women 20 to 30 years older than them for this exact reason. (Not justifying anything) This is just an observation I've made.
“May I introduce you to my fists, Sense & Sensibility?”
My younger sibling has dated TWO of my exes!! Literally broke my heart
Big no, best friends and siblings are a big no omg
@@annasusananil3108 exactly!!
I feel very sorry for her, I understand. In 2017 my only and older sister was sleeping with my boyfriend (the three of us lived together) my family knew before I did and nobody told me.
I have never been the same since
that’s messed up i’m sorry and hope you’ve found happiness
I'm so sorry that happened to you
I thought is was going to be the other my mom is sleeping with my husband story where they were messing around for over 15 YEARS AND HER TWIN YOUNGER BROTHERS WAS HER HUSBAND’S.
Clearly I’m still not over it.
5:45
As an SA victim
Not wanting to recognize or ignoring what just happened is a very common trauma response
I was 13 when my mother's friend sexually assaulted me
After she was done and left the room
I asked my mother if we could go home
To this day, my mother doesn't know what happened.
i know it’s extremely difficult but i think if you do decide to tell her it will help you deal with your emotions and could be beneficial for you
NOT THEM SEXTING FOR SEVERAL MONTHS BEFORE?????????????? HUHHHH?????????????
10:41 this is true, when your guy reiterates how a woman is not attractive, not his type, guess what? She probably is his type. Happened to me, my ex bf and now ex bff...
Oh definitely. I had a boyfriend like this. He Would talk shit about my friends and then I discovered texts that he was trying to fuck them!
Bring back Sarah if possible!! I love watching you two bounce off of each other and reacting to each other's energy. Also, what a crazy story! This is my second time watching it
Ok when she asked if he showered I'm between I legit almost threw up.
Incredibly, unbelievably disgusting, boiling rage coming out of my skin
I OMFG I felt anger run up my spine it made my body shiver. I like I can’t this is just disturbing. Fucking idk what’s worse the fact that he had the audacity to fucking pretend he came home and tried to f u c k or the fact they were SENDING NUDES FOR 7 MONTHS!?!?
No because the husband admitted he was fully aware of what he was doing . It’s not the bs excuse of “taking advantage “ esp if they had been se*ting before AND he fully married you after AND COCKILY admitted that if he’d got the opportunity to he would sleep with the mum . Like no the mum is getting beaten tf up .
When I was in high school my mom would tell me about dreams she had when she slept about my friends, how she was dating so and so or even kissing my own bf. On top of that she would individually add anyone I mentioned or who she knew from extracurriculars on facebook or instagram and dm them all the time. She always talked about how she "adopted" in everyone I knew and "took care of them" but she'd actually talk to them about their relationships and even start shit, gaslighting them about me and sometimes giving them fuel to try and spread to start drama. It was such a weird control thing but I had no idea until it came to a head my senior year when my bf's parents threatened to call the police because she was dming him excplict details on how to do sexual things in a "healthy" way (backstory I got a UTI around the same time and she knew). That's just a quarter of her insanity and even today 5 years later and after I cut her off she's still reaching out to people I used to know trying to start drama about me. I have so many other stories about her but this just reminded me of each time she'd be dropping me off at school going "So I had a dream I was dating your bf and he kept trying to make-out with me!"
I just looked at the thumbnail and knew straight away this channel is going to be good. There are so many TTS reddit channels, so many that just read the post and put nothing from themselves. Two pals chilling to a reddit story is something I had no idea I needed.
I totally believe in “ you make your own family “ …. My family is extremely toxic with the way they treated me especially when my stepdad passed away last year so it’s been an extreme learning curve to realize that the family you are born with is not REALLY your true family .
If this was my spouse and my mother … divorce for the spouse and for dear old mom ? Pull up to her house with a huge sign and balloons and set it on her front lawn for ALL the neighbourhood to see “ BEWARE : HOME-WRECKER LIVES HERE !!!!! Signed her daughter 😘 “
Same! My mom is a really jealous person and my dad is/was abusive (hasn't been abusive toward me in a couple years but I can never trust him again). I gave up a long time ago on expecting to feel loved by my own family, so I went out in the world and met my husband. He gives me all the love and care that I need and that they could never even think of to give. My long-time friends are there for me in a heart-beat too and I consider them family. My mom used to make me feel horrible for going to people who aren't related by blood but those are the people that make me feel safe.
I wish these two had their own podcast together ♥️♥️♥️ they’re amazing together with these chaos stories
I love when Sarah is on!! 💗💗💗 she’s so spicy 🌶 with the BIG FACTS….😘😘😘
“stepmom is his favorite genre” HAHA sorry for her experience but oh my god
This fucking story hit deep. While I was on deployment my mother attempted to sleep with my husband. I called my mom I asked one question “is it true what ____ told me” she started screaming and yelling that I’m a whore and I’ll never be good enough for anyone. He’s better off without me. She completely cut me off and turned my family against me. Moving on she was messaging him saying how could he do this to her. Blah blah blah. She said she wanted to save their “friendship” while still blocking me. When he denied her she threatened to not care FOR OUR DAUGHTER and to put her on the street. Mind you, myself and my husband are OVER SEAS. Can’t get to our daughter in a quick manner. My husband never took to her (as far as I know) but EXTREMELY long story short I cut that bitch off.
Side note; she is still married to my dad. He was completely in the dark until I told him last week. Hopefully he leaves her.
@@ooptheloop669 and your family cut you off? What kind of messed up crap is that?
I know this is off topic but I always love your set up! It always looks so cozy! It’s a cool sleepover with friends type vibe lol Also, I love this collaboration! I watched both you guys separately since the beginning and I never would’ve expected you guys to do videos together but I love it so much!!
She’s literally trying to compete with her daughter, that’s sick!
OP's mom is a baddie in her younger years and never moved on from it and stayed delusional even hurting her own baby
I need an “I love divorce” sticker for my mom that would be hilarious. 😂 (She’s still friendly with my dad and he would die laughing.)
This podcast is so cool. It makes me feel so cozy watching you guys chilling with the blankets drinking wine. Makes me feel warm and fuzzy
blood is thicker than water actually means the opposite of what ppl think and it applies perfectly to what sarah is suggesting. it goes: the blood of the covenant is thicker than the water of the womb. meaning, the ties you make freely are stronger than family ties
It's different if you came home drunk and a mistake happened.. (I'd still divorce) but this was planned, this was plotted, this was wanted. I'd want to die. I would hate every single thing about him and her. I could never forgive either. I know my revenge body would be on point tho. Cause it didn't happen to me yet I'm still sick to my stomach.
I was walking around the mall listening to this. I literally started talking to an employee about this story cause holy shit
My ex told me that he wanted to have a harem. Yes...a harem...I knew then it wasn't going to work but I stayed because I loved him. He was my first real love. I ended things a little bit after that. We ended amicably and now he has a baby with his girl friend. And I'm just happy it wasn't me🥰
HOW is this my first video with Sarah? She's bloody hilarious I am in love with her 😭❤️ I need to see them all now.
I’m new to this incredible channel & so I haven’t seen this other boast but omg I’m in love with how wise beyond her years she is I mean his she’s so great to have on the show I absolutely love her ❤
For me, the fact that he slept with her the next morning is the most fucked up shit. Cause it was for sure intentional and part of the "experience"
There was a situation similar to this in my family. Only it was so much more messed up. My great grandma hot with someone who was very young. She was in her 30s and he was 18 to 21 when they got married. My grand ma was 6 to 12ish and he sa her. She finally got the courage to tell her mom and she has held a grudge to this day that her husband liked her daughter more and blamed her for it. Family can be so broken. What they are saying is true. Family isn't always blood. But Family is always Family.
the thing about men lying they would never be with a certain woman is so true.
my ex WENT OUT OF HIS WAY to pull up a certain girl’s pics on IG and insult her, and he ended up leaving me for her a few months later.
in the first 10 seconds, that "Oh cheez" got me
Even if he blood was 90% vodka it'd still be unforgivable, it's not a drunk mistake
The fact that he didn’t even just go out and have a one night stand with a stranger, but chose the woman who gave birth to his wife, is like a whole other level of messed up.