1. Be authentic 2. Let us know your intentions 3. Give us time/ space 4. Grasp our uniqueness (" Get us") 5. Inspire us to be the best we can be Yes, this is exactly true as an infp.. what we needed
Remember that INFP’s can have difficulties to stay in reality, often thinking of the dream relationships and can often end in breakup because they dont feel like the partner ”was the one”. This is because we are very creative.
Yeah, sometimes I accidently start dreaming about unrealistic dates and situations with my crush. But I try to stop myself from these unhealthy imaginations because I don't want to fall in love with someone who doesn't even exist.
Another thing I'm finding a little too late as an INFP is a need and way to attract me is to be as good of an active listener as I am. Show interest and listen, too. I can listen to someone I'm interested in for ages with deep and genuine gusto. But I'm finding that as a result, I seem to attract takers. People who just want to be listened to, but realy don't reciprocate too much.
Yup I lost interest pretty quick when I tried several ways to guide the guy to ask questions about me but he didn’t. Probably he was another narcissistic person, which apparently I attract. I ghosted him. Did not thought about it twice.😊
Yes. Definitely the worst thing. Don't "get" them, put them down, discourage them. THAT is exactly what I grew up with. : ( What is nice about your videos, Lex, is that you show me what is possible. From what I can tell, you were cherished and your family "gets" you. You are the example of what an INFP becomes when understood, loved, and accepted. I have learned how to do this for myself. Love myself. It is going to take a lot of work to get myself right.
Oh gosh! INFP here! This is sooo true! Ive been in so many dates. Good looking, with facades, not true to themselves, try to get me with their money, rich.....name it. Dating was so hard cause guys wouldnt be able to tell the truth when i asked them straight up what they're looking for! Some will say nothing serious (id tell them i respect that but not for me) then they'll change their mind just to get under my sheets. Luckily im not that stupid. I got attracted to my boyfiend for being true to himself, open, real, honnest, he's different and owns it. Not pretending to be someone else to fit in.
I'm an ENFP and encouraging or "catalyzing" others comes naturally. It seems really congruent with INFPs who I think need that sometimes. I'm dating an INFP and it's going very well, she finds my vulnerable moments attractive somehow. She also enjoys the encouragement while I enjoy her deep, quirky, spirit.
@@user-lv4ok9vo5o It turned out she was personality disordered, the INFP. She dumped me, went into therapy right away. I was most frustrated as she revealed she had these issues for a long time, hid them, and then dated fully admitting (though not apologizing) that her own issues caused our breakup and my hurt. I was not impressed.
I could relate to all of this. I am highly attracted to every single trait that you mentioned. I yearn for people who inspire me and appreciate me for who I really am. I have a tendancy to talk down on myself too. I am happy for the both of you!
INFP male here. While I have had flings with an ESFJ and an ENFP at one point, the only women who have shown interest in me are generally other INFPs or INTJs. In these cases they happened to be interested in me from the start, and I happened to notice and reciprocate. Maybe it has something to do with sharing Fi and Te? I absolutely hate being the aggressor, and I found dating to be a miserable experience. It might just be because I value authenticity, but I love sexually aggressive women, if only because they tend to put me at ease by making me feel desired. Otherwise, it's just a waste of time trying to woo someone who probably wouldn't be interested in the first place. God knows I've screwed it up enough not to want to try again. Coming off too strong? You bet I did that, and what a terrible mistake it was. The word "creepy" is my least favorite word in the English language, because more people had predicated it to describe than any other. Just chilling and being myself? For a man, that's the equivalent of telling him to do nothing, from which nothing comes. Now I'm currently in a long term relationship with an INTJ woman whom I met online, and she wanted me long before we ever had the opportunity to meet in person, and even after a devastating setback made that seem impossible. I had no desire for a long distance relationship myself, but we remained friends until our fortunes changed and she moved to my state and seeing her was actually possible. Now in the time elapsed I'd had four flings with various women, which I might not have done had I known better. I had only had one serious relationship prior. During these years, I honestly believed that I had no hope of finding another, and that every sexual opportunity could well have been my last. As for my INTJ woman, she had made up her mind about me four years prior, had no doubt about me the first day we met in person, and has no doubt now as I write this six years later while we live under the same roof. When I asked her about it, still mystified by what God had granted me, she quoted the opening passage of "Their Eyes Were Watching God" by Zora Neale Hurston: "Ships at a distance have every man’s wish on board. For some they come in with the tide. For others they sail forever on the horizon, never out of sight, never landing until the Watcher turns his eyes away in resignation, his dreams mocked to death by Time. That is the life of men." "Now, women forget all those things they don’t want to remember and remember everything they don’t want to forget. The dream is the truth. Then they act and do things accordingly."
There's something I'd like to pitch in here. ANY relationship requires acceptance and encouragement of both partners' true selves; if someone feels like they have to go against their identity/strengths all the time, they will inevitably dissociate from the source of that disconnection over time. The reason this point is mentioned so many times for the INFP in particular is that their strengths and qualities are a) very, very rare and b) therefore often undervalued, misunderstood and unappreciated, which is why what would not even be a problem for most other "conventional" types (acceptance of self, fitting in, being appreciated) becomes a VERY major and chronic problem for the INFP, because they feel like no one needs them or values what makes them who they are. No one likes to feel like a worthless cog in the great machine of life - and INFPs feel this pain especially intensely because of how rarely they or their work are liked. Moreover, they are also perfectionists who are very hard on themselves, so they don't give themselves any affirmation to compensate for the lack of external affirmation either. This is why it is so important for their partner to understand them ON THEIR OWN TERMS, to really step into their shoes and understand THEIR values rather than thinking of what society respects or cares for, and encourage that (rest assured, they will receive this full, deep empathetic understanding and encouragement in return). Material prosperity often eludes INFPs, but to be loved for who we are is perhaps the greatest gift we could ever be given (except perhaps a journal, a good book, or some art supplies ;) ). P.S: Loved the reference to Audioslave's song "Be Yourself" at the end. That song is a classic!
My last relationship caused me to disassociate with myself and it broke me. Now I am in a position that requires a lot of healing and to find myself again.
#2 is the biggest issue right now. I’m so glad you mentioned this. If a man opens a conversation with “hey beautiful” it hits me as an absolute insult. Give me enough respect to allow me to make the best decision for myself by telling me your intentions. It would be nice for a conversation to open as super casual or something more substantial. Love your videos!
"I like you. What are you going to do with this information?" That's such an INFP thing to say and very indicative of our mind sets. We'll chase to the end of the Earth as long as the other person reciprocates interest. But we won't cross that line until the other party has expressed interest because we have general problems with being manipulators and refuse to play games without clear rules.
Guys, I couldn't relate more to these points. Thank you for this video. I've been the inspiring and encouraging influence to other people, as an INFP man, and in this way I've cultivated many rewarding and important friendships. Relationships are another issue, though. At this point in my life, where I've acquired the confidence to just be me, I let people know: "This is me, quirks and flaws and all. I want you to know I see your unique spark and would like to get to know you better. If you're up for it, let me know. If not, no harm done." Sometimes they're intimidated by this directness, sometimes they're intrigued, sometimes they're not interested. But at least I've made my intentions clear.
Loved this! I have been married for 25 years and the general points you made certainly ticked the boxes of what attracted me to her. The "vibe" of someone who is quietly confident, driven, authentic, and encouraging/inspirational is just magic. I also appreciated the peek into your relationship, modeling what a healthy one could look like. Good on you guys. Finally I also really loved the little nod to Audioslave at the end. You guys seem like awesome people. Wishing blessings to you both.
One of my good friends is an ENFP and he has romantic feelings for me. I feel the same but being an INFP I have a fear of commitment. Watching this video help me sort out some feelings and I think I would like to try dating him.
I can relate so much! I'm also an INFP, my partner is also an ENFP and we've been together for 4 years. Our passion really connects us and we inspire each other everyday. He feels more grounded because of me and I feel more capable because of him.
I’m an INFP and I went on a date with an INFP about a week ago and we got on soooo well.. ended up spending pretty much the whole week round hers... just wondered what people’s thoughts on the strengths and weaknesses of a relationship between 2 INFPs might be :)
There are so many variables in relationships anything can happen. As for same type relationship issues are having the same type weaknesses and strengths. So don't expect them to happily do all the mundane tasks you dread or have a wide circle of friends to help in situations of need. On the plus side is the intimacy of feeling understood, be careful of there values that don't align with yours you may step on them.
I've had two flings with other INFPs, and while I loved them to death, I can't imagine that either would have worked out well in the long run. We were both weak in the same places.
Im a male INFP , unfortunately i can't relate to any of these because i never know how to catch the signal from others. This inner thoughts somehow do overthink over everything.
It's so accurate! These things worked really well for me and my husband in building our relationship. The most important condition for INFP's to find the right person is to stick to their values and standards no matter how much pressure their close people and society put on them. Sometimes people don't get us but INFP's have a kind of a compass in their heart. It leads them to their true love and harmonious relationships. Thank you for sharing your thoughts on this matter.
INFP here and this is 💯 accurate ❤️ money doesnt matter to me and most guys I talk to use that to get me, I needed space to contemplate everything and that was the mistake in my past relationships ,they tend to not give me space even if I ask them to and tell me it will make things worst its exhausting when you dont get that space.
Thanks for the shout love! And thank you two for letting me take care of Oscar! I had such a blast and it was so cool getting to build a friendship with him! This video was adorable and you two are so brave for doing this. I know James was super nervous but I think he did great!
Aww that was some lovely singing at the end. You know what's funny? Your husband looks very much like I pictured him to be going by what you said about him. And then he's here and I see soft eys and think: YES, Lex, well done! You've opened the doors for the right man indeed! And so has he, for this amazing pool of reflection (to the outside and inside. We are mirrors and we function only with polishing, especially when getting in touch with ppl will leave fingerprints all over very very easily XD)
In my youth, I had a habit of living a relationship in my head before I even getting to know the guy to the point that I was already bored with the thought of them.
Omg I am in my youth and I do that ... When I'm hurt my fantasy partner in my head comes to pick me up and we have a good time, either I console myself with it or I change my mood through this. Do we stop at some point ?
@@madameproblemes6548 At least for me, it was always a form of self protection to imagine how the relationship might be instead of actually being in one. Many people can be selfish and even cruel while pursuing to fulfill their own wants and needs while disregarding how their actions will effect others. To some level we INFPs will always daydream. But if you find your own strength and balance of who you are as well as a partner who loves and accepts your weird ways, the need to have fantasies will subside.
I loved this topic, and especially with combining your 2 different personalities and sharing your own experiences in all its honesty. Real life stuff. Great you incorporated James' music. Added a really nice aspect to this video. Well done Lex
Y'all are just too cute together!!! Many thanks for your honesty & openness - it helped me as I'm sure it has helped others, as well! Take care & God bless!! 💕
One of my good friends is an infp and her husband is enfp and our relationship is so easy and comfortable. I can go visit and just do my thing without worrying about constantly being together or entertaining each other. I love this family as my own.
Happy Valentine's day too, you lucky two! It's very hilarious to see a very nervous extrovert sitting beside an apparently stone-cold introvert haha 😂 You are right James, at least in my case I love embracing my INFPness, and also everyone else's. It's something that from the day you realize it's value and it's uniqueness, you can't ignore whenever it comes across you again 😊. Have a great time, byyee!
+ST710 Thank you so much. 😂 I'm definitely more in my element in front of a camera. I've gotten a lot better at least. Glad you embrace your own uniqueness... that is the best quality to have. Thanks for your comment xx
I agree about seeing people being authentic is attractive to an INFP. I will say though that what won me over about my husband is that I felt like I could most be myself (authentic) around him more than others that I had dated.
“I like you! What are you gonna do with this information?!” Hahaha I love it 😂 maybe not THAT literally, but as an INFP I know what you mean. Great video, and you make a super cute couple! Xx
Thank you Lexi and James for your transparency and humility... I and very attracted to an INFP and, being myself an ENFP, I can fully relate to you. This video helped to understand that it's not because I have no news that it means that she's not interested. She needs time and space.
Wait, are there people who want to attract INFPs? Why would anyone? Out of pity? At gun point? That's what I thought when I read the title of the video (and yes, I'm a true INFP)
I am in complete agreement about the authenticity thing. I’ve had guys hit on me at school and it seemed like they were doing it on a dare. Of course I could see through them either they were trying too hard or just being mean. Either way my heart was never broken.
This is so me! Haha The part where you were talking about someone being themselves and not scared of showing what they're into is awesome! There was this guy (he's an INTP) I felt in love with. My first reciprocate love. He was very interested about space and that kind of stuff, and he even told me he wanted to be an astronaut. Like, he was so convicted about it, and I even wasn't that type of girl, I mean, a girl that really enjoy space themes but, I just liked that about him! He was just himself and wasn't scared of what people would say about him, and I felt soo like: YES! If that's what you're passionate about, just go for it! I support you! Haha He was smart but it was genuine, he wasn't cocky about it, u know? I just felt in love with him instantly haha (and he felt in love with me too. He told me I was the first person he loved :') ) Too bad it didn't work out :/ I miss him ;-;
I'm an INFP and there's this guy that I like (he's an ENFJ) even though he thinks that I have to stay away from him whenever he's stressed and frustrated from work and says that his heart is cold and all, I'm not scared of him and it makes me want to be there for him. I make him feel that I'm there for him through our communications via messenger since we live a thousand kilometers from each other. We met personally met once and it was new and fine to me. The other day my mom and guardian found out about us. They made me cut my connection with him, delete pur conversation even demanded me to block him. I don't understand why but I did as I was told since I've been tired of talking back against them. I told him that I have to block him though, I'm honest and still feel bad doing that to him. Before that happened, I remember him giving me a nickname with a
I heard James talk about the INFP community commenting. And I thought to my self, “I really told to resonate with what Alex expands on but I never want to comment.” I was thinking how funny that was and I feel it fits into one of the INFP contradictions, I just can’t think of which one.
its not so much that INFP's dont appreciate facades, more that they dont generally prescribe to the definition of what it is to be "successful" in this society. the INFP is the kid at school who isn't one of the cool kids, but that doesnt matter because they have redefined what cool means according to their personal value system, but that is not to say this is't also partially a defense reaction to an objectively exclusive club like the "cool Kids".
Thank you! As INFP, this is spot on. Is it possible for two INFP to be together? (I currently have strong feelings towards one- and we are so similar) but I've read, that it could get boring. But I don't see that at all, when we are together, it's like fireworks and we could talk about anything under the sun. But will it become boring later on once it becomes a relationship? I have no clue. But I don't see it become that, if both of our personalities are fun, loving, empathetic, creative and experience seeking! I would love to hear any insights on this.
i definitely think it could work. i mean they will understand you, and be up for having interesting/deep conversations unlike some other types that are maybe into small talk. plus as a fellow introvert, i think they'd understand that you need some alone time as they would too. the only downsides i could think of are maybe bottling things up/avoiding conflict with one another, and if INFPs lived together things could be quite messy.
The honeymoon period never lasts in every relationship. The hormones die down and you start to look at each more clearly. That's a good thing. Normal. The Rose coloured glasses come off, and it's time to assess and decide if taking it to the next level is right for the two of you. Even in marriage, these stages happen. Love isn't just love feelings of euphoria, it's about commitment, communication and that you can tolerate the faults and enjoy one another's company. Courtship to marriage comes with stages and milestones. I am very sure of what they are now. For example it takes time to really know and understand someone. This is why many couples seem to marry at the two year or three year mark. if you want to marry, a person dragging it on "putting a ring on it", well it's a bad sign. General advice: don't waste your time languishing, waiting, hoping. As a woman, this is especially important, we have biological clocks. And the older you are, the ones that are marriage material, who make good, loving, long term committed mates, well the pool just keeps getting smaller and smaller. Just sayin' the good ones are getting snatched up. You gotta find them and snatch em up first. someone decent, someone worthy of your Love and devotion, someone you can trust with your life
luna love I neverthought about it... However all the traits that are in an INFP that makes me me are absolutely wonderful. I could marry myself! But I'm also easily distracted, not the most organized, tidy person in the world. Sigh. I don't like that about myself. I did find a person who is a natural fit "The Giver" (jackpot!) and we were this close to marrying, but sometimes there are things that can't be overcome. Apparently there is a similar type, but less other oriented and more efficient. This type of person sounds appealing, but I'm afraid they might be pushy and manipulative.
It’s hard to fight it. If I connect with a girl, get to know her deeper and deeper then it’s over. It’ll result in me liking her, if she’s attractive to me of course
As an INFP , Does anybody else have a problem with getting their driver's license or their car registration renewed or anytime you have to submit to some local jurisdiction or paying bills on time?
What type is James? :) It's so nice to have complementary people who inspire me, but don't make me feel like I'm not good enough to do things (i.e. like critiquing me on how I live my life, or why I have a fear). As an INFP, sometimes I can let fear drive me to not do something, but when I find the right friends or partner, they really encourage me to move forward in life but also make me feel like it's okay to have a fear as long as I don't let it take hold of my dreams.
I am an INFP. I originally began following because I happen to be secretly in love with my best friend who is also an ISFJ. I have found very few resources regarding our compatibility which isn't surprising given how differently we process information and make decisions. One of the articles I read did say that we have the potential to balance each other out very well and that's how I feel my BFF and I would be if I ever got the nerve to tell him. I was just wondering if you or anyone else in the group has any insight on ISFJ and INFP romantic relationships 🤷🏼♀️ Thanks!
I thought I was an infj now I’m thinking I’m an infp and have been married to an isfj for 32 years. It works great. I think balance each other out is exactly right. Good luck!
+clips from films that's really lovely to hear, thank you ❤ absolutely... ENFPs are great 😊 I think you could make any "type" work for you though. We all have very unique strengths and weaknesses. 🔥
INFJ/ENFJ are usually better due to their complementary attributes and also there's more sexual chemistry with these types. The ENFPs or other INFPs are second best usually. ESFJs/ESTPs are also excellent partners for the not-so-demanding INFPs. And usually women INFP can make great couples with a balanced ENTJs. The most important thing to consider if whether you want a partner that is more like you or more different than you. Personally INFJ, ENFJ, ENFPs are my most suitable matches (usually in that order). I would also take into account the enneagram type. For instance a type 4 INFP will not get along well with type 2,3,5,8 even if they are INFJ or ENFP.
Know what attracted me to an INFJ? She said she'd go on a date. Then I found out what an INFJ is and that I'm an INFP. We're friends, and for once it's actually refreshing to hear that from a woman. I suppose because she made me earn it, and I know she means it.
Hey Lex great to see you Both in LOVE that way...... With me IT is ABSOLUTELY THE SAME. If you are AUTHENTIC and SHOW ME YOUR TRUE COLOURS.It Will attract me INSTANTLY. So the wierder the situation. The more IT attracts me......
Hay a conflict if a infp likes a infp and has a emotional attraction and will be thinking about their own feelings and the feelings of the other. And you know you want to be upfront but at the same time you want to be emotional and intellectual honest, and at the the same time whilst you know this person is intuitive you can not judge her actions and responses in the very early stages. And you both dont want to blind side them or put anything heavy on someone you perceive as on the tentative side, I hope being up front that my approach in this the interactions I want should have boundaries (Christian) will give her the strength to be upfront with me if she needs to be with how she is feeling and that she is aware that im not being deceitful in any of my motives and process. (Argh!!!!!!)
I know this is a late comment, but I love your tattoo! I was wondering if YOU loved it? I've been thinking about getting a tattoo for years, but I'm kind of afraid I will hate it five minutes after I get one.
+Ghostbead Hunter no worries at all, thanks for the comment. I adore it!!! 😂 Goku got me through homelessness, well at the least he inspired me to recognise my strength in bad situations. Your concern is absolutely validated ☺ it's pretty permanent alright. What would you get if you had to get one?
I know its cliché. but probably a raven. an old Navajo legend says the raven gave all its color to the world around it, leaving the world beautiful, but the raven was left black as night. I've just always felt a connection with that tale. problem is...lol! that a lot of people in this world don't care as much about the colors people like us can share. or at least it can feel that way. its important to give the best you can though. even if it feels like you get nothing back.
I dislike the whole dating process because it is following a social code to communicate to your partner that you are someone you are not and that you are looking for something you are not. It's like everyone just wants to find something that fits in their gap instead of an actual human being.
You're so right. I have always hated the beginning of the relationship because I always thought how long do I have to wait until I meet the true self of that person.
The truth is that males are indifferent about women having confidence. It is great if a woman can be herself, but women acting all bad ass and confident is not what guys are looking for. It is great if women are confident and are themselves, but even if women aren't confident, that is okay, too. A shy woman can be very attractive. So female INFP's are just fine. It is not a deal breaker for men. On the other hand, INFP males are just plain out of luck. Women prefer confident males. Period. End of story. Introverted males are looked upon as lacking confidence. Confidence is by far the most important thing for a guy to have. Ask any woman on the planet and she will tell you that confidence is the number one thing that her partner has to have. Introversion, feeling, day dreaming, wanting to be good, and idealism are just not traits that make a man look confident. Most women want a bad ass. I just think that INFP males are just S.O.L. If you think I am wrong, let me know. By all means, I would love to hear people's opinion about this.
Raymond Kent thank you for your opinion. I do agree that over-confidence can be off putting, I would call that egotism. I think that looks bad though in anyone, personally. I think you can certainly have confidence and be an idealistic introvert. I think confidence doesn't have to manifest in a macho way, but the ability to be yourself without caring what others think. Kurt Cobain is a good example of an INFP with confidence -- confidence and self acceptance without flaunting it around like it's a product or a trend. He was always true to his authentic self. The one thing I like about introverts is that they feel they don't have to be outwardly expressive to show confidence -' their confidence comes from humbleness, which in many ways, to many people can be a much more desirable trait 😊❤
Thanks, Lex. I hope you are right. I don't think I could ever come across as a bad ass. (Pardon my French) It feels like women want arrogant jerks. Maybe some don't. I hope some don't. I don't think I can ever come across as an arrogant jerk. (I might be a jerk when I am typing stuff but I am softy in person.) But I suppose if arrogance is what women want and arrogance isn't in my nature, then I may never date again. It is what it is. But thanks, for your reply. I hope that introverts can be seen as confident. I guess the key is that they just have to be free from all social anxiety and like you said being comfortable with themselves and being comfortable with their inability to be a social butterfly.
Arrrgh being a traditional "badass" is overrated ;) Some women certainly go for arrogant jerks. I know of a few; and then these women complain that these men treat them badly. Those who get sucked into this culture, you don't really want to associate with them anyway. Your confidence stems not from arrogance and macho-ness, but from knowing your own worth, and not needing the validation of people who are only interested in smokescreens. I mean, there is certainly nothing wrong with people who display their confidence in an extroverted manner, and its ok for people to be attracted to that, but the beauty is, is that we are all different, and there will always be people out there who get who we are and appreciate us the way we are. When I met James, he wasn't the loudest bloke (despite him being ENFP), he also wore his heart on his sleeve. What attracted me to him was that he was unapologetically himself -- that is my favourite kind of confidence and my favourite kind of sexy.
regarding confidence...women like men not because of their confidence thats a side effect of having good looks...replace virtually any quality women say they find attractive with good looks. And if it aint looks its wealth
Not true, skyblaze. At least not completely true. You think people only care about looks because YOU only care about looks. Sigmond Freud thought that SO much of psychology revolved around sex. It doesn't. At least not for everybody. He thought that because his own personal psychology revolved around sex. Men and women are hard wired differently. Anyone telling you anything differently is selling something. Men are interested in 50 % looks and 50 % personality (personality involves extrovertism, social skills, being spunky, being fun to be around, being happy, etc.) Women are interested in 70 % confidence, 10 % looks, 10 % success and ambition, and 10 % sense of humor/personality. Let me guess. You are a male and that is the reason why you think confidence isn't important but looks are. Like I said originally, confidence isn't important to guys and you are a guy.
@@user-lv4ok9vo5o it actually is. i think i can reach a very strong Fi and Fe somehow, even tho i'm an ENFP. and it makes me sad actually, not getting to know the person really and not being with them if i like them. i wouldn't be comfortable having something casual with anyone i actually liked.
1. Be authentic
2. Let us know your intentions
3. Give us time/ space
4. Grasp our uniqueness (" Get us")
5. Inspire us to be the best we can be
Yes, this is exactly true as an infp.. what we needed
Remember that INFP’s can have difficulties to stay in reality, often thinking of the dream relationships and can often end in breakup because they dont feel like the partner ”was the one”.
This is because we are very creative.
Yeah, sometimes I accidently start dreaming about unrealistic dates and situations with my crush. But I try to stop myself from these unhealthy imaginations because I don't want to fall in love with someone who doesn't even exist.
I think that’s why I was won over by an ISTJ. He kept me grounded and balanced me out.
별Stella
I can relate so much to this
someone * breathe*
me : omg i think i'm in love with this person
me
Stranger being polite to me.
INFP me : I found my soulmate.
LOL this si so relatable it hurts :'D
LMAO!!!
haha ! True !
Laughed so hard
lmao this is me
Another thing I'm finding a little too late as an INFP is a need and way to attract me is to be as good of an active listener as I am. Show interest and listen, too. I can listen to someone I'm interested in for ages with deep and genuine gusto. But I'm finding that as a result, I seem to attract takers. People who just want to be listened to, but realy don't reciprocate too much.
Yes!!
This is really huge. We love listening, but also being listened to as well.
Yup I lost interest pretty quick when I tried several ways to guide the guy to ask questions about me but he didn’t. Probably he was another narcissistic person, which apparently I attract. I ghosted him. Did not thought about it twice.😊
He can't take his eyes away from her. 😍
staring at the camera is alkward- Hawthorne Effect is real lol
Yes. Definitely the worst thing. Don't "get" them, put them down, discourage them. THAT is exactly what I grew up with. : ( What is nice about your videos, Lex, is that you show me what is possible. From what I can tell, you were cherished and your family "gets" you. You are the example of what an INFP becomes when understood, loved, and accepted. I have learned how to do this for myself. Love myself. It is going to take a lot of work to get myself right.
In this ever competitive world we literally need someone who let's us be just who we are..
Oh gosh! INFP here! This is sooo true! Ive been in so many dates. Good looking, with facades, not true to themselves, try to get me with their money, rich.....name it. Dating was so hard cause guys wouldnt be able to tell the truth when i asked them straight up what they're looking for! Some will say nothing serious (id tell them i respect that but not for me) then they'll change their mind just to get under my sheets. Luckily im not that stupid.
I got attracted to my boyfiend for being true to himself, open, real, honnest, he's different and owns it. Not pretending to be someone else to fit in.
I'm an ENFP and encouraging or "catalyzing" others comes naturally. It seems really congruent with INFPs who I think need that sometimes. I'm dating an INFP and it's going very well, she finds my vulnerable moments attractive somehow. She also enjoys the encouragement while I enjoy her deep, quirky, spirit.
My sister was typed as an ENFP and it's really fun to chat with her
As long as the ENFP isn’t personality disordered.
@@user-lv4ok9vo5o It turned out she was personality disordered, the INFP. She dumped me, went into therapy right away. I was most frustrated as she revealed she had these issues for a long time, hid them, and then dated fully admitting (though not apologizing) that her own issues caused our breakup and my hurt. I was not impressed.
Matt Blom Thanks for the followup. Oh my, she literally sounded like two different people.
I could relate to all of this. I am highly attracted to every single trait that you mentioned. I yearn for people who inspire me and appreciate me for who I really am. I have a tendancy to talk down on myself too. I am happy for the both of you!
Thank you so much for featuring our track. I loved being in this video xx
Loved it :)
INFP male here. While I have had flings with an ESFJ and an ENFP at one point, the only women who have shown interest in me are generally other INFPs or INTJs. In these cases they happened to be interested in me from the start, and I happened to notice and reciprocate. Maybe it has something to do with sharing Fi and Te? I absolutely hate being the aggressor, and I found dating to be a miserable experience. It might just be because I value authenticity, but I love sexually aggressive women, if only because they tend to put me at ease by making me feel desired. Otherwise, it's just a waste of time trying to woo someone who probably wouldn't be interested in the first place. God knows I've screwed it up enough not to want to try again. Coming off too strong? You bet I did that, and what a terrible mistake it was. The word "creepy" is my least favorite word in the English language, because more people had predicated it to describe than any other. Just chilling and being myself? For a man, that's the equivalent of telling him to do nothing, from which nothing comes.
Now I'm currently in a long term relationship with an INTJ woman whom I met online, and she wanted me long before we ever had the opportunity to meet in person, and even after a devastating setback made that seem impossible. I had no desire for a long distance relationship myself, but we remained friends until our fortunes changed and she moved to my state and seeing her was actually possible. Now in the time elapsed I'd had four flings with various women, which I might not have done had I known better. I had only had one serious relationship prior. During these years, I honestly believed that I had no hope of finding another, and that every sexual opportunity could well have been my last. As for my INTJ woman, she had made up her mind about me four years prior, had no doubt about me the first day we met in person, and has no doubt now as I write this six years later while we live under the same roof. When I asked her about it, still mystified by what God had granted me, she quoted the opening passage of "Their Eyes Were Watching God" by Zora Neale Hurston:
"Ships at a distance have every man’s wish on board. For some they come in with the tide. For others they sail forever on the horizon, never out of sight, never landing until the Watcher turns his eyes away in resignation, his dreams mocked to death by Time. That is the life of men."
"Now, women forget all those things they don’t want to remember and remember everything they don’t want to forget. The dream is the truth. Then they act and do things accordingly."
There's something I'd like to pitch in here. ANY relationship requires acceptance and encouragement of both partners' true selves; if someone feels like they have to go against their identity/strengths all the time, they will inevitably dissociate from the source of that disconnection over time. The reason this point is mentioned so many times for the INFP in particular is that their strengths and qualities are a) very, very rare and b) therefore often undervalued, misunderstood and unappreciated, which is why what would not even be a problem for most other "conventional" types (acceptance of self, fitting in, being appreciated) becomes a VERY major and chronic problem for the INFP, because they feel like no one needs them or values what makes them who they are. No one likes to feel like a worthless cog in the great machine of life - and INFPs feel this pain especially intensely because of how rarely they or their work are liked. Moreover, they are also perfectionists who are very hard on themselves, so they don't give themselves any affirmation to compensate for the lack of external affirmation either. This is why it is so important for their partner to understand them ON THEIR OWN TERMS, to really step into their shoes and understand THEIR values rather than thinking of what society respects or cares for, and encourage that (rest assured, they will receive this full, deep empathetic understanding and encouragement in return). Material prosperity often eludes INFPs, but to be loved for who we are is perhaps the greatest gift we could ever be given (except perhaps a journal, a good book, or some art supplies ;) ).
P.S: Loved the reference to Audioslave's song "Be Yourself" at the end. That song is a classic!
I agree with you 💯! 👍👍👍👍👍
My last relationship caused me to disassociate with myself and it broke me. Now I am in a position that requires a lot of healing and to find myself again.
#2 is the biggest issue right now. I’m so glad you mentioned this. If a man opens a conversation with “hey beautiful” it hits me as an absolute insult. Give me enough respect to allow me to make the best decision for myself by telling me your intentions.
It would be nice for a conversation to open as super casual or something more substantial. Love your videos!
I met this one girl at the gym who hit on me all the time.. I just couldn't trust her
"I like you. What are you going to do with this information?" That's such an INFP thing to say and very indicative of our mind sets. We'll chase to the end of the Earth as long as the other person reciprocates interest. But we won't cross that line until the other party has expressed interest because we have general problems with being manipulators and refuse to play games without clear rules.
Guys, I couldn't relate more to these points. Thank you for this video.
I've been the inspiring and encouraging influence to other people, as an INFP man, and in this way I've cultivated many rewarding and important friendships.
Relationships are another issue, though. At this point in my life, where I've acquired the confidence to just be me, I let people know:
"This is me, quirks and flaws and all. I want you to know I see your unique spark and would like to get to know you better. If you're up for it, let me know. If not, no harm done."
Sometimes they're intimidated by this directness, sometimes they're intrigued, sometimes they're not interested. But at least I've made my intentions clear.
Loved this! I have been married for 25 years and the general points you made certainly ticked the boxes of what attracted me to her. The "vibe" of someone who is quietly confident, driven, authentic, and encouraging/inspirational is just magic. I also appreciated the peek into your relationship, modeling what a healthy one could look like. Good on you guys. Finally I also really loved the little nod to Audioslave at the end. You guys seem like awesome people. Wishing blessings to you both.
One of my good friends is an ENFP and he has romantic feelings for me. I feel the same but being an INFP I have a fear of commitment. Watching this video help me sort out some feelings and I think I would like to try dating him.
I can relate so much! I'm also an INFP, my partner is also an ENFP and we've been together for 4 years. Our passion really connects us and we inspire each other everyday. He feels more grounded because of me and I feel more capable because of him.
💯 agree with this!! Authenticity is necessary. We see right through people’s BS.
I’m an INFP and I went on a date with an INFP about a week ago and we got on soooo well.. ended up spending pretty much the whole week round hers... just wondered what people’s thoughts on the strengths and weaknesses of a relationship between 2 INFPs might be :)
Autistic Wolf I read somewhere that 2 Infoseek will drain each other but who knows? There things are not absolute. It takes 2 people to Tango.
Angelica Trino I can see how that would happen... we’re both pretty intense people... thanks for your reply!
There are so many variables in relationships anything can happen. As for same type relationship issues are having the same type weaknesses and strengths. So don't expect them to happily do all the mundane tasks you dread or have a wide circle of friends to help in situations of need. On the plus side is the intimacy of feeling understood, be careful of there values that don't align with yours you may step on them.
I've had two flings with other INFPs, and while I loved them to death, I can't imagine that either would have worked out well in the long run. We were both weak in the same places.
Ya y can't infps b together, after all birds of same feather flock together....
You have so nailed it. Explains so much about why my last 'experience' just didn't get off the ground. Especially about the honesty, integrity part.
INFP here and these are all spot on
Im a male INFP , unfortunately i can't relate to any of these because i never know how to catch the signal from others. This inner thoughts somehow do overthink over everything.
Not to mention i never ask someone to go in the first place idk why
It's so accurate! These things worked really well for me and my husband in building our relationship.
The most important condition for INFP's to find the right person is to stick to their values and standards no matter how much pressure their close people and society put on them. Sometimes people don't get us but INFP's have a kind of a compass in their heart. It leads them to their true love and harmonious relationships.
Thank you for sharing your thoughts on this matter.
INFP here and this is 💯 accurate ❤️ money doesnt matter to me and most guys I talk to use that to get me, I needed space to contemplate everything and that was the mistake in my past relationships ,they tend to not give me space even if I ask them to and tell me it will make things worst its exhausting when you dont get that space.
I'm an INFP with an ENTP boyfriend, love that Ne open-mindedness and freedom to be weirdos together
I am ENTP with INFP gf
and i can totaly get that
Thanks for the shout love! And thank you two for letting me take care of Oscar! I had such a blast and it was so cool getting to build a friendship with him! This video was adorable and you two are so brave for doing this. I know James was super nervous but I think he did great!
Aww that was some lovely singing at the end. You know what's funny? Your husband looks very much like I pictured him to be going by what you said about him. And then he's here and I see soft eys and think: YES, Lex, well done! You've opened the doors for the right man indeed! And so has he, for this amazing pool of reflection (to the outside and inside. We are mirrors and we function only with polishing, especially when getting in touch with ppl will leave fingerprints all over very very easily XD)
I'm still chuckling over the imagery of the batman onesie. :)))
In my youth, I had a habit of living a relationship in my head before I even getting to know the guy to the point that I was already bored with the thought of them.
Omg I am in my youth and I do that ... When I'm hurt my fantasy partner in my head comes to pick me up and we have a good time, either I console myself with it or I change my mood through this. Do we stop at some point ?
@@madameproblemes6548 At least for me, it was always a form of self protection to imagine how the relationship might be instead of actually being in one. Many people can be selfish and even cruel while pursuing to fulfill their own wants and needs while disregarding how their actions will effect others. To some level we INFPs will always daydream. But if you find your own strength and balance of who you are as well as a partner who loves and accepts your weird ways, the need to have fantasies will subside.
I loved this topic, and especially with combining your 2 different personalities and sharing your own experiences in all its honesty. Real life stuff. Great you incorporated James' music. Added a really nice aspect to this video. Well done Lex
I'd just like to say that as an ENFJ that was with an INFP, I can strongly verify these things are SO TRUE. Just dead on true.
Y'all are just too cute together!!! Many thanks for your honesty & openness - it helped me as I'm sure it has helped others, as well!
Take care & God bless!! 💕
Oh my gosh, you guys are too cute! This totally made my day. Thanks for sharing.
One of my good friends is an infp and her husband is enfp and our relationship is so easy and comfortable. I can go visit and just do my thing without worrying about constantly being together or entertaining each other. I love this family as my own.
Happy Valentine's day too, you lucky two!
It's very hilarious to see a very nervous extrovert sitting beside an apparently stone-cold introvert haha 😂
You are right James, at least in my case I love embracing my INFPness, and also everyone else's.
It's something that from the day you realize it's value and it's uniqueness, you can't ignore whenever it comes across you again 😊.
Have a great time, byyee!
+ST710 Thank you so much. 😂 I'm definitely more in my element in front of a camera. I've gotten a lot better at least. Glad you embrace your own uniqueness... that is the best quality to have. Thanks for your comment xx
Thank you. I'll try to remember these tips as I prepare to get married to an INFP. Much appreciated.
I agree about seeing people being authentic is attractive to an INFP. I will say though that what won me over about my husband is that I felt like I could most be myself (authentic) around him more than others that I had dated.
“I like you! What are you gonna do with this information?!” Hahaha I love it 😂 maybe not THAT literally, but as an INFP I know what you mean. Great video, and you make a super cute couple! Xx
Thank you Lexi and James for your transparency and humility... I and very attracted to an INFP and, being myself an ENFP, I can fully relate to you. This video helped to understand that it's not because I have no news that it means that she's not interested. She needs time and space.
OMG. LOVE when the internet introduces me to things like this. I'm am INFP. Love you and your content!!
Wait, are there people who want to attract INFPs? Why would anyone? Out of pity? At gun point?
That's what I thought when I read the title of the video (and yes, I'm a true INFP)
Wow, that one hit hard! I’m totally with you there!
Wow, thought something very similar when I read the title.
My gf is INFP ... she probably would think the same... but I really love her... you aren't as unlikeable as you think...
i am ENTP & she is the best
Thank you for saying that! Us turbulent INFP's need as much validation as we can get
@@andrewstump6138 she is getting endless validation from me & her reactions are so cute UwU
I am in complete agreement about the authenticity thing. I’ve had guys hit on me at school and it seemed like they were doing it on a dare. Of course I could see through them either they were trying too hard or just being mean. Either way my heart was never broken.
Omg same...!
Basically info girls like honest guys and infp guys like infp girls
This is so me! Haha The part where you were talking about someone being themselves and not scared of showing what they're into is awesome! There was this guy (he's an INTP) I felt in love with. My first reciprocate love. He was very interested about space and that kind of stuff, and he even told me he wanted to be an astronaut. Like, he was so convicted about it, and I even wasn't that type of girl, I mean, a girl that really enjoy space themes but, I just liked that about him! He was just himself and wasn't scared of what people would say about him, and I felt soo like: YES! If that's what you're passionate about, just go for it! I support you! Haha He was smart but it was genuine, he wasn't cocky about it, u know? I just felt in love with him instantly haha (and he felt in love with me too. He told me I was the first person he loved :') ) Too bad it didn't work out :/ I miss him ;-;
I'm an INFP and there's this guy that I like (he's an ENFJ) even though he thinks that I have to stay away from him whenever he's stressed and frustrated from work and says that his heart is cold and all, I'm not scared of him and it makes me want to be there for him. I make him feel that I'm there for him through our communications via messenger since we live a thousand kilometers from each other. We met personally met once and it was new and fine to me.
The other day my mom and guardian found out about us. They made me cut my connection with him, delete pur conversation even demanded me to block him. I don't understand why but I did as I was told since I've been tired of talking back against them. I told him that I have to block him though, I'm honest and still feel bad doing that to him. Before that happened, I remember him giving me a nickname with a
Kpop100M Girl ENFJ is actually suppose to be INFP ideal match. You should go for it.
so what happened?
With the second point, that final comment is so true. I am an INFP, This girl I was talking to I told her how I felt and it backfired
What a lovely video, great ideas and incredible music.
you're such a sweet couple! i wish i knew some ENFPs!
Enfp would never even take the test to know if they are enfp.
True my bf is enfp but insists on intj....im like sure sure bb
I wouldnt date him if he was...lol
@@aviralsinghal1274 totally true kkk
Great video! Currently looking for a guy in a Batman onesie. . . 😎
I heard James talk about the INFP community commenting. And I thought to my self, “I really told to resonate with what Alex expands on but I never want to comment.” I was thinking how funny that was and I feel it fits into one of the INFP contradictions, I just can’t think of which one.
its not so much that INFP's dont appreciate facades, more that they dont generally prescribe to the definition of what it is to be "successful" in this society.
the INFP is the kid at school who isn't one of the cool kids, but that doesnt matter because they have redefined what cool means according to their personal value system, but
that is not to say this is't also partially a defense reaction to an objectively exclusive club like the "cool Kids".
"This is who I am people" love it!
This is excellent, 100% my feelings . Kind of spooky, lol. You guy's are great :)
INFPs cringe really easily, well I do.
I love this. My brother is an infp and this makes alot of since.
Wow. This is so spot on...
And so funny looking down her top 😂
Thank you! As INFP, this is spot on. Is it possible for two INFP to be together? (I currently have strong feelings towards one- and we are so similar) but I've read, that it could get boring. But I don't see that at all, when we are together, it's like fireworks and we could talk about anything under the sun. But will it become boring later on once it becomes a relationship? I have no clue. But I don't see it become that, if both of our personalities are fun, loving, empathetic, creative and experience seeking! I would love to hear any insights on this.
i definitely think it could work. i mean they will understand you, and be up for having interesting/deep conversations unlike some other types that are maybe into small talk. plus as a fellow introvert, i think they'd understand that you need some alone time as they would too. the only downsides i could think of are maybe bottling things up/avoiding conflict with one another, and if INFPs lived together things could be quite messy.
The honeymoon period never lasts in every relationship. The hormones die down and you start to look at each more clearly. That's a good thing. Normal. The Rose coloured glasses come off, and it's time to assess and decide if taking it to the next level is right for the two of you. Even in marriage, these stages happen. Love isn't just love feelings of euphoria, it's about commitment, communication and that you can tolerate the faults and enjoy one another's company. Courtship to marriage comes with stages and milestones. I am very sure of what they are now. For example it takes time to really know and understand someone. This is why many couples seem to marry at the two year or three year mark. if you want to marry, a person dragging it on "putting a ring on it", well it's a bad sign. General advice: don't waste your time languishing, waiting, hoping. As a woman, this is especially important, we have biological clocks. And the older you are, the ones that are marriage material, who make good, loving, long term committed mates, well the pool just keeps getting smaller and smaller. Just sayin' the good ones are getting snatched up. You gotta find them and snatch em up first. someone decent, someone worthy of your Love and devotion, someone you can trust with your life
luna love I neverthought about it... However all the traits that are in an INFP that makes me me are absolutely wonderful. I could marry myself! But I'm also easily distracted, not the most organized, tidy person in the world. Sigh. I don't like that about myself. I did find a person who is a natural fit "The Giver" (jackpot!) and we were this close to marrying, but sometimes there are things that can't be overcome. Apparently there is a similar type, but less other oriented and more efficient. This type of person sounds appealing, but I'm afraid they might be pushy and manipulative.
That is a good video, nice work!
Love your makeup look!
I’m an INFP. I love nature and dancing.
Thanks for your video. Many of the things you said are true in relationship with INFP. I lived it myself with my husband.
American INFP here. Thanks for the vids.I’m enjoying exploring my own notions of New Zealander stereotypes.
INFP, and yes all of these are truee, I just have yet to meet that guy 😀
It’s hard to fight it. If I connect with a girl, get to know her deeper and deeper then it’s over. It’ll result in me liking her, if she’s attractive to me of course
Give me time and space and I'll make the universe out of them
As an INFP , Does anybody else have a problem with getting their driver's license or their car registration renewed or anytime you have to submit to some local jurisdiction or paying bills on time?
Dude
What type is James? :) It's so nice to have complementary people who inspire me, but don't make me feel like I'm not good enough to do things (i.e. like critiquing me on how I live my life, or why I have a fear). As an INFP, sometimes I can let fear drive me to not do something, but when I find the right friends or partner, they really encourage me to move forward in life but also make me feel like it's okay to have a fear as long as I don't let it take hold of my dreams.
He is an ENFP
I am an INFP. I originally began following because I happen to be secretly in love with my best friend who is also an ISFJ.
I have found very few resources regarding our compatibility which isn't surprising given how differently we process information and make decisions.
One of the articles I read did say that we have the potential to balance each other out very well and that's how I feel my BFF and I would be if I ever got the nerve to tell him.
I was just wondering if you or anyone else in the group has any insight on ISFJ and INFP romantic relationships 🤷🏼♀️
Thanks!
I thought I was an infj now I’m thinking I’m an infp and have been married to an isfj for 32 years. It works great. I think balance each other out is exactly right. Good luck!
Your boyfriend lookes like the Vikings boys in my Training team 😊 I trains in Viking fight style. 😁😁😁
You make such a sweet couple......possibly my ideal match (as an INFP) would be ENFP?
+clips from films that's really lovely to hear, thank you ❤ absolutely... ENFPs are great 😊 I think you could make any "type" work for you though. We all have very unique strengths and weaknesses. 🔥
INFJ/ENFJ are usually better due to their complementary attributes and also there's more sexual chemistry with these types. The ENFPs or other INFPs are second best usually. ESFJs/ESTPs are also excellent partners for the not-so-demanding INFPs. And usually women INFP can make great couples with a balanced ENTJs.
The most important thing to consider if whether you want a partner that is more like you or more different than you.
Personally INFJ, ENFJ, ENFPs are my most suitable matches (usually in that order).
I would also take into account the enneagram type. For instance a type 4 INFP will not get along well with type 2,3,5,8 even if they are INFJ or ENFP.
If you ever find an ENFJ you like, absolutely invest in a relationship with them, the mix of personalities is amazing
My childhood friend is ENFP
@@TheRealCristianLuca r there again types in infps ??
Wow this is on point, thank you for videos like this🙏🏼😌
Know what attracted me to an INFJ? She said she'd go on a date. Then I found out what an INFJ is and that I'm an INFP. We're friends, and for once it's actually refreshing to hear that from a woman. I suppose because she made me earn it, and I know she means it.
It's too bad we have such a small percentage of the population. I don't think I even know another INFP. thanks for doing these videos!!!
Thankyou for this tips, now i can appreciate my INFP girlfriend more better :>
Hey Lex great to see you Both in LOVE that way...... With me IT is ABSOLUTELY THE SAME. If you are AUTHENTIC and SHOW ME YOUR TRUE COLOURS.It Will attract me INSTANTLY. So the wierder the situation. The more IT attracts me......
I agree o: Great vid Lexi! You're awesome :)
This is so cute!!!!!! Warmed my heart. 😪❤
Hay a conflict if a infp likes a infp and has a emotional attraction and will be thinking about their own feelings and the feelings of the other. And you know you want to be upfront but at the same time you want to be emotional and intellectual honest, and at the the same time whilst you know this person is intuitive you can not judge her actions and responses in the very early stages. And you both dont want to blind side them or put anything heavy on someone you perceive as on the tentative side, I hope being up front that my approach in this the interactions I want should have boundaries (Christian) will give her the strength to be upfront with me if she needs to be with how she is feeling and that she is aware that im not being deceitful in any of my motives and process. (Argh!!!!!!)
Im an infj, my friend is an infp, the way you talk, the things you say, its him
My lass asked if I wanted to be friends on Facebook. She had me hooked.
What personally type is your husband?? Loved the video! I hope to find that right person one day!
Tawni Winns Im an ENFP 👍😃
I know this is a late comment, but I love your tattoo! I was wondering if YOU loved it? I've been thinking about getting a tattoo for years, but I'm kind of afraid I will hate it five minutes after I get one.
+Ghostbead Hunter no worries at all, thanks for the comment. I adore it!!! 😂 Goku got me through homelessness, well at the least he inspired me to recognise my strength in bad situations. Your concern is absolutely validated ☺ it's pretty permanent alright. What would you get if you had to get one?
I know its cliché. but probably a raven. an old Navajo legend says the raven gave all its color to the world around it, leaving the world beautiful, but the raven was left black as night. I've just always felt a connection with that tale. problem is...lol! that a lot of people in this world don't care as much about the colors people like us can share. or at least it can feel that way. its important to give the best you can though. even if it feels like you get nothing back.
I dislike the whole dating process because it is following a social code to communicate to your partner that you are someone you are not and that you are looking for something you are not. It's like everyone just wants to find something that fits in their gap instead of an actual human being.
You're so right. I have always hated the beginning of the relationship because I always thought how long do I have to wait until I meet the true self of that person.
The truth is that males are indifferent about women having confidence. It is great if a woman can be herself, but women acting all bad ass and confident is not what guys are looking for. It is great if women are confident and are themselves, but even if women aren't confident, that is okay, too. A shy woman can be very attractive. So female INFP's are just fine. It is not a deal breaker for men.
On the other hand, INFP males are just plain out of luck. Women prefer confident males. Period. End of story. Introverted males are looked upon as lacking confidence. Confidence is by far the most important thing for a guy to have. Ask any woman on the planet and she will tell you that confidence is the number one thing that her partner has to have.
Introversion, feeling, day dreaming, wanting to be good, and idealism are just not traits that make a man look confident. Most women want a bad ass.
I just think that INFP males are just S.O.L.
If you think I am wrong, let me know. By all means, I would love to hear people's opinion about this.
Raymond Kent thank you for your opinion. I do agree that over-confidence can be off putting, I would call that egotism. I think that looks bad though in anyone, personally. I think you can certainly have confidence and be an idealistic introvert. I think confidence doesn't have to manifest in a macho way, but the ability to be yourself without caring what others think. Kurt Cobain is a good example of an INFP with confidence -- confidence and self acceptance without flaunting it around like it's a product or a trend. He was always true to his authentic self.
The one thing I like about introverts is that they feel they don't have to be outwardly expressive to show confidence -' their confidence comes from humbleness, which in many ways, to many people can be a much more desirable trait 😊❤
Thanks, Lex. I hope you are right. I don't think I could ever come across as a bad ass. (Pardon my French) It feels like women want arrogant jerks. Maybe some don't. I hope some don't. I don't think I can ever come across as an arrogant jerk. (I might be a jerk when I am typing stuff but I am softy in person.)
But I suppose if arrogance is what women want and arrogance isn't in my nature, then I may never date again. It is what it is.
But thanks, for your reply. I hope that introverts can be seen as confident. I guess the key is that they just have to be free from all social anxiety and like you said being comfortable with themselves and being comfortable with their inability to be a social butterfly.
Arrrgh being a traditional "badass" is overrated ;)
Some women certainly go for arrogant jerks. I know of a few; and then these women complain that these men treat them badly. Those who get sucked into this culture, you don't really want to associate with them anyway. Your confidence stems not from arrogance and macho-ness, but from knowing your own worth, and not needing the validation of people who are only interested in smokescreens. I mean, there is certainly nothing wrong with people who display their confidence in an extroverted manner, and its ok for people to be attracted to that, but the beauty is, is that we are all different, and there will always be people out there who get who we are and appreciate us the way we are. When I met James, he wasn't the loudest bloke (despite him being ENFP), he also wore his heart on his sleeve. What attracted me to him was that he was unapologetically himself -- that is my favourite kind of confidence and my favourite kind of sexy.
regarding confidence...women like men not because of their confidence thats a side effect of having good looks...replace virtually any quality women say they find attractive with good looks. And if it aint looks its wealth
Not true, skyblaze. At least not completely true. You think people only care about looks because YOU only care about looks.
Sigmond Freud thought that SO much of psychology revolved around sex. It doesn't. At least not for everybody. He thought that because his own personal psychology revolved around sex.
Men and women are hard wired differently. Anyone telling you anything differently is selling something.
Men are interested in 50 % looks and 50 % personality (personality involves extrovertism, social skills, being spunky, being fun to be around, being happy, etc.)
Women are interested in 70 % confidence, 10 % looks, 10 % success and ambition, and 10 % sense of humor/personality.
Let me guess. You are a male and that is the reason why you think confidence isn't important but looks are.
Like I said originally, confidence isn't important to guys and you are a guy.
you guys are so cute im in love
What is James in terms of MBTI type?
ENFPs prefer quick nonserious noncommittal relationships, right?
Hippies 😂
not all of them. i'm one and i don't like it.
@@ninaportoc that’s so interesting how that is.
@@user-lv4ok9vo5o it actually is. i think i can reach a very strong Fi and Fe somehow, even tho i'm an ENFP. and it makes me sad actually, not getting to know the person really and not being with them if i like them. i wouldn't be comfortable having something casual with anyone i actually liked.
@@ninaportoc That’s how it should be. I don’t respect anyone less.
i think both of you are very good for each other :)
I think I was in relationship with 18 people in my head
So beautiful inside-out :)
INFP here and this is so true!
I love the Goku drawing in the background
When do we know INFPs are done with their time and space?
15:45 Damn, now I cannot listen to her anymore because I am just watching his eyes. ^^
Haha I honestly didnt know where to look half the time!
What lipstick are you wearing?
This is so beautifully true
Sorry maybe you already mention it somewhere but what is hes personality type?
3:45 Agnieszka Chylinska's laugh ^^