Thank you to Aura for supporting me on my journey of wellbeing & sleep! Get started with Aura today for free & the first 500 people to use my link will also get 25% off+ free trial to the Aura membership: www.aurahealth.io/notevenemily
It's especially bad on tiktok because a lot of younger kids use that app, and since they're not done growing and may be going through a sort of 'ugly middle school phase', it probably will make them really insecure, or they'll start hating their own bodies. It's horrible for anyone to feel that way, but especially kids
As a kid (12), it really is horrible. I'm doing better than I was last year, and I never had an ed, but I felt horrible about my self and I don't I even know what happened to make me feel better but all I know is I'm terrified of feeling that way again.
I’m 13 and right now i’m doing pretty okay, but the last couple of years I was STRUGGLING. Nearly developed an ed, hated how I looked with a passion, feeling depressed all the time and having a lot of really heavy OCD symptoms. Most of that has gone away now but I remember in 2020 and 2021 feelings of depression and ocd symptoms were very intense for me. (not self diagnosing, just observations.)
It’s even more dangerous when these influencers use face and body filters and deny using them. The fact we can use body filters on videos and lie about how tiny our waist is… crazy and manipulative to naive viewers
reminds me of that one girl on tiktok who did cosplays and would always use a body filter to slim down her waist to ridiculous sizes and make herself look 'slim thicc' to the point where it no longer looked realistic, and when people pointed it out she would deny using a filter.. honestly such a scummy thing to do especially on a platform where the audience mostly consists of young people/teenagers :(
umm i don’t think that’s the problem at hand😭 the fact that the filters are even there, pushes the idea that we need them. obviously that’s not the case, but it’s just another form of profiting off of people’s insecurities.
bro i fucking love your transitions into ads also the number of nose trends on tiktok infuriate me bc they border on racism and antisemitism bc it was always people with slim button noses and high nosebridge being reassured that their nose is indeed in the beauty norm while those of us with bigger or smaller noses are just like 🧍🏽♀️🧍🏽♀️ oke what am i then
i used to think my nose was big because of that, but now i can tell my nose is super average size. screw you beauty standards for noses, why should i care about someone's nose it's literally what they use to breathe.
i read a Tumblr post recently that was like "if you're uncomfortable with your art because it looks like you made it it'll never be good enough" and I think that applies to self-image too. if you try to look like another person it'll never be enough. anyway enough deep shit be anti-capitalist like the other person said
The nose trend is especially fucked up and regressive because it favors button noses and shorter noses in general which is /absolutely/ racist towards ethnic groups with that type of predisposition
yeah I think we need to impliment something into the education systems that points out eurocentric beauty standards and how it factors into white supremacy. We need to teach people that every variation of attributes have beauty
not only that but only toddlers have short, """""pretty""""", button noses...our adult nose is the nose we have during our teenage years and will not change after age 14. when an adult has a button nose, its USUALLY actually an upturned nose
I always feel like I'm the only straight guy, or guy in general who watches your content. And I've never cared, keep fighting the system em- I mean...not Emily
I have always hated tik tok since it first got renamed and rebranded for a western audience and everyone said I was being silly to rule out tik tok as the worst of the worst, yet with every passing day I am vindicated more and more with proof that tik tok is literally the WORST of the WORST
yup there's a reason I never used tiktok. If I want self confidence issues I just go on instagram. I don't need multiple apps telling me how ugly I look-- 1 is enough lmfao
@@burnt.norton They said rule out tik tok as the worst of the worst. Meaning they’re excluding it from being worst of the worst. I know what it means, I was asking them just in case they had a different understanding of the phrase.
I love the way, that she just starts every video with: "Hello everyone, my name is Emily as you may or may not know and today we're going to be talking about..."
Does anyone remember that website that analyzed a picture of your face and gave you a percentage of how close to "perfection" you were? I remember all my friends getting high scores in their memey pictures and I sat there staring at my 10% I cannot tell you how miserable I felt
don't let others tell you your beauty. don't let robots of all tell you about your beauty. In the right eyes you are to die for and in the wrong eyes you aren't, but you're still hella worth it irl
yes! not to mention beauty standards are often eurocentric, and don't tend to look kindly on people with certain disabilities, of certain body shapes/sizes, ages, etc.
as a recovering anorexic, this is just. so true. like, not to shame people with conventionally skinny bodies, but when society acts like they are the norm, and beyond that, the end all be all of human appearance it gets into icky territory really quick. its like psychologically dangerous for anyone (but especially children) to be exposed to this stuff too, which in my opinion just makes it so much grosser for the app itself to be promoting this stuff. people forget that its not only diet culture that kills, the "hollywood effect" (which there is some fabulous academic literature on) kills too. social media just gives us the hollywood effect available 24/7, on demand, no questions asked.
It's really bad for gender dysphoria as well, I put a feminine filter on myself on Snapchat and my heart just sank.. How badly I still want to look like that!
"Wanting to keep the uggos down." So many people try to keep the ugly, or the poor, or whatever group down just as a way of trying to prove they are not part of that group. There is some irrational belief that if you set yourself in opposition to the bad group then the good group will accept you and you will effectively be one of the good ones.
ok ok you mentioned having a square-shaped face, but honestly I've always *loved* that. I think you look so beautiful with that face shape, and it's helped me feel more secure about my face shape that's pretty similar
same here, i’m chinese and i’ve always struggled with it coz most asian people you see online and stuff have the super angular face and the big eyes-obviously only a filter or cosmetic surgery (or they got lucky with genetics) but it still really got me down when i was younger. it’s nice to see people like me.
Same here. I cycle between liking and disliking my very square face, which is odd because I find a lot of other people that have them to be quite attractive.
It is a joke and also shows that we consider more stuff that appearance in attraction. Even if he is a model if is rude to waitress etc to me he unattractive.
Honestly, the people who are knowingly uplifting their beauty through putting other people down are just monsters. I’m sick of seeing the White and skinny girls on social media brag about having the “clean girl” look, do that stupid belt trend to brag about how small their waist is, brag about their “flawless” face etc. Like Emily said, there is a huge difference between self love/appreciation and using the toxicity of beauty standards to benefit yourself despite the harm you are causing to girls who already feel insecure.
I hate filters because people always use the stupid “silly” filters to make me look ugly and then the next second they take a really nice selfie of themselves, I’m just like gee thanks
the fact that i deleted social media except for ytb for my mental health but still got my mental health destroyed because the camera app’s default setting inverts your face 💀
i deleted tiktok on my phone and never rly have it there unless i want to post ,.,, it does significant amounts of damage for me LOL rly glad more ppl are talking abt this thank u emily
Everyday my hatred for TikTok becomes more valid. I’ve also noticed that ever since we as a society used social media (especially TikTok), the body trends are changing at a faster rate. It’s like our bodies are becoming fast fashion…
"I love tiktok I can make random strangers jealous of me by just showing them what I want to show them with multiple filters and layers of makeup" is what I would say if I can make ppl jealous
You just keep chipping away at society's flaws hopefully it reaches, because this whole video is something that I think everyone should be reminded of we are still human and we all look the way we do and that's okay, normal. Thanks Emily
I’m incredibly insecure about my body and every now and then I spend hours in front of my mirror nitpicking and criticizing my body until I make myself cry. You know as one does. But I sometimes have to take breaks from TikTok cause I’ll see all these women with amazing bodies that I wish I had and it ends up making me feel worse about myself.
Replace the nitpicking with kindness, even if it feels really forced. Stand in the mirror and point out all of the things you LIKE about your body. If that's difficult, start with things that aren't aesthetic like "I like that (insert part) functions properly, and it is good for that"
the way that social media sets the standard of modern beauty as being so precise that we all practically have to look the same, or we're inherently ugly, is just so gross. i try to stay away from that way of thinking and social media in general, but it's dangerous to be around so many people who don't even question where they get their beauty standards from is just...scary. something to definitely protect ourselves from. i say this as someone who just moved in with 2 people who literally get their ideas of beauty from tiktok and once i realized it started to rub off on me, i was like, hey, literally this isn't okay. this isn't me.
this is good timing, in the wake of people slamming that NBA player for being ‘ugly’. and is it just me, or is it the people who love promoting ‘self-love’ who’ll then go out and be the most judgmental mfs?
Emily’s portrayal as a mom doing the Renegade gave me more laughs than normal to the point it’ll be living in my head rent-free for the next week. Thank you.
You have one of the prettiest faces I've ever seen, Emily. Seriously, you could be a Disney Princess with a face like that! And thank you for making this video! You just so happened to post this on my birthday! You're awesome! Thank you!
I remember when I was 13, I literally ate 1 slice of an apple for 6 months while exercising for 2 hours a day because TikTok pointed out hip dips. I deleted it in August and I feel sooo much better with myself lol.
@@katgreer6113 I am pretty sure there is science behind it, I think there is even a term but I cant quite recall it (google it, I believe it is called herd mentality lol)
Every day I thank my country India for banning TikTok, it’s been like three years now. I know Ig reels and yt shorts still work here but they are way less toxic than what I remember TikTok was.
also the trend where people put on an ‘ugly’ nose then showed off their ‘pretty’ nose was antisemitic. they took a stereotypical ‘jewish nose’ and then showed off typically white features. not enough people talk about this issue so i liked when you used examples of it in this video edited to fix an incorrect term
Funny thing when I saw that trend of people making their lips small and then showing off their big lips was offensive and I thought they'd never do the same thing with nose but apparently I was wrong, wow some people seriously have no empathy, and yes it's stereotypically jewish but there's plenty of ethnicities were the hooked nose is common... Very slimy behavior when people do these trends
@@marnenotmarnie259 a lot of these people who do these trends actually have plastic surgeries and fillers though so in reality they hate how they genetically look and there's a rather large possibility they'll pass it on to their kids
The one trend i hate the most recently is "l only date tall guys" trend... the conversation about female beauty standards is loud and getting louder and this is a good thing, but in the meantime shorter men, that most of the time are just average height, get cyber bullied and talked down to with the messages like "no girL Will ever date you if you are shorter than 180" and i rarely see that being addressed
This is why I can’t have tik tok or instagram. Instagram made me so depressed because I kept comparing myself to other people and this was happening at 11 years old. I’m 22 now and I can’t even imagine what it’s like for 9 year old girls to see these things. I think it’s incredibly sad that there is only one beauty standard being pushed when so many things make people beautiful. It’s actually quite beautiful for humans to look different and have unique attributes.
I uninstalled tiktok a few months ago, and finally deleted my profile a month or so after that, and my quality of life has improved drastically. After tiktok went, I then deleted my twitter, then my facebook, leaving only my instagram so my grandma and wayward friends can catch glimpses of what i am up to when I do my 1 post a year. The time, money, and joy of life I now find myself with have helped me deal with my own mental illnesses. I love the art I make, I love the friends and family I have in my life and I feel so much more present for all of it. We all need to learn a lot less about each other.
I often used to compare myself to these conventionally attractive people thinking it is something I could achieve if I just did x and y, but I've realised I can't ever become like them. I'm not conventionally attractive, and it is okay. I am working on fixing what social media broke in me, and I've come a long way. I still wish to change things about myself, but only because I want to be healthy and have a sound mind, not because I want to look like someone else anymore. I have accepted the fact that I will probably never find a romantic partner because of the way I look, so if it happens I'll be positively suprised, but if it doesn't that's okay too. TikTok is the worst platform I've been on that promotes these unhealthy standards (I never was on tumblr so idk how it was there), but it's so addicting that I can't stop using it lol. Anyways, loved the video, I'm glad someone is talking about these insane trends.
i think this was why i stopped being on the side of tiktok that wasn't dedicated to fandoms because normal tiktok is just 10 different shades of the same body check trends. i felt ugly a lot growing up but now that it's finally starting to mellow out, i think i just pity anyone who seriously wants to keep fitting the ideal of this make believe person that tiktok is pushing when i was a kid i remember feeling so ugly compared to everyone else, but the reality was that i looked like a kid and not an adult or even an older teen. i'm asian and so i looked several years younger than how i really was. i think the time i felt the ugliest was in 8th grade and almost everyone around me looked 15-16 and i looked like i was 12 even though we were all supposed to be 13 going on 14. i look back and dude i looked my age. it wasn't my fault everyone around me was starting to age like milk. i was just 13 why did i expect to look 16? now that i'm 18 and everyone my age is looking 22-25, it's finally around that time that i want to look younger, but when i was a kid i just felt so out of place that it feels weird now that it's desirable. because before it felt like i was feeling like i had to forever play catch up with the people i grew up with and that it wouldn't stop until we were middle aged and started to level out our growth changes
It really sucks how social media has made us compare ourselves to others, where we should love ourselves for who we are 😢 Also your content is really entertaining, Emily 😊
Omg I remember the thinspo phase on tumblr and now I feel like I’m seeing it more and more on TikTok now too. I don’t want that to come back because I developed and ED.
its okay to not love your body or the way you look sometimes and thats why i like the idea of body neutrality. its like body positivity, but acknowledging that we wont always feel good about ourselves, and we can still feel that way without making ourselves feel like shit ~idk if that made sense
I've never really understood why people follow influencers just because of how attractive they are? Like personally if I find someone's content interesting I'm going to be thinking about what they're talking about rather than how much more attractive they are than me, and if I don't find their content interesting I'm not going to stick around just to ogle them? Idk if that's just me
Same. I mean i like looking at pretty people, but i only really follow someone if i like what they *do*. I'll follow anyone if they have entertaining content, wether i find them attractive or not.
I‘ve tried explaining to my best friend why I dont like seeing hot dudes on Ig or why I dont like face filters but it was kinda hard to explain tbh and she didn’t rly understand it but now I sent her that vid and u made everything so clear and made so many good points haha thanks for that I love ur vids sm man😭
half of my fyp is beautytok and its fun seeing attractive people doing makeup/hair but it gets depressing bc i know if i used the exact products it will not even be as close to that flawless as them
god that nose trend is particularly vile! i know so many people with hooked noses including members of my own family who feel selfconscious about their features, and for people to insinuate that they're "ugly" makes my blood boil. it's also got some downright horrible antisemetic undertones to boot. yikes all around.
I never downloaded tik tok because I didn't want to had a relapse on my ED, just watch the reels a month later on Instagram, it's the same thing without the risk, specially because beauty filters on IG suck lmao I always look so bad, like a child did my make up
Genuinely, I think the best decision I've ever made was getting rid of social media at the beginning of high school, because in my first year of College, I'm just now coming to terms with a lot of my self-esteem issues. I can't imagine how behind on that progress I would be if I'd spent the last four years of my life scrolling through millions of photos/videos of attractive women and partaking in these kinds of trends.
i can't express how my hatred for tiktok has grown over the years because of things like this, though i still have the app and post silly little edits of my silly little biases so im still contradicting myself
THANK YOU for talking about the ridiculousness of these filters and tiktok trends that are designed to make us feel like we need to change our faces and bodies -- especially promoting white features. I find myself resenting every creator that feeds into these trends, or those who sneakily use filters that make their skin look perfect/bodies look more snatched without letting their audience know that it's not real.
I firmly believe many of these beauty micro influencers thrive off of other peoples' insecurities and create new insecurities for others to feel bad about, while they are praised for having the "perfect" face
Not only that but they’re also often being sponsored by beauty companies, so their influenced audience with an already low self esteem will flock to buy the super expensive products, giving those influencers more profits. It’s so sad.
I think what helps me with my own confidence is to recognize that other people probably want traits that I possess. I am insecure about my weak jawline as a man, but i wouldn't want it to be super pronounced either.
Yeah. I miss when My only way to feed My insecurities were hot celebs. Now plebs like I try to and somewhat succeed too? Unforgivable! All jokes aside, it truly is scaaary how tiktok's become this way.
the worst videos are the ones where people post hot people (like their waiter or someone waiting at an airport) like “OMG he’s so fine”. it just makes me think about the fact that nobody would ever see me and post me with that caption. no matter how attractive i feel, i will never be that guy you can record and post and have people in the comments say they ship us two or talk about how attractive i am.
@@n48_art agreed it’s not something i desire either way. being attractive or unattractive both have their downsides. me personally i would prefer the downsides of being attractive but 😗🤷♀️
it's crazy, cus here in my country there's countless news of people going to plastic surgeons with a picture of them on a filter and just saying "make me look like this" so....wtf
I’ve forced myself to not use filters so I just get exposure therapy to my insecurities bc omfg when I caught myself over analyzing my features and comparing myself to others I was like “oh no it’s the brain rot”
Omg when you were talking about how you were overly confident because you felt unlovable that makes so MUCH sense, I was having that same internal struggle LOL, I’m working on it everyday but thanks for putting that into words for me
honestly social media has just ruined me. the fact i already kinda hated my self recently and up a grade and school and the age where i should start dating, just ruined me. seeing girls id date and look good constantly, and knowing their dating, especially no one like me and way better looking than me, it just makes me worse and makes me feel i have 0 chance with the girl i like and why i even try and like her.
deleting tiktok was one of the best decisions ive made so far. Its also helping me regain a sense of humor. The "humor" on that app has become so extremely sad. Dont get me wrong there are plenty of funny videos. But like theres some stuff that once u get rid if the app and ppl try to quote things ur like.... huh
This genuinely means so much to me. When I was younger I used to be super confident and happy with myself, but as I grew older and started spending a lot of time on social media, I did not only lose almost every trace of confidence and grew insanely insecure, but also experienced the overwhelming pressure of trying to fit into the beauty standard. There were times where I genuinely avoided looking in the mirror or give myself the tiniest compliment about my looks in front of other people because I was so sure that there was nothing attractive about me. I developed major body dysmorphia and started working out excessively to a point where I based all of my self confidence on the amount of abs I had or how clean my skin was. I still struggle with it sometimes, but I have definitely grown and learned a lot about what was shown on the internet and what was Reality and how I had to stop comparing myself to others and focus on loving me for who I am instead. So I love whenever that issue is addressed, because I believe that it is a thing that is affecting almost everyone in this generation and it feels good to get a reality check sometimes. Sorry for the tmi, but I just wanted to get that out there, I’m usually a silent watcher and rarely comment, but I appreciate this a lot!
Honestly, as someone assigned male at birth who desperately wants to look more feminine, I’ve realized the absolutely insane level of difference between how much appearance is valued by society for each gender. I honestly Never cared about my appearance until pretty recently, when I started to want to look more “feminine”.
This in-depth review was needed! I havent used. A single filter but i have seen how much it modifies your face. The effect on our psyche is tremendously negative.
I stopped using mine and I feel fine about it. I’m tired of being fed botox commercials and plastic surgeons saying what I would need to “perfect” my face and body
These skits are hilarious! I've been controlling my use of social media for a while, and Tiktok is something I refused to regularly use from the start. I'd open it, post a video, and leave. I deleted my account there a few weeks ago, as I've started perceiving it as just a waste of time. Anyways, ever since I stopped using the internet as often these ways of thinking (and many other aspects of society) just feel like a different world to me. I'm just chilling in my corner, I recommend it.
Even though im a Stereotypical Generation Z tiktok has always been too intense for me lol. Its even weirder when ur trans, so all body stuff is not only a way to make you feel weird and dysphoric about your transition, but is sometimes treated as inherently political(also a lot of popular trans activism on tiktok- at least when I had it- was kinda??? tranphobic??? lmao)
I remember how tiktok effected me that even my sister told me to delete it, I already have low self esteem but that fcking app made it even worse, thankfully i don’t use it anymore but only to see my faves edit or for memes
Thank you to Aura for supporting me on my journey of wellbeing & sleep! Get started with Aura today for free & the first 500 people to use my link will also get 25% off+ free trial to the Aura membership: www.aurahealth.io/notevenemily
Yass
"In a society that profits from your insecurity, liking yourself is an act of rebellion." - Caroline Caldwell
And THAT’S how I fixed my low self esteem
Ayt I'm rebelling, this is the quote that got me
Being okay with your body and face is a form of anticapitalism more than a form of self love. Easier to internalize.
omg i’ve never really thought about it like that but ur right
yo this is such a good way to think of it eye opening on god
This is my new life motto
very well put
thank u for this 😽
It's especially bad on tiktok because a lot of younger kids use that app, and since they're not done growing and may be going through a sort of 'ugly middle school phase', it probably will make them really insecure, or they'll start hating their own bodies. It's horrible for anyone to feel that way, but especially kids
Then let’s maybe not give younger kids phones.
@@taylermuilenburg5029 honestly ure right, but even on their parent's phones (if they watch tiktok there) they'll see stuff like this too.
As a kid (12), it really is horrible. I'm doing better than I was last year, and I never had an ed, but I felt horrible about my self and I don't I even know what happened to make me feel better but all I know is I'm terrified of feeling that way again.
I’m 13 and right now i’m doing pretty okay, but the last couple of years I was STRUGGLING. Nearly developed an ed, hated how I looked with a passion, feeling depressed all the time and having a lot of really heavy OCD symptoms. Most of that has gone away now but I remember in 2020 and 2021 feelings of depression and ocd symptoms were very intense for me. (not self diagnosing, just observations.)
god i hope i'm in my ugly middle schooler phase rn 💀
It’s even more dangerous when these influencers use face and body filters and deny using them. The fact we can use body filters on videos and lie about how tiny our waist is… crazy and manipulative to naive viewers
reminds me of that one girl on tiktok who did cosplays and would always use a body filter to slim down her waist to ridiculous sizes and make herself look 'slim thicc' to the point where it no longer looked realistic, and when people pointed it out she would deny using a filter.. honestly such a scummy thing to do especially on a platform where the audience mostly consists of young people/teenagers :(
does tiktok still do that thing where there's an automatic filter when you film on the app that you can't turn off?
umm i don’t think that’s the problem at hand😭 the fact that the filters are even there, pushes the idea that we need them. obviously that’s not the case, but it’s just another form of profiting off of people’s insecurities.
bro i fucking love your transitions into ads
also the number of nose trends on tiktok infuriate me bc they border on racism and antisemitism bc it was always people with slim button noses and high nosebridge being reassured that their nose is indeed in the beauty norm while those of us with bigger or smaller noses are just like 🧍🏽♀️🧍🏽♀️ oke what am i then
exactly !!
i used to think my nose was big because of that, but now i can tell my nose is super average size. screw you beauty standards for noses, why should i care about someone's nose it's literally what they use to breathe.
I feel you there. Got a bridge bump and it infuriated me even before these people felt the need to point it out.
exactly! absolutely bullshit who cares if your NOSE POINTS UP OR DOWN!
The nose trends make me feel the worst
i read a Tumblr post recently that was like "if you're uncomfortable with your art because it looks like you made it it'll never be good enough" and I think that applies to self-image too. if you try to look like another person it'll never be enough. anyway enough deep shit be anti-capitalist like the other person said
The nose trend is especially fucked up and regressive because it favors button noses and shorter noses in general which is /absolutely/ racist towards ethnic groups with that type of predisposition
Large noses can look great - the filter distorts the face around the nose which makes the tiktokers look ugly
yeah I think we need to impliment something into the education systems that points out eurocentric beauty standards and how it factors into white supremacy. We need to teach people that every variation of attributes have beauty
ikr, it's giving eugenics vibes, huge no.
@@nym5qu17Fr like evrey human is diverse and beautiful in their own ways
not only that but only toddlers have short, """""pretty""""", button noses...our adult nose is the nose we have during our teenage years and will not change after age 14. when an adult has a button nose, its USUALLY actually an upturned nose
I always feel like I'm the only straight guy, or guy in general who watches your content. And I've never cared, keep fighting the system em- I mean...not Emily
LOL well i do have a 20% male audience but idk how many of them are straight, thanks for being the straight male representation in my audience hahaha
Straight guys assemble!
Here!
@@notevenemily ua-cam.com/video/W171n_v4ZAs/v-deo.html
Edit: I realize now no one is gonna click this link. But it's SWM by Bo Burnham
Another guy here but bi. Also enjoy watching your content
I have always hated tik tok since it first got renamed and rebranded for a western audience and everyone said I was being silly to rule out tik tok as the worst of the worst, yet with every passing day I am vindicated more and more with proof that tik tok is literally the WORST of the WORST
Rule it out? Doesn’t that mean you think it’s not the worst?
yup there's a reason I never used tiktok. If I want self confidence issues I just go on instagram. I don't need multiple apps telling me how ugly I look-- 1 is enough lmfao
@@oddpickle “rule out” is commonly used to express that you’re excluding something? this person is excluding titkok..
@@burnt.norton They said rule out tik tok as the worst of the worst. Meaning they’re excluding it from being worst of the worst. I know what it means, I was asking them just in case they had a different understanding of the phrase.
Congratulations
Don’t forget that TikTok used to have an algorithm in place that sent videos by “ugly” people to less people’s for you pages
Used to?
@@nothing-jl2dzYeah did they get rid of that?? I’d be surprised if they did but it’d be nice, I guess
now they just send you vids you like
@@Aeiouaaaaaaaaa Tiktok says they got rid of it, but I don’t know
@@mirror1643 I don’t only like videos of pretty people so not really
I love the way, that she just starts every video with: "Hello everyone, my name is Emily as you may or may not know and today we're going to be talking about..."
consistency is key
Too bad she's not even Emily. The intro would have made more sense if she was🤷🏾♂️
Does anyone remember that website that analyzed a picture of your face and gave you a percentage of how close to "perfection" you were? I remember all my friends getting high scores in their memey pictures and I sat there staring at my 10% I cannot tell you how miserable I felt
Camera lens distort your face
don't let others tell you your beauty. don't let robots of all tell you about your beauty. In the right eyes you are to die for and in the wrong eyes you aren't, but you're still hella worth it irl
The chokehold those sites had on me! They were total bs but they were sciencey enough to convince loads of insecure young people
OH MY GOD I REMMEBERR THAT i did that a few years ago
It’s just a random number
yes! not to mention beauty standards are often eurocentric, and don't tend to look kindly on people with certain disabilities, of certain body shapes/sizes, ages, etc.
Disabilities? I think the age part is funny because none of us are into old ladies
@@thecoolannishatk. maybe old men are?
as a recovering anorexic, this is just. so true. like, not to shame people with conventionally skinny bodies, but when society acts like they are the norm, and beyond that, the end all be all of human appearance it gets into icky territory really quick. its like psychologically dangerous for anyone (but especially children) to be exposed to this stuff too, which in my opinion just makes it so much grosser for the app itself to be promoting this stuff. people forget that its not only diet culture that kills, the "hollywood effect" (which there is some fabulous academic literature on) kills too. social media just gives us the hollywood effect available 24/7, on demand, no questions asked.
It's really bad for gender dysphoria as well, I put a feminine filter on myself on Snapchat and my heart just sank.. How badly I still want to look like that!
Its the opposite for me, all the filters give me more feminine features and it makes my dysphoria soooooooooo bad
@@tylerthompson7461 yeah dude it’s like I put on a filter and suddenly I don’t pass at all.
You guys need therapy not surgery
@@huskylluvryou do realize this is a public platform in which if you say something it makes it everyone’s business right?
@@NadiaSeesItI'm getting both and all my therapists have approved
"Wanting to keep the uggos down." So many people try to keep the ugly, or the poor, or whatever group down just as a way of trying to prove they are not part of that group. There is some irrational belief that if you set yourself in opposition to the bad group then the good group will accept you and you will effectively be one of the good ones.
ok ok you mentioned having a square-shaped face, but honestly I've always *loved* that. I think you look so beautiful with that face shape, and it's helped me feel more secure about my face shape that's pretty similar
same here, i’m chinese and i’ve always struggled with it coz most asian people you see online and stuff have the super angular face and the big eyes-obviously only a filter or cosmetic surgery (or they got lucky with genetics) but it still really got me down when i was younger. it’s nice to see people like me.
Same here. I cycle between liking and disliking my very square face, which is odd because I find a lot of other people that have them to be quite attractive.
"He's a 10 but..." SHUT UP. I AM SO DONE WITH PEOPLE AND TIKTOK D= You either find them attractive, or you don't. This whole scale bs ain't it.
I saw one that was like "he's a 10 but he has an Android so now hes a 2" like??? Bestie its a phone????? Literally who cares?????
@@depressinggen k ,think its a ioke...i
@@katgreer6113 ioke
It is a joke and also shows that we consider more stuff that appearance in attraction. Even if he is a model if is rude to waitress etc to me he unattractive.
that one isn’t about appearance tho it’s about personality
Honestly, the people who are knowingly uplifting their beauty through putting other people down are just monsters. I’m sick of seeing the White and skinny girls on social media brag about having the “clean girl” look, do that stupid belt trend to brag about how small their waist is, brag about their “flawless” face etc. Like Emily said, there is a huge difference between self love/appreciation and using the toxicity of beauty standards to benefit yourself despite the harm you are causing to girls who already feel insecure.
I hate filters because people always use the stupid “silly” filters to make me look ugly and then the next second they take a really nice selfie of themselves, I’m just like gee thanks
the fact that i deleted social media except for ytb for my mental health but still got my mental health destroyed because the camera app’s default setting inverts your face 💀
i deleted tiktok on my phone and never rly have it there unless i want to post ,.,, it does significant amounts of damage for me LOL
rly glad more ppl are talking abt this thank u emily
yeah I've done the same , it makes my overthinking crazy lol
Everyday my hatred for TikTok becomes more valid. I’ve also noticed that ever since we as a society used social media (especially TikTok), the body trends are changing at a faster rate. It’s like our bodies are becoming fast fashion…
"I love tiktok I can make random strangers jealous of me by just showing them what I want to show them with multiple filters and layers of makeup" is what I would say if I can make ppl jealous
You just keep chipping away at society's flaws hopefully it reaches, because this whole video is something that I think everyone should be reminded of we are still human and we all look the way we do and that's okay, normal. Thanks Emily
I’m incredibly insecure about my body and every now and then I spend hours in front of my mirror nitpicking and criticizing my body until I make myself cry. You know as one does. But I sometimes have to take breaks from TikTok cause I’ll see all these women with amazing bodies that I wish I had and it ends up making me feel worse about myself.
Replace the nitpicking with kindness, even if it feels really forced. Stand in the mirror and point out all of the things you LIKE about your body. If that's difficult, start with things that aren't aesthetic like "I like that (insert part) functions properly, and it is good for that"
I’ve been in your shoes and the best decision I’ve made was to delete TikTok- trust me, it’ll be hard but it’s totally worth it
@@Nakia11798thank you for this suggestion
the way that social media sets the standard of modern beauty as being so precise that we all practically have to look the same, or we're inherently ugly, is just so gross. i try to stay away from that way of thinking and social media in general, but it's dangerous to be around so many people who don't even question where they get their beauty standards from is just...scary. something to definitely protect ourselves from. i say this as someone who just moved in with 2 people who literally get their ideas of beauty from tiktok and once i realized it started to rub off on me, i was like, hey, literally this isn't okay. this isn't me.
Social media is such a weird construct
this is good timing, in the wake of people slamming that NBA player for being ‘ugly’. and is it just me, or is it the people who love promoting ‘self-love’ who’ll then go out and be the most judgmental mfs?
Emily’s portrayal as a mom doing the Renegade gave me more laughs than normal to the point it’ll be living in my head rent-free for the next week. Thank you.
You have one of the prettiest faces I've ever seen, Emily. Seriously, you could be a Disney Princess with a face like that! And thank you for making this video! You just so happened to post this on my birthday! You're awesome! Thank you!
thank you 🥹 and happy birthday!!! :D
Happy birthday!!🎉
happy birthday random stranger !! hope u have a wonderful day:)
Happy birthday buddy 🥳. I hope you have a great day 🥂
happy birthday!! here’s to this year being your best yet 🥳
I remember when I was 13, I literally ate 1 slice of an apple for 6 months while exercising for 2 hours a day because TikTok pointed out hip dips. I deleted it in August and I feel sooo much better with myself lol.
that's extreme...I wonder why us humans are so easily influenced? there has to be some science behind it.
@@mufferducker822 Well I wish I found that page 2 years ago lol but good for you!❤️
@@katgreer6113 I am pretty sure there is science behind it, I think there is even a term but I cant quite recall it (google it, I believe it is called herd mentality lol)
Oh man I'm a dude but I feel for you
Every day I thank my country India for banning TikTok, it’s been like three years now. I know Ig reels and yt shorts still work here but they are way less toxic than what I remember TikTok was.
also the trend where people put on an ‘ugly’ nose then showed off their ‘pretty’ nose was antisemitic. they took a stereotypical ‘jewish nose’ and then showed off typically white features. not enough people talk about this issue so i liked when you used examples of it in this video
edited to fix an incorrect term
Funny thing when I saw that trend of people making their lips small and then showing off their big lips was offensive and I thought they'd never do the same thing with nose but apparently I was wrong, wow some people seriously have no empathy, and yes it's stereotypically jewish but there's plenty of ethnicities were the hooked nose is common... Very slimy behavior when people do these trends
THIS!! The people who promote these toxic trends love crapping on features that aren’t the “typical” White and European features.
it was anti lots of different ethnicities. a lot of people have big noses and i don't get why they have to be made to feel insecure about it
@@nothing-jl2dzooof yeah i forgot about the lips one… so weird
@@marnenotmarnie259 a lot of these people who do these trends actually have plastic surgeries and fillers though so in reality they hate how they genetically look and there's a rather large possibility they'll pass it on to their kids
The trend on the nose to mouth gap was the most ridiculous trend
that is insane WHAT!
What? I have so many questions
@@excellent8105 1 girl said she hated that there was a area from her nose to her mouth.
@@itswendy1002 ?!? youd look so weird without it
People just wanna look like a cartoon or something
The one trend i hate the most recently is "l only date tall guys" trend... the conversation about female beauty standards is loud and getting louder and this is a good thing, but in the meantime shorter men, that most of the time are just average height, get cyber bullied and talked down to with the messages like "no girL Will ever date you if you are shorter than 180" and i rarely see that being addressed
yeah I do agree, double standards meh
THIS!!!!! ^
That’s true but I think that should be a discussion on its own instead of bringing it up in comparison to women’s struggles
Beauty companies and influencers will sell you aging is a curse, when in fact its a blessing not given to most
This is why I can’t have tik tok or instagram. Instagram made me so depressed because I kept comparing myself to other people and this was happening at 11 years old. I’m 22 now and I can’t even imagine what it’s like for 9 year old girls to see these things.
I think it’s incredibly sad that there is only one beauty standard being pushed when so many things make people beautiful. It’s actually quite beautiful for humans to look different and have unique attributes.
I uninstalled tiktok a few months ago, and finally deleted my profile a month or so after that, and my quality of life has improved drastically. After tiktok went, I then deleted my twitter, then my facebook, leaving only my instagram so my grandma and wayward friends can catch glimpses of what i am up to when I do my 1 post a year.
The time, money, and joy of life I now find myself with have helped me deal with my own mental illnesses. I love the art I make, I love the friends and family I have in my life and I feel so much more present for all of it.
We all need to learn a lot less about each other.
“Her eyelashes are longer than the average childs life lifespan”!! Damn. Thats the kind of burn you find on the surface of the sun😂
I often used to compare myself to these conventionally attractive people thinking it is something I could achieve if I just did x and y, but I've realised I can't ever become like them. I'm not conventionally attractive, and it is okay. I am working on fixing what social media broke in me, and I've come a long way. I still wish to change things about myself, but only because I want to be healthy and have a sound mind, not because I want to look like someone else anymore. I have accepted the fact that I will probably never find a romantic partner because of the way I look, so if it happens I'll be positively suprised, but if it doesn't that's okay too. TikTok is the worst platform I've been on that promotes these unhealthy standards (I never was on tumblr so idk how it was there), but it's so addicting that I can't stop using it lol. Anyways, loved the video, I'm glad someone is talking about these insane trends.
a real life partner won't choose you because of your looks. as long as you have a healthy and open mind, I'm sure you'll be fine :]
@@maki2755 thank you, I appreciate the kind words :) and you are absolutely right!
i think this was why i stopped being on the side of tiktok that wasn't dedicated to fandoms because normal tiktok is just 10 different shades of the same body check trends. i felt ugly a lot growing up but now that it's finally starting to mellow out, i think i just pity anyone who seriously wants to keep fitting the ideal of this make believe person that tiktok is pushing
when i was a kid i remember feeling so ugly compared to everyone else, but the reality was that i looked like a kid and not an adult or even an older teen. i'm asian and so i looked several years younger than how i really was. i think the time i felt the ugliest was in 8th grade and almost everyone around me looked 15-16 and i looked like i was 12 even though we were all supposed to be 13 going on 14. i look back and dude i looked my age. it wasn't my fault everyone around me was starting to age like milk. i was just 13 why did i expect to look 16?
now that i'm 18 and everyone my age is looking 22-25, it's finally around that time that i want to look younger, but when i was a kid i just felt so out of place that it feels weird now that it's desirable. because before it felt like i was feeling like i had to forever play catch up with the people i grew up with and that it wouldn't stop until we were middle aged and started to level out our growth changes
It really sucks how social media has made us compare ourselves to others, where we should love ourselves for who we are 😢
Also your content is really entertaining, Emily 😊
why are people so bothered by asymmetry? that's literally why we're beautiful, I don't wanna look like Vegeta!
Omg I remember the thinspo phase on tumblr and now I feel like I’m seeing it more and more on TikTok now too. I don’t want that to come back because I developed and ED.
its okay to not love your body or the way you look sometimes and thats why i like the idea of body neutrality. its like body positivity, but acknowledging that we wont always feel good about ourselves, and we can still feel that way without making ourselves feel like shit
~idk if that made sense
I laughed too hard at "where's the uggo going?"
I've never really understood why people follow influencers just because of how attractive they are? Like personally if I find someone's content interesting I'm going to be thinking about what they're talking about rather than how much more attractive they are than me, and if I don't find their content interesting I'm not going to stick around just to ogle them? Idk if that's just me
Keep that up!
Same. I mean i like looking at pretty people, but i only really follow someone if i like what they *do*. I'll follow anyone if they have entertaining content, wether i find them attractive or not.
Some allosexuals 🤨
You just described why I hate a lot of men.
@@thecoolannishatk. YES!
your little skits never fail to make me laugh but this is so true !!!
I‘ve tried explaining to my best friend why I dont like seeing hot dudes on Ig or why I dont like face filters but it was kinda hard to explain tbh and she didn’t rly understand it but now I sent her that vid and u made everything so clear and made so many good points haha thanks for that I love ur vids sm man😭
I forgor what I was gonna say
half of my fyp is beautytok and its fun seeing attractive people doing makeup/hair but it gets depressing bc i know if i used the exact products it will not even be as close to that flawless as them
god that nose trend is particularly vile! i know so many people with hooked noses including members of my own family who feel selfconscious about their features, and for people to insinuate that they're "ugly" makes my blood boil. it's also got some downright horrible antisemetic undertones to boot. yikes all around.
2:53
Racially ambiguous is what everyone strives to be nowadays 😂😂. Looking at you Ariana and Nikita 👀
Also those videos that are like "if you don't interact x4 and use sound someone you love will die" are really bad for people too
I will forever admire Emily's ability to fit her sponsorships so effortlessly into every video
girl youre beautiful, dont let tiktok get in your head
ive never really used filters (beauty ones) like ever because i knew it would make me insecure lmao. sometimes people are surprised i dont use them
she never misses when bringing up the sponsor so unexpectedly
Happy New Year! Love your content! Your sense of humor brings joy to me.
yayyy thank you for watching ❤️❤️❤️
This is exactly why I deleted tiktok. It really made me feel the worst
3:18 missed opportunity to say "you can keep scrolling looking at baddie after baddie while you feel badder and badder about yourself"
I never downloaded tik tok because I didn't want to had a relapse on my ED, just watch the reels a month later on Instagram, it's the same thing without the risk, specially because beauty filters on IG suck lmao I always look so bad, like a child did my make up
I try not to look at online pictures of people, because for all you know, you could be comparing yourself to foam or photoshop.
Genuinely, I think the best decision I've ever made was getting rid of social media at the beginning of high school, because in my first year of College, I'm just now coming to terms with a lot of my self-esteem issues. I can't imagine how behind on that progress I would be if I'd spent the last four years of my life scrolling through millions of photos/videos of attractive women and partaking in these kinds of trends.
i can't express how my hatred for tiktok has grown over the years because of things like this, though i still have the app and post silly little edits of my silly little biases so im still contradicting myself
THANK YOU for talking about the ridiculousness of these filters and tiktok trends that are designed to make us feel like we need to change our faces and bodies -- especially promoting white features. I find myself resenting every creator that feeds into these trends, or those who sneakily use filters that make their skin look perfect/bodies look more snatched without letting their audience know that it's not real.
always remember who it benefits to create more insecurities...at the end of the day it's always about money.
8:39 Thank u for talking about this the trend made me feel horrible and even if its just a quick mention I still gave me comfort
The way you looked into the camera after “as in… make the Yuletide gay” SENT me
I firmly believe many of these beauty micro influencers thrive off of other peoples' insecurities and create new insecurities for others to feel bad about, while they are praised for having the "perfect" face
Not only that but they’re also often being sponsored by beauty companies, so their influenced audience with an already low self esteem will flock to buy the super expensive products, giving those influencers more profits. It’s so sad.
Man, good thing I got a superiority complex, better than hating myself-
I think what helps me with my own confidence is to recognize that other people probably want traits that I possess. I am insecure about my weak jawline as a man, but i wouldn't want it to be super pronounced either.
Yeah. I miss when My only way to feed My insecurities were hot celebs. Now plebs like I try to and somewhat succeed too? Unforgivable!
All jokes aside, it truly is scaaary how tiktok's become this way.
the worst videos are the ones where people post hot people (like their waiter or someone waiting at an airport) like “OMG he’s so fine”. it just makes me think about the fact that nobody would ever see me and post me with that caption. no matter how attractive i feel, i will never be that guy you can record and post and have people in the comments say they ship us two or talk about how attractive i am.
@@n48_art agreed it’s not something i desire either way. being attractive or unattractive both have their downsides. me personally i would prefer the downsides of being attractive but 😗🤷♀️
it's crazy, cus here in my country there's countless news of people going to plastic surgeons with a picture of them on a filter and just saying "make me look like this" so....wtf
Do I have TikTok? no.
Am I insecure? not really
Do I watch everything emily makes? hell yeah!
I don't know if I compare myself with the hot girls on tik-tok or if I control my urge to kiss them.
Tumblr was definitely fucked up but Tik Tok is soo much worse in every possible way, I could write an essay about this.
At least on Tumblr it was full of virtue signallers, tiktok is full of vice signallers
Fun Fact: Gay was a different word for happy back in the day
I’ve forced myself to not use filters so I just get exposure therapy to my insecurities bc omfg when I caught myself over analyzing my features and comparing myself to others I was like “oh no it’s the brain rot”
opinion: everyone's avarage
Honestly there is no point trying to change tik tok, delete the app, the world will be better without it
Omg when you were talking about how you were overly confident because you felt unlovable that makes so MUCH sense, I was having that same internal struggle LOL, I’m working on it everyday but thanks for putting that into words for me
the way she brought up the ad was so smooth...dayum...
"okay you're calling those ugly people 'them' as if you arent the one with a bag in your hand right now" DAMN WHAT THE HELL
honestly social media has just ruined me. the fact i already kinda hated my self recently and up a grade and school and the age where i should start dating, just ruined me. seeing girls id date and look good constantly, and knowing their dating, especially no one like me and way better looking than me, it just makes me worse and makes me feel i have 0 chance with the girl i like and why i even try and like her.
I think there is no youtuber who is a better advertiser than Emily ngl
deleting tiktok was one of the best decisions ive made so far. Its also helping me regain a sense of humor. The "humor" on that app has become so extremely sad. Dont get me wrong there are plenty of funny videos. But like theres some stuff that once u get rid if the app and ppl try to quote things ur like.... huh
This genuinely means so much to me. When I was younger I used to be super confident and happy with myself, but as I grew older and started spending a lot of time on social media, I did not only lose almost every trace of confidence and grew insanely insecure, but also experienced the overwhelming pressure of trying to fit into the beauty standard. There were times where I genuinely avoided looking in the mirror or give myself the tiniest compliment about my looks in front of other people because I was so sure that there was nothing attractive about me. I developed major body dysmorphia and started working out excessively to a point where I based all of my self confidence on the amount of abs I had or how clean my skin was. I still struggle with it sometimes, but I have definitely grown and learned a lot about what was shown on the internet and what was Reality and how I had to stop comparing myself to others and focus on loving me for who I am instead. So I love whenever that issue is addressed, because I believe that it is a thing that is affecting almost everyone in this generation and it feels good to get a reality check sometimes. Sorry for the tmi, but I just wanted to get that out there, I’m usually a silent watcher and rarely comment, but I appreciate this a lot!
Honestly, as someone assigned male at birth who desperately wants to look more feminine, I’ve realized the absolutely insane level of difference between how much appearance is valued by society for each gender. I honestly Never cared about my appearance until pretty recently, when I started to want to look more “feminine”.
This in-depth review was needed! I havent used. A single filter but i have seen how much it modifies your face. The effect on our psyche is tremendously negative.
I stopped using mine and I feel fine about it. I’m tired of being fed botox commercials and plastic surgeons saying what I would need to “perfect” my face and body
This is why I deleted tiktok
These skits are hilarious! I've been controlling my use of social media for a while, and Tiktok is something I refused to regularly use from the start. I'd open it, post a video, and leave. I deleted my account there a few weeks ago, as I've started perceiving it as just a waste of time. Anyways, ever since I stopped using the internet as often these ways of thinking (and many other aspects of society) just feel like a different world to me. I'm just chilling in my corner, I recommend it.
Deleted tiktok, best decision of my life Lmfao. I genuinely have a just like good baseline confidence level
Even though im a Stereotypical Generation Z tiktok has always been too intense for me lol. Its even weirder when ur trans, so all body stuff is not only a way to make you feel weird and dysphoric about your transition, but is sometimes treated as inherently political(also a lot of popular trans activism on tiktok- at least when I had it- was kinda??? tranphobic??? lmao)
YEAH in a very exclusive kinnd of way I know what you mean with the transphobia
It may be normal to not be pretty but no one wants to be normal
I don't know, I've hated myself for far longer than SM has been around. I DO hate myself less now.
I remember how tiktok effected me that even my sister told me to delete it, I already have low self esteem but that fcking app made it even worse, thankfully i don’t use it anymore but only to see my faves edit or for memes