Trauma bonding over our childhoods & how we got through the hardest times of our lives | Ep. 11
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- Опубліковано 27 бер 2024
- Grab some tissues! In this week's podcast we talk about our childhood: the good, the bad, and what we'll never forget. We touch on some of the hardest moments of our lives including divorce and losing a loved one. This was a tough one to record but we hope we can show people who may be in hard situations that there's a possibility for a happy and fulfilling life after tragedy. we love you guys.
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A friend recently told me that her psychologist once said that people spend most of their adult life getting over what took place in their childhood. Another said it's not what happens to you as a child, it's how you deal with it as an adult.
So true! Thank you
Thank you. That is very well said.
Well said.
Absolutely
So true
Id like to thank you for sharing your story about your sister's passing . My 18 year old son died in a car accident 2 years ago. His brothers were 13, 16, and 19 ar the time. Your perspective gives me insight and I am so sorry for your loss. The sudden loss for you and being so close to your sister is devastating. I hope you feel Amanda with you always.
So so sorry for your loss!
So sorry for your loss! ❤
I'm so sorry for your suffering.
I'm so very sorry for your loss. ❤
I'm so sorry for your loss
Being a big sister and watching Sarah talk about missing out on some of the big sister moments broke my heart.
Same. 💞
Same 💔
Sarah is such an angel. I'm usually skeptical of influencers (internet life always seems so fake), but she genuinely seems like such a pure, sweet soul. Everything she's been through, and she still sees the good. Her husband and kids are so lucky to have her.
I know 🥺 I see red when I see people online making hate videos about her and their families. They all seem like truly genuinely kind hearted people that just like sharing their lives and growing families together. I don’t in the slightest get the vibe that they exploit their kids for money like so many family channels do, and I hate when people are mean to them 😭
@@sarwall_ Exactly my thoughts. I think so far, I've seen all videos they have & none show any sign they abuse or use their children for profit. Everything is clearly sharing their family to us all. I think the podcast brings the light & show how true these girls are.
@@gebruederflausch completely agree!! Maybe it’s just a second nature for me, but I’ve truly my whole life been able to read people in a matter of minutes after meeting them and can tell what their vibe/energy is immediately, and although I don’t know them personally, I don’t get the slightest hint of that from them. They seem like two girls who are great friends that are goofing off having a great time and probably can’t believe still that they get to do this for a living and who wouldn’t feel that way?! Darkness always comes to the light anyways no matter how deep these people try to hide their skeletons, but personally the vile/money hungry/greedy type is pretty easy to snuff out off rip in my opinion. So happy they started this podcast 💖 I look forward to listening every week! Listening to genuine people talk about life is so refreshing in this evil world 😊
Lo too! They both just seem so genuine to who they are. They don’t pretend to be perfect and are generally positive and kind
This is their income. Anyone that makes money by putting their lives on social media expects opinions. It's all in the numbers
I lost my big brother in an airplane accident 11 years ago at the end of May. I would say the #1 thing you can do for someone going through trauma and loss is to just let them be in the emotion they are in even if it makes you uncomfortable. If they are angry, sad, bitter, happy, laughing. Whatever it is just sit there with them in that emotion and don’t try to “fix it” because you cannot fix it. You just can’t,
So sorry for your loss sweetheart ❤️🙏🏻🙏🏻🙏🏻🙏🏻❤️
@@lisabennett2490 ❤️
I also lost my sister, my deepest sympathy to you. ❤I agree, don't try to fix it, it can't be fixed! Also, don't be afraid to say their name, talk about them, celebrate their lives, and please, don't say, It was God's will. That's devastating.
@@hollybeam332 I am so sorry for the loss of your sister. My eldest sister died three years ago from ovarian cancer. It’s a hard pill to swallow when you lose a sister.
Thank you for sharing this advice. My husband just lost his 19 year old son, and I have been desperately researching, buying books, and spent sleepless nights worrying about him and our family. My intuition told me to do exactly what you said, just sit and listen, cry with them, and follow their lead each day as each day is different. It can be very uncomfortable and it will break you to see the people you love in such deep pain and you can't fix it, however you need to remain strong for them. Thank you for being honest and open.
This is not the scariest podcast on the planet. It is the most raw and beautiful podcast I have ever had the privilege of watching. Thank you for being so vulnerable and sharing your story because I know there’s so many people out there that need to hear this to not feel alone. I love you both soooo much!!! Thank you for starting this Podcast because you ladies have brought so much laughter, love and humanity that this world needs. ❤
@Crose8587 Your statement is so kind.🤗
Thank you, Sarah, for sharing your story. I lost my identical twin sister at the age of 14 it's been over 30 years now, and still I cry like it was yesterday talking about her and the loss and what I remember. I do share my story from time to time. She is still very much with me. Things are not all clear for me as you go numb in a way. It took me so long to finally feel like she wasn't going to walk in the door. I have 3 beautiful kids now, and at each birth, my sister was there. She wore a certain perfume, and my mom and I always smelled it when my babies came into the world. I've now lost my dad and my mom there were only us 4 in my immediate family so I have a lot of trauma I deal with. This podcast was your best one ladies!!! It took me a while to watch the whole thing but again thank you too you both. Lo you're such a wonderful parent to your sweet girls! And Sarah you too!
😢🙏
💯
Bless you. Thank you for sharing your story. I'm so grateful your sister was there at each of your children's births. So touching.
I respect Lo so much, seeing how much she loves her dad despite his mistakes. It's takes a big heart to do that 🥺
0:23 was sad
Cheating isn’t a mistake
@@maddiescroger9383, That's the truth !! My dad also cheated on my Mom and also my Step Mom. I had 2 more moms after that and I'm not sure if he cheated on them but ......Yeah. He was a Cheater .
@@darlabingham6023 I agree. Cheating is NEVER ok and is extremely hurtful and often cause lifelong trauma to the main victims. I will never understand how people can so nonchalantly act like cheating is something that can be forgiven.
There’s no perfect family! There’s always struggles within a family.
Oh my goodness… I have to pause this and take a break…. I lost my best friend who was like my little sister to a car accident and everything you said Sarah resonates with me so much. Watching you tell your story has me so choked up and flashing back to moments in my life when I had her with me… feeling like no one could possibly understand the gut wrenching pain I was in and carry with me on a daily basis… but we aren’t alone and listening to you talk about it helps me realize that, so 🙏🏼 thank you for sharing. I know it was not easy.
Ive actually commented on other of your videos the two of you have done together cause the sister in law friendship you both have with each other filled with laughter and giggles and inside jokes makes me think about my friend and the happy memories I got to share with her. Just thank you.🥹🥺
Sarah I’m so sorry for the devastating loss of your sister…the pain in your voice 😞
Lo, the same exact thing happened to me when I was 9. My dad used to disappear for days at a time for “work”…finally, my dad’s business partner told my mom the truth. She walked in on him having dinner with his “fiancée” of 2 years. He went by a different name, she had no idea he was married with 2 kids. He had a P.O. Box, another apartment..the works. My mom is aROCKSTAR! She raised us without a dime of support from my loser dad. She worked 3 jobs and my grandparents watched us after school. We had a great childhood. Sadly, I have huge trust issues and I’m always searching for signs of betrayal in every relationship and I’ve ruined many. You hit the jackpot with Tanner. You are so very blessed. 🙏❤️
Don’t let something that happen when you were nine years old affect how you treat people and let it ruin your relationships cause you to have trust issues I don’t know how that could affect you from nine years old I barely remember being nine gotta be coming from something else just don’t let him ruin your future good luck to you
@@lisathornton8543 you can’t remember being 9 years old? The unwarranted suspicions were not something I was consciously aware of growing up. I figured it out when I got older. But yes, jealousy was a big deal when I was younger.
My dads perfect and I still have trust issues believing someone would want to date me or stay. (Low self esteem) so feel your feelings. Feelings dont have to be logical or reasonable to be valid. Acknowledging them and maybe how they began is a big step in personal growth. Now we just gotta figure out how to make it through or past those feelings. 😅 and yeah dude you don't remember being nine? Most people's earliest memories are around age 5. Age 9 is third and fourth grade...
@@lisathornton8543 it’s not how I treated people, it was how I let them treat me…..I’m great now…..have had several very good, trusting relationships. It didn’t ruin me..I have a great life.
@@lisathornton8543 Are you kidding? I have no appropriate words for this comment. Obviously you’ve had an idyllic childhood (and I’m being sincere when I say this), I’m grateful for that. Because way too many times people don’t have that.
As a mom who went thru H and back with my NOW deceased husband, who was an emotional, verbal abuser and cheater…I witnessed HOW his behavior and LACK of presence formed my 3 children’s world..despite everything I could do to prevent them from knowing anything he did to me or our marriage. Children are KEENER than we adults are kidding ourselves.
Of course Lo has childhood wounds from her 9 year old self. She’s working thru them. Just because she has an amazing life now doesn’t NEGATE what she endured during her formative years. Im grateful for her testimony. ❤
Sarah sharing your story publicly is so healing for not only you but others ❤
“Grief is just love with no place to go.”
I only watched the introduction so far, but I too had a childhood of parents screaming at each other.
Thank God you were able to break that cycle. I could not imagine that life for Ozzy and Stella.
Amen! ❤
I too grew up with parents that did not even seem like they liked each other.. let alone love.. it’s a toxic environment and Im so glad you came out in the other side in spite of it all.. just shows you can be what ever you want to be!! Well done💕💕💕💕💕
Thank you for being willing to tell your stories. Having love in your hearts is the strongest tool on earth and the hereafter. Your joy for life is explosive, powerful and you are both the most amazing mothers. Remain stalwart, no matter what life throws you. It can be one heck of a ride as you’ve found out so far. So proud of you both! Sending along virtual hugs 💞💞
My heart goes out to you ❤ My parents divorced but hated each other and didnt try to hide it either. Its affected all my relationships whether familial (hope thats the correct wording), romantic or friendship-wise...its hard to let people get to close. Theres other devastating things from my childhood that impacted those trust issues but they are too deep to get into. Either way Ive made it one of my life's missions to see the world from a joyous, positive outlook. I still stumble but I'll never stop giving it my best effort to overcome everything. Sending everyone an abundance of loving, prosperous, and peaceful energy. May your life be everything you dream it to be ❤❤
Thank you for sharing the difficulties of your childhoods. Parents who obviously don't love each other - and some who even hate each other - inevitably create sometimes insurmountable trauma for their children. I'm grateful you are living authentically and with joy in spite of it.
I find it comforting when you talk about your sister because I also lost my brother in an accident 14 years ago 🩵
Sorry for your loss sweetheart ❤🙏🏻🙏🏻🙏🏻🙏🏻🙏🏻❤️
Sarah, I remember a comment that your dad made in Sunday school after the passing of your sister and I have never forgotten it… all these years. His comment was about sympathy and empathy , and how you truly can’t have empathy unless you have gone through the same thing. It was a profound insight that has stayed with me til now.
Not true, you can empathise without having gone through the same thing, you simply need to listen and feel the emotion of the other person. What you can’t do is give out advise if you have not experienced it yourself, your advise will be shallow.
Thank you for being so vulnerable about childhoods and your guys hardships. It’s been so nice to hear other people that are influencers going through similar situations. I am loving these deep podcasts! 💗💗
I just love you girls. So brave to share and you didn’t even break into the ugly cry. I had the same thing happen in my family, and it devastated our entire family. I’m 70 now and still breaks my heart to even look at a picture of her.😂❤
I love the fact that they have each other to lean on in a safe nonjudgmental space, and that they hold no grudges,my family was completely different and it has filtered down to the grandkids and it's sad to see .
I’m so honored that you shared these stories with us :,)
i’m so sorry about your sister, sarah. i lost my big sister, too, everything you felt and feel now is exactly how it goes. and yes, she will always be with you.
lauren, i want to just hug you.
Sarah and Lo! Omg my heart and my poor eyes! I immediately started crying just thinking about losing one of my little sisters! They are my world, my favorite gossip team, and my support and helpers remembering the good times with our mother who passed in 2010 when we were in our early 20's. And then AGAIN when Lo started with the not so normal parenting early in life! Our parents fought, I even had a hiding spot in a coat closet with my sister's to escape during the day if we couldn't get outside or in our room easily. It's not an easy start to life, but it also made you who you are!
You're both so lucky to have each other, and so STRONG!
OUR only goal is to give our children better than we had, and hopefully less chaos and sadness! ❤️
Thank you both for sharing your experiences. I totally agree with you Sarah about being there for someone who is grieving. I lost my daughter during birth full term at 26 years old. The amount of things that people said to be still baffles me. But my best friend said something that I will forever stand by. She said “I dunno what to say” and I said thank you for saying that and she said “just know I love you and I’m here for you” and that meant the world to me. Because there is nothing you can say nothing will take the pain away nothing will make it better.
❤❤ my heart goes out to you, seriously. As a mom of 3 at 32, I can’t fathom the pain, or obstacles you’ve overcome, it takes a TRULY strong person.
A therapist told me it's the desire to heal & move on that helps one cope with loss, drama, change!!!
Thank you both for sharing your stories of growing up. My husband was 16 years older than his sister. He was the first of 4 boys, and then his baby sister came along and made him feel so lucky to have her. He was really hoping we would have girls. He and his brothers all had ADHD. So, it was crazy around there. I felt bad for his parents because they probably just thought having boys was crazy busy. My husband and I met when his sister Katie was just one. Losing her in a car accident changed my husband. It changed his faith. He was angry at the world. He did finally go to a therapist to help him put on an anti-depressant. He said she had 4 older brothers, and they couldn't even do the one job that was to keep her safe. When she was killed, she was 14. She told her parents she was sleeping over at a friend's house.The driver who fit 8 kids in her car at 2am was way over the legal limit, and she was also a mother of 2 kids. One was just a little baby. We have forgiven her, and she was recently let out of prison. I learned never to let my daughter's go to sleepovers, except one friend and her sister, because we were good friend's with them. My husband gets mad that I have a different memory of that morning phone call. I swear he didn't tell me she had been killed, and i didn't get over to his parent's house for a little while because I was trying to get our kids over to my parent's. He said that she had an accident. I had no idea that it was that kind of accident. So by the time I made it to his parents' house, the first thing I asked was what happened and will she be ok? He was really upset with me for saying that. He said it really didn't matter what happened, and here I am thinking well where is she? 2 weeks before, she had a dresser fall on her, so i was thinking it was something like that. He swears he told me that she died after the phone call. My therapist says that when a trauma happens, you try to block out the really bad parts. It is natural.
Lo, I think that your Mom is really great. To be able to still let your Dad come over for Christmas is a huge deal. She is definitely a good woman. I didn't realize that you had a sister. I knew you had a brother from your music.
I’m going through a divorce. We have a 1 year old. I often worry about how she’ll look back on this as an adult, how she’ll view her father, how she’ll feel about living in 2 homes etc. Hearing Lo’s story and others like it is important for me. She’s still a healthy, loving whole hearted person and she is thankful for her mom. I hope my baby is too in the future.
this episode literally has me in tears ;-; my older sisters are my absolute best friends and i cant even begin to imagine how hard that was for you sarah. thank you so much for your vulnerability in sharing that. it really helps me not take it all for granted
I have always told my boys that life is not easy. Trying to express to them that everyone, every family has tough times. We have to support each other with love.❤❤I know ❤️
What’s important is seeking professional help with pathological issues. Frequent arguing, losing control of emotions, etc isn’t something just worked through or fixed with a bandaid. It is possible to be in control 99% of the time for most people, we just don’t have the tools necessary and that’s why therapy is so important for every person
When my mom lost her mom she said the best thing anybody said was my dads aunt who said nothing at all and just gave her a big long hug. Sometimes saying less or saying nothing is better❤
My husband and I met when we were 14. He had 4 younger brothers. We helped raise them all since the mother is so unstable and no father around. We loved them so much. As if they were our own kids. We raised them with our own kids. In September 2022 we lost one of them to fentanyl, 6 months and one day later we list another… we have basically been on auto pilot since then. Zombies … it’s so hard to go on with life after such HUGE losses… it tears apart your soul.
I understand why your parents had a hard time. Also, I’m so proud of them for making it through. ❤ your perspective is helpful in regards to my children. Thank you for sharing. 🙏🏼
My sister is exactly 8 years older than me and she is my best friend, i wasn't able to hold back tears. You are so strong, i am so honored that you shared your story ❤
I am 8 years older than my sister, and it's so great to see this (no siblings in between)
Not only did I cry the whole time bc I lost my little brother two years ago in a traumatic accident, but also just watching how much you two genuinely love and care for each other is just so beautiful. It’s so rare to find a friendship like that, let alone a sister in law 💖 it reminded me so much of my best friend that was murdered 5 months before my brothers accident and my heart hurts bc of how much I miss her. I’m so grateful I got to experience a friendship like that once in my life 🤍 I can’t wait to be reunited one day with her and my brother. Hearing Sarah talk about the hospital brought back so many memories I think I’ve suppressed; my brother was on life support for two days after his motorcycle accident and unfortunately his brain injury was inoperable bc it was too severe, so the doctors told us that there was no chance of him coming back from that. My parents made the agonizing decision to remove him from life support and it was like we had to grieve multiple times, first after the accident, and then again anticipating him passing after he was off of life support. The memory I have of walking alone down a long dark hallway to the room they put my parents in to give them the news will forever haunt me. My parents must have told them all I was coming, bc the looks on all of the entire staff members’ faces when I walked in was like they were waiting for me and they all already knew my brother wasn’t going to make it before I did. So much of the trauma between that and my best friend being murdered with her boyfriend my brain has just completely blocked out I’m sure in shock and to try to protect me. I’m eager to start EMDR therapy soon, I’ve heard it’s life changing for ptsd and trauma like this 😢
Your therapy will really help you so please do it asap.
You find others like yourself & those who have been successful in recovery from traumas like this. 😉
Thank you for sharing your story. I'm so very sorry. I'm grateful you will start EMDR soon. I hope it's healing for you.
@@GeoffreyLaureate thank you!
@@deborrastrom8559 thank you 😊 💖
Oh wow girls I am 52 (soon) from Northumberland UK and you girls have had me in tears my heart is hurting for you both. Life is so hard and you have both turned into the most beautiful of people inside and out. Keep being this awesome. And it's never too late for therapy. ❤
thank you so much sarah for opening about the loss of your sister. It was obviously hard to talk about, and I think it takes a lot of bravery to be this vulnerable on social media. My brother died 4 years ago in a car accident to, and I've felt so alone in it all this time because I hardly know anyone else who has lost a sibling. I can totally relate to how surreal it feels to lose someone so young and close to you, and how weird it feels going from a family of 5 to 4. You give me hope that despite this huge pain in my life, my family can still be full and happy. love you guys
My sister died when she was just short of her 23rd birthday super unexpectedly. It’s so hard to talk about, I commend you being able to share this and your way of grief as well as your families. It changes everything forever
Amanda and I were the same age. My graduating class was 06’ in Lehi. I’m so sorry for your loss! But I do want to say thank you for your sister being an organ donor and saving lives after her tragic passing. She’s an angel. I have stage 4 cirrhosis and am on the transplant list. ❤️ what a beautiful and selfless act for such a young woman to have done. Hugs to you both.
Every single person has a reason they are who they are. It’s so refreshing to see such “pretty perfect girls” tell their perspectives to growing up. I struggle raising my own kids because this is the time we have to literally give our all to, & every single thing we’re doing is building a teeny tiny character and that feels very heavy somedays. (I hope that makes sense.) When I grew up I realized just how young my parents were, and compared those ages to myself. You just can’t imagine having to do what they did to get you where you are today. Breaking cycles, long hours, selfless love that only parents can really dish out.
Thanks for sharing your stories. ❤ It doesn’t change anything, but knowing people out there still believe in compassion selflessly is very comforting. The world can seem very cold sometimes.
Wise young ladies...I'm 78 and your friendship is very real...to express such difficult experiences so freely is healing. Enjoy your marriages and children!
I’m crying with you Sarah ❤ your love for your sister is so SO evident. Thank you both for being so raw and open to share, this is how we stay connected as humans. ❤
gosh i LOVE you both so much. thank you both for being so vulnerable w us ❤️ despite not really relating to your stories, i find bits and pieces where i found myself being seen and understood. and seeing how many people resonate w ur stories and finding comfort in that, brings me so much comfort as well. sending so much love from me to the both of you, and anyone else who’s gone through similar things. ❤️
Thank you so much for being willing to share your stories. My boyfriend has lost 2 of his siblings at 2 completely different part of his life. I told him about Sarah’s story and it helps him and his family not feel so alone. It also helps me to know how to help him and his family with this from Sarah’s perspective of going through the loss of a sibling. You guys are so strong and we are here for you. Thanks again for sharing!
I love how you guys encourage each other when the topic gets heavy. It leads to a deeper conversation instead of closing off.
My parents divorced at a similar age for me and it was heart wrenching, especially since I couldn’t villainize anyone and as a youngest child too, it’s super lonely when its just you in the house. Especially when everyone has moved on and is starting their own lives (as they should!) but it feels sometimes like you’ve been left behind.
Two things, I also lost a sister in an auto accident and it truly changes everything for you personally and as a collective family, it's s brutal trauma which caused me anxiety of abandonment. I feel for you Sarah, much love.
Lo, BRAVO to you for breaking the cycle of not only a broken family but, how much you go above and beyond to create beautiful memories with your girls and Tanner. You both are wonderful wives and mothers. ❤
You two are awesome. You're so lucky to have each other to share these things with. I lost my Dad at 13 yrs old. He died in front of me when we were home alone with each other. My Mom had just had a stroke 3 days before and was staying with my Uncles Family. I understand all your going through Sarah. It gets better with time but the trauma will always be there but so much less. I love you both and Lauren, it's not that I'm saying these kinds of traumas are less than what you went through, it's just I relate to Sarah having gone through something similar. Sarah and Lauren don't keep it bottled up talking about it helps alot. Great Podcast as usual. God Bless.😢
I'm balling im so sorry Sarah!! I lost my mom suddenly last yr. on my bday Im still struggling and your story takes me right back to that day. So sorry!! She is 1000% still watching over you & your kids.
Sara, I just want to give you a HUGE HUG and just tell you THANK YOU FOR SHARING SOME OF YOUR STORY WITH ALL OF US!❤ It sounds to me like your Brain was doing for you, what you COULDN'T do for yourself, and that was Protecting Your Heart❤ Your Strength, Determination, and your Ability To Smile through Tragedy is a Beautiful Thing and I think we could all learn ALOT FROM YOU❤
Sarah, this is in response to your question on why we remember certain memories and not, I just want to share an insight I have learned years ago, is that our memories that we are aware of, are the ones associated with strong emotional situations and they get imprinted with that association. Just like scientists explain that our eyes are constantly taking very quick snap shots of what is seen on the retina, but yet we only recall parts of the day we just lived and not all the snap shots, the ones we remember are the ones we attach strong emotional responses to.
Thank you for sharing your journey with us. I am grateful that you are feeling connected and comfortable with your life to do so. May God continue to heal and bless you as you continue your journey here on earth. You will see your sister one day and spend eternity together in God’s loving arms. ❤❤
Man y'all making me cry while I'm watching this at work, haha! Thank you for being so vulnerable and for sharing your stories with us. What a blessing it is for us to know of eternal families! I know that Amanda is with Sarah and her family often, smiling and protecting them!
Hugs, Sarah!!! I lost an older brother, who, I was very close to, when I was ten. I'm crying with you. We never get over such loss, we simply learn to live with the loss.
So sorry for your lost sweetheart ❤️🙏🏻🙏🏻🙏🏻🙏🏻❤️
Sorry for your loss sweetheart ❤️🙏🏻🙏🏻🙏🏻🙏🏻❤️
@@lisabennett2490 Thank You!
The honor and respect of your parents is such a great testimony for the world! Thank you so much for sharing. 🙏🙏🙏❤️
Thank you for sharing your story Sarah ♥️ I lost my little brother in a tragic accident a little over two years ago and this really hit home. He was 26 and our family has never been the same since. The trauma of it all is most times too much to handle 💔 I’m so sorry for anyone that also knows this pain.
I am so sorry for your loss. I hate the pain that everyone has gone through, but I am really glad that Sarah shared her story. Lo too. There are countless people this could reach and possibly help. Sending you so much love.
@@KelseyMc6 thank you for your kind words 🥹💖 I’m sure they debated a lot on whether to make this episode or not and I’m so glad they did, I was in tears the whole time. Not only from their stories, but also what a genuinely beautiful friendship that they have. It’s so rare to find a friend like that, let alone a sister in law! It reminds me so much of my best friend that passed 🥺 I miss her so much. The first half of my heart was broken when she was “unalived” (I’ve had comments blocked for using the other word lol) with her boyfriend 5 months before my brother’s accident 💔 she was like a sister to me, and I’m so grateful that I got to experience a friendship like that at least once in my lifetime, as I know sadly many people never get to. I have 15 years of millions of the best memories with her 🙂 and I can’t wait to see her again one day.
I relate so much to Lo as well, growing up hearing nothing but your parents yelling and fighting daily, it’s heartbreaking how damaging that is for children to grow up seeing, I never saw an example of a good relationship growing up and chose horrible partners subsequently. I hope I can heal that trauma and stop the cycle with my two girls 💖 they heal me daily a little piece at a time
I think it is so incredibly brave to be this vulnerable in general but especially to the public. Thank you for sharing ❤🩹
You two ladies have a lot of bottled up sadness and trauma. You both work very hard at being strong, stoic and happy. It might be a good idea for both of you to find a person or group where you can freely unload these feelings with no worries about how they impact others. You will feel much lighter and less burdened. Thanks for sharing such painful stories.
i haven’t lost anyone too close to me, but at some point i will… that’s something that unites all of us, although i don’t know if we can „prepare ourselves”.
for now i’m scared to even imagine losing one of my 4 sisters!
and Lo’s relationship with her father is touching. i’d think i’d lose all respect for the person in that situation… that’s something to think about, that people who made such mistakes sometimes are less judgmental and more accepting.
thank you both for sharing! it’s therapeutic to even watch how therapeutic it is for both of you.
This whole video had me sobbing 😭 You both are so incredibly brave for sharing your stories. As someone who grew up with a “normal but not normal” childhood I so appreciate your transparency. It truly has inspired me to open up more on our platform, because these comments 😭 you guys are truly changing lives and your genuineness does NOT go unnoticed!!!! Sending hugs to both of you 🥰
Thank you for sharing about losing your older sister-I’m so sorry for your loss. I loved my older sister so much- she passed from breast cancer at 57. Which was too young. I stayed with her the last week of her life. I loved her so much. Your honest sharing brought that feeling of love back. Thank you 💗
Ugh, i admire your strength so much Sarah! My sister also passed away in a car wreck at 20 years old, in 2013. I was only 16. I felt every bit of emotion in this video. Thank you for this
I’m so sorry for your loss, Sarah. April 12th will be 10 years since my brother’s passing. He was 17 and also died in a car accident. I’m nervous to hit that milestone, and it is crazy to think that now I am 26, married, have a baby who turns one just two days after that milestone, etc. I know he would have loooooved my husband and my little boy, and it can be difficult to allow myself to sit with the thought that they will never know him. He was my best friend. But all of that to say, I see you and thank you for sharing your experience. It is evident you have allowed your experiences in life to make you stronger and change you for the better 🤍
I just wanted to say how much I enjoy your podcast. I've watched you both since the pandemic and I just really feel like we would be friends even though we have alot of differences but after this episode sadly realize we have one thing in common. My brother passed unexpectedly in August of 2022 and my world has been flipped upside down. When my sister told me I fell to my knees screaming 'no he's not dead'. I screamed no and cried so intensly that the fire department arrived at my door. They asked if everything was alright and I said no- my brothers dead and he's never coming back. I remember everything too about that day. I have 3 siblings and my brother was the oldest of us 4 . We all live in different states and I remember my sister calling and asking if I was home (she didn't want to tell me and then have me have to drive) . I told her no but that I would be shortly. She said 'ok well make sure you call me as soon as you get settled in. It's important ' I asked if everything was OK if everyone was OK and she said yes. I asked if I had done something. She said no. I had just gotten out of the shower and was still just wrapped in my towel. I called my sister. I was opening a collagen packet with a pair of scissors ad she told me 'Rob fell' I asked if he was in the hospital. She said 'No eski (my nickname given to me as a child by my brother) he didn't make it' . I've never fallen to my knees. My world came crashing down. I kept screaming 'where are you? WHERE ARE YOU?!' It's been 1 year , 7 months and 4 days since he passed and not a day has gone by without so many of my thoughts being on him. He had a heart attack. My family has been crushed and I don't know what you said about going from a family of 5 to 4 really resonated with me because I always think how the 6 of us will never be together again. Thank you for sharing your story. I don't know how to send this privately so I guess it's public but everyone where I live has seen me ugly cry since Rob passed so as my mom says now 'so what who cares' because so much doesn't matter as much as it used to now that he is gone. Anyways I apologize for how long this message is
I'm so sorry for your loss. You and your family are in my prayers 🙏.
I lost my dad when I was 16 and my brother was only 14. I completely understood every emotion you expressed I went through and still carry those same vivid memories of that day. I appreciate you for being so vulnerable and sharing such a hard time in your life. Sending love and hugs your way ❤
Thank you for sharing your story Sarah. It’s a fantastic reminder to tell your people you love them all the time and appreciate them while you have them. Losing a loved one is never easy and following those two pieces of advice won’t make it any easier when/if the end comes, but it will leave you with wonderful, happy memories when it does.
Both of you ladies have come a long way, matured beautifully, and have handled your respective traumas gracefully. Each situation is completely different but realistically they are so so similar. A divorce is basically losing someone, and then having to grieve that loss.
I lost my husband at 37. He passed unexpectedly, leaving me with 3 small children; the youngest being only 2. I lost his aunt 2 days before my husband and our family dog within 4 months. I also lost my husband's brother's wife and her kids as she uprooted them and moved out of state, leaving her so-called abusive(she just wanted sole custody) husband. She did that right before my husband's passing. So I lost not only one of my best friends but 1 niece and 1 nephew. She left the oldest here and Dad and I finished raising him. So I lost 6 loved ones pretty much at the same time. I was devastated. My counselor said she was surprised I didn't have a nervous breakdown.
In my opinion, in dealing with loss, conversation is a key piece in the grieving process. The more you talk about all of it, the pain and loss, the more and faster you heal 💔❤ Sarah and Lo, someday soon, you'll be able to talk about your losses and not cry so hard. I think you are doing great 🩷💚🩷💚🩷💚🩷💚🩷💚🩷💚
lo im so glad you shared about your dad. i have a similar relationship with my dad where he hasn’t been as present as he could have been and i have struggled because our relationship isn’t what i want. you saying “but he’s my dad and he’s what I’ve got” hit me so hard because we are given what we are given and we do just have to learn to love where we are and who we’re with even if they aren’t the best sometimes. i appreciate you sharing that, it’s not easy.
Sarah, you’re too pure! Also never apologise for crying. It’s your body is way of releasing that emotion that you’re feeling. It made me cry listening to what you had to go through. I did see your story of your post once when it was your sister’s birthday, but I did not know the story at all. I can’t even imagine the pain. Thank you so much for considering your viewers capable enough that you can share this part of yourself and your story. It takes a lot of courage. Honestly, I’m just proud of you!
That comment about going from 5-4 is SO real! I had the hardest time with that for the longest time when my brother who was also 8 years older than me passed. Sometimes it still stirs up all kinds of emotions. Thank you for sharing ladies 🩷💚
I appreciate both of you guys' willingness to share such personal trauma and how you both navigated through it!
I think you two are incredibly brave. To say it out loud is one thing, but to share it like this is amazing. I truly think both of your stories will help many people who have gone though or are currently going though the same types of situations. Sending love to you both 🩷
My youngest brother died in his sleep many years ago. It's not something you ever get over 41 years later it still brings tears to my eyes. 😢
I like that Lo asked for a favorite memory. I lost a son when he was 19 and I love when someone asks about him.
Love both of you girls! Sarah im so sorry for the loss of your sister. Being 13 and going through that trauma is terrible. You are so strong and your big sis is watching down on you smiling ❤ Thank you for being so vulnerable and sharing this part of your life. Lo i totally relate to you about not having the normal father daughter relationship growing up. My father was absent growing up in my life, but i know deep down he loves me and i love my father dearly.
As someone w a dad who has also made some bad decisions that really effected my family, I really relate to Lo saying “he’s just my dad and he is who I got as my dad” I love him even though he has many faults and I’ve always felt loved by him. Thanks for being vulnerable guys 💚
Hi ladies! I just found your podcast and subscribed. Thank you both for being so open and honest. I’m sure there are so many people going through similar situations. I have an older sister and a younger brother. The three of us are very close so I can’t imagine the grief and sadness you felt Sarah, when you lost your beloved sister. My heart goes out to you. I can certainly relate to your story Lo. My parents divorced when I was very young (I think I was 3 years old). My entire childhood I longed for my dad. I saw him about 2-3 times per year but still missed him terribly. Like your mom, my mom was devastated and heartbroken when she got divorced but somehow managed to do an amazing job as a single, working mother. Money was tight but we always seemed to have what we needed. My mom was one of the bravest women I’ve ever known. As an adult my Dad and I built a great relationship and had a special bond. Unfortunately both my parents have passed away and I still miss them every day. Through the grace of God I know we will be together again one day in the glorious kingdom of heaven. Grief and sadness affects us all but it’s always good to be reminded that you’re not alone. God bless you both and your beautiful families.💝
Thank you guys for being so open and vulnerable with us. I strongly related to Lo and her situations with family arguing especially at bed time. Sarah I’m so sorry for your loss.
Thank you ladies for sharing. I lost my baby sister when I was 9 and she was 5. I held her in my arms when she said her last words - her head hurt. She died of an aneurysm. Later in life, I lost my brother, my bestie, in a tragic work accident. I was 37, he was 27 - I’m now 55 and I have never gotten over either death of my siblings. You learn to use your coping mechanisms, but you never really can fill that void. And that’s ok - they are my angels, those of us who have lost people we love…we are blessed with our personal angels watching over us 🙏🏼 sending love to both of you amazing mamas!
Thank you for your courage Sarah and Lo for supporting you.Very, very touching, very, very real.... talking about grief is so important , to put it into words...much compassion for you and your family...much ❤ sent your way xxxx
What a great way of therapy for you two without feeling like its therapy; and yet, being an encouragement to others with your stories. Thank you both for sharing these vulnerable times in your lives.
Thank you for sharing your story with us. My sister was murdered 4 years ago and you can never quite describe the hole left behind when you loose your older sister🤍 sending you love
Wow, Sarah and Lauren…thank-you SO much for sharing these incredibly personal stories with us! All I could think (besides sympathy for the pain you had experienced) is how lucky your children are to have such loving, strong, smart, emotionally brilliant women in their lives that they get to call their Mom! Take care!
It was so nice that you two had each other during explaining each of your stories ❤️
Thank you for being willing and so open, to share your childhood experiences and memories. It took courage and strength, to be vulnerable about telling the tender moments. I'm honored to hear about them. I come from "a broken home," also. That and losing someone we love, are clubs we wish we weren't a member of. Blessings and Love 10x to you both! 🙏💝💚🙌
Thanks for opening up! Divorce kid who lost her mom 5 years ago. It's tough!
I am so sorry for your los.. sending love to you ❤️❤️
You two are so lucky to have each other the love you have for each other is so sweet. Such a blessing!
Thank you both for sharing. The openness you both have to let others hear what you've been through is amazing and so very helpful. My prayers are with you all. The women you have become, the wives and Mamas of some awesome fellas and adorable children have shown us we too can not only survive but thrive through difficulties within our lives to come out on the other side. And no that doesn't take away the pain, trauma or heartache but it does show that we can overcome and continue to strive for better days. Much love to you both and your beautiful families you have created. ❤
I had a very broken traumatic childhood. My mom groomed me to be promiscuous from age 8+. She hardly paid any attention to me unless it was to tell me explicit sexual things that she was interested in reliving "aloud" to me. Anytime i struggled in school with bully's or feeling outcast, she would ignore me and tell me to talk to the counselor. I felt so unloved and alone growing up. I lost my virginity at 13 searching for love in a boy (my brother's friend who slept over often.) That boy moved in to live in my room with me when i was 14, and i got pregnant on my 15th bday. After which my step dad kicked the boy out and made me take my newborn home alone because "she could get pregnant again..." So i got a job a few months later i as soon as i turned 16 & got a car, got married and got an apartment all within a few months following that. I found out quickly that her dad didn't want to get a job, so i had to get a second job working morning to night, barely seeing my baby. I started skipping work about 6 months in so i could see her more which lost me my main income job. I found out he cheated on me the same week & told her dad i was leaving him, he choked me saying i couldn't. I had my brother's friends come kick him out for me & then moved back into my mom's house around 17yo. I became so depressed for being back there, for losing everything i worked so hard to give my daughter a different life than my mom gave me. I felt defeated and so alone, so i started partying at night while my mom was home incase my daughter woke up. I was running from the depression that i felt at her house. I started dating but noone would stick around long, nothing worked out. I became so desperate for any kind of love that i started going through men quickly, sleeping with most of them just to feel connection for even just a night. I was so deep in depression and sin toward the end of that year that i cried out to a God i didn't know, asking Him to send a man to love me. 3 weeks later i met my now-husband of 10 years, and a month into dating he asked me to church where i heard about Jesus for the first time. Jesus filled my heart with so much love & i felt that empty void of searching was finally filled. God totally changed my life after that, i began to not like the things i enjoyed prior, like drinking and partying. My life has never been the same since! God is so good, that man He sent me was Jesus!
I have cried and laughed along with you both, I lost my younger brother last year and I swear I have cried everyday since August!! There's no way to describe the pain of losing a sibling, the pain is unbearable xxxx
You guys made me cry so hard, because I think everyone has dealt with loss, in some way or another, and I really see myself in most of the topics you talked about. Thank you for sharing♥️
I appreciate you sharing your story , Sarah. I know that was difficult to tell and I’m sure it helped so many people who’ve been through similar experiences.
I'm so sorry for all the trauma that you both have been through. It is easy for us to think your lives are perfect. Thank you for being so open. You have helped so many people in these podcasts. 💚 💗
I buried my mother yesterday. Thankfully there was no trauma involved. She lived a long and happy life. I will miss her the rest of my days but also know I will see her again. There's something about not being able to call your Mom that cuts deep. I pray for peace for both of you. Sarah your sister is with you and always will be. Yes, you will see her again. Lo, I’m happy you have a relationship with your father. We all make mistakes. Love to you both.
Thanks gals for sharing!! I know how hard it is to open up and talk about your family, and what you went through. The healing process is a life time process, but you learn something new from it every time. I wish the best for each of you!! You'll be in my prayers. Lots of love from Argentina!!
thank you for sharing both of y’all’s stories. i’m a child that was caught in the crossfire of multiple affairs but instead my mom stayed. it’s a hard thing to deal with. i found out when i was 8 but didn’t comprehend till 12-13. worst feeling in the world to watch your mom deal with such heartache
I totally relate Lo - no one talks about realisation grief that as an adult you see how things should have been and all of a sudden your are grieving what you missed out on or being treated a certain way years after the fact. Big love ❤
I am sorry for what you went through. I have struggled with this myself. Thankfully, we are generational curse cycle breakers and our children will NOT have to deal with the things we did. Sending you a big virtual hug!
Even tougher when your parents not alive anymore. You have so many things you want to ask, say, understand. Then you’re stuck in a loop of resentment and pity for what they must’ve been going through or has gone through as a kid to behave the way they did
@@Duckduckobtusegoose you hit the nail on the head. Couldn’t have worded it better. God bless you. I hope you have peace and happiness now. So well written❤
Thank you both for sharing♥️ Sarah, you are stronger than you let yourself think you are. I lost my sister a year and a half ago and it feels like it’s been a lifetime. She was 19 at the time and was hit by a charter bus while she was on foot crossing a crosswalk. It was tragic and sudden and we were living in different states so sometimes I wish I could have seen her to say goodbye but hearing your story gives me a different perspective and I realized the last time I saw her was so nice and we had a great time together so it helped me to appreciate that at least. Again, thank you for sharing🙏🏼
Lo - I love how positive you were talking about your dad! That takes so much forgiveness and you can tell you have the grace your mom had! ❤
Sarah - I think I speak for all the followers. We love you 😢❤ I guarantee you make your sis so proud!
My heart is breaking for both of you for the trauma you have both endured . But you have come out to the other side with such amazing positive attitudes. Bless you both. You are not sisters by blood but by heart and soul, embrace it, you are an inspiration to all of us. ❤
I'm so sorry you had to go through this. I lost my Father at 20 suddenly and even now, nearly 23 years later, I still deal with the trauma at times. When you said that it truly changed your family, I so know what you mean.
Sending you big hugs from afar...
💞💞💞💞💞
This episode shed light on some of the things I’ve been subconsciously avoiding and I can now move forward with healing. Thank you both for sharing❤
Sarah, thank you for the courage to share your story with us. I cannot imagine the pain, but you remain such a light ✨ Lo, my parents divorced after 25 years due to infidelity. I resonate so much (even with you feeling like it wasn't a "heavy enough" topic to follow Sarah's). I'm so happy you two have each other ❤ we love you guys!!!
I am sorry. My parents haven’t divorced but my father is continuously unfaithful to my mother. She calls me wanting my opinion on how to handle it and it just breaks my heart. We are not close and they were not great parents, but I love them both. They’re my parents.. I remember wishing they’d get divorced nearly my whole life. I pray my children never feel that way about me and their father.
Thank you both for being so vulnerable. I related to you both in different ways and it’s important to have these conversations so people don’t feel like they’re alone.