for story 3, She said she already got her friend a wedding gift from the registry, they’re asking her to write a $150 check on TOP of that. Which i find kind of strange as a concept in general.
Yea that is insane. I told our wedding party you being in our wedding is our gift please don’t give us anything else. The fact that she got a gift already and they STILL want her to write a check?! I’m sorry no that is insane. The expectations of people are out of control.
Yeah that smells like BS to me. She already GOT a gift - I think Morgan and Alejandra didn’t pick up on it because OP wrote it into the list of things she’d done
I don’t think Morgan and Alejandra actually understood the story. OP had been doing all of that work to make the wedding great for the bride but the bride hasn’t done anything for her bridesmaids? That’s not how it supposed to go.
The woman being mad her friend found her wedding dress in her closet has the same energy as a person angry they were caught cheating because their partner went through their phone.
Exactly. I don’t think it was rash at all. If that were a child you’d call cps immediately. Why not do the same for another living breathing creature capable of love?
story 2: if someone says "i owe you" that means you are paying, it doesnt matter the relationship u have (friendship, relatives, romantic partner, etc). this guy thinking he only has to pay if the woman is his gf/wife is just disgusting and also a gf/wife can pay their own food. this guy sees women in such a horrible way that if i were op i would have left without paying and block him from everything
He's a definite misogynist. Not only did he mislead her but he just sounds like a miserable person. Evidence: he treats women like shit. He trauma dumps all over his 'friend' instead of being normal and going to a therapist and paying them. He then promises his 'friend' a dinner and makes her pay because she's not his girlfriend.
Resturant guy has an unhealthy attachment with OP. So he can pay for "attractive" women but his supposed "bestie" gets nothing and he clearly doesn't care about her financial situation 🤢 gross. She needs to end that friendship. He is using her.
He's dating around because OP is his "wifey-wife". I watched this video of this older lady who made friends with an older man who would talk to her for hours over his dreams, hopes, joys and struggles but one day she realized he didn't even know her name! She asked her older boyfriend and he said the guy sleeps around and had lost contact with all women because they said he turned them into wifely labour repositories and _never_ reciprocated or even just saw them. She was just his newest female victim. OP hasn't been friends for years, she's been "emotional/social/ego wifely duties repository" for years. She needs to get away from him ASAP.
Story 8. He gave his roommate multiple chances to be the dog’s actual owner and take care of her properly, and the roommate straight up refused. He does not need an dog but the dog needs a proper owner. He should’ve stepped up well before the ultimatum. His fault he didn’t take his roommate seriously.
Same. The moment I saw the state of how he left that dog, I would have acted. Better the shelter take it and rehome it than it be neglected and tortured.
For that wedding dress story, I kept waiting for you guys to point out that the friend immediately said “you went through my closet” immediately confirming that she knew EXACTLY where that dress was but refused to give it back. She offered up money quickly as well. I don’t know why she didn’t want to give it back but it was clear she didn’t want to. Not the asshole.
OP might have said i found the dress in your closet… lol and if thats the only place she puts clothes she could assume thats where she looked i think she was too lazy to look and should be happy asf OP found it! she should’ve been offered her friend to look for herself or even better what they suggested getting together one day and cleaning and organizing her closet so they can find the dress. OP sounds like a good friend who would’ve absolutely helped her specially if there was even a small chance she could find the dress that is sooo sentimental and means even more as her sister has yet to wear it and needs it. honestly the friend is shitty asf for doing that yes but do i necessarily think she was trying to steal it? no i dont as she has had it for 2 years and if she wanted to sell it she wouldve wnd its not like she would’ve been able to wear it or even get married in it since it would get recognized of course and what are the chances they wear the exact same size possible but honestly i believe she was being lazy or being passive aggressive bcz she was holding a grudge against op for an unknown reason so didnt bother to put effort into looking. i dont think she was going to sell or wear the dress sure maybe keep it but i doubt it what would be the reason other than to hurt OP and they seem close… again lazy or just holding a grudge so didnt look hard but doubt was that mad she knew where it was and lied
The dress story: it's really sus that the friend claimed she couldn't find the dress anywhere, but immediately knew OP was in her closet when she heard the dress was found. Which is it? You don't know where it is or you do? She told on herself when she got angry instead of excited.
OMG I didn't even think about that... but yes for sure that's what I thought too that she wanted to keep it. I would have taken it and not told her and on the wedding day have been like oh yeah you gave it back to me don't you remember? Or oh yeah I found it I totally forgot to tell you but thank you taking good care of it for me.... LOL
Story 8: I believe there is a stigma around rehoming. Honestly, i believe that there are many animals being abused because people keep giving others chances. If that roommate had given the other roommate another chance, what would have happened? Another day of abuse? I vote NTA.
Exactly. And shelter cages are so much bigger than a crate at home. They are made to be lived in. A pet store crate is made for your dog to nap in, that’s it.
Morgan please do a "splitting the bill/tipping" or basically service industry episode. I'm on a rabbit hole since heybrianajones did that viral Tiktok about someone not paying for her share of the bill and the opinions are baffling.
That sounds like a great theme! This is my hot take: I don't care what "custom" is. I'm not paying a share of someone else's $40 seafood platter when I ordered a $15 fish and chips.
@@victorywalkingtours8843for real. And in this economy? We shouldn’t be shaming our friends for not having cash for fancy dinners. I’ve always had broke friends and we have plenty of fun eating cheap food & going hiking/for a walk. Let’s not add stress to our lives. You shouldn’t have to hustle for the privilege of hanging out with your friends.
Story 4: I’m wondering how the wife thinks they are going to pay for things with an 85% cut in their finances?! Is she ignorant, delusional, or deliberately trying to pick a fight? It’s nothing to do with gender or gender rolls etc. Edit: if the child is 3 there may be some less expensive or free pre-k programs available depending on their location.
I think what Morgan said about feeling insecure is the main thing. I don't think she's really wanting him to stay home, I think she is just upset about something else that she didn't tell him and wanted him to comfort her but he was very confused. And Alejandra hit the nail on the head with the projection.
On story 8, for me, there are no second chances on neglect. Neglect is abuse. There are no excuses for neglecting your dog and good on OP for saving that poor dog from further abuse.
The most telling thing in the wedding dress story for me is OP texted "found the dress" and friend replied "why were you in my closet?" Who said it was in the closet?
A lot is missing from the story. Did OP tell her the emotional significance of the dress and that her sister wanted to wear it too? Did she mention it was in the closet? Honestly I'd be pissed too if I were the friend. Why didn't op ask if they could look again together, or ask her before rummaging through her closet without her consent? If the friend knew how important the dress was and refused to let OP search with her then sure, she's the ass. If not, then she's not.
@@snakeplissken1752 still though if you lost something that you're supposed to be looking after for someone i really think the original owner should be allowed to look fir it themselves if you cant be asked to do it yourself idk
It’s insane to me how much people expect financially from their bridesmaids. In my mind, it’s an honor to ME to have them a part of my day & I don’t expect anything extra from them past spending the day with me. Not extra money ON TOP OF gifts & how much I know they spent on getting their dress/shoes/anything else, especially if there was also a bridesmaids trip like is so popular these days. I offered to pay for my bridesmaids dresses if they needed it & didn’t expect anyone to spend thousands on my wedding day. I was okay if my bridesmaids wore dresses they already owned, as long as it matched colors. These women are my friends & I value them enough to have them with me the day of, that’s all I want from them.
THANK YOU I told our wedding party not to get us anything because then being in the wedding was enough. I got my bridesmaids jewelry and some other small gifts and I got our groomsmen their suspenders. She already got a gift and spent that much already she doesn’t owe them anything else
I’ll also add, I didn’t even expect gifts from my own bridesmaids because I know financial situations are individual and tight. Lots of my friends have weddings where they ask for no gifts at all. I fear so many people have fallen into the capitalist-consumerism energy of weddings.
Just got married in July. Two of my bridesmaids are just starting out in their career so I gave them a gift card to pay for half their dresses. The other girls said they were fine to pay it. All dresses were roughly $100. I told them nude shoes because I knew they all had some. I bought their jewelry for the day. I paid for their hair and makeup. I paid for their bouquets. Even the bachelorette trip I paid for the entire Airbnb because I picked a place I wanted. Never expected any of them to get me a gift.
The last story is so relatable. First time I moved out and into an apartment with a roommate, she wanted a dog to raise into her ESA. We both looked so we knew we both agreed to the dog we got. We got a German shepherd mix who thankfully grew into a small chill version of a German shepherd. She was supposed to be solely my roommates dog but she would dip for days on end without he dog and wasn't training her, used her crate as punishment and kicked her in front of me once. My residency there was shortlived as I quickly learned it was a mistake moving in. She came to me with the odd question of if I'm taking the dog with me. I didn't hesitate and said yes. She flipped out but didn't argue. I left the next morning before she woke up and 7 years later I'm chilling with my dog, Kona, whose been with me through thick and thin. I'm thankful she was there to show me my old roommates true personality and I got out of there before I felt stuck. I wouldn't dream of taking her to a shelter but I totally understand the circumstances because having a dog IS A LOT
I would have done the same thing as the poster, I have three dogs and live for them and used to have a roommate that moved out to get a dog because at the time I told her in no way would I help her care for her dog as I know she would have had me doing all the work. People love leaving all the work for me as I was trained to do it and people take advantage of me.
It would be so hard to return a dog to a shelter. I could never but I imagine experiencing what OP experienced and had to deal with and I would not want to be giving second chances for someone so inconsiderate. I think they did what was best for the dog even though it seems harsh.
One of my best friends (we're a trio) got engaged. She invited us out for a meal- she explained the only bridesmaid was her sister because of the cost, but asked for us to be part of it, help plan it. We did, she asked for nothing in return, we each got a plus one, and she made sure we were thanked, we got a gift for being her besties and we had a song dedicated to our friendship - we took to the floor, had photos, just us three. It wa incredible xxxx
Alejandra I think I speak for us all when I say you are truly iconic and we all love you and your hilarious humour and wit (even if half of us think you’re Lauren sometimes) 😉 So glad this isn’t a goodbye and it’s a see you later but you will be missed until then 🤍
The name thing is so relatable. My name is Jeniece and so very uncommon. I had a 2nd grade teacher who struggled to say my name and said “I am going to call you Jen.” I didn’t fight it since this was my teacher. My mom eventually saw Jen written on a report card (this was in the 80’s when things were hand written) and my mom said “Oh I think you brought home someone else’s report card.” When I told her that my teacher changed my name to Jen because she couldn’t pronounce my name. My mom lost it. She scheduled a meeting with the principal and teacher tell them “if I wanted to name my daughter Jen, I would have. How dare someone call my child by a different name without permission from her parents.”
My name is Kimberly, so not uncommon here at all but I have to BEG people not to immediately shorten it to Kim. I will introduce myself as Kimberly and they say "Hi, Kim"
This is a common problem in communities with POC. Our names are too “hard/unique/exotic” so ppl try to make it easier on themselves. I have a nickname for close friends/fam but everyone else I don’t allow the cop-out. It’s a microagression most of the time.
I hate when that happens, for me it's usually the other way around tho. I tell them my name is Sam and peo immediately think "Samantha". Anyhow, I hade a friend with a name from Balkan. I had such a difficult time with the pronunciation, and she had to help me multiple times before I got it. I never, ever, shortend her name until I came up with a nickname for her on my own, unrelated to her name (that's lowkey my thing). We are no longer friends, but I can still pronounce her name correctly!
Story 8: If you’ve never had a dog or cat you should get an adult or older animal! They’re already through the puppy phase and typically already potty trained so it’s much easier for a new pet owner to adjust to. We got my dog at 3 and she knew some tricks and was potty trained so it was an easy transition!
Wedding story- I would never expect my bridesmaids to pay for their meal after alllllll the stuff they’ve done for me. My bridesmaids paid for their own dresses and shoes and for the Bach party and I was iffy about that. Why make them pay even more?? No way Jose haha
Story 4: I’m due with my first child in a couple weeks and I’d give ANYTHING to be a stay at home mom but financially it would be irresponsible to quit and stay home 😭
story 8: Not the A hole - you can’t live with others and force other ppl to take care of your pet. If that were a child, CPS would be called easily. I think it’s entitled for her to tell someone “you will take care of my dog”. Like girl what?? Lol. They def have that person way more leeway on this than they should’ve
Story 8: OP is not the asshole for taking action to remove the dog from the neglectful owner. Neglecting an pet is very irresponsible! I think some people don’t fully realize animals are living being who have basic needs that HAVE to be met. For dogs, they need food, sleep space, bathroom space/time, exercise, and other enrichment are all important. You can’t slack for a day or two with a pet! The pet is 100% reliant on the owner.
Alejandra we will miss u 😢 You guys are literally my favorite podcast, and I listen to you religiously every Thursday on my way to work. Love you all ❤
I was the MOH at my cousins wedding - they had it in her husbands families backyard, had buns and potato salad for dinner, and the only thing I paid for was my dress which I only had to buy bc I didn’t have anything to wear in my closet. It was the most chill thing ever and my cousin had the BEST day. Girlies - lower your expectations and your day will be incredible!!!!!!
Did nobody pick up on the fact that she immediately asked her friend "why did you go through my closet" which means she knew EXACTLY where it was the entire time!?
Story 8. It’s 100% better that you bring the dog back to the shelter it came from. I’m currently trying to rehome 2 of mine who due to unforeseen circumstances I can’t keep them but all the shelters are full. They recommend I rehome them because they came from a litter from my original dogs so the shelters can’t take them but every shelter I call ask if we got them from them bc they’ll make the room even if there isn’t any.
When you were reading the second story, I was sat there confused, wondering why the OP was mentioning the women that her friend dates and how he pays for them Then he said what he said to OP in the story and it became clear. He was definitely the asshole. He made it sound as if he was taken her to dinner and it was his treat, then he wanted her to pay for herself. That's on top of the fact that she has kids and had to get a babysitter for this and when she's not as well off as him.
My name is Alexandria (I am white) and I am SO glad you found the first story. My name has an “i” in it at the end, so it is pronounced “ria” instead of “ra.” I am dating into a Hispanic & Mexican family. At first, they tried to pronounce my name “Alejandra” and I have had to correct them multiple times. With someone’s NAME, you pronounce it with THEIR pronunciation from THEIR origin! I believe both names are very beautiful ❤
I’m super surprised but totally understand these takes on that story. In my high school and the surrounding schools it was extremely common for Spanish or Latin teachers to give students a name that would fit to the culture they’re learning. I just never felt like it was disrespectful. More just part of learning a different language and culture. But hearing the flip side; I get it
Rescue here! We have in our contract that if they cannot keep an animal for whatever reason they must reach out to us and not rehome. There’s also Facebook DNA (do not adopt) they can post about the owner so no matter where he goes he can’t adopt.
As someone with a different spelling of an American name (its Ukrainian), I would be called everything from K to Krys to Christine to Christina and have gotten so used to it that I would just say "it doesnt matter" when someone would ask if I spell Christina with a K or C cuz how do u then begin to say oh and actually, there's a 'h" and two 'y's instead of 'i's. It made me emotional about Alejandra defending the significance of the correct name. Thank you both
I'm Krista and no one could spell it or say it. I've always been Kristy or Krystal. And the majority of the time, it was spelled with a C. I completely agree with Alejandra that your name is important. As a teacher, I try to learn the correct pronunciation and spelling of my students' names because I understand.
@@katielowery1925 ha, no. Can't imagine can you? I've been Kristy, Krystal, or Kristen. And my middle name is Maria. The a at the end does not exist for most people. I have been called Kristy Marie more often than the name my mother gave me.
Story 2 reminds me of a concept my therapist taught me called Implicit Social Contracts where people have certain unspoken expectations they have for their different relationships and until you make them known to the other person you’re going to harbor resentment when they don’t meet them (even though they don’t know they exist). The guy clearly has some contract where he doesn’t spend money on his girl friends just women he’s dating and she has a contract where if she’s invited out to eat she expects to be treated to the meal (esp with his wording). It could very easily be a miscommunication but those kinds of miscommunications can snowball into major resentment and issues
It almost feels like he invited her out for the sake of friend zoning her. Like he wanted to point out to her he's not paying for dinner because they are "just friends"
jaja leí este comentario antes de mirar el episodio, y me asustó!! creí que ella estaba saliendo completamente. alguien en un otro comentario dijo que no es un adiós, es hasta luego. (mi español no es perfecto pero necesito práctica… disculpas para los errores)
Maybe I misheard the bridesmaids story but she said she got her a gift from the registry. You don’t need to give and gift plus pay for your dinner? That’s ridiculous. If you don’t buy something from the registry I understand the expectation that you give some money (doesn’t have to be $150) in a card. But if her friend expects money plus gifts from everyone that’s insane. EDIT: just made it to the part that confirmed she got her gifts. There is no reason to give extra money.
Big agree with this. It’s insane to me how much people expect from bridesmaids. I guess I just think of bridesmaids in such a different way, that I’m honored to have them with me & don’t expect “thank you” cards or anything extra to “prove” who they are to me. This woman has clearly already spent so much money & it’s weird to see people not understand that?
The panic I would have if I lost my friends dress I would not be able to function until I went through every inch of my house to find it.... Two years?! Literally insane
I feel like I’ve always been able to tell the difference between Alejandra and Lauren. And this episode is making me realize how much they actually sound alike 😭
We actually do sound alike and even I have been confused on videos we have together throughout the years where I try and figure out if it’s me or her 😂 so I really don’t blame y’all
Story 6: I won't have told her I found. I would have took it home and act liked nothing happened. You then can tell your friends character if she asked about it.
Story 3: OP is not the asshole. There's no take that could make me believe she is one. Maybe it's because I'm from a low income family and have always watched my spending habits, but there is no way I could expect that much money from my family and friends to be in my bridal party. As a matter of fact they'd tell me I was out of my goddamn mind. In the story, it does sound like the bride is being greedy. To me there is no reason money should be a barrier to the people you love being a part of your wedding. It's supposed to be a celebration of your marriage not a cash grab.
I had a dog named Jingle (Jingle Bells, officially) for over a decade. I have a memorial tattoo for her. Seemed like she deserves a little shout-out on this episode. 💚 Good luck to Alejandra and Morgan and Justin with the renovations!
THE DRESS STORY HAS AN UPDATE!!!!!! Best friend called cops when sister wore it to her wedding, claimed it was stolen. And apparently she sells vintage clothes as a hobby
Story 8, NTA, he was smart to bring it back to the shelter. The contact often grants co- ownership that allows them to take back the animal without legal ramifications. To just rehome without consent is considered theft in most places
Alejandra is my favorite cohost so I will miss hearing her lovely voice as often, but she sounds excited so I’m excited for her. With love, a fellow Gemini who cannot do math ❤❤
Amazing episode. I’d love if they did an episode on friendship breakups. I’m currently going through one and it’s been a month and still I shed a tear from missing them
1:40:34 for once I’m literally gasping at the take that Alejandra has. That dog was neglected for weeks, not just days and deserves an owner who actually cares about them not just wanting a dog while in college to say they have a dog it seriously makes me angry, thinking someone can just treat an animal that way.
European here! All the wedding stories are soo strange to me. In my country we don't have such a thing as bridesmaid or groomsman. There is only maid of honor and best man. The maid of honor doesn't have that kind of weird responsibilities. Bride do not pay for anyone else outfit, make up or hair. Everyone wear what ever they want as long as it is within dress code (nice, evening outfit). Although in my country it is expected that the guest pay for "their plate" and the amount dependent on relationships so, parents/family pay more than friends. Also we don't really give gifts. I mean you can but it is not expected. We also have cool thing like instead of buying flowers you can get lottery ticket
The real ultimate dog lover here: dream job is LITTERALLY training shelter dogs to be working dogs and adopt them out, and to work with shelter dogs with behavioral issues and get them forever homes!
Alejandra's heart is in the right place, but taking the dog to the shelter was best. Roomie could have offered to foster, but that wouldn't work with the first adopter still living in the home. Contacting the shelter with proof of neglect is the best thing to do, because they have a legally enforceable contract with the adopter. Roomie has no legal right to take away the dog to any random place, it's the shelter that has the right to seize the dog back.
Also, "kill shelters" get such shit, and it's terrible. It really sucks, but the result is the "no kill" shelters pick the "best of the best" and refuse all others. They tend to be private, so there's no law saying they have to take anyone. This leaves the public shelters (that have both a duty to accept any animal and thus must have euthanasia policies) left with the sickest, most aggressive, and/or oldest animals. This leads to them having even higher kill rates, making them look bad, while the "no kill" rescues take credit for curating the most adoptable dogs and often charging higher fees with stricter requirements. The big secret is the unadoptable dogs who get into no kill shelters either get shuffled around forever or eventually get transferred to a kill shelter for someone else to do the dirty work. I know it feels wrong, but preventing the euthanasia of animals with no future prospects has a sort of unintended snowball effect that doesn't really help anyone. We all hate the idea of dogs dying, but there are other options than pressuring shelters to indefinitely keep every dog that no one wants. It's just forcing more dogs to live forever in shelters to make ourselves feel a bit better by saying we support "no kill".
Yall there's this great rescue called GreySave and they take in dogs who were racers in Mexico. They're always looking for adopters and people to foster for them. It worth looking into especially if you want a lazy couch potato dog like a greyhound
For story 3, yes the wedding expectations are out of control. And that was why my partner and I wanted something low maintenance. We didn’t have an engagement party, didn’t do engagement photos, no bridal shower because we had lived together for 2 years, and when it came to the bridesmaid dresses, we offered to pay half because it was 2022/some were still in financial binds from Covid, and we covered the dresses and suits for juniors, ring bearer, and flower girls. I also covered the cost of hair and make up the day of the event. My maid of honor and I had a plan of how to get decorating done/everyone had their own section to work on. Not to mention we also offered an open bar for all guests and the bridal party. And ironically, because we put our friends and family at the forefront of our mind and FOCUSED ON OUR LOVE FOR ONE ANOTHER, it was a great day! Everyone had a good time and no burn out. So honestly y’all, sometimes less is more.
As someone who worked at shelters/rescues, If its a good shelter they will take a dog back no matter what, no questions asked. The same goes for any responsible breeder. Also, not the asshole. This guy has a history of neglecting the dog, it's clearly not a joke. The fact that he got a dog that doesn't fit his lifestyle when otherwise advised to is usually the first red flag. German shepherds are lot of work and energy. OP does not need to give that guy any more warnings, especially coming home and finding the dog in that state. At that point its about the dog's well being, and since it's so young leaving it with the roommate for longer can have some serious psychological consequences.
I absolutely adoreeee Alejandra, I've been an avid THT fan from the beginning and I have ALWAYS been able to tell the difference between her and Lauren. They are both gorgeous gals inside and out but their takes are definitely different and I love the unique perspective they both provide. Good luck with new beginnings Alejandra!!! We will miss you and hope to see you soon 🩷
For the wedding one the comment about the black dress is EXACTLY what I did. I went to a department store had the girls pick out a black dress and then I paid a seamstress to make a red sash to go around the waist of the dress for each bridesmaid so they didn’t have to buy their dresses, and so they could wear the dress again. The sash was removable. We did our own hair and makeup and so the only thing they had to pay for was their shoes which most already had black shoes. We were young and poor so I didn’t expect gifts from anyone!
For the third story: my best friend just got married to her husband, who I am also friends with. I was one of two maids of honor, and spent a TON of money on things for the Bach, bridal shower, ect (for a grad student working part time.) I didn’t tell her about how much I had spent or anything like that until she directly asked me after her bachelorette party because I wanted to do it for her. But when she asked, she did pay me back for some of the stuff which I really appreciated, but she definitely didn’t have to do. She also told me I didn’t have to give them anything for their wedding gift. I still did, but it was something I made, with more sentimental value than monetary I cannot imagine being told that after spending all that money, I still needed to give her more money as a gift … in any situation like that. I think OP would be justified in distancing themselves from this friend
Haven't watched the episode yet, just heard Ale won't be around as much and I'm just 😢 CANNOT wait for youbto embrace the change, sweets. See you soon ❤
As a 2026 bride your guys' points about Story 3 has really helped me. My proposal wasn't extravagant it was private and done in our apartment with just the two of us, like Ale's dad was talking about. I have also been feeling guilty for not making boxes to ask my bridesmaids to be in my wedding but realizing that our parents didnt do that made me realize its not actually that important.
The first story is sooo relatable. My name is Kaydence and I cannot count the amount of times I have introduced myself as Kaydence and people immediately call me Katie. And I'm like um no I just told you my name and that's not it. I also get called Candace and Candance FREQUENTLY and it's hard because I LOVE my name -_-
I've been trying to find more AITA podcasts and you guys are just the only people I've found that are always sensible and respectful. ily guys and good luck with the life changes Alejandra!!
If anyone is looking to adopt a dog, please come to Bakersfield California!! It’s two hours north from LA, our shelters are so over packed, and we have a crisis with people dumping dogs in the orange, orchards or out in the fields. And it’s not hard to adopt here. I believe you just fill out a form and pay the adoption fee.
None of my language teachers ever made us choose a different version of our names. It feels like a weird thing to force onto kids. There's a difference between "If you go to another country, understand that some people may have a hard time pronouncing your name" and "Choose a name that makes it easier for others to say." There's a huge issue in English-speaking countries of not even trying to say names that are from other languages and expecting people from other countries to assimilate and choose an English name and this feels pretty reminiscent of that.
It's not to make it easier for others to say though, it's just an exercise that is commonly practiced in language courses. And not really reminiscent of assimilated names because it's just another English-speaker refusing to participate in cultural exchange.
Also the closest story, it may be a neurodivergent, anxiety, depression, or hoarding issue. Hoarding and depression rooms run in my family. My grandmother was a hoarder and we were not allowed to go in the attic or basement and she refused to let people help her clean it. It was embarrassing for her and made her feel like she was broken. If that’s the case, she’s not mad she went through her stuff. She’s embarrassed that she saw her closet that has gotten out of control. This seems like mental health, not being an asshole.
Most, if not all, shelters make you sign a contract that if you cannot take care of the animal you are legally bound to return the animal to the shelter.
Can I just say I absolutely love your podcast, I’ve been watching for about a month now when you popped up randomly on UA-cam. I’ve been watching ever since. I relate so much! And I feel like I’m sat in the room with you guys, I start giving my take on the story too 😂 ❤
The dog was being neglected. If that wasn't the case, the shelter probably wouldn't have taken it back. I'm glad she did that and I hope that dog has a family that takes care of her now
I struggled with accepting my name growing up. Many would mispronounce it in a way that almost sounded intentional. Until I found its origin & meaning. Giselle is a French name meaning a promise. When I took French in High school, my name was among the examples available for use in class. Because someone else in class chose it, I decided to add Espérance, making my name Promise of Hope ❤ Btw, as a Latina, I loved listening to you explain why we wouldn’t insist on calling anyone anything other than their name. This teacher was on a delusional power trip! 😂
Story 7: it's not laziness, he wants to be babied. I'm almost certain it's a kink. I get the feeling that button hook will go "missing" soon after she gives it to him.
I wonder if it's not a kink but love language? He is asking for too much maybe he just wants to feel like he's being taken care of and just doesn't want to admit it to his wife lol
Kink or love language... just talk about it. I don't know about the kink but just "hey babe my love language is acts of service(?) I'd love it if we could do small things for each other"
@@hilla3353 yeah they definitely need to talk & she needs to really push him as to why he's doing this. If he maintains it's that he needs help then bring up the button hook but if that goes missing it's not a love language thing. I don't think someone would go to this level for a love language but I've heard of people (through friends who dated someone like this) who have had a kink & took it this far. No matter what communication is important & she needs to get to the bottom of this.
Honestly, truly because I enjoy Ale’s take so much and I find her voice the most calming and soothing out of every guest you've ever had I am seriously gonna miss her in this period of time. I literally go out of my way to watch all of her episodes. I wish you well Ale and we're going to miss you! 💕
In second grade my best friend Elizabeth (goes by Liz) was in the same class as another of our friends named Elizabeth (who also went by Liz) forced my friend to go by Beth the entire year so it would be “less confusing”. Every other teacher let both girls go by Liz and just dealt with it, and Beth didn’t stick after that year.
Story 1: As a Spanish speaker in a south american country...We most definitely respect the names of people from other countries. I would not call you Alejandra if your name is Alexandra, and I've met quite a few Alexandras (and many other american sounding names in here), so the teacher didn't even have a valid reason to change her name.
Morgan saying her wedding is going to be low key, and in the same breath wants a carnival and a camel😂😂😂
She means it'll be a big event but on the casual side.
I would want a small event but on the fancy side
@@hcf4kd1992I just had my wedding this month and we went the small but fancy route & I would highly recommend 💗
That describes her so well though 😂
Well, “the economy is bad”, a carnival is low-key compared to what would happen if “the economy was good”
Alejandra unhinged is a fave. Her mom being in the comments might even be just as good 😆 go live your life girl and come back to the show soon 🫶🏼
😊
Story #4: That isn't sexist math. That's just math 😂
for story 3, She said she already got her friend a wedding gift from the registry, they’re asking her to write a $150 check on TOP of that. Which i find kind of strange as a concept in general.
For my wedding I had people give money as a gift, but I also didn’t have a registry. The gift should be money or item from the registry
I caught that too, I would get as frustrated as OP if I already spent so much money and bought gifts from the registry.
Yea that is insane. I told our wedding party you being in our wedding is our gift please don’t give us anything else. The fact that she got a gift already and they STILL want her to write a check?! I’m sorry no that is insane. The expectations of people are out of control.
Yeah that smells like BS to me. She already GOT a gift - I think Morgan and Alejandra didn’t pick up on it because OP wrote it into the list of things she’d done
I don’t think Morgan and Alejandra actually understood the story. OP had been doing all of that work to make the wedding great for the bride but the bride hasn’t done anything for her bridesmaids? That’s not how it supposed to go.
The woman being mad her friend found her wedding dress in her closet has the same energy as a person angry they were caught cheating because their partner went through their phone.
Alejandra wishing you the best on your season of change, but it sucks that we're not gonna see you as much, we're gonna really miss you 😢.
Seriously!! That breaks my heart but I’m so happy for her at the same time! 😭🫶🏽
Story 8. The dog is better of at the shelter then in a cage with no food/water and covered in feces.
Exactly. I don’t think it was rash at all. If that were a child you’d call cps immediately. Why not do the same for another living breathing creature capable of love?
story 2: if someone says "i owe you" that means you are paying, it doesnt matter the relationship u have (friendship, relatives, romantic partner, etc).
this guy thinking he only has to pay if the woman is his gf/wife is just disgusting and also a gf/wife can pay their own food.
this guy sees women in such a horrible way that if i were op i would have left without paying and block him from everything
it makes me wonder is he getting dumb because he feels the same thing I’m not your boyfriend on dates
He's a definite misogynist. Not only did he mislead her but he just sounds like a miserable person. Evidence: he treats women like shit. He trauma dumps all over his 'friend' instead of being normal and going to a therapist and paying them. He then promises his 'friend' a dinner and makes her pay because she's not his girlfriend.
Resturant guy has an unhealthy attachment with OP. So he can pay for "attractive" women but his supposed "bestie" gets nothing and he clearly doesn't care about her financial situation 🤢 gross. She needs to end that friendship. He is using her.
He's dating around because OP is his "wifey-wife".
I watched this video of this older lady who made friends with an older man who would talk to her for hours over his dreams, hopes, joys and struggles but one day she realized he didn't even know her name! She asked her older boyfriend and he said the guy sleeps around and had lost contact with all women because they said he turned them into wifely labour repositories and _never_ reciprocated or even just saw them. She was just his newest female victim.
OP hasn't been friends for years, she's been "emotional/social/ego wifely duties repository" for years. She needs to get away from him ASAP.
@@availanilaYes yes yes yes! He’s treating her like an emotional support woman while he can still date around
Story 8. He gave his roommate multiple chances to be the dog’s actual owner and take care of her properly, and the roommate straight up refused. He does not need an dog but the dog needs a proper owner. He should’ve stepped up well before the ultimatum. His fault he didn’t take his roommate seriously.
Story 8 - I will never give a human being multiple chances to harm an animal. I would have given zero warnings.
Same. The moment I saw the state of how he left that dog, I would have acted. Better the shelter take it and rehome it than it be neglected and tortured.
For that wedding dress story, I kept waiting for you guys to point out that the friend immediately said “you went through my closet” immediately confirming that she knew EXACTLY where that dress was but refused to give it back. She offered up money quickly as well. I don’t know why she didn’t want to give it back but it was clear she didn’t want to. Not the asshole.
OP might have said i found the dress in your closet… lol and if thats the only place she puts clothes she could assume thats where she looked i think she was too lazy to look and should be happy asf OP found it! she should’ve been offered her friend to look for herself or even better what they suggested getting together one day and cleaning and organizing her closet so they can find the dress. OP sounds like a good friend who would’ve absolutely helped her specially if there was even a small chance she could find the dress that is sooo sentimental and means even more as her sister has yet to wear it and needs it. honestly the friend is shitty asf for doing that yes but do i necessarily think she was trying to steal it? no i dont as she has had it for 2 years and if she wanted to sell it she wouldve wnd its not like she would’ve been able to wear it or even get married in it since it would get recognized of course and what are the chances they wear the exact same size possible but honestly i believe she was being lazy or being passive aggressive bcz she was holding a grudge against op for an unknown reason so didnt bother to put effort into looking. i dont think she was going to sell or wear the dress sure maybe keep it but i doubt it what would be the reason other than to hurt OP and they seem close… again lazy or just holding a grudge so didnt look hard but doubt was that mad she knew where it was and lied
Came here to yell that!
Same
I get the feeling she was saving it for a niece or sister or something. She clearly wanted to keep it
“Sis what are you doing? Stay home!!”
I agree Alejandra
The dress story: it's really sus that the friend claimed she couldn't find the dress anywhere, but immediately knew OP was in her closet when she heard the dress was found. Which is it? You don't know where it is or you do? She told on herself when she got angry instead of excited.
Exactly! The friend was going to to keep that dress.
OMG I didn't even think about that... but yes for sure that's what I thought too that she wanted to keep it. I would have taken it and not told her and on the wedding day have been like oh yeah you gave it back to me don't you remember? Or oh yeah I found it I totally forgot to tell you but thank you taking good care of it for me.... LOL
Well, OP could have told the friend that she found it in the closet and just left out that detail in the post
Am I the only one who saw the title and thought Ale as is beer/alcohool beverages😅
I was wondering WTH they made an episode on ale assortments🤣🤣
Same
Same! I came looking for this comment to make sure I wasn't the only one.
Story 8: I believe there is a stigma around rehoming. Honestly, i believe that there are many animals being abused because people keep giving others chances. If that roommate had given the other roommate another chance, what would have happened? Another day of abuse? I vote NTA.
Exactly. And shelter cages are so much bigger than a crate at home. They are made to be lived in. A pet store crate is made for your dog to nap in, that’s it.
Morgan please do a "splitting the bill/tipping" or basically service industry episode. I'm on a rabbit hole since heybrianajones did that viral Tiktok about someone not paying for her share of the bill and the opinions are baffling.
That sounds like a great theme!
This is my hot take: I don't care what "custom" is. I'm not paying a share of someone else's $40 seafood platter when I ordered a $15 fish and chips.
@@victorywalkingtours8843for real. And in this economy? We shouldn’t be shaming our friends for not having cash for fancy dinners. I’ve always had broke friends and we have plenty of fun eating cheap food & going hiking/for a walk. Let’s not add stress to our lives. You shouldn’t have to hustle for the privilege of hanging out with your friends.
Yes!!
YES THIS and retail stories!!!
Tiffany Ferg did a video about this recently!
Story 4: I’m wondering how the wife thinks they are going to pay for things with an 85% cut in their finances?! Is she ignorant, delusional, or deliberately trying to pick a fight? It’s nothing to do with gender or gender rolls etc. Edit: if the child is 3 there may be some less expensive or free pre-k programs available depending on their location.
Vpk is free 4 and up. At least where I live. She would have to stay home for a year. Or day care
I think what Morgan said about feeling insecure is the main thing. I don't think she's really wanting him to stay home, I think she is just upset about something else that she didn't tell him and wanted him to comfort her but he was very confused. And Alejandra hit the nail on the head with the projection.
@@solannyandrea378 I think it’s the same here but some have 3 year olds. It may depend on how close they are to 4 or on the family’s income.
Trying to pick a fight, for sure.
Right? It’s not as if their respective jobs are gender-coded, either.
On story 8, for me, there are no second chances on neglect. Neglect is abuse. There are no excuses for neglecting your dog and good on OP for saving that poor dog from further abuse.
The most telling thing in the wedding dress story for me is OP texted "found the dress" and friend replied "why were you in my closet?" Who said it was in the closet?
Exactlyyyy!!
1000% this
"I don't know where your dress is"
"I found my dress!"
"Why were you in the closet?"
....thought you didn't know where it was
@@leah3801 literally
A lot is missing from the story. Did OP tell her the emotional significance of the dress and that her sister wanted to wear it too?
Did she mention it was in the closet?
Honestly I'd be pissed too if I were the friend. Why didn't op ask if they could look again together, or ask her before rummaging through her closet without her consent? If the friend knew how important the dress was and refused to let OP search with her then sure, she's the ass. If not, then she's not.
@@snakeplissken1752 still though if you lost something that you're supposed to be looking after for someone i really think the original owner should be allowed to look fir it themselves if you cant be asked to do it yourself idk
Awwww I’m going to miss Alejandra. She had me laughing on her take on the story with the wife and the husband on who was going to stay home. 😂
Where’s she going?
@@gracethompson6926 she said she`s super busy life and work and won`t be on the podcast much anymore
It’s insane to me how much people expect financially from their bridesmaids. In my mind, it’s an honor to ME to have them a part of my day & I don’t expect anything extra from them past spending the day with me. Not extra money ON TOP OF gifts & how much I know they spent on getting their dress/shoes/anything else, especially if there was also a bridesmaids trip like is so popular these days. I offered to pay for my bridesmaids dresses if they needed it & didn’t expect anyone to spend thousands on my wedding day. I was okay if my bridesmaids wore dresses they already owned, as long as it matched colors. These women are my friends & I value them enough to have them with me the day of, that’s all I want from them.
exactly! the epidemic of expecting a friend to shell out thousands to just to be in a wedding has always been mind boggling to me.
THANK YOU I told our wedding party not to get us anything because then being in the wedding was enough. I got my bridesmaids jewelry and some other small gifts and I got our groomsmen their suspenders. She already got a gift and spent that much already she doesn’t owe them anything else
I’ll also add, I didn’t even expect gifts from my own bridesmaids because I know financial situations are individual and tight. Lots of my friends have weddings where they ask for no gifts at all. I fear so many people have fallen into the capitalist-consumerism energy of weddings.
Just got married in July. Two of my bridesmaids are just starting out in their career so I gave them a gift card to pay for half their dresses. The other girls said they were fine to pay it. All dresses were roughly $100. I told them nude shoes because I knew they all had some. I bought their jewelry for the day. I paid for their hair and makeup. I paid for their bouquets. Even the bachelorette trip I paid for the entire Airbnb because I picked a place I wanted. Never expected any of them to get me a gift.
The last story is so relatable. First time I moved out and into an apartment with a roommate, she wanted a dog to raise into her ESA. We both looked so we knew we both agreed to the dog we got. We got a German shepherd mix who thankfully grew into a small chill version of a German shepherd. She was supposed to be solely my roommates dog but she would dip for days on end without he dog and wasn't training her, used her crate as punishment and kicked her in front of me once. My residency there was shortlived as I quickly learned it was a mistake moving in. She came to me with the odd question of if I'm taking the dog with me. I didn't hesitate and said yes. She flipped out but didn't argue. I left the next morning before she woke up and 7 years later I'm chilling with my dog, Kona, whose been with me through thick and thin. I'm thankful she was there to show me my old roommates true personality and I got out of there before I felt stuck. I wouldn't dream of taking her to a shelter but I totally understand the circumstances because having a dog IS A LOT
I would have done the same thing as the poster, I have three dogs and live for them and used to have a roommate that moved out to get a dog because at the time I told her in no way would I help her care for her dog as I know she would have had me doing all the work. People love leaving all the work for me as I was trained to do it and people take advantage of me.
It would be so hard to return a dog to a shelter. I could never but I imagine experiencing what OP experienced and had to deal with and I would not want to be giving second chances for someone so inconsiderate. I think they did what was best for the dog even though it seems harsh.
One of my best friends (we're a trio) got engaged. She invited us out for a meal- she explained the only bridesmaid was her sister because of the cost, but asked for us to be part of it, help plan it. We did, she asked for nothing in return, we each got a plus one, and she made sure we were thanked, we got a gift for being her besties and we had a song dedicated to our friendship - we took to the floor, had photos, just us three. It wa incredible xxxx
Alejandra I think I speak for us all when I say you are truly iconic and we all love you and your hilarious humour and wit (even if half of us think you’re Lauren sometimes) 😉 So glad this isn’t a goodbye and it’s a see you later but you will be missed until then 🤍
The name thing is so relatable. My name is Jeniece and so very uncommon. I had a 2nd grade teacher who struggled to say my name and said “I am going to call you Jen.” I didn’t fight it since this was my teacher. My mom eventually saw Jen written on a report card (this was in the 80’s when things were hand written) and my mom said “Oh I think you brought home someone else’s report card.” When I told her that my teacher changed my name to Jen because she couldn’t pronounce my name. My mom lost it. She scheduled a meeting with the principal and teacher tell them “if I wanted to name my daughter Jen, I would have. How dare someone call my child by a different name without permission from her parents.”
My name is Kimberly, so not uncommon here at all but I have to BEG people not to immediately shorten it to Kim. I will introduce myself as Kimberly and they say "Hi, Kim"
This is a common problem in communities with POC. Our names are too “hard/unique/exotic” so ppl try to make it easier on themselves. I have a nickname for close friends/fam but everyone else I don’t allow the cop-out. It’s a microagression most of the time.
I hate when that happens, for me it's usually the other way around tho. I tell them my name is Sam and peo immediately think "Samantha".
Anyhow, I hade a friend with a name from Balkan. I had such a difficult time with the pronunciation, and she had to help me multiple times before I got it. I never, ever, shortend her name until I came up with a nickname for her on my own, unrelated to her name (that's lowkey my thing).
We are no longer friends, but I can still pronounce her name correctly!
Not realy I'm Emma ppl me em, some ppl shorten coz they do it not always a race thing sometimes a lazy thing
@@SammyLammy1D I def give ppl multiple attempts 😆
I totally get it
@story 3: imagine throwing a party for yourself and expecting all of your guests to pay for it??????
Dude. No. The dog was covered in pee and poop. Alejandra, would you want to give someone a second chance if you were treated that way?
Story 8: If you’ve never had a dog or cat you should get an adult or older animal! They’re already through the puppy phase and typically already potty trained so it’s much easier for a new pet owner to adjust to. We got my dog at 3 and she knew some tricks and was potty trained so it was an easy transition!
Wedding story- I would never expect my bridesmaids to pay for their meal after alllllll the stuff they’ve done for me. My bridesmaids paid for their own dresses and shoes and for the Bach party and I was iffy about that. Why make them pay even more?? No way Jose haha
And since the bride won't even pay another $16 for costume jewelry it feels very much like a cash grab.
And she's not allowed a +1, but another has 10?
@@kimberlytl6127 right? Where’s the balance there!?
Story 4: I’m due with my first child in a couple weeks and I’d give ANYTHING to be a stay at home mom but financially it would be irresponsible to quit and stay home 😭
Dude same. Due in May and it would be a DREAM to be able to afford to stay home with our baby.
story 8: Not the A hole - you can’t live with others and force other ppl to take care of your pet. If that were a child, CPS would be called easily. I think it’s entitled for her to tell someone “you will take care of my dog”. Like girl what?? Lol. They def have that person way more leeway on this than they should’ve
Story 8: OP is not the asshole for taking action to remove the dog from the neglectful owner. Neglecting an pet is very irresponsible! I think some people don’t fully realize animals are living being who have basic needs that HAVE to be met. For dogs, they need food, sleep space, bathroom space/time, exercise, and other enrichment are all important. You can’t slack for a day or two with a pet! The pet is 100% reliant on the owner.
Alejandra we will miss u 😢
You guys are literally my favorite podcast, and I listen to you religiously every Thursday on my way to work. Love you all ❤
I was the MOH at my cousins wedding - they had it in her husbands families backyard, had buns and potato salad for dinner, and the only thing I paid for was my dress which I only had to buy bc I didn’t have anything to wear in my closet. It was the most chill thing ever and my cousin had the BEST day. Girlies - lower your expectations and your day will be incredible!!!!!!
Did nobody pick up on the fact that she immediately asked her friend "why did you go through my closet" which means she knew EXACTLY where it was the entire time!?
Story 8. It’s 100% better that you bring the dog back to the shelter it came from. I’m currently trying to rehome 2 of mine who due to unforeseen circumstances I can’t keep them but all the shelters are full. They recommend I rehome them because they came from a litter from my original dogs so the shelters can’t take them but every shelter I call ask if we got them from them bc they’ll make the room even if there isn’t any.
“I’m not a licensed therapist, I know a lot of you were confused” we love you Alejandra lmfao 😭💖
I love how infectious Alejandra's laugh is! It adds so much to the show ❤️
When you were reading the second story, I was sat there confused, wondering why the OP was mentioning the women that her friend dates and how he pays for them Then he said what he said to OP in the story and it became clear. He was definitely the asshole. He made it sound as if he was taken her to dinner and it was his treat, then he wanted her to pay for herself. That's on top of the fact that she has kids and had to get a babysitter for this and when she's not as well off as him.
My name is Alexandria (I am white) and I am SO glad you found the first story. My name has an “i” in it at the end, so it is pronounced “ria” instead of “ra.”
I am dating into a Hispanic & Mexican family. At first, they tried to pronounce my name “Alejandra” and I have had to correct them multiple times. With someone’s NAME, you pronounce it with THEIR pronunciation from THEIR origin! I believe both names are very beautiful ❤
I’m super surprised but totally understand these takes on that story. In my high school and the surrounding schools it was extremely common for Spanish or Latin teachers to give students a name that would fit to the culture they’re learning.
I just never felt like it was disrespectful. More just part of learning a different language and culture. But hearing the flip side; I get it
Rescue here! We have in our contract that if they cannot keep an animal for whatever reason they must reach out to us and not rehome. There’s also Facebook DNA (do not adopt) they can post about the owner so no matter where he goes he can’t adopt.
The scream I scrumpt when I heard low energy adult, and then six month old German Shepherd mix 😰
As someone with a different spelling of an American name (its Ukrainian), I would be called everything from K to Krys to Christine to Christina and have gotten so used to it that I would just say "it doesnt matter" when someone would ask if I spell Christina with a K or C cuz how do u then begin to say oh and actually, there's a 'h" and two 'y's instead of 'i's. It made me emotional about Alejandra defending the significance of the correct name. Thank you both
I'm Krista and no one could spell it or say it. I've always been Kristy or Krystal. And the majority of the time, it was spelled with a C.
I completely agree with Alejandra that your name is important. As a teacher, I try to learn the correct pronunciation and spelling of my students' names because I understand.
People seem to think K names are interchangeable… I’m Katrina but often get called Kristina or Katherine 😒
@@kmrus514no one could say krista?
@@katielowery1925 ha, no. Can't imagine can you?
I've been Kristy, Krystal, or Kristen.
And my middle name is Maria. The a at the end does not exist for most people. I have been called Kristy Marie more often than the name my mother gave me.
Story 2 reminds me of a concept my therapist taught me called Implicit Social Contracts where people have certain unspoken expectations they have for their different relationships and until you make them known to the other person you’re going to harbor resentment when they don’t meet them (even though they don’t know they exist). The guy clearly has some contract where he doesn’t spend money on his girl friends just women he’s dating and she has a contract where if she’s invited out to eat she expects to be treated to the meal (esp with his wording). It could very easily be a miscommunication but those kinds of miscommunications can snowball into major resentment and issues
It almost feels like he invited her out for the sake of friend zoning her. Like he wanted to point out to her he's not paying for dinner because they are "just friends"
Voy a extrañar mucho a Alejandra 😭 cuídate mucho y espero que todo salga muy bien para ti ❤
Great episode btw haha
jaja leí este comentario antes de mirar el episodio, y me asustó!! creí que ella estaba saliendo completamente. alguien en un otro comentario dijo que no es un adiós, es hasta luego. (mi español no es perfecto pero necesito práctica… disculpas para los errores)
Maybe I misheard the bridesmaids story but she said she got her a gift from the registry. You don’t need to give and gift plus pay for your dinner? That’s ridiculous. If you don’t buy something from the registry I understand the expectation that you give some money (doesn’t have to be $150) in a card. But if her friend expects money plus gifts from everyone that’s insane.
EDIT: just made it to the part that confirmed she got her gifts. There is no reason to give extra money.
Big agree with this. It’s insane to me how much people expect from bridesmaids. I guess I just think of bridesmaids in such a different way, that I’m honored to have them with me & don’t expect “thank you” cards or anything extra to “prove” who they are to me. This woman has clearly already spent so much money & it’s weird to see people not understand that?
I heard that too. Also, is the bridesmaid with the plus 10 paying $1500? It seems like a weird request/requirement.
I think it would be ALÉ
Cause Ale is a beer lol
Love tht hope yall are good!
Lol I thought the same 😂
Fully thought the title was talking about beer 😂
The panic I would have if I lost my friends dress I would not be able to function until I went through every inch of my house to find it.... Two years?! Literally insane
I feel like I’ve always been able to tell the difference between Alejandra and Lauren. And this episode is making me realize how much they actually sound alike 😭
We actually do sound alike and even I have been confused on videos we have together throughout the years where I try and figure out if it’s me or her 😂 so I really don’t blame y’all
Story 6: I won't have told her I found. I would have took it home and act liked nothing happened. You then can tell your friends character if she asked about it.
Story 3: OP is not the asshole. There's no take that could make me believe she is one. Maybe it's because I'm from a low income family and have always watched my spending habits, but there is no way I could expect that much money from my family and friends to be in my bridal party. As a matter of fact they'd tell me I was out of my goddamn mind. In the story, it does sound like the bride is being greedy. To me there is no reason money should be a barrier to the people you love being a part of your wedding. It's supposed to be a celebration of your marriage not a cash grab.
Yes & why wasn't she allowed a +1, when another had over 10!
That didn't even blip their radar.
I had a dog named Jingle (Jingle Bells, officially) for over a decade. I have a memorial tattoo for her. Seemed like she deserves a little shout-out on this episode. 💚
Good luck to Alejandra and Morgan and Justin with the renovations!
THE DRESS STORY HAS AN UPDATE!!!!!! Best friend called cops when sister wore it to her wedding, claimed it was stolen. And apparently she sells vintage clothes as a hobby
OMG I can't find it
Where is the update ??? Please help
I just went to the post and there was no update.
WHOA
That's so much worse than I thought...
If you're gonna claim there's an update, it's better if you share a link. The update is not on oop's page or on the original post.
I REALLY LOVE IT when Alejandra pops off :D specially in the 4th story.
Story 8, NTA, he was smart to bring it back to the shelter. The contact often grants co- ownership that allows them to take back the animal without legal ramifications. To just rehome without consent is considered theft in most places
Alejandra is my favorite cohost so I will miss hearing her lovely voice as often, but she sounds excited so I’m excited for her. With love, a fellow Gemini who cannot do math ❤❤
Hot take story 6: Or she knew where the dress was the whole time and didn't want them to have it.
Morgan immediately screaming for the stress rock sent me 😂
Morgan has the cutest laugh on earth gets me every time 🥺🫶
Amazing episode. I’d love if they did an episode on friendship breakups. I’m currently going through one and it’s been a month and still I shed a tear from missing them
1:40:34 for once I’m literally gasping at the take that Alejandra has. That dog was neglected for weeks, not just days and deserves an owner who actually cares about them not just wanting a dog while in college to say they have a dog it seriously makes me angry, thinking someone can just treat an animal that way.
same i usually only listen on spotify but i was so shocked by her take i had to come check the comments
I absolutely adore Alejandra
European here! All the wedding stories are soo strange to me. In my country we don't have such a thing as bridesmaid or groomsman. There is only maid of honor and best man. The maid of honor doesn't have that kind of weird responsibilities. Bride do not pay for anyone else outfit, make up or hair. Everyone wear what ever they want as long as it is within dress code (nice, evening outfit). Although in my country it is expected that the guest pay for "their plate" and the amount dependent on relationships so, parents/family pay more than friends. Also we don't really give gifts. I mean you can but it is not expected. We also have cool thing like instead of buying flowers you can get lottery ticket
the friend in the wedding dress story was 100% trying to keep it
The real ultimate dog lover here: dream job is LITTERALLY training shelter dogs to be working dogs and adopt them out, and to work with shelter dogs with behavioral issues and get them forever homes!
“I’m scared you’re going to throw that rock at me” 😂😂😂😂😂
my siri went off and did the math question when yall said that 😂
I’m just glad it’s a see you later and not a goodbye 😭 Live your best life Alejandra! ❤️
Alejandra's heart is in the right place, but taking the dog to the shelter was best. Roomie could have offered to foster, but that wouldn't work with the first adopter still living in the home. Contacting the shelter with proof of neglect is the best thing to do, because they have a legally enforceable contract with the adopter. Roomie has no legal right to take away the dog to any random place, it's the shelter that has the right to seize the dog back.
Also, "kill shelters" get such shit, and it's terrible. It really sucks, but the result is the "no kill" shelters pick the "best of the best" and refuse all others. They tend to be private, so there's no law saying they have to take anyone. This leaves the public shelters (that have both a duty to accept any animal and thus must have euthanasia policies) left with the sickest, most aggressive, and/or oldest animals. This leads to them having even higher kill rates, making them look bad, while the "no kill" rescues take credit for curating the most adoptable dogs and often charging higher fees with stricter requirements. The big secret is the unadoptable dogs who get into no kill shelters either get shuffled around forever or eventually get transferred to a kill shelter for someone else to do the dirty work.
I know it feels wrong, but preventing the euthanasia of animals with no future prospects has a sort of unintended snowball effect that doesn't really help anyone. We all hate the idea of dogs dying, but there are other options than pressuring shelters to indefinitely keep every dog that no one wants. It's just forcing more dogs to live forever in shelters to make ourselves feel a bit better by saying we support "no kill".
Yall there's this great rescue called GreySave and they take in dogs who were racers in Mexico. They're always looking for adopters and people to foster for them. It worth looking into especially if you want a lazy couch potato dog like a greyhound
For story 3, yes the wedding expectations are out of control. And that was why my partner and I wanted something low maintenance. We didn’t have an engagement party, didn’t do engagement photos, no bridal shower because we had lived together for 2 years, and when it came to the bridesmaid dresses, we offered to pay half because it was 2022/some were still in financial binds from Covid, and we covered the dresses and suits for juniors, ring bearer, and flower girls. I also covered the cost of hair and make up the day of the event. My maid of honor and I had a plan of how to get decorating done/everyone had their own section to work on. Not to mention we also offered an open bar for all guests and the bridal party. And ironically, because we put our friends and family at the forefront of our mind and FOCUSED ON OUR LOVE FOR ONE ANOTHER, it was a great day! Everyone had a good time and no burn out. So honestly y’all, sometimes less is more.
i’m going to miss alejandra so much :((
As someone who worked at shelters/rescues, If its a good shelter they will take a dog back no matter what, no questions asked. The same goes for any responsible breeder. Also, not the asshole. This guy has a history of neglecting the dog, it's clearly not a joke. The fact that he got a dog that doesn't fit his lifestyle when otherwise advised to is usually the first red flag. German shepherds are lot of work and energy. OP does not need to give that guy any more warnings, especially coming home and finding the dog in that state. At that point its about the dog's well being, and since it's so young leaving it with the roommate for longer can have some serious psychological consequences.
I absolutely adoreeee Alejandra, I've been an avid THT fan from the beginning and I have ALWAYS been able to tell the difference between her and Lauren. They are both gorgeous gals inside and out but their takes are definitely different and I love the unique perspective they both provide. Good luck with new beginnings Alejandra!!! We will miss you and hope to see you soon 🩷
Morgan crying for everything is literally meeee😂😂😂 I feel u girl. Happy cry, sad cry, laughing cry, excited cry… all of the above!🤍
NINE MINS AGO?!? HEY YOU GUYS!! keep up the good work! Ur doing great! Love seeing ale on the episode !
I grew up in Mexico and Alexandra is a common name there too, there was no reason to change it.
For the wedding one the comment about the black dress is EXACTLY what I did. I went to a department store had the girls pick out a black dress and then I paid a seamstress to make a red sash to go around the waist of the dress for each bridesmaid so they didn’t have to buy their dresses, and so they could wear the dress again. The sash was removable. We did our own hair and makeup and so the only thing they had to pay for was their shoes which most already had black shoes. We were young and poor so I didn’t expect gifts from anyone!
For the third story: my best friend just got married to her husband, who I am also friends with. I was one of two maids of honor, and spent a TON of money on things for the Bach, bridal shower, ect (for a grad student working part time.) I didn’t tell her about how much I had spent or anything like that until she directly asked me after her bachelorette party because I wanted to do it for her. But when she asked, she did pay me back for some of the stuff which I really appreciated, but she definitely didn’t have to do. She also told me I didn’t have to give them anything for their wedding gift. I still did, but it was something I made, with more sentimental value than monetary
I cannot imagine being told that after spending all that money, I still needed to give her more money as a gift … in any situation like that. I think OP would be justified in distancing themselves from this friend
I relate so hard to the first story. I have been used as a free therapist so many times.
Haven't watched the episode yet, just heard Ale won't be around as much and I'm just 😢 CANNOT wait for youbto embrace the change, sweets. See you soon ❤
As a 2026 bride your guys' points about Story 3 has really helped me. My proposal wasn't extravagant it was private and done in our apartment with just the two of us, like Ale's dad was talking about. I have also been feeling guilty for not making boxes to ask my bridesmaids to be in my wedding but realizing that our parents didnt do that made me realize its not actually that important.
The first story is sooo relatable. My name is Kaydence and I cannot count the amount of times I have introduced myself as Kaydence and people immediately call me Katie. And I'm like um no I just told you my name and that's not it. I also get called Candace and Candance FREQUENTLY and it's hard because I LOVE my name -_-
i just realised Alejandra has a huge santa doll behind her 😂😂😂😂 my hand was covering that part of the screen
I've been trying to find more AITA podcasts and you guys are just the only people I've found that are always sensible and respectful. ily guys and good luck with the life changes Alejandra!!
If anyone is looking to adopt a dog, please come to Bakersfield California!! It’s two hours north from LA, our shelters are so over packed, and we have a crisis with people dumping dogs in the orange, orchards or out in the fields. And it’s not hard to adopt here. I believe you just fill out a form and pay the adoption fee.
None of my language teachers ever made us choose a different version of our names. It feels like a weird thing to force onto kids. There's a difference between "If you go to another country, understand that some people may have a hard time pronouncing your name" and "Choose a name that makes it easier for others to say." There's a huge issue in English-speaking countries of not even trying to say names that are from other languages and expecting people from other countries to assimilate and choose an English name and this feels pretty reminiscent of that.
It's not to make it easier for others to say though, it's just an exercise that is commonly practiced in language courses. And not really reminiscent of assimilated names because it's just another English-speaker refusing to participate in cultural exchange.
i had one in third grade. in middle school we had to pick from a list of “spanish names” to be called for the whole year
Also the closest story, it may be a neurodivergent, anxiety, depression, or hoarding issue. Hoarding and depression rooms run in my family. My grandmother was a hoarder and we were not allowed to go in the attic or basement and she refused to let people help her clean it. It was embarrassing for her and made her feel like she was broken. If that’s the case, she’s not mad she went through her stuff. She’s embarrassed that she saw her closet that has gotten out of control. This seems like mental health, not being an asshole.
Agreed
Most, if not all, shelters make you sign a contract that if you cannot take care of the animal you are legally bound to return the animal to the shelter.
Can I just say I absolutely love your podcast, I’ve been watching for about a month now when you popped up randomly on UA-cam. I’ve been watching ever since. I relate so much! And I feel like I’m sat in the room with you guys, I start giving my take on the story too 😂 ❤
I wonder if something happened over dinner that made him feel like he needed to draw a line? Because him treating her was definitely initially implied
OMGGGG ALEJANDRA'S FAMILY IS FROM PERU??? awwww i love that! I didn't even expect that as a fellow peruvian ❤
ahhh yes my mom was born and raised in Lima
The dog was being neglected. If that wasn't the case, the shelter probably wouldn't have taken it back. I'm glad she did that and I hope that dog has a family that takes care of her now
I struggled with accepting my name growing up. Many would mispronounce it in a way that almost sounded intentional. Until I found its origin & meaning. Giselle is a French name meaning a promise. When I took French in High school, my name was among the examples available for use in class. Because someone else in class chose it, I decided to add Espérance, making my name Promise of Hope ❤
Btw, as a Latina, I loved listening to you explain why we wouldn’t insist on calling anyone anything other than their name. This teacher was on a delusional power trip! 😂
Story 7: it's not laziness, he wants to be babied. I'm almost certain it's a kink. I get the feeling that button hook will go "missing" soon after she gives it to him.
I wonder if it's not a kink but love language? He is asking for too much maybe he just wants to feel like he's being taken care of and just doesn't want to admit it to his wife lol
Kink or love language... just talk about it. I don't know about the kink but just "hey babe my love language is acts of service(?) I'd love it if we could do small things for each other"
@hilla3353 yeah idk how long they've been married but ignoring it isn't gonna help so the only healthy thing is to talk about.
@@hilla3353 yeah they definitely need to talk & she needs to really push him as to why he's doing this. If he maintains it's that he needs help then bring up the button hook but if that goes missing it's not a love language thing. I don't think someone would go to this level for a love language but I've heard of people (through friends who dated someone like this) who have had a kink & took it this far. No matter what communication is important & she needs to get to the bottom of this.
@@catT5236 yeah it sounds more like a kink but I though it was more appropriate to write the love language example 😅,
Honestly, truly because I enjoy Ale’s take so much and I find her voice the most calming and soothing out of every guest you've ever had I am seriously gonna miss her in this period of time. I literally go out of my way to watch all of her episodes. I wish you well Ale and we're going to miss you! 💕
Had to shout out LA Love and Leashes on here! I adopted my little girl from this rescue, and she has brought so much joy to me and my family. ❤❤❤❤
In second grade my best friend Elizabeth (goes by Liz) was in the same class as another of our friends named Elizabeth (who also went by Liz) forced my friend to go by Beth the entire year so it would be “less confusing”. Every other teacher let both girls go by Liz and just dealt with it, and Beth didn’t stick after that year.
Story 1: As a Spanish speaker in a south american country...We most definitely respect the names of people from other countries. I would not call you Alejandra if your name is Alexandra, and I've met quite a few Alexandras (and many other american sounding names in here), so the teacher didn't even have a valid reason to change her name.