In story6, I never understood the notion of that a woman has to go through childbirth with pain to “bond” with the child but men don’t go through the pain but can bond perfectly with the child
Right? I'm pretty sure skin to skin contact soon after birth is way more important to the parents and baby, since they don't have consciousness they're out of the womb for like 5-7 months.
This! My mom tried to go unmedicated for all of me and my siblings (4 of us) and my little brother who was the last she did successfully do it unmedicated and she told me she wished she went through with the epidural because she was in too much pain to even care about my brother lol. I will never forget the agony she was in while giving birth to my brother. She always told me even with the epidural only taking to one side, she’d do that any day over unmedicated because it makes you less uncomfortable and thus makes birth enjoyable.
@@emmajay2401 Babies definitely know they're outside the womb lol. That's why their sleep patterns are all messed up for months and why so many of them have "colic" a lot of doctors now call that PAS or Poor Adjustment Syndrome. They're having trouble adjusting to life outside the womb. It's also why swaddling (although now determined to be unsafe) helps them sleep. Being securely wrapped up reminds them of being in the womb and helps them relax.
@Ilikefrogs.. I didn't say they didn't know they're outside of the womb. I said they dont have consciousness, meaning they don't know they're not ma extension of their parents till the 5 to 6th mark. I just worded it weird.
Even if I was okay with my partner buying his ex a house, I would NOT be okay with it until we knew for certain why she broke the divorce decree and sold the last house.
In the first story that lady is an asshole and I can see why the kids don’t like her, I don’t think she tried at all and to just expect the kids to move out the second they turn 18 is insane.. I don’t think their marriage is going to last long honestly. Everyone’s the asshole but she’s a bitch
What's also weird and I checks is the house was paid off so she didn't have a mortgage and he was paying her alamoni, and child's part more than the courts would have made him. She didn't have to work. Why would you sell that house?
for story 7, there is a lesbian couple in norway that had a kid recently. Cam was the bio mom, her egg was used, and Julie, carried and gave birth to the baby. they felt like even tho the baby technically isn't biologically related to Julie, she still had a connection to them because she carried him.
plus she did a video on her birth experience, and someone put in the comments on one of their videos where she said she was sad she wouldn't have a genetic link to the baby, that actually fingerprints are created in the womb when baby is moving around, so that comes from her and not Cam, which was a very sweet comment I thought.
This is what happened with my MIL and FIL. She cheated and got EVERY.SINGLE.THING My husband was 14 when they divorced and he's 40 now and my FIL is just now, finally financially recovered. I don't understand, SHE WAS THE PROBLEM
My first delivery, I had a 9lb 10 oz baby and with him came a 4th degree tear. I am 5’3, 110lbs. Second baby, I tore up through my urethra. He can Stfu. Coach my ass. I’d kick him off the cheer team at this point.
And yet she's the one lamenting her sister's bullying. Something tells me she's a liar and the bully of the two. Especially with how gracefully her sister is handling her BS.
@@availanila Exactly. I don't buy the stuff she said about her sister. The stuff she only said after she began getting hate and called out. She's going on about how her sister is jealous. No, I'd say she's more uncomfortable and hurt than anything, maybe a bit angry as well considering what her ex and OP's new boyfriend did to her.
I was suprized they didn't mention that in the opinions part. Luke. That's absolutely INSANE to me. Woman is delulu, people will catch on amd she won't have anyone left besides family having on by a thread,
Story 6 - You don't get a trophy for giving birth without pain meds. If you want to have the full unadulterated experience, good for you... But there is nothing wrong with getting an epidural and you shouldn't force someone to do it your way. ESPECIALLY if you're a guy who will never experience childbirth.
The only people who say “you don’t get a trophy” are the people who haven’t done it and for some reason like to try and make mothers who have feel bad about it.
@@van2165spoken like somebody who is uneducated on the subject. Many women do it because the drugs can lower baby’s heart rate then leading to emergency C-section and other complications. The information is out there for you to educate yourself. My baby’s safety is #1 priority over any pain I may feel. But if you want to take the risks then that’s your choice but don’t dog the women who are able to do it, be confident in your choice without having to say other women don’t get a trophy. It comes off as insecure with the choices you made.
My sister dated my ex. He did it to make me jealous so as soon as he realized I didn't care he lost interest in her and cheated on her. I'd be careful if I were that girl.
No seriously! They were family sooo NOPE I don’t think I could see any of my family members exs romantically. Specially my sister even if it’s a half sibling.
I’m sure others have shared this too but I’m regards to story 6, as a mother who gave birth with an epidural, I was not “doped up” I just couldn’t feel my legs. I remember every moment of our sons birth, I felt every second of his first moments of life with the intensity and passion that this OP thinks his wife would feel while unmedicated. In fact, I believe I felt this even stronger because I wasn’t going through the most intense pain I’ve ever felt.
THIS COMMENT YESS! I also had an epidural, technically was put up on two types of meds, and it did not affect my memory, how alert i was, and even further it did not affect my baby's health in any way. You know what did affect my alertness? Exhaustion. If a mama is too tired / too in pain to push, it puts both the baby and mother at higher risk. I'm not saying one path or the other is better. i'm saying leave that decision to the person who's going to be putting in the work. Period.
@@R3vvv yes exactly!!! And thank you for saying that about choice, I also do not judge anyone for whatever choice they make for their birth experience.
I agree completely! After 30 hrs of active labor I was wayyy more out of it before I got my epidural and likely would have needed an emergency c-section if I hadn’t opted for an epidural and pitocin.
EXACTLY. When I had my 1st son, I went thru full on back labor but never dilated so no epidural. I begged for a C-section (after 3am to 2pm labor) + by the time I got the spinal, which I barely felt, I was so exhausted I couldn’t enjoy my newborn’s birth. It took days to feel up to spending time w/him. Alternatively, my 2nd son was a planned C-section (or there’d BE no 2nd pregnancy) and it was a pleasant experience that I fully enjoyed and got to hold my son right away, agony + exhaustion free. It is still the happiest moment of my entire life.
I had a 28 hour labour and two epidurals. I started in the bath, but then got exhausted as I stopped dilating for ten hours. I could move totally normally, could feel everything normally, just had less pain and could sleep through the start of it. By the time I was ready for pushing the baby out, most of my feeling had returned - but pushing out wasn't nearly as painful as the dilation phase.
Story 1: IMO she is definitely NTA, it is not an "everyone sucks here" situation. 1. What happened to the money from the fully paid-off house? 2. No, the children aren't homeless, they have 2 houses. The husband needs to think about the future of ALL his kids and needs to figure out what happened to the money and if his ex is a good fit to be a full-time parent. Life moves on and while her husband is responsible for all his kids, he is not fully responsible for his ex.
Fr. In what world is that EVER acceptable and HOW are the kids homeless when they have 2 households they could be at. And honestly it sounds like the KIDS are the ones making it miserable because they refuse to accept that their mother caused the split. Not op.
@@shelby_button This. I get that ur parents splitting up and one remarrying can be hard, but unless one (step)parent is genuinely a bad person, they should still be respectful. Your parents being divorced isn't a free pass to act like entitled brats or be disrespectful.
The only thing that would influence this for me is how old the other kids are. If they're 14+, she's absolutely NTH. But if they're much younger than that, I do think she's a tiny bit of an asshole. In that case, I would hope she would have the empathy to see that they don't know any better, are going through hard transitions, and that their mom has manipulated them into acting how they do. I wish she wasn't so closed off to the idea of someday having a good relationship with them, because their mom sounds like a piece of work who definitely influenced the way they treat her. Yes, the things they said were awful, but they still have the time and ability to realize that and become good people. And they could really use another parent/supporter in that time that's actually stable.
Unfortunately, OP's last few comments were downvoted hundreds of times and piled on in replies insulting her and calling her a liar...so, there probably won't be an update.😢
Story 4: I wish it were that easy for females to break up with their partners without facing violence. My sister was murdered in January of 2023, by the person she was dating at the time. I don’t know the exact reason as to “why” he killed her,nor will it ever change anything for me. But I believe that she was trying to desperately end it between them. One of my assumptions are, he couldn’t take no for an answer. 💔 Ladies please be careful out there.
I’m so sorry for your loss. It’s so easy for outside people to say just leave but that is the most dangerous time for most women in abusive relationships. I pray he’s facing justice.
Oh no :( My twin brother just died, and no matter how it happens, its horrible. It must be even worse when it's a violent person that did it purposefully.
i have a feeling that even if she’d reported him for se-ual harassment she still wouldn’t have been taken seriously and he wouldn’t have been arrested. it’s scary to think that he ended up doing something so horrific and those BIG RED FLAGS get downplayed because it’s so common for men to do sick things like send unsolicited n00ds. I think the idea that “just because something is common doesn’t mean it should be normalised” should be so much more prevalent
Wasn’t the husband’s friend that was there when he tried to s@x assault her, a cop? That part confuses me because he could have arrested him ring then and there.
Story 6: What does that even mean “doped up”?! Giving birth the first time is scary. Once I had really strong contractions I asked for an epidural. I has very relaxed and less nervous. I gave birth to a healthy baby boy. I hope she does whatever she wants with the mother in law “pride” bullshit.
@@availanila Exactly! He wants to push this agenda of having him and his wife to have a closer bond than actually focusing on what his wife wants. She’s scared! That last thing she wants is to appease him and his mom during BIRTH. Like wtf ?!
He's clearly oblivious to the fact that when you're giving birth, you become a different person. You are an animal, you make sounds you don't even know how you made. You aren't capable of thinking of anything other than the pain, even with a good epidural!
As someone who just had a water birth with no epidural, I did have laughing gas but TRUST ME I was not laughing lol. It definitely still hurts and you definitely still feel everything. The laughing gas just helps you control your breathing. It’s definitely not helpful with the pain! 😢 sorry to burst your bubble just want you to be aware
@@TwoHotTakesnot everyone is the same- and the level that they give you matters as well. If you’re still in a lot of pain, you can and should advocate for yourself and say you need them to turn it up. My friend did the nitrous and she said it helped tremendously with the pain, almost to the point that it was non-existent. Everyone is different, don’t let this deter you!
@@TwoHotTakes I work at an Oral Surgery office and we give it to patients…it’s not that it helps with pain no, but it does help you sort of handle the experience better, you able to stay calm more easily, which can sort of psychologically help you interpret things as less painful/uncomfortable
For Story Number 7: her body, her choice. Sorry not sorry. If she doesn’t want to carry essentially what would be YOUR sibling, the conversation ends there. Also, I always get a little concerned when couples say that the child has to be genetically related to them. Family is more than genetics. It’s the connections you make and the memories you share. I don’t think it should matter. If you really do want kids, genetics shouldn’t matter. Having a kid is an experience and a child shouldn’t be put on this earth just to carry on your genetics. Adoption, if you have that ability and access (which it sounds like they do based on the story) is totally valid. OP is kind of giving me the ick/weird vibes. I don’t like it.
OH I JUST HEARD THE WHOLE THING AND IT GOT WORSE. “I wouldn’t feel connected to a baby that wasn’t genetically mine.” So you DO just want a kid to carry on the family line. That is so gross. That is so weird to me that you want to have a kid just so they essentially do a job for you. If 0P wanted to legitimately be a parent for the sake of being a parent, they should be able to commit to loving any child that enters into their life, no matter how that opportunity presents itself. The focus on gEneTicS is so friggin WEIRD. A child is not a group project where you bring your own materials. This is a living breathing human being. I honestly hope the fiancé leaves. OP doesn't care about their body autonomy or their opinion. And if things like this are becoming an issue before they get married, it’s gonna get worse after the wedding.
“I don’t think i could love a child I wasn’t biologically related to” is so upsetting for me to hear. I literally can’t even comprehend it. I’ve heard other people say similar things. It always fucks me up just spiraling trying to make sense of it. I don’t want to give birth ever, but I would do everything in my power to keep a child safe and loved. How is that not human nature? That person should not have kids bc as soon as that kid develops their own personality she’s gonna claim they don’t love her anymore.
yeah the whole “has to be biologically related” is a red flag. the fact that she wouldn’t be able to bond with a child unless they are related is just sad
as an adoptee, if someone doesn’t want to raise a child who genetically isn’t related to them, they shouldn’t and no one should try to guilt trip them into changing their mind or bash them. it’s not a red flag imo because adoption to complete strangers is fairly new, unnatural, especially wet womb adoption which would most likely be the case here, and causes damage. that baby would be unable to bond as well (because they literally can’t) but that’s clearly not a topic of discussion when y’all are demonizing op for being honest. with other animals, the young are raised by members of their own community if there’s a reason they can’t be raised by their biological parents, but paying for another person is strictly human and odd. especially because the people being adopted are hardly ever truly the focus. it’s clear based on this discussion. but everything about children should be child centered and adoption is just not that. adopted children have higher rates of abuse, being re-homed like they’re animals, and adoption is inherently traumatic. adoption should not be a family building tool, it should not be thrown around casually when it takes lives, families, lineage, history, and more. the history of adoption is based in human trafficking anyway and the laws aren’t that great, so idk why you want to make people feel bad for dismissing the idea, no matter the reason. children should not be an industry and as a queer person, it’s very sad to see prospective adoptive parents fed lies that they can just adopt when it’s not that simple. adoption requires trauma and it’s perfectly fine to not want to do that to another human being when you may not be fit to bond. it’s actually odd that this is seen as a negative or a red flag, because it’s not just about living a child that isn’t yours and if you can’t even do that then good on op for knowing their limits. the person that would suffer most from a situation like this would be the child, but again, they’re not the focus here when they should be. it’s so easy for kept people to say these “family is more than genetics” stuff because they don’t have to live with the effects of it
It’s hard to divorce. I posted “who tf did I marry” on Reddit and my husband found it. And said I lied about it. He then told me if I can’t deal with “abuse” to leave and “why should he care about his daughter if he’s never going to see her” I’m almost 20 weeks pregnant and officially fed up. It’s scary to leave but it’s scarier what he can do to me. Grateful for this podcast.
Hey, I just wanted to offer the suggestion that if you go to ANY appointment like to a doctor or vet do your best to get a small note out for help. They are trained to deal with those situations. Write it the bottom of any forms you need to fill out or a piece of napkin if you need to give a urine sample. There are people out there who will want to help you but, it won't be an easy journey. If possible get important documents and money set aside so he can't get to them.
Sounds very scary. I used to have an abusive ex, getting out was scary. After that I have met lots of great caring men as friends and bfs and now a husband. It's so great coming home and feel safe and happy, year after year, no matter what the problems!
Story 6: For any man that thinks an epidural takes away all pain, I still felt pain while pushing with both my kids. It definitely eased the pain of the contractions and allowed me to rest, but come go time it hurt. Also, I was in no way doped up and was able to fully bond with my babies after. I just couldn’t stand on my own for a few hours.
The fact that mean need a parade if they stub their toe, it’s just so infuriating when they think they can tell women a dammed thing about their body and how they feel
Story #3 is insane, anyone who dates a siblings ex is just a mess. There's no amount of money anymore would pay me to date my siblings ex especially a ex husband WITH A CHILD, your niece/nephew!?!
Yesterday at work I heard a coworker say she knew someone whos husband does things wrong on purpose so he doesn't have to do them anymore and I said that was weaponized incompetance and nobody had heard that phrase before so thanks to you guys the whole team learned something new. 😂
I asked my boyfriend if he would have our baby if it was an option, he immediately said yes with no hesitation, and added, “I would be a seahorse! Let me carry the baby. But I will be cranky and when I’m in the operating room I will scream that this is your fault 😂 like they do in the movies”. I have found my lobster and also apparently my seahorse 🥰, we can’t have children together because I’m fixed and already have three of my own. He never had kids but was heart broken when we realized we couldn’t have anymore. We can’t afford any kind of medical intervention for it so we have just come to terms with him being an amazing stepdad to my three kids who are all under 10 years old. I figured he would respond in a positive way but this was so sweet and empathetic that it made me tear up and wish more than anything that it could come true ❤.
The story with the husband trying to control pain management during birth is WILD to me. I feel so bad for the wife being stuck with this man as her baby daddy. I hope that he becomes just that… a baby daddy and no longer a husband to her. She deserves better.
Story 7: Her body her choice. End of story. Also I do need to add as I always do with sperm donor stories; everyone needs to listen to the voices of donor conceived people, a known donor is the best choice for the child [even if it is] solely for the medical history. Also a fertility specialist lawyer needs to be involved for all parties at every step of the process.
Story 6: the other incomplete audacity of this guy!! Saying, "we are both going through this experience, just differently". Yeah, the only difference is the fact that your wife carries the baby for 9 months and then goes through the hell of labor. I mean you can have an opinion but ultimately it's her decision. It also bothers me that he seems to care more about what is mom thinks than his wife. 🚩🚩 (Sometimes I play a game with myself to see how many times you guys can say the word "like" in an episode". )
I still can’t get over him being like “no one was consulting me on the pain management decisions” like yeah dude why would they? what pain will you be in that needs to be managed? Oh right none stfu Truly so oblivious
Story 4: the age gap, creeps me out as someone who’s 22, is never date someone in their 30’s- I can’t help but feel like she’s easily manipulated by him due to her age
56:53 my husband and I did the dirt combining thing at our wedding but we made it so that we used the dirt to plant a baby tree in one of those pots. It was super cute!!!
story 1- the ex wife chose to sell the house why the hell should anyone pay for a new house. this just seems like a toxic situation i personally wouldn’t feel comfortable around children who hate me and wanted me to have an abortion. has the husband not talk to the kids about their behaviour. it seems the husband doesn’t value her or their new family if he’s even considering paying.
imo they should try some family therapy with the kids. if they’re going to continue to live there, it sounds best to work out any resentment/hard feelings on both sides.
As someone who recently had a baby I will say, Morgan is right sometimes birth plans don’t go as planned. I had planned for a natural birth but I physically couldn’t and had to have a c section, didn’t ruin my birth experience at all.
Story 7 - The reason OP wasn’t the one getting pregnant is because she’s so insistent on the baby being related to them both and her partner doesn’t have ties with her homophobic family. The whole story is yikes especially that OP somehow thought her partner would be down for this when it was never discussed and considered previously for them to use OP’s dad’s semen.
I know some people utilise their family members as donors as this is something many ‘donor babies’ have since come out and said would be the ideal situation for them. To know exactly where they came from and not have looming questions. I do think in this story it’s different because if the wife is uncomfortable with it, that’s the end of the conversation- but as an overall concept there are positive sides to it. Not so much so the parent has this validation of being related to their child, but so that baby, child and future adult, fully understands their place in this world, doesn’t end up as a donor baby with 100+ siblings, or being unaware of their culture, potential hereditary diseases etc. Certainly not the right choice for every family requiring a donor but I think as always these topics are really nuanced 😊
Story 7: As an only child who happens to be queer, the thought of using a relative as a sperm donor for myself or my future wife is absolutely disgusting to me and would never even cross my mind. The OP is a total weirdo for that and it bothers me that she didn’t voice the whole “can’t love a child if it’s not related to me” thing to her wife earlier on in the relationship cause there is no way as a queer person that you don’t think about stuff like that. Our options are limited and the chances of our child not being biologically related to us is higher than in a straight relationship. If she wants the biological bond so much then she can carry it.
Story 1 is crazy. Ex got a paid off house and gets child support and alimony. And she's managed to go so off the rails she had to sell the house and STILL has no money left over for a downpayment on a new house? And never once came to the dad before it got to selling the property? But wants him to set it all right so the kids aren't "homeless" even though they had one mom sold and STILL have one with dad. That's just crazy. No. Ex does not get a new house. Absolutely not.
You should have a crewneck of Morgan’s face yelling saying “Ahhh” 😂 Would you let me draw that up for you guys? I’m a studio design student grading this May🥲
For story 6, I agree with Morgan in that he is misinformed. He does also mention that when it was brought up at the doctor, they brushed his concerns aside and he didn’t get any answers. I just hope that once they are in the delivery room he realizes just how hard it is and supports his wife how he should.
just my opinion (i'm a lesbian btw) but it's kinda rude that in the lesbian couple story, the one that has a good relationship with her family is the one who insists the child be biologically related to both of them. It's already weird to not understand chosen family feeling like your true family as a gay person, and her wife has no choice but to have chosen family only, as her bio family is no contact. It's such a privileged take. I 100% agree that it's a red flag to say you can't see yourself bonding with a child that doesn't share your DNA too. My sister is adopted and my brother isnt. It feels EXACTLY the same, and I look a lot like my brother and nothing like my sister. Still feels exactly the same as each other.
Labor and delivery nurse here! Long time listener, first time commenter. I have so many thoughts about this story but I’ll sum up my thoughts: 1) the pain control methods now vs even 30 years ago are completely different and way safer 2) I have many patients who intend to go without an epidural and change their minds REAL quick after they feel the pain of labor 3) fwiw, if I give birth I’m getting my epidural ASAP. IMO you get the same prize at the end 4) I’m a big fan of epidurals but never push them on my patients. However, I always explain that if something happens and my patient needs an emergency c section, having an epidural in place is much safer for mom and baby. If mom doesn’t have an epidural and needs an emergency c section, mom has to go under general anesthesia, which is very harmful to baby. Therefore, the c sections in that situation move extremely quickly and mistakes are often made. I’ve seen babies come out with scalpel cuts on their head because the surgery moves so quickly. I’ve only seen that occur in emergency c sections 5) the epidural is turned off as soon as the mom’s repairs are done. The epidural catheter is taken out within 2 hours after birth. That first hour is about baby transitioning, and as long as they’re getting time on moms chest, that is extremely sufficient. After the first hour, a lot of the time is spent giving an assessment and meds to the baby, therefore interrupting bonding time anyways 6) I’m always supportive of my patients birth plan but I’ve never seen anyone’s birth plan be followed 100%. Regardless, it’s always the moms choice 7) love that you talked about pelvic floor therapy! First time moms often take ~2 hours to push the baby out. My only patient to do pelvic floor therapy pushed her first baby out in 30 minutes. HIGHLY recommend!
I’m not pregnant or have any kids but have 12 nieces and nephews so I’ve talked pregnancy and babies since high school haha. I’ve heard that other countries offer pelvic floor therapy post birth but wasn’t aware it was something you could do in preparation for birth. Do you know how long your patient did pelvic floor exercises or was it just while they were pregnant?
So, I looked up the story about the guy who’s wife ended up killing their kids after he asked for a divorce, and to make matters worse, his former mother in law ended up making a gofundme to raise money for her daughters legal and medical expenses USING HIS NAME. On a new account, he also said that he can’t visit his kids graves as much as he’d like because his former in laws watch him in the truck at the cemetery whenever he goes to visit them
Asked my boyfriend if he would carry and birth our child. His answer was very easy, “yes I would look good pregnant and if I had to shit a baby, I would just eat a lot of chipotle before” 😭
The anti-epidural buddy should share his thoughts on a routine vasectomy without meds once the mother of his children is done with birth and birth control.
Or she can squeeze his nads instead of his hands with every contraction? Probably too much, but it might change his tune some..or make him more weirdly bonded to his mom than he already is.
Also I think the mom probably didt pay the taxes on the property and it got sold as a tax sale/back to the bank so she got a fraction of the worth, and her money likely went right to the IRS for the back taxes. That's the only thing I can think of aside her having an insanely heavy secret gambling addiction.
Pregnancy is the most beautiful, magical, amazing, TERRIBLE, HORRIBLE, UNCOMFORTABLE thing ever. As a mother of 5 (I know! 😅) I 100% understand both sides of loving pregnancy and hating it.
Response to time stamp 1:14:45 I HATED being pregnant. I’ve had 3 boys, my oldest is 15- he’ll be 16 in December, and my youngest is 1. So it’s fair to say that my pregnancies were pretty spaced out. My middle son who is almost 7, was my only planned pregnancy. I was miserable during my pregnancies. So I completely understand and agree with you two. I understand many women love being pregnant, but I’m not one of them. I love my boys and I’m so glad to have them, but being pregnant was not fun for me.
Story 1…if he buys her another house I can guarantee she’ll sell that one too and make the money disappear all over again. He could buy her a yacht, a mansion, a sports car or a private island and she’ll sell those too. Try as hard as you can but there is no changing someone who is selfish. Those kids are much better off living with their dad and step-mom and need to be taught respect. Being that disrespectful is a character flaw that they obviously learned from their mother. I would do everything in my power to help them unlearn everything their mother taught them.
Last year I was was in a relationship that was very toxic for me, and it took so long to realize how bad it was for me. It gave me a whole new respect for the people that realize it sooner
Story 3 - that poor child potentially one day having to explain to others that hi step-mom was originally his Aunt/ his *mother’s* **sister** 🤦♀️😓 25:14
I’ve been introduced to this podcast from Chris Klemins and ever since watching that very first episode I’ve been absolutely hooked. Subscribed.🎉 I’ve been binge watching the pod for weeks now. From free time to cleaning my house it’s so nice to sit back and listen to the two of you, plus episodes with guests and with Justin! it’s like chilling with the girlies and I love it. Thank you for bringing me stories I wouldn’t have otherwise heard!
Story 3: “I don't think I should put my family before my bf” She sounds like she has never put her family before her bf. 💀 She is literally dating a scummy ex of her sister like huh? And she was helping with the custody battle too?!? 😭
2 of my babies were nicu babies so I know the feeling of leaving your baby at the hospital isn’t the ideal situation but you’re not alone mama! You got this ❤
BRB y’all, just heard story 6. Gotta go start a fight with my partner over a hypothetical Edit to update: he said he’d carry our baby immediately 😭 For context, we have 2 already and we’re thinking about a third in the very distant future.
I love this, my dad loves to tell people that they are being obtuse when they say silly crap. He always says it jokingly and lovingly but it’s fun to hear it played out in some real hot takes!
Story 6: if men were the ones to give birth, the whole debate of birth plan would be very diferent and there wouldnt even consider the "option" to feel pain
41:52 I just watched a true crime video by Danielle Kirsty covering that post. The man's name is Jason Worley. It's such a tragic story. I literally thought of Two Hot Takes when I watched the video covering that case.
Definitely want the link for Story 4 (the one that got moved cause it was dark) - would like to be able to follow OP for updates to that situation 45:22
Story about birth: I have had 3 kids. 2 with epidural (medicated) and vaginally and 1 all natural (not by choice lol I just waited too long) and I bonded with each child in such a beautiful way after each birth. Medicated or not. An epidural doesn’t make you loopy. It makes you numb. Now sometimes they will give you pain meds before birth so you can rest. And I always asked for it LOL it is so strong it puts you to sleep immediately. But the pain meds AFTER birth aren’t anything. They barely work (on me) for long. And they just manage pain. Has nothing to do with binding with the baby. That’s all.
Kind of an offshoot of story 6, having women give birth on their backs is also a big part of the problem. I saw a video the other day talking about how it got started because it was easier for the doctor. Might be worth starting a literal movement to let women give birth how they feel physically more comfortable, too.
Story 6: It is 100% up to her if she wants pain meds or not. I do wonder what the husbands background is, because that could explain his feelings towards it. For example, I’ve done it without any pain meds because I come from a long line of women that have never had that available to them (Morgan said there was pain meds available back then, doesn’t matter because it wasn’t available to everyone, everywhere). My family comes from very rural parts of Mexico, my parents grew up without electricity even though it existed elsewhere, it didn’t to them. Both of my grandma’s had 10+ kids without doctors or pain meds, they’ve given birth on fields, on their own floor, or with a neighborhood woman that accompanied and helped as much as she could. My mom had us in the states with doctors but always opted out of pain meds of any sort and I was present for the birth of my younger brother when I was 16, so seeing her strength really impacted me. To me, it was a way to honor my mother and my grandmother’s, as well my aunts that have also gone through it. It was a very personal, meaningful, beautiful experience for me that was 100% worth it for me. Maybe he has some of the same reasons but at the end of the day it doesn’t matter because it’s up to her, not him. I couldn’t imagine doing much of anything without meaning behind it.
For me pregnancy was horrible. I was not glowing, I was hating every second of it. I’ve always said I’d rather give birth 10 times in a row than ever be pregnant again!
Same, I had hyperemesis the ENTIRE time from about week 6 to the moment my daughter was born and it was MISERABLE. If it had been 100 years ago I probably would’ve thrown up to death, I needed a PICC line so I could do IVs and intravenous nausea meds at home instead of having to go to the ER twice a week. Meanwhile my sister in law who was pregnant at the same time as me had a magical unicorn pregnancy, she was glowing her way through full on mountain hikes 😂 it’s weird how it’s soo different for everyone
1:13:06 “if Justin says no I’m gonna fight him.” ME too Morgan 😂 Like my bf and I don’t even want any to begin with- but I still need to know! And homeboy better answer correctly 😂😂
The first story was really weird. I fully believe the step kids’ mom poisoned them against OP. I think they are maybe in their early teens or maybe tweens. That age, kids are easier to influence or take advantage of by their parents, the ex made sleeper bombs of those kids. I hope OPs husband doesn’t give anything more to that woman and I hope she gets remarried so the alimony is void and null. The ex seems like a horrible toxic woman.
What even is the Dad talking about with his wife being loopy??? He’s a little bit dumb where childbirth is concerned. A spinal block or epidural does not make you loopy!! 🤣🤣
That last one really should not have kids at all. The fact that they said they wouldnt be able to be connected to it at all of it wasnt biological is concerning.
The birthing story. I was medicated. HEAVILY (bc it kept failing). Let me tell ya… when my daughter tore my cervix, i went from not being able to even hold up my own legs to feeling EVERYTHING in under a minute
Story 6: the reason women didn’t use medications to give birth for thousands of years was because they either didn’t have them or they weren’t as effective!
This is my favorite podcast to listen to while doing my hair and makeup. I'd love to see an ep where we hear directly from some of the ops, kind of like a special guest💕
Am I the only really scared for Stacy? (From the fourth story) I really really hope she's okay and she can return to her sister. This doesn't sound right...
In story6, I never understood the notion of that a woman has to go through childbirth with pain to “bond” with the child but men don’t go through the pain but can bond perfectly with the child
Right? I'm pretty sure skin to skin contact soon after birth is way more important to the parents and baby, since they don't have consciousness they're out of the womb for like 5-7 months.
This! My mom tried to go unmedicated for all of me and my siblings (4 of us) and my little brother who was the last she did successfully do it unmedicated and she told me she wished she went through with the epidural because she was in too much pain to even care about my brother lol. I will never forget the agony she was in while giving birth to my brother. She always told me even with the epidural only taking to one side, she’d do that any day over unmedicated because it makes you less uncomfortable and thus makes birth enjoyable.
This is a good COMMENT! 👏🏼🔥
@@emmajay2401 Babies definitely know they're outside the womb lol. That's why their sleep patterns are all messed up for months and why so many of them have "colic" a lot of doctors now call that PAS or Poor Adjustment Syndrome. They're having trouble adjusting to life outside the womb. It's also why swaddling (although now determined to be unsafe) helps them sleep. Being securely wrapped up reminds them of being in the womb and helps them relax.
@Ilikefrogs.. I didn't say they didn't know they're outside of the womb. I said they dont have consciousness, meaning they don't know they're not ma extension of their parents till the 5 to 6th mark. I just worded it weird.
Even if I was okay with my partner buying his ex a house, I would NOT be okay with it until we knew for certain why she broke the divorce decree and sold the last house.
I’d want to know why and where the money went..
@@304scorpio9 same, what did she do with the money from the sale?
I'd bet she used the house as collateral for something and it got taken from her and that's why she has nothing to show for the 'sale' of the home.
In the first story that lady is an asshole and I can see why the kids don’t like her, I don’t think she tried at all and to just expect the kids to move out the second they turn 18 is insane.. I don’t think their marriage is going to last long honestly. Everyone’s the asshole but she’s a bitch
What's also weird and I checks is the house was paid off so she didn't have a mortgage and he was paying her alamoni, and child's part more than the courts would have made him. She didn't have to work. Why would you sell that house?
for story 7, there is a lesbian couple in norway that had a kid recently. Cam was the bio mom, her egg was used, and Julie, carried and gave birth to the baby. they felt like even tho the baby technically isn't biologically related to Julie, she still had a connection to them because she carried him.
Love cam and Julie
me tooo!!
I love that too! I thought it was such a beautiful experience they shared.
plus she did a video on her birth experience, and someone put in the comments on one of their videos where she said she was sad she wouldn't have a genetic link to the baby, that actually fingerprints are created in the womb when baby is moving around, so that comes from her and not Cam, which was a very sweet comment I thought.
Love them tooooo
Story 1: They divorced because SHE cheated yet he has to pay her alimony that’s more than her salary? That doesn’t sound right…
Sadly this happens more than you think, men get the shit end of the stick in divorces
and now she wants hime to fully pay for her new house after she sold her already fully paid off house?? I'm sorry but what??
They said he CHOSE to pay more than that. Not that a higher amount was stipulated in the divorce.
This is what happened with my MIL and FIL. She cheated and got EVERY.SINGLE.THING
My husband was 14 when they divorced and he's 40 now and my FIL is just now, finally financially recovered. I don't understand, SHE WAS THE PROBLEM
@@cupofcozy708has nothing to do with being a man this is just how divorces with someone making 6 figures goes
That story about the husband wanting to dictate how his wife gives birth has me LIVID on so many levels holy sh!t
I was so pissed with this story too. Was literally pausing the video to punch my bed and yell into the blankets!
I spit my coffee out when he said he was “beginning to think he might be wrong”… no shit?!
My first delivery, I had a 9lb 10 oz baby and with him came a 4th degree tear. I am 5’3, 110lbs. Second baby, I tore up through my urethra. He can Stfu. Coach my ass. I’d kick him off the cheer team at this point.
So disrespectful and disgusting!!
The soil bonding had me WEEEAAAAAKKKK 😭😭😭😭😭 absolutely hilarious. Love it.
It's the fact that she's also helping her sister's ex with his custody battle for me. She wants to take her sister's child away from her?
And yet she's the one lamenting her sister's bullying. Something tells me she's a liar and the bully of the two. Especially with how gracefully her sister is handling her BS.
@@availanila Exactly. I don't buy the stuff she said about her sister. The stuff she only said after she began getting hate and called out. She's going on about how her sister is jealous. No, I'd say she's more uncomfortable and hurt than anything, maybe a bit angry as well considering what her ex and OP's new boyfriend did to her.
I was suprized they didn't mention that in the opinions part. Luke. That's absolutely INSANE to me. Woman is delulu, people will catch on amd she won't have anyone left besides family having on by a thread,
Story 6: OP has completely forgotten people have been using all sorts of things as pain medication (like alcohol and opioids) for a loooooong time
OP has also forgotten that the infant and maternal mortality rates used to be very very high...
They used to chloroform women during labor so uh, if anyone wants to talk about loopy 🤪😂
Story 6 - You don't get a trophy for giving birth without pain meds. If you want to have the full unadulterated experience, good for you... But there is nothing wrong with getting an epidural and you shouldn't force someone to do it your way. ESPECIALLY if you're a guy who will never experience childbirth.
It's so insane to think that pain is an accomplishment. It makes no difference on your child's life. Plus, epidurals don't make you loopy.
The only people who say “you don’t get a trophy” are the people who haven’t done it and for some reason like to try and make mothers who have feel bad about it.
that dude is a walking red flag!
@@jordanstreich210you do not in fact get an award. It’s pointless. If it’s a pointless thing you want to do ok but it’s still pointless pain
@@van2165spoken like somebody who is uneducated on the subject. Many women do it because the drugs can lower baby’s heart rate then leading to emergency C-section and other complications. The information is out there for you to educate yourself. My baby’s safety is #1 priority over any pain I may feel. But if you want to take the risks then that’s your choice but don’t dog the women who are able to do it, be confident in your choice without having to say other women don’t get a trophy. It comes off as insecure with the choices you made.
My sister dated my ex. He did it to make me jealous so as soon as he realized I didn't care he lost interest in her and cheated on her. I'd be careful if I were that girl.
I do not have a sister, but I don't think I could date someone she dated. Just the idea that you've slept with the same person, is icky to me
No seriously! They were family sooo NOPE I don’t think I could see any of my family members exs romantically. Specially my sister even if it’s a half sibling.
That is super weird of your sister. I could never look at any of my sister's exes that way, just gross 🤢.😊
I literally was thinking the same thing
I honestly believe op & the ex husband had tension or certain exchanges while he was still married to the sister..
I’m sure others have shared this too but I’m regards to story 6, as a mother who gave birth with an epidural, I was not “doped up” I just couldn’t feel my legs. I remember every moment of our sons birth, I felt every second of his first moments of life with the intensity and passion that this OP thinks his wife would feel while unmedicated. In fact, I believe I felt this even stronger because I wasn’t going through the most intense pain I’ve ever felt.
THIS COMMENT YESS! I also had an epidural, technically was put up on two types of meds, and it did not affect my memory, how alert i was, and even further it did not affect my baby's health in any way. You know what did affect my alertness? Exhaustion. If a mama is too tired / too in pain to push, it puts both the baby and mother at higher risk. I'm not saying one path or the other is better. i'm saying leave that decision to the person who's going to be putting in the work. Period.
@@R3vvv yes exactly!!! And thank you for saying that about choice, I also do not judge anyone for whatever choice they make for their birth experience.
I agree completely! After 30 hrs of active labor I was wayyy more out of it before I got my epidural and likely would have needed an emergency c-section if I hadn’t opted for an epidural and pitocin.
EXACTLY. When I had my 1st son, I went thru full on back labor but never dilated so no epidural. I begged for a C-section (after 3am to 2pm labor) + by the time I got the spinal, which I barely felt, I was so exhausted I couldn’t enjoy my newborn’s birth. It took days to feel up to spending time w/him.
Alternatively, my 2nd son was a planned C-section (or there’d BE no 2nd pregnancy) and it was a pleasant experience that I fully enjoyed and got to hold my son right away, agony + exhaustion free. It is still the happiest moment of my entire life.
I had a 28 hour labour and two epidurals. I started in the bath, but then got exhausted as I stopped dilating for ten hours.
I could move totally normally, could feel everything normally, just had less pain and could sleep through the start of it. By the time I was ready for pushing the baby out, most of my feeling had returned - but pushing out wasn't nearly as painful as the dilation phase.
Story 1: IMO she is definitely NTA, it is not an "everyone sucks here" situation. 1. What happened to the money from the fully paid-off house? 2. No, the children aren't homeless, they have 2 houses. The husband needs to think about the future of ALL his kids and needs to figure out what happened to the money and if his ex is a good fit to be a full-time parent. Life moves on and while her husband is responsible for all his kids, he is not fully responsible for his ex.
Fr. In what world is that EVER acceptable and HOW are the kids homeless when they have 2 households they could be at. And honestly it sounds like the KIDS are the ones making it miserable because they refuse to accept that their mother caused the split. Not op.
I'm so confused how everyone sucks in the first story lmfao SO confused. Makes absolutely no sense how the step mom is a AH. Wild take.
@@shelby_button This. I get that ur parents splitting up and one remarrying can be hard, but unless one (step)parent is genuinely a bad person, they should still be respectful. Your parents being divorced isn't a free pass to act like entitled brats or be disrespectful.
@@Trouble226 Same, like genuinely she just wants her husband to not make a dumb decision that affects their and their children's lives...
The only thing that would influence this for me is how old the other kids are. If they're 14+, she's absolutely NTH. But if they're much younger than that, I do think she's a tiny bit of an asshole. In that case, I would hope she would have the empathy to see that they don't know any better, are going through hard transitions, and that their mom has manipulated them into acting how they do.
I wish she wasn't so closed off to the idea of someday having a good relationship with them, because their mom sounds like a piece of work who definitely influenced the way they treat her. Yes, the things they said were awful, but they still have the time and ability to realize that and become good people. And they could really use another parent/supporter in that time that's actually stable.
Please we need an update for story 4. If you have it, tell us in an episode. We NEED it. Hoping Stacy is ok
Unfortunately, OP's last few comments were downvoted hundreds of times and piled on in replies insulting her and calling her a liar...so, there probably won't be an update.😢
@@davidharshman7645 do you have the link to the post or OPs username?
@@davidharshman7645noooooooo 😭😭😭
@davidharshman7645 do you know where we can find the post?
If you search the first title and click on the user, it gives you all op's comments. Nothing so far.
Story 4: I wish it were that easy for females to break up with their partners without facing violence. My sister was murdered in January of 2023, by the person she was dating at the time. I don’t know the exact reason as to “why” he killed her,nor will it ever change anything for me. But I believe that she was trying to desperately end it between them. One of my assumptions are, he couldn’t take no for an answer. 💔
Ladies please be careful out there.
That’s tragic… I’m sorry for your loss 😔 So many men can’t take no for an answer
Im so sorry for your loss, that’s heartbreaking. I hope you and your family are doing okay considering. Take care❤
I’m so sorry for your loss. It’s so easy for outside people to say just leave but that is the most dangerous time for most women in abusive relationships. I pray he’s facing justice.
I am so so sorry for your loss ❤😢
Oh no :(
My twin brother just died, and no matter how it happens, its horrible. It must be even worse when it's a violent person that did it purposefully.
Story 4 was horrifying I just hope Stacey is okay and he gets arrested
i have a feeling that even if she’d reported him for se-ual harassment she still wouldn’t have been taken seriously and he wouldn’t have been arrested. it’s scary to think that he ended up doing something so horrific and those BIG RED FLAGS get downplayed because it’s so common for men to do sick things like send unsolicited n00ds. I think the idea that “just because something is common doesn’t mean it should be normalised” should be so much more prevalent
@@kayegavlak7650 that's at the sad truth.
right? I am so worried about them. I hope we get an update
Wasn’t the husband’s friend that was there when he tried to s@x assault her, a cop? That part confuses me because he could have arrested him ring then and there.
Story 6: What does that even mean “doped up”?! Giving birth the first time is scary. Once I had really strong contractions I asked for an epidural. I has very relaxed and less nervous. I gave birth to a healthy baby boy. I hope she does whatever she wants with the mother in law “pride” bullshit.
In this case, I feel like OP's a foolish shitstarter and that man is using her worse than he did her sister. I pity her.
@@availanila Exactly! He wants to push this agenda of having him and his wife to have a closer bond than actually focusing on what his wife wants. She’s scared! That last thing she wants is to appease him and his mom during BIRTH. Like wtf ?!
He's clearly oblivious to the fact that when you're giving birth, you become a different person. You are an animal, you make sounds you don't even know how you made. You aren't capable of thinking of anything other than the pain, even with a good epidural!
Also If the baby was born “doped up” as they think , it wouldn’t be medically recommended by doctors across the world 💀
As someone who just had a water birth with no epidural, I did have laughing gas but TRUST ME I was not laughing lol. It definitely still hurts and you definitely still feel everything. The laughing gas just helps you control your breathing. It’s definitely not helpful with the pain! 😢 sorry to burst your bubble just want you to be aware
Damn my sil said it helped. I feel bamboozled
@@TwoHotTakesnot everyone is the same- and the level that they give you matters as well. If you’re still in a lot of pain, you can and should advocate for yourself and say you need them to turn it up. My friend did the nitrous and she said it helped tremendously with the pain, almost to the point that it was non-existent. Everyone is different, don’t let this deter you!
@@TwoHotTakesi mean it could have been helpful to her!! It works differently for different people
I had the same experience, was very helpful for breathing. But definitely didn't kill the pain. The water was amazing though 😍
@@TwoHotTakes I work at an Oral Surgery office and we give it to patients…it’s not that it helps with pain no, but it does help you sort of handle the experience better, you able to stay calm more easily, which can sort of psychologically help you interpret things as less painful/uncomfortable
For Story Number 7: her body, her choice. Sorry not sorry. If she doesn’t want to carry essentially what would be YOUR sibling, the conversation ends there. Also, I always get a little concerned when couples say that the child has to be genetically related to them. Family is more than genetics. It’s the connections you make and the memories you share. I don’t think it should matter. If you really do want kids, genetics shouldn’t matter. Having a kid is an experience and a child shouldn’t be put on this earth just to carry on your genetics. Adoption, if you have that ability and access (which it sounds like they do based on the story) is totally valid.
OP is kind of giving me the ick/weird vibes. I don’t like it.
OH I JUST HEARD THE WHOLE THING AND IT GOT WORSE. “I wouldn’t feel connected to a baby that wasn’t genetically mine.”
So you DO just want a kid to carry on the family line. That is so gross. That is so weird to me that you want to have a kid just so they essentially do a job for you. If 0P wanted to legitimately be a parent for the sake of being a parent, they should be able to commit to loving any child that enters into their life, no matter how that opportunity presents itself. The focus on gEneTicS is so friggin WEIRD. A child is not a group project where you bring your own materials. This is a living breathing human being.
I honestly hope the fiancé leaves. OP doesn't care about their body autonomy or their opinion. And if things like this are becoming an issue before they get married, it’s gonna get worse after the wedding.
YES!! omg thanks!! As someone that always wanted to adopt a kid, I felt a bit disgusted on OP's post
“I don’t think i could love a child I wasn’t biologically related to” is so upsetting for me to hear. I literally can’t even comprehend it. I’ve heard other people say similar things. It always fucks me up just spiraling trying to make sense of it. I don’t want to give birth ever, but I would do everything in my power to keep a child safe and loved. How is that not human nature? That person should not have kids bc as soon as that kid develops their own personality she’s gonna claim they don’t love her anymore.
yeah the whole “has to be biologically related” is a red flag. the fact that she wouldn’t be able to bond with a child unless they are related is just sad
as an adoptee, if someone doesn’t want to raise a child who genetically isn’t related to them, they shouldn’t and no one should try to guilt trip them into changing their mind or bash them. it’s not a red flag imo because adoption to complete strangers is fairly new, unnatural, especially wet womb adoption which would most likely be the case here, and causes damage. that baby would be unable to bond as well (because they literally can’t) but that’s clearly not a topic of discussion when y’all are demonizing op for being honest. with other animals, the young are raised by members of their own community if there’s a reason they can’t be raised by their biological parents, but paying for another person is strictly human and odd. especially because the people being adopted are hardly ever truly the focus. it’s clear based on this discussion. but everything about children should be child centered and adoption is just not that. adopted children have higher rates of abuse, being re-homed like they’re animals, and adoption is inherently traumatic. adoption should not be a family building tool, it should not be thrown around casually when it takes lives, families, lineage, history, and more. the history of adoption is based in human trafficking anyway and the laws aren’t that great, so idk why you want to make people feel bad for dismissing the idea, no matter the reason. children should not be an industry and as a queer person, it’s very sad to see prospective adoptive parents fed lies that they can just adopt when it’s not that simple. adoption requires trauma and it’s perfectly fine to not want to do that to another human being when you may not be fit to bond. it’s actually odd that this is seen as a negative or a red flag, because it’s not just about living a child that isn’t yours and if you can’t even do that then good on op for knowing their limits. the person that would suffer most from a situation like this would be the child, but again, they’re not the focus here when they should be. it’s so easy for kept people to say these “family is more than genetics” stuff because they don’t have to live with the effects of it
It’s hard to divorce. I posted “who tf did I marry” on Reddit and my husband found it. And said I lied about it. He then told me if I can’t deal with “abuse” to leave and “why should he care about his daughter if he’s never going to see her” I’m almost 20 weeks pregnant and officially fed up. It’s scary to leave but it’s scarier what he can do to me. Grateful for this podcast.
Are you aware of local resources to help you? I’m sorry that you’re dealing with this.
Are you still with him? Do you need help leaving? Are you okay
Hey, I just wanted to offer the suggestion that if you go to ANY appointment like to a doctor or vet do your best to get a small note out for help. They are trained to deal with those situations. Write it the bottom of any forms you need to fill out or a piece of napkin if you need to give a urine sample. There are people out there who will want to help you but, it won't be an easy journey. If possible get important documents and money set aside so he can't get to them.
Sounds very scary. I used to have an abusive ex, getting out was scary. After that I have met lots of great caring men as friends and bfs and now a husband. It's so great coming home and feel safe and happy, year after year, no matter what the problems!
hey, just checking in…
how are you? did everything went fine?
Story 6: For any man that thinks an epidural takes away all pain, I still felt pain while pushing with both my kids. It definitely eased the pain of the contractions and allowed me to rest, but come go time it hurt. Also, I was in no way doped up and was able to fully bond with my babies after. I just couldn’t stand on my own for a few hours.
The fact that mean need a parade if they stub their toe, it’s just so infuriating when they think they can tell women a dammed thing about their body and how they feel
I was called obtuse once by a person I was dating...I laughed so hard I could barely get the words out "did ya just call me a triangle?!"
Story #3 is insane, anyone who dates a siblings ex is just a mess. There's no amount of money anymore would pay me to date my siblings ex especially a ex husband WITH A CHILD, your niece/nephew!?!
This! Because if they get married and have kids that’s a sibling/cousin. She’s a hot mess and so is he
Yea, auntie-step mom is so wild to me
Yesterday at work I heard a coworker say she knew someone whos husband does things wrong on purpose so he doesn't have to do them anymore and I said that was weaponized incompetance and nobody had heard that phrase before so thanks to you guys the whole team learned something new. 😂
I asked my boyfriend if he would have our baby if it was an option, he immediately said yes with no hesitation, and added, “I would be a seahorse! Let me carry the baby. But I will be cranky and when I’m in the operating room I will scream that this is your fault 😂 like they do in the movies”. I have found my lobster and also apparently my seahorse 🥰, we can’t have children together because I’m fixed and already have three of my own. He never had kids but was heart broken when we realized we couldn’t have anymore. We can’t afford any kind of medical intervention for it so we have just come to terms with him being an amazing stepdad to my three kids who are all under 10 years old. I figured he would respond in a positive way but this was so sweet and empathetic that it made me tear up and wish more than anything that it could come true ❤.
No story has pissed me off as much as story #6 in awhile 🤣
Literally I was biting my finger I was so mad
Right??? Listening to her read the part about "we're going through this together, just differently" like Jesus dude. How inept can you be?
Amen.
Ideas for future merch:
1. Halloween edition - Two Hot Stakes
2. Morgan's Birthday edition - Two Hot Cakes
Omfg two hot cakes 😂😂😂
I need that written over my boobs 😂
3. Christmas Snow edition - Two Hot Flakes
The story with the husband trying to control pain management during birth is WILD to me. I feel so bad for the wife being stuck with this man as her baby daddy. I hope that he becomes just that… a baby daddy and no longer a husband to her. She deserves better.
Story 7: Her body her choice. End of story. Also I do need to add as I always do with sperm donor stories; everyone needs to listen to the voices of donor conceived people, a known donor is the best choice for the child [even if it is] solely for the medical history. Also a fertility specialist lawyer needs to be involved for all parties at every step of the process.
Story 6: the other incomplete audacity of this guy!! Saying, "we are both going through this experience, just differently". Yeah, the only difference is the fact that your wife carries the baby for 9 months and then goes through the hell of labor. I mean you can have an opinion but ultimately it's her decision. It also bothers me that he seems to care more about what is mom thinks than his wife. 🚩🚩
(Sometimes I play a game with myself to see how many times you guys can say the word "like" in an episode". )
I still can’t get over him being like “no one was consulting me on the pain management decisions” like yeah dude why would they? what pain will you be in that needs to be managed? Oh right none stfu
Truly so oblivious
@@blackgirlmagiccThat’s what took me out! Dude literally will have NO PAIN!!!! He’s being an idiot!
Story 4: the age gap, creeps me out as someone who’s 22, is never date someone in their 30’s- I can’t help but feel like she’s easily manipulated by him due to her age
U mean story 3? Or is there one more story with an outrageous age gap 😭( I just got to story 3)
plus they were already married by her 22nd bday meaning they were together who knows how long prior… sketch for sure
56:53 my husband and I did the dirt combining thing at our wedding but we made it so that we used the dirt to plant a baby tree in one of those pots. It was super cute!!!
story 1- the ex wife chose to sell the house why the hell should anyone pay for a new house.
this just seems like a toxic situation i personally wouldn’t feel comfortable around children who hate me and wanted me to have an abortion. has the husband not talk to the kids about their behaviour. it seems the husband doesn’t value her or their new family if he’s even considering paying.
imo they should try some family therapy with the kids. if they’re going to continue to live there, it sounds best to work out any resentment/hard feelings on both sides.
Starting the petition now for "soil bonding" at Morgan & Justin's wedding 😂
As someone who recently had a baby I will say, Morgan is right sometimes birth plans don’t go as planned. I had planned for a natural birth but I physically couldn’t and had to have a c section, didn’t ruin my birth experience at all.
Story 7 - The reason OP wasn’t the one getting pregnant is because she’s so insistent on the baby being related to them both and her partner doesn’t have ties with her homophobic family. The whole story is yikes especially that OP somehow thought her partner would be down for this when it was never discussed and considered previously for them to use OP’s dad’s semen.
And also the child will be like "my grandparent is my father" 😬
I know some people utilise their family members as donors as this is something many ‘donor babies’ have since come out and said would be the ideal situation for them. To know exactly where they came from and not have looming questions.
I do think in this story it’s different because if the wife is uncomfortable with it, that’s the end of the conversation- but as an overall concept there are positive sides to it. Not so much so the parent has this validation of being related to their child, but so that baby, child and future adult, fully understands their place in this world, doesn’t end up as a donor baby with 100+ siblings, or being unaware of their culture, potential hereditary diseases etc.
Certainly not the right choice for every family requiring a donor but I think as always these topics are really nuanced 😊
Story 7: As an only child who happens to be queer, the thought of using a relative as a sperm donor for myself or my future wife is absolutely disgusting to me and would never even cross my mind. The OP is a total weirdo for that and it bothers me that she didn’t voice the whole “can’t love a child if it’s not related to me” thing to her wife earlier on in the relationship cause there is no way as a queer person that you don’t think about stuff like that. Our options are limited and the chances of our child not being biologically related to us is higher than in a straight relationship. If she wants the biological bond so much then she can carry it.
these episodes really save my days on bad mental health days
Just wanted to remind you that in this community you are loved and cared for 🫂
@@hayamirin6795 thank you so much!!❤️
I save them so I can watch them when I get ready to go out
Yesss going through a break up feels like I’m listening to friends talking 😣😂😭😭
Yes! And today is BAD😢
Story 1 is crazy. Ex got a paid off house and gets child support and alimony. And she's managed to go so off the rails she had to sell the house and STILL has no money left over for a downpayment on a new house? And never once came to the dad before it got to selling the property? But wants him to set it all right so the kids aren't "homeless" even though they had one mom sold and STILL have one with dad. That's just crazy. No. Ex does not get a new house. Absolutely not.
Right!!!! Sounds like she has to deal with the consequences of her poor decisions.
You should have a crewneck of Morgan’s face yelling saying “Ahhh” 😂 Would you let me draw that up for you guys? I’m a studio design student grading this May🥲
I'd buy that lol
Yes!
Yes let's go!!
For story 6, I agree with Morgan in that he is misinformed. He does also mention that when it was brought up at the doctor, they brushed his concerns aside and he didn’t get any answers. I just hope that once they are in the delivery room he realizes just how hard it is and supports his wife how he should.
It was crazy to me that he seemed surprised that his wife and the doctor ignored his suggestions
just my opinion (i'm a lesbian btw) but it's kinda rude that in the lesbian couple story, the one that has a good relationship with her family is the one who insists the child be biologically related to both of them. It's already weird to not understand chosen family feeling like your true family as a gay person, and her wife has no choice but to have chosen family only, as her bio family is no contact. It's such a privileged take. I 100% agree that it's a red flag to say you can't see yourself bonding with a child that doesn't share your DNA too. My sister is adopted and my brother isnt. It feels EXACTLY the same, and I look a lot like my brother and nothing like my sister. Still feels exactly the same as each other.
Labor and delivery nurse here! Long time listener, first time commenter. I have so many thoughts about this story but I’ll sum up my thoughts:
1) the pain control methods now vs even 30 years ago are completely different and way safer
2) I have many patients who intend to go without an epidural and change their minds REAL quick after they feel the pain of labor
3) fwiw, if I give birth I’m getting my epidural ASAP. IMO you get the same prize at the end
4) I’m a big fan of epidurals but never push them on my patients. However, I always explain that if something happens and my patient needs an emergency c section, having an epidural in place is much safer for mom and baby. If mom doesn’t have an epidural and needs an emergency c section, mom has to go under general anesthesia, which is very harmful to baby. Therefore, the c sections in that situation move extremely quickly and mistakes are often made. I’ve seen babies come out with scalpel cuts on their head because the surgery moves so quickly. I’ve only seen that occur in emergency c sections
5) the epidural is turned off as soon as the mom’s repairs are done. The epidural catheter is taken out within 2 hours after birth. That first hour is about baby transitioning, and as long as they’re getting time on moms chest, that is extremely sufficient. After the first hour, a lot of the time is spent giving an assessment and meds to the baby, therefore interrupting bonding time anyways
6) I’m always supportive of my patients birth plan but I’ve never seen anyone’s birth plan be followed 100%. Regardless, it’s always the moms choice
7) love that you talked about pelvic floor therapy! First time moms often take ~2 hours to push the baby out. My only patient to do pelvic floor therapy pushed her first baby out in 30 minutes. HIGHLY recommend!
I’m not pregnant or have any kids but have 12 nieces and nephews so I’ve talked pregnancy and babies since high school haha. I’ve heard that other countries offer pelvic floor therapy post birth but wasn’t aware it was something you could do in preparation for birth. Do you know how long your patient did pelvic floor exercises or was it just while they were pregnant?
I want to see the OP from the natural birth story get a filling done on his tooth without anesthetic using his “natural pain relief remedies”.
So, I looked up the story about the guy who’s wife ended up killing their kids after he asked for a divorce, and to make matters worse, his former mother in law ended up making a gofundme to raise money for her daughters legal and medical expenses USING HIS NAME. On a new account, he also said that he can’t visit his kids graves as much as he’d like because his former in laws watch him in the truck at the cemetery whenever he goes to visit them
I'm trying to find this story because I didn't recall the episode, was it the Brandi Worley?
@@Jade-fx7ksyes!
My favorite thing is when Lauren says “God Dammit…” after a story 😭😭 it sends me every time
Story 1: if she sold the house, where did the money go? She can buy her own
Asked my boyfriend if he would carry and birth our child. His answer was very easy, “yes I would look good pregnant and if I had to shit a baby, I would just eat a lot of chipotle before” 😭
Keeper
Winning answer 😂😂
Story 6: man is completely delusional.
I have never been as mad as I got about story 6 and I’ve been listening for a long time. There’s no way he’s for real.
The anti-epidural buddy should share his thoughts on a routine vasectomy without meds once the mother of his children is done with birth and birth control.
Or she can squeeze his nads instead of his hands with every contraction? Probably too much, but it might change his tune some..or make him more weirdly bonded to his mom than he already is.
Also I think the mom probably didt pay the taxes on the property and it got sold as a tax sale/back to the bank so she got a fraction of the worth, and her money likely went right to the IRS for the back taxes. That's the only thing I can think of aside her having an insanely heavy secret gambling addiction.
Pregnancy is the most beautiful, magical, amazing, TERRIBLE, HORRIBLE, UNCOMFORTABLE thing ever. As a mother of 5 (I know! 😅) I 100% understand both sides of loving pregnancy and hating it.
Story 6, my husband had actually expressed being jealous he couldnt carry one of our kids because he was missing out on a big bonding experience
Response to time stamp 1:14:45
I HATED being pregnant. I’ve had 3 boys, my oldest is 15- he’ll be 16 in December, and my youngest is 1. So it’s fair to say that my pregnancies were pretty spaced out. My middle son who is almost 7, was my only planned pregnancy. I was miserable during my pregnancies. So I completely understand and agree with you two. I understand many women love being pregnant, but I’m not one of them. I love my boys and I’m so glad to have them, but being pregnant was not fun for me.
Story 1…if he buys her another house I can guarantee she’ll sell that one too and make the money disappear all over again. He could buy her a yacht, a mansion, a sports car or a private island and she’ll sell those too. Try as hard as you can but there is no changing someone who is selfish. Those kids are much better off living with their dad and step-mom and need to be taught respect. Being that disrespectful is a character flaw that they obviously learned from their mother. I would do everything in my power to help them unlearn everything their mother taught them.
Last year I was was in a relationship that was very toxic for me, and it took so long to realize how bad it was for me. It gave me a whole new respect for the people that realize it sooner
For story 4, there's a Netflix doc about the story you mentioned where the woman kills the kids. Terrifying story.
What's it called?
Story 3 - that poor child potentially one day having to explain to others that hi step-mom was originally his Aunt/ his *mother’s* **sister** 🤦♀️😓 25:14
Generous you think it’ll get that far lol
I’ve been introduced to this podcast from Chris Klemins and ever since watching that very first episode I’ve been absolutely hooked. Subscribed.🎉 I’ve been binge watching the pod for weeks now. From free time to cleaning my house it’s so nice to sit back and listen to the two of you, plus episodes with guests and with Justin! it’s like chilling with the girlies and I love it. Thank you for bringing me stories I wouldn’t have otherwise heard!
Story 6, everybody can kiss my epiduralled ASS - you’re not any better than me for not accepting help. Be better
Story 3: “I don't think I should put my family before my bf”
She sounds like she has never put her family before her bf. 💀 She is literally dating a scummy ex of her sister like huh? And she was helping with the custody battle too?!? 😭
I have 3 adopted children. I couldn’t imagine loving a bio child anymore than I love my 3 adopted kids.
Right like it’s a child??? How can you not want to love and protect a child????
The soil-bonding ceremony legit sounds like something from the Schrute family. 😂
I needed this ep today sooooo bad. Working the day before a holiday is soooooooo boring for me, need this to keep me alive today lol
My 10 day old baby is in the icu. These episodes really help me get through all this. Thank you❤
Hey I just want to say that you're alone here in this community ❤
@@crystallovingfairy1not alone *😅
sending you lots of love
@@Katherine-ym9xn omg! Thank you my phone is weird when it comes to YT comments
2 of my babies were nicu babies so I know the feeling of leaving your baby at the hospital isn’t the ideal situation but you’re not alone mama! You got this ❤
I can't explain how much I love you guys! Days in the office are much better with you! ❤❤❤
BRB y’all, just heard story 6. Gotta go start a fight with my partner over a hypothetical
Edit to update: he said he’d carry our baby immediately 😭 For context, we have 2 already and we’re thinking about a third in the very distant future.
Story 3: so OP was helping sister's ex husband to get full custody of the kid?
I love this, my dad loves to tell people that they are being obtuse when they say silly crap. He always says it jokingly and lovingly but it’s fun to hear it played out in some real hot takes!
Story 6: if men were the ones to give birth, the whole debate of birth plan would be very diferent and there wouldnt even consider the "option" to feel pain
Men can’t even handle the cramp simulator 😂
41:52 I just watched a true crime video by Danielle Kirsty covering that post. The man's name is Jason Worley. It's such a tragic story. I literally thought of Two Hot Takes when I watched the video covering that case.
What's the title I wanna hear it :0
@@pinkiichi ua-cam.com/video/xhDi1tz07gE/v-deo.htmlsi=3rwew2wMArfWV_kQ
Definitely want the link for Story 4 (the one that got moved cause it was dark) - would like to be able to follow OP for updates to that situation 45:22
Story about birth: I have had 3 kids. 2 with epidural (medicated) and vaginally and 1 all natural (not by choice lol I just waited too long) and I bonded with each child in such a beautiful way after each birth. Medicated or not. An epidural doesn’t make you loopy. It makes you numb. Now sometimes they will give you pain meds before birth so you can rest. And I always asked for it LOL it is so strong it puts you to sleep immediately. But the pain meds AFTER birth aren’t anything. They barely work (on me) for long. And they just manage pain. Has nothing to do with binding with the baby. That’s all.
Kind of an offshoot of story 6, having women give birth on their backs is also a big part of the problem. I saw a video the other day talking about how it got started because it was easier for the doctor. Might be worth starting a literal movement to let women give birth how they feel physically more comfortable, too.
I’m always excited to see Lauren and Morgan together for an ep! 🎉🎉
Story 6: It is 100% up to her if she wants pain meds or not. I do wonder what the husbands background is, because that could explain his feelings towards it. For example, I’ve done it without any pain meds because I come from a long line of women that have never had that available to them (Morgan said there was pain meds available back then, doesn’t matter because it wasn’t available to everyone, everywhere). My family comes from very rural parts of Mexico, my parents grew up without electricity even though it existed elsewhere, it didn’t to them. Both of my grandma’s had 10+ kids without doctors or pain meds, they’ve given birth on fields, on their own floor, or with a neighborhood woman that accompanied and helped as much as she could. My mom had us in the states with doctors but always opted out of pain meds of any sort and I was present for the birth of my younger brother when I was 16, so seeing her strength really impacted me. To me, it was a way to honor my mother and my grandmother’s, as well my aunts that have also gone through it. It was a very personal, meaningful, beautiful experience for me that was 100% worth it for me. Maybe he has some of the same reasons but at the end of the day it doesn’t matter because it’s up to her, not him. I couldn’t imagine doing much of anything without meaning behind it.
Yay! I was wondering if we would get an episode today! ❤️ I was literally just talking to my bf about it. You guys are amazing ❤️
For me pregnancy was horrible. I was not glowing, I was hating every second of it. I’ve always said I’d rather give birth 10 times in a row than ever be pregnant again!
Same, I had hyperemesis the ENTIRE time from about week 6 to the moment my daughter was born and it was MISERABLE. If it had been 100 years ago I probably would’ve thrown up to death, I needed a PICC line so I could do IVs and intravenous nausea meds at home instead of having to go to the ER twice a week. Meanwhile my sister in law who was pregnant at the same time as me had a magical unicorn pregnancy, she was glowing her way through full on mountain hikes 😂 it’s weird how it’s soo different for everyone
THIS!
I hated pregnancy but loved my labor!
Lauren and Alejandra are my favorite! Love when they are on ☺️
Yeahhh, they're awesome! Lauren is my favorite! She's so well spoken and has clever opinions! I love that about her
Oh, BTW, concerning the soil bonding? Brilliantly epic!!
Story 5: I want to see the footage or pictures of that “soil ceremony” so bad😂
1:13:06 “if Justin says no I’m gonna fight him.” ME too Morgan 😂
Like my bf and I don’t even want any to begin with- but I still need to know! And homeboy better answer correctly 😂😂
Absolutely love that you come out with videos early in the morning so I can get ready and listen
The first story was really weird. I fully believe the step kids’ mom poisoned them against OP. I think they are maybe in their early teens or maybe tweens. That age, kids are easier to influence or take advantage of by their parents, the ex made sleeper bombs of those kids. I hope OPs husband doesn’t give anything more to that woman and I hope she gets remarried so the alimony is void and null. The ex seems like a horrible toxic woman.
What even is the Dad talking about with his wife being loopy??? He’s a little bit dumb where childbirth is concerned. A spinal block or epidural does not make you loopy!! 🤣🤣
So happy you posted today! I’m at work alone and batch making our syrups for the coffee shop!
Please keep us updated about Stacey from story 4 that is absolutely terrifying and I hope she is found safe 🙏🏻
That last one really should not have kids at all. The fact that they said they wouldnt be able to be connected to it at all of it wasnt biological is concerning.
Ahh! I love you guys! ❤️ And super excited for the merch!! I love everything! But the socks! I can't wait! 🎉
The socks are going to be so good omg
The birthing story. I was medicated. HEAVILY (bc it kept failing). Let me tell ya… when my daughter tore my cervix, i went from not being able to even hold up my own legs to feeling EVERYTHING in under a minute
I just finished my 2nd day of training for a new job, and this early update feels like the universe throwing me a bone. Awesome work!!
Yo early podcast and I'm early for it! This is WONDERFUL THANK YOU
Story 6: the reason women didn’t use medications to give birth for thousands of years was because they either didn’t have them or they weren’t as effective!
Exactly 😂 that’s like saying if you catch a virus/illness don’t take any meds bc they didn’t do that in the past 🤦🏽♀️
This is my favorite podcast to listen to while doing my hair and makeup. I'd love to see an ep where we hear directly from some of the ops, kind of like a special guest💕
I love the Dusty Thunder podcast!! You should invite Dusty to be a guest on THT one day ❤
Story 5: omg the way i was cackling at this in the middle of my office 😂 They was so freaking funny
Am I the only really scared for Stacy? (From the fourth story) I really really hope she's okay and she can return to her sister. This doesn't sound right...
Okay but why did y’all have to upload this JUST as I finish at the gym? I love listening while I work out
story 4: does anyone know what happened to stacey?
Watching this while working and I realized that I have the same blanket currently on my lap that Lauren is using in the video haha
Sounds like a cozy work day my friend :)