What Body Dysmorphic Disorder Feels Like | Body Language
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- Опубліковано 6 вер 2024
- A young woman careens through her adolescence, prying at the grip of BDD. Panic and anxiety kaleidoscopically blur the world around her as she fights for her own self-acceptance.
If you are affected by the issues in this video, further information and support can be found here: www.bbc.co.uk/p...
Featuring Hannah Lewis
Director & Photographer Sindha Agha
Producer Paulette Caletti
Executive Producer Juliette Larthe
Illustrator Avalon Nuovo
Animator Louise Miller
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i feel like everyone else is always prettier and better than me and i’m completely hopeless
rileys eggos that can’t be true because anyone in this world is better looking than me
purple potato u clearly have never seen me😔🤚
yeah same, i feel like i’m never ever gonna look normal or be normal yk?
vannah i know how you feel, to me you’d probably look normal but i find my dysmorphia and intrusive thoughts messing up my thoughts
you all are so wrong. You didn't see me. I'm the ugliest girl in the world. I attempted suicide twice. You don't know how ugly I am
Anyone else do the opposite of avoiding mirrors?
Just looking at one all day thinking god I wish I could change the way I look.
Mhm. I even lift my face up and stretch my features into places I’d rather have them be, just to feel some sort of satisfaction with the way I look
Yup. Even tho it makes me cry to look in mirrors, I have an obsession with looking at my face and lifting my nose up. But for some reason every time. I look at myself, my face changes.
Yes. I have a mirror in front of me at all times even if it makes me cry. I am OBSESSED to stare at my face. I hate my nose the most. I have hundreds maybe thousands of pictures of my nose on my phone from the front, from the side. I take pictures of my side-profile every single day. I cry almost every single day over my appearance. I am so depressed, so tired. When people compliment me, it's like they're talking but nothing's coming out. It's like I put them on mute the second they start complimenting me. One rude comment kills me, while 100 compliments does nothing. I am a prisoner in my own body, I suffer every single day.
I used to avoid mirrors. Everyday, I passed at least 2 mirrors. I ended up looking at my flaws and then I looked up ways to make them perfect
@@orangesodabliss you literally just described me sadly
My issue is that I see pictures I take of myself and I feel okay, and then I see pictures people take of me and I can’t believe that I look like that, like it isn’t real and if it is it makes me feel absolutely terrible 😢
Lisa Morey i have never related to something more than this comment.
Lisa Morey same
Same ! I wonder how I manage to look so different In the pictures I take and when I look in the mirror compared to when other people take pictures ! It frightens me as if I’m not aware of how others truly see me ...
Sometimes I feel so good. Other times I cannot stand this vessel I make myself feel physically sick. It’s gotten to the point where I can’t turn the lights on in my bedroom or the lounge up to full brightness. Before I would only use the toilet when it wasn’t sunny but now I’m getting better I think.
But people like you and I have to realise, reassure ourselves that appearance is not all there is to life. We need to stop holding ourselves back! Stop deprecating and start acknowledging our merits :)
Have a good day!
Me too! Going through the exact same thing
you know what the worst thing about having bdd is? the fact that no one truly understands it and they think we're just self centred
exactly, my friend always says that i’m a complement fisher
Jaxx G Someone at my job said that out loud in front of the other employees at my workplace. I was so embarrassed and felt so ashamed. My other coworkers were giving me compliments on my shape and I just didn’t believe them. My whole life I didn’t think anyone could find me merely attractive. So I automatically rejected the compliments.
"Why do you care about appearance?" I don't judge others by their appearance, I only judge myself because I learned to do it
@@msworld2827 and the thing we surely want to avoid is complements!
i have bad bdd and i got to know a guy over the phone, not having met him. We ended up falling in love and he even asked me to move in with him and was calling me a lot. had a great connection. but my bdd got worse during that time and still is at the moment and now its destroying my relationship. i worry about blemishes on my face and if i gain a little weight, making me even 5 or 10 lbs overweight, makes me feel like no matter what he says, im not good enough even though i know that doesnt make sense. He is so mad at me for it and even calls me names and ignores me now and says im messing things up with us. It breaks my heart and makes me miss my grandparents even more. They recently both passed away. i was so close to them. It triggers that sadness, too. He doesnt really understand. Feels too overwhelming to even meet him now. i even thought of wearing a face mask while with him in private if my skin isnt clear, and yet, i wouldnt feel differently about him if he gained any weight or had skin trouble. We cant miss out on life though. Remember, your darkest time can become your most powerful testimony. We can overcome this. It does not define us. There is a lot more to us than looks. We should focus on the good we have to give and remember that people are not out there, focusing on us in detail, thinking we dont look good enough or that we're gross. We're too hard on ourselves. People are out there, in their own head, thinking of whats going on in their lives and what they're going to do next, and they have their own fears, worries, and stuff going on they're dealing with. They arent scrutinizing us. Its ok. We have a purpose and there is a lot of good in each of us. i hope we let it come out more of the time. Its like the lyrics in this song that goes, 'we were meant to live for so much more...but we lost ourselves. Somewhere we live inside.'
I take a selfie and I like it. I see others take a picture of me and it’s as if I’m a different person. I look in the mirror one morning and I’m fit, but in a public mirror I look 10lbs heavier. My face is different shape every week, slightly. Sometimes I see myself and I look away because I don’t want to see it. My friend tells me I’m slim. Photos tell me I’m not. I hate it.
Omg i relate to this so much
@@veronicacrush1364 omg same
Same honestly
Ayden Grace I hope the author of the comment doesn’t have this disorder but, dear, you can’t something ‘doesn’t sound’ like a disorder. every disorder has many many many forms.
This is probably the best description of what it feels like. I used to struggle with it so badly
BDD sucks. It's more than just being insecure about your face or body. You think about your apparence every second of your life. You avoid mirror, you cry seeing your face. I feel so bad feeling this way because I know there are worst and more important problem in this planet.. . But I can't stop thinking about my look and being sad about that.
I feel this so much:(
DONT COMPARE YOUR PROBLEMS YOUR JUST AS IMPORTANT❤️❤️❤️
Just know that it’s not a competition. Yes, there are things bigger than you. But that doesn’t mean that your problems don’t matter. I’m right there with you. Keep trying!💕
I thought this was normal oh god
I feel this so much I always wondered and thought why I think about my body all day long and every second of the day and can never get it out of my head. It’s so tiring and draining and I hate feeling this way but It won’t seem to stop
Does anyone else also feel terrible in specific types of lightning? Fluorescente lightinng ( like in supermarkets or classrooms) and the bright light in the morning are the worst for me.
I feel the same way... I think about it all the time.
I get that. It's a form of sensory processing disorder.
I'm actually the opposite, warm lighting makes me so uncomfortable and i don't know why
Omg I relate
Yeah mate, it's horrible.
Sometimes I wonder if I have this or am I just ugly......it’s gotten to the point where I carry a mirror in my bag everywhere I go to check I look alright, I feel insecure in makeup but ugly without it. my face looks wonky and puffy and ugly to me and I feel like people are talking about how ugly I am... I check my appearance all day...
same i always have a pocket mirror to check if everything is ""alright""
i relate to this so much !! it’s horrible :(
I learned from someone that even if we are all those things we see, the fact that it causes so much distress is what constitutes the disorder. Plenty of people out there who dislike things about their appearance but they carry on with their lives. I know I'm ugly because people have made it very clear that I am ugly everywhere I go, but the fact that I can't stop thinking about it and it has ruined my life is what makes me ill.
Does any one else avoid mirrors?
Natasha K I don’t avoid mirrors. I like mirrors because I get a chance to check myself and see what other people see. But I get self conscious when other people look at me looking at myself in the mirror
I do ! I thought it was just a thing I did
I hateeeee mirrors and one side of the wall in my room is all mirrors and I hate it
When I look in mirrors I look ok but in pictures it's not the same
i only have two and they are always covered to avoid unnecessary tears
Some days I spend hours getting ready. "No that looks hideous, it shows my stomach too much" "ugh my arms look so big!" "I need to make my nose look smaller. I need to have my hair down to do that... Yikes but my hair looks disgusting." I'll go through my whole wardrobe until I'm too late to be on time anywhere. I give up and stay in the house another day.
That sounds awful, it must be so exhausting spending hours to get ready, and having such self-deprecating thoughts. You dont deserve for BDD to be taking away parts of your life and making you stay inside. If you havent already maybe you could try speaking with a therapist who might be able to help you with the thoughts?
@Samantha Wong I've dealt with this my whole life too, so similar to what you're describing. I was always told it was just low self esteem and I'll grow out of it, or if I lose weight or dress a certain way It'll go away. Now I'm almost 24 and worry about getting old, I gained some weight 2 years ago and now I've lost 60 lbs this year so far. Everyone comments on it, telling me I'm withering away and just pointing it out and saying congrats or I look good and ask me how I did it. Those comments hurt so bad I just want to scream at everyone and cry and almost want to hurt them because I don't feel any different. My clothes don't seem to be big on me and I don't feel lighter and when I look at myself I look fatter than I was 60lbs ago and I'm not even at a healthy BMI yet. I only eat 500 calories a day so I can lose weight and I was working out and nobody knows how hard I worked for no result. I wish my body would just go away, I want to get rid of myself and be invisible or something. I want to walk around as someone else, anyone but myself. I get jealous of morbidly obese people because they just hold theit weight better than I do. Their skin is tight and not saggy, and they have so much confidence, they wear whatever they want and it's like I just see a big person and it's not the same as my flaws. Sometimes I think being dead would be easier than having to deal with this every day. I can't stay trapped at home (work distracts me and the uniform hides me well so it's only fun things i want to do that i don't make it out for) and I can't spend hours getting an outfit on or freaking out and being upset for so long after keeping me from trying to enjoy an activity at home. I feel so sorry for my boyfriend he deserves so much better than me. I want him to leave me and get a girl good enough for him who will go out with him, and I told him a few times and he gets upset when I suggest it. It only makes me feel worse.
bylilybee everyone gets frustrated because “I take too long getting ready” what they don’t see is me crying in every outfit I try on. They think “you look fine” but I know I don’t. I feel like they’re lying. Just going to the gym takes me an hour to finally convince myself to get out of my room. Sometimes walking out of the house I take one last look if I’m not pleased I get back in my room and try a different outfit. I can wear a shirt one day and feel great but the second time I wear it I feel so disgusted in it and I tell myself I can’t believe I actually wore that before and felt confident. It’s so hard to live with.
same but i am fat and have too many freckles and my face is so asymmetrical 😓 i try to put on makeup to cover my freckles but they never fully cover, they'll still show through which makes it obvious that I'm wearing makeup so i look cakey and disgusting. also my skin can never look clear thanks to my freckles. crying for the 3rd time today about it.
i stay in the house most days too. its not about appearance or whatever, i just really dont like socializing.
You should do one about Chronic fatigue syndrome, its often portayed as "young people being lazy" in comparison to what it truly is.
@Yasmin Basit Here's a good, but short, example of someone's story with CFS www.cdc.gov/me-cfs/patient-stories/stories-ann.html
@Yasmin Basit If I'm not mistaken there's a Golden Girls episode on it that you might look up.
I'm struggling currently with the period of time where I am no longer in bed as I'm recovering, but people now think I;m not sick anymore and it's like "no I still struggle, I'm working my butt of to wake up before midday each day, and that one day I go out to school is hard."
@Sky Cookies It's similar to fibromyalgia. It can cause lots of inflammation and an overall feeling of being tired constantly. Near exhausted and can last for years.
@Sky Cookies About 40 seconds in they list how it feels to this character with the disease. ua-cam.com/video/Q51C8y8t_Y8/v-deo.html
It feels like everybody is staring at me. It makes me feel awful about my skin,lips,nose the list goes on. I feel like a monster.I have had is for 2.5 years and it sucks.
Ellie Cohen I feel this l! I’m always thinking about what i look like and wondering what others are seeing and if they are thinking the same thing I’m thinking about my self every second of the day. 😭
I
Anyone else remember wearing t-shirts 2 sizes too big because you didn't want people to see what your body looks like and feel like crying whenever you had to go cloth shopping. Good times
I still do that :'(
lol me. I don’t always have a breakdown in the changeroom but it still happens.
Lol I still do it and will never stop because I'm not capable of healing
I do that
This has destroyed my life and destroyed me as a person 😞
me too, my friends are slowly starting to dislike me because they're realizing how I actually feel
BDD COMMUNITY IS HERE FOR YOU. We can help each other keep fighting the negative feelings and be kind to yourselves
God bless my killer it might be more common than you think. If there is anyone in your life you feel comfortable to talk to let them know there is something your struggling with and you’re not looking for someone to tell you your wrong your looking for someone who will listen and is willing to try to understand. Maybe talking it through will help you find a root where your dysmorphia comes from. Also on any of these types of videos you’ll most likely have some allies in the comments. Holla at your moral support ✌️💗☘️
The bddfoundation has online support groups
Same
I think it is weird how everyone has different triggers. I’m always okay when I shower, feel good doing my hair and makeup, and then I start to think about the fact that I need to get dressed. As soon as I open my closet doors my stomach clinches and my heart feels heavy. Some days it makes me cry and I end up with half of my closet on the floor from trying everything on and nothing working. I try to tell myself that they are just clothes and no one else will care but when I leave the house, any reflection I see takes my level of happiness lower and lower. Everyday when I walk into school alone, there are these huge windows by the doors and I watch myself as I walk up and just think about how disgusting I look. I think maybe one day out of the whole semester I have walked up to those windows and actually felt okay. I have tried getting help but the lady I tried talking to was so weird and didn’t understand my problems at all. I want to try again but it is so expensive and hard to get in with someone. I feel like my family doesn’t know how much my anxiety and lingering effects of depression still affect me.
From the moment I woke up from the moment I fell asleep each and every single day was just non-stop bombardment with intrusive thoughts about my body. It takes your life.
"Intolerant to anything making me feel more alive in this body" wow I feel that. So awful but very relatable. Good to see this talked about more
I feel so awful when participating in things and people want to take pictures. I hate it so much at school when...
This video is pure art and the content is very educational,great work.
Me:
•avoids Mirrors
•Dislikes it when people take pictures of me
•Cover myself with my jacket during hot weathers
I hate mirrors but I am obsessed with them. I hate my face and everytime I look at the mirror, I hate it more. But I can't stop. It's gotten to a point where I build myself the way I want to look in my head, and get a mental breakdown when I check the mirror and I don't look like what I designed in my head.
I get that. Don't worry you're not alone, fingers crossed we can one day love ourselves. I love you mwah
@@sophiagoes7375 You're sweet
Thank youuu ly❤️
For me I become very irritated and upset when I see myself in the mirror or when people tell me i look good but my brain is messing with me and making me think something else...
Hazardous Reign Yeah, when people compliment me, I get so annoyed. Maybe I feel like they pity me or that they’re lying only to try to make me feel better.
O
@God bless my killer I don't think they are lying,you are beautiful inside and outside and always be positive not negitive ☺☺
What she says sounds like an exaggeration but it's honestly what it feels like. My heart goes out to anyone with this disorder.
maybe this video will make people stop mixing up body dysmorphia and gender dysphoria.
i seriously don't see how or why so many people get them mixed up but they do.
Ariann right?
I actually got it mixed up. I have body dysmorphia but I would get it mixed up with gender dysphoria. I have an e.d. and I would absolutely hate myself, especially my chest. I never knew why and when I was looked it up, everything I was feeling, a lot of the things that popped up were about gender. It was before I knew what either of the terms meant. I then looked at videos of people talking about their experience with gender dysphoria and I was really convinced I had it. It wasn’t until later when I was in therapy and matured some more that I realized that I felt different in my body because I had body dysmorphia. I felt like I wasn’t me and my I would cry so hard and literally want to cut the parts I disliked from my body. Everyone experiences they’re mental illnesses different, especially since their are different diagnoses. My illness was especially triggered by my chest and other areas that people that have gender dysphoria experience. I hope this makes since...
@@nellyh185 By "mixing up" I meant like, they know they have either one or the other, but they keep calling it by the opposite name. Like someone knows they have gender dysphoria but keep calling it body dysmorphia.
I think we have expectations for what our body should look like for our gender that when we arent close to it, we think we are just the other gender. Like i have a flat chest and it would make me feel more of a boy in that way even though im a woman. At some point they probably give up on trying to be what they expect to be and say they're "agender" or something else
I think its because most people dont say "gender dysphoria" they just said "dysphoria". When u take the gender part out it's easy to mix up dysphoria and dysmorphia
i hate seeing body dysmorphia used as the new term for insecure; thinking you’re legs are too big or your lips are too small. it’s a crippling mental health disorder, and people using it to express they don’t like something about their appearance is underpinning it’s severity. it’s the same as people saying they have depression because they’re sad, anxiety because they’re nervous or adhd because they’re a bit giddy. these are disorders that people have to struggle with every single day and everyone needs to be more educated on mental health
It scares me how much I can relate to this-....
Mine is not as bad as hers, but when i take pictures of myself or look at myself in the mirror i think i’m beautiful and pretty but when i look at pictures taken of me i sometimes think “is this really how people see me? Damn it’s horrifying.” I try to not think like that but sometimes my mind just doesn’t want to stop thinking like that and it sucks.
i feel exactly the same way
Lisa di Antonio Maria Gherardini
don’t diagnose someone randomly off the internet please
ME ME ME
that's normal
me yesterday because i was feeling down but decided to stay a little positive. My sister the took pictures of me with back camera and literally cried for like an hour. horrible horrible feeling!!
i experience some symptoms from body dysmorphia as part of my depression and it’s awful. my heart goes out to people dealing with severe body dysmorphia, the symptoms i deal with a hard enough and i can’t imagine how difficult it is to live with full blown body dysmorphia. don’t be afraid to ask for help if you think you need it, you’re not weak for having a mental illness xxx
Hi there hope you have found help since your comment, I recently found Caldwell Ramsey's work on BDD and its been so helpful to my healing journey
It got so bad I was self conscious about the way I walk
I never get up from my seat in class cause I'm so insecure of the way I walk.also I'm 5'9 and I feel so big.Ppl always feel free to point out my height and it makes me feel so bad
I walk abnormally because Im too self concious and I think people stare at me all the time. One person even told me I walk rlly weird
i dont have body dysmorphic disorder, but girl i felt what you said
Lived with body dysmorphia my whole life and always just felt like I was some kind of mistake or alien. I never felt like I fit in. Always convinced myself I could never look normal like everyone else. It's ongoing but learned to kind of be somewhat comfortable in my own skin. I still deal with it in social settings and still struggle with comparing myself with those around me. Believe it or not. What I did was go to pole fitness I went into an all female setting where everyone was all shapes sizes heights and every single person there had something different about them they all hated. I realised every single woman in the room had atoeast one thing they didn't like. I realised I didn't have to look like the women I the magazine they taught me strength taught me to feel confident taught me that its ok to not be ok sometimes. But I no longer feel like im not good enough. I have relapses in times of great stress and anxiety and any trauma sometimes retriggers it. Therapy didn't work until I had therapy from a woman who actually had it too. I had to relate to the therapist or feel they could relate to my thoughts and feelings. It's something that I think I will always have. But I no longer feel like that alien in the corner. I do my best to look a certain way that I know im happy to leave the house. And I avoid mirrors and redoing my make up throughout my bad days which taught me to do a less is more approach with make up. I avoid magazines that have unrealistic or photoshopped images. And part of one therapy session was seeing untouched photos of women I thought were perfect. Nobody is. It's all fake lol I just had no idea.
body dysmorphia is so debilitating. it can be feeling like you're not worthy of anything because of the way you look. it feels like you're clawing out of your skin at times. nothing feels right or good. all you can think about is how you look and how other people think you look. it makes you want to curl up and go outside.
I’m having rhinoplasty in a month in hopes to silence my bdd, I’m not naïve, it’s not going to silence it, but I need to do something, I need to start living
Amélie Stay strong, girl ♥️
Live
I can't wait to have mine done.. I'm considering a BBL even though I already have a flat, toned stomach, small waist and a big booty. I feel like it's not enough..
@@KYRA_FX lmao
I had rhinoplasty 2 years ago after planning it for 4 years and although it helped me a bit it doesn't silence your BDD and I'm not even satisfied with it I've told my surgeon I want it redone lol but im less upset about it now. I'm now struggling with an eating disorder because the focus just shifts to something else for me my ocd from bdd has allowed me to control my weight now instead of focusing on the things that cost money to change . imo you just have to live with the dysmorphia but realise you can never trust your own external perception and like this woman said in the video focus on who you are internally
Can you do one about depersonalisation disorder?
Yes dpdr p l e a s e
+
Can you explain it please?
@@goldenapple3952 it's kinda complicated and hard to explain but the short version is depersonalization is when your body doesnt feel real & u don't recognize your hands, face, etc. Derealization is when your surroundings, like people and the environment, dont feel real to you.
Yes please. Depersonalisation and derealization
The worst thing for me is having it coupled with anorexia and a binging disorder. I feel like I'm on a rollercoaster. People constantly comment on it, and it drives my anxiety through the roof.
My life is on this loop:
- I stop eating. I lose weight, people say things like "oh, you look well" and "you must feel better losing some of that weight!" (I'm chubby btw, so they think it's always a positive thing when I drop a few pounds).
- I become happier and comfortable in myself again and start eating normally. But then because my body has been without proper nutrients, the weight starts coming on again rapidly. When I meet friends, they smile, look at my face and then their gaze drops to my body and their expression changes to one of poorly-concealed disgust. They notice that I've re-gained the weight.
- I feel self-conscious again and the anxiety builds-up. My appetite becomes out of control and I lock myself away, cancel appointments and eat all the things I wouldn't let myself eat before.
- I wake up out of my trance, days later and I look in the mirror. "I am a failure and I hate every inch of my body" I say to myself. Suddenly I realise that I still have commitments to keep in my life. Places to go and people to see but I don't even want to leave my room. I have to lose the weight again before I can face the world. I cry because I hate myself.
- I stop eating.
For anyone who took the time to read that, it was really hard to write but it felt good to get it off my chest.
I can't help but imagine that the voice is Rae from My Mad Fat Diary...but the important thing is thank you for posting this. It means a lot to me ❤❤❤.
I was going to say Petty Paige :o
Holy shit as soon as she starting speaking I also immediately thought of rae
No I think Rae has a higher pitched voice. Maybe like an older rae
jacintalovesart it’s more so the accent that reminds me of Rae, as well as this overall topic and the part where says she thinks she’s funny
this is exactly how i feel, i’ve always felt this way and it’s exhausting keep it all inside but still at the brim of it all.
I want to hug this person.
I’m alright taking selfies because I feel in control but when other people take pictures of me I feel out of control seeing how I look in the photo about every aspect of my face/body
Every reflection I come across, Be it, mirrors, car windows, shop windows, blank tv screens, etc, I always check my appearance to check if I look ok, but the next reflection would come along and I still need reassurance and I hate looking at myself from certain angles and on video and in some pictures
The fact that she did this video shows immense strength and bravery!! No one who works so hard on spreading such a good message deserves to hate themselves XX you ARE beautiful inside and out. But beauty doesn’t matter. Your strength and kindness do
Sometimes I just cry in front of a mirror wanting to die so bad knowing how disgusting my body looks, knowing how ugly I am.
i hope you're better now but still, if that's you on your icon you're really beautiful
I had severe BDD which started 6 years ago and lasted about 4 years. But now i'm much much better and think i'm a normal looking person. You can get better
i needed this. been feeling like this since I was 4 and you can see how cute I was at that age but somehow i feel like i grew wrong somehow
I've tried to explain this to my Mom so many times but every times she says it's not a thing, it's not a big deal, I'm just making it up or I don't really have it and it's just an excuse not to get out of my bed. I wish she could put herself in my shoes for once and understand.
Sameee
I always avoid to take pictures of myself and if i took one I'm not very satisfied in the way I looked. I have so many flaws that I can't even count it on my fingers. When me and my friends hang out sometimes i just don't join them when they need to take pictures i always tell them that I'll be the one to take pictures of them because I secretly feel like i don't belong in the group because they're so beautiful and stunning and there's just me an ugly ugly ugly neglected potato
I come back here whenever I feel like I cant take it anymore, I'm really grateful for this video ♡
hand on my heart I genuinely would be a much happier person if I had plastic surgery
l u c i d t r a m p I believe the same. I genuinely know that if I got plastic surgery that my happiness and confidence would increase. My nose is a huge problem for me and it's the main reason why I shut myself off from my friends and family. I refuse to go outside because I hate the fact that people can see me. I hate laughing because people can see my teeth. I don't have any hobbies or interests because I feel embarrassed doing anything since I'm so ugly there's no point in trying. :(
@@jade-lv9ft Sameeeeeeee. Literaly sameeee. It ruins my life and has for already 3 years.
Couldnt agree more. I only think about how to get the money :/ so frustraating. And at times i give up on it because it seem s impossible, especially when depression gets worse. And i need the surgery NOW…so sad
i have BDD and it’s hell. this video is so helpful,i don’t experience it in the exact same way that this woman does but this really does help
Sometimes I wish, I really want to say and speak with all my feelings like the one in this video. Even I can't fully say to my BF, he is a perfect person and loved by many people, sometimes I feel insecure if i near with him, but I don't want to be far away. I knew he wouldn't fully understand what I was feeling, so this burning feeling in my body still lingers.
I used to avoid looking in mirrors, windows, pictures and everything else I'd be able to see my face in. My worst angle was seeing myself from the side. Everywhere I went I was looking at other people and imagine what it feels like to be them or how they feel about their nose. Eventually I began comparing myself to my brother and other family members. It manifested into so much doubt and anxiety. It got so bad I'd hope I'd get into a car accident where I'd bang my head so hard I'd think normal by some miracle.
Sameee. Im always looking at people, specificly their noses, and i think that everybody looks so ‘normal’. But i dont. I just want to look normal…
I believe you do look normal but it's just your mind which is fixated on your nose.
Lol is their anyone else who hates looking at the mirror but feel like their compelled to and then you just stare at your face and body, disgusted?
"the only explanation that i could think of is that i was a scientific experiment gone horribly wrong" oh boi, i've always wondered this about myself
Thank you for posting this ❤️💯😭😫 thought I was the only one
What? Do you mean you have BDD?
Stay strong I hope you are getting help
People who have BDD can't even bare to be seen. Yet you have a profile pic. Don't be an attention seeker.
@@averydavis1943 exactly. I have bdd and I don't use pictures for anything. The only photos I have of myself are for my passport and id and I have them in a box shoved into hidden storage. If they had it there's no way they'd put their pictures online in any way
@@averydavis1943, that is true. However, the disorder can easily be seen as nothing more than self condince issues. If you don't experience it yourself, it's difficult that you'll understand to what extent it can destroy someone's life. Don't be that harsh, tho. I don't think she means to offend anyone.
I’m trying to get over body dysmorphia
I’ve had terrible anorexia and I’ve been in recovery for almost 5 months. I still feel dysmorphia. I believe I am insanely bigger than everyone else and disgustingly gross in the face
I'm in the exact same boat im in recovery 6 months and everyone thinks you're better when you gain the weight but i feel like i wanna hide constantly
cheap as chips I wish you well in your recovery. Much love and respect to you.
whinona purple I wish you well in your recovery. All the best 💖
whinona purple I really felt that. It’s like the second I am physically healthy, everyone thinks I can eat anything I want without a care in the world. But in all honesty, I hate myself more than I ever have before. I’m so ugly. I hate my face. I know people will jump in and say “no you’re not I bet you’re pretty”. But I am actually very ugly. Probably way uglier than everyone in the comments, my friends, my family. Sometimes I just want to jump out of my own skin. I always feel like my thighs are too big but everyone tells me I’m skinny. But no one has ever told me I was pretty. In a weird way, my eating disorder started because I felt so out of control with the way my face looked that I wanted to control my body and make it look perfect. Those thoughts still sit with me at this moment. They just aren’t that strong I guess? I hope anyone that is suffering gets better soon. Bless your heart and soul. You are all so beautiful. Trust me. I wish you all the best in life. Hoping my life will turn out ok as well.
Rijul D big nose, big yellow crocked bucked teeth, small squinty eyes, large moles all over my face,
And that’s just the tip of the iceberg.
I am as ugly as sin. There is no way that you are the ugliest person in this comment section as I have claimed that title.
I hope your life turns out well. All the best. 😃
It took me 23 yrs of this before I got better I’m 37 now. Growing up can help to . You won’t always be like this. There is hope
I don’t even want to get better because the only way that would happen is if I lie to myself. I don’t want to get better unless it’s actually fixed.
Im crushed to know that I’ll have to live with this body for the rest my life. I can’t escape it. I didn’t want this.
I feel you…
I’m just waiting for the day I die tbh. I feel like I was misdiagnosed with bdd and I am actually the ugliest person alive
"And we can beat it." Really hit hard.
I smiled because of that.
i came back to this video after years because i feel like everything is hitting me back again... and this video, hearing that someone with something that i have, heal from it, fight it, gave me so much hope... and i really need that again
Its so painful to deal with. Its just, suffering. You can be the prettiest girl in the world, and truly believe you are the ugliest person to have ever lived. Its awful. The depression, anxiety, the self hate, its awful. Its been a struggle to deal with it. Ive skipped school because my aunt sent me a picture of me. Of course she sees a normal girl, i see an ugly, hideous, almost ogre. I plan to get some type of teeth straightener, eyebrows to be small, a perm for curly hair, lip fillers, and possibly a jaw symmetry surgery if the teeth straightener doesnt work. I plan to absolutely kill myself with workouts to be skinny and have a small waist, small arms (even though i have very smalls arms) big legs even though they’re already big. Just, a lot.
I have felt ugly my whole life. Only now have I accepted how I look. I am ugly but happy, because I would be ugly and happy, than ugly and miserable. There are so many worse things in life than being ugly.
I thank my brother for helping me out in my teenagerhood, realizing I was having panick attacks and helping me recognize it, telling me it's ok to take a break to deal with the anxiety. Thank you.
I often forget how I look, and when I see myself in the mirror I feel... disappointed.
I teared up watching this! To anybody out there with BDD like myself, you are brave and we are all in this together ❤️
Hi there hope you have found help since your comment, I recently found Caldwell Ramsey's work on BDD and its been so helpful to my healing journey
Apparently I have BDD. I don't think so. I know what I am seeing is real, even if people say it isn't.
Everyone else is prettier than me. My face changes constantly. I despise mirrors.
I don't know what to do.
u have it bub I'm sorry
When I’m at home I’m constantly checking myself in the mirror like 3-4 hours a day but when I go out I avoid mirrors so I don’t have a panic attack, does anyone else do this?
I really love these Body Language videos. They're so artistic and beautiful to watch while being educational. I would love to see such a video on HSP (highly sensitive person).
This was a great video! I been suffering from BDD for most of my life since I been maybe 8 or 10...im glad to fully have recognized it and I'm working towards being fully cured for this seriously debilitating disorder
I dont have this but i really relate to the feeling of selfishness when you go out in public, like you're forcing everyone to look at your hideous body
is avoiding mirrors a symptom of body dysmorphia? like at home, im comfortable with looking in my mirror but whether its at school or shops i always avoid the mirrors. whenever my friends are taking pictures i get very anxious if the camera is pointed at me, and i will even try to avoid reflections from car windows and blank phone screens :/ Im sorry if i come across as someone who self diagnoses, but i really hate the way i look.
NHS saving lives daily ♥️
I’ve got a love hate relationship with my body, right now it’s a hate relationship every time I go to hospital I get weighed and I’ve seen them put down my BMI and I know what the number means. I even look at my clothes and think they are way too small for me. I put them on and they fit me, I hide underneath baggy clothes most of the time. I take photos of me and that’s me, I look in the mirror and I look so different to what it looks like on the screen. I’ve been doing this since like 10 I’m 25 now and I’m still not in a comfortable place. I don’t go out much in summer because it’s too hot & I don’t ‘do’ summer clothes because that means showing off some skin. Everyone says I’m tiny but I don’t see it. I have to take my boyfriend with me shopping because I think I’m way bigger than what I am but, to me I’m still big. It’s like an endless vicious cycle x
My bdd is mostly about my breast size being smaller than average ( almost flat) being 20 years old, it destroys me. I think about it everyday, I compare myself to everyone, I can’t watch tv, can’t go on social media. It’s destroying me
i dont believe i have bdd but i am quite worried about myself. There are so many parts of myself that i cant stand and that i want to change. I spend hours looking at myself in the mirror just starring at the parts i dont like. I hate my skin tone, my eyes, my nose, my broad shoulders, my fat arms, my waist (love handles), my back, my flat ass, my skinny thighs, my fat claves, my big ugly hands, the fact the hands are always red, my wide feet, the fact that my feet are also always red, my wide ankles, and my eyebrows. This doesn’t prevent me from going out which is how ik that i dont have bdd but i still really hate these things n they just take over my mind. i know fs that my mental health is ok n that these are just common problems i have to work through but idk how. I spend sm time thinkinh about these awful parts of myself that i had to cover all the mirrors in my room so that i wouldnt look at my self and go down the road of it taking over my mind. I dont how i can forget about these things but if anyone has any ideas id love to know💕
I wish I had ideas to give, but I dont. Because sadly, i also have insecurities with my looks. I sometimes wonder if any man would want to get married to someone as imperfect as me.
im 20 ive been going through this for 5 years now, im still struggling
I've covered all my mirrors and I just don't want look at myself. I'm way too ugly.
I don't know if this counts. But, more extremely during early highschool, I'd avoid looking at mirrors, and I had a mental version of myself in my head, and I'd imagined myself looking like that all the time, and when I come across a mirror in public and see what I really look like, my mind just,,,shatters.
Thanks whoever show this video in front of me
does anyone else constantly stare at pictures or the mirror and stare at all the flaws you see, and even find new ones. It’s on my mind all day and every day.
I relate to everything, and I mean everything in this video. My therapist cancelled my first appointment because of covid. It was the one thing I was looking farward to because I don't really speak up about that sort of thing.
How do I know if I have this or if I’m just absolutely disgusting.
I know exactly what you mean 😢
LL
My family couldn’t afford private care and the NHS (I live in England) won’t help anyone with mental health if they aren’t literally attempting suicide. One of my best friends brothers suffers from paranoid psychosis and the NHS won’t help him because despite the fact he can’t leave his room and he’s been formally diagnosed the NHS decided he wasn’t sick enough to get help.
My problem is I look like a model in the mirror and on my snap camera then I see myself in a picture taken of me and my whole symmetry is completely different
These videos are incredibly made and are so valuable in that they can really help and educate so many people.
Thank you
I don't have bdd because I dont think I am ugly at all, I know I am ugly, Ill start a load of freckles, pale skin, ginger dark and baggy eyes, gosh I would love to end it all
I can spend up to 2-3 hours daily just looking at myself in the mirror. Looking at my stomach and sucking in the most o possibly can and then letting go. Chastising myself for being fat. I spend way too much time actually crying in the mirror at my appearance. Sometimes when I go out I look in the mirror or at windows in shops and I immediately get this feeling of dread that I’m obese and the only way to make myself feel better is to go home immediately. And hide. Sometimes I get mad at myself for eating more than 2 meals a day and liking food makes me feel like a pig. Idk if it is BDD bc I’ve never seen anyone about it but it sure as hell sounds like it and it sucks.
'intolerant to anything making me more sensitive to being alive in this body'...felt that.
BDD is not just feeling ugly or wanting to not look at yourself It is so much more than that... This girl actually knows what BDD is like.
one of the things I find hardest is when my friends are looking through photos for memories and even though I was present, I refused to be in photos or videos etc because I was convinced I looked TOO bad to the point they'd get angry when I asked them to retake the photos. it's sad because I feel left out but it's my own fault
Omg what she says at 0:54 is exactly what I think and now has me thinking I probably have bdd, only I don't think I had it as a child, but so many people told me I was ugly that I developed it? Is that possible?
So an hour ago I actually liked how I looked in the mirror just looked again and I feel abnormal again , my jaw and nose look completely different after an hour , this is body dysmorphia
I'm a 5'5 18 yearold guy that it ruins me because I'm short and have many scars. I just sometimes wish i was dead in my accident
i like it when i see myself in selfies but when people come and talk to me i imagine how huge are my pores and how disgusting my acne looks face to face AAAAAA
also i have a thing with my smile wrinkles and im 19 soooo
Same byw im 20
Do one on derealization/ depersonalization disorder
Please
it's gotten to a point where i can't even look at my shadow anymore..
You certainly have a beautiful voice :) I'm happy that you're doing better :) Keep it up girl!
I really relate to this video😭
Thank-you, so much for sharing your story.
All throughout middle and high school, I always wore long sleeves and long pants. I never wanted to show any skin because I thought I was too fat and didn't want anyone to see. It could be 100 degrees outside and I would still wear long sleeves. I remember sitting at my computer before a vacation trying to figure out if I would have to buy an extra seat on the plane because I was so large. In reality, I was a normal weight according to my BMI. I still look at photos of myself from that time period and I'm always surprised that I do not look huge, because I still remember myself as being huge back then.
If I won the lottery:
1. Buy a house in another country - fear, paranoia, safety
2. Get small plastic surgery - I work with kids, they always ask why I wear makeup, even when I have hardly any on. They tell me I look older, but perhaps it's bc I'm tall.
3. Save - because I'm afraid I won't earn enough money for a family in the future, I want a house in a location where I feel safe.
4. Get a makeover, find out which makeup and skincare, is best for me - I can't ever find what I'm looking for, my hair is a mess, I just want to feel comfortable having a photograph
5. Go to the gym - I'm so weak, it's bad, please are shocked and laugh at my inability to do stuff, I just want to feel comfortable with my posture and how I stand and walk
6. Get speech help - held back my voice for years, even had a stutter for one year, I hate my voice
7. Get singing and dancing lessons - because of my past regrets
8. Go shopping - because alot of what I bought feels like I wasted my time and money
9. Give to helping the world - there's so much help needed, I would focus on climate change (e.g. tree growth, green transport and eco kiosks) and overpopulation (birth control + education)
10. Give to family - Sometimes you've got to give back, sometimes you also want to give
11. The ability to travel - green transport + getting to places so I can actually have a chance at forfilling my dreams. Freedom.
I would say, only one of these is completley healthy, and that's just horrible.