Chris Williamson: Positive Masculinity
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- Опубліковано 3 чер 2024
- 'The bar has NEVER been set lower...'
Chris Williamson is an English podcaster and UA-camr @ChrisWillx Since 2018 he has hosted the Modern Wisdom podcast which has been downloaded over 200 million times. He discusses current events, politics, philosophy, science and hobbies with a variety of guests including Jordan Peterson, Steven Pinker, Neil deGrasse Tyson, Will MacAskill, Robin Dunbar, Michael Malice, Sam Harris, Eric Weinstein, and Patrick Moore.
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Stand-up comedians Konstantin Kisin (@konstantinkisin) and Francis Foster (@francisjfoster) make sense of politics, economics, free speech, AI, drug policy and WW3 with the help of presidential advisors, renowned economists, award-winning journalists, controversial writers, leading scientists and notorious comedians.
00:00 Intro
00:53 The Mindset that Creates Success
08:00 Overcoming Barriers to Progress
13:57 Being Intentional About Relationships & Content
21:45 Why Valuable Things Are Better Than Easy Things
26:21 Sponsor Message: AG1
27:30 The Bar For Greatness is Set Low
31:03 How to Raise Resilient Children
41:15 Being an Only Child
45:07 The Current State of the Dating Market
52:17 Chris’s Main Issue With the Red Pill
56:05 Are Women Lacking Sympathy For Men?
1:10:26 Chris’s Advice for Young Men
1:14:34 What’s the One Thing We’re Not Talking About?
WATCH the rest of the interview and hear *Chris* answer audience questions.
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CHAPTERS👇
00:00 Intro
00:53 The Mindset that Creates Success
08:00 Overcoming Barriers to Progress
13:57 Being Intentional About Relationships & Content
21:45 Why Valuable Things Are Better Than Easy Things
26:21 Sponsor Message: AG1
27:30 The Bar For Greatness is Set Low
31:03 How to Raise Resilient Children
41:15 Being an Only Child
45:07 The Current State of the Dating Market
52:17 Chris’s Main Issue With the Red Pill
56:05 Are Women Lacking Sympathy For Men?
1:10:26 Chris’s Advice for Young Men
1:14:34 What’s the One Thing We’re Not Talking About?
btw when are you having the hoe_math guy as a guest?
Thank you for having me boys. I enjoyed this one!
Thank you for not remaining silent about your thanks. Silence is consent.
A model who speaks well and has a sexy voice is wondering why it's all easy.
Social chameleon with no identity of his own
"A gram of talent, an ounce of hardwork, and the genetics of a northern European demigod and all this can be yours!" 🤣 keep it up Chris!
Another masculinity pundit!
I don't understand why there's so much negativity about Chris. He's a great interviewer who has clearly learned a lot from his many interesting guests and seems like a pretty genuine guy on a worthwhile mission.
EDIT for context: When the preview of this video was first uploaded, there were a lot of surprisingly negative comments. Since then, they seem to have been outnumbered and pushed down by the more positive / neutral comments.
He's a male chameleon who softballs every interview and nods along with whatever talking points are presented to him.
If he actually believed half of the things he says, he wouldn't even host half of his guests. Much less humor them.
Some real sad fucks out there.
@@ephraimwinslow What's wrong with you?
What do you believe? @@ephraimwinslow
Bullshit@@ephraimwinslow
I remember a girl I dated who felt so small and insignificant, despite being charming, intelligent, and cute. When I asked her why, she said she felt she had done so little in her life; all around her were social media stories of other women jumping in parachutes, baking the loveliest cakes, scuba diving in the Maldives, etc, and of course, all of them stunning...and here she was, just doing her masters degree and trying to get ends to meet. It struck me how she compared herself to all of these different women, one woman against a multitude. No wonder she came up short.
Girls/women are much more affected by this. They compare themselves to others nonstop. That's why social media is especially terrible for girls and young women.
Interesting
A lot, I would say most even, women do that and have forever. Social medai just made it easier to compare themselves to the best parts of EVERY other woman they have ever met. Blokes can do this too, but no where near the same rate. Men dont care as much.
Hugs to her. That phase sucked for me. Just validate that the voices telling her she isn't good enough are indeed really loud. And that you see her as lovely and support whatever her small spirit wants for her day. Her will for herself is correct and matters. Just keep going with a fresh attitude every day and trust the process.
@@mkmdowns I did, yes. I have lost contact with her though :) I am aware of what people go through. Even if I am probably less prone to have that feeling, it does help to have a healthy minded partner.
As someone significantly older than Chris, I strongly recommend you do not ditch your friends to move to a new life. Do whatever you need to do in life, but do not consciously ditch anyone. Do your best to stay in touch with those who are willing. New friends become harder and harder to come by as you get older, and there is nothing better than old friends.
I might not speak to a friend for years, they are still a friend and if I do speak to them or see them after years, then it’s like we hadn’t seen each other for a week and straight back into it. That’s different to purposely ditching people. I tend to listen to Chris and the Trig team and others and take certain things away but not necessarily all of them.
Maybe Chris is the problem, I know his type, the sort that grift on the Self Help bandwagon and look down upon their normal mates and see it as there are holding them back... right okay
I'm not sure that Chris is saying to ditch your friends. I think what he means that you might see your friends less or maybe not at all if you go down a different. For example, the mate who will you only see in the pub won't meet up for a coffee.
He's stating that it's likely your old group will inevitably be lost. Not always the case but it happens to a lot of people. That old group of friends sitting on the front steps drinking all afternoon isn't exactly condusive to personal flourishment.
I think it is be prefaced he was referring to a very specific situation
If you work like 18-20 hours like Elon musk with an obsession it's likely a few people in your life will drop along the way
Great conversation lads. Anyone who encourages a positive mindset and not a victim mentality gets a vote from me.
He has a victim mentality. He cherry picks stories almost always related to women and then whines about women. Quite literally says ‘let’s talk about men and male mental health’ and then spends most of the time talking about women.
@cantbendknee Tell me you haven't listened to Chris without telling me you haven't listened to Chris.
@@Ruprecttt Another smug Chris listener. I actually did listen because I thought he sounded like he was similar to Tim Ferris absolutely not, no where near the level of Ferris. No life experience to speak of and that's why he brings up working in a night club over and over again and regurgitates information and quotes learned off by heart. He should speak about men and male problems instead of trying to distract away to women.
From a 50+ aged woman. Thank you guys for having our young mens backs. I worry about suicide rates. I feel sad for the loss of their potential. I used to coach sport and self belief is our corner-stone.
I’m a 26 year old man and had a best friend die to suicide a few years back. Just thinking of how we were as kids makes me wish something had been different in his life. He was a dark kind of kid, got into drugs too early and became cynical as a young teen. Turns out he was struggling with being gay. He died about 10 years ago and I still think of him. Rip Brad I wish things turned out better. Hope I get to see you again someday
Great that Chris is getting interviewed for a change. He credits Peterson a lot for how he's impacted people's lives. Chris probably underestimates the positive impact he's had on people's lives. 🙏
Yes, and looking in these comments right now, there's a ton of people that have let what he's said fly right by them. Pederson or Williamson.
aa lot of insecure young men these days :/
@@chancegreenisdeadunderstandably especially in the UK which I attribute to Blairite policies.
Hes just like Peterson, He says this fluff that sounds good, but really doesnt mean anything, and isnt right.
But most people dont even notice because they dont analyize it. THey just sort of use it as a generic motivational speech.
I went to Nepal when I was 20 and almost died, became a Buddhist, started meditating and doing yoga, and when I got back to college and my old friends I lived with I felt like an alien. I remember sitting in my room while they partied and heard them mocking me for meditating. It was a great gift as I was trying to live in two worlds and I decided to move out and was lonely as hell, but no one mocking me for healthy choices.
Having been homeless at 16 myself I really relate to Konstantin's story. I too had that rock bottom, never again moment.
I have always been grateful for that. As weird as it seems to others. I am glad it happened so young too.
It taught me that I CAN get myself out of a crisis and knowing that fact changed my whole outlook.
I knew I could be my own guardian and in the driving seat of my own life.
A priceless experience.
Congrats and well done. I think the story that Konstantin was quoting is not something that happened to him personally - but to someone else. Konstantin comes from a wealthy family (he went to private school). So don’t compare yourself to others just focus on your own success ❤❤
Well, at 16 thats not your fault, unless you were acting really, really unreasonable. Thats more your parents fault for deciding to have a kid they gave up on.
@@Scorch428 yes. Correct.
This is the one we've been waiting for! I watched Chris' ascent during the 'pandemic'. He worked hard to get where he is; it's great to see it pay off for him.
Pandemic in quotes? Didn’t millions of people die?
Damn I didn't expect you here nice to see you here
there are so many podcasters now they end up interviewing each other
As a 50 yr old single female… it was always understood that a man would not approach unless she opened the door first. It’s so easy. He looks at her in a neutral way, or says something neutral, and she smiles. Done.
Goodness me it’s all got very complicated, as a female of 55 I can promise you good banter and humour are irresistible. Dating back in the day was so much fun, hours getting ready, the excitement of someone buying you a drink, writing your number down on a beer mat and waiting for them to call, no mobiles no texts no DM’s … Old school and it was fantastic 😉
You were just Younger, dont mistake generational differences with age difference
I'm in the lonely chapter. Makes perfect sense, thanks.
I have been for ~5 years..
I'm not the man I spent my whole life ashamed of, but am seemingly stuck on the path to where I want to be & have absolutely no idea how to get out of this chapter now without going backwards.
@@c.chinaski3156 Maybe . . . a "lateral move" (?) Not _what_ you are doing . . . but _where you are doing it_ (?) Just an idea to consider. Good luck . . .
It's interesting how we're all at different stages and want different things. See I'm now happy to be in my lonely chapter. I "was" married, (I know, the stereotype, but we're just good friends now and that's why it ended), we were together from 18 till 32, my entire adult life, and I have my daughter who is 2. I just got bored of it. Now I've got zero interest in dating or relationships and just want to do what I want to do, whenever I want to do it, with no obligations for her family events or whatever. Even with some interest (and a couple hookups at work...while at work) I've just got no interest in it.
Spending my entire adult life as a boyfriend or husband, even with a decent balance that we had, has made me completely allergic to ever being in that situation again. Even for love.
Wow. Want to do, what you want to do, with no obligations….ect
I hope you set that aside for your daughter at least. It’s cool “living for you”, till you’re old & sick or injured. We’ve lived in families & communities, for a reason….
Listen, I hope you are great & continue to. I just can’t help every time I read a comment like that, ending relationships because you got bored, wanting to do just what you want to do, whenever you want to without obligations for anyone…. It makes me sad. I know you’re not. But it takes me back to time in my life when I felt the same, or so I thought…
@@candycolriv We both discussed it. In fact she was the one who raised it first saying that it feels like we've become just good friends, and I agreed said we should probably end it then as I couldn't lie to her and say I could change it. It was unlikely I'd wake up one day and be a "loving" husband again. If she wanted that then I wouldn't stand in her way.
I moved to be with her, so throughout that time I've had to compromise to fit in 'family time' with her, like visiting in-laws or whatever. I'm so glad now that I'm not longer obligated to do that. The relief I've felt since we split knowing she's visiting her family and I no longer have to go, and I can do my own thing is amazing.
My daughter means the world to me so she will always come first. But I'm never going to look for another relationship again, it's simply not worth it to me. My own free time to pursue my own hobbies and interests is way more valuable than being a boyfriend or husband.
I liked that metaphor of the icecream-doing something that makes you happy in the moment, but ultimately wouldn’t be good for you if you ate it every night. And that the modern moment is caught up in the idea that something can’t be good for you if it’s not immediately gratifying.
Honestly, I think modern aversion towards having children is tied up in that idea. How can having children be good if it means I have to do so many unpleasant things (and give up other pleasant things) right now?
I’ve had so much peace approaching parenthood in recognizing the beauty of humble things, the *necessity* of a love that can temporarily set aside personal agenda in all healthy human development, and the recognition that parenthood really is a long term service to society. If I do my job right, I’ll train values into a person who will live beyond me, and ensure those values survive atleast one more generation through them.
Not only that, but we all go from dependency, to relative independence, and back to dependency. Every breath we take, we get closer and closer to reliance on other people for meeting our needs. Eventually age will make us entirely dependent again. To raise a child well is to sustain the passing of the baton of our collective knowledge, our values, and care of others who will eventually be too vulnerable to care for themselves.
And again, if we do it right, those children will in turn have their own and do the same.
It may not *feel* good in the moment to put aside your own comfort day after day for the sake of something weaker than you, but it *is* good.
I'mdeeply greatful to Chris, Konstantin, and Francis for this interview. It finally made me realize what a complete loser and a waste of space and oxygen I truly am. I tried to fend of that realization for too long. It's time to act, to take that final step. Thank you from the bottom of my heart.
I hope this means “act” in a positive way for a change and not act out something terrible. I hope you can take the steps for positive change and see yourself in a better light soon! Hugs and well wishes to you.
its called growing up! :) and it sucks.
I utterly adore Chris Williamson. He has become somewhat of an idol to me. A genuine, honest, philosophical man amongst a sea of losers and chancers. I wish nothing but the best for him.
He always strikes me as somewhat simple minded, and I think he underrates the value of his facial attractiveness.
@@Jorbz150 perhaps he's not always the smartest man in the room, he or she I've yet to find, but at least he's not an arrogant prick
@@hotdiggityd
Bro... that's an incredibly low bar for a self-professed idol.
@@ephraimwinslow Firstly, who said that is the bar? On top of which I'm sorry that you don't understand the meaning of the word 'somewhat'.
I agree. I once thought he was just going to be a flash in the pan.
I’m in my 50’s and going through a lonely chapter. My kids are adults, I’m happy about that. A lot of my older generation family are passing away. A lot of my friends are divorcing and finding new found freedoms. I find myself being drawn to new friends that are 20 years older (having been through middle age) and 20 years younger than me because they have a youth & vitality that is energizing. I love being around their new marriages and having babies. One thing I’ve learned in 52 years, once you get comfortable & happy, you will soon be uncomfortable and seeking happy again.
I am 53 and have been getting profoundly lonelier as I get older. Everything has failed in my life. never married, no kids, no job, no friends, will always be dependent on my parents for support. I am worthless. I just wait for the end of me now, there is no hope. I am stuck living in a region I hate. And I will have absolutely nothing to do with anyone 20 years younger than me. That demographic is the WORST!!!!
"I love being around their new marriages and having babies".... UGH. I hate newlyweds and new parents. People find romance, they disappear into that little bubble and abandon their previous friends.
Marriage and romance is WORTHLESS!!!!!
comfortable and happy?.... an impossible fantasy, life only gets worse with age.
Referring to the comments on loneliness ....my tip, as someone who is happy and stable in middle age (tho single with a grown up daughter ) is to build or rebuild relationships. I have made it my business and priority during the last several years to be proactive to connecting with my family (I live in Asia but I'm British) and I have completely revitalised my social circle by running a ladies Meet Up group. One has to be proactive .there are ways to improve your life.
No wonder women initate 80% of the divorces lol. Ur lonely because u have lonely people around u.
Interesting that in some of these comments were seeing people treating Chris like a lot of conventionally attractive women have been treated for so long. Jealousy taking over and people wanting to tear him down because of it. To me, what makes Chris attractive is his desire to grow past his old life, his interest in the world around him, his desire to evolve and how great he is as an interviewer. With his looks he could easily have just stayed in a shallow life and got by on superficial pleasures but he has chosen growth. That’s attractive.
Agree he's a good person however his claim to fame is Entirely because of his attractiveness. Everyone knows him from a dating show love Island. They don't pick people for that show based on your character. Reason people may discredit him is because his claim to fame came from a show about extremely attractive people hooking up. Doesn't make him a bad person, just how he came to the spotlight
@@Crest28 He would’ve sunk back into irrelevancy without the growth he’s put in his podcast so I’m not sure what your point here is exactly.
@@Crest28 yes this is kind of my point. He could have just stayed in that lifestyle but he’s actually showing that you can be in the superficial view of ‘success’ such as being on a TV show and transcend that even though you have what it takes to be ‘someone’ in the shallow world, if that makes sense? He didn’t settle for a life all about his looks and his celebrity persona. He’s dug deep and used what he has and doing good in the world with it.
@@Crest28plenty of much more attractive men than Chris have made it to those shows, been popular and faded into obscurity. It’s his personality and hard work which has ultimately meant he has made sure to make the most of any opportunity. Your looks don’t work like magic, you still have to work very hard to be successful no matter who you are.
@@janinemelanie8391 I agree with you, his talks are genuinely great. People are also saying it's wrong to even acknowledge his looks helped him along the way. Not saying that to be Cynical, just how it happened
Chris is amazing and UA-cam is better for his presence. I cannot believe the ideas and topics I have learned about bc of Chris’s podcast. Life changers!
What he says is presented as truth but it’s opinion. The man jumping into the canal to save the woman: fact checked and his gender was mentioned. Hypergamy is nature of women: fact checked and no peer reviewed consensus exists. Women get custody of children in court: fact checked the women are behaving like the stable parent taking the children to school, clothing, feeding them etc., so they get custody. Men who approach women are accused of ‘me too’ abuse: fact checked, never heard anyone be asked in a date and do this.
This guy works really hard, I appreciate that, and his memory too
Work on a bench... really impressive...
Agreed.
You build resilience by bringing your kids to any sports class, especially martial arts, and then you show them the gym. Trust me!
"Just make yourself admirable" has he same logical error that successful entrepreneurs make when they say it is super easy to get into business. People need to understand the marketplace and have a competitive advantage, but almost nobody ever explains how to effectively create a business with a competitive advantage (except Mr Beast). Almost everybody wants to be admirable, but they think that certain traits will be admired when they just arent
One of my most used expressions is "talk yourself into it not out of it". Also when competing I say "you are gonna have to take it off me coz i aint giving it to you". Be positive guys and respect your masculinity as it isn't a disability. Loving the show.
This crossover is just perfect. Thank you for this!
Chris on Triggernometry. I didn't know I needed this, but 2 of my favorite podcasts here.
Love this, gentlemen.
Fantastic job.
I certainly do not want to spend my life worrying about all the things I am hearing.I want to have a normal uncomplicated life.
That lonely chapter is something I went through. It helped me solidify my own ideas, politics etc. Without having external influence.
if i knew all this back when i was in university, i would have spoken out! Lecturer was going on about "the male gaze" and no one of the guys had the knowledge let alone courage to counter her arguments... i truly felt crestfallen after.
Bear in mind this was art school, so of course it was and is filled to the brim with woke teachers
There’s a lot of American Therapy Jargon in this.
That's because Chris' talking points are a hodge podge of everything he's ever heard said to him in his podcasts, and half of his guests are quacks.
@@ephraimwinslowwhich guests are quacks?
I can tell you have a victim mentality@@ephraimwinslow
Yeah it's taken over the right, basically the toxic masculinity / masculinity crisis premise to explain male psychology and outcomes, just slightly rebranded. It's weird how uncritical the right is about it.
@@oraz. There's no American version of Houellebecq
Post content clarity. I agree, after a video I watched yesterday I messaged my dad to organise a chat with him and my siblings that live with him. They live far away. It is one of the best things I've done this year. It was great to catch up.
Such a great interview. What I am taking away most intimately is the story about what Lex wished his friends had said. Poignant, relatable and powerful. I will try to implement this in my own life. and relationships.
Encouragement and praise can help, but willpower is ultimately internal and all the praise and encouragement in the world can't move willpower if the individual is unwilling. It's motivation versus willpower/discipline. It's good to have both no doubt. It's just that internal validation and willpower are where it starts and are independent of external validation.
I often encourage and praise people, so don't get me wrong.
Fantastic interview -- loved getting to hear a deep dive into Chris's influences, thoughts, motivations, etc.
Regarding numerous comments saying "Come on guys, we all know ugly dudes who manage to get girlfriends easily because of their confidence" No, actually, I don't. Most of you probably don't meet or talk to ugly people. You talk to people who don't look as attractive as the average celebrity, and you think the average celebrity is "average". What I've actually seen in real life is the same thing that research on the Matching Hypothesis has always shown; You can predict the amount of dates a person is able to get purely by looking at their ratings of physical attractiveness by the opposite sex. This is true for both men and women.
If you think Chris gives good advice, you are probably above average looking.
And no, simply being thin and getting a haircut wouldn't make everyone attractive. Not everyone has hair, not every guy can grow a beard, not every skin condition is curable, some jawlines are just underdeveloped and removing fat doesn't change their shapes. A small chin doesn't grow into a large chin due to exercise in adulthood, even if you exercise the face, because bone growth and remodeling slows down rapidly in the early 20s. These are all things you would be aware of and have studied if you were ACTUALLY ugly. Many of you probably thought you understood what being ugly meant because you were bullied in middle school before your face - oh, I mean personality - grew into something more attractive. Such changes are largely gifts from God, and if you don't have any mutations or disorders or skin conditions then you should be thankful and not attribute that to your own accomplishment.
This is one of the best interviews you've ever done.
Wonderful! Chris is a very talented interviewer who has an amazing ability to sum up his guest’s arguments and ask very pertinent questions.
Confidence isn't a single step process either. But once you get it it's fun.
This is a triple dose of positivity, great chat.
Is blaming women for men’s problems positive now?
@@cantbendknee Lovely summary you gave there, close to a summary execution of this whole interview.
EXACTLY my reaction. The just can't see it, can they? I don't know why I persist listening to these guys. Triumph of hope over experience, I guess.@@cantbendknee
What an interesting conversation. Three intelligent guys .
Konstanin is. I dunno about the other 2. Theyre charismatic guys.
I consider myself like Konstantin, only I have a little more compassion for those who try.
I think if you can keep a job that you work 40 hours a week, you should be guaranteed basic needs like a place to live and food by the society you live in. And I dont care if the govt has to tax rich people more to do it. If you are contributing to society in a meaningful way, even if youre a janitor, you should be able to have some dignity. A simple place to rent and food to eat. And alot of families cant even afford that. When you grow up, you realize the world is dog eat dog, even America. It puts out this fake sense of the American Dream, but it reality, its take what you can take, and fuck everyone else. I wish less people were like that.
Thank you for this. Two worlds collide here. There is so much wisdom from both sides here. Great interview.
Really is food for thought.
"Monogamish, where when the kid is 3-7 they're sufficiently autonomous that you can move on to another partner..."
...Who has a more than 10x tendency to abuse that child from the previous relationship. The "wicked stepmother" or brutal stepfather, is an archetype for a reason.
"Monogamish" is a black-pill, Chris, don't think otherwise.
Very good! Love Chris, improved me a lot. Thank you
700K subs - well done guys - been brilliant watching you grow and grow. well deserved
What was said at 27:50 is really true, with a lot of free time. "Idle hands are the devil's workshop."
1:11:10 The guy is named Albert Ellis. Didn't make CBT but was a pioneer in it.
Enjoyed the tips that Chris gave at the end, scientifically backed and quite practical!
1. Create/Find a small tribe, near you that is into self-improvement and accountability.
2. Overcome Approach Anxiety via CBT and Exposure Therapy. Immersion is your ally.
(Ladies be more receptive if you want to be approached. Approaching is scary, so give it an easy barrier if you want to be approached.
3. Find a location where your skillsets are valued. Also, it's good to live in a place where there is less of your sex. That way you have the advantage in the dating market.
Great stuff guys!
The last time I dated, I was 45 years old and was approached by a lot of 33-36 year old men who seemed genuinely interested in meeting me. This was a BIG change from 10 years previous. I assumed they'd made a mistake or hadn't noticed my age but they doubled down and said they were interested. I was so confused at the time, but in the past couple of years the reason has become clear as I read and listen to more of these types of talks. It makes me sad. Male friends in my age group (late 40s/early 50s) who are single are miserable because they feel they can't have the same conversations with women that they used to, and they are NOT trying to date younger women. It's like a cancer.
Men get your passports, you are not obligated to fix or help a society that villainizes and demonizes you. There are cultures that appreciate men and where you can thrive and create strong,healthy,loving relationships and community. Let the west burn and get your passport. Don't waste your time trying to save it.
I wonder what advice someone who looks so good they were on ‘Love Island’ has to say to the average man about … confidence.
Generally speaking attractive men attribute their success in romance to behaviors. Attractive women are usually more aware of why they're attractive.
I have mostly found conventionally men to be boring, I dated a couple of guys not much taller than me because of their sense of humor and personality. Some men get fixated on looks and use that as an excuse to not work out, not work hard and not develop their personalities. Their failures than are a self-fulfilling prophecy.
What makes you think attractive men always have self confidence? Just like really attractive women they’re usually really self conscious because all their value is attributed to something they didn’t do or achieve
The point about Huberman is so spot on i fell for that and it wiped me away. Now i am picking myself from the ground and i will start easy.
This was a great conversation. A lot of wisdom to be gleaned from this discussion.
A couple years ago I started to reaize how alone I felt in a crowd of people. I didn't think other people felt that way, I assumed it was unique. But over the years i've heard many other people say that, and Chris expressed that he has felt that way.
Another reminder that i'm just another person:)
In a good way 😉
Great guy. One of the best podcasts “Modern wisdom”
Thank you gentlemen. This was a podcast that I needed to hear in this moment. Thoroughly enjoyed this one.
I love the modern wisdom podcast! Me and Chris are the same age and I relate to soooo many things he talks about and experiences he's had as he's grown into his 30s and dove into mindset!!!
It's true! I think a lot of us get close to our 30s and we feel more lost and frustrated than ever before because the world we were promised was such a falsehood and as we grow and truly begin to understand ourselves, we realize that we create the world we want. Not the other way around! And we move into a quality over quantity state!!
Be good looking and rich
Great episode, thanks guys!
Refreshing to hear Chris sharing something that I've been feeling recently regarding over-optimising life. I'm trying to stay off Huberman podcasts(and others) recently, It feels like the over-optimisation sucks all the joy out of living. Huberman has such good insights and I learned a lot from his podcasts in the past, but the positives came with negatives(over-optimising, not enjoying life, etc). I wish there would be a middle ground in how science is communicated with maybe a bit more nuance and less narrow views on various subjects. There are no absolutes in life, why make it sound like there are? Again, thanks for a great episode! All the best!
Yes, I immediately remember from early in this conversation about how "taking care of yourself" and "loving yourself" would for example be about forcing yourself to exercise even when you don't want to etc.
I think that is how you suck the joy out of living.
I for example, don't enjoy forcing myself to workout because I believe it eventually will give me some lofty goal I dream of, I just do it enough so I don't feel miserable.
So, don't overdo stuff, and try something else a bit if you're curious.
And if you have friends who want to do something specific with you and you don't want to lose contact with them, stick to that activity sometimes just for the sake of contact or be honest that you just don't find the time but don't mind the company.
The way I see it, if finding and knowing friendly, easygoing people was somewhat easy then most people would be motivated, spurred, forward-looking, outgoing etc.
But that isn't how it usually works, people are cautious for various reasons, about what they do with their time and who they spend it with, for good reason perhaps, but possibly a bit overdone as well.
Thank goodness someone finally said it! You need to find a balance! Thank you for writing this! I think it is so important not to be perfectionist and idealistic about this stuff.
What a great guy Chris is, his comment on CBT was hysterical
Best sign-off ever! Thanks Francis!
This is even super motivating for me as a woman!
Are you a bot?
@@cantbendknee why do you think that?? 😂
There are so many echo's in this discussion. I was dragged up in a working class home. Treated and beaten like sh*t. I have completely escaped the mindset that I had as a child, i.e. I am worthless and life is pointless. I am listening to this whilst working on our home in England, that I have completely rebuilt and extended. I have an amazing wife, successful sons and on track to get permanent residency in Sweden where I work as a heath and safety specialist. I am 58.
That was exactly what i needed to hear from Chris.
Also. One of the best parts of Joe Rogan is that he is not interrupting his guest to "crack a joke". They sounds like a revenge of people pleasing of the host.
In life, you should always, “hope for the best, but prepare for the worst!”
fantastic, as usual ! 🤗 1:09:50 when I met my boyfriend at the end of 2017 I had to make the first move because I noticed he was lost in this equation... but from the first minute we met, I knew we liked each other ☺
Props.
That is lovely!
She is not yours it just your turn 💊
Chris will never hold women accountable regardless of the divorce stats.
Chris is truly inspiring
I respect the healthy, balanced talk about masculinity
"just be out in the world doing stuff" is not the solution. From 18 to 29 I went out all the time. When I went and socialized with women or men I didnt know, there was always a value judgment happening and I wasnt faring well in that calculation. That is exactly the point that men give up. It is nice to think that the people with no success are not trying as is the narrative of Gen Z, but I doubt that is a valid assumption to make at all. Men are likely giving up earlier because they are being cast aside more harshly within the communities they are a part of
Correct
It is the solution. You have to be out in the world doing stuff, being receptive to improvement even when the point to correct isn't clear, and be willing to connect with people. You are the only thing within your control. You can't change the other people, you can only change how you communicate with them.
It's just the self help attitude. It's the same narrative for everyone, doesn't matter who you are: find out what people like and change in order to be more like that. That's it. It obviously doesn't work but until someone keeps the narrative going and making money out of it it won't stop
Agree mindset is extremely important and Confidence will lead to success. Having said that, very attractive people will have a Significantly Easier time gaining confidence vs a person who is not attractive. Its not Cynical or mean to say that, just how human nature is.
A physically attractive person will also have an easier time getting romantic attention, regardless of other personality traits. This has been well-established in research for decades.
That truth isn’t a reason to give up and not work out, work hard and develop your personality.
@@viviennedunbar3374 Thought experiment: would you say that to someone . . . even if you knew they were going to fail (?) For example, if you knew (but they did not) they had a fatal illness that would kill them within 5 years (?) I myself don't know the answer to that . . .
@QED_ there are other ugly people. If you are really sure that you are ugly, work out who is out of your league and who are your equivalents & go for people in your league. Chemistry really increases attractiveness. Love & sex is not necessarily our of bounds (maybe just don't reproduce 😂)
Great interview. Chris is so learned in life and its dimensions. He is a philosopher and a great positivity beamer. Thanx folks.
Chris is a very interesting and compelling person. I just look at him and go "Phwoooooar! Woof woof!!!".....Then I darken my screen, pop in my ear buds and listen to all the amazing things he says!!! I recommend it.
🔥 People don’t want to HEAR this because they want their excuses
Maybe. But here's a thought experiment: would you say that to someone . . . even if you knew they were going to fail (?) For example, if you knew (but they did not) they had a fatal illness that would kill them within 5 years (?) Me (?) l don't know the answer to that . . .
Love these humans. Can't wait for this!
This was a really, really good one. Listened to it twice as a result.
I throughly enjoyed that interview very freshing to listen such a rational and insight person.....well done guys
Illuminating and entertaining - this Trig is one of the best.
Masculinity is positive; it's our perspectives and practices that are toxic. Much love to the fine gentlemen here today. 💪❤
great that Triggernometry had him on yeah!
@@linus8247 Absolutely! 💯 I really admire the hosts of both shows. Tremendously good content and enjoyable presentations all around. 💥✨️😊
Talking about positive masculinity implies it needs to be changed. Chris is a pundit for the toxic masculinity premise. just slightly rebranded to the right. I'm surprised everybody accepts that.
Youll get to a million subscribers with this one! Ive personally forwarded it to half a million great guys.
it was a great interview. Thanks guys. Good title too. Said I was just going to watch a few minutes and ended up watching it to the end. All of the topics covered felt very important. Also I find it a good sign that someone is pausing to find the right word. It is more likely that geniunine thinking is taking place. And when you use something the ohter person said, especially when the conversation already moved on to another subject.
Another awesome interview! So many gold nuggets 💛
"your boos mean nothing I've seen what makes you cheer" -Rick and Morty 38:00
I wasn't expecting that but that was fairly accurate way to think about the people who put you down or hold you back.
Comparison is the thief of Joy.. it's so true.
Three of my favorite men! Great job guys! I hope you do it again.
The best interpretation of alchemy ...ever. ❤ brilliant
I don't buy this idea that in order to be successful you have to abandon your friends and supplant them with newer more successful ones as some kind of life rule (in fact I think thats a crock of shit). I've had the same group of friends my entire life, many of them since I was 4 years old, and I am in my 40s now. We have all moved in different directions, have had different successes, failures, tragedies, mindsets, political views, careers etc. But we always come back together. Because we are family. Loyalty and honour is among the most positive aspects of masculinity, and this talking point about essentially leaving people you care about behind as if it's a requirement for moving your life forward is the antithesis of it.
Mmmm
This seems like luxury philosophy to me. If you have no real problems, you can obsess about yourself.
Okay, there's truth in that. But . . . do you also acknowledge that there's useful "non-luxury" philosophy (?) And how do you personally tell the difference . . . (?)
aye
Volunteering witj ypur kids is great for them (and you) to feel appreciation for wjat we have
Oh my gooood, what a good point about overoptimisation and not being able to function without getting a b and c done!! I am indeed a victim of that and it has been so terribly frustrating. Dammit, thanks Chris.
Misandry isn't confined to Hannah Gadsby, but rather unfortunately is a common trait of a great deal of Australian women.
Always nice to see Chris :)
Great talk and quite refreshing ❤
The best best BEST ending ever to a trig episode EVER!
Great guy. 💚
best episode ive seen so far wow
That was fun. I like the comment about having UA-cam videos make you feel good and even improved.
Well done!
Loved the episode. Love Chris and his podcast. His skills feel like when an introvert reaches their highest level of actualisation.
Re the child rearing, read Proverbs. And by read I mean study (as is always the case with the Bible). I’m childless but when I’m not, that’s what I’ll grab for.
fantastic interview guys. TBH I sometimes consider this channel that empty calorie content for me, particularly going down the trans rabbit hole. Not that it is bad content, just that for me I think I have passed the point of information-gathering-to better-form-an-opinion, and now I'm in the "let's see how much I can get outraged" phase. But this one is quite motivating.
Gonna work on that novel tonight instead of listening to youtube.
Love Chris ❤
Great talk, thanks heaps
A great discussion!
Can anyone tell me why I should listen to this guy? He was just on Love Island for a while... what else has he done?
He's done a really good job of piggybacking off of smart people's talking points to build an audience, only to repeatedly demonstrate that he's internalized none of the talking points in question.
Well, he has good genes… Don’t know what else
@@ephraimwinslowAKA a Grifter.
more than you
@@ephraimwinslowbased
Love to hear from these motivational speakers that owe everything to the genetic lottery.
Thought experiment, would a 5'5" balding Chris Williamson be a motivational speaker? I don't think so either.
James Clear does pretty well at 5'7" (*ish) as does Joe Rogan, they seem pretty confident and have managed to become super successful without winning the genetic lottery. There's no doubt good looks help, but they're not everything.
No you don't.
@@tempsoda eh, neither of those guys are unattractive though, which is what I think he's implying. Rogan was pretty handsome when he was younger, enough to be on TV, and that other guy I don't know but I googled him and I'd say he's above average easily with a good jaw/chin.
Sure they're not 6ft 8 Mr Olympia's, and bald (I think balding he means the pedo cut not just being bald) but 5'7-5'9 with above average looks isn't really losing either. 5'5ft ish is starting to get under average woman height
@@RifleEyez I'd agree, I think they are both pretty attractive guys, but that wasn't mentioned specifically. (...Ok I realise that's a technicality!)
My point is, I don't think being super attractive is necessarily a prerequisite for success or confidence. Nor is it enough to earn you the type of respect amongst your intellectual peers that Chris seems to have obtained.
Also I'd add Neil Strauss to my list, he's 5'6" and most people would agree he doesn't have an inherent genetic advantage although I'm sure he understands the importance of making the best of what he's got. Plus, no offence but the hosts of this show aren't being scouted as the next top male models, they seem to be doing just fine 😂
Chris explains the “ heroes journey “ beautifully 🙏
This interview far surpassed my expectations, which I thought were unreasonably high.