Brenna Twohy - Anxiety: A Ghost Story
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- Опубліковано 17 жов 2024
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Brenna Twohy, performing at NPS 2015 in Oakland, CA.
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"To love me is to love a haunted house. It's fun to visit once a year but no one wants to live there."
Melissa Armendariz I was at that point when I read your comment no joke
Allison Escarcega Same lmao, what's happening ?
"To love me is to love a haunted house...no one wants to live there."
hey I was the 1000th like yw♡♡
🤠✊🏻
"when you say 'tell me about the bad days,' sounds like all the neighborhood kids daring each other to ring the doorbell"
damn. i felt that so hard.
How hard?
"Darling, this love will not cure me." so powerful
Halley Perisi
I read this right when she said it
"That my anxiety is a camera that shows everyone I love as bones" SO true. Well said.
What does that even mean? Pz tell me I'm confused 😢
How are these people clapping, I'm sitting here breathless trying to compose myself because I felt it so much
+horsecrazy2266 me too - with tears in my eyes.
I'm sitting in class trying not to laugh. 😂
***** Is it funny? Or do you just nervous laugh as energy, I do that too
horsecrazy2266 Nervous laugh, I can relate so easily to this. And my axiety is really bad.
+horsecrazy2266 Plus I also have a really bad habit of laughing when I'm nervous or uncomfortable. Idk why I laugh when I'm nervous or uncomfortable, I just do.
This made me cry. Living with anxiety is incredibly hard, and explaining it to others can be impossible. This was beautifully written. Thank you for this.
English3Muffin I feel you
"When you say to the ghost, 'If you're staying, then you better make room'." -this kills me
We have got to talk about the kids in all those Goosebumps books. For
example, if your family vacation is to an amusement park called
Horrorland, and your station wagon explodes in the parking lot upon
arrival, maybe shrugging it off, buying an extra-large popcorn and
heading directly to the Deadly Doom Slide is not your best possible
course of action. Or, if you steal a weird camera from your creepy
neighbour's basement and all the pictures you take show bad things
happening, like decapitation and also tofurkey. Stop. Taking.
Pictures.Or, if you move into your ne house and there's a bunch of small
children already living in your bedroom that your parents can't see,
maybe don't just grab a juice box and go to play in the cemetery that
is in your backyard. Or, when I tell you I have a cemetery in my
backyard, and in my front yard, and in my bedroom, when I tell you that
trauma is a steep slide you cannot see the bottom of, that my anxiety is
a camera that shows everyone I love as bones, when I tell you that
panic is a stubborn phantom, that she will grab onto me and not let go
for months, this is the part of the story where everyone is telling you
to run. To love me is to love a haunted house. It's fun to visit once a
year, but no one wants to live there. And when you say, "Tell me about
the bad days," it sounds like all the neighbourhood kids daring each
other tp ring the doorbell. And you love me like the family walking
through Horrorland holding hands. You are not stupid, or careless, or
even brave. You've just never seen the close-up of a haunting. Darling,
this love will not cure me. This love will not scrape the blood from the
baseboards, but it will turn all the lights on. It will bring basil
back from the Farmer's Market and it will plant it in every windowsill.
It is the kind of love that gives me goosebumps. When you say to the
ghost, "If you're staying, then you'd better make room," and we kiss
against the walls that, tonight, are not shaking, so we turn the music
up, and we dance to Miles Davis, and you say, "My god. This house. The
way that it stands even in the months that no one goes into or comes out
of it." How reckless. The way that I love, like the first chapter of a
ghost story, like a gentle hand reaching out of a grave.
Aria Mortenson i love u
+
thank u so much!!! u saved me
U skipped a few words but this is dedication
Aria Mortenso
I was loudly sobbing by the end of this. I have severe anxiety and I have always had this tragic character flaw of assuming I'm unlovable. Well, for the first time I finally found someone who truly loves my haunted house and you cannot begin to imagine how much I related to this poem. As soon as I came I will be showing him this. ❤️
Can*
that's so beautiful
I have the same problem I live with anxiety all the time... Can I ask you how can you do that??? .. I mean I have some that I like and he likes me too but I get in a extremely anxiety when Im around him i can't talk because I think im going to puke i don't want him around me because im afraid that he notice my anxiety and see me like as a crazy person I'm afraid of getting to love him Im afraid that he likes me because he look at me i think he somehow is going to know I'm afraid that if we date we are going to eat together and my anxiety dont let me eat in another place that isn't home.... Im afraid my insecurities make problem in our relationship... Thats why i dont want him to like me because i can't even talk to him... How can you been in a relationship? Without afraid?
Ririchiyo Mitzutani thats so upsetting
+Ririchiyo Mitzutani I don't know if we're the same way... For me, learning how to love someone else meant discovering who I am. Once I found that, I had to be okay with showing myself to other people. Vulnerability is the only way to form strong relationships. You choose to either show yourself to someone and risk losing him or you never find a full sense of trust with that person. If he can't accept everything about you, you don't need to date him.
My Anxiety is like a person. Comes with traits and bad things. Mine is bland. It's has black hair with a fringe. Gauges. A white shirt. Black jeans. Dark blue eyes. Anxiety is like a bully. It may not always talk to you but will pop up at random moments ruining your day. Anxiety is like a judgemental person making you question every little thing you do. Anxiety is like a child calling you names, but not knowing it hurts. Anxiety is like a friend. Like on who helps you decide your hair, makeup and clothes. Anxiety is a person who doesn't leave you alone.
Anxiety is like s car. But yours the scratching post
*cat
her little stutter near the end
Ironically enough, this performance makes me love her more.
'To love me is to love a haunted house' goddamn 😦😍
She kills it every fucking time
"and when you say 'tell me about the bad days' it sounds like all the neighbourhood kids daring each other to ring the doorbell."
This made me cry. I just found these Button Poetry videos and I love them. They are so empowering. Most of all they can help those who might not understand the struggle that people who suffer from anxiety, depression, OCD, eating disorders, and any other type of mental illness face every minute of every day. Maybe these videos will open the eyes of the people who do not believe these disorders are illnesses but simply problems that we have created ourselves in order to get attention and to have people feel sorry for us. Having anxiety is not just being nervous and having depression isn't just being sad. They are things that can control your entire life. I wish mental illness was just a made up thing but it's not.
"anxiety is a camera that shows everyone I love as bones"
wow
Does anyone else think there needs to be a website like Rap Genius but for poems?
Many poems from this channel are actually on Genius!
You could upload them as well as many users on Genius have!
"The kind of Love that gives me Goosebumps"
My favorite line. Gets me every time.
I have been coming back to this poem for 5 years now and it has never disappointed
If this had been me reciting poetry in front of an audience, I'd have gone crazy with anxiety. I'm glad she was able to do it.
Your love won't cure me but your hate is killing me.
I teared up a bit. I can relate so much and I just. Thank you for putting it into words.
I had been watching another slam poetry performance before this appeared in my recommended videos, and after watching this I cannot understand how is it that this performance hasn't gotten so (so) many more views. I feel like so many people would be able to relate to this. The title caught my attention because "anxiety" and as a person who has to force herself to sleep at night in order to avoid my own ghosts and demons, I felt inclined to check this video out. And it was so, so worth it. This video everyone - this video, with every sentence she said, I mumbled "it's me. she's like me." and it's so /so/ good to have someone talk about something that you yourself cannot put into words.
"To love me is to love a haunted house." this is the line that got me completely hooked. Don't get me wrong, I was hooked from the start because every time I watch a "horror" movie I find the excessive need to shout at the characters to tell them that they should /not/ pick up the god damn haunted camera, that they should /not/ go into that freaky creepy haunted house ALONE - but that line, that's the one that made me shiver because it shook me to the core, it got to me so strongly. And then, near the end, "And we dance to Miles Davis." repeated twice - that was it, that was the part where I started letting out some tears because damn, she gets it.
+Rose M Too right. I'm crying.
0:01 to 3:12 are my favorite part.
I love Brenna Twohy
Wow, just wow. This is such an amazing work.
Something that can seem impossible to explain to those who wish to love you, yet she handled it so beautifully.
Thank you so much Brenna.
I knew this was going to make me cry, and yep success. These are words I never knew I needed and now want to memorize.
I came across this immediately after having a panic attack having to do with my own paranoia about my relationship with my boyfriend. He was fantastic about the whole thing, and shout out to the lovers like him who basically say,"Fuck you anxiety, I love her/him more".
Thank you for letting me feel through this.
"When you say to the ghosts 'if you're staying, then you better make room'"
When she says darling, that melt my heart~
This one always gets me. Many times I've listened to it thinking im good. But every time I feel the break and I cry it shows me I still have more work to do.
I will forever love this poem though
This starts so simple and funny and it's like "oh yeah, what a nice light poem" and then there's just a slide down in tone that just keeps going down further and aawwwwww man you tricked me into FEELING SO MANY THINGS! That was amazing!
her delivery is phenomenal. her voice too. goodness. this poem is brilliant.
I'm in tears. This needed to be said. I suffer from anxiety myself and this really hits hard.
This is one of the most beautiful poems I've ever heard. As a writer I am inspired by it. And as a person living with anxiety disorder it speaks to me like almost nothing else has in my life. Thank you Brenna, thank you so much.
Brenna Twohy has always had the most inspiring words. I can never remember not loving the sound of her voice and her words.
This has got to be the eighth time i've watched this and I have yet to find a poem that sends shivers down my spine as much of this one. It just explains exactly how i feel. What a genius. What an artist.
Brought me to tears .... Anxiety is so very difficult to explain to people who have never experienced it and this has done a wonderful job . Thank You .
I have no words. Everything about this sure hits home.
I have been searching for this for a long time!!! Just her voice amd the way she says "To Love Me"
Ugh Brenna I feel a peace in my heart after listening to your poem. I know there's so many other people out there with anxiety, but sometimes I feel like I'm alone, that I'm the only one who feels trapped in their own body. Everyone else seems "normal" to me and I feel like I try so hard to keep myself together most of the time. For me, it feels as though I'm physically here but mentally stuck with the traumatized mind & negative emotions of my childhood self. You meant to show me the inside of yourself, & I felt like it was written about me. Listening to this poem felt like someone is stuck inside the haunted house with me. How we look at our life is very sad, I would not wish this on anyone. Thank you for sharing & here's to hoping one day we'll be free
I'm going to cry. I get anxiety and I feel like a burden to people all the time. This poem hit so close to home. So much love.
this poem still hits me hard. anxiety is so hard to explain to people who dont struggle with it like i do and this did it beautifully.
"walls that tonight are not shaking"
‘This love will not cure me but it will turn all the lights on’ ❤️❤️❤️
Brenna Twohy. That poem, Anxiety A Ghost Story was brilliant. I live with anxiety, depression, and sex addiction. Your poem was just inspirational as hell. I live that life and its chaotic. Thank you thank you thank you!!! Don't stop doing what you do!
Caught in chaotic silence
Certainly uncertain
Uncomfortably comfortable
Stuck in a cycle of meaninglessness
Void of character
Stripped of soul
Trying to communicate
Desperate not to convey
The state of dismay
Alone...
Yearning for existence
I'm...i'm
I can't breathe
I'm gagged by a sentence
A.. A word
" anxiety"
My debilitating flaw
Exposed by society
I am bare
I'm.... i'm...
Please look away
I have nothing to say
I'm just an imaginary figment
A skeleton with a pigment
Lower you gaze
Don't utter a word
Don't overwhelm me with a phrase
I... I need to
Figure something out
Hold that goddamn phone
Pretend to type
Plug them in
Get into that hype
Listen to marley
That heavenly floyd
Forget yourself
All by yourself
The worst lie i tell myself
Is " believe in yourself "
Be who you are
Nobody's perfect
Go on, go on
It's not that far
I'm just a step away
Wait..wait
Stop
I
I
can't
Spartan 450 ml this is amazing💕
wow i love this
I love that she says can not and do not. It makes her voice sound even better and more emphasis on what she's saying.
I've read all those Goosebumps. I have SAD and GAD and PTSD. I love her.
When you have an anxiety disorder, reclusiveness happens too easily. You begin haunting your own house, stuck in a limbo of redundancy to where you're unsure of measured time.
this is my favourite poem ever i relate so hard i understand exactly what she means
I thought this was kinda silly to begin with, but then the stuff about the camera and love turning all the lights on.
Wow - I totally relate. I'm watching it again.
I cried, because it's the first time someone can describe something that feels haunting, so beautifully
I'm crying and I have goosebumps.. why does my life have to relate to this so much
I’ve got chills. I felt this on every level
Thank you!
This is one of the most beautiful poems I've ever heard.
I broke down in tears through half...
It changed so much, so fast. It started with laughs, and got so deep and dark, and the audience was dead silent. That moment meant something extraordinary.
I love the way she connected it all
This is my favorite. I love the way she performs, and oh the words 😍
Her poems are always amazing
I resonant with this.
i've never loved a poem as much as this one.
She had such a beautifully smooth transition from describing the horror movies, to making it about her anxiety ❤️
I've never heard Brenna before this ... wow she is amazing! I think one of the reasons I love dark fiction and horror... especially the kids stuff, is because it gives me some sense of control and makes it fun and endurable... I can close a book or turn off the TV and the "horror" is over. I guess I wish controlling the ghost of anxiety without hiding in fear was as easy.
I love Brenna so much.
I am breathless.... this is wow.... wow.
This blew me away, I've got shivers.
Nailed it.
I've struggled with crippling anxiety for a few years, and I wish I could find a way to explain it to others. There's no way I could do something like this because I'd probably just end up dry heaving into a microphone for three minutes.
her poetry is the best
This honestly made me cry
It is hard for me to understand poems but after reading some of these comments and analysis with my own brainstorming, I finally understood what the true meaning behind this poem was about and I completely relate. It was really touching, and saddening too.
I love this poem. It is very relatable and true to how I feel everyday.
breathtakingly flawless
my anxiety was too much for the person I wanted to love. But it taught me not to waste my time with someone who doesn't want to try and love all of me not just the me on the good days. But the part of me that makes everything a challenge.
It's just like...how can you not love her?
This woman is ttooooooo gooooood !!!!
jeez i love this girl.
Why did I just cry
this always makes me a little teary.
THIS. 💕💕💕💕 In tears. Wow, wish I could like more than once.
This is it. The best thing I've heard today.
Oh I love Brenna Twohy.
I have never heard something so beautiful
I'm sobbing.. Wow.
I heard goosebumps and instantly liked.
This hits me in so many levels.
I had social anxiety and her line of 'no one coming in or out for months' is so true. I was able to function, but just barely. I was able to go to school everyday, but it is not healthy to plan in your head how you will stand up and walk off the school bus. It is not healthy to hold your breath in the halls for fear of making noise. It is not healthy to feel yourself detaching, it is not shyness that made my heartbeat increase, my limbs shake, and my palms sweat. It was an illness. But they only commented on how shy of a person I was. And that is also true, but that was not shyness that was a sickness. I lost friends, ignored at lunch facing aimlessly in front of me while they turned into each other discussing countless things. It is not fair to put blame or hate on them, but how lonely I felt was killing me. I tried to interact but it felt to helpless I felt the urge to go completely mute. I am better now, but anxiety slowly will build up throughout some days, and I feel like exploding. Things do get better though, never give up on yourself. You are your own home, even if it is a ghost home. It is the one home that will carry you through life and harber you to rest and recover from dauntless tasks. Good luck!
Tahoe Bryant That does sound very concerning, if this is interrupting your life (which it sounds to be)then I believe you should view it seriously. Personally I did end up seeing a counselor for my anxiety though I never was officially diagnosed we would discuss my anxiety at every meeting. I would recommend you look for counselling services in your area if that is a fincial possibility for you. However some things that really helped me as a take away from my counseling was clenching my hands, feet (whole body basically). To do this just tense your muscles up and hold for a moment, then suddenly release. This action will help to physically relieve some tension on the outside which is better than being anxious both physically and mentally. Also take deep breaths, this is so important. Breathing is needed to live, so when you start tensing up and stop breathing in regularly it further causes your body to panic (most likely I am guessing, I haven't personally researched this). Taking deep breathes will calm down your heart, blood pressure, and help you to view the situation at hand more realistically. Then the hardest aspect of recovery for me was my mindset. I viewed people as constantly out to get me, always expecting me to be perfect in every single aspect. However when you say these thoughts that are causing you self doubt out loud, you realize how harsh that is. No one is perfect. If that is still hard to understand, imagine saying whatever self judging/degrading thoughts you say to yourself on repeat to your family members etc. As well judging every single person closely to see if they make a mistake. Realistically for most people they could care less if you came into school/work (insert whatever you are in fear of judgment for), and they don't have to time to focus on anyone but themselves to get through till the end of the day. Social anxiety robs you of life, because you spend every waking moment in an anxious state, that isn't living that is being constantly on flight mode. It is draining and taxing to your body. With social anxiety it can be very hard to reach out for help, but tell someone you trust, look for creative outlets, try to start to integrating slowly back into non-mandatory human interactions. You are not alone, you can get through this. I truly with all my heart believe in you. It does take being some effort but being able to live without constant fear is so blissfully worth it, I promise you. Though it never completely goes away it becomes more manageable. Good luck!! I believe in you! :)
Tahoe Bryant Your welcome! It can seem so lonely, especially when you are terrified of people, but you are not alone in this. And I am so glad that I might of had a positive impact on some one who is going through similar horrible situations and illness that I went through once. I really am rooting for you! Also I kind of forgot to add this to my earlier reply but with noticing your mindset, try to catch yourself when you start having those unrealistic negative thoughts, try to be mindful of your mind I guess haha. It can be hard but when you notice it try to evaluate what is realistically going on, and that the other people probably are thinking of something else than what ever you are afraid they are judging you for. I just didn't clearly state this, and just wanted to quickly add it in here. Anyway good luck!
Returning to this after years of bliss
tour poem made me cry. Great Job!
added this to my liked videos as soon as she mentioned Goosebumps...
Beautiful and sublime, thank you Brenna
I was shaking listening to this. So spot on it was scary. Amazing work, dear.
You have an absolutely stunning structure to your poem, Brenna Twohy. Thank you for sharing :)
Speechless
I can't breathe, this is too relatable
why the hell does this has 53 dislikes its soooo amazing it gives me goosebumps I'm seriously in shock from how its amazing and so relatable
Such a beautiful poem, I love her poetry 🌻
I can't stop listening to this tbh
"this house the way it stands even when no own is going into it or out of it"
so dope..she killed it!!!