Love is the craving for feeling desired, feeling wanted, feeling complete. As long as your partner is filling this bottomless hole, there is joy. As soon as he or she is unable to make you feel special, there is unconsciousness. If you really want to make your love last for a lifetime, get in touch with your true essence. Love yourself without the craving of someone other making you feel joyful and complete. When two people who are enough for themselves start sharing their joy, then love without unconsciousness arises..
Here's something else - virtually EVERYTHING being done in the egoic state is an attempt to become more complete - the ego spends its whole existence trying to recreate what it feels it has lost, filling up a needy hole within itself. But this is ultimately futile. However what is done after enlightenment and awakening of being is the unfolding of the divine - the outpouring of abundance.
As Eckhart points out here, sometimes romantic love is coming from the head or ego, not the heart. Love that is truly from the heart is always unconditional love.
100%, it is caused by the resistance of the present moment and thinking too far into the future or constantly living in the past through the egoic mind
Spiritual companions and Divine unions are real. You won’t know why you love this person so much but you will love them profoundly, and it will be unconditional. May we all be so lucky to experience this type of union in this lifetime. If not there will be other lives...it is all written in the stars. ✨
@@salem2554 that was the answer to a comment made by someone, has been deleted.. but yeah that might not be completely true, though in a greater sense, yes
True love just is. It's not an emotion, it is not thought, it just is. This is the formless Eckart talks about. You don't "loooovvveee" this other person, the love is just there. I'm one of the lucky few (but I'm not, I have transcended some of the ego) that has come across this love. I can't even explain this from the mind or put it into words. When I look at him or spend time with him, all I see and feel is myself. Through him/myself I experience satori. It is fully formless. The layers of form blocks the whole "relationship". It's not a relationship!!! A relationship is in relation to another. This is not in relation to anything, it just is. I do adore him and his sweetness and his soul is therapeutic because he is myself in another form yet me in the formless. So hard to explain. Once you experience satori, you know exactly what I'm trying to get across because you can't even describe or explain satori.
2:30 I actually agree with this entirely. It IS a fall in consciousness. Before I met the girl I fell in love with, my mind was open. I was more free of attachment, open to opportunities, and not tied down by expectations... but after I fell in love it's as if all my peripheral vision was blurred and I only saw her. I lost my drive. I lost that feeling of freedom and openness I once had. She was the only thing that really mattered anymore. It really fucked up my life and it was so powerful i didn't feel as though I had a choice in the matter..I dont think romantic love Is a healthy emotion. I think it's like a drug..it dulls your mind.
My Aunt has dementia, so everyone thinks that she doesn’t know them...I tell them that her heart knows you💝💝💝 I brought her flowers because she loved gardening...and she told me many times how beautiful the are. Don’t give up on people 🦋💜🦋
I watched a video on here last week about free will. There was a part in it were they put electrodes on a person who had been in a vegetative state for years, when they spoke to the vegetative person, specific parts of the brain consistent with the conversation subjects lit up as if they were uninjured, conscience! Obviously consciousness is still there! Lots of love to you and your beautiful Aunt ❤x
I absolutely confirm this, for personal experience with my beloved grandfather (father, in essence) who could deeply feel and show his emotions. He recognized me and the way I felt even the last day.
The story about that young couple in the 50's and how the mind can destroy love just struck me like a lightning bolt. I've been guilty of letting my mind destroy romantic love.
Because true love has to be with self. Self-esteem, self love, self preservation or lack of these cause pain=no love. Then you say to have loved at all? Still searching💛
Yes, unfortunately you are right. The relationships have become power struggle because they are a "relationship between two egos" and the egos create situations where they can dominate. I have always intuitively known that, but nobody has explained the ego and the painbody in the clear and detailed way E. Tolle has. I am so deeply grateful for his teachings.
Relationships can be our greatest spiritual practice! All of our personal drama and stories will be flushed out and it is our mission to recognize the fiction and constantly return to allowing and love!! ❤❤🤙
Always a lesson. I can dig it! May Peace be with You All Dear Mary, May God grant you the serenity to accept that you can not change, also give you the courage to change that you can, and the wisdom to know the difference 🙏🖖
Oh, this is so very very true. Most people are on the level of the temporary "love" attachment. Mind is full of fear and open heart is full True Love that always Love no matter what. To find a partner with an open heart is like finding a twin flame.
Honestly, I think there are more open hearted people out there than we think. As Eckhart had said before and in my own personal experience, there are definitely more and more people "awakening". Keep mindful and positive about what it is that you want/need in your partner and Im sure you shall :)
Beautiful talk. Yes, the relationships hold an attachment and hold craving at the same time. It's an art to maintain a relationship without creating an attachment to the person.
I do also believe that conscious relationships can be a great way to encourage growth. When you allow yourself to become comfortable and open with your partner and an unconcious moment/behavior arises it is a lot easier to notice it when space is being held in a loving setting. Sometimes I view relationships as a ‘good pain’ like when you stretch or work out and your body responds by aching, it almost gives you a chance to become conscious in the moment. I have been blessed with troublesome relationships that enable me to look inside. Thank you dear Eckhart for your wonderful weekly videos.
Love through the soul, not with the mind. I say “through” the soul and not “with” it because at the soul level we are already love. Love is a state of being and it is who you truly are at the core. 🙏🏽🤍☁️🕊
That example Eckhart gives at the end from that book is powerful. The power of the human mind and identification with judgement/negative stories destroys relationships. That was deep.
I love how obvious Elkhart makes things. I love the clarity with which he explains how complicated the human mind can be with all its stories. So refreshing to hear this video again.
Social psychologists have identified that the "Seven Year Itch" is real - most marriages and committed relationships seem to hit a crisis at seven years in. I also read that we are usually attracted to people because they hold some quality we wish we had. Maybe that's the point - 7 years in - at which,on average, we have incorporated the qualities we admired so much in the other person (and therefore idealized them for). Once that energy has been incorporated into our being, we may not need the other person as much. The mental-emotional level of ego and soul therefore must rely upon other attracting factors to want to stay attached. Perhaps that's why compatibility, in the form of friendship, is a very important factor in whether people stay together longer than that.
Falcon Britt there’s a girl who I respect a lot because she has a ruthless go getting nature. Do I want that kind of quality myself? I’m attracted to her but I don’t hope to get with her....
I have read that the seven year itch is biologically based. I have also read that it is due to us really seeing our beloved. Our fantasy of them cast off. We become disappointed and our expectations unmet. We live deluding ourselves and then are upset when things are not going the way we thought they would.
Romance is based in uncertainty... I think I got that from him. Really changed a lifetime of skewed perceptions. With this vid's particular response, I'd add that even for the unawakened the first step to having a relationship is self actualization.
Richard Bach and Leslie Parrish had a multi-lifetime soulmate relationship that is very inspiring. Richard wrote about it in the book The Bridge Across Forever. His book is a very real account of his own hopes and fears, and how he overcame his fears to be able to devote himself to her. It's a wonderful story and helps us feel that finding our soulmate truly is possible.
@@victoriadorgu3207 Not to be disrespectful, and your experience must have been difficult, but what has it got to do with Leslie and Richard's experience? Were you looking for the spotlight so that you could exact some kind of revenge on your ex by publically exposing him here? Bitterness will get you nowhere.
Eckhart, Thank You for this information. It resonates in my soul. And for all my romantic relationships including marriage, my eyes of wisdom, heart, soul, and maturity have changed so much. The other person is not your completion or other half so to speak, and this journey into relationships thru attraction, often meet a different end, because people do not know each other in deeper ways, and the desires & expectations & assumptions . No Judgement implied. Love is the beautiful note thru all the many experiences in our lives. There is wisdom & great Love in this talk from Eckhart. Blessings to all.
Just like looking for the source of problems outside of ourselves looking for love outside of ourselves will eventually turn empty when we lose the connection to our inner being and depend on the conditions of a relationship for our happiness. Once we create this complete love with our inner being we can find lasting love in another.
This was mind blowing to me. I truly believe there is something greater each time I watch theese lessons. I watched the movie based on the mentioned novel today after having a turbulent relationship that was riddled with mixed emotions in the past 2 months now coming to a painful distancing. I watched this movie before discovering this lesson earlier this evening. The night passed and I came to this channel for some guidance on how to find myself again in true love and relationships and Eckhart quoted the EXACT movie/novel I watched earlier this night. I'm in ave and painful realisation of it all now. It is comforting yet distressing on how life brings you lessons. I am thankful and I am aware that life truly gives you all the guidance you need to nurture your true self and become a bigger person in life that is presented to us. But only if we are open to it's calls. THANK YOU, this channel helps me so much.
Love between 2 people can become an unconscious knowing and loving of the other that transcends words. Even when one of the couple have left this form and have moved into a spiritual form ...
This explained for me the difference between the man in my life now vs previous. The stillness, the peace, the calm deep inside my soul, without expectations, being surrendered to what is and what will be... I am love and this reflection resonating is true love. It is what it is That is the difference. THANK YOU Eckhart for shining that light.
Love in its purest form is an emotion... I think we need to get our ideas of what love is and just feel. Just feel. Don’t think or overthink and this question answers itself within each person...
Very true. Sometimes I feel so happy that I could share it with the whole world. The relationship part is often just about the sexual. True love comes from within. Sometimes I feel like I can really see what is under peoples skin. It is beautiful. It is like looking at yourself in a mirror.
Me and my ex girlfriend had a huge pain body release. Lots of "shadow projection came out" lots of things were said when we were both hurt that emotionally destroyed us .... Afterwards I got diagnosed with borderline personality (which explains all of my extreme emotions). It had to happen though. I see that it was a necessity for us to learn and grow. Hopefully it can heal and turn into something greater. We've broken up twice but the love was so great because we were so similar in good and bad ways. Each time it got better and better but it's very painful to go through it and we both still love each other but leaving it up to God..
This time I desagree with you Mr. Tolle. When you are in love and with your lover is one of the few times you are really conscious in the present moment. It is when times goes by and you start to loose this atention that you star to see defects and inconvinients.
We all look for a reflection of ourselves in others. But sometimes love for an individual is also a search of the universe to find itself again through the Past, Present and the Future.
In awakened state, the energy changes and is peaceful and free to express itself without attachment to the outcome. A simple noticing of "another" energy when they are in the same space with you, physical appearance, emotional landscape as well as the state of spiritual consciousness expressed through psychological mind. The mind appears to be complex , yet it is not. One who knows of true essence is free Such relationships are based on authenticity, free to express oneself and allowing to simply be present. The sexual energy is simply there as everything is there. Enjoying physical body through touch and sexual expression is simply natural.
The bravest thing to me is that he burped a few times, continued with his explanation and that with almost 1 million viewers put this online ❤️. What an example! Had to watch it again though to stick with the wonderful story ... burping distracts me 🤷🏻♀️ ... this might sound superficial which I am not and ET to me is still the Spielberg creation and this man called Eckhart Tolle to me is a miracle.
منذ ان بدأ استمع الى مداخلاتك ومحاضرات،، حضرت في الأن، استفيد كثيرا في دوراتي التدريبية التي أقدمها للناس، و اتمنى من اعماق روحي ان اكون حاضرة في احدى محاضراتك...شكرا لك
@@dianamary6170 - No need to translate. That living's in your head, the opposite of this philosophy. Why not just enjoy the shape of the letters without questions, opinions, or judgments?
@@dianamary6170 - You take things to personally. Now you think I am judging. We all judge. There is no way to get around it if you have a mind. RELAX!!! Don't seek so much confrontation.
She globally says that ET's teachings benefited her greatly when it comes to training sessions she offers people, that she wishes from the bottom of her heart to attend one of his retreats, and she thanks him.
He’s right about the mind destroying the relationship with the story. If your relationship is in peril, go back to basics and just enjoy the other persons presence. Imagine there is nowhere to get to, and nowhere to get away from, and just witness the other person.
I used to follow conservative Islam for long, then stopped following it because it's full of 'Dos and Don'ts,' then I searched for Sufi Islam, and found what peace and bliss really is... I read Rumi at times, even reading him is so blissful.
What a great question,! I believe yes we still do experience the uniqueness of the romantic intimate sensual and more in a relationship. Just as a unique different way for the “Love” as a state of being to manifest and experienced this great way. based on no needs wants or anything but unconditional love and undeniable attraction ; when we are conscious about our selves as unconditional love and could accept that as our personal truth and experience of our selves with or without a partner, then we may fall in love with another one that knows them selves the same way so the two merge as one in balance and stay in their uniqueness as two souls and personalities, accepted and loved as they are, and a romantic relationship of the highest form is possible, not one that says “I can’t live without you” but one that is an expression of the merging of the feminine and the masculine, and birthing the great energy of the twin flame relationship, a relationship that comes from the heart and not the mind so it can not be contained in our limited perspectives and believes about how a relationship showed be, has its own soul timing .
Queen ...Who wants to live for ever “””There's no time for us There's no place for us What is this thing that builds our dreams Yet slips away from us? Who wants to live forever? Who wants to live forever? There's no chance for us It's all decided for us This world has only one Sweet moment set aside for us Who wants to live forever? Who wants to live forever? Who? Who dares to love forever Oh, when love must die? But touch my tears with your lips Touch my world with your fingertips And we can have forever
I love this answer, and I love the book 'On Chisel Beach' which sits on my bookshelf. I wonder how many times I have projected my own narrative on to a situation, especially with guys. And if someone were witnessing they would be willing me to see what is really there and not what my mind is bringing up, which is no more then my own narrow view of the world based on my experiences to date.
Love is significant, a good learning situation, but only a learning situation. It is better to be with one, so that you can be more totally one with her, so that you can understand her and your own longings more clearly; so you are less clouded, less in anguish, because love in the beginning is only an unconscious phenomenon: it is biological, it is nothing very precious. Only when you bring your awareness to it, when you become more and more meditative about it, does it start becoming precious, start soaring high. Intimacy with one woman or one man is better than having many superficial relationships. Love is not a seasonal flower, it takes years to grow. And only when it grows does it go beyond biology, and start having something of the spiritual in it. Just being with many women or many men will keep you superficial - entertained maybe, but superficial; occupied certainly, but that occupation is not going to help in inward growth. But a one-to-one relationship, a sustained relationship so that you can understand each other more closely, is tremendously beneficial. Why is it so? And what is the need to understand the woman or the man? The need is because every man has a feminine part in his being, and every woman has a masculine part in her being. The only way to understand it, the easiest way to understand it, the most natural way to understand it is to be in deep, intimate relationship with someone. If you are a man be in a deep, intimate relationship with a woman. Let trust grow so all barriers dissolve. Come so close to each other that you can look deep into the woman and the woman can look deep into you. Don't be dishonest with each other. And if you are having so many relationships you will be dishonest, you will be lying continually. You will have to lie, you will have to be insincere, you will have to say things which you don't mean and they will all suspect. It is very difficult to create trust with a woman if you are having some other relationship. It is easy to deceive a man because he lives through the intellect; it is very difficult, almost impossible to deceive a woman because she lives intuitively. You will not be able to look directly into her eyes; you will be afraid that she may start reading your soul, and you are hiding so many deceptive things, so many dishonesties. So if you are having many relationships you will not be able to dive deep into the psyche of the woman. And that is the only thing that is needed: to know your own inner feminine part. Relationship becomes a mirror. The woman starts looking into you and starts finding her own masculine part; the man looks into the woman and starts discovering his own femininity. And the more you become aware of your feminine - the other pole - the more whole you can be, the more integrated you can be. When your inner man and woman have disappeared into each other, have become dissolved into each other, when they are no longer separate, when they have become one integrated whole, you have become an individual. But playing with many people will keep you superficial, entertained, occupied, but not growing; and the only thing that matters ultimately is growth, growth of integration, individuality, growth of a center in you. And that growth needs you to know your other part. The easiest approach is to know the woman on the outside first, so that you can know the woman inside. Just like a mirror... The mirror reflects your face, it shows you your face - the woman becomes your mirror, the man becomes your mirror. The other reflects your face, but if you have so many mirrors around you and you are running from one mirror to another and deceiving each mirror about the other you will be in a chaos, you will go nuts.
Yes, you are absolutely resonating with my belief when speaking of a lifelong partner. Together we are able to attain new levels of consciousness. We were designed to know this type of relationship and prosper from it.
sri Aurobindo says there can a Deep splendour between two persons, but this radiance, this sheen is borrowed from above, beyond or it Comes from beyond. and according to the mother it is an ideal to grow together, but Always to move on
That man's consiousness must have been off the charts... I have several of his books... One could read the first line of his magnum opus "The Life Divine" and meditate upon that for months :-)
There is too much conditioning in our day and time towards romantic love. I wish I knew earlier that love is a state of being and that I am complete on my own, if I only could feel this completeness and oneness within. I understand why so many deeply spiritual people are celibate and are not needing a sexual relationship with another. There is an energy dimension to this too, that is why transcendence of romantic love is so hard. Only when you do not need something you can choose to experience it without the poison of attachment. Such a deep topic, actually.
This describes what has happened to me very well. It's not the end of my life though, i dont understand why it is so difficult to recognise my self. It seems so simple for others
Thank you Mr. Tolle and the young man who posed the question. That is the best comparison / analysis of romantic love i've heard in 72 years on Earth. Even psychologists and ministers i've listened to don't have the insight you seem to have. I guess it's because they're loyal to a particular set of doctrines. And reality often transcends man - made teachings.
Love has the power to heal the mind, body and the soul, love is not a relationship, love is a state of being
Gurudra - Emotional Health & Peace 💜👍👍That Right Love happens in the Hearts off everyone!😄😄😄😃😃
agreed
And it is not just an emotion either. The emotion of being in love could also be described as oneness.
Word💖💯
@@Seegalgalguntijak - No, that is not true. If the person you 'love' is not available, that is not 'oneness' but longing and pain.
As it is said, relationships are not there to make you happy but to make you grow.
A partner that leads you back to yourself. Divine reflection.
Yes.
not as easy as it sounds---try owning the mirror
"You never fall in love; you rise in love. The moment one is attached, one starts falling low in consciousness." - Osho.
Thank you
Did you see the wild wild west documentary? I highly recommend it
@@billstyles8660 Yes, I did see. Unlike other masters, Osho's speech itself is a device for meditation, a first in the history of spirituality.
Wonderful quote.
This is perfect. Thank you.
Where is this from btw?
Love is the craving for feeling desired, feeling wanted, feeling complete. As long as your partner is filling this bottomless hole, there is joy. As soon as he or she is unable to make you feel special, there is unconsciousness. If you really want to make your love last for a lifetime, get in touch with your true essence. Love yourself without the craving of someone other making you feel joyful and complete. When two people who are enough for themselves start sharing their joy, then love without unconsciousness arises..
WORD! Beautifully stated truth!
Here's something else - virtually EVERYTHING being done in the egoic state is an attempt to become more complete - the ego spends its whole existence trying to recreate what it feels it has lost, filling up a needy hole within itself. But this is ultimately futile.
However what is done after enlightenment and awakening of being is the unfolding of the divine - the outpouring of abundance.
Perfect, " ...enough for themselves". Awesome!
Wow, I love this. Thank you so much!!!
Seems about right, thanks 💚
As Eckhart points out here, sometimes romantic love is coming from the head or ego, not the heart. Love that is truly from the heart is always unconditional love.
I think the Greeks got it right about the different kinds of love
@@WAX1138 I think your right.. I’m going to have to refresh my memory on each one. Thanks for inspiring me!
Stress is caused by being “here” but wanting to be “there”.
True but what's there if not here?
@@marshownanderson8561 Nothing. Therefore, stress is caused by making something out of nothing.
Stress is not real and anything not real is an illusion brought on from fear. Thanks E.T.
Who told us we were stressed?
Eckhart quote :)
100%, it is caused by the resistance of the present moment and thinking too far into the future or constantly living in the past through the egoic mind
Spiritual companions and Divine unions are real. You won’t know why you love this person so much but you will love them profoundly, and it will be unconditional. May we all be so lucky to experience this type of union in this lifetime. If not there will be other lives...it is all written in the stars. ✨
Indeed and there’s no guarantee you’ll remain together, but the union is the most beautiful, unconditioned experience ever had.
⭐⭐👁👁💖💖
"When you change the way you look at things, things you look at change. 🙂
I mean this in the most nicest friendly way; The guy who asked the question sounds like such a sweetheart 🌈🍯
How could that comment be taken in any other way?
@@Achilles94627 some people might think we’re obsessing over a person.. or just stuck on identity
@@MegaSaanch some people think too much. i found our boy sweet!
@@salem2554 that was the answer to a comment made by someone, has been deleted.. but yeah that might not be completely true, though in a greater sense, yes
@@MegaSaanch i agree! there are other people who think too little, too! we have all kinds of people here on Earth. :))
Eckhart is a treasure. Any time I need to put myself back on track, his words shove me right back where I need to be. What a wonderful man.
I feel you !! xD Same here. He ist a Life Changer
I agree. Listening to him is literally like having a light appear in my consciousness.
Exactly, If I'm having rough days and feel I can't be present, I listen to him and it always helps
@@elianahernandez631 Actually been listening to him again recently after a while of being away. The truth is timeless, gotta love him
@@Jac0bIAm .
The two of us have shared 42 years of love that becomes more unconditional in every moment. This is our destiny and our home.
What’s your secret
True love just is.
It's not an emotion, it is not thought, it just is. This is the formless Eckart talks about.
You don't "loooovvveee" this other person, the love is just there.
I'm one of the lucky few (but I'm not, I have transcended some of the ego) that has come across this love. I can't even explain this from the mind or put it into words.
When I look at him or spend time with him, all I see and feel is myself. Through him/myself I experience satori.
It is fully formless. The layers of form blocks the whole "relationship". It's not a relationship!!! A relationship is in relation to another. This is not in relation to anything, it just is.
I do adore him and his sweetness and his soul is therapeutic because he is myself in another form yet me in the formless.
So hard to explain.
Once you experience satori, you know exactly what I'm trying to get across because you can't even describe or explain satori.
This is also true for any type of relationship (friend, sibling, parents, etc.). No one can fill you up. Only you can fill you up.
I never thought about this. Makes me think... thank you for writing this.
2:30 I actually agree with this entirely. It IS a fall in consciousness. Before I met the girl I fell in love with, my mind was open. I was more free of attachment, open to opportunities, and not tied down by expectations... but after I fell in love it's as if all my peripheral vision was blurred and I only saw her. I lost my drive. I lost that feeling of freedom and openness I once had. She was the only thing that really mattered anymore. It really fucked up my life and it was so powerful i didn't feel as though I had a choice in the matter..I dont think romantic love Is a healthy emotion. I think it's like a drug..it dulls your mind.
My Aunt has dementia, so everyone thinks that she doesn’t know them...I tell them that her heart knows you💝💝💝 I brought her flowers because she loved gardening...and she told me many times how beautiful the are. Don’t give up on people 🦋💜🦋
I watched a video on here last week about free will. There was a part in it were they put electrodes on a person who had been in a vegetative state for years, when they spoke to the vegetative person, specific parts of the brain consistent with the conversation subjects lit up as if they were uninjured, conscience! Obviously consciousness is still there! Lots of love to you and your beautiful Aunt ❤x
Yes! Even when the brain is not functioning properly, the fully conscious spirit of the person is still there!
The brain is only an antenna, it's not the signal!
I absolutely confirm this, for personal experience with my beloved grandfather (father, in essence) who could deeply feel and show his emotions. He recognized me and the way I felt even the last day.
The mind creates a barrier between you and the other. 💕✨
Yes. Sometimes words get in the way.
The story about that young couple in the 50's and how the mind can destroy love just struck me like a lightning bolt. I've been guilty of letting my mind destroy romantic love.
Same here.
Contemporary relationships have become more or less power struggles.
A true love is love for life itself.
Because true love has to be with self. Self-esteem, self love, self preservation or lack of these cause pain=no love. Then you say to have loved at all? Still searching💛
yes
I see you on EVERY single UA-cam channel I follow. You are insane man
Yes, unfortunately you are right. The relationships have become power struggle because they are a "relationship between two egos" and the egos create situations where they can dominate. I have always intuitively known that, but nobody has explained the ego and the painbody in the clear and detailed way E. Tolle has. I am so deeply grateful for his teachings.
Yes, relationships hold always a sense of attachment.
So many young people on the path to awakening 🙏❤️
the gentleman asking the question has such a beautiful smile and energy emanating from him :)
I heard he's single ;)
@@ihsankamil6279 Are you him? Haha
lol I was thinking the same thing 😃
Relationships can be our greatest spiritual practice! All of our personal drama and stories will be flushed out and it is our mission to recognize the fiction and constantly return to allowing and love!! ❤❤🤙
Always a lesson.
I can dig it!
May Peace be with You All
Dear Mary, May God grant you the serenity to accept that you can not change, also give you the courage to change that you can, and the wisdom to know the difference 🙏🖖
So many people live in fantasy. They create their own suffering when expectations are not achieved.
So true.
💯
Oh, this is so very very true. Most people are on the level of the temporary "love" attachment. Mind is full of fear and open heart is full True Love that always Love no matter what. To find a partner with an open heart is like finding a twin flame.
Honestly, I think there are more open hearted people out there than we think. As Eckhart had said before and in my own personal experience, there are definitely more and more people "awakening". Keep mindful and positive about what it is that you want/need in your partner and Im sure you shall :)
Beautiful talk. Yes, the relationships hold an attachment and hold craving at the same time. It's an art to maintain a relationship without creating an attachment to the person.
Such a young man such a deep question 💜
Such a young lady, such a deep appreciation🍓
@@albal2091 what a fantastic response 😁❤️
The consequence is only suffering
I'm not sure he can get it really, not before he experiences his own ones.
He might then remember this beautiful answer.
Why do you think that?
I do also believe that conscious relationships can be a great way to encourage growth. When you allow yourself to become comfortable and open with your partner and an unconcious moment/behavior arises it is a lot easier to notice it when space is being held in a loving setting. Sometimes I view relationships as a ‘good pain’ like when you stretch or work out and your body responds by aching, it almost gives you a chance to become conscious in the moment. I have been blessed with troublesome relationships that enable me to look inside.
Thank you dear Eckhart for your wonderful weekly videos.
Sarah M N true
Beautifully said!!!!
Felt the same way too. Having relationships with a person or with people is like looking yourself in the mirror - it's a reflection of who you are.
Well said🌻
Love through the soul, not with the mind. I say “through” the soul and not “with” it because at the soul level we are already love. Love is a state of being and it is who you truly are at the core. 🙏🏽🤍☁️🕊
All of it is cool , but it's just talk . We have to experience it not talk about it .
Romantic love dissolves through true spiritual Love
Reading comments I feel very happy that so many people are in the middle of conscious searching for answers. It’s empowering. May the God bless you.
That example Eckhart gives at the end from that book is powerful. The power of the human mind and identification with judgement/negative stories destroys relationships. That was deep.
StarlightOracle 💜🌹👍👍They never last!🙈🙈🤷♀️🤷♀️🤷♀️🤷♀️😢😢
So why are you here watching? Makes no
sense Cray Cray. You must be such a happy person going around calling people idiots for fun.
If you need a feeling from another individual then you can be sure to take a fall when that others' behaviour fluctuates and thus alters the feeling.
So true! Physical is not enough to last....the awakened consciousness is needed to last.
I love how obvious Elkhart makes things. I love the clarity with which he explains how complicated the human mind can be with all its stories. So refreshing to hear this video again.
Social psychologists have identified that the "Seven Year Itch" is real - most marriages and committed relationships seem to hit a crisis at seven years in. I also read that we are usually attracted to people because they hold some quality we wish we had. Maybe that's the point - 7 years in - at which,on average, we have incorporated the qualities we admired so much in the other person (and therefore idealized them for). Once that energy has been incorporated into our being, we may not need the other person as much. The mental-emotional level of ego and soul therefore must rely upon other attracting factors to want to stay attached. Perhaps that's why compatibility, in the form of friendship, is a very important factor in whether people stay together longer than that.
Falcon Britt there’s a girl who I respect a lot because she has a ruthless go getting nature. Do I want that kind of quality myself? I’m attracted to her but I don’t hope to get with her....
Your soul is mine! ~ Shang Tsung
There is something to this it's got a lot of truth.
That's why we don't resonate romantically with them anymore, the pull is gone.
I have read that the seven year itch is biologically based. I have also read that it is due to us really seeing our beloved. Our fantasy of them cast off. We become disappointed and our expectations unmet. We live deluding ourselves and then are upset when things are not going the way we thought they would.
Romance is based in uncertainty... I think I got that from him. Really changed a lifetime of skewed perceptions. With this vid's particular response, I'd add that even for the unawakened the first step to having a relationship is self actualization.
Richard Bach and Leslie Parrish had a multi-lifetime soulmate relationship that is very inspiring. Richard wrote about it in the book The Bridge Across Forever. His book is a very real account of his own hopes and fears, and how he overcame his fears to be able to devote himself to her. It's a wonderful story and helps us feel that finding our soulmate truly is possible.
@@victoriadorgu3207 Not to be disrespectful, and your experience must have been difficult, but what has it got to do with Leslie and Richard's experience? Were you looking for the spotlight so that you could exact some kind of revenge on your ex by publically exposing him here? Bitterness will get you nowhere.
Richard and Leslie parted ways several years ago. They are no longer together.
They divorced in 1999.
The young guy asking his question, is as inspiring as Eckhart is, so beautiful and present!
Yeah. Thank God, we are live on earth with Eckhart at the same time. What a treasure...
Eckhart,
Thank You for this information. It resonates in my soul. And for all my romantic relationships including marriage, my eyes of wisdom, heart, soul, and maturity have changed so much. The other person is not your completion or other half so to speak, and this journey into relationships thru attraction, often meet a different end, because people do not know each other in deeper ways, and the desires & expectations & assumptions . No Judgement implied. Love is the beautiful note thru all the many experiences in our lives. There is wisdom & great Love in this talk from Eckhart. Blessings to all.
Just like looking for the source of problems outside of ourselves looking for love outside of ourselves will eventually turn empty when we lose the connection to our inner being and depend on the conditions of a relationship for our happiness. Once we create this complete love with our inner being we can find lasting love in another.
True
Briana Borten nice! This was the interpretation I resonated with 🙌🏿
So Very TRUE.
This was mind blowing to me. I truly believe there is something greater each time I watch theese lessons. I watched the movie based on the mentioned novel today after having a turbulent relationship that was riddled with mixed emotions in the past 2 months now coming to a painful distancing. I watched this movie before discovering this lesson earlier this evening. The night passed and I came to this channel for some guidance on how to find myself again in true love and relationships and Eckhart quoted the EXACT movie/novel I watched earlier this night. I'm in ave and painful realisation of it all now. It is comforting yet distressing on how life brings you lessons. I am thankful and I am aware that life truly gives you all the guidance you need to nurture your true self and become a bigger person in life that is presented to us. But only if we are open to it's calls. THANK YOU, this channel helps me so much.
The MIND can be a "FICTICIOUS" JUDGEMENT in HOW we LIVE OUR LIVES. THANK YOU, Eckhart Tolle
Love between 2 people can become an unconscious knowing and loving of the other that transcends words. Even when one of the couple have left this form and have moved into a spiritual form ...
ET looking healthy and vibrant, just like his message which is true love.
Just realize Eckhart Tolle is ET for the first letters of his name!... 😮 I thought you were playing like he is like E .T, the film, lol.
This explained for me the difference between the man in my life now vs previous. The stillness, the peace, the calm deep inside my soul, without expectations, being surrendered to what is and what will be... I am love and this reflection resonating is true love. It is what it is That is the difference. THANK YOU Eckhart for shining that light.
the guy asking the question looks so kind and full of light
Just in time for Valentine's day.
We do not fall IN love rather we are WITH love this is infinite endless unattached beingness 🤍🙏🏼🕊
Thank you
Eckhart with every answer changes lives.
I love someone on this level. I feel like we're travelling through life together on a magic adventure. X
I've had this question on my mind for a while now - THANK YOU for asking the question and for the enlightening answer!
Love in its purest form is an emotion... I think we need to get our ideas of what love is and just feel. Just feel. Don’t think or overthink and this question answers itself within each person...
Very true. Sometimes I feel so happy that I could share it with the whole world. The relationship part is often just about the sexual. True love comes from within. Sometimes I feel like I can really see what is under peoples skin. It is beautiful. It is like looking at yourself in a mirror.
I learned very young..something simple..do not fight reality ..
Thank you, Eckhart. I am this twin flame journey and I will listen to this every day as a reminder.
That Guys is formulating his question so perfectly!
Me and my ex girlfriend had a huge pain body release. Lots of "shadow projection came out" lots of things were said when we were both hurt that emotionally destroyed us .... Afterwards I got diagnosed with borderline personality (which explains all of my extreme emotions). It had to happen though. I see that it was a necessity for us to learn and grow. Hopefully it can heal and turn into something greater. We've broken up twice but the love was so great because we were so similar in good and bad ways. Each time it got better and better but it's very painful to go through it and we both still love each other but leaving it up to God..
Happiness never lays its finger on its pulse
Ahhhh, the Special Love Relationship...you meet my needs, and I'll love you conditionally.
Very beautiful, one amongst the most adhorable answer by Ekhart, to equally beautiful question.
This time I desagree with you Mr. Tolle. When you are in love and with your lover is one of the few times you are really conscious in the present moment. It is when times goes by and you start to loose this atention that you star to see defects and inconvinients.
We all look for a reflection of ourselves in others. But sometimes love for an individual is also a search of the universe to find itself again through the Past, Present and the Future.
In awakened state, the energy changes and is peaceful and free to express itself without attachment to the outcome. A simple noticing of "another" energy when they are in the same space with you, physical appearance, emotional landscape as well as the state of spiritual consciousness expressed through psychological mind. The mind appears to be complex , yet it is not. One who knows of true essence is free Such relationships are based on authenticity, free to express oneself and allowing to simply be present. The sexual energy is simply there as everything is there. Enjoying physical body through touch and sexual expression is simply natural.
The bravest thing to me is that he burped a few times, continued with his explanation and that with almost 1 million viewers put this online ❤️. What an example! Had to watch it again though to stick with the wonderful story ... burping distracts me 🤷🏻♀️ ... this might sound superficial which I am not and ET to me is still the Spielberg creation and this man called Eckhart Tolle to me is a miracle.
منذ ان بدأ استمع الى مداخلاتك ومحاضرات،، حضرت في الأن، استفيد كثيرا في دوراتي التدريبية التي أقدمها للناس، و اتمنى من اعماق روحي ان اكون حاضرة في احدى محاضراتك...شكرا لك
@@dianamary6170 - No need to translate. That living's in your head, the opposite of this philosophy. Why not just enjoy the shape of the letters without questions, opinions, or judgments?
@@dianamary6170 - You take things to personally. Now you think I am judging. We all judge. There is no way to get around it if you have a mind. RELAX!!! Don't seek so much confrontation.
Can someone translate this? thanks.
She globally says that ET's teachings benefited her greatly when it comes to training sessions she offers people, that she wishes from the bottom of her heart to attend one of his retreats, and she thanks him.
@@abderrahmenbenrhouma2314 Shukran
I love his question!!!!
Eckhart is so sweet, also the man, lovely ! :)
Was listening to music on autoplay and this came on. I really needed to hear this today.
He’s right about the mind destroying the relationship with the story. If your relationship is in peril, go back to basics and just enjoy the other persons presence. Imagine there is nowhere to get to, and nowhere to get away from, and just witness the other person.
The *"ULTIMATE!"* Lesson is *"SPIRITUAL!!!"* OUR UNIVERSAL CREATOR, MOST HIGH, HEAVENLY FATHER GOD is *LOVE!!!* *ONE LOVE* *LOVE * LIGHT * TRUTH*
I used to follow conservative Islam for long, then stopped following it because it's full of 'Dos and Don'ts,' then I searched for Sufi Islam, and found what peace and bliss really is... I read Rumi at times, even reading him is so blissful.
I listened to Sufi teacher for 6 months before I realised he's not Buddhist.
@@gregdys02 What does that mean? Does that mean that Sufi teachings are similar to Buddhist teachings in the beginning?
What a great question,! I believe yes we still do experience the uniqueness of the romantic intimate sensual and more in a relationship. Just as a unique different way for the “Love” as a state of being to manifest and experienced this great way. based on no needs wants or anything but unconditional love and undeniable attraction ; when we are conscious about our selves as unconditional love and could accept that as our personal truth and experience of our selves with or without a partner, then we may fall in love with another one that knows them selves the same way so the two merge as one in balance and stay in their uniqueness as two souls and personalities, accepted and loved as they are, and a romantic relationship of the highest form is possible, not one that says “I can’t live without you” but one that is an expression of the merging of the feminine and the masculine, and birthing the great energy of the twin flame relationship, a relationship that comes from the heart and not the mind so it can not be contained in our limited perspectives and believes about how a relationship showed be, has its own soul timing .
Queen ...Who wants to live for ever “””There's no time for us
There's no place for us
What is this thing that builds our dreams
Yet slips away from us?
Who wants to live forever?
Who wants to live forever?
There's no chance for us
It's all decided for us
This world has only one
Sweet moment set aside for us
Who wants to live forever?
Who wants to live forever?
Who?
Who dares to love forever
Oh, when love must die?
But touch my tears with your lips
Touch my world with your fingertips
And we can have forever
I love this answer, and I love the book 'On Chisel Beach' which sits on my bookshelf. I wonder how many times I have projected my own narrative on to a situation, especially with guys. And if someone were witnessing they would be willing me to see what is really there and not what my mind is bringing up, which is no more then my own narrow view of the world based on my experiences to date.
The guy is adorable🥰
I’m just so grateful to Eckhart, what else can I say.
Thank you! You are a Holy Man of modern times and I am so grateful for you.
So much love for you, Eckhart ❤️
Love is significant, a good learning situation, but only a learning situation. It is better to be with one, so that you can be more totally one with her, so that you can understand her and your own longings more clearly; so you are less clouded, less in anguish, because love in the beginning is only an unconscious phenomenon: it is biological, it is nothing very precious. Only when you bring your awareness to it, when you become more and more meditative about it, does it start becoming
precious, start soaring high.
Intimacy with one woman or one man is better than having many superficial relationships. Love is not a seasonal flower, it takes years to grow. And only when it grows does it go beyond biology, and start having something of the spiritual in it. Just being with many women or many men will keep you superficial - entertained maybe, but superficial; occupied certainly, but that occupation is not going to help in inward growth. But a one-to-one relationship, a sustained relationship so that you can understand each other more closely, is tremendously beneficial. Why is it so? And what is the need to understand the woman or the man? The need is because every man has a feminine part in his being, and every woman has a masculine part in her being. The only way to understand it, the easiest way to understand it, the most natural way to understand it is to be in deep, intimate
relationship with someone. If you are a man be in a deep, intimate relationship with a woman. Let trust grow so all barriers dissolve. Come so close to each other that you can look deep into the woman and the woman can look deep into you. Don't be dishonest with each other.
And if you are having so many relationships you will be dishonest, you will be lying continually. You will have to lie, you will have to be insincere, you will have to say things which you don't mean and they will all suspect. It is very difficult to create trust with a woman if you are having some other relationship. It is easy to deceive a man because he lives through the intellect; it is very difficult, almost impossible to deceive a woman because she lives intuitively. You will not be able to look directly into her eyes; you will be afraid that she may start reading your soul, and you are hiding so many deceptive things, so many dishonesties.
So if you are having many relationships you will not be able to dive deep into the psyche of the woman. And that is the only thing that is needed: to know your own inner feminine part.
Relationship becomes a mirror. The woman starts looking into you and starts finding her own masculine part; the man looks into the woman and starts discovering his own femininity. And the more you become aware of your feminine - the other pole - the more whole you can be, the more integrated you can be. When your inner man and woman have disappeared into each other, have
become dissolved into each other, when they are no longer separate, when they have become one integrated whole, you have become an individual.
But playing with many people will keep you superficial, entertained, occupied, but not growing; and the only thing that matters ultimately is growth, growth of integration, individuality, growth of a center in you. And that growth needs you to know your other part. The easiest approach is to know the woman on the outside first, so that you can
know the woman inside.
Just like a mirror... The mirror reflects your face, it shows you your face - the woman becomes your mirror, the man becomes your mirror. The other reflects your face, but if you have so many mirrors around you and you are running from one mirror to another and deceiving each mirror about the other you will be in a chaos, you will go nuts.
TInder
Thank You
Yes, you are absolutely resonating with my belief when speaking of a lifelong partner. Together we are able to attain new levels of consciousness. We were designed to know this type of relationship and prosper from it.
Wow! Great explanation!❤
You just explained what is in my heart.
"The ultimate lesson is spiritual" - Eckhart Tolle
"Falling in love" is one of the means to the unfolding of karmic relationships, IMO.
He is answering deep questions of the man.🙌🍀
sri Aurobindo says there can a Deep splendour between two persons, but this radiance, this sheen is borrowed from above, beyond or it Comes from beyond. and according to the mother it is an ideal to grow together, but Always to move on
That man's consiousness must have been off the charts... I have several of his books... One could read the first line of his magnum opus "The Life Divine" and meditate upon that for months :-)
What an incredible answer, pure wisdom!
There is too much conditioning in our day and time towards romantic love. I wish I knew earlier that love is a state of being and that I am complete on my own, if I only could feel this completeness and oneness within. I understand why so many deeply spiritual people are celibate and are not needing a sexual relationship with another. There is an energy dimension to this too, that is why transcendence of romantic love is so hard. Only when you do not need something you can choose to experience it without the poison of attachment. Such a deep topic, actually.
This describes what has happened to me very well. It's not the end of my life though, i dont understand why it is so difficult to recognise my self. It seems so simple for others
There is so much faith in these fictions. - Don Miguel
Thank you Eckhart Tolle! I love you Now! 💚💜💙🙏
I’m there and thank whatever for that
I don’t seem to struggle being present when ET is speaking 😏
Love is not something you do. It is what you are. Sadhguru
This is one of the most enlightening videos of his that i've seen.
I found this beautiful and profoundly helping.
Couldn't understand his question... But kudos to Eckhart, he is a smart man and he nailed it 😅
Lovely, lovely talk ❤ when Eckhart mentioned Don Miguel Ruiz I got so excited because I love his and Eckhart's works ☯️☮
I don’t need. Love does not want. ❤️❤️❤️
I am so grateful for this knowledge. Love is powerful for healing mind, body and soul.
I can't get over how Eckart looks just like Beans from even Stevens lol I love you! Thank you for sharing this wisdom
Lol 🤣
Thank you Mr. Tolle and the young man who posed the question. That is the best comparison / analysis of romantic love i've heard in 72 years on Earth. Even psychologists and ministers i've listened to don't have the insight you seem to have. I guess it's because they're loyal to a particular set of doctrines. And reality often transcends man - made teachings.