NOOB'S GUIDE to BALTHASAR GELT
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- Опубліковано 28 жов 2020
- A Noob's Guide to BALTHASAR GELT, Supreme Patriarch of the Colleges of Magic, Wielder of the Winds of Magic, Master of the Lore of Meta and the only wizard who puts his faith in the Empire, gold and gunpowder.
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The original Handsome Squidward Gelt was created by Krimli
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MODS USED IN THIS VIDEO
GCCM Maps
Gelt Quicksilver Mount (For the shiny metal Pegasus)
Mixu's Legendary Lords 1 and 2
Battle Standard Bearer
Unique Steam Tanks III
ReShade with Matthew's ReShade Preset
Total Unit Resize II
Ultimate Lighting + Random Weather
Attila's Karl Franz Black Armor
Empire Subfaction Colours Redone
Improved Arrow Trails
Less Blood, Less Gore! - II
Less Buff and Effect VFX - Ігри
If my memory serves me, the duel between Gelt and the Bright College patriarch was described in the White Dwarf magazine when Balthy was first introduced. The duel went more or less like this: The bright wizard thought that Gelt's challenge was laughable, and was sure of victory, since he only had to stay away from Gelt, whose touch would turn him to gold. The moment the fight started, he unleashed a blast of fire at Gelt, who conjured up a metal shield to protect himself. The bright wizard wanted to finish the fight quickly and turned the beam fo fire into a continuous ray of deadly heat. Gelt's shield began dissolving, and the bright wizard focused all his power into the beam. Just before Gelt's shield failed, the fire mage realized that his legs were beginning to turn into gold. His focus lost, he stopped the spell, and Gelt walked up to the staff and took it, with his opponent half-gold. Gelt explained that he used the heat ray as a conduit to 'touch' his opponent, and that magic of metal is an amalgam of several winds of magic, fire wind included. The fire patriarch then pledged his fealty, with just his head not yet solid gold, and Gelty released him so ghat they can both fight the enemies of the empire.
That is what i remember. I may be messing up the details, it's been ages since I read that.
Love the videos, mr Bonds.
I'm honestly glad I didn't find this story beforehand. It deserves its own cinematic short!
Yep, that's the one in 6th edition I referenced just below. See Warhammer Armies: The Empire (2000), p. 54.
Gelt: "Thyrus Gormann, you forgot that the essence of Metal is in equal parts Stone and Fire. This has caused your defeat. I could take your life now, but the Empire needs your powers against its many enemies, your Order requires your leadership, and I would rather have you as a friend. Do you recognise my authority?"
Gormann: "Aye, you won the duel in a fair fight. You are our Supreme Patriarch now and you will have my respect and my loyalty... until we meet again here, in eight years."
Gelt: "I'll be ready, Gormann. I'll be ready."
@@uanchovy9480 6th Ed was peak Fantasy. So much good shit in that era, from the lore in the army books to the random shit they'd put into WD, from the Ogre Kingdoms hype campaign (detailing an imperial scholar's studying of said Big Bois) to the Bugman's Lament campaign (to celebrate the magazine's anniversary) to the variant army lists (which gave us the Vampire Coast, the Barrow Legion, and Clan Moulder armies. They were naff, but they were fine for fluffy armies.)
@@codybonds OOOOOOH, PLEASE, THAT WOULD BE SO SWEET
My guess would have been that he'd super-heat the Volans staff to be so hot no one else could touch it, or turn it to lead so that it'd be so heavy no one else could wield it.
WELCOME TO ESTALLIA GENTLEMAN
*Paranoid starts playing*
@@MortalCosta WHEN THE FUNNY SKELETONS RAISE UP FROM THE GROUND AND YOU TURN THEM INTO BONE SCAPS WITH THE FUNNY THREE BARREL GUN
I WILL NOT LIE: THE CHANCES OF YOUR SURVIVAL ARE SMALL
@@intergalactichumanempire9759 SOME MAY EVEN TURN AGAINST YOUR FRIENDS AS LIVING CORPSES
BUT YOU HAVE MY WORD THAT I WILL USR MY ARCANE GIFTS TO ENSURE YOUR BODIES ARE GIVEN UNTO MORR'S GARDEN.
Ah, Balthazar gelt, the man who singlehandedly inflated the currency of the empire and caused the single most devastating recession in the history of the warhammer fantasy world, yes.
Balthazar Gelt, who was also the founder of GeltCoin. Coincidence?!
😂
Local Supreme Patriarch plunges The Empire of Man into Supreme Bankruptcy.
Balthasar Gelt: WELCOME TO ESTALIA GENTLEMEN.
Everyone: I like your funny words magic man
"The fact that gold exists makes all other colors equally inferior" -Emperor
The Man-Emperor speaks
Praise be the Man-Emperor of Mankind
"Gelt was able to end the war without a single shot fired"
"Supreme excellence consists in breaking the enemy's resistance without fighting" - Sun Tzu
Happy SUPREME patriarch noises
*Sabaton Intensifies*
I . AM . *SUPREME*
@@Ghostrebel017 "I will win but never fight, that's the Art of War!"
*I AM SUPREME*
Balthasun geltzu.
I love how some Hellstorm batteries are shooting their infantry in the back and you left it in 😂
That’s skaven tactics
@@santiagosilva2528 would've been if the infantry was in melee xd
@@santiagosilva2528 I'm sorry, WHO'S TACTICS?
They're only spearmen. Acceptable losses
@@kyubiultima5 indeed
6:55 Gold is more dense than lead.
Try to picture your bones being instantly extremely dense and heavy, probably falling outside one's body, tearing apart everything.
Yea, nah. It IS terrifying. The fact that your ennemy could then sell what's left of you to get hoes and boose after the battle seals it. Best leader in battle you can have.
Nevermind the fact that even if you survive this somehow, your bonemarrow being turned to gold means you can't produce red or white blood cells anymore. So if you're lucky, a cold takes your now massively immunocompromised self out before your cells effectively suffocate, as your body is unable to transport enough oxygen to them.
It would probably be a relatively instantaneous death for the victim seeing as the gold skull would cave in the brain matter, but can you imagine how terrifying it would be to witness your friend collapse under their own weight, FROM THE INSIDE OUT.
Pure gold can also bend from pure muscle strength alone. Even if your head didn't cave in, a much more painful death would be possible. Swinging a sword would snap your arm, taking a step would break your leg, turning your head would snap your neck, and screaming in agony only would bend your jaw like the world's worst bendy straw. Your body would literally be tearing yourself apart and stabbing you from the inside with gilded shards of snapped metal.
@@sbraypaynt so the trick to to transmute all of the bones except the skull?
also, gold is as soft as a plastiline. Basically you can mold it with your fingers
Cody drops Noob's Guide to THE LORD OF METAL
*Paranoid by Black Sabbath Intensifies*
*disrant Iron Maiden muttering.*
Flashbacks to the forests of Estalia run through your mind. The smell of gunpowder settles in your nose, just before it mixes with the stench of blood. In the back of your head you hear a booming voice you couldn mever forget, uttering a single word that sends shivers down your spine:.
„Welcome“
"Lord of Metal", Sabbath.. low key Brutal Legend joke?
@@nillynush4899 *it fucken is NOW*
As a chemist, I can tell you that having your bones turned in gold during a battle, would be pretty bad for you, gold is too malleable, and your bones would bend inside you, so DON’T TRY IT AT HOME!!!!
Awww
Blood platelets are also made in the bone marrow. Would be like rapid onset of final stage leukemia.
@@AsaelTheBeast Then you'd have magical gold platelets which are better and shinier.
I am curious what that would actually do to a person, aside from insufferable torment and the forementioned soft bones.
@@8eewee Well, gold is much, much denser than bone. You'd probably gain about a hundred pounds or more immediately.
This would also likely cause your shins to break- or at the very least bend into being useless. I'd bet that would be rather painful. If you had the misfortune to fall on your chest or back, either could easily become seriously deformed- possibly killing you outright and definitely making life difficult. Breathing would be difficult in either case.
Without blood platelets, you'd become deathly anemic. Might take a while to die from that, but effectively you are suffocating because there is nothing to carry the oxygen from your lungs to other parts of the body.
Imagine mastering the lore of death only to find out every spell you know is illegal in the ritual magic duels.
"Representing the Lore of Death: Deathmaster Snikch!"
"He's not a wizard, he doesn't know magic! Hell, he's not even a human!"
"Yeah, we know. Look, the options were doing this or allowing you guys to kill each other. If the Skaven gets out of hand, just prepare to die because we aren't gonna open this bitch if we don't hear all of you confirming that you didn't get shanked thirty-seven times."
"Snikch resent-hate that very much-much."
"I just find it hilarious that the one time GW didn't rip off Tolkien, they created a wizard who vacations in upstate New York yet still complains about how many shekels his Knish costs"
now that line is GOLD
Or perhaps more like Goldstein.
@@MALICEM12 oy vey
"Welcome to Estalia, gentlemen. I will not lie, the chances of your survival are small - some may even turn against your friends as living corpses... But you have my word that I will use my arcane gifts to ensure your bodies are given unto Morr's garden. This is the greatest reward, more than even gold, for the fate of your soul is an eternal concern! Now, come. Follow me, strike down the Undead that rise against us, allow me to find this eldritch amulet. I ask not for my own selfish studies, but for the good of the Empire!"
the last sentence was a lie
“... and his surname Gelt, a reference to the money given to children during Hannuka”
Or, y’know, just the German word for money (yes, technically it’s “Geld,” but GW loved its only slightly German/Dutch names for the Empire)
I was reading his lore yesterday. i'm listening to it today.
I'm obsessed with this supreme lord.
Started an empire campaign a few days ago, and he's quickly become one of my warhammer favorites.
@@melonchilisauce4219 I just got to use his SUPREME artillery (hellfire rockets) a few hours for the first time and i must say that i'm not dissapointed at all.
Just do yourself a favor and don't touch the endtimes. The stuff they wrote for him is bullshit.
"Gelt" is just antiquated German for "money".
Jiddisch, the language used by central European Jews, is a mixture of a lot of languages, but most prominently German. This is also why a lot of the Jews that migrated to the US have German surnames.
Contrary to common belief, surnames ending in "Berg" are not specifically Jewish, they are specifically German. ("Berg" - "Mountain")
"Ashkenazi" translated means: "German". It derives from "Ashkenaz" - "Germany".
Yeah, same goes for Jewish food. It isn't really "jewish", it's basically a culinary mixtape mostly featuring central and eastern europe. Latkes are just common potato pancakes (see Rösti, Hash Browns or Raggmunkar), Bagels are most likely from Krákow (or just German) and by god if you think Gravlax is Jewish i'm legally obligated as a Scandinavian to slap you.
If any Jew or American Gravlax enthusiast reads this then please try hovmästarsås. This is a hill i'm willing to die on. Gravlax goes best with a mustard sauce.
So whats the difference between Berg and Burg?
@@KillerOrca Berg is a mountain. Burg kinda refers to castle, place.
@@KillerOrca burg is typically in reference to a town or city. It is from there that we get the term burgher which means someone living in a city, usually a member of the middle class. This word is itself the origin of the more famous term; bourgeoisie.
Yup. This is why one of the most interesting NSDAP intellectuals was called Alfred Rosenberg.
Aurelian: "Imitation is the sincerest form of flattery, and I am indeed flattered.... Though I expected someone with my visage to be emperor."
If Aurelian was Emperor of the Empire, he would've destroyed chaos in a year at most.
"while raining buffs and debuffs on anyone he deems worthy of his golden shower"
slow clap.....clap.......clap
NOW I get it LFMAAOOOOO
Gelt: “Oh no! I’ve been cursed to turn my skin to this Golden form for all eternity!”
Settra: “Yo, what the fuck.”
I think you meant David Attenborough not his bother who's been dead for like 5 years 🤣🤣
Dagbnabbit. Yes. Ive watched every single one of his specials from the last ten years and still screwed that up.
@@codybonds balthasar is better than fortnite midas, he just touch things turns to gold and use guns
but for b man way better
@@codybonds its fine dude we know who you meant 😂 any plans on Arkhan?
@@Tank1711 Arkhan's story is so tied with Nagash that I really need his model to tell that story. There's a modded one releasing soon, if Total War themselves don't have him as a DLC.
@@codybonds true, I'm just a whore for tomb kings and their lore 😂😂
Turning bones into gold would quickly become lethal, marrow is extremely important.
6:16 Imperial Gunnery School is really turning out great artillery crews, aren't they?
And again at 10:29. A great showing of Imperial Gunnery!
war is hell isn't it?
@@ZackTheChiller it's azumgi engineering at it's finest.
@@ZackTheChiller "War isn’t Hell. War is war, and Hell is Hell. And of the two, war is a lot worse." - Hawkeye
Completly normal phenomena
Imagine being a college of life master in that wizard dueling ring... "Uhm... have at ye?" *heals everyone in the room*
Life magic can be surprisingly nasty in a fight.
You ever seen a man get overheated to get point of it being tumerus I have I was the death wizard who killed the life wizard
It’s so funny how “life” magic styles in fiction are either useless in a fight or a war crime
It's decent for combat. When your fighting someone who doesn't use magic
6:15-6:20 is the best scene. Nothing like troops shouting praise to their flying lord above while being rocketed by their own men from behind!
May I please make the suggestion for the next lord you do to please do Kroqgar next. I don’t know how you have avoided the lord that is literally a dinosaur riding a larger dinosaur, while having a robot arm that can shoot enemies with laser blasts.
only in warhammer is this statement considered normal
I would prefer if he did a video about Mazdamundi, but he did too much videos about the scalie guys
@@brockbabcock3086 kinda boring even
@@poyloos4834 but lets be honest who deosn't like an old school dinosaur laser fight
@@brockbabcock3086 all fun and games until robots and sharks show up
“Welcome to Estalia gentlemen!”
Come on, someone had to post this in the comments
Gelt: "We're going to show these Counts what for!"
Karl Franz: "This - does not have - has my consent!"
I'm not sure how true this is. But I heard that the main reason Karl Franz wears his silver seal is because he's afraid of Gelt walking up to him, turning him to a golden statue and naming himself emperor.
Another knockout, as usual!
...as for next noob's guide, since the vampire counts were mentioned in this one, maybe we dip (poor choice of words, I know) into the Von Carsteins with Vlad next go?
considering how closely tied together they are Cody might as well do Vlad and Isabella in a single video
@@Eclipsed_Embers I mean, you can't have one without the other, so you might as well make it a two-for-one special. Their inherent reinforcement ability at least guarantees that you'd probably have to either do that or make theirs one after the other
If we wanna give him a real challenge, have him do one on Ghorst...
Golden experience now yall!
Just in time, I started a mortal empires campaign recently with him, HE IS SUPREME
No peace! Just war!
I was looking for this video these days, it just came out and i literally howled in excitement lol.
Golden moment.
Good video! As much as I would love to see a noob guide for Lord Skrolk or Thretch, I think the next noob should be about a lord from a faction you never talked about: Mannfed or Vlad for vampire counts, Khazrak or Morghur for beastmen, Orion or Durthu for wood elves or Wulfrik and Throgg from Norsca.
I'm on for all of that except Orion and Durthu. I'd love to see Wood Elves, but they've got a DLC in the works that's probably coming with a major rework. I think he should hold off on talking about the Wood Elves until after that drops.
I'd say do norsca
Vlad is my preference.
Yeah any of those would work
Welcome to Estalia gentlemen. I will not lie, the chances of your survival are small. Some may even turn against your friends as living corpses, but you have my word that I will use my arcane gifts to ensure your bodies are given unto Morr's Garden. This is the greatest reward, more than even gold, for the fate of your soul is an eternal concern. Now come, follow me. Strike down the undead that rise against us, allow me to find this eldritch amulet. I ask not for my own selfish studies, but for the good of the Empire!”
-Balthasar Gelt
It's kinda sad that Karl Franz is the only Empire lord without a video at this point
That action does not have his consent.
Not until I have a clip of Henry Cavill saying "Summon the Elector Counts"
@@codybonds I'd say Kemmler or Vlad would do a decent video.
What say you, sir?
I'd suggest Alberic de Bordeleaux, he's a pretty cool looking knight with a ocean astectic, plus Bretonnia is a badass kingdom
*alberic de generic
Yes! This is the gold I was looking for!!!
The 6ed Empire army book has the official story on how he became Supreme Patriarch. It basically comes down to him and the current Supreme Patriarch (Fire). He turns the fire magic of his opponent against him and it ends with the fire wizard encapsulated in metal (doesnt kill him though). From then on Balthasar Gelt is the Supreme Patriarch.
Every time Gelt hears a rustle in the bushes and turns around, he pokes out somebody's eyes with those things on his head.
Shouldn't have been polishing his helmet without asking first.
I thought the Wizard duel was between Gelt and Thyrus Gorman (the Bright wizard who you fight in one of the quest battles) with Gelt managing to use some magically trickery to make a touch spell hit from a distance, turning Thyrus into gold and claiming the win.
Someone else posted here that it's a short story from the 6th edition army book. Which means games workshop is inconsistent in their lore, surprise!
Missed opportunity to start the video with “welcome to Estalia gentlemen”
-no you cant just melt our entire army!
-ha ha hounds of gehenna going bork
"A Sasha Grey Special..."
So Gelt is gonna sit down with the enemies of the Empire and read their kids story books!
Thats Sasha Grey at her most special.
Gelt: “Welcome to Estalia, gentlemen!”
*Paranoid intensifies
You are the real gold in our life Mr. Bonds. Keep up the awesome work on these noob guides 👍👍
Wow, thank you for many laughs, the jokes come fast and heavy here! Extremely well written, keep up the great work
I like the idea of a Yiddish Balthazar Gelt.
"Welcome to Estalia my boys. Before we go into battle, remember to eat something, and don't forget to visit your mothers when you get home.."
Hurray for another Noob's guide!
You should do one one of the elven faction leaders
I miss those so much.
Keep it up M. Bonds
Welcome to Estalia gentlemen. I really love that line. That entire speech. His voice actor did a great job. I wish all the voice actors did as well as he did
Aranessa is a lot of fun to play, especially with that Saratosa pirates mod. I know you don’t do entire videos on mods for these, but you’ve mentioned mods a few times so I figured it’d be worth a look.
Great Book of Grudges did a video on the Sartosa Overhaul mod.
Noice. Always loving watching the man himself turn Vietstalia into the world's largest statue room. Can we get a video for Teclis, Grimgor, or Thorgrim Grudgebearer next?
Loved it! very witty puns : D
*Fortunate Son plays in the distance*
One big downside to having your bones turn to gold is not having access to your bone marrow anymore which could lead to some pretty severe blood disorders
another awesome video, keep it up man!
I just started a Gelt campaign last night!! Hell yeah!!
Loved the style!
Thanks for making me laugh and lifting my mood, even when im new to all this lore.
warhammer lore is so damn deep, like there's so much occult elements embedded into it, along with the warhammer 40k universe.
I have an archaeology degree, and Warhammer takes alot of digging to find all the relevant information.
@@codybonds yeah its almost like the lore is being made out of no where. I mean come on, the warhammer 40k timeline kind of makes sense if you think about the lore literally. Same goes for warhammer fantasy, lizardmen actually built the mayan pyramids and so on. Its a conspiracy theorist's fantasy world.
noobs guide to mazdamundi, the thiccest toad around
Every shower he takes,
_Is a golden one!_
🐍
💀 no step on SNEK!🇺🇸🇭🇰
Didn't expect to see you here.
I love these videos so much!
I love that your empire elector counts menu shows that you are using mixus lord mods
A noobs guide to either Morathi or Malekith would be really funny
Or you could do a slightly longer episode and do both, they’d be in to it
Loved it :D a fun time as per usual. I would really like to see arenessa saltspite next, tho i admit i dont even know if she has enough lore, i just really like the lord
I used to avoid your videos because im not new to the game and i know what im doing and im so glad i watched them because now im addicted
Great vid!
WELCOME TO VIETSALIA GENTLEMEN!!!
"ikit nukes him"
Noobs guide to beastmen next
It's no secret they have a rework coming. I hesitate to do one on them until that happens.
Wise decision to wait.
So many memes, hot takes and qoutable references! 10/10
Cody Bonds: HAHA JEW JEW JEW
Me: No, that's just an Amsterdammer. Marienburg, yo.
Marienburg is likely coming next year coincidentally.
I'm for some reason very happy that the "Welcome to Estalia" thing was used.
I'm really enjoying your transition to a warhammer lore channel
It's the same skillet as history videos. I'd like to keep doing both types, but it may eventually require a second channel.
"With Gelt victory was assured" As a hellstorm rocket battery keeps hitting that poor line of state troops in the back
My joy is immeasurable and my day is GOLD
It's funny how natural it feels to see the Mixu Legendary Lord Elector Counts at this point. Honestly, it gives The Empire so much more personality as allies and enemies to have them all as unique characters.
I was expecting this video to start with "Welcome to Estalia gentlemen"
turning the enemies gold into lead... that is a thing i never thought of, I'm stealing this
My suggestion for the next Noob's Guide would be either
Vlad or Isabella
The famous powercouple that could only be stopped by the meddling of Mannchild
"With a speed only your boss's son can manage"
GENIUS
I love the smell of alchemy in the morning!
Honestly I think Alith Anar would be amazing for you to do!
re: 6:00
There is actually a full account of Gelt's duel with Thyrus Gormann in the 6th edition Empire army book. The key trick was using a ray of flame to transmit a touch-range spell to Gormann himself, as I recall.
hell yeah hes back at it again
I can’t wait for gelt 2.0 video
Nice video as always.
And as always, I shall leave my request...
you know what it is.
A Noob's Guide to Wulfrik the Wanderer.
Ay, I made that handsome Gelt meme :D
I'm so happy that it finally appeared somewhere (except reddit of course)
Btw nice vid
I made sure to credit you in the description. I also added to it's edges so the Great work you did fills the screen.
My first premiere of these series and it is truly S U P R E M E !
My friends saying goodbye: See ya homie.
Me saying goodbye to my friends: Friendship is more valuable than gold, or so I'm told.
Absolutely great
Wonderful video as always may i request Queen Khalida or Lady Hellabrone next, please?
Remember: if artillery doesn’t work then you’re not using enough artillery.
I would love to see a Noobs Guide to Arkhan the Black just to see what mentions of Nagash would be in the vid!
I figure Nagash will show up in Warhammer 3.
CODY BONDS IS SUPREME!
How about skrolk next? His start is a bit rough, but he has some fun specials, i especially like the undercity plague cauldron
Your videos are awesome
So Gelt is the Dragon Born? I remember becoming archmage with only casting the flames spell. Good times.
Considering gold itself is about five times as heavy as calcium, your bones turning into gold would be really debilitating.
Sounds like King Midas to me)
"... resurrecting the country"
Is that a reference to how he started using necromancy during the End Times?
“Sasha Grey special” Hmm... interesting analogy.