When a man is inconsistent, I automatically remove myself! If a man isn't putting forth an effort to get to know you, take you on dates, or spending quality time with you, then move on!
Yup!… I learned my lesson and now I see the signs very clearly. I also do not want a guy calling me all day and texting all day. My life is full of productive things to do. Show your interest but don’t over do it at the beginning. It’s extremely sexy when a man has his own purpose and his own life.
Exactly! And no texting and talking all day I can’t tell you the amount of lady’s I Noe who thinks this is real. When that’s all they getting out of it.
Nah, once your healed and over playing games, you’ll no longer be attracted in a guys who are too “busy” to see you. Inconsistency is only cute when you lack self love
😂 I literally had. A guy “emotionally invested “ and even travel to see me. 💀 😂 he wanted a long distance relationship. When I started taking him seriously. Game on 😂 I’m so over it. But it was ironic. I slow fade emotionally. My feelings was heavy there. Once I started to see he wasn’t realistic and know what he wants. I kept the text moderate and pretended all was well. Less calls on my end. And I did NOT chase. I slowly detached.
You may still attract them but I feel where the real strength lies is choosing not to “entertain “ them. Because you may not can control who will come your way but you sure have control over who you entertain.
Yes but once a woman is healed there is no way of a man getting away with his BS , if you still fall for it , you need more work. This is why it's important for us to keep our legs closed so that we can see and think clearly
When you create a strong relationship with the most high physical intimacy is the least of importance. A honest, truthful man, that gets his orders from the Lord, now that is a Kingdom man and I will not settle for anything less. God let me know I will have a Kingdom marriage I will be seen, treated right, respected and all the love I will receive will be worth what I have been through. It's close I can feel it and I've never been more happier to follow God.
I do. I also have the man in the box (dildo). It never fails to satisfy. It gets rid of sexual tensions. I can peep game. I also have new hobbies, sewing trying to learn tailoring and couture. Improving my baking skills
The more I listen to Tony and read comments from men, the less I think of men. It's hard to think well of men when their basic thoughts are manipulation and selfishness. Life is challenging enough without playing games to partnered and build with spouse.
I have a gullible look and naive nature, but I’m cold. This dude stepped to me and tried to play me… he got a minute but I bounced and didn’t look back, because I’m always watching you even if I look naive. I’m sweet but I don’t play.
Me too! Just met a guy and what turned me off is the can I come over your house etc. He also said I seem nice ! I didn’t like that word bc it can translate to dumb. I politely told him I am approachable but not a fool. I don’t play games with strangers.
I laughed when I read the title that is the million dollar question 😂 Now I pay close attention and evaluate if a man is what I want very quickly. I usually only spend a few days to a couple of weeks at the most talking to a man and then block and move on if he shows any red flags, inconsistency or player behaviors in that time period. Unfortunately 99% of men do not make the cut. I don't have the time or energy to waste.
99 percent of men are not husband material and play so many games. it's absolutely ridiculous. This is why the birth rates are down and are expected to drop even more
I'm really enjoying my single peaceful life. I really think I could get use to this. So much peace. I mean so much peace. No confusion, misunderstanding, deceit, or disloyalty. Just peace.
I am too...companionship in theory sounds nice but my single peaceful life has become addicting that I'm afraid to let anyone bring drama in my life. I'm also not interested in marriage now that I'm over 50, like most women are. Men treat us like crap because they know everyone wants marriage. And I don't. I also don't believe in monogamy, but I'm not willing to have an open relationship either...so heck, I just need to live alone and go on dates only.
THIS IS WHY I DATE WITH THE INTENTIONS OF GETTING TO KNOW SOMEONE FOR THE PURPOSE TO GET MARRIED- Dating with intention means knowing what type of person you’re looking for and what you’re want out of dating them - a spouse, a companion for the next few months, a nightstand, etc. I GOT NO TIME TO WASTE, IT TAKES SO MUCH ENERGY AND TIME TO GET KNOW SOMEONE. KNOW WHAT YOU WANT AND HAVE A STANDARD FOR YOURSELF TOO.....AMEN....STAY BLESS..
I knew this already I don't drink or smoke and people see you are actually in life fully and want to make you miserable and try you they don't do that to as he was saying someone with sharp eyes as they are as my late mom would say "whole life is a game"
Same, big eyes and small in stature. Men have gotten upset when they took me out and I didn't drink alcohol. They've looked at me and said, "you're a deep person." Another asked me, "have you read all these books?" when he saw my bookshelf. I wish I had someone to tell me how messed up men are because I wasted many years with supposedly "good" men who turned out to be controlling.
A guy once texted me all day every day, except a certain time around halloween. Turned out he was living with his gf and he had 5 kids (not with her) 😅 deadbeat... its always possible! He called only once after I questioned it and one date... wanted to come over to my place sooo bad. Well, I didnt give in and after halloween his gf suddenly texted me 😢 she went thru his phone... smh. INTUITION NEVER LIES ❤
@Eve Heart its okay I was warned multiple times... but didnt wanna believe it before I saw it without my own eyes, without 'proof'. This is a cautionary for anyone, intuition is always there! But often supressed.
@@SpiritualAttitudeSage - Always listen to women who tell you men have another woman. Some men are kind like that, but I have found that men will actively sabotage the relationships of other men. They will say horrible things about good men because they want you for themselves to use.
I stopped putting all my cherries in one basket a long time ago, I learnt not to depend on one man, for some reason it feels sooooo good to have other men to fall back on when a man plays games
Whoever I allow in my presence, I got some chores for them to do. If they don't like it, don't come around me. We ain't teenagers anymore, and my time is precious too.🙏🏽👌🏽🖖🏽
I needed to hear this a couple of years ago, because no one teaches young black girls and young ladies anything about life and men and then things turn detrimental to your health! I am too helpful and I am done with helping men and ungrateful people. I want to be paid for my gifts,talents,time,help,and resources! These men out here practicing with our hearts! AMEN
@@Queenbehavior02177 TRUE, and I'm learning from non black women that you have to be selfish and always be improving yourself with his money or your own,so that when you get older your still able to get remarried and provided for again and of course for your health, well-being and confidence! I want a provider, protector,and a good lover in and out of the bedroom! You want your children and yourself to not have to constantly be in a state of survival and uneasiness! Larsa Pippen is getting everything she deserves from Scotty Pippen because she was not taking the scraps from the beginning and she is his preference! I'm learning when your not special to a man and not his preference he will take everything from you! AMEN! 🙂💄😭🙏!
You have to test the spirit of that man by asking certain questions when he approaches you. If his answers are not correct then, do not give him your number. This only takes a few minutes, it easier than wasting months or years on him if he's not the one.
You are correct Tony, we do not get do overs. Life is precious. Time is valuable. When I see the red flags I immediately separate myself and all communication access. I thank them for their time and move on about my business. I told one guy God is not running out of favor, grace, mercy, love, or blessing. I keep this in mind when a guy and I do not work out. As a woman it is very important to have self-love, self-worth, self-confidence, integrity, faith, and hope. A lot of men like to gaslight or deflect which is very unhealthy that could lead to mental health issues, anxiety, and stress for you. Move on ladies!
You nailed it! I always say like dang why dose dveryone want to talk to me!? Men and women!! Why cant i look unapproachable!!😂 thats why i play dumb at times
Bc we let 'em. Men seem to do whatever women allow, instead of simply choosing to be good human beings and treat women well on their OWN without being forced to with a life lesson from said Woman.🙄🙄🙄🙄🙄🙄
When you said that there is a certain type of look that attracts these no good men, I breathed a sigh of releif because I do have a mean look and these men normally avoid me
Agreed! A man who plays hard to get plays games and wastes the time of real Queen. She is best off to keep dating for a quality man or men or dating and loving herself. She has learned not to be a fool. Quality women attract the worst candidates. Learn to say No. There’s absolutely nothing wrong with the woman unless she chooses to be drug along. When a man is saying he doesn’t know what he wants , RUN . Some women do too much for men who use them as options. Move on to quality.
I'm not attracted to inconsistent, distracted, low- effort men, period. I put myself on a time frame and if they haven't proven themselves worthy of my time, next! Women, guard your maternal instincts! Don't give nothing to a man but conversation, to see where his mind is. If he need you for anything material, drop him!
If us women would just close our legs and date to get to know a man, then we wouldn’t have all these questions and confusion. I have closed my legs because I know that having sex with a man does not make him commit. It actually puts a strain on the relationship because us women start expecting a commitment. Close your legs, date, and communicate. It makes dating so much more enjoyable.
I close my legs and men still waste my time and it's still a question ...Ion always let them keep wasting my time but I definitely do have the question as to why they do...like what's the whole point...
I MUST have a gullible face! Tony tell me why this man hadn’t even taken me on a date, like two weeks into talking to me decides its okay to show me whats between his legs?! And lets be clear, I gave absolutely no vibe that im that type of woman. I blocked him and he had his MOM reach out to me like a week later! He’s been begging me for another chance ever since and I have refused.
Had to let go of a man recently talking about he wanted our first date to be a candle light dinner at his place. I said I prefer out door in a restaurant. My safety is a must,so I let him go.
When you grow up - these stupid games no longer appeal. Life is hard enough already - who needs a guy who cannot be there for you? When you realise that they are just a silly child - trust me the appeal goes and you don't want to go there!
‘If you’ve got a round face with big eyes, you can’t get away with looking gullible and naive’….yiiikes 😂😂 Lord help my wide-eye-round-faced-self PLEASE! Thank Him for His discerning spirit.
Thank you I needed this. I just walked away from a guy wasted my time for almost 3 months. Biggest red flag 🚩 Inconsistency. I cut him off & blocked, he begged and pretty much had hopes but my spirit of discernment led me.
Very true, been there done that. Recently met a narcissist and my God so many red flags. He kept telling lies and he has this female friend who’s a little too close for comfort. Every time he hung out with his “friend” he wouldn’t answer my calls or talk to me while he was around her. It took me three months to figure it out and get rid of him. Thank goodness I NEVER slept with him.
If you look like a tellitubby.a baby Mort from madagascar.chubby cheeks wide eyed... With a baby voice u look small petite and they can sense you are so polite and well mannered. This usually makes people want to take advantage of your innocence.🤦🤦🤦🤦🤦🤦 So sad 🙅
No sir!! Not watching the kids, not investing in the business and definitely not loaning no money!! And the moral of the story is, that is why I am single 😂
My heart weeps for our Black community. The men are supposed to lead us with Love & Pride but rampant abuse & neglect is all I see & experienced. I’ve asked God why are we as a black people plagued with so much toxicity?! Depressing 😢
Read the book of Deuteronomy sis, its literally prophecy playing out. We are the actual children of Israel of the book. And Also listen to the book of Jasher it fills in the gaps and explains why we ended up in this whole mess in the first place. We don't have to keep wondering why our community is suffering like it is. Do the research that book is OUR hidden history.
You're right about the financial part because I heard he left me when the meal ticket expired and found another woman or women. They think they actually took a winner from me LoL you're just his newest victim and once he drains the life out of them he will move on from them because he has zero clue how to be faithful and no ambition on being self sufficient
That's why I listen to people, because they always tell on themselves without realizing it. I don't rush into anything and I put GOD 1st, too many scammers out here. As Madea would say you gonna get got 1st fool!! lolz
I’m too young to have given up on men. It’s not even bc of in-depth experiences I’ve had. It’s from me observing other ppls relationships and hearing soooo much about ppls experiences or watching news. I’m in my 40s and I feel like I’ve entered life in my 80s when dating is def not a concern . It’s sad bf I have decades to come of being single . I’ve become addicted to being in my own company and I LOVE IT. Dating is a distraction. It’s hard for me to continue to talk to a guy after a few days. I don’t have spare time bc I enjoy my own world plus spending time with my 6 yo.
Simple: you let him. I moved on quick when I was dating. I am not having your babies without a ring and shacking up with you; I ask up front what the expectations are and in about a year we need to re-evaluate. If you are not serious then I say hey let’s start seeing other people. Period 🤷🏽♀️
Mannnn i just walked away from an engagement from someone full of lies and looking for a nanny. Tried to marry me fast so I couldn’t see the red flags but I know better. Crazy part I’m not even hurt. I’m relieved.
Man this whole dating thing with trying to figure out, read between lines, detect red flags, following rules, this and that, that and this is so dang tiresome. It's always something or nothing or everything we gotta be able to get or understand or read. It's so much easier to just be alone. A little sad and lonely we may be sure, but the dating game is so exhausting, just to be let down anyways. This is bullshit truly. I was with the same man for 20 years and would always hear single women say it was hard out here. Now I'm experiencing it first hand and going back to my ex looks better than being out here. What's a woman to do?
That's easy said . But if a man wants to waste ur time and u allow it, he will do so. One as to be very keen of who we entertain. It's true when it depends on where that person is in his life. If they are lonely or as Tony stated using u for practice. I dated someone for nearly 2yrs and he called me everyday morning, day, n night as well as video calls. Also, saw him regularly 3-4 times per wk but ultimately, he wasted my time on a topic that was discussed in the initial stages of dating. For other men, they couldn't deal with the pressures of a relationship and his insecurities so it may seem he wasted ur time, but he was just not in that mine space to begin with. It should be ideal that men heal them selfs before dating. As woman, we must uphold our standards, values, and vet for red flags.
That’s true I to had that happen in the past. He was keeping me as a placeholder tho. And he wanted me to drop my guard which I did. He wasted my time on my time. Lessons learned tho my cut off game is sick now. Thank to Mr gaskins.
Chile cheese, I ain’t evaluating anything. Either he goes hard or he ain’t interested and that goes for all stages of dating: talking, dating, boyfriend, fiancé and husband. In or out. Period!
Thanks Tony, this video was very insightful and helpful for me as a Woman. I've been prey to men like this in my past. We all wisen up and learn to create tougher boundaries with men. I vet them all closely.👌🏽😉
Guys can't waste your time, if you have plans B. Therefore you will not get hurt, because you have another plan in place. you also have your Self -Esteem and your Independence ❤
This tripped me out, I never checked my husband phone, yet that one time he choice to show me there was a txt from some chick. And this issue was address and I moved on. I don’t ever bring it up to him.
There is a course … it’s called the Bible Basic Instructions Before Leaving Earth ! Men & Women should try it ! Takes the guess work out and instills the accountability 👌🏽🙏🏼
This video is too timely. I’m dealing with a guy that I feel has been wasting my time and I decided after he stopped contacting me for a week TWO FREAKING TIMES in less than 30 days. I decided to just not even respond when he tried messaging me saying sorry. I’m done. No more wasting my time. Already wasted 2 months.
I'm also in a similar situation but he strung me along for a year but I suppose you can only pretend for so long. Thing is he's in his 40s and has 2 daughters one 15 the other 6. Saw him looking at a trainee like a lion ready to pounce on his prey. She's only just turned 20. Lord help his daughters
👸he went 4 days w/o calln me. it was 😭over. although, it hurt so bad, i learned from tony, if he really likes u, he cannot & will not go one day w/o calln u, so that u know ur on his mind & to make sure ur good😌. he called day 5, i refused to answer, done w/given 2nd chances to getting ghosted no matter how much i like u, self-respect over everything. bye grownboy.
@@queensun6059 Did it hurt because you loved him & you felt rejected? My thinking is there was a soul tie and that's why it hurt. Ladies guard your hearts and bodies. We must allow the Lord to guide us in matters of the heart. Period.
. .Dear women on planet earth 🌎...keep your legs closed and your eyes open 👀...We are the prize and most men will approach because they want something...
Bro Tony this message is so timely, this man I've been talking to so far is wasting my time. But here's the thing I've already slept with him after being abstinence for 3 years. It's just what you've been saying all along I truly knew better after following your teaching to even put this in the comments. to admit I've fell on my back in the bed with this man I've been wanting to now leave this situationship.but once people feelings start to get involved it's kinda hard to walk away cold turkey like that. Because he's expressed how his feelings for me .But on my end I haven't tried to catch strong feelings I've been more so reserved with him not putting my whole heart yet into him. Am asking for your prayers through this 🙏🏾😢
@@akilahbatyah6505 Thank you Sis for your comment on my situation I put myself into am praying about it to go to him and let him know we got to take a break.
Thank U Tony!!!... U are a God send... Oh, by the way, U have sad eyes, not wide ....People may think U a push over, but U don't play when it come to foolishness and disrespect...Continue doing what U doing Bro.......U are helping us!!!....👍💯
I just realized why so many men and women say I look mean from watching your pod cast and hearing the description of how a gullible person may look to others. My eyes are very small and I have high cheek bones. Every man I have ever dated says I looked mean when they first saw me, and they knew before they approached me that they couldn’t get over on me. I am not mean but it’s only so much I am going to allow myself to tolerate. It’s called standards and being ok with living my life alone, if that is how it plays out, before I allow a man to mistreat me.
If a man can't even value his own time, don't expect him to respect yours.
When a man is inconsistent, I automatically remove myself! If a man isn't putting forth an effort to get to know you, take you on dates, or spending quality time with you, then move on!
Yup!… I learned my lesson and now I see the signs very clearly.
I also do not want a guy calling me all day and texting all day. My life is full of productive things to do. Show your interest but don’t over do it at the beginning. It’s extremely sexy when a man has his own purpose and his own life.
Sadly I wish my generation can reverse the improper roles. Some Men deal with women chasing or doing the initiation
Yep. There is someone else and he still trying to figure “out “ things
Waste ur time more
Exactly! And no texting and talking all day I can’t tell you the amount of lady’s I Noe who thinks this is real. When that’s all they getting out of it.
Nah, once your healed and over playing games, you’ll no longer be attracted in a guys who are too “busy” to see you. Inconsistency is only cute when you lack self love
Yep. U will know when to fall back when the games start
😂 I literally had. A guy “emotionally invested “ and even travel to see me. 💀 😂 he wanted a long distance relationship. When I started taking him seriously. Game on 😂 I’m so over it. But it was ironic. I slow fade emotionally. My feelings was heavy there. Once I started to see he wasn’t realistic and know what he wants. I kept the text moderate and pretended all was well. Less calls on my end. And I did NOT chase. I slowly detached.
You may still attract them but I feel where the real strength lies is choosing not to “entertain “ them. Because you may not can control who will come your way but you sure have control over who you entertain.
@@quishia I said you’ll no longer BE ATTRACTED to them, I didn’t say YOU’LL NO LONGER ATTRACT THEM. There’s a difference
Inconsistency is what?? Lol. I mean ad a human being I really did get "too busy" when pursuing my now wife. Every situation is different.
Men waste your time because he isn't even doing anything valuable with his own time. Some people come over to your house to rob you.
Yes but once a woman is healed there is no way of a man getting away with his BS , if you still fall for it , you need more work. This is why it's important for us to keep our legs closed so that we can see and think clearly
👏🏾 👏🏾 👏🏾
AMEN
When you create a strong relationship with the most high physical intimacy is the least of importance. A honest, truthful man, that gets his orders from the Lord, now that is a Kingdom man and I will not settle for anything less. God let me know I will have a Kingdom marriage I will be seen, treated right, respected and all the love I will receive will be worth what I have been through. It's close I can feel it and I've never been more happier to follow God.
Amennn...
I do. I also have the man in the box (dildo). It never fails to satisfy. It gets rid of sexual tensions. I can peep game. I also have new hobbies, sewing trying to learn tailoring and couture. Improving my baking skills
Sometimes their only using you as a distraction from an ex.
True ❤️❤️❤️❤️
Very true
I’ve been guilty of doing this too
Exactly!
Facts
The more I listen to Tony and read comments from men, the less I think of men. It's hard to think well of men when their basic thoughts are manipulation and selfishness. Life is challenging enough without playing games to partnered and build with spouse.
AMEN
Amen!!!
THIS!!!!
This! Women are collectively just tired and exhausted. Hence, the rise of lonely, single males. Not MEN. Males.
@@truetwinflameandspirituala8211 GIRL 👏🏾👏🏾👏🏾
Because don’t come over here messing up and disturbing my peace 🙄
I learned after many years that the reason men came to waste my time is because I simply let them!!
I have a gullible look and naive nature, but I’m cold. This dude stepped to me and tried to play me… he got a minute but I bounced and didn’t look back, because I’m always watching you even if I look naive. I’m sweet but I don’t play.
Me too! Just met a guy and what turned me off is the can I come over your house etc. He also said I seem nice ! I didn’t like that word bc it can translate to dumb. I politely told him I am approachable but not a fool. I don’t play games with strangers.
@@blackbolt6284 good for you! :)
Same here 😉
Facts
We must be twins! ❤
I laughed when I read the title that is the million dollar question 😂 Now I pay close attention and evaluate if a man is what I want very quickly. I usually only spend a few days to a couple of weeks at the most talking to a man and then block and move on if he shows any red flags, inconsistency or player behaviors in that time period. Unfortunately 99% of men do not make the cut. I don't have the time or energy to waste.
99 percent of men are not husband material and play so many games. it's absolutely ridiculous. This is why the birth rates are down and are expected to drop even more
Yes a lot are lacking these days
👏🏾👌🏾😂
Keep doing that, don’t Everett your guard down
You know this is a good idea only a few weeks because men automatically fake to get you so you got to really be observative
Men are hunters forever huh? So how can you ever feel comfortable with being in a relationship with one? This crazy lol
I'm really enjoying my single peaceful life. I really think I could get use to this. So much peace. I mean so much peace. No confusion, misunderstanding, deceit, or disloyalty. Just peace.
Me too 😁❤🎉
Omgosh sammmmmmeee girl !!!!!
I am too...companionship in theory sounds nice but my single peaceful life has become addicting that I'm afraid to let anyone bring drama in my life. I'm also not interested in marriage now that I'm over 50, like most women are. Men treat us like crap because they know everyone wants marriage. And I don't. I also don't believe in monogamy, but I'm not willing to have an open relationship either...so heck, I just need to live alone and go on dates only.
THIS IS WHY I DATE WITH THE INTENTIONS OF GETTING TO KNOW SOMEONE FOR THE PURPOSE TO GET MARRIED- Dating with intention means knowing what type of person you’re looking for and what you’re want out of dating them - a spouse, a companion for the next few months, a nightstand, etc.
I GOT NO TIME TO WASTE, IT TAKES SO MUCH ENERGY AND TIME TO GET KNOW SOMEONE. KNOW WHAT YOU WANT AND HAVE A STANDARD FOR YOURSELF TOO.....AMEN....STAY BLESS..
You in Atlanta 🤭😂
@E Robinson lol I am in Toronto, Canada 🇨🇦 .....stay bless
PREACH!!
I got a round face and big eyes! That explains all the bums I’ve encountered and the story of my life 😂
😅 babyyyy' yes that part. Made so much sense it was the lightbulb when Tony said it
@@reneaw.2057 ❤️😂😂
I knew this already I don't drink or smoke and people see you are actually in life fully and want to make you miserable and try you they don't do that to as he was saying someone with sharp eyes as they are as my late mom would say "whole life is a game"
Same, big eyes and small in stature. Men have gotten upset when they took me out and I didn't drink alcohol. They've looked at me and said, "you're a deep person." Another asked me, "have you read all these books?" when he saw my bookshelf. I wish I had someone to tell me how messed up men are because I wasted many years with supposedly "good" men who turned out to be controlling.
A Private investigator & background checks solve all sorts of problems
💯
Let the church say amen 🙏
Especially for people who never change
Seriously though! 😩
No, I disagree with that!!! All you have to do is ask God to show you if something isn't right about that person!!! and your intuition never lies!!!
A guy once texted me all day every day, except a certain time around halloween. Turned out he was living with his gf and he had 5 kids (not with her) 😅 deadbeat... its always possible! He called only once after I questioned it and one date... wanted to come over to my place sooo bad. Well, I didnt give in and after halloween his gf suddenly texted me 😢 she went thru his phone... smh. INTUITION NEVER LIES ❤
Sorry u went through that
@Eve Heart its okay I was warned multiple times... but didnt wanna believe it before I saw it without my own eyes, without 'proof'. This is a cautionary for anyone, intuition is always there! But often supressed.
@@SpiritualAttitudeSage - Always listen to women who tell you men have another woman. Some men are kind like that, but I have found that men will actively sabotage the relationships of other men. They will say horrible things about good men because they want you for themselves to use.
Unfortunately, many women are choosing to stay single from the games that many men play. Saves you from a headache! So sad.
I stopped putting all my cherries in one basket a long time ago, I learnt not to depend on one man, for some reason it feels sooooo good to have other men to fall back on when a man plays games
Narc season out there....Keep your boundaries up and ya legs closed.
Because he's looking for a place holder until he levels up but sometimes women do the same thing honestly....
No sir! My cut off game is mastered thanks to you Mr gaskins👏🏾👏🏾💯
Not "having a job and putting in applications..." These grown boys are disgusting 😂😂😂😂😂😂😂!!!!!!!!
So annoying
You got it.
Very
Whoever I allow in my presence, I got some chores for them to do. If they don't like it, don't come around me. We ain't teenagers anymore, and my time is precious too.🙏🏽👌🏽🖖🏽
That’s your love language ❤
@@Trendolyn78 Yes, plus I'm tired of the all pretenses. Put your money where your mouth is. I got things to do.
Yep
What chores? Sounds fun and on point! Please inspire us!
PERIOD! They love to play high school games!
I needed to hear this a couple of years ago, because no one teaches young black girls and young ladies anything about life and men and then things turn detrimental to your health!
I am too helpful and I am done with helping men and ungrateful people.
I want to be paid for my gifts,talents,time,help,and resources!
These men out here practicing with our hearts!
AMEN
Me to because I know I’m of value I use to take everybody around me worries away and I’m tired of that to.
@@Queenbehavior02177 TRUE, and I'm learning from non black women that you have to be selfish and always be improving yourself with his money or your own,so that when you get older your still able to get remarried and provided for again and of course for your health, well-being and confidence!
I want a provider, protector,and a good lover in and out of the bedroom!
You want your children and yourself to not have to constantly be in a state of survival and uneasiness!
Larsa Pippen is getting everything she deserves from Scotty Pippen because she was not taking the scraps from the beginning and she is his preference!
I'm learning when your not special to a man and not his preference he will take everything from you!
AMEN!
🙂💄😭🙏!
Don't say black girls in general...I am an African and my mother told me everything..so don't put everyone in the same box
You have to test the spirit of that man by asking certain questions when he approaches you. If his answers are not correct then, do not give him your number. This only takes a few minutes, it easier than wasting months or years on him if he's not the one.
What are those questions?
Please what are those questions 😆😆😆am tired of wasting even one month
I asked all the questions in the beginning. Some lie without hesitation. But there’s red flags that shows over time.
Exactly 👏🏾👏🏾👏🏾👏🏾👏🏾👏🏾👏🏾
Ouuu Chile . Where is the questions honey ? Im tired of them like yesterday.
For their own entertainment
This the one
You are correct Tony, we do not get do overs. Life is precious. Time is valuable. When I see the red flags I immediately separate myself and all communication access. I thank them for their time and move on about my business. I told one guy God is not running out of favor, grace, mercy, love, or blessing. I keep this in mind when a guy and I do not work out. As a woman it is very important to have self-love, self-worth, self-confidence, integrity, faith, and hope. A lot of men like to gaslight or deflect which is very unhealthy that could lead to mental health issues, anxiety, and stress for you. Move on ladies!
You nailed it! I always say like dang why dose dveryone want to talk to me!? Men and women!! Why cant i look unapproachable!!😂 thats why i play dumb at times
Consistency is one of the most important traits of a good man!
It’s a spirit in these men and they just let it control them until they decide they dont want to let the devil use ‘em no more.
Because the devil 😈 shows up 1st ! Don't get distracted !
I always heard that too!!!
The fake comes before the real....
@@cynthiajackson2580 Well mine real one is coming, cuz honeyyy....lol
Noted
Bc we let 'em. Men seem to do whatever women allow, instead of simply choosing to be good human beings and treat women well on their OWN without being forced to with a life lesson from said Woman.🙄🙄🙄🙄🙄🙄
When you said that there is a certain type of look that attracts these no good men, I breathed a sigh of releif because I do have a mean look and these men normally avoid me
I think its the energy you vibrate. They sense the beautiful energy and want to depleat you and take it .
What's the exterior looks? I need to adopt it @@naahfam
Agreed!
A man who plays hard to get plays games and wastes the time of real Queen. She is best off to keep dating for a quality man or men or dating and loving herself. She has learned not to be a fool. Quality women attract the worst candidates. Learn to say No.
There’s absolutely nothing wrong with the woman unless she chooses to be drug along. When a man is saying he doesn’t know what he wants , RUN .
Some women do too much for men who use them as options. Move on to quality.
I'm not attracted to inconsistent, distracted, low- effort men, period. I put myself on a time frame and if they haven't proven themselves worthy of my time, next! Women, guard your maternal instincts! Don't give nothing to a man but conversation, to see where his mind is. If he need you for anything material, drop him!
If us women would just close our legs and date to get to know a man, then we wouldn’t have all these questions and confusion. I have closed my legs because I know that having sex with a man does not make him commit. It actually puts a strain on the relationship because us women start expecting a commitment. Close your legs, date, and communicate. It makes dating so much more enjoyable.
Some of us l€gs are cl0sed since birth...so don't say women in general..say some women.
I close my legs and men still waste my time and it's still a question
...Ion always let them keep wasting my time but I definitely do have the question as to why they do...like what's the whole point...
I MUST have a gullible face! Tony tell me why this man hadn’t even taken me on a date, like two weeks into talking to me decides its okay to show me whats between his legs?! And lets be clear, I gave absolutely no vibe that im that type of woman. I blocked him and he had his MOM reach out to me like a week later! He’s been begging me for another chance ever since and I have refused.
🤦🏾♀️
Did you forward the picture to his mum? 😅
Not the mom
If he’s showing his junk, that means he’s broke. He has no love, money, or growth to give you. Disgusting 🤢 🤮
@@sensimania p
I now use them too. So there’s that! Sick of em.
😂😂😂😂I like that
Had to let go of a man recently talking about he wanted our first date to be a candle light dinner at his place. I said I prefer out door in a restaurant. My safety is a must,so I let him go.
Proud of you!
When you grow up - these stupid games no longer appeal. Life is hard enough already - who needs a guy who cannot be there for you? When you realise that they are just a silly child - trust me the appeal goes and you don't want to go there!
‘If you’ve got a round face with big eyes, you can’t get away with looking gullible and naive’….yiiikes 😂😂 Lord help my wide-eye-round-faced-self PLEASE! Thank Him for His discerning spirit.
Thank you I needed this. I just walked away from a guy wasted my time for almost 3 months. Biggest red flag 🚩 Inconsistency. I cut him off & blocked, he begged and pretty much had hopes but my spirit of discernment led me.
Very true, been there done that. Recently met a narcissist and my God so many red flags. He kept telling lies and he has this female friend who’s a little too close for comfort. Every time he hung out with his “friend” he wouldn’t answer my calls or talk to me while he was around her. It took me three months to figure it out and get rid of him. Thank goodness I NEVER slept with him.
If you look like a tellitubby.a baby Mort from madagascar.chubby cheeks wide eyed... With a baby voice u look small petite and they can sense you are so polite and well mannered. This usually makes people want to take advantage of your innocence.🤦🤦🤦🤦🤦🤦 So sad 🙅
Yup I had a guy say I looked mean at first. He later learned I’m not what I “look” like
:(
Thank you for telling me because some man aren't that truthful
Preach Tony!!!! When a MAN is settled within himself, he will settle for what he desires and deserve
3:30, that may be true... but what you left out are the lies being told... double lives being lived.
No sir!! Not watching the kids, not investing in the business and definitely not loaning no money!! And the moral of the story is, that is why I am single 😂
My heart weeps for our Black community. The men are supposed to lead us with Love & Pride but rampant abuse & neglect is all I see & experienced. I’ve asked God why are we as a black people plagued with so much toxicity?! Depressing 😢
You better date other races,especially Mexican men. Black men are damaged
Read the book of Deuteronomy sis, its literally prophecy playing out. We are the actual children of Israel of the book. And Also listen to the book of Jasher it fills in the gaps and explains why we ended up in this whole mess in the first place. We don't have to keep wondering why our community is suffering like it is. Do the research that book is OUR hidden history.
Deuteronomy 28 Blessings & Curses- Read the curses!
Why? Slavery. Colonialism
Oh hunny. You should see the trash white men here in Australia. Next level depraved some of them. It's just everywhere, the moral decline.
The Answer: Simply bc they want to. If a woman allows them they will. Nothing deep thought about it
Lesson learned 🟰moving forward‼️⏩️👏🏾💯
You're right about the financial part because I heard he left me when the meal ticket expired and found another woman or women. They think they actually took a winner from me LoL you're just his newest victim and once he drains the life out of them he will move on from them because he has zero clue how to be faithful and no ambition on being self sufficient
That's why I listen to people, because they always tell on themselves without realizing it. I don't rush into anything and I put GOD 1st, too many scammers out here. As Madea would say you gonna get got 1st fool!! lolz
I’m too young to have given up on men. It’s not even bc of in-depth experiences I’ve had. It’s from me observing other ppls relationships and hearing soooo much about ppls experiences or watching news. I’m in my 40s and I feel like I’ve entered life in my 80s when dating is def not a concern . It’s sad bf I have decades to come of being single . I’ve become addicted to being in my own company and I LOVE IT. Dating is a distraction. It’s hard for me to continue to talk to a guy after a few days. I don’t have spare time bc I enjoy my own world plus spending time with my 6 yo.
Im SO GLAD i forced myself to start watching these videos.
Omg most men are just hopeless and powerless when you think about it.
Simple: you let him. I moved on quick when I was dating. I am not having your babies without a ring and shacking up with you; I ask up front what the expectations are and in about a year we need to re-evaluate. If you are not serious then I say hey let’s start seeing other people. Period 🤷🏽♀️
I'm so glad that you addressed this Tony, because this has happened to me more than once.. 🙏🙏🙏
Mannnn i just walked away from an engagement from someone full of lies and looking for a nanny. Tried to marry me fast so I couldn’t see the red flags but I know better. Crazy part I’m not even hurt. I’m relieved.
Happy for you!
🙌🏾🙌🏾🙌🏾
Men are so effed up
The standards!!! Yes!! Light (clarity) reveals shadows (unclarity). Know who you are, what you value, there is no reason/cause to accept different.
Man this whole dating thing with trying to figure out, read between lines, detect red flags, following rules, this and that, that and this is so dang tiresome. It's always something or nothing or everything we gotta be able to get or understand or read. It's so much easier to just be alone. A little sad and lonely we may be sure, but the dating game is so exhausting, just to be let down anyways. This is bullshit truly. I was with the same man for 20 years and would always hear single women say it was hard out here. Now I'm experiencing it first hand and going back to my ex looks better than being out here. What's a woman to do?
Stay single till you meet the right one 😘
@@WhyCee74 and thats a big maybe...
I needed this today bc I’ve been debating whether I should continue to talk to someone
I will not let thm waste my time.... Poof Poof ☁....be gone....I will dissappear ✌
My time is my most valuable asset❤Your videos are always Superb 😍
That's easy said . But if a man wants to waste ur time and u allow it, he will do so. One as to be very keen of who we entertain. It's true when it depends on where that person is in his life. If they are lonely or as Tony stated using u for practice.
I dated someone for nearly 2yrs and he called me everyday morning, day, n night as well as video calls. Also, saw him regularly 3-4 times per wk but ultimately, he wasted my time on a topic that was discussed in the initial stages of dating.
For other men, they couldn't deal with the pressures of a relationship and his insecurities so it may seem he wasted ur time, but he was just not in that mine space to begin with.
It should be ideal that men heal them selfs before dating. As woman, we must uphold our standards, values, and vet for red flags.
That’s true I to had that happen in the past. He was keeping me as a placeholder tho. And he wanted me to drop my guard which I did. He wasted my time on my time. Lessons learned tho my cut off game is sick now. Thank to Mr gaskins.
True
Chile cheese, I ain’t evaluating anything. Either he goes hard or he ain’t interested and that goes for all stages of dating: talking, dating, boyfriend, fiancé and husband. In or out. Period!
Thanks Tony, this video was very insightful and helpful for me as a Woman. I've been prey to men like this in my past. We all wisen up and learn to create tougher boundaries with men. I vet them all closely.👌🏽😉
I’m sorry but I couldn’t stop cracking up at the title and the expression on his face & the thumbnail of this video 🤣🤣🤣🤣🤣😅🤦🏾♀️
Guys can't waste your time, if you have plans B. Therefore you will not get hurt, because you have another plan in place. you also have your Self -Esteem and your Independence ❤
You and your wife are a God send. Thanks for your teachings, much appreciated. 🌻🙏🏻🌈
Because that's all he's got to give is time 😊
Very true
Unfortunately...I can relate to chasing shadows 😢
Thank you Tony. That intuition and discernment never fails 👌🏾✨
This tripped me out, I never checked my husband phone, yet that one time he choice to show me there was a txt from some chick.
And this issue was address and I moved on. I don’t ever bring it up to him.
The light was fine, it was the audio that was low, but we still got the message. Thanks for this. It was insightful.
There is a course … it’s called the Bible
Basic Instructions Before Leaving Earth !
Men & Women should try it ! Takes the guess work out and instills the accountability 👌🏽🙏🏼
This video is too timely. I’m dealing with a guy that I feel has been wasting my time and I decided after he stopped contacting me for a week TWO FREAKING TIMES in less than 30 days. I decided to just not even respond when he tried messaging me saying sorry. I’m done. No more wasting my time. Already wasted 2 months.
I'm also in a similar situation but he strung me along for a year but I suppose you can only pretend for so long. Thing is he's in his 40s and has 2 daughters one 15 the other 6. Saw him looking at a trainee like a lion ready to pounce on his prey. She's only just turned 20. Lord help his daughters
Good for you!
Small let downs in the early stages signals big let downs to come! You did the right thing sis you deserve better! ❤
👸he went 4 days w/o calln me. it was 😭over. although, it hurt so bad, i learned from tony, if he really likes u, he cannot & will not go one day w/o calln u, so that u know ur on his mind & to make sure ur good😌. he called day 5, i refused to answer, done w/given 2nd chances to getting ghosted no matter how much i like u, self-respect over everything. bye grownboy.
@@queensun6059 Did it hurt because you loved him & you felt rejected? My thinking is there was a soul tie and that's why it hurt. Ladies guard your hearts and bodies. We must allow the Lord to guide us in matters of the heart. Period.
Note to self: Stay off the practice Team😂😅
😏 I know right
This is exhausting. I see why the fly Aunties w/ all the $ only got a lil friend to scratch a itch. This is too much!!
. .Dear women on planet earth 🌎...keep your legs closed and your eyes open 👀...We are the prize and most men will approach because they want something...
Im so frustrated and losing hope😢
I definitely believe I was “practice” for the last man I was talking to. Smh
I won’t be letting him circle the block if and when he comes back around.
😂"Not messed around and accidentally won"!
You better off focusing on your own wealth and health. Block him sis.
❤😅 his time is wasted as soon as he began to attempt to throw away another 's time ! Stay focused 💯 stay strong n most of all stay growing 💗! 😅😂
in the words of steve harvey ; because you let him!!
Tony always has THE perfect timing with these video uploads! 😩
Lord have mercy. You scared me when you got up and I heard the little pop. 😫
Take a Lickin’ and keep on Kickin’!😂❤
I needed this message.
Bro Tony this message is so timely, this man I've been talking to so far is wasting my time. But here's the thing I've already slept with him after being abstinence for 3 years. It's just what you've been saying all along I truly knew better after following your teaching to even put this in the comments. to admit I've fell on my back in the bed with this man I've been wanting to now leave this situationship.but once people feelings start to get involved it's kinda hard to walk away cold turkey like that. Because he's expressed how his feelings for me .But on my end I haven't tried to catch strong feelings I've been more so reserved with him not putting my whole heart yet into him. Am asking for your prayers through this 🙏🏾😢
Gotta cut off completely for 90days at least if u really wanna let this go. No time to waste
These men are nothing to play with. Hope you make the right decision soon.
If you don’t leave now it’s going to get much harder later on trust me
@@NurseMo337 Thank you sis for your comment 🙏🏾
@@akilahbatyah6505 Thank you Sis for your comment on my situation I put myself into am praying about it to go to him and let him know we got to take a break.
Thank U Tony!!!...
U are a God send...
Oh, by the way, U have sad eyes, not wide ....People may think U a push over, but U don't play when it come to foolishness and disrespect...Continue doing what U doing Bro.......U are helping us!!!....👍💯
Yes those lil puppy dog eyes 🐶. 😂 Tony is the truth, I learn something new everyday.
I am a hunter too!!! Lol
Great video, Tony. You make a lot of sense. God bless you and your family. Keep up the good work.
❤ great message praying 🙏 ❤
I just realized why so many men and women say I look mean from watching your pod cast and hearing the description of how a gullible person may look to others. My eyes are very small and I have high cheek bones. Every man I have ever dated says I looked mean when they first saw me, and they knew before they approached me that they couldn’t get over on me. I am not mean but it’s only so much I am going to allow myself to tolerate. It’s called standards and being ok with living my life alone, if that is how it plays out, before I allow a man to mistreat me.
Facts ..they always have someone else
..it's like what you supposed to do then ?
Why do some men assume a woman is showing him mixed signals if he hasn’t take her out on a date yet? Is he projecting ?
Reverse psychology
Game, run..
Too coward to be direct and secondly lack of accountability on their part.
These men do this because they are ultimately selfish. Ladies love God first in Jesus and your self and don't accept someone who acts selfishly