When Vampires HATE The New Generations Blood
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- Опубліковано 25 гру 2022
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Those poor vampire-Americans' powers are so weak that their reflections even appear in mirrors now.
Vampyr-Kanaduans lol
Well they can use tinder after all
@@OceanBloke They prefer to be called NosferaDoubleDoubles.
Fun thing, originally vampires have not appeared in mirrors because they had a silver linning, and silver was thought of as a pure metal and mirrors reflected your soul.
But today mirrors are produced without silver in them so they would totally have reflections.
Their reflection doesnt appear in silver
I never in my wildest dreams thought I would feel sorry for Vampires. This just isn't fair.
"...I don't want it slipped into my drink, that's unethical!"
Brilliant.
This vampire sketch is perfectly timed for Halloween.
A few weeks ago. Three dudes in covid masks kidnapped me, and fed me for three straight days. I managed to escape. It all makes sense now!
Did they force-feed you 1950s meals?
@@unterdessen8822 They force feed you steaks, EEEWWWW, I had to throw up, just thinking of the poor cows made me so sad
#nomeatpride
That comment made me think about a famous french actor and the following words:
“this is MAGA country “
@@Lusitanean One day we will have justice for Juicy.
"Mosquitos are livin' the dream" lmao
It seems like vamps would make great doctors . Their diag skills are unmatched 😆
Watch the new adventures of... Dr. Acula!
Well, they can tell if you have diabetes by drinking your blood. I can tell by just looking at you.
Fatty.
@@JM-mh1pp Nice!
Uhm... you know, back in the days, when diagnostics weren't that well-developed, physicians had to sip on patients' urine to find out whether they were diabetic. Because you can actually taste it. When your pee resembles Gatorade... yep.
I'm very sorry that you had to find out this way. And I get that you might be in shock, but ask the next available golden shower connaisseur and they will totally admit, that high amounts of blood sugar affect the taste.
yeah, but only hematologists.
It's hard being a vampire when most people's blood is innoculated with weird experimental drugs.
BINGO
You wanted a drink, but you got spaghetti.
Clothes
Count faucular
Things have gotten so bad we can no longer eat other people should we crash in the Andes. Half of the bodies are loaded with spike proteins.
I love that this gets released on boxing day instead of Halloween.
Christmas special in February
wtf is boxing day
@@Thranotheoneandonly day after christmas
@@Thranotheoneandonly Its when you're moving, but get into a fight.
@@Thranotheoneandonly national fight everyone day
Vampires have it harder than all of us smh
no, werewolves are suffering the most, they transform in a middle of a crowd and the crowd goes like "pff, you trans-something, so what?"
Danny just looks the same with ketchup on his mouth 😂
🤣😂😂💀💀
He did
God did
I feel like this could be a sitcom at this point. The material writes itself
Watch what we do in the shadows then ;)
@@hallarious506 Johnny Depp, right? I'll check it out. I've never seen it
@@Ownyx No. You mean Dark Shadows. But that movie was terrible 😅
@@hallarious506 doh 🥴. Ok, not that bad Depp movie lol. Thanks for clarification
How come I kept seeing their reflections in those mirrors? It's got to be that tainted blood!
Still can't take a picture though. Pretty sure is the population becomes gay or drugged enough their social media profiles will look better.
The real reason for the covid vaxx, to make vampires visible in mirrors, or maybe it's just an unforseen side effect.
It's probably because they don't want to be accused of being mirrorphobics. Can you imagine the worldwide outcry they would get from not mirroring like everybody else? They would immediatly be accused of having non mirror reflection privilege and would be canceled, and I think they're already going through enough in their "deaths". I mean, one of them is moving to Qatar just to get himself properly fed and survive, unlike people like Cristiano Ronaldo, who just went there to make himself ridiculously richer than he already is.
“Look I don’t want to sound like my father but-“ “why? What’s wrong with sounding like me?” Had me wheezing 😂
I thought I was getting a hamburger and got a hotdog 😂
U genius u Ryan. “That’s it, I’m moving to Qatar”! 😁😁😁👌
This could be turned into an award winning com-movie
Lizzo is a vegan... I suppose sugar, spuds & chocolate are vegan, so you can still guzzle soda, and stuff your face with pringles and m&ms all day long.
It's obviously chocolates made with soy milk.
Oreos. Oreos are vegan.
Russian Hematogen chocolate is made with cow blood. At some point in history this used to be the worldwide standard for all chocolate. Before we had all that food science, blood was used to help the liquid cocoa soup coagulate and harden into chocolate bars.
The Soviet Union continued to use blood in chocolate even when the rest of the world switched to alternatives, and distributed those bars as medical products to fight malnutrition (which was quite common due to the usual communist food shortages). After all blood has the same amount of protein, that a piece of meat of comparable volume has, and you don't have to kill the cow to get the blood.
I've tried Hematogen. It tastes like normal chocolate and is still produced to this day. Check out the wiki entry. And maybe order some for vegan co-workers you really hate; they won't be able to tell the difference.
@@unterdessen8822 Indeed, I've eaten it. I live in Poland, but 9km from Ukraine. Used to visit Lviv a lot before the pandemic and the war, it's the closest city to my hovel... sigh, I miss Lviv. I love blood sausage though, Kiszka in these parts, Kaszanka. Fried with onion, black pepper, spread on sour dour bread. Breakfast of champions. Serve with strong coffee.
@@brick6347 Try blood sausage + chopped apple + chopped onion. The sausage is melted in a pan and mixed with the apple and onion parts. Then you spread it on bread and eat it warm. Perfect autumn food 🤤🤤🤤
"what's wrong with being your dad" classic writing
Independent fact checkers and snopes have declared this video to be 100% real.
#factchecked
Good to know. I thought it was a sketch but I'm not about to dispute a certified fact check.
As an American of vampire experience, I relate so much to this. Please sheep keep your privilege at the door. We are struggling here; we are the most affected by your health choices. It might just be a donut to you but it’s diabetes to us. So leave your anti-vampirism and human supremacist ideas because we’re affected by your food and health choice. VLM #vampirelivesmatter 👊🏽👊🏽👊🏽
Always KNEW Ryan was a little sus 👀😆🤣
Repelling vampires in the old days: garlic, cross and silver
Repelling vampires now: armpits hair and Arby wrappers.
Wait, shouldn’t Arbies’ blood be decent? They have iron and gluten
You guys are geniuses. A biting commentary on contemporary life.
I see what you did there, lol
🤣😂🤣😂🤣😂 that triple boosted blood be thick asF😂😂🤣😂🤣😂
"Vegan and fat", yeah, that's my sister. She's Vegan but she'll add a bag of cheese to a cheese pizza and wash it down with oreos.
Oops! My bad. I've been corrected and I forgot that there is a difference between vegan and vegetarian. She WAS a vegetarian.
Isn't cheese non-vegan?
@@Sousabird there are some types that are like weird vegan cheeses , but It's unlikely it was vegan cheese considering the oreos too....
@@opdinkleberg7078 oreos are vegan
Is she single.... or double? Either way I'm looking for love.
@@antonrosbo33 oh I know , I just mean that if you're eating oreos with it then I find it doubtful you'd go the extra mile to make sure it was vegan cheese. A lot of people are vegan for ethical AND dietary reasons. Often times it's a combination tipping them towards becoming vegan. If you're breaking your diet generally you'd rationalize eating real cheese in the moment because it's a product thats made without killing the animal ...ect. Different kinds of vegan too , some that are ok with eggs , but not chicken. Some are fine with cheese and not beef ...ect
This should be a recurring sketch
If TRUEBLOOD were remade today, I wonder what Vampire Bill might say.
That's why a vampire should live near a village with access to fresh, healthy food, like Count Draynor.
But you have to put up with that weird old man turning people into chickens.
@@ethanidas3076 Who else would rent that place? Count Draynor had to sublet to pay his bills.
I feel like they saw this room first and then came up with a skit to do in it lol
What about those clots?
Damn! The boys are upping the production game on their videos!
1:45 "Should we try to make the blood look like blood at all?" "No, just dump in some cranberry juice"
My thoughts exactly
Ketchup and chocolate milk makes convincing homemade blood
Ryan long is the man, hilarious as always
Blood type: milkshake
🤣
Ryan’s Italian looking friend hit it out of the park on tone/timing, so good🤣
1:34 😂
"I was going to take this to the grave, but it's taking a little long..." haha
Greatest youtube recommendation ever, great video, subscribed!
Oh man you guys, this one had me cracking up. The best was when it goes all PSA, can't people take care of their health, only so they can kill them and drink their blood. Too funny.
He's Danny's dad!? What a twist man
OMG your skits are gold.
Y'all need to do one where tasting the mRNA is pfucking up the vampire community
They taste like sheep blood....
I was thinking the same thing!! What happens if they swallow a clot caused by the jabs?
That's not going to happen.
Omg true all that was missing is a vaccine joke 😂
@@thatexcalifornian6124 you’re 8 to 10 times more likely to develop a clot from Covid than you are from the vaccine.
Amazing video. Literally annoyed everyone in the house with my loud laugh after the main vein joke
If this weren't already a TV show, I'd say you should sell it to Hollywood as a TV show.
Not, make it a online series,exclusively on UA-cam.
"Vegan and fat?" 🤣
All we’re drinking is blood lite
🤣🤣🤣🤣🤣🤣”why what’s wrong with sounding like me” 🤣🤣 you got me!
Superb! Best one so far - keep it up!
WE'RE DRINKIN' BLOOD LIGHT
"Mosquitoes are living the dream...."🤣
I never heard that before.
Thanks 💌
You missed a joke with "fangs but no fangs!"
several lolworthy moments in there - good work, fellas
Very clever thinking.
I admire this skit.
LOL, “slipped into my drink”. XDDD
Best skit of yalls that I can think of. So funny
What We Do In The Shadows needs to hire you guys as writers for an episode 😂😂😂
This has to be your best parody!
Great job!
Danny is a fake vampire, you can clearly see his reflection in the mirror. Good thing the others haven't detected him yet.
Best vampire comedy since What We Do In The Shadows (movie, not series)
What we do in the shadows vibe. Hilarious
‘I thought I was getting a hamburger, and I got a hot dog.” Try a taco next time.
We're not even drinking blood, were drinking blood light! 😆
Ryan is top tier comedy!
Awww, no C19 jab and “pureblood” jokes? :b
hah chickens
Those white fibrous clots might kill vamps
Yes, that's a little disappointing 🤣
I was definitely waiting for the Vaxxed vs. Pueblood!
Loved it.
“iigh peace dad” 😂😂
The ultimate torture inflicted upon any living being is immortality.
The father part killed me
Looks like one of the only sketches here that doesn't have a comment saying "this isn't satire, this is a documentary"
Jokes aside, they bring up an interesting point:
Are people on medications allowed to donate blood? It seems like it shouldn't bee allowed since the drugs will be present in the blood and most drugs have side-effects, especially if you are allergic/don't need the medication. It seems like most adults in America are on some type of medication. What about all of the different types of CV19 shots that people got? What if a J&J patient gets a few pints of Pfizer blood in their system? Do they have some way of cleaning the blood after you donate it?
>"Are people on medications allowed to donate blood?"
Usually, not
Depends on the medications. They break down a lot of blood into parts.
And not only is the shot okay, Some countries require it.
I assume “remember gluten” is an homage to the funniest comedian of the 21st century.
This needs to be a show on Netflix
I love skits with Aiden in it
So much rolled into this
so inspirational!
'Suckers can't be choosers.' is on a vampire t-shirt somewhere.
Good vid broskis
Finally someone who gets it, I was going to make a video about it but then there's the whole not showing up on camera issue.
1:37 sounds identical to Josh "the Ponceman" Perry from the movie Looper (2012)
Danny’s “cultural” voice change is priceless 😂
haha great vid. Dude shows up in the mirror several times though!
This is so intense. SHOCKING!
The joke that got me was the fact they are all the same age in human years XD
BLOOD LITE that sounds like a Halloween only beer
9.9/10 Reflection showed when asking to taste the blood.
1:46 That Danny vampire has a reflection. Fed!
OMG these guys are pacesetting. So cool.
I'm glad you didn't rip anything from What we do in the shadows 🤘 this is great man!! 🤘 Hahah great laughs
This is so funny!
Getting better boyz.. 7/10
I was just holding it for you dad 🤣
“Yeeessszz a weeeinner” lol
And that’s why all the vampires are in Eastern Europe!
There was a vampire that fed on the blood of virgins
He starved to death in 1968
5 seconds into this video will make you wonder if the Sabbat has a better shot at this
Next level.
I appreciate the attention put towards mythological accuracy. Keeping my red cell count high FAR DA BAYS HUH UH UH
You call them vampires we call them people in Hollywood pureblood for life
I saw his reflection!