That "man" must have been a true healer. Even though that "someone" ended up descending even deeper into hell as a result. Didn't the f****r have the decency to give the man some mushrooms?
Thanks for referring to my comment from your last video. I am so tired of seeing all these positive "enlightened people" that seem to have it figured out. While Im in my personal hell. But i will try what you have suggested and see if that gives me some relief. You are a wise dude. Keep sharing.
"Enlightened people" are enjoying (rightfully) the pleasure of relief and a pink cloud non dual existence. It does only last a certain time on journeying. It comes and goes . We are on This path here and there , up and down, I got it!! , I lost it!!!. Rest assured, no one has the effortless "yummy" stuff for good. It's just part of the road my good friend
Thanks Fellow Seeker. I share your frustration. Thanks for being real. Let's keep holding the space for these "unpleasant " sensations. They are impermenante too... We are eternal.
Same here… to be honest - I believe it’s grace and sometimes I have the fear that most of the people are just doomed to suffer. Sometimes it even makes me angry when I hear how others are perceiving the world, where there is peace and freedom and I just suffer, each single day.
An enlightened being doesn't have anything figured out. Only the ego wants to figure out anything. Including enlightenment. Enlightenment isn't something that you can do from the mind. It's something that organically happens without your control. Try to stop trying to figure out anything and see if you can see everything, including yourself for what they are. They are what they are without any need of a narrative it judgement
This def kinda explains the day to day experience of what “my life” has become. Yesterday was my birthday just turned 29 and life has truly felt like a hellish nightmare I’m living a lot of the time these last few years especially that I could’ve never imagined it becoming. “I” had an awakening experience back in 2017 after getting into meditation heavy, going vegan, making alot of big changes in my life at the time which I know isn’t even a process that has to be done to come to the real “truth” of what is but I was caught up in seeking for nothing but “truth” and the unknown at the time and after taking lsd I had an ego death experience and realized what was always so obvious that I wasn’t who I thought I was, I wasn’t the name I was given because it’s just a name a word, wasn’t the ego, wasn’t the body, wasn’t the mind, wasn’t separate from anything in the universe and felt that deep oneness with all that is. Realized fear is an illusion and felt unconditional love for myself and everything and everyone for the first time and coming out of it it was truly life changing and it gave me my biggest motivation to live from then on which was to be the change I wanted to see in the world, be as selfless as I can and help people try to see what truly is. For years after that until covid hit and alot of shit happened to me that became too hard to deal with, I felt more alive and more at peace and happiness and love than I’d had in my entire life. But around the time covid hit so many things started happening to me that I couldn’t understand why because it felt like as long as I was doing all I could do to try to help people, be as selfless as I could and open minded and hearted as I could be, I trusted the universe wouldn’t do “me” no wrong as long as I’m doing what’s “right”, but it seemed like no matter what things just kept getting worse and people and friends would just walk all over me and treat me bad for no reason and some things happened that really fucked me up in the mind and made me so confused and lost and alone and felt like the universe was nothing but darkness and chaos and I fell into this downward spiral and can’t believe some things that happened that I’m beyond ashamed of that I seriously never could’ve imagined me doing, even though i don’t really believe we have the concept of free will truly at all especially after what’s happened I do still feel responsible though for things I’ve done in my life especially these past few years that I’m beyond ashamed of and full of self hatred and guilt about, this last year I tried to face all my shadows all the shit I’ve done wrong in life and I’ve always had suicidal thoughts since a kid but never actually tried to kill myself til this year a couple times, but things were getting so dark all I could think about was killing myself 24/7 for months, I slowly started finding peace through your videos and when I could rest in the moment more and remember and feel deeply life wasn’t happening to me but through me through everything and everyone and even though I feel like a piece of shit that doesn’t deserve to be alive and don’t really see a point in living at all anymore or any “bright” future in any way and feel like I got nothing but really bad karma to come and more punishment from the universe, I also know everything just is and everything is happening at once right now. And I’m having this experience for some reason beyond the concept of reason and if I take the “me” out of it it’s just life happening and I don’t feel like I’m truly in control of any of it but this “ride I’m on” these past few years has been getting very “dark” “hellish” and sometimes terrifying to the ego, I know all I can really do is just ride it out and see that it’s a ride, but I want to thank you man deeply your videos truly helped me start being able to breathe and have moments of “clarity” and letting go of things again and stop thinking about suicide 24/7 which is something I kinda realized years ago isn’t usually a physical death that people think it is that they want though it seems that way, what they actually want is an ego death psychologically which can help free somebody of that prison of darkness. Letting go of who I think I am and being with what is I know is the only way out. And the “truth” what this is we’re all apart of is truly beyond words, labels, duality, anything the mind can understand or perceive.
Just before I woke up this morning, I had this weird but familiar realization that I am the reason that I feel that something is wrong. It might have something to do with the fact that my mind is a very noisy place and it hurt my ears.
@@divine_presence I agree with your assertion that "what we truly are, is always whole". Still, all of the nonsensical ideas that occur in (my mind, certainly) yours and everyone else's minds, need to be spanked or put into a corner since they're so ultimately childish. That being said, spank those brats if reason doesn't convince them.
I appreciate your point of view, because it seems so similar to mine. I had my first awakening many years ago and it was just the best time. I had always been a very open spirit, but when I moved from Germany to the United States I adapted many beliefs of the people around me to fit in, and without really noticing it, I had lost my way deeper and deeper into the darkness. A bunch of weed every single day 'helped' me cope with it, but also secretly made it so much worse over time. Then I got to a point where I didn't see any sense in any of it any more and had the choice between taking my life or taking shrooms and dealing with it. I chose the latter. There it was again, pure awareness, no more suffering, absolute freedom. Now I see that we all need to be brave. The only way OUT, is the way THROUGH. Every single day I wake up with fear in my heart and horrible thoughts, but I sit down and I go deep into the experience until I find the stillness again. Since your story is very relatable to mine, just know that every time you share your experience here, you are speaking directly to my heart, making it easier for me to wake up again. Thank you.
@@Daniel-1644 isn’t that the proof that it’s all just happening in the brain? The shrooms alter the brain chemistry, The feeling of oneness’s infinite being is may just produced by some chemicals… still a good thing if it ends suffering.
What surprised me the most about facing my own darkness was the way it disappeared and replaced by an undramatic and kind of anti-climatic peace. There are many smaller after-waves though. I will try not to identify with voice that asks “when am I done?”
Thanks for posting. Few talk about the process that seems to occur. I had panic attacks constantly. Instead of running from them, I had to just experience it and say ok here i am. It became so freeing because I was always ever ok & just here.
I agree. The weird thing is that you and I find some comfort or reassurance because of this video. What would it be like to exist without comfort or reassurance?
@cuebist9361 Haha I think the short answer is that it would be scary... But I know what you mean - I am aware of my need for reassurance due to my childhood and learning to work with it
@@malingamurali SCARY is the key term. I suppose that the truth is that IT'S THE GUTTERAL REALIZATION THAT IT IS YOUR MIND that is scaring you in the first place. By that, I mean that I might be figuring out what that means, here and now.
I have experienced the most unique, rare, and terrifying thing which is bad psychedelic trip psychosis. After failing to awaken and being shot straight into a pit of hell, it feels like it’s never going to end. 3 months ago now was my most recent trip, was with the wrong people in the wrong mindset. I made a suicide attempt a week after due to the indescribable hell it was bringing me. Went to the mental hospital, they put me on SSRIs and at first it made things better, but then things just got worse and didn’t get better as time went on. Finally now, I’m fully off these meds and am looking to heal naturally with Shoonya meditation and find awakening this way. Safe to say I won’t be doing psychedelics for now, even though my yearning for awakening is more intense than ever. And if I ever do it’ll be in small doses. It’s so hard to believe things are going to get better sometimes. But I know they will, as long as I put the effort in. Stay safe my friends
1:44 my therapist said “if you rely on your environment to be ok, you become not ok when the situation is not longer suitable”. I learned to be ok with situation, and found the space around me was optional. Namaste ASCENDOR
Richard Rose said one of the most important things you can do is confront your pain (while trying to have no emotional reaction while doing so). Painful memories, fears, your ego, etc.
Everything you talk about is how most of us feel everyday….seriously.. fk.. your channel is my favorite…. Dont let these comments boost the ego, which I’m sure you know.. But let it shows that you’re on the right path and remind stuck people like myself to overcome the onslaught of this crazy mind
I have seen past the veil and understand that this is all an illusion but I still feel mind identified and get pulled back into thought and anxiety. However the gaps are increasing and peace is increasing as well. It feels like onion layers are dropping away to expose my being
personal stuff always feels a bit vulnerable but this helped me a lot more than your other videos. im going through pretty much the same thing you described including the lsd etc. and its very encouraging to hear further confirmation that inviting the darkness in is the way
I noticed how a lot of commenters replied either by thanking you for some relief FROM their circumstances OR sharing their insights from their own "unique" yet VERY TYPICAL circumstances.
Sometimes its about putting your self in charge and putting yourself through "boot camp" in order to blast yourself into special forces-ready military shape. Unfortunately, you need to find a way to be a better-than-competent drill sergeant because you'll end up slipping back into the sewer. That being said, just before I woke up this morning, it occurred to me that all the low-to-high level nightmares I experienced minutes and hours before WERE BECAUSE OF I.
You don’t know Heaven until you experience Hell and you don’t know Hell until you experience Heaven. For me Hell was marrying a man who didn’t love me and living most of my life unloved..religion was a big part. I am still suffering Trauma.. and waiting to experience some Heaven 😊❤
Thank You 🙏. I worshipped idols and coveted. God showed me my mistakes I made at 20. I am asking forgiveness and repenting. The mistakes were mine. Gods commandments are important 😊❤
Did you ever feel a sort of “clogging” in your heart area that feels very sad/ heavy if you focus on it? I tried your advice of accepting it is there but I am wondering if there is something more I should do? I would feel my heart sort of open and it feel good but it still feels “stuck”. Thank you for your content and help🙏🏻
Please look at the camera and not the screen, and forgive me if I commented this before on another video . I don’t mean to be rude at all, I promise . It will make your videos so much more powerful . I will remember that I commented this time and won’t repeat it because that would be extra annoying of me 😆
Thanks a lot for this videos, whenever I listen to this videos, it is very calming but after the videos there is a sense of uneasiness, a doubt that should you deliberately bring your so called negative thoughts and try to observe them or only observe what arises naturally/ effortlessly, and also how to be completely effortless, whenever I try to be effortless, I notice that I am making efforts to be effortless?
Exactly, the same for me! The ego tries to tell you you are doing it wrong and should do it this way to watch my thoughts😂 essentially you are thinking again, whenever you make an effort to be effortless just stop right there and only listen and watch your breath. No need any effort to put your hands on your heart and sense it
@@Roya_Vegan Thanks for your advice. I do get peaceful whenever I am truly effortless but when I think about those thoughts after some time, they bother me again, I mean shouldnt I be neutral to them now?
@unknown20075 do the breath-watching every time those thoughts come over and over, the mind tends to repeat the old and triggering thoughts, the more triggered you are with those thoughts the more breath-watch you should do, step by step it will disappear! The more you practice the faster they go! Don't worry some thoughts stick around more, even when you are worried just feel the worry in your body sense it and do not identify with it then immidiatly back to being aware of your breath! After a while, you will be sick of them but it needs time.much love❤️
@unknown20075 of course, mind does not function without time( past and future) and it always wants to control to stay alive, the timeless Now is the minds threats❤️
😂yeah its all sunshine and rainbows when your in the creative aspect of reality but that destruction will hit you again you shouldn't get attached or fight to feel good all the time nature or god etc will put you through everything not just what you like but at the same time it is always supporting you and fueling you so that's cool most people make this spiritual thing look nice but the truth or at least what i found is that god is not good or bad but is just a force that's always pushing you forward there's no such thing as being in bliss all the time and vice versa you grow and realize god doesn't discriminate or judge good or bad its just about expanding pushing things forward and sometimes bad things have to happen to grow
I have complex PTSD. This journey has been challenging because i will make progress then get pulled backwards because of a trigger. It’s been challenging.
I find my mind won't relax fully, iv been mediating more into my life nearly 3 years iv only experienced like min or less no thoughts. im at a stage so long im really sick off this false self don't get me wrong it's not bad life but same time i don't like the dream it always brother me this so-called world and person.i new since very young it felt unreal. now i cant do my job anymore that i was good at. iv to start all over again train in something not too physical for job. im struggling to find what will i work as the other side realization big interest feel like doing noting. need money sometimes i feel like giving up and go to a master. but alsothey say u need go no where u are the master
Someone once asked a man how he was. He replied, “I’m going through hell!” Said his friend: “Well, keep on going. That is no place to stop!”
Ahahahaha I live this
That "man" must have been a true healer. Even though that "someone" ended up descending even deeper into hell as a result. Didn't the f****r have the decency to give the man some mushrooms?
Thanks for referring to my comment from your last video. I am so tired of seeing all these positive "enlightened people" that seem to have it figured out. While Im in my personal hell. But i will try what you have suggested and see if that gives me some relief. You are a wise dude. Keep sharing.
"Enlightened people" are enjoying (rightfully) the pleasure of relief and a pink cloud non dual existence.
It does only last a certain time on journeying. It comes and goes . We are on
This path here and there , up and down, I got it!! , I lost it!!!. Rest assured, no one has the effortless "yummy" stuff for good. It's just part of the road my good friend
All these people went through their hell, or still going through
Thanks Fellow Seeker. I share your frustration. Thanks for being real. Let's keep holding the space for these "unpleasant " sensations. They are impermenante too...
We are eternal.
Same here… to be honest - I believe it’s grace and sometimes I have the fear that most of the people are just doomed to suffer. Sometimes it even makes me angry when I hear how others are perceiving the world, where there is peace and freedom and I just suffer, each single day.
An enlightened being doesn't have anything figured out. Only the ego wants to figure out anything. Including enlightenment. Enlightenment isn't something that you can do from the mind. It's something that organically happens without your control.
Try to stop trying to figure out anything and see if you can see everything, including yourself for what they are. They are what they are without any need of a narrative it judgement
This def kinda explains the day to day experience of what “my life” has become. Yesterday was my birthday just turned 29 and life has truly felt like a hellish nightmare I’m living a lot of the time these last few years especially that I could’ve never imagined it becoming. “I” had an awakening experience back in 2017 after getting into meditation heavy, going vegan, making alot of big changes in my life at the time which I know isn’t even a process that has to be done to come to the real “truth” of what is but I was caught up in seeking for nothing but “truth” and the unknown at the time and after taking lsd I had an ego death experience and realized what was always so obvious that I wasn’t who I thought I was, I wasn’t the name I was given because it’s just a name a word, wasn’t the ego, wasn’t the body, wasn’t the mind, wasn’t separate from anything in the universe and felt that deep oneness with all that is. Realized fear is an illusion and felt unconditional love for myself and everything and everyone for the first time and coming out of it it was truly life changing and it gave me my biggest motivation to live from then on which was to be the change I wanted to see in the world, be as selfless as I can and help people try to see what truly is. For years after that until covid hit and alot of shit happened to me that became too hard to deal with, I felt more alive and more at peace and happiness and love than I’d had in my entire life. But around the time covid hit so many things started happening to me that I couldn’t understand why because it felt like as long as I was doing all I could do to try to help people, be as selfless as I could and open minded and hearted as I could be, I trusted the universe wouldn’t do “me” no wrong as long as I’m doing what’s “right”, but it seemed like no matter what things just kept getting worse and people and friends would just walk all over me and treat me bad for no reason and some things happened that really fucked me up in the mind and made me so confused and lost and alone and felt like the universe was nothing but darkness and chaos and I fell into this downward spiral and can’t believe some things that happened that I’m beyond ashamed of that I seriously never could’ve imagined me doing, even though i don’t really believe we have the concept of free will truly at all especially after what’s happened I do still feel responsible though for things I’ve done in my life especially these past few years that I’m beyond ashamed of and full of self hatred and guilt about, this last year I tried to face all my shadows all the shit I’ve done wrong in life and I’ve always had suicidal thoughts since a kid but never actually tried to kill myself til this year a couple times, but things were getting so dark all I could think about was killing myself 24/7 for months, I slowly started finding peace through your videos and when I could rest in the moment more and remember and feel deeply life wasn’t happening to me but through me through everything and everyone and even though I feel like a piece of shit that doesn’t deserve to be alive and don’t really see a point in living at all anymore or any “bright” future in any way and feel like I got nothing but really bad karma to come and more punishment from the universe, I also know everything just is and everything is happening at once right now. And I’m having this experience for some reason beyond the concept of reason and if I take the “me” out of it it’s just life happening and I don’t feel like I’m truly in control of any of it but this “ride I’m on” these past few years has been getting very “dark” “hellish” and sometimes terrifying to the ego, I know all I can really do is just ride it out and see that it’s a ride, but I want to thank you man deeply your videos truly helped me start being able to breathe and have moments of “clarity” and letting go of things again and stop thinking about suicide 24/7 which is something I kinda realized years ago isn’t usually a physical death that people think it is that they want though it seems that way, what they actually want is an ego death psychologically which can help free somebody of that prison of darkness. Letting go of who I think I am and being with what is I know is the only way out. And the “truth” what this is we’re all apart of is truly beyond words, labels, duality, anything the mind can understand or perceive.
Sending you love, man.
Love to you
🙏💛
„When you wake up, you instantly feel that something is wrong.“
I feel like that almost all of the time (maybe because it's the truth).
Just before I woke up this morning, I had this weird but familiar realization that I am the reason that I feel that something is wrong. It might have something to do with the fact that my mind is a very noisy place and it hurt my ears.
@@cuebist9361 Yeah, it's all in our minds. What we truly are, is always whole.
@@divine_presence I agree with your assertion that "what we truly are, is always whole". Still, all of the nonsensical ideas that occur in (my mind, certainly) yours and everyone else's minds, need to be spanked or put into a corner since they're so ultimately childish. That being said, spank those brats if reason doesn't convince them.
I appreciate your point of view, because it seems so similar to mine.
I had my first awakening many years ago and it was just the best time.
I had always been a very open spirit, but when I moved from Germany to the United States I adapted many beliefs of the people around me to fit in, and without really noticing it, I had lost my way deeper and deeper into the darkness.
A bunch of weed every single day 'helped' me cope with it, but also secretly made it so much worse over time.
Then I got to a point where I didn't see any sense in any of it any more and had the choice between taking my life or taking shrooms and dealing with it. I chose the latter.
There it was again, pure awareness, no more suffering, absolute freedom.
Now I see that we all need to be brave. The only way OUT, is the way THROUGH.
Every single day I wake up with fear in my heart and horrible thoughts, but I sit down and I go deep into the experience until I find the stillness again.
Since your story is very relatable to mine, just know that every time you share your experience here, you are speaking directly to my heart, making it easier for me to wake up again.
Thank you.
@@Daniel-1644 isn’t that the proof that it’s all just happening in the brain? The shrooms alter the brain chemistry,
The feeling of oneness’s infinite being is may just produced by some chemicals… still a good thing if it ends suffering.
You became one of us "ugly Americans"?
One comes to this video channel to be reminded of what IS.
One is here to know One. Or more so, to be reminded. Many thanks to This channel Maker.💧
You’re wise way beyond your years, my man.
What surprised me the most about facing my own darkness was the way it disappeared and replaced by an undramatic and kind of anti-climatic peace. There are many smaller after-waves though. I will try not to identify with voice that asks “when am I done?”
Thanks for posting. Few talk about the process that seems to occur. I had panic attacks constantly. Instead of running from them, I had to just experience it and say ok here i am. It became so freeing because I was always ever ok & just here.
Thank you Ascendor for this video - I had a rough day and my head is feeling loud and this gave me some things to try out! You're doing God's work ❤
I agree. The weird thing is that you and I find some comfort or reassurance because of this video. What would it be like to exist without comfort or reassurance?
@cuebist9361 Haha I think the short answer is that it would be scary... But I know what you mean - I am aware of my need for reassurance due to my childhood and learning to work with it
@@malingamurali SCARY is the key term. I suppose that the truth is that IT'S THE GUTTERAL REALIZATION THAT IT IS YOUR MIND that is scaring you in the first place. By that, I mean that I might be figuring out what that means, here and now.
I have experienced the most unique, rare, and terrifying thing which is bad psychedelic trip psychosis. After failing to awaken and being shot straight into a pit of hell, it feels like it’s never going to end. 3 months ago now was my most recent trip, was with the wrong people in the wrong mindset. I made a suicide attempt a week after due to the indescribable hell it was bringing me. Went to the mental hospital, they put me on SSRIs and at first it made things better, but then things just got worse and didn’t get better as time went on. Finally now, I’m fully off these meds and am looking to heal naturally with Shoonya meditation and find awakening this way. Safe to say I won’t be doing psychedelics for now, even though my yearning for awakening is more intense than ever. And if I ever do it’ll be in small doses. It’s so hard to believe things are going to get better sometimes. But I know they will, as long as I put the effort in. Stay safe my friends
1:44 my therapist said “if you rely on your environment to be ok, you become not ok when the situation is not longer suitable”. I learned to be ok with situation, and found the space around me was optional.
Namaste ASCENDOR
How did you learn to be ok?
Some practise?
Advice?
🙏💛
Richard Rose said one of the most important things you can do is confront your pain (while trying to have no emotional reaction while doing so). Painful memories, fears, your ego, etc.
Sitting in that soup, as you speak - I'm turning the volume up ☝️
❤️🙏
Everything you talk about is how most of us feel everyday….seriously.. fk.. your channel is my favorite…. Dont let these comments boost the ego, which I’m sure you know.. But let it shows that you’re on the right path and remind stuck people like myself to overcome the onslaught of this crazy mind
Thank you for that video ❤
Love this. I get those less and less but it used to be a daily thing. Waking up and bumping into nervousness & anxiety
Thank you ❤
Youre right on time
For me the rising of energy ends up in panic attacks after the blissful state
I have seen past the veil and understand that this is all an illusion but I still feel mind identified and get pulled back into thought and anxiety. However the gaps are increasing and peace is increasing as well. It feels like onion layers are dropping away to expose my being
I relate to this wholeheartedly. This has been my experience as well. Much love.
love light an sound
personal stuff always feels a bit vulnerable but this helped me a lot more than your other videos. im going through pretty much the same thing you described including the lsd etc. and its very encouraging to hear further confirmation that inviting the darkness in is the way
I noticed how a lot of commenters replied either by thanking you for some relief FROM their circumstances OR sharing their insights from their own "unique" yet VERY TYPICAL circumstances.
Sometimes its about putting your self in charge and putting yourself through "boot camp" in order to blast yourself into special forces-ready military shape. Unfortunately, you need to find a way to be a better-than-competent drill sergeant because you'll end up slipping back into the sewer. That being said, just before I woke up this morning, it occurred to me that all the low-to-high level nightmares I experienced minutes and hours before WERE BECAUSE OF I.
Yeah you’re right.
But everyone can do this when you feel the fear. You can make space within and feel it. Without the drugs
You don’t know Heaven until you experience Hell and you don’t know Hell until you experience Heaven. For me Hell was marrying a man who didn’t love me and living most of my life unloved..religion was a big part. I am still suffering Trauma.. and waiting to experience some Heaven 😊❤
Don't give up.
Much love ❤💞🍀🥰
Thank You 🙏. I worshipped idols and coveted. God showed me my mistakes I made at 20. I am asking forgiveness and repenting. The mistakes were mine. Gods commandments are important 😊❤
😊
❤🙏
this darkness is half of what i am its so huge i growl alot now even when i lagh im like happy f reptilliean as alien making very inhuman sounds
Did you ever feel a sort of “clogging” in your heart area that feels very sad/ heavy if you focus on it? I tried your advice of accepting it is there but I am wondering if there is something more I should do? I would feel my heart sort of open and it feel good but it still feels “stuck”. Thank you for your content and help🙏🏻
🦋🕊🙏
I love your videos.❤ But our nervous system is not broken. Nobody is broken. Its disregulated. Some days worse some days its better. And thats ok.🙏🏽😘
Here is 1am and i can’t sleep 🛌
in meditation when i see monsters from childhood, i fell lot of fear. its very hard to face them. Do you think should i force to face them?
yes i also have the same and they r f huge also sorry u have child trama
Please look at the camera and not the screen, and forgive me if I commented this before on another video . I don’t mean to be rude at all, I promise . It will make your videos so much more powerful . I will remember that I commented this time and won’t repeat it because that would be extra annoying of me 😆
He explains why it is not possible-
It is in the description of his videos
🙏
@ oh ok. I never read the descriptions. Thank you
@@swhite8381
You're welcome
🙏💛💞
Thanks a lot for this videos, whenever I listen to this videos, it is very calming but after the videos there is a sense of uneasiness, a doubt that should you deliberately bring your so called negative thoughts and try to observe them or only observe what arises naturally/ effortlessly, and also how to be completely effortless, whenever I try to be effortless, I notice that I am making efforts to be effortless?
Exactly, the same for me! The ego tries to tell you you are doing it wrong and should do it this way to watch my thoughts😂 essentially you are thinking again, whenever you make an effort to be effortless just stop right there and only listen and watch your breath. No need any effort to put your hands on your heart and sense it
@@Roya_Vegan Thanks for your advice. I do get peaceful whenever I am truly effortless but when I think about those thoughts after some time, they bother me again, I mean shouldnt I be neutral to them now?
@unknown20075 do the breath-watching every time those thoughts come over and over, the mind tends to repeat the old and triggering thoughts, the more triggered you are with those thoughts the more breath-watch you should do, step by step it will disappear! The more you practice the faster they go! Don't worry some thoughts stick around more, even when you are worried just feel the worry in your body sense it and do not identify with it then immidiatly back to being aware of your breath! After a while, you will be sick of them but it needs time.much love❤️
@@Roya_Vegan OK, Thankyou for sharing this experience, I really needed to hear this confirmation.😊
@unknown20075 of course, mind does not function without time( past and future) and it always wants to control to stay alive, the timeless Now is the minds threats❤️
😂yeah its all sunshine and rainbows when your in the creative aspect of reality but that destruction will hit you again you shouldn't get attached or fight to feel good all the time nature or god etc will put you through everything not just what you like but at the same time it is always supporting you and fueling you so that's cool
most people make this spiritual thing look nice but the truth or at least what i found is that god is not good or bad but is just a force that's always pushing you forward there's no such thing as being in bliss all the time and vice versa
you grow and realize god doesn't discriminate or judge good or bad its just about expanding pushing things forward and sometimes bad things have to happen to grow
Is it possable to heal from weed and extreme complex PTSD? or do u have to just kill everthing in the mind total ego death etc?
I have complex PTSD. This journey has been challenging because i will make progress then get pulled backwards because of a trigger. It’s been challenging.
@@Veliccia same and its beyond brutal isent it
I find my mind won't relax fully, iv been mediating more into my life nearly 3 years iv only experienced like min or less no thoughts. im at a stage so long im really sick off this false self don't get me wrong it's not bad life but same time i don't like the dream it always brother me this so-called world and person.i new since very young it felt unreal. now i cant do my job anymore that i was good at. iv to start all over again train in something not too physical for job. im struggling to find what will i work as the other side realization big interest feel like doing noting. need money sometimes i feel like giving up and go to a master. but alsothey say u need go no where u are the master