But it is about you.. I feel that most condescending people have a light switch and tend to be condescending towards those they deem better than them but are in denial about. In term, they are condescending to compensate their feelings of Inferiority
I work at a retail IKEA store and had someone belittle me over something so insignificant. I had told the man that I did not know much about curtains and that I’d get the worker who is an expert at them. He began to belittle me and told me to go in the corner where I belong. He even went as far as degrading me in public in front of people. Thank you for these tips as going forward I intend to protect my space and set my boundaries no matter what. No one should have to be belittled cause of someone’s inferiority complex. Take care and thank you for the good mental health advise. I truly appreciate it! :)
This happened exactly yesterday and I couldn't put my finger on it but gotten emotional tug-of-war and now I am the overreacting sensitive one and it just couldn't put my words on it but that's exactly what I've been experiencing thank you for the insight
In my experience, I don't give them any importance. I feel by telling them they're condescending they will feel happy to have got on your nerves. So, I just speak to them as little as possible! No Serial Killer.
I had that at work. she became so condescending towards me Asking me "Do you even know the difference between pineapple and apple juice?" Little things like that every day. I had been working there over a year. so I quit, and the restaurant cannot operate without me.
Same but in class! She purposely ignores me, I usually say hi to everyone and smile but she constantly ignores me, and pokes at me and my words when I'm having a good time talking to others.
A lot of people are only growing up thinking about themselves. A lot of people are not thinking about people's feelings. It's easy for pictures to criticize and laugh at people. Than care about other peoples feelings. I have noticed that self focused people they like pretending they are perfect. They enjoy acting superior to boost their self esteem. If people show disrespect they lack respect. Ignore drama we will feel calmer. We will be less stressed if we care less.
Set them straigh!! Yes, but how? Usually when you do this they will deny (thats not how I meant it), gaslight (you are being too sensitive) or deflect (I am sorry you feel that way/I dont wanna make you angry). So.... please a video on how to respond in a healthy manner that is gaslight, deny and galight proof!
If you choose grin and barely it, while they are condescending to you just remember that you are only sticking around for a transactional reason and repeat that reason in your head, "I'm only dealing with this obnoxious two faced coworker because I'm here to make money so I have a bed to sleep in and food to eat that's it."
@@dibsidubsi1378 aah, yes. I had someone made a passive agressive comment a while ago and when I asked what he said he told me that I should not mind him because he often says things that dont make any sense. Kinda the same thing you adressed in your comment.
Yeah but this girl I know literally said to me 3 weeks ago "one day you'll end up in a psychiatric hospital" right after me saying that the reason why I didn't study psychology was because I'm very empathetic, so if had become a therapist, I'd end up in a psych ward. She's so mean to me
I work in healthcare and I had a jerk co worker yell down the hall at me to do a task that he could have done but I guess he feels is beneath him. He’s always being sarcastic and belittling. I had several patients at the time that needed my direct attention, and this person works in the office and wanted me to make a bed for a new patient that was coming in 24hrs. I would have gladly done it but I didn’t because his approach I felt was demeaning and wasn’t more urgent than the actual patients that were physically there in that moment.
Hang in there I get you! I work in retail at an IKEA and dealing with the public is just as bad. I had a man degrade me In front of the public and my own fellow co workers. He then basically forced me to apologize and then told me to go in the corner where I belong. It’s hard to pick and choose your battles but I definitely was in shock when it occurred. Now I’m going to take these tips to heart. Stay strong and don’t let people degrade and belittle you! Know your worth and don’t be afraid to speak up for yourself.
@@JuliasCesar Thank you. I did speak up when he kept pestering me about “how I changed” and kept asking me “what’s wrong”. I told him I didn’t like being spoken to and felt his sarcasm was inappropriate and unprofessional and i didn’t appreciate being belittled. He assured me it was his personality and he meant no harm and apologized. He then later made himself the victim and was crying to another co worker that I hurt his feelings. I hurt his feelings for speaking up! It’s ludicrous. That’s why I try to avoid most of my co workers…lol
Ugh, I have a boss like that. She was upset I had signed up for a one-person shift. She scolded the manager below her rank (then 25) for not noticing I had signed up to go solo. When she asked him if she thought I could do the shift, I answered for him with a firm "yes," because I felt belittled by her. She said she didn't think so, was all "I've told you not to sign up for shifts by yourself, I've been very clear about that, I don't know how much clearer I can get for you to listen," and she told me I need someone there to give me instructions and guide me. What's funny is my newer coworkers, who only started a year ago (same time my boss scolded me), are allowed to work shifts alone. Four years prior to that confrontation, and she had no faith in me. I should've said, "Well, we'll never know if we don't give it a try. We'd depending on an _assumption_ about me, and that's not practical." Also, for the record, I can _see_ why she works and manages so many wedding receptions. I'm leaving the job because of her. She needs to know she pushed me to the point of departure
I had an older friend like this, I was forced to limit contact with her. I dont believe confrontation will work because she is very sensitive and due to previous abuse in her life, she is also stuck in a victim mindset. I believe she needs intensive therapy and until change happens i can no longer be close to her for my own sanity.
Nice video! Thanks for the advice. I have a friend who hasn't been respectful to my boundary that I set up when I said I only wanted to play Warhammer for fun but he's not listening and claims that I need to be at another skill level to get more win rates. Not to mention we've had some disagreements lately and he's been thinking that his opinion is a fact. Can you please help with that? I need a way for him to listen.
Humans operate on the basis of social dominance hierarchies in every society so embedded in that framework is condescension of the people higher up the hierarchy toward the people lower down the social hierarchy. Being condescending to others is signaling your dominant status and reaffirming to yourself and others where you stand in the pecking order. Everyone is insecure deep down because nobody wants to be removed from their spot and knocked down but everyone wants to move up. Basically if you are the ultra wealthy billionaire moguls then you look condescendingly down on millionaires who look down on upper class who condescend to the middle class who belittle the lower class who look down on the ultra poverty stricken homeless people and 3rd world country people. People who are 150+ IQ look down on people with 100 IQ who will be condescending towards those with a 70 IQ. It's just how it is. And people who are better off and help people who are worse off are also being condescending even though they are trying to help the less fortunate.
@@Bernadette_Logue my brother just bought a house last year. My sister got a job working for cyber security. We were spending time together and they immediately start talking down about my living situation and that deeply hurt me because they don’t truly understand my situation. how you gonna try to give some advice when I didn’t ask for it ?😢
Hey. Check out the video on having difficult conversations. Providing feedback and constructive input to others comes down to things like: purpose for doing so, energy, tone, choice of words. The video mentioned goes through steps for this. 🤗
But it is about you.. I feel that most condescending people have a light switch and tend to be condescending towards those they deem better than them but are in denial about. In term, they are condescending to compensate their feelings of Inferiority
Hey Kristina, indeed, here's a longer vid on this, and the superiority/inferiority thing...
ua-cam.com/video/3QG5SjOxYXU/v-deo.html
B :)
💯
@Bernadette_Logue can you share the link again? It was hard to click on
Just tell rude people to F off and be done with it !
I work at a retail IKEA store and had someone belittle me over something so insignificant. I had told the man that I did not know much about curtains and that I’d get the worker who is an expert at them. He began to belittle me and told me to go in the corner where I belong. He even went as far as degrading me in public in front of people. Thank you for these tips as going forward I intend to protect my space and set my boundaries no matter what. No one should have to be belittled cause of someone’s inferiority complex. Take care and thank you for the good mental health advise. I truly appreciate it! :)
💜
It’s so crazy how some people are able to belittle someone and be nasty for absolutely zero reason.
This happened exactly yesterday and I couldn't put my finger on it but gotten emotional tug-of-war and now I am the overreacting sensitive one and it just couldn't put my words on it but that's exactly what I've been experiencing thank you for the insight
When I say what i feel in response, especially one person always says, cry, cry, cry or stop being offended or stop complaining, etc
In my experience, I don't give them any importance. I feel by telling them they're condescending they will feel happy to have got on your nerves. So, I just speak to them as little as possible! No Serial Killer.
I love the power of both silence and walking away. 👍
Thank you for this advice I don’t like people belittling me is not right
💜
I deal with this at work with a certain person. But she doesn't seem to do it to anyone else. Just me. So it's hard to believe it not about me.
I had that at work. she became so condescending towards me Asking me "Do you even know the difference between pineapple and apple juice?" Little things like that every day. I had been working there over a year. so I quit, and the restaurant cannot operate without me.
Same but in class! She purposely ignores me, I usually say hi to everyone and smile but she constantly ignores me, and pokes at me and my words when I'm having a good time talking to others.
Amazing thanks 😊 my sister an work colleague does it. I usually take it for so long an then snap but trying to learn to be calm and assertive x
💛
A lot of people are only growing up thinking about themselves. A lot of people are not thinking about people's feelings. It's easy for pictures to criticize and laugh at people. Than care about other peoples feelings. I have noticed that self focused people they like pretending they are perfect. They enjoy acting superior to boost their self esteem. If people show disrespect they lack respect. Ignore drama we will feel calmer. We will be less stressed if we care less.
Set them straigh!! Yes, but how?
Usually when you do this they will deny (thats not how I meant it), gaslight (you are being too sensitive) or deflect (I am sorry you feel that way/I dont wanna make you angry).
So.... please a video on how to respond in a healthy manner that is gaslight, deny and galight proof!
No contact or grin and bare it.
If you choose grin and barely it, while they are condescending to you just remember that you are only sticking around for a transactional reason and repeat that reason in your head, "I'm only dealing with this obnoxious
two faced coworker because I'm here to make money so I have a bed to sleep in and food to eat that's it."
Or things like "but I'm always ironic", "you interpret a lottttt"
@@dibsidubsi1378 aah, yes. I had someone made a passive agressive comment a while ago and when I asked what he said he told me that I should not mind him because he often says things that dont make any sense.
Kinda the same thing you adressed in your comment.
Yeah but this girl I know literally said to me 3 weeks ago "one day you'll end up in a psychiatric hospital" right after me saying that the reason why I didn't study psychology was because I'm very empathetic, so if had become a therapist, I'd end up in a psych ward. She's so mean to me
I work in healthcare and I had a jerk co worker yell down the hall at me to do a task that he could have done but I guess he feels is beneath him. He’s always being sarcastic and belittling. I had several patients at the time that needed my direct attention, and this person works in the office and wanted me to make a bed for a new patient that was coming in 24hrs. I would have gladly done it but I didn’t because his approach I felt was demeaning and wasn’t more urgent than the actual patients that were physically there in that moment.
Tough going there, 🙏
Hang in there I get you! I work in retail at an IKEA and dealing with the public is just as bad. I had a man degrade me In front of the public and my own fellow co workers. He then basically forced me to apologize and then told me to go in the corner where I belong. It’s hard to pick and choose your battles but I definitely was in shock when it occurred. Now I’m going to take these tips to heart. Stay strong and don’t let people degrade and belittle you! Know your worth and don’t be afraid to speak up for yourself.
@@JuliasCesar Thank you. I did speak up when he kept pestering me about “how I changed” and kept asking me “what’s wrong”. I told him I didn’t like being spoken to and felt his sarcasm was inappropriate and unprofessional and i didn’t appreciate being belittled. He assured me it was his personality and he meant no harm and apologized. He then later made himself the victim and was crying to another co worker that I hurt his feelings. I hurt his feelings for speaking up! It’s ludicrous. That’s why I try to avoid most of my co workers…lol
Wow well said ! Ugh does condescending and narcissism go together like a pair often ?
Absolutely never fight with them.
yes, 100%. Set boundaries and go no contact. Silence is a very strong weapon
Ugh, I have a boss like that. She was upset I had signed up for a one-person shift. She scolded the manager below her rank (then 25) for not noticing I had signed up to go solo. When she asked him if she thought I could do the shift, I answered for him with a firm "yes," because I felt belittled by her. She said she didn't think so, was all "I've told you not to sign up for shifts by yourself, I've been very clear about that, I don't know how much clearer I can get for you to listen," and she told me I need someone there to give me instructions and guide me. What's funny is my newer coworkers, who only started a year ago (same time my boss scolded me), are allowed to work shifts alone. Four years prior to that confrontation, and she had no faith in me. I should've said, "Well, we'll never know if we don't give it a try. We'd depending on an _assumption_ about me, and that's not practical." Also, for the record, I can _see_ why she works and manages so many wedding receptions.
I'm leaving the job because of her. She needs to know she pushed me to the point of departure
I’m in the same situation- I just hope I don’t burst out crying or get irrational
@@TeachBeag08 do you have a learning disability too?
B. U R THE AWESOME & AMAZING DOPENESS MY DEAR CHEERS TO U!!!
☺️💛
I had an older friend like this, I was forced to limit contact with her. I dont believe confrontation will work because she is very sensitive and due to previous abuse in her life, she is also stuck in a victim mindset. I believe she needs intensive therapy and until change happens i can no longer be close to her for my own sanity.
Thank you. That's good advice
💛
Excellent advice, I still want to be nice to this person and I think he is subconsciously doing it but it needs to stop
Thank you, very helpful ☺️
You’re welcome 😊
Thank you
💜
I find this so difficult. It would be so helpful if you could help with some scripts.
This is very useful since my own mother does this to me
Teach woman ❤
I lost my rag this morning and swore at them which is very annoying wish I hadn't.. it was one of the receptionist at my kids school.
Nice video! Thanks for the advice. I have a friend who hasn't been respectful to my boundary that I set up when I said I only wanted to play Warhammer for fun but he's not listening and claims that I need to be at another skill level to get more win rates. Not to mention we've had some disagreements lately and he's been thinking that his opinion is a fact. Can you please help with that? I need a way for him to listen.
Difficult
Maybe it's the other way round... Its the lack of confidence and therefore person goes into defence mode.
Humans operate on the basis of social dominance hierarchies in every society so embedded in that framework is condescension of the people higher up the hierarchy toward the people lower down the social hierarchy. Being condescending to others is signaling your dominant status and reaffirming to yourself and others where you stand in the pecking order. Everyone is insecure deep down because nobody wants to be removed from their spot and knocked down but everyone wants to move up. Basically if you are the ultra wealthy billionaire moguls then you look condescendingly down on millionaires who look down on upper class who condescend to the middle class who belittle the lower class who look down on the ultra poverty stricken homeless people and 3rd world country people.
People who are 150+ IQ look down on people with 100 IQ who will be condescending towards those with a 70 IQ.
It's just how it is. And people who are better off and help people who are worse off are also being condescending even though they are trying to help the less fortunate.
Great
🤗
@@Bernadette_Logue my brother just bought a house last year. My sister got a job working for cyber security. We were spending time together and they immediately start talking down about my living situation and that deeply hurt me because they don’t truly understand my situation.
how you gonna try to give some advice when I didn’t ask for it ?😢
From Newzland??
Indeed. 🌎💛🙌
How do you criticize without belittling?
Hey. Check out the video on having difficult conversations. Providing feedback and constructive input to others comes down to things like: purpose for doing so, energy, tone, choice of words. The video mentioned goes through steps for this. 🤗
Hey Bernadette are you on Facebook? I looked you up but I wasn't sure if it was your real profile (so many fakes).
Hey 😊 Here you go... facebook.com/BernadetteLogueCoach
@@Bernadette_Logue Thank You Bernadette. 🙂
Some I’m sure are gaslighting you !