it pays to be married... if you’re a man - reacting to wife surprising her husband with money
Вставка
- Опубліковано 11 гру 2023
- Get the SGSG hoodie: shopisla.co
Subscribe to the Weekly ManifesTEA Newsletter: manifestelle.substack.com
Follow me on IG and Tiktok: manifestelle
In this episode, Elle discusses the benefits of marriage, particularly for men, using a viral TikTok video as a case study. She emphasizes that married men often lead richer, happier, and healthier lives than their unmarried counterparts. Elle also explores the concept of women as 'Proverbs 31' entrepreneurial wives, who contribute significantly to their husbands' wealth and success. She encourages listeners to recognize and value their own power and worth within relationships, and to avoid being exploited or devalued. Throughout the episode, Elle shares her insights on marriage, wealth, and female empowerment with her signature blend of humor, wisdom, and straight talk.
If a male ever asks you "what do you bring to the table?" DO NOT answer. Do not spend a moment of your life to think what you would answer in that situation. Walk away and never look back. If a male asks that, then you already know he is feeble, weak male and not a provider who you should consider as a mate.
I am the table 😂
If any man who asks you that question, just leave. If women had nothing to contribute, then why do they pursue us? They know very well that we do bring something to the table but they like to pretend they're the prize. It's them that need to prove that they can contribute to the relationship.
@@user-tx6lz7pm3ynobody is keeping you from being with another man if that’s what you want
there's no shame in being attracted to men my guy. you don't need to come berate women because you're insecure about your sexuality @@user-tx6lz7pm3y
@@user-tx6lz7pm3y what's the problem? If you consider woman a burden, live your life without any woman. It's as simple as that, and everyone will be happy.
My ex's career flopped when I left. The other ones side business skyrocketed while we were together. Every man who's ever hurt me is failing in life. Call it karma call us coincidence.
Women can improve your life just by existing in it. Simple as.
Love that for him
This! My exes became ugly or sick after I left them bc they all mistreated me and worse. Men don’t get to mistreat us without any karmic consequences!
Same 😈😈😈
Same here 😊
“Women can improve your life just by existing in it”. Yesssss. You put it perfectly. Omg.
If a man tries to say “she didn’t work for the money so non of it is hers” give him the Bill for childcare, cleaning, personal assistance, personal chef etc.
My retired surgeon husband got so pissed and upset when I told him some ppl in the dating game say "what do you bring to the table?". We have 4 daughters. He was livid. Almost cried he was so pissed. No one would ever dare say that to our girls or me.
that's beautiful, we globally need more men like him! And how come it is almost a rarity..like is he coming from a stable 2 parent home himself without childhood trauma? I wonder, what causes many men to develop into resentful, petty women hating-yet wanting beings while others develop to be healthy men who embrace the healthy masculinity.. I wonder what makes or breaks a man from the childhood on... because we women become the victims of that "x factor" more often than not.
@@AmericanDreamerso true
A true high value man 🌱
@@AmericanDreamer I personally think it's their mother or father..
He is high value in his mind, and being a surgeon is a bonus ❤
At your age, it's amazing the amount of wisdom you have. I'm a 50 year old woman, and if I had known what you know at your age, I would have saved myself a lot of misery. Girls, this girl knows what she's talking about.
We are only educated because of social media where we share our experiences, educate each other, and build each other up. I’m in my 30s and hoping that my teen nieces won’t make the mistakes I did 🥹💗🙏🏽
I'm 53 and I totally agree with you. Elle is amazing and our dearest BESTIE : )
Yes! I know! @Allah_Loves_Forgives_and_Saves
I’m 38 and thinking the same thing!!
My thoughts exactly! When I was that young I was clueless!
As a woman your earnings are YOUR earnings. Women live in patriarchy so we need to keep our money as our.
True
Real
Legit
Men are 23 times more likely to die in the workplace than women.
Women receive 33% less prison time for the same crimes as men.
70% of homeless people are men.
Women face lower barriers for entry than men in the Police, Army and Fire Department.
Women have employment quotas in STEM and are often given jobs over better qualified men.
Male contraception fraud is a crime but female contraception fraud isn't.
Men are 3 to 4 times more likely to commit suicide than women.
Boys have a 30% higher college dropout rate than girls.
Women have never faced conscription whereas men have been forced to die for their country in war.
I kept my points institutional because the societal pressures men face would probably need another paragraph; I'm willing to explain if you're curious.
Could you elaborate on the patriarchy you speak of, because I think it's a myth that it serves men more than women. I listed some examples above as to why, but I'd like to hear your side of the story.
Best wishes.
My favorite Islamic rule is a woman's money is HER money alone, and a man's money is the family's money because duh that's the way it should be in a world like this.
My Foster Brother always grumps about 'Gold Diggers" And now I understand that the reason that he was so upset was: 1. He had no gold. 2. Gold diggers were not interested in him in the slightest. 3. that meant his dating pool was lower. 4. That the ladies he thought he SHOULD be able to have, would not give him the time of day, and When one DID, Her Dad nipped that in the butt VERY FAST! I smile about that to THIS day. He always told me I was too picky, So when I listened to him, I married an idiot. But NOW I found my great guy. And My foster bro? is still looking.
True. Rich men don't care about gold diggers . Only broke complain because they don't have the money to impress women.
Yes! Men want to provide, then when they're expected to provide, we're "gOlD dIgGeRs". Pick a damn team.
Eye opening, never noticed but it is usually the broke guys who complain abt gold diggers. Successful men instead capitalize on the fact that their money gives them access to beautiful women and they love it!
The men who complain about gold diggers have no gold to dig. The men who have it know about the gold diggers, and they know the score. Either the relationship is mutually transactional, or the man moves in silence and doesn’t entertain the woman.
Loved your story, but I laughed too hard at nipping in the butt. It's in the "bud" the other mental image is now living in my mind rent free 😂
Every black woman needs to watch this 200x and then understand why divestment is necessary.
Definitely. Divest from below bare minimum, low effort men regardless of race. Last part is mad important
@@HolyyCityyThis. It’s not the race. It’s the attitude. Not all wyt men provide.
No they do not 😩@deejames1st
@@Maggiebenjeeexactly there's no special race of men that will provide unless your willing to be ghetto about it and live off one tiny paycheck in a trailer somewhere sometimes they hang out with bm too so you have to be careful. They think it's some kind of joke or game too to put the wife on allowance when she should be getting a weekly paycheck it shouldn't even be a debate and if it is put him on an allowance until he stops wasting his money.
I'm Asian and there are also providers and non providers (men).
I can testify that race isn't the issue.
Sending love to all the beautiful souls who are putting efforts into improving themselves, and especially to the ladies who read this! ❤🎉
Think of marriage as business, so you always win ladies please
🫶🏽🫶🏽 yes
@@ericksousa8916 we don't care
Just prove you get that man that pay all for you😁
Every one of my exes have mistreated me or abused me emotionally and every one of them has turned either ugly, poor or sick soon after I dumped them. That’s karma doing her job 💅🏼 Men don’t get to play us without deep consequences. Step into your power sis!!
@@wendyhuntsman176 love you, thanks. Have to delete my comment so he doesn't see. Praying for anyone who prays for the healing of my circumstance, God Bless
A man having a stable marriage is social currency for them!!! If they can manage a happy marriage with well adjusted kids it reflects positively on them! Even if Mom does it all!
Exactly!
This support group literally changed my life so much
🥹🥹🫶🏽
My mother was a housewife. Most of the households around us had stay at home wives. My mother (and most of the other wives) all received monthly allowances from their working husbands they could do with as they pleased.
They could save it or spend it however they wanted.
This was common practice and I’m shocked when I hear women now staying home OR doing most of the household labor of cooking, cleaning, childcare, etc. without receiving an allowance.
Some of the women (my mother included) ended up with a rather healthy sized nest egg they’d saved from their allowance.
No one should do any work for free.
What used to be considered standard (the wife allowance) obviously needs to become the standard once again.
But in order for that to happen, women need to do what you’ve said here. Value themselves and their work enough to demand it.
Period.
Those are the type of women who went into their relationship with their eyes closed or romanticized the idea of being a housewife. I put these cards on the table immediately with every guy I dated - you want a housewife, I would only be one FOR an allowance. In the end I didn't even have to settle for this as the man I married said he didn't want a housewife.
Lol, in Japan the husband's salary all went to his housewife, and he got back only a portion of it called "allowance" for his transportation fee and lunch money.
And the allowance (or more like wife's salary or wife's rightful money) must be SEPARATED from the household bills and expenses -- like it is truly her own money to do as she please. And the husband has no right to ask or know what she does with that money -- it is her own business only.
@deejames1st , where do you live?
@@bloodmajesty414 That was the expectation. As I wrote “hers to do with as she wished” and “she had her own substantial nest egg”
I know you probably wouldn't see this but i wanna tell my mom's story here. My mom is pissed at your channel and keeps telling me how i got brainwashed by buncha feminists. She says this, while being a cardiologist who studied for 10 years, who was promised a well kept comfortable life if she gives up her job and becomes a housewife to raise children when they married, by my father(he is a lawyer so that seemed like solid plan for my om i guess lmao). She was a great mother, home maid and a teacher to me and my brother, but she often has this mid life crisis of her lost identity. She says how embarrassing it is to ask for money from my dad (he doesnt share information about his finances and only gives necessary amount of money for me and my brother) she says how it makes her feel like a beggar, given that she can't take care of herself cuz my dad doesnt give her money for herself. She spends it on our education, tutors, clothes, while she has literal chronic pain in her throat for the past 3-4 years and has shown concerns of it worsening each year. Sometimes she gets angry when we don't succeed in academics and guilttrips us with how she gave up her life and career for us only for it to go to waste (she would get uncontrolable and physical, then cry and apologise when i was younger). She becomes pissed, then cries alone on the sofa at night when she meets her former coleages and friends who are successful women with careers. SHe always tells me to never give up my education for no one. They both have admitted on staying together for us, there is no love no marriage there. While both of my parents are great at their parenta; duties, it saddens me with how things turned out, everytime she talks about her university days and how she dreamt of becoming a doctor. And once she become, she got paid terribly (USSSR fell apart at that period, years were hard) and yet she loved her profession. She gets mental breakdowns and starts fights with my dad on how she looks like a homless beggar and how he child trapped her into free labour, how he never did what he promised. It's sad, annoying and sometimes angers me because after all of this she says that materialistic things don't matter and these feminist ideas are too radically against men, and using them for cash is morally wrong. Idk with this woman yall, i love her and i wish i wasnt born but i cant change that now. Your channel comforts me, in my country these ideas are condemned because women aren't viewed as equals tho they get equal rights at work, education,voting, but socially they are very differently judged. It's like a way to release my frustrations, thank you for your videos
I'm so sorry you've gone through this, my heart goes out to you. I hope you know that you are not the problem, you are important and have so much to offer the world and your community around you. Sending love
I'm so sorry for all of it. It saddems me how those people who need help the most, are resistant against it.
Wow
Tell your mother to pick up her books and go back to medicine. It's never too late. When I was in med school, I had 30 and 40-something people starting over and shifting careers to medicine and some had grown kids. Also, it depends on where your mom lives now, but medicine is so diverse. There are many things she can do with her degree besides clinical work. From research and academia to sales rep, drug research, hospital management, nutrition, teaching, labwork, medical translation etc...unfortunately, in my country many female physicians leave their careers because of unsupportive husbands who enjoy putting them down. But I know few who made the best out of their situation after the kids grew up. One of them made bank by private tutoring biology for highschool and college students. Some were licensed to open businesses for skincare and laser stuff, and many more chose flexible specialties that take shorter training like Family medicine. Doctors are in high demand and they can get back to school and get more degrees and licenses in most countries there's no age limit to that, if it's possible she can even change locations where countries take a lot doctors with little or no training like UK and Germany. I hope she can find peace and wish her the best.
Any woman over the age of 40 struggles from the change in feminism at the time. Instead of being able to do all things they thought they Had to and it took away their choice… ironically. This channel reminds women that they can choose whatever they want. They can be “ordinary Barbie” by simply existing. And that’s so freeing.
I just showed my mom this channel she absolutely loves it and is so happy I'm that I'm learning this at a young age as a woman. I'm 21 and i cannot tell you how eye opening this channel has been for me.
Thank you so much for this content. I've learnt so much.
girl SAME im 19, and this channel was a much needed reality check
@@AAA_NNN_DDD I'm very happy for both of you that you've discovered her at a young age. I'm in my thirties and I can say from experience: everything she says about dusties and relationships with them is true. Learn from the mistakes of older women and spare yourselves the suffering.
❤
We are proud of you. Stay focused. Use these principles. Practice them.
Ay I'm 19
I said this back in 2018 and everyone is saying it now. Marriage is a business. I got so much 💩 when I said it now it’s something that’s becoming a norm of thinking
💅🏽👏🏽
Think of it as you being ahead of the curve.
Umm…many cultures know that marriage is a business. Muslims and Jews sign marriage contracts (which include financial stipulations) at the wedding ceremony and with witnesses signatures. Western cultures used to see marriage as a business too until very recently in the late 1800s when love took over as the primary reason for marriage.
@@omowhanre because in the USA it’s about how men can get free labor for there “business”. They talk about it all the time on their podcast. All men have the same mentality, in the USA, the slave work just shifted to people they can legally bind it to, which are women. They use love as a way to coerce women into it. I didn’t understand this concept of thinking until I got married. Nothing, absolutely nothing should be free for a man especially when liability is placed on the shoulders of women once they have children. If she stops working, gets a divorce she is going to go through financial burdens all at once. She will end up working multiple jobs while getting about $200/month in child support. If that. If men want a woman to be a stay at home mom it makes no sense to marry because you are stumping your personal growth which will eventually come back to haunt you if that man leaves or dies. That’s why if you are a stay at home mom put insurance on your husband so if he does die you have money to bury him and also pay for expenses. Good ole life insurance
You know people got all up me like that about not having kids and now everybody doesn't want kids.
I come from a Jewish family and in Judaism, the husband recites Proverbs 31 (We call it "Eishet Hayil", or Woman of Valor) for the woman of the house after Friday evening prayer and kisses her hands. Every single week my father did this without fail. Looking back on it, this instilled in me from such a young age that no good man will ever ask what a woman brings to the table. He acknowledges that we ARE the table and the greatest thing we bring to it is ourselves. If a man doesn't understand that or feels like it's not enough, he's not worth a single moment of any woman's time because he's already trying to downplay and renegotiate your importance from jump.
Well said!
That's so beatiful!
The younger generation is officially teaching the older generation truth ❤️, truth that we older women were gaslighted from in the patriarchal eras that we grew up in, where men ruled all media and we didn’t have channels (or internet) like this for women to speak to women.
Where there is a voice speaking truth, there is also persecution, so take good care of yourself ❤
Yeah, we as millenial women got duped by 2010s girlboss feminism and hookup culture. But I'm happy that Gen Z women are learning the right way earlier. May they be spared the pain and suffering.
I’m here with ya - sometimes it’s painful to take in but the truth is powerful and I’m so thankful. Really happy for the generations coming up and excited for the changes for their lives
We couldn't have done it without the courage of the women of the Suffrage Movement and decades later in the 60s&70s who fought for equality. Millennials fought by normalizing that women have opinions. We were the first generation to broadcast women's voices by watching Barbara Walters, Oprah, and Judge Judy. The generation under us is continuing the flame. Press on ladies!
@@giannid.7794 Patriarchy benefits women? Not even close! That's an absolutely false statement if I ever heard one.
so happy to be here w you all 💖
Next time a man asks, "what do you bring to the table?"... we should respond with, "I am the table." Lolol. 🤭
I would also like to add that as mentioned in the legendary book think and grow rich, a marriage is the ultimate mastermind. Women who intimately know and support their husbands, send them out into the world more confident, satisfied AND they literally watch their husbands backs.
They use their feminine intuition and instincts on their husbands behalf. They see the self sabotage before it happens and privately point it out. As you mentioned, they use their creativity to business ideas and prop their man up to execute them. They cheer them on. They handle behind the scenes work for the business in it’s infancy and let their husband publicly take the accolades.
What BBLEM don’t understand is that not every man deserves this treatment. Only generous, kind, protector, provider men do.
💯 🎉
Omg, your comment touched me so much!
I helped my boyfriend build his business from 0 and he never gave me any credit for that even though I put all my mental and emotional energy in it. Now that we broke up (6 months ago), he still can't successfully start the business alone, he is conting on my help with it, but I honestly do not want to help anymore since he never recognised my efforts and he always said that everything that happened with the business was because HE did it. Lol. But jokes of him, because he still cannot earn a penny from the business now that I'm not helping out with everything...
Men can be just so blind. They take everything for granted but want to put no good input in things...
So I made a deal with myself that I will not date a man until I uplevel myself emotionally, physically and mentally. I will not settle for a BBMLEM again. I will find a provider type of man who has values that align with mine.
Thanks for reading this, I just wanted to share how I feel currently ❤
beautifully written x
The woman who gave her man that money as a "gift" is a lowkey genius. First off, $200 is not that much when we're talking about investments but calling herself an investment just motivates hom to spend more on her. She even suggested that they put it into savings which goes right back to her anyway since it's their money. He's not using it on himself. He'll be using it on her brand/Tiktok so she can make even more. Her Tiktok is not theirs, it's hers. Even if the marriage dissolved she'll still have invested in herself to create the life she wants with a new business that's all hers. Ya'll need to think beyond what you see.
@@user-tx6lz7pm3y you have a funny wig in your pfp 😂
Yeah the couple as a unit are thinking like high income earners.
LOL
My eyes are opening at the moment.
Women who are suffering around me are the ones stuck in a relationship or a marriage, where they feel absolutely miserable. They can't leave because they don't have the financial ressources yet. They are completely drained and also very unable to recognize that they would want to leave.
They dated below minimum men who drain them.
Too many women fall for the sake of love not business
it's not even "love" some times it's just lack mentality and social pressure and focusing on marriage as a goal and a purpose for your entire life instead of seeing marriage as something that is supposed to serve you and better your life not the other way around.@@YouYou-sm8tf
This is why women should always have their own finance secured while also not giving any guy their money. You give guy money and he will use you, but also you become stay at home wife and then have to handle the @buse. Earn your own money but dont give it and keep saving
That's why women need to be educated and able to get good jobs.
This is amazing! The husband invests in the wife and the wife multiplies!
This is sooo true.
I married my husband when he earned what we can say an "average" income. After we got married his income increased by double BECAUSE HE IS NOW A FAMILY MAN. 😂 and you know what he said, he couldn't have done it without me. It happened because of me. ❤ my husband credit his success to me. Now, he gives me his salary and I only give him his allowance and plus some extras for our dates 😄 ❤
Nice!
That's exactly it... calling women a gold digger is an excuse for men with no gold.🤔🤔🤔
I think I heard a recent research finding that when married couples share their earnings (have a joint account), it tends to strengthen the marriage. I support this idea and/or a setup where she has her own separate account just for her own access. It's not a secret, he knows and supports her having her own separate account specifically for her own use. Women need more of a safety net than men and a good provider man shouldn't have a problem with her having her own money. They understand that we are the weaker (vulnerable) sex and support our empowerment. They aren't threatened by our financial independence.
Trust me one can financially abuse you using a joined account
What do you mean by "strengthened" ? Making people feel like they can't leave and ought to work out their issues?
Be careful with joint accounts though. If you have a joint account, you NEED to also have your own personal account as a woman that has enough so that you can leave if you need to. I would recommend having a smaller joint account to cover bills and joint purchases and the rest goes to your personal account. My dad drained his and my mom’s joint bank account and ran up debt on their cards and she had to file for bankruptcy. If you have less $$$ in the joint, that’s less money for him to take if shit hits the fan, he gets an addiction, he gets a head injury and completely changes personality, etc. Of course, vetting well would probably prevent a lot of this.
" My money is my money
His money is our money "
I need to hear this everyday
We also need to embody it , let it become our nature
Guys, he provided for her until physically couldn’t, and gave her money to start her business. In a marriage, you love and take care of each other through good and bad times
The people saying what do you bring to the table, can’t even make a table!! Imagine they want their Grandmas generation of women but they are not the Grandad generation, capable of making a wooden table / house/ fixing with their bare hands…let that sink in😅
And the people who conplain about that only make excuse because they can not bring anything to the table😁
If it was the man giving the woman money they'd call her a golddiggers and him a simp
idk if you're Christian but I appreciate that you are talking about the Proverb 31 woman correctly. Like most things, this concept has been used against women - a woman needs to be like Proverb 31 but not expect her man to be like the husband of the Proverb 31 woman. She wasn't some regular degular. She was a pampered woman of a wealthy and respected man, who provided, protected and cared for not just her but also ALL within the household (i.e. he was not some regular degular man). Boils my piss when people cherry pick.
💯
That perversion of the chapter tends to be a Christian issue. Not so much in Judaism from where the text originated. The passage is used in Judaism to uphold women.
@@tamarbatyah7 Hello, i agree - the chapter is definitely understood within judaism, which is where i got my understanding as a Christian. Personally, to understand my Christianity under Christ, i look to judaist understanding since that is what where Jesus comes from. (to understanding something, it's good to understanding its origin :D) but this is largely missed within Christianity due to the perversion or nationalism, politics and more. Thanks for responding!
i just wanted to say, your channel resonates with me so much and has changed my perspective on a lot. i’m a lesbian, so many of the things you talk about don’t really concern me, but your videos have made me realize that i still devalue myself to be palatable to men, even though i am not attracted to them. i intentionally make myself uglier and hide my femininity to try and be “friends” with them, but i’ve realized that they can’t be good friends and that i have a right to be my feminine self and eliminate them from my life entirely. thank u elle:)
approaching marriage as a business is a good perspective to have especially when watching this. could also be a reason how my parents have managed to have a stable chill marriage for all these years
Men get more money for having children because working, or not ,moms are doing all the work with the kids.
As a 50 year old woman... marriage is definitely a buisness. You can have love but put the business first and the love will come eventually. 🤔🤔
Yes! The whole idea of marriage should definitely be seen as a business. That’s why in astrology, marriage it’s associated with the 7th house of contracts and professional partnerships.
Juppp!!! many people make a 5th house matter out of marriage, while it's actually a 7th house matter
It has always been a business. People decided to bring religion into it and tried to make it about love, that's where all the confusion comes in
True!
I wish I could hit the "Like" button more than once. These are the types of conversations young women should have amongst themselves and drown out the "test pattern" dribble that men are trying to promote.
Test pattern?
Elle speaking English but all I hear is factsss. Could you also make a video on intercultural relationships? I'd love to hear your opinion on that!!
🫶🏽📝
I’m so glad you are one of the spoiled girlies who tell women to get an education or start a business! Always have a back up plan.
In the Patriarchy we would have a much harder time getting a good job if we don’t continue our education or work.
You know what I absolutely love about this channel?
Well the content of course but for me it's the comment section - it's peaceful.
You make the type of content that would immediately get attacked and shredded by the below bare minimum men crying and screaming in the comments and it's so refreshing to have them blocked out of here. I absolutely love it.
Navigating the internet especially for the last 10-15 years I learned to recognize the content that would have a true cesspool of a comment section (and women's spaces that don't pander to men are no 1 on the list), so when I came across your channel, I couldn't help but stay away from the comments - I didn't want to see all the negativity men always spread in places like this. I'm so positively surprised that there's none of that here and we can just discuss women's stuff between women without being attacked, called names, judged and controlled.
I love it here and I love developing my spoiled girlie lifestyle!
same here! 🙌🔥💓
Agreed. I also love how positive this comment section is! ❤
Women are multipliers ❤ He gave him $200 then she doubled it. That's more than enough of what we can bring to the table.
8:32 Proverbs 18:22. King James Version ... Whoso findeth a wife findeth a good thing, and obtaineth favour of the Lord
Amen
Doesn't say the same for husbands though
because the woman is not meant to chase@@BlackRaven000
Ooh, she taught us an incantation! I love it! Writing it down now!
✨Scorpio vibes✨
The timing of this video is so funny to me because my ex from LAST YEAR just popped his head out of the ground to beg me back now that I'm single. I wasn't even particularly good to him because I didn't know what I wanted, but he's been hung up over me since October 2022. Dang.
Secure bag first.
We are in a retrograde rn
You are the literal human embodiment of a goddess. I don't think I have ever learned so much as I have from you. You speak wisdom and Truth. May you be blessed 🙏✨️
My dad is a great provider man. He literally wrote my mom a check every two weeks.
I just turned 16 and I love this channel, ik im not gonna find a 1 mil a year man my age ofc but it has helped me set expectations and keep doing my religious abstinence 🙏🏽💕
Marry or be a pharmacist
That lady giving her husband a check as a gift is so sweet, especially if he’s been treating her the way she said he has❤
A good man recognizes how much you add to his life and will voice that for you.
Here she goes again, saving the world one video at a time! Learning so much from you. This morning my marriage was officially annulled, and I'm free as a bird! Will tread with more caution and make wiser decisions the next time around.
LOVE GETTING HERE EARLY. You are helping me decenter men from my friend’s brain. She deserves to be a spoiled girly too.
" If it ( women's labor ) has no value, we keep doing it for free "
This was my mindset too for many, many years but now Ive decided, SINCE, my labour has no value, then why provide these mxn with services and labor that add NOTHING to their lives ? Besides, a woman's labor is stressful and hardwork.
Since it has 0 value, wouldnt it make more sense to just stop performing altogether ?
Its the easiee route for me since I need not take action and do anything and plus, he will be happy since I am not adding undervalued services and treatment for him. He can seek those things elsewhere.
The fact that he is so emotional tells you everything! He is so appreciative that she is putting in to their finances to make their family and his life easier.... it's everything!! 👍
I’ve worked all my life from a young age (babysitting for money at the age of 7 for people that were not family. Also cleaning houses), and am now retired. I don’t draw retirement yet, but had money saved up… we (my husband and I) bought a new house, paid off our car, and a second house (a rental that’s mine) and I was out of cash… my husband seeded a hobby that I turned into an online business that now casually makes 5-7k a year from a starting amount of about 500 (this income doesn’t include the passive rental income).
I always make money. If you invest in a woman, she’s going to make a positive return of some kind 💯
These men need to understand that, and bow to it
9:07 "thats like paying to work a job" nailed it.
As someone who's been boy obsessed my whole life and wants to get married, you're turning me into a misandrist 😂
We REALLY have to choose wisely
“Misandrists” are just intelligent women.
Yes Elle!!! We should create a groupchat for the spoiled girlies to connect
As a muslim i’m baffled to hear you say ‘his money is my money and my money is my money’. In islam this is a right of the woman set 1400 years ago by the Prophet Muhammad and they still say Islam is an oppressive religion on a women! Thank you explaining the statement so well ❤
In Islam the word for marriage is ‘Nikah’ which translates to ‘transaction’ or ‘marital contract’.
Thank you for spreading the truth! gorgeous hair & skin as always!!!
My theory: your skin clears up when you stop messing with garbage men.
@@MrsLadyLibertyTHIS IS FACT! Trash people in GENERAL! My skin took a huge decline last year dealing with toxic ass people. My skin was so dull,started getting itchy stress hives ,and even my energy was so bleh. After the situations were over my skin instantly cleared up,I no longer get stress hives,my energy is back,AND I’m always GLOWING!
I love these videos.
17:30 Absolutely. That's one of the first things I learned in a relationship. Every time I left, the man I dated came crying back to me because he learned that I made his life better. When I left, his life went downhill. Even his friends told me that.
Also, it's even more ridiculous because the men always return, promising to change. If I've left already, it's too late for the man to change. And, men don't change themselves unless they have to. Why would they change if I'm still dating them while they're still misbehaving? When I changed, they changed. When I left, they changed, but who wants a man that needs to change? Why would I waste my time with a man whom I know I will leave anyway? Make better choices upfront. That's why these videos are so true.
They ask what you bring to the table WHILE THEY’RE LITERALLY EATING AT YOUR TABLE (taking up your time/energy)-I LOVE THIS 😭💗
Girl you are SOOOO right, like each time I left relationship his life got worse or just mid, while each new relationship got better for me and I got richer.
I recently saw a guy I cut off for wasting my time and he gained so much weight, like he was depression eating from me not being around.
She chose to do that to make him happy,maybe he is an awesome person.i am happy for both of them.
Agreed 💯. My spouse put me through a MSN program. When COVID HIT I made more money than I ever made in my life. I was able to finance our home renovation without a costly hone equity loan.
I am always here for you breaking it down for the “no - nuance - nellies “. 😂😂
@11:25 "only be a stay at home...for someone who can replace your income" --key! 🔑
Hey besties! An older lady told me that she thinks taking men out to self care dates or giving them gentle treatment or taking them to such self care dates makes a man feminine and I don't have that much experience so what do you guys thinks?
My guy and I got pedicures together, he paid for both, and he is far from a feminine man. It’s not about the date being a self-care date. It’s that you keep giving to your man and he keeps receiving and gets into his “divine feminine receiving energy” or whatever Elle says 😂 and he stops being the man and taking care of you. Doing self care together should be fun. Or at least it is fun for the girl and the guy just wants to see her enjoy herself there 😊
Nah that's cap. She just has some internalized misogyny. Sassy men are men who just take and take from you without pouring into you. Men are human too. Not that you should give a man all your savings but occasional gift giving and affection goes a long way. Only do this If he does the same for you
He us not your best girlfriend,,, you can recommend a place if he got a problem,,, but don't polish him and pamper him to be snatched by other woman or he get in touch with his femininity,, leave it
I will not involve my masculine partner in my feminine self care secrecy. Some things are just better left unsaid and unshown
I am a Miami girl lol thank you for that info!
I love that he considered her his most important investment. What a great example, thank you for sharing bestie!
Beautiful…giving & receiving =Balance in a relationship ❤
you're like the teacher i never had Elle! thank you for having such a positive impact on many lives out here.
This is pure gold. It is one for The Archives.
“Whoso findeth a wife findeth a good thing, And obtaineth favour of the LORD.”
Proverbs 18:22 KJV
…. And let the church say amen ☕️
Amen 🙌🙌
I love having my own money. Money i worked hard in building, saving, and a bit of spoiling myself. There is so much power in this
Sooo happy to see this channel growing and thriving. you're saving lives out here
❤❤❤❤ love love being part of this support group ✨
I’m bingeing your videos Elle so that I can reprogram my brain out of thinking that “there’s so much competition for a husband, I need to prove myself worthy… “
Like nope i am the prize, men benefit just from being around me, I am the source of men’s desires and any man who puts me down is not a good man but wants to take from women without providing
Love this message! So happy to see young women begin to value themselves more and protect their own energy.
Thank you, Elle! Marriage is a joint business venture, thank you for reminding us ❤
I love you, Elle
And i wish happiness for every sis out here
Thank you so much for making these videos. You have no idea how they gave me clarity, courage, and pride. You changed my perspective and helped me see my value. I really wish I learned these things when I was younger. I’m in my 30s now. How different my life would have been if I knew these things 15 years ago. So so much better for sure. Thank you. You are amazing, Elle.
The video of her giving the money to share with her husband made me cry it was so sweet. I’m so happy for them.
I adore how often you post. 💓
Thank you for sharing your thoughts with us. 😊
I look forward to your every video! Thank you for another informative download, Elle.
Honestly that first video made me cry 💖 so beautiful to witness true love
Great content! Love your delivery as well
It's true... my x is more of a loser now than he ever was. He wanted to control me and to do everything without his help, and now he is alone with nothing. I have a man, I have my own place while he is alone and miserable because he refused to believe that I deserved anything at all.
If he’s still in your face and asking what you bring to the table, he knows your value, that’s why he’s still is in your face. If you didn’t benefit him, he’d just leave. He’s trying to get a bargain on your worth down to the lowest payment. He either can’t afford it or doesn’t want to put the effort it takes to meet you where you’re at. You’re not at a yard sale. Tell him to pound sand or get with the program. Men that get anything for free doesn’t respect it. If they worked for it they’ll take care of it. If he knows it can go at anytime, he’d continue to be on good behavior
love you Elle!! thank you for all you and the spoiled girlies do! 🖤
I love that spoke about Proverbs 31. You're videos are always so insightful 💖
I saw a lot on social media about how women have inherent worth but never saw a clear laid out explanation until today! Love this video so much!
Your content is always amazing but you last words were simply magnificent !! And I swear to God, I don't know why but I was kind of thinking about this exact same thing since yesterday evening and I watch you today saying it in a more elegant way. it's amazing how some things are repeated like a sign, glory to God... thank you for this amazing video! 🥰
We are an investment; we have inherent ROI and multiply what we receive 🧘♀️
Thank you for the videos Elle. I have been watching all of your content and it is so affirming after leaving my emotionally BBMLE man that could not stop hurting my feelings. Kinda do hope that his life will be worse without me, but in the end I’d rather not care about him at all.
Let’s not forget all the discounts men get JUST FOR BEING MARRIED you literally make their bills cheaper!!!
I’m stuck with a sorry excuse for a man, but once I manage to put enough together to escape I’m standing on my values. Lesson learned!! Listen to her; don’t let them abuse your kindness to keep you stuck with an asshole!!! ❤️❤️
Am genuinely happy for them because they both invested on each other so as long as they happy ❤
I love you so much. Thank you for saying it better than I could
thanks Elle!!!!
Thank you bestie
I love your videos! ❤ Beautiful, wise and funny.