WHY DO WE PUSH LOVE AWAY | Self-Sabotage in Relationships: The Cause and Solution | Wu Wei Wisdom

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  • Опубліковано 28 січ 2025

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  • @WuWeiWisdom
    @WuWeiWisdom  4 роки тому +3

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    • @CosmicHealingGoddess
      @CosmicHealingGoddess 4 роки тому +1

      But doesn’t 95% of subconscious mind controls your conscious mind, hence what’s buried in the subconscious is what plays out in our life and I believe a lot of ppl are not aware of the programs / beliefs carried in the sub-c mind and that’s what’s impacting their current life circumstances

  • @ninah5938
    @ninah5938 4 роки тому +7

    OMG, this explains my situation 100%. I sabotaged a wonderful relationship and lost a wonderful man. Thankfully I always take full responsibility for my behaviour. This video has been added to my favourites. Thank you so much 🙏🏾

  • @lorraineash4992
    @lorraineash4992 4 роки тому +6

    Ewwww . . . I feel like I’ve just been totally exposed!!😱 this is one of my favourite vids to date . . Explaining all the thoughts and behaviours that I’ve let traumatise me as far back as I can remember . . Looks forward to the follow up . . Thank you . .again !! 🙏🏼🥰

  • @debbiesmith5513
    @debbiesmith5513 4 роки тому +3

    I have done this repeatedly in my life. I am changing this behavior. Thank you for the insight.

  • @JessikaSweden
    @JessikaSweden 4 роки тому +7

    Absolutely great video! One of the best, and well needed, thank you! 🙏

  • @mirelladlima5278
    @mirelladlima5278 3 роки тому +1

    yes we internalised the CCJ and now we have to rewrite our script. Yes the bow the golden thread the root of the problem that has to come up and has to be sorted out for good. Very helpful content. Tks 🙏

  • @chrissimpson3762
    @chrissimpson3762 4 роки тому +6

    This session is such a revelation. It explains so much about the ongoing heart wrenching nature of what is limiting the love and flow of my life. Struggling not to feel being a victim. Very much looking forward to your next video. Blessings to you both.

    • @WuWeiWisdom
      @WuWeiWisdom  4 роки тому

      Thank you Chris - sending love x

    • @chrissimpson3762
      @chrissimpson3762 4 роки тому

      Feeling more positive now. Recognising that I am blessed with what I am fortunate to be gifted with.

  • @davidbrownguitarvocalist4582
    @davidbrownguitarvocalist4582 4 місяці тому

    This is absolute gold, it’s hit the nail on the head squarely and completely

    • @WuWeiWisdom
      @WuWeiWisdom  4 місяці тому

      Hi David,
      Thank you so much for your wonderful feedback! I’m glad the teaching resonated so deeply with you. It's great to hear that it aligned so well with what you needed at this moment. 😊
      Kind Regards,
      David

  • @judithwallace2091
    @judithwallace2091 4 роки тому +9

    You can call it "fish and chips". 🤣🤣🤣Best laugh of the week.

  • @יסכהברדרומא
    @יסכהברדרומא Рік тому +1

    Thank you❤It was so so important.

    • @WuWeiWisdom
      @WuWeiWisdom  Рік тому +1

      Glad it was helpful! Thank you for taking the time and trouble to watch and comment on our videos and work; we appreciate your interest. Why don't you consider joining our FREE Wu Wei Wisdom Community Facebook support group - we answer questions and offer guidance and teachings to our members here: facebook.com/groups/wuweiwisdomcommunity/. Please check out our next LIVE online event. More details here: bit.ly/GTP-Live-Dec-2023. Kind regards, David.

  • @deeagirdici-maher2483
    @deeagirdici-maher2483 4 роки тому +2

    Thanks for the reminder abt what love is. That was the best video I ever saw for me but with so many changes going on I needed that reminder. Now I see what I was expecting from another. Thank you. ❤

    • @WuWeiWisdom
      @WuWeiWisdom  4 роки тому

      Glad you enjoyed the video Dee! x

  • @tawnyamyers6366
    @tawnyamyers6366 3 роки тому +1

    I love that you teach that love is something you create. Light bulb💡! Why is it stated that we don't choose who we love???

  • @silvercrypto4284
    @silvercrypto4284 4 роки тому +4

    You 2 are amazing thank you so much ❤

    • @WuWeiWisdom
      @WuWeiWisdom  4 роки тому

      Thank you Silver! We appreciate you :)
      You can learn more about how we can help you here: www.wuweiwisdom.com/welcome/ x

  • @esmeeruis4871
    @esmeeruis4871 4 роки тому +2

    Wow... I thought I was the only one, self-sabotaging. You explained exact how my mind is thinking. It is a relief that there are more people doing this. But it is frustrating. How do I stop this?
    I always blame myself afterwards for ruining relationships. Because I always see them very badly in the end

    • @WuWeiWisdom
      @WuWeiWisdom  3 роки тому

      Hi Esmee Ruis, thanks for watching! We appreciate your support. You may find our Love and Relationships Video Playlist helpful: ua-cam.com/play/PL9NQ_PWX4zID3yxrdCbbZFuKHCwgV6qhX.html Alex + David x

    • @WuWeiWisdom
      @WuWeiWisdom  3 роки тому

      p.s. You are also welcome to join our free 'Wu Wei Wisdom Community' Facebook support group here: facebook.com/groups/wuweiwisdomcommunity ...And you can follow us on Instagram: @wuweiwisdom ~ x ~

  • @user-uk1wv8px8q
    @user-uk1wv8px8q 3 роки тому +2

    Thank you for all your amazing content and teachings! I’d love if you could touch on the topic of how to address chronic “shoulda coulda woulda” syndrome (both in relationships and other areas of life)

    • @WuWeiWisdom
      @WuWeiWisdom  Рік тому

      Great suggestion! Kind regards, David.

  • @andreabrunkow9314
    @andreabrunkow9314 2 роки тому +1

    This makes it impossible for your partner to be able to communicate fully with you. It keeps them walking on eggshells and putting their own needs away inorder to keep the peace with you. We get worn out, frustrated and eventually disgusted. All we want from you is to do your inner work and behave appropriately.

  • @ba1354
    @ba1354 4 роки тому

    I’ve been watching all the videos soo happy I found this channel. I am changing my beliefs. Questioning why I think the way I do. It seem soo simple but it’s soo true. Im starting to love my inner child and myself.

  • @judithwallace2091
    @judithwallace2091 4 роки тому +1

    Welcome back! Your videos are the best! 😷👍

  • @raghadam4148
    @raghadam4148 3 роки тому +1

    Amazing explanation

  • @mirelladlima5278
    @mirelladlima5278 3 роки тому

    Sometimes it's strong negative programming but you are right David one has to take ownership for their words, their emotions and that comes with meditation. We increase conscious and decrease automatic subconscious.🙏We need to realise every action of ours has a consequence. That comes with emotional maturity.
    Also every human being to improve has to be humble and accept the past and be willing to do the work to change for the better. Also sometimes we don't verbalise our emotions in a way that the other person knows exactly what we are feeling or experiencing and what we expect from our partner. We fly off the handle and then regret the way we came across. Tks 🙏

  • @catherinethayil4813
    @catherinethayil4813 4 роки тому

    These are exactly the things that i needed to hear. Thank you for helping us.

    • @WuWeiWisdom
      @WuWeiWisdom  Рік тому

      Glad it was helpful! Kind regards, David.

  • @deniseharding5209
    @deniseharding5209 2 роки тому +1

    I have fallen in love with à good man who I felt to be my soulf mate..and yet I still found myself pushing him away.. Bu behaviour just cganged and my feelings Turner negative...felt unable to not do it ..and then regretted it ..Then je came back into my life and I promised not to redo it and still I did !! Such a scary feeling..

  • @irmakipek2450
    @irmakipek2450 4 роки тому +1

    The Fountainhead! love you guys

  • @levaughnmcpherson4052
    @levaughnmcpherson4052 2 роки тому +1

    Powerful

  • @martakupis2323
    @martakupis2323 4 роки тому +1

    Dear David and Alex , this is very helpful. Self sabotage topic awakes another one that I would humbly want to open. Some time ago I was learning about attachment styles. Avoidant and anxious. Seems like in my relationship I was the anxious one and my partner the avoidant. Can You make video about this in the future? I would like to know more about avoiding behaviors:)

    • @WuWeiWisdom
      @WuWeiWisdom  Рік тому

      Thanks for sharing! Kind regards, David.

  • @k-lysbliss8875
    @k-lysbliss8875 4 роки тому +3

    What is the difference between Red Light feelings/Trauma responses and intuition/gut feeling?

    • @WuWeiWisdom
      @WuWeiWisdom  4 роки тому +1

      Hi thanks for watching! This video may help explain: ua-cam.com/video/48KB46G_F6Y/v-deo.html We also have a full playlist on Shen/the spiritual self: ua-cam.com/play/PL9NQ_PWX4zIBmp50wYcmU7jCBLp1Qvl-j.html

    • @k-lysbliss8875
      @k-lysbliss8875 4 роки тому

      @@WuWeiWisdom Excellent, thank you for the links! Looking forward to next week's video! Much Love from England! ♥️

  • @awinther7189
    @awinther7189 3 роки тому

    So informative, Thank you. What is the following video called?

  • @infinity-vv4yj
    @infinity-vv4yj 4 місяці тому +1

    David and Alex!!
    Your videos are amazing!
    I allways get a little question in my head,not so important, however i want to ask
    Why dont call CCJ, CJ OR CC, because what is the difference between critisizing and judging?
    Also, super congrats with 100 000 subscribers!!❤❤❤

    • @WuWeiWisdom
      @WuWeiWisdom  4 місяці тому +1

      Hi! Thank you for your kind words and for supporting our channel! 😊
      We use the term **CCJ - Comparing, Criticizing, and being Judgmental** to highlight how these three behaviors often intertwine, leading to negative self-talk and conflict within ourselves and with others.
      While *criticism* often focuses on specific actions or behaviors, *judgmentmental* goes a step further, forming opinions about someone's value or worth. Using "CCJ" together helps us become aware of when we might be falling into these patterns, so we can choose a more balanced and compassionate response instead.
      Thank you for your support, and we’re thrilled to celebrate 100,000 subscribers with you! ❤
      Kind Regards,
      David
      P.S. Feel free to join our community here: facebook.com/groups/wuweiwisdomcommunity/

  • @sianjones7138
    @sianjones7138 4 роки тому +1

    Hi love the video thank you.
    You mention a video that you’ve done and in it you say you mention highering the bar. Which video is that in please xx

    • @WuWeiWisdom
      @WuWeiWisdom  4 роки тому

      Hi Sian
      I think this is the other video where we talk about ‘highering the bar’: ua-cam.com/video/8xOmnlLZ08I/v-deo.html
      This video is also relevant - it talks about seeking perfection in life: ua-cam.com/video/4XTNdA4hsxQ/v-deo.html
      x

  • @nadjavale9230
    @nadjavale9230 Рік тому +1

    I totally agree wit;h your analysis of self-sabotage. There is, however, a difference between recognizing these patterns as lies and freeing ourselves from them. Are you suggesting that repetition will do the job?

    • @WuWeiWisdom
      @WuWeiWisdom  Рік тому

      Hello Nadja. Thank you for taking the time and trouble to watch and comment on our videos and work; we appreciate your interest and support. Accountability will do the job. Why don't you consider joining our FREE and private Wu Wei Wisdom Community Facebook support group - Over 7,500 members discuss WWW teachings, answer questions and share experiences: facebook.com/groups/wuweiwisdomcommunity/. Kind regards, David.

  • @clairejewell6576
    @clairejewell6576 4 роки тому +1

    Thank you for your video. I am in need of this. I have "chosen" narcs as partners in the past and am still recovering the pain. Now I just feel stuck in the "I am unlove-able mode" because of the evidence and just can't get my "adult me" to accept there is no evidence. Frustrating.

    • @WuWeiWisdom
      @WuWeiWisdom  Рік тому

      You are so welcome. Kind regards, David.

  • @kathysmartt4742
    @kathysmartt4742 4 роки тому +1

    Another good video! I've had this problem all my life which led to 2 divorces and 20 years of being afraid of another failed relationship. Thanks to your videos, I'm working very hard with my inner child to understand my feelings of being unworthy and not good enough for love. As I feel my heart opening up, I'm trying to live in the present and not worry so much about, or try to control, the future. I have found someone who makes me happy just being together, but I see him self-sabotaging the relationship, pushing me away with one hand but obviously wanting so much to pull me in with the other. I know only he can change his underlying beliefs about himself, but is there anything I can do to help him or should I just leave it alone for him to work out on his own?

    • @WuWeiWisdom
      @WuWeiWisdom  4 роки тому +2

      Thank you for sharing Kathy. You cannot change other people - only inspire them through your own actions. Perhaps you could suggest that your partner watch some of our videos and then open up a 'neutral' non-judgmental discussion with him on some of the video topics? x

  • @JessikaSweden
    @JessikaSweden 4 роки тому +2

    I guess that if you don't love yourself, and don't think you are even worth it, you won't believe someone else does. And then you percieve their love for you, and expression of it, as a lie and start to look for evidence, even create them if necessary. You know it's true. You know you are unloveable. So there is evidence, just have to find them. Or at least that their love is conditional, so you can't be yourself. Can't take the mask off, can't be yourself. Sad story, and it's mine. Was. Recovering from beeing unloveable 🙏💖

  • @brokeheartwolf3733
    @brokeheartwolf3733 4 роки тому +1

    Abandoned too many times. No trust but “Yi” or Righteousness remains so sabotage remains.
    If you know story of Chinese Hero Kwan Kung. That’s why.🙏🏻☯️

  • @GeoffDykes
    @GeoffDykes 4 роки тому

    Love your work guys albeit it is evident that there's a huge imbalance in your audience and that possibly explains that the male brain is differently wired. Maybe I am an exception but in the context of this video I'm on a merry go round (despair alternating with momentary bliss) with the sole pertinent lie being difficulty coping with another whose self talk is constantly being externalised (wish it was a simple as the proverbial nagging wife). I have a real CCJ which is easier to live with than the emotional ones. I think the problem lies with my strong bond with my 'fish & chips' lol

  • @aliyaaliya3866
    @aliyaaliya3866 4 роки тому

    You will never believe me but i wanted to get University degree and get job in UK USA or Australia

    • @aliyaaliya3866
      @aliyaaliya3866 4 роки тому +1

      my family put a lot of effort in my education and upbringing but in the company i worked they decided that i should for free without money make their son look something similar to me so he get a life and they didnt pay me a single buk for my work its impossinble im not ur diper, please return my my money

    • @aliyaaliya3866
      @aliyaaliya3866 4 роки тому +1

      he came in my life with shitty towel, good job should be paid off

    • @aliyaaliya3866
      @aliyaaliya3866 4 роки тому

      they guy couldnt even wipe his own ass

    • @himanitomer3
      @himanitomer3 3 роки тому +1

      @@aliyaaliya3866 are you ok babe.?