The Zelda speedrun where you sleep with Paya as fast as possible
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- Опубліковано 30 лип 2020
- Alternate title: How many innuendos can you fit into a single video?
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Tanner Ant
PO Box 283 Prince George A
Prince George, BC
V2L4S2 - Ігри
SORRY THIS TOOK SO LONG TO COME OUT
It's a stream from like 3 months ago I just forgot the stream happened lmao
Still a good video
The person above me is named rodrigo
All good cause the content is great
Nah, it’s fiiiiiiiiiine, as long it was uploaded, you should be glad you were even able to create this video
@@flyingchicken6720 correct
imagine having a 100 year old slumber and you're such a chad that you get laid the first hour youre awake
CHAD
Ultimate Chad move, so Chad that if requested link crossdresses
Lmfao
He's older than 100, he was asleep for 100 years
@@anonymoushy he never said that link was 100 it was a 100 year old SLEEP
"Link, I've watched over your entire journey..."
*O H N O*
@@GGMU_RIPCITY Wait is 6 feet the width?!
@@sentient5 8's the length
........ run
"Link she could be your granddaughter and you know that"
What the actual fuck
Ya see you know that they didn't sleep because
Link's health didn't change
Tbh getting laid should get you extra health, he literally stayed up all night
That's cause he stayed up all night staring at the door waiting for something spooky to show up
ur a friggin genius
I don't know if this is funny or should go in cursed comments.
@@andryuu_2000 Or it spends stamina because of the physical effort lol
0:17
"we need to finish as fast as we can..."
...
*realization*
"..in this run"
Nah it was intentional
He said "rock solid" like 5 times in a row, he _knows_
Oh, he most certainly knows.
"Get laid percent irl is super hard"
"Eh, depends on your rng"
Best line ive heard
That's the one irl category i don't want to try. Too much rng related shenanigans
I'm on record pace for die perc-
@@someguy764 my friend finished this speedrun in 10 years
@@FrakessAnim damn, has he decided to stay with the run or has he started more attempts?
@@someguy764 idk
This speed run is literally when she says her parents aren’t home
Oh yeah
LMAO
r/beatmetoit
Except her parent literally watched them
Impa literally asks Link to stay with her
Zelda: Link, i watched over your entire journey.
Link: **And it was at that moment that he knew, he f*cked up.**
Now I'm just imagining Link narrating his entire adventure to himself as he goes
this is the 3rd of this comment ive seen, be original
He laid the same woman 100 times
literally.
@@ninjawafflezz5356He does in the original Japanese
Zelda: "I've watched over your entire journey"
Link: OK, which way is the shrine of ressurection
Surely you meant “the Shrine or Erection”?
RESSURECTION
BY
ERECTION!!!
The “Kan I Nut” shrine is so perfect for this
Ha giggity
Y cuz linkz nutz
and the owo time shrine
Wat? Dis real?
Nope now’s the time
So irresponsible... You shouldve used daruks protection
Omg i’m dying 😂💀
DUDE
i dont get it :/
LMAOOOOOOOO
@@poodrofartman2802 Your too young ig
Actually this run makes sense. During sleep, the body synthesizes and secretes testosterone at a very high rate. Testosterone increases your libido (sex drive). Link was sleeping for 100 years and was secreting all that testosterone the whole time, so of course he tries to get laid immediately
My man has the biggest brain of all time!
he is hornier than every living being combined
testosterone also increases when you work out , going to the gym makes you hornier lol.
@@shukrantpatil
Thats strange I recently started going to the gym but I feel like my libido hasn't changed since before or after I started working out.
But then again I'm female so maybe it works differently?
🗿
Zelda: Gets link to be a knight
Mipha: Gets him to wear handmade armour
Paya: *Gets him laid*
Now we know who the true heroine is
Link has three girls falling for him. That’s actually insane
It seems someone hasn't played ocarina of time
@@karsbrume9516 *It is I princess Roto of the Zora*
@@JugularJohn you haven’t counted nearly 90% of people who play botw
@@JugularJohnlink has been a harem protag since forever lmao
"She calls him Master Link now" LOL
"I'm glad grandmother is safe, but I still feel so...violated"
Poor choice of words Paya
Yes sir
Yo
Oh master link!
End me now please
"Someone with an evil intent came to this sacred place." --Paya
link:
I see 69 likes so ima keep it there...
Nice
a beautiful 69 likes for no apparent reason
Lmao
There is no 69 likes anymore :(
So hard to type with one hand when holding the Bible in the other
Thank god I have my trusty dog with me
@Neyo 8826 the book's real tho, the contents are a diferent story.
What is the colour of said Bible?
@Neyo 8826 I can’t tell what you mean by that
Is the book itself not real or the contents of the book
“So hard...” hmmmmmmm?
How did he not read the greatest twitch comment in the whole vid “we bounce that paya”
Omg 😂
ow did i miss that? thats amazing
"I'm glad grandmother is safe, but I still feel so...violated"
Poor choice of words Paya
Lmao
don't know whether it's a duty or a sin to have made this 666 likes
@@mikudayoooooo you Did Well Soldier
At what point she says that
VERY poor choice of words.
Imagine you sleep with someone and they say “Thats a huge PB” after.
i'd think they were either 1) going insane, or 2) you know what
Bringing new meaning to "gold split".
Pb?
@@coffeech.1838 personal best
Haha I'd think that's a record for how fast they finished or how long they lasted lol
"how long" "you cant ask me that only paya knows that" THAT KILLED ME DUDE
Paya, after the 702nd attempt of the speedrun: please, do not come. Do not come.
Link: *I'M GONNA COME*
"Babe, my parents will be home in an hour"
Ant: *"Not a problem"*
:)
Np babe I'llne done in 2 minutes
"Just need to buy a bomb real quick"
He just needs to do a BTB 😂😂😂
40 minutes. Thats all I need.
get laid % is my favourite joke speedrun ever. i love imagining that link is canonically doing all of these speedrun strats to break reality itself and nail paya as quickly as possible.
But it still takes longer to get laid than to save the world.
In whatever alternate universe it's canon, I imagine that before Impa placed Link in the Shrine of Resurrection, she confessed (thinking he was unconscious) that she'd always wanted to bang him.
So naturally the first thing Link does after awaking is race straight to Kakariko to take her up on it.
He sees her, realizes in horror she's 100 years older... then sees Paya and thinks, "Ok, she'll do."
same
@@SomeUA-camTraveler i mean. impa looked like paya a 100 years ago.
@@SomeUA-camTraveler GOD, your comment is so cursed.
“Can we get some audible smallgasm?”
**One of the most on point moans I’ve ever heard**
“What like that?”
“Absolutely not”
ANT WTF DON’T PLAY US CHAT LIKE THAT
13:51 if anyone wants the time stamp
"Someone with evil intent came into this place."
"I'm glad Grandmother is safe, but I still feel so... violated."
I dunno how you did this run so fast. I'm doing a Get Laid speedrun right now and my current time into the run is 18 years, 10 months, 8 days, 14 hours, and 11 minutes.
Now its even more
Damn you really counted since birth lol
F
That time isn't bad. If you finish the run before 18 years you might run into a game breaking glitch that gets the npc removed from the map for several years of playtime.
@@cheeeeezewizzz lmao
Nailed the plateu
Nailed the shrines
Nailed the quest
Nailed Paya
You sus
im scared to like this
😳
420th like at 6:09 AM
Nailed the like button
“No we’re not sleeping with Purah”
you don’t want to, but then you play totk an-
Coming back to this video after TOTK released... Purah is definitely not in a 10 year old's body anymore, let's just say that
I choked when I heard “I’m doing whatever I can to get head-get ahead”
“You guys are putting words in my mouth, don’t put things in my mouth”
I laughed at, "I choked".
@@avatargrafiki you better swallow that laughter
@@pikachufanz4744 nothing to swallow. Didn't really laugh. Just wanted to be funny. Lol.
@@avatargrafiki I was making a joke there as well. "swallow"
@@pikachufanz4744 yeah I know. Ignore me. Lol.
Best speed run category hands down
Eaaasily the best
Or you know the paya’s Hand might not be down if you get what I’m saying
I dont know the mario nipple speedrun is also pretty good.
yo he didn't credit ScottFalco for making it here
more like hands up
It would’ve been really funny if Nintendo made it so your stamina is empty after you spend the night with Paya
They do have you do the exhausted animation after the… encounter… with the fairies
@@Jerry_FIts because he was holding his breath, right? Right?…
I’m surprised he never said- “Paya, I’m coming!”
"If your crush was put in a 10 year old's body, you're gonna go to jail" Thanks for the life advice man.
Yeah. But fate finds a way to make me happy....
@@mranxiety9995 stay back, satan
What if you also make yourself 10
@@badrecords-6476 then the police go to jail for watching
Shit I should have heard this earlier
"I need to have sleep with Paya as fast as possible."
Well, then, I guess this is also a no stamima upgrade challenge.
Paya: "You're already tired out? Wait-"
Link: _stuffing his face with food_ *"Not anymore."*
Well according to the game chronology, it was a 1 full night
@@TextualDeviant LOL-
@@TextualDeviant My eyes.
@@yunarukami14What about them- your big, beautiful eyes 👀 that is?
13:51 THIS IS A CURSED VIDEO
15:32 This is really killing it, I almost woke up everyone in the house laughing
Link: *wakes up with amnesia
Also link: I don’t know why I am here, all I know is that I must f***
*laughs in wheeze*
@@WeeGail6 *wheezes in laugh*
Life in a nutshell according to science
Hey, you’d be pretty horny and desperate for some lovin’ if you haven’t had any in 100 years...
@joshua spriggs Ah come on, can't you let us immature gamers have some fun?
"Get laid percent IRL is super hard."
"Eh, it depends on your rng."
Well, I mean microtransactions help too.
Sometimes you can get it sub 7 years!
You mean pay to win?
Jodi Joji wtf 🤣🤣
simp
@@qinntsuki2485 even if i paid i wouldnt win
No, for Paya’s sake, please don’t finish as quickly as possible.
Ant not wanting Purah aged well...
Paya: L-link. I'm shy, go slow.
Link: HYAAA. GYAH. HAAAAA
No
Well the master sword is big😏
No no
@@shxhebx2039 stop
You forgot hah, heh, hoooaaa!!!!!
12:07
Chat: Get laid% is hard in real life
Ant: Depends on your rng
Ah, explains my situation then!
Crappy RNG :(
But ill take what i can get and make it work eventually :)
@@derpsquad3306 Wait, what
@@Liam-fd4uh he has bad RNG, basically can't get laid
@@stpidstuff Correct
But even with bad RNG, something good is bound to happen at *some* point!
Thank you for the time.
"First things first let's go through this wall"
I'm saving for this and using it in something, mark my words.
PURAH GET LAID% IS POSSIBLE NOW YEAHHHHHHHHH
How… For Educational Purposes
@@jooobjoob I, for one, believe this to be useful information. I believe it could be quite beneficial to many people.
"Optimise the laying process, and I'm not talking about the cuccos."
who ruined the 69
@@turtz4life432 its 420 for me now
Who ruined the 690
Its at 769 and i wanna like it so bad
Zelda: let's see what links doing
Paya: I'm glad you stayed by my side all-day
Zelda: Dear god
Imagine doing this questline after beating Vah Ruta.
@@S.I.L. Zelda and Mipha:
>~
@@S.I.L. thats even worse,there should be a speedrun like taht
There's more
@@S.I.L.
Mipha watches jelously
Revali is disturbed
The other 2 are just confused
The getting laid by pura jokes are even funnier now that tears of the kingdom is out.
My favorite part about this video is honestly your moms comments. So supportive on your quest to get laid and finish first.
if we assume that he gets to sleep with zelda once he defeats ganon, then defeating ganon is actually a faster way to get laid
I read it as
He sleeps with ganon
@@microwave8931 who wouldn't
@@sleepy_llt3307 apparently Zelda
I-
@@sleepy_llt3307 well it depends. Which form are we talking about? Dad bod wind waker, buff daddy from twilight, or whatever kind of hentai fantasy calamity ganon is? Aw hell, who am i kidding, of course we’d sleep with ALL of those forma.
I was reading the chat and saw "simp%" and couldn't stop laughing for like 20 minutes
*NICE*
Shoutouts to the one guy in chat saying beast***ty%
@@mercuryrising9758 XD
It ain't simpin' if you pound it.
Isn't Simp% just immediately going to fight Ganon?
If only Ant saw Purah now
“do you have any protection” “DARUKS PROTECTION IS READY!”
There should be a "tantric speed run"
Which is this, but you also have to do enough shrines to get max stamina before spending the night w/ Paya.
What..?
Like.
that would suck
@@cyb3rl0v333 how do you not get it
Oh
Oh no
“He is a man of focus, commitment, and sheer f*king will...”
Good one
"Sheer fucking will"
Literally
Sheer.
Fucking will.
@@tamoozbr and @Pyryte i was gonna make that joke :(
Sheer fucking paya
(4:45) homie spoke two years too soon😔
"Purah is a little girl"
"She's 100 yrs old"
"It's still bad"
"You're also 100 yrs old"
LMFSAOODFK9EOEK2W
Age doesn't matter for drawings
@@ZBJDMLife oh hell nah bro
@@ferxanik All drawing are minors then.... If its something being just drawn... it is aging by seconds after its creation. idk I'm high asf
7:54 - "Someone with evil intent came into this sacred place."
That's what she said.
Well, here’s some magic powder. Clean yourself up.
Paya: “Come over”
Link: “I can’t, I have to beat Ganon and save all of Hyrule”
Paya: “my parents aren’t home”
Link:
7:40
Personally, I find it dreamy when men use literal explosives to launch themselves to my house with the explosive force. They do smell a bit charred, and usually are missing a limb or two...
Oh my god he can mend his severed limbs just by eating a few apples he’s PERFECT!!
My dude, this is the first video of yours I've ever seen. You have SUCH good screen presence, your voice is very pleasing to listen to and your jokes are funny without being raunchy, even in the face of a speedy run with THIS type of goal. You've got a great balance of game-skill with streaming performance, you earned this sub with just the first 5 mins. Keep up the good work!
Future Mrs. Ant: "whew! that was great!"
Tanner: "Okay, so there's a few easy things to fix; and I can change some strategies and techniques to finish a little bit faster..."
@Eric Lee his surname is legit Ant tho lmao
“That was quick”
"sub 1 minute let's goo"
HOLYYY I READ THIS COMMENT AS HE SAID THOSE WORDS
I think this comment is the winner out of the whole comment section. 😂
"We gonna get real hard and finish fast" that got me crying 😂😂😂
13:27 that camera angle.... oh no
Accurate representation of what’s about to happen to be honest.
That moment when Link talked to a door, then tried to talk to Impa, then burst through the door t-posing was priceless
Time?
Igor Juszczak 14:00
"What is that, Mahogany? That's a sturdy wood right there."
He didn't actually t-pose. He opened the door normally as he always does.
@@joblessmf420 🤓
"We gotta go really hard and finish as fast as we can."
Oh, Paya, sweetie, I'm so sorry...
4:45 its funny after totk he would 100% take back that comment about purah
17:27 "Man I'm feeling good today, I don't know what it is but... these let's get laid speedruns... they feel good!"
I had to make a clip out of that. I wish I could use it more often HAHAHA.
Imagine Zelda Watching Link
He Just Went Faster Than Anyone Ever To Get Laid By A Girl He Doesnt Know, Then Goes And Stops Existing Right After
*zeus be like*
@@skibbledebabble1853 you couldn't make a better joke there
@@JoJoboiWav nope
@@skibbledebabble1853 Best joke ever
Why Do You Take Time To Write Like This When Its Really Fucking Weird And Makes You Look Like A Massive Tool
“I guess you actually have to talk with people to spend the night with them”
what have you been doing all this time smallant. What have you done 😳
he finds a dead body and moves on
He tells them he's a streamer and that is all that is required
@@galaxycollision3887 r/cursedcomments
SmallHooker1
@@expomarker7868 genius
"thats just prostitution with some democracy involved" bruh im dying
i did this a few days ago and just before i was gonna talk i had to remember the most import ant detail: no "armor" whatsoever
14:56 that wasnt the only thing that overflowed that day
Can’t wait till the speed run community goes full meme and starts doing “Get laid% in real life”
There already the pick up artist community. Unfortunately is their attitude a bit off.
Hopefully the speed running community could bring some virtue in process.
Depending on how you define it, you could start the speedrun and then just lay your significant other. So it would be easily cheesable
Any% would be brutal, with police and fbi involved.
This got very dark very quickly
Outside speedrun Get laid%
6:17 "who is this beautiful young creature- not you" that's gonna change in TOTK
“That was pretty tight!” Nice.
I can just imagine link in this challenge and he's thinking "I don't know who I am or why I'm here all I know is that I must screw"
Right?! This dude doesn't even know his name when he wakes up, all he knows is that he has to bend time and space and travel like 5 km, fix everyone's problems in an *entire village*, and bone down in this 120 year old lady's house with some girl he literally met like, 20 minutes before that point. This is what happens when you finally realize your purpose in life I guess
Alternate title: “Link’s testosterone has been building for 100 damn year!”
Holy sweet Jesus... from all the othee comments, you're the BEST ONE.
Yeah, this one’s good
Kaiwala into paya
Small Ant: Purah’s in a 10 year old’s body
Every 10 year old: We’re not THAT small are we?
0:28 smallant canonically finishes early
Now everyone will wonder why the hell this stupid comment is STILL GETTING REPLIES A YEAR LATER. (it's adorable how upset guys get if you call Link anything but a straight bro)
Shows how desperate these comments are for human interactions lol. Alot of virgins in this one lol.
@@katseyegem5478 to be fair link isn't the type of guy to get laid with anyone that isn't zelda
@@katseyegem5478 I don't understand how your comment relates to anything but I'm guessing you want an ego boost.
To be fair its a kids game with mild themes and nowhere does link "get laid" it shows how ppl like the poster and these comments from these immature kids/ adults ruin something others enjoy thats all lol.
@@katseyegem5478 dude this is in no way a kid's game tbh. I just find the speedrun hilarious and take into account Link's entire character, he takes things far too literal. That's what makes this funny. Really, Link's more of an asexual icon.
NEVER have I heard such beauty as “Democratic Prostitution“
ikr
Lmao
Also known as politics
Also known as a gangrape
agreed
"The run ends when you finish"
LMAO
“Link has to finish as fast as he can” Best quote ever
When you get so good at dating women that you start speed running them
craigslist
That’s actually pretty similar to the plot of the manga _The World God Only Knows_ .
I feel bad for the children asking their parents what get laid means.
But what does it mean? Explain please
@@TimurSokol dude, I hope you're joking
@@ubern00bkye I don't know what that means either, but i'm not from the USA so meh
@@Blosteroid I'm not from the USA either
@@ubern00bkye Ok, so?
Well this is a nice introduction to smallant
"goes to his true love.... paya.
"If your crush is put in a ten year old's body, your going to jail."
Kafei and Anju would like a word
Dont worry, they knew what they were doing was wrong. Thats why they were fine with capital punishment by moon
@@mr.potato Well now I know what game this is from
Who?
@@intensellylit4100 Kafei and Anju are from Majora's Mask, they were engaged and Kafei was turned into a child.
@@johnherb4243 thanks
What happened to SmallAnt1, this “SmallAnt” guy is kind of weird
Who is small ant 1???
Who is smallant?
Which ant is small??
@Eric Lee smallant is pretty big for his kind tho
what ant small ant 1 is whas small?
"We nees to finish as fast as we can." THIS IS MY TYPE OF SPEED RUN
Bro predicted Purah mania 2 years before it starts. :)
This was inevitable.
My furry alarm is going crazy. You know anything about this?
@@jacksonb8123 ewww cringe furry 🤢
16:20 _The _*_perspective_*_ and the _*_poses_*
I can't... XD It's too perfect!
Right in front of grandma
Her grandmother doesnt care, because she is proud and loves link's log as well
The one video I never knew I needed but I still got and liked
I can’t wait for these to start getting faster than Any% runs.
Paya: Come to my house
Link: No I’m in a 100 year coma
Paya: My parents are dead
Link:
Edit: Plz subscribe I need friends
Sir, with respect, shoo.
What are you doing here? This isn't JoJo
Harry Laundon Is he not allowed to comment on non jojo vids lol
Kaiwala Daga Kotowaru
"how long?"
"9 inches, 10 if I push it"
This is an "are ya winning son" moment.
We're going to comfort her...
Paya: Yey!
As fast as we can...
Paya: boooo