The problem is, many people are good at hiding their true selves, even against their own family. These people just need some push to reveal their true nature.
He lost her to the cu*ts that she works with. It was they who were encouraging her to do this. Not a single one of them was happy in their own relationship and they didn't think twice about convincing her to destroy hers.
I can only image how tough it must have been for OP as well when his wife got diagnosed and treatment. Yet she chose to be selfish. How’s cheating on your partner of 20 years equals to “living life to the fullest”?
"Living life to the fullest" is often code for doing whatever you want and pretending that there are no consequences. Just like the wife here was surprised that her actions had consequences.
She could have done some crazy stuff with her husband, lived life to the fullest with her husband, fallen more deeply in love with her husband after getting a new outlook on life. Nah, she decided to cheat. Tells you what kind of person she was/became.
So she is probably already in an emotional affair, wants permission to cheat and tries to gaslight/shame language him along with a not so subtle hint that he will pay a price if he doesn’t lay down and accept it. Yeah, she sounds like a real gem. The whole toxic masculinity/insecure thing would have done it for me. Yeah, don’t worry about that I can 100% guarantee you will not be exposed to that ever again.
There is never a "one time pass" - it is just a first time pass. Her level of disrespect toward you was amazing. It is incredible that the object of her infidelity was a fat, bald loser. Good on you for moving along with your life.
The way she cheated & her excuses & then refusal to accept the reality of an impending divorce afterwards shows a level of contempt for her husband that is quite extraordinary - he should never speak to her again…
If this comment is seen by a single person, and makes the slightest difference in a single relationship, it will be worth saying this. People, when you cheat, offering your partner to cheat back, or offering them a 3-some, it isn't a quick fix, at least from my point of view. having been in this position, I didn't want to sleep with anyone else, or have a 3-some. I wanted something that my then wife was no longer able to give me no matter how hard she tried, her unwavering loyalty, as I had given to her. I was put in a position like this, told what was going to happen beforehand, and told I had no choice, but I did have a choice, to leave, and I did. If you crave someone else, then break up, or divorce, and THEN go do it, otherwise you're just a useless gardening tool, male or female, goes both ways. If you want someone else, that's fine, heart wants what the heart wants, but do it the right way.
How was there even a moment where he needed time to think about whether or not you wanted to stay with his wife? There's not even a reasonable justification to try to put yourself in her shoes after making a request like that. If my wife or I were to ask the other if we could have a hall pass for any possible reason while one is still breathing and married to the other, we might as well rephrase that question with the words I want to divorce so I could sleep with other people. Because there's no possible way in hell either of us would see that as an option in our marriage and anyone who does, is either already cheating or planning on cheating whether you give them permission or not. The level of manipulation and gas lighting shown by this woman was clearly a direct result of being influenced by her friends and social media, which should have made it that much more simpler for him to remove her from his life. Women who take advice from their harpy friends instead of trusted and married family members, have a higher propensity to sabotage their marriage.
divorce immediately. she's a cheater and probably never was wife material. You married an illusion, however painful it is. save you from future misery and save this 304 from a "toxic unsecure" uhusband
I am a 2 time cancer survivor. Been with the same person since high school and have been married for 14 years. This is just nuts. It's an excuse she is using. I have a feeling she has been hanging out with the wrong people, and she has changed her viewpoint and expects him to as well. I could never ask my wife for a hall pass after she stuck by me through everything and sacrificed herself.
All spot on, i bet her friends suggested her to go with that approach with him, to gaslight him in having no choice but to accept her affair, good for him to realize he had a choice afterall
The fact this guy even has to ask is why I hate Reddit. Strong men don't even question themselves, they dump their girl the moment the words "insecure," "toxic masculinity," or "fragile male ego" come out of their mouth. And Reddit is 100% on board with people using those terms. Back to SSM.
If you are ever sad that you are unwanted, unloved and single, imagine that you have long term relationship with "love of your life" and then you get backstabbed just because your partner is "bored". Only imagining it feels like living hell.
So let me get this straight: She wants something that will hurt him with a complete disregard for his feelings AND tells him he is insecure and toxic if he doesn't want to get hurt? Wild.
I'm sorry but if my daughter ever told me to get back with a cheater I'll just ask her one question. "Will you change your last name or should i change mine?" Cuz that's not my daughter anymore
Wow, this woman is awful. He didn't want her to cheat so she decided to just do it and "take the decision out of his hands" wtaf, leave her dude. Christ
dude, none of those words describe her. if she were any of those things, she wouldn't be making demands to sleep with other guys while basically telling you to get over it
Yeah nah, for like one brief shining second after birth control pills but before social media, marriage was about love, in one small sliver of demographic, for one small sliver of western cultures. For all other times, locations, and years, it's been transactional.
THEY don't need counseling. SHE does. When asked why she cheated so easily, her response was "because I could". That answer was a huge red fu#king flag...
She does not sound at all like the OP described in the opening of the video. She sounds like a terrible person to attempt a relationship with, I would advise not doing so.
Spoiler alert; her comments reveal that she is in fact *not* the most intelligent, thoughtful, caring and loyal person you know. If you still believe that, then you should stay with her because you deserve each other.
The furthest distance between any two numbers, is 0 and 1. If he would have been fine with it, such a thing will happen again, and again. That said, a lot of the things he'd put kind of convince me as to why she thought thia would go over in her favor.
when will people understand that when your partner asks you to swing, open relationship, hall pass, you already know the answer no one should want to do any of these things in a real marriage. you had your answer when she told you about this stupidty
The way I see it? She can go back to the other guy if he's good enough to screw while she's married. Being married means you stick with the person unless there are circumstances that change things. But the funny thing is if you wanna get with other people? Break it off first. That way it's not cheating and you truly show how much you care about the other person by respecting them and not expecting them to be some safety net. Cancer or not, ask her this. Would she be ok if you used the same excuse while she was still dealing with cancer? Saying how your needs need to be met and she can't meet them? Would she have been perfectly fine back then? If no? Double standards, plain and simple.
The moment my husband asked for a hall pass is the moment our marriage would be over. I would leave him in the middle of cancer treatment or survived a bear attack, i don't give a single fuck. The way he was asking to many questions and begging her to not cheat on him a because she had cancer 🤡🤡🤡🤡
![Lyv - Never Kneel Again [A Baldur's Gate 3/Lae'zel Fan Song]](http://i.ytimg.com/vi/xM0BchE40CY/mqdefault.jpg)
![Lyv - Never Kneel Again [A Baldur's Gate 3/Lae'zel Fan Song]](/img/tr.png)
You say she is the most "thoughtful, caring, loyal person" you know. You need to get to know some more people.
The problem is, many people are good at hiding their true selves, even against their own family. These people just need some push to reveal their true nature.
I am actually worried that OP has never met anyone else, ever.
Hopefully the sex was worth it .
Exactly what I said
That ain't anywhere close to loyalty
If you ever hear "male toxicity" or "insecure" run fast, and get out = divorce or dump
Those are codewords that comes out of a cheaters mouth.
Hell yeah
All her friends husband should know what they did and face the consequences
Calling someone toxic and insecure for not wanting their monogamous partner sleeping around is 100% emotional manipulation
If emotional manipulation had picture in a textbook itd be the first line of this reddit post
You could say he lost is wife to cancer. She wasn't the same person afterwards.
He lost her to the cu*ts that she works with. It was they who were encouraging her to do this. Not a single one of them was happy in their own relationship and they didn't think twice about convincing her to destroy hers.
This is the best comment made on this post.
"Unless she wins the lottery and I find it in my heart to forgive her" 🤣🤣🤣
I can only image how tough it must have been for OP as well when his wife got diagnosed and treatment. Yet she chose to be selfish.
How’s cheating on your partner of 20 years equals to “living life to the fullest”?
"Living life to the fullest" is often code for doing whatever you want and pretending that there are no consequences. Just like the wife here was surprised that her actions had consequences.
Thats how you know that the wife never really loved him, she just settled for him.
She could have done some crazy stuff with her husband, lived life to the fullest with her husband, fallen more deeply in love with her husband after getting a new outlook on life. Nah, she decided to cheat. Tells you what kind of person she was/became.
I didn’t even need to hear the details. You’re not wrong she is! LEAVE HER! Run forest ruuuuuunn!!🏃♂️
So she is probably already in an emotional affair, wants permission to cheat and tries to gaslight/shame language him along with a not so subtle hint that he will pay a price if he doesn’t lay down and accept it. Yeah, she sounds like a real gem. The whole toxic masculinity/insecure thing would have done it for me. Yeah, don’t worry about that I can 100% guarantee you will not be exposed to that ever again.
Bro wasn't Gaslit, bro was GasTorched
Bro wasn't GasTorched, bro was GasBombed
There is never a "one time pass" - it is just a first time pass. Her level of disrespect toward you was amazing. It is incredible that the object of her infidelity was a fat, bald loser. Good on you for moving along with your life.
10:54 Wow the audacity 😪
The way she cheated & her excuses & then refusal to accept the reality of an impending divorce afterwards shows a level of contempt for her husband that is quite extraordinary - he should never speak to her again…
If this comment is seen by a single person, and makes the slightest difference in a single relationship, it will be worth saying this.
People, when you cheat, offering your partner to cheat back, or offering them a 3-some, it isn't a quick fix, at least from my point of view. having been in this position, I didn't want to sleep with anyone else, or have a 3-some. I wanted something that my then wife was no longer able to give me no matter how hard she tried, her unwavering loyalty, as I had given to her. I was put in a position like this, told what was going to happen beforehand, and told I had no choice, but I did have a choice, to leave, and I did.
If you crave someone else, then break up, or divorce, and THEN go do it, otherwise you're just a useless gardening tool, male or female, goes both ways.
If you want someone else, that's fine, heart wants what the heart wants, but do it the right way.
Emotional blackmail. That's an immediate grounds for divorce right there, as it's a fundamental violation of trust for the sake of hedonism.
How was there even a moment where he needed time to think about whether or not you wanted to stay with his wife? There's not even a reasonable justification to try to put yourself in her shoes after making a request like that. If my wife or I were to ask the other if we could have a hall pass for any possible reason while one is still breathing and married to the other, we might as well rephrase that question with the words I want to divorce so I could sleep with other people. Because there's no possible way in hell either of us would see that as an option in our marriage and anyone who does, is either already cheating or planning on cheating whether you give them permission or not. The level of manipulation and gas lighting shown by this woman was clearly a direct result of being influenced by her friends and social media, which should have made it that much more simpler for him to remove her from his life. Women who take advice from their harpy friends instead of trusted and married family members, have a higher propensity to sabotage their marriage.
divorce immediately. she's a cheater and probably never was wife material. You married an illusion, however painful it is. save you from future misery and save this 304 from a "toxic unsecure" uhusband
Someone getting cancer doesn't give that person the right to change the rules of a monogamous relationship.
I am a 2 time cancer survivor. Been with the same person since high school and have been married for 14 years. This is just nuts. It's an excuse she is using. I have a feeling she has been hanging out with the wrong people, and she has changed her viewpoint and expects him to as well. I could never ask my wife for a hall pass after she stuck by me through everything and sacrificed herself.
Goddamn, good on you bro for beating that shit twice! I hope it won't come back for another rematch, you've allready kicked it's ass!
All spot on, i bet her friends suggested her to go with that approach with him, to gaslight him in having no choice but to accept her affair, good for him to realize he had a choice afterall
He took her to expensive, international vacations and now she wants to cheat?
The fact this guy even has to ask is why I hate Reddit. Strong men don't even question themselves, they dump their girl the moment the words "insecure," "toxic masculinity," or "fragile male ego" come out of their mouth. And Reddit is 100% on board with people using those terms.
Back to SSM.
If you are ever sad that you are unwanted, unloved and single, imagine that you have long term relationship with "love of your life" and then you get backstabbed just because your partner is "bored".
Only imagining it feels like living hell.
So let me get this straight: She wants something that will hurt him with a complete disregard for his feelings AND tells him he is insecure and toxic if he doesn't want to get hurt? Wild.
Bruh, how can he even consider that this is okay?
there's no way in hell this would have been a one time thing if he tolerated it.
I am pretty sure she has been already cheating.
She was only too lazy to actually try to hide it anymore.
Say no Divorce is the only answer .
Gaslighting 101
This is common tactic cheater use to manipulate their partner n to guilt trip them
Op just make sure in divorce that you're ex wife has to return to her mating name.
I'm sorry but if my daughter ever told me to get back with a cheater I'll just ask her one question.
"Will you change your last name or should i change mine?"
Cuz that's not my daughter anymore
I thought she promised to be faithful as long as you both lived on your wedding day?
Wow, this woman is awful. He didn't want her to cheat so she decided to just do it and "take the decision out of his hands" wtaf, leave her dude. Christ
Yeah/Nah, get rid of her NOW, engage a lawyer, ghost her and let the lawyer deal with it.
He's the toxic one? That's some low quality gaslighting.
dude, none of those words describe her. if she were any of those things, she wouldn't be making demands to sleep with other guys while basically telling you to get over it
The wife perceived OP as weak. Thats why man need have iron fist in marriage, or will had too deal with this kind kf BS
I swear marriage used to be about love but now it's all about transaction
Once the wedding happens the love dies off
Yeah nah, for like one brief shining second after birth control pills but before social media, marriage was about love, in one small sliver of demographic, for one small sliver of western cultures. For all other times, locations, and years, it's been transactional.
THEY don't need counseling. SHE does. When asked why she cheated so easily, her response was "because I could". That answer was a huge red fu#king flag...
She does not sound at all like the OP described in the opening of the video. She sounds like a terrible person to attempt a relationship with, I would advise not doing so.
I would really like to know what her AP has to say to this. Just out of curiosity... OOP was dealt a crappy hand with her...
Spoiler alert; her comments reveal that she is in fact *not* the most intelligent, thoughtful, caring and loyal person you know. If you still believe that, then you should stay with her because you deserve each other.
Hmm... Wife definitely wanted a divorce from the start. Otherwise, what's the point of telling hubby about the plans?
i guess the cancer really did take his wife...
The furthest distance between any two numbers, is 0 and 1. If he would have been fine with it, such a thing will happen again, and again. That said, a lot of the things he'd put kind of convince me as to why she thought thia would go over in her favor.
It reminds me of the sister that slept with her sisters bf and used the escuse of cancer that she had as a child
Deargod leave her
when will people understand that when your partner asks you to
swing, open relationship, hall pass,
you already know the answer no one should want to do any of these things in a real marriage.
you had your answer when she told you about this stupidty
The way I see it? She can go back to the other guy if he's good enough to screw while she's married. Being married means you stick with the person unless there are circumstances that change things. But the funny thing is if you wanna get with other people? Break it off first. That way it's not cheating and you truly show how much you care about the other person by respecting them and not expecting them to be some safety net. Cancer or not, ask her this. Would she be ok if you used the same excuse while she was still dealing with cancer? Saying how your needs need to be met and she can't meet them? Would she have been perfectly fine back then? If no? Double standards, plain and simple.
Tell your wife to Honor her marriage vow period or face divorce.
Your marriage is over . PERIOD !!!
Nope, dump.
Damn maybe islam has some good ideas
did he just say “short, fat and bald” and proceed to say “All things I couldn’t compete with”? what?? this is all negative things and not positive
He was being sarcastic.
it's good story but it's a recycled one. Third time hearing it.
very true. answer is the same, dump the cheater, expose her and go NC. she can go take her fling for her old days,
All stories here are recycled
The moment my husband asked for a hall pass is the moment our marriage would be over. I would leave him in the middle of cancer treatment or survived a bear attack, i don't give a single fuck. The way he was asking to many questions and begging her to not cheat on him a because she had cancer 🤡🤡🤡🤡
ragebait
When you heard words "male toxicity" that means is time to get a brand new wife. Congratulations.