Thank you for the lovely words. Due to past trauma was scared to read comments but I did and I just cried. All the love. Thank you let's save more children
I loved when Relebogile said that justice will always come around even if you don't get to witness it or hear about it. That is one thing about life, you cannot do something horrible to someone and think you will walk away unscathed. Someway somehow it will get back to you.
Rape is evil. 💔 Tjo. I know and understand why she expected and deserved empathy and support from females. But what struck me as a man, with this case is…really it’s our fault as men. How could we perpetrate such crimes? This killed so many lives (and I’m not even talking the suicides). I have a theory. I might be wrong…but l think one of the small steps we should take as a society is treating our toddlers the same. Little boys must do the same chores as the girls. I think we can begin there. A very small step.
You've raised such a critical point which we're missing as parents in this day and age. Through something as seemingly small as allocating all house chores to girl children, we're making the boy child feel more important than the girl child. The girl child is made to feel they are under and were created to serve the boy child... #FoodForThought
@@thandol448 indeed. There was a time when it was okay for those roles to be entrenched. But we are in new times, with new challenges. But it’s such a long complex road. The next biggest challenge is how do we challenge drugs. I really suspect drugs were involved in this case. I just cannot think how else one can do such an act. Just the thought of them beating her head brings shivers down my spine…it’s just not normal.
Sally is an extraordinary women. What she was trying to explain is that she got Dissociative Identity Disorder, is a mental process which generates lack of connection in the individual thoughts, feelings, memories, actions or sense of identity. This can happen because of various factors, trauma being one of them. It is a coping mechanism, the person literally shuts off or dissociates themselves from a situation or experience that's too violent, traumatic, or painful to assimilate with their conscious self. Sending you love, healing and prosperity.
Thank you for explaining it so well coz I was a bit confused when she said that she disociated from herself but now I understand and it makes sense that it's a coping mechanism and it's seems like dissociation and many other different forms of mental coping mechanisms that are done due to trauma are done unconsciously until you really sit down with urself and think about it or go to therapy.
Thank you for explaining those words. I think there many people going through such kind of situation. We see them around. All we can do is be nice to each other. Be open to others so that they can open up. I hope her mother had learned about the true events of what happened so that she can also council herself. I think her reaction was because she was also traumatized, which does not help the victim in anyway. I also see the challenges the investigating officer are facing when they have a case but only one person can conclude it which in this instance is the victim who was never prepared to stand in court to face the perpetrators.
This was a set up her friend was on this too the should be put in jail as well I'm very this happen to you may God continue to bless you 🙏🏽 your strength
Dear Sally, I hope you read this as I was deeply moved by your story. You are a truly beautiful and incredible woman. I celebrate your courage to finally face and deal with what happened to you, as well as your strength and wisdom to forgive; not for the perpetrators, but for your own peace and freedom which you rightfully deserve. I can honestly believe that you've forgiven all the people who hurt you (perpetrators and "non-supporters" alike). I am happy there are people of purpose such as yourself, who're spring out and also available to help support survivors like you. God bless you and keep you. 🙏
The Principal is my hero, big ups to her. It sad that her mother didn't care much of how she felt and never offered her any support. toxic mothers are a topic for another day. thanks girl for sharing your story. I wouldnt wish this to any female. Hope you heal from this.
“Come back you know where he lives” was the line I got as well. Not being believed only makes the healing journey harder. Listening to this honestly made my story feel heard. Sending love to anyone who currently need it after listening to this.
@@halacele8571 someone said that this same group of men is known there for having raped a girl every weekend. The village knew but no one spoke up. One of the men (the girls boyfriend) tried to justify it to the public as her punishment for cheating on him. Sick people
This is the most painful part about rape victims. There's evidence, but in order for the case to go ahead, you have to face your rapists in court, relive the moment and face all the judgments from society. The system has to change somehow I'm literally breathing heavily watching this episode and seeing how strong this lady is telling her story.
Not to be insensitive but how will they do a case without the person being there? It’s really sad that this it has to be done this way. Rape is really brutal, there’s really no healing from it, think her family needed to be there for her and support her with the case but they didn’t do anything...
@@SAG3__ they could be in a separate room that has a camera so that the court could see her testimony. This is what they do in the case of minors so I think they must do the same for all victims of abuse.
I understand the need for courts to decide based on arguments from both sides but I think the perpetrators and victims should not be directly involved in the court on the day the legal decision is being made. I think instead lawyers should be told the perspectives from both sides before hand separately and then they bring up what they were told in the discussions on the court day without the perpetrators and victims present.
When she said, “it takes a lot to forgive someone who is not sorry”, it hit hard because I have done that so many times and I still wonder if it was the right thing to do, simply because they continue to behave like I am the problem!
Just because you forgive them, doesn't mean you have a duty to keep people that hurt you, emotional or physically in your life. You are in control of who you keep in your life.
She is an absolutely amazing interviewer. I love how she doesn't over talk the person. It seems she ask the right questions and keeps the conversation on point. She also validates her pain, without stopping the flow. Really awesome job. I feel so bad for the woman this happened to. It's just horrible. God bless her soul.
Personally I feel like it was really a jealousy thing. You can tell that she was a “good girl” and it sounds like corrective rape. Like they wanted her to be mediocre like everyone else around. This happens a lot in our communities ☹️
I taught my girls to fight off a rapidt tooth and nail, even when they threaten to kill them. I did not consider being drugged or gang raped, where you have little to no chance of fighting. So I was wrong, I must reteach them to live. I raped 2 x at very young ages, but my mind blocked out the actual thing! But I cry from my core everytime I watch such interviews. I may need help and Im almost 50.
Sorry you went thru all of that. I pray for your healing, your a survivor, warrior, you are the light not darkness, your presence is special in this world. Please go find help and teach your daughters how to keep safe
I'm so proud of Sally's strength, growth and willingness to heal. As horrific as this was, you survived ❤. May God continue to use you as a vessel of light for those who've experienced rape.
As a woman I'm sorry that other females treated you like that, as a mother I hope I do better , as a South African I hate how things haven't improved at all for victims of crimes against women and children😭😭😭
That how Afrucan women and women deal with pain by not acknowledging someone ellses. We women need healing as we are modtly all bictims of some if trauma or another but we need to stand together! A friend was raped by a teacher whon imprenated her she kept the child and loved as it was her child . When she told the daughter it triggered psychosis and she is now so mentally unstable. Unfortunately her mum foed of xancer before the daughters break down
Sally, I am so sorry that someone thought that it was OK for them to put you through that hell. What makes the whole thing so horrendous is that it was a woman who sacrificed you to those animals. I am so happy that you survived and did not end your life because now you are an inspiration to us all. All over the world rape victims find it too traumatic to report rape because the police tend to make a mockery of their ordeal. I am from Eswatini and I have heard horror stories where a woman goes to a police station to report rape and the police officer would ask her “How did it feel?” I think that we need to do more to educate the nurses and police about how to support victims of rape and it should be a sackable offence for anyone in those professions to make a mockery of a rape victim. That is the only way they will understand how serious the issue is. We also need to educate our children more about rape because a lot of it happens at our homes. Kids need to know what their rights are and be confident that if someone violates them then they can report that person. Men who rape know that it’s hard for a woman to prove that rape happened and they are likely to get away with it. I say all rape needs to be reported!!
WHY DO PEOPLE SAY LIKE ANIMALS. IT WASN'T ANIMALS THAT DID THAT EVIL 😈 COWARDLY DIRTY BASTARD'S THING'S IT WAS SO CALLED MAN. BUT I DON'T BELIEVE THEY ARE MEN THEY ARE DEMONS OF SATAN 😡 THEY ARE NOT MEN AND THEY ARE NOT ANIMALS AS THAT'S AN INSULT TO MOTHER NATURES GODLY ANIMALS. IT WAS EVILLLLLLL, COWARDLY DIRTY LOWLIFES THAT DID THAT TO THAT BEAUTIFUL GIRL.
You get used to it your emotions kind of disappear my emotions haven’t they come and go and I take my sexual assaults and make them into jokes to cope I still have triggers as well
I also think like that, she also didn't know how to deal with it.Being a nurse doesn't mean you know or can deal with everything.She also could have gone for counselling as well.
When women say to another woman "where were you going". "what were you wearing" as a woman you think a woman getting raped is her fault... That is sooo painful we don't need men to say it's our fault coz we telling each other that it's disgusting A mother askin you that and then acting like they don't know why your relationship is messed up... At 10 I was asked the same thing when a cousin tried to assault me I k Ow its not the same as it actually happening but If it had happened only my dad would have done something about it coz my mum Mos Def made it clear it was my fault that I was hanging around my cousins
Our ignorance & lack of knowledge in our thinking as women is so clear now through the kind of comments we make when a fellow woman goes through such. We don't see it as an attack on womanhood, for us to even speak like this shows we have a deeper problem.
Relebogile Mabotja I usually HATE these kinds of shows, but you Ma'am are one of the BEST interviewers I have ever watched. I really connected with this interview and your interview style. Please keep up the good work and bringing these stories to light.
A hill I will die on: I would rather believe a survivor,unreservedly, until I am given reason(supported by tangible evidence) not to than assume that a loophole in the story is indicative of her being untruthful. Secondary trauma is a thing. Someone close to me was abducted. TWICE! And both times, people who were supposed to help her get justice did not believe her story. She went through the most horrific bouts of PTSD. She could take them not believing her because she knew that we believed her unreservedly (thank God for the kind of man my late father was). I believe survivors. Unreservedly. I believe you. ♥️
I wish all man would realise the damage rape can do to a soul.Thank u for sharing ur story im a rape victim iv went through it 15 years ago .it has taken me so many years to try heal,move on and forgive.
I'm so sorry cc im in tears coz a best friend of mine went through rape in our teens and it destroyed her so much and it hurts in my core when I hear rape stories to this day. thank u for the work u do for woman 🙏
I find it interesting that the guilty friend stopped befriending the older sister, and started being friends with the victim- as an older sister, I would have questioned that along the invitation to the party with a minor!
PEACE@NOMA MDA I AGREE! IF I HAD BEEN THE OLDER SISTER I WOULD NOT HAVE ALLOWED THAT FRIENDSHIP TO TAKE ROOT! THE SO CALLED FRIEND MUST"VE REALIZED THAT THE OLDER SISTER WOULD NOT BE AN EASY PREY. I AM A RAPE SURVIVOR AS WELL. THIS YOUNG LADY IS SO STRONG! I PRAY THAT ALLAH CONTINUES TO BLESS HER ABUNTANLY. BELOVED, STAY SAFE, AND BLESSED. LOVE YA FOR FREE! SISTAHLY, PEACE
Firstly, thanks for sharing your story with us. Secondly, congratulations on heeding the call to help mend this broken society we live in. You seem to have become the healing you require. I'm in awe of your tenacious spirit. Keep on keeping on .💜
She is too adorable 🥰 Lebo please TRY to get abusers (across the spectrum) in studio. Honestly, I do not know what difference this would make (I have zero experience in abuse (being at the receiving end) - but the stories of survivors make my blood boil - I just can’t figure out ukuthi at what point, in someone’s head does it become ok to violate omunye umuntu kanje (and all the other cases of abuse - those we get to hear and those we don’t) Yho guyzini 😡😡😡🤬🤬🤬🤬
This is my hope too. Especially if we believe in the correctional system, that people get rehabilitated after prison. Like you said, at what point does one think it’s okay to violate someone like that. But also, where is the turning point where one realizes that they’ve traumatized some and they make a positive change in their lives.
I was almost raped by a friend when I was a teenager I have never told a soul.. When my younger sister wanted to take the guy as her partner to her Matric ball I refused and couldn't say the reason why. Till this day she does nt know why I stopped being friends with the guy
This show makes all of us feel most comfortable sharing our stories because we understand how powerful this is😢 Siyabonga 👏 God be with y’all through the holidays ❤️
I really love how Relebogile Mabotja asks her questions. Instead of making her feel she did something wrong by saying ''Why didn't you go forward with the case'' , she said ''I understand why you didn't go forward, explain to our viewers why you didn't go forward''
What a sad story💔 and to think a lot of women go through this, hurts. I think Rele also went through the same thing, she was more emotional than Sally. Am sorry to every person who has ever suffered any traumatic experience and lost themselves in the process. May the God of peace and love be with u❤
Sally you have walked through fire my beautiful sister. You survived a horrific ordeal and are able to share your story and continue to live with purpose and passion. I salute your powerful spirit and wish you the very best of life. Love and peace 🤗💗
Oh my dear, this lady went through a painful ordeal. May God continue to strengthen her and give her more love. I love what the Principal did, the full support she gave her. May God bless her for the support she gave her.
Sally what a beautiful story multifaceted forgiveness, healing,love,beauty.Thank you to all the people who helped you along the way specifically your teacher and your sister.May God continue to bless you
Sally I too have been raped and I'm so happy that I came across your story. You are a very strong and resilient young woman and I pray that you get healing thru all of this.i pray for your continued strength 🙏🏽🙏🏽🙏🏽
This was an excellent presentation from both of these women... Sally's reflections of her traumatic experience and the healing afterwards was very profoundly explained and the host asked the most appropriate questions in a tone that was neither patronizing nor mechanical. This entire interview was very well executed. Sally you are an amazing woman and your story is inspiring to those of us who need healing from our own life experiences of emotional and mental traumas. Thank you 💖💖
Mom taught never to take food or drinks from a stranger ...I nearly got raped too when was younger but thanks to my cousin who helped out of the situation. There is no way u can protect yrself from it (i do not know how to put in words but iam sure you guys understand).some men will with or without you dressed appropiately etc
Thank you so much for sharing your horrific story... I can't even begin to imagine what you've been through and then to relive it on this public platform... I'm sure your are giving other women the courage to overcome. You are one amazing Queen! Blessings🙏🏿
You not pressing charges killed them. They couldn't live with the guilt. Pain and suffering lead us to our purpose. We always ask ourselves why me. There is a reason why things happen to us. You are the example of that reason. God bless you in your programme be a blessing to those kids
I went through the same experience SAME THING AND IT TOOK ME UNTIL I TURNED 20 TO TELL MY MOM WHAT HAPPENED TO ME AT 13 BUT HER WORDS TO ME TO THIS DAY ILL NEVER FORGET. BUT IM STRONGER NOW HELPING OTHER FEMALES WHO have gone through the same thing to survive and be Goddess.
How she tells this story with a smile on her face shows how strong she it 😭 I'm inspired to be as strong woman like her in any situation. I love you Sally❤️ uyimbokodo
Sally you are strong, beautiful and loved. So many failed you but know that I believe you, I am praying for you. May you have peace in your heart, uncontrollable happiness and a beautiful life. Your story has touched me, never be ashamed of it, you helping so many women. God bless you my beautiful sister ❤️
Baby girl I am so sorry about what happened to you. I am number two out of four girls. We were taken to Matatiele at ages 2, 5 and 7 and the fourth was a baby. We were grossly neglected BUT the people of Ramohlakoana rallied around us. We were left alone without adult supervision. We went to school and nursed each other when sick. At age 55 I discovered that the community was aware of our situation and is proud that we made something of our selves. We experienced every type of abuse at the hands of our mothers family except SEXUAL abuse, the community made sure of that. I am sorry your community did not protect you and your sisters. Please forgive your mother, it is the way they were raised. I guess that the family name and reputation had to be protected at all costs in those days. Heal baby girl. Justice was meted out for you the Biblical way. Prosper and soar. May GOD continue blessing and being with you. HAPPY NEW YEAR
This story triggered me because I nearly got ganged raped last year. I thank God it didn't happen cause I don't know how I would have dealt with it. You're brave Sally. ❤️❤️
‘To forgive someone who never gave you an apology’ you are a true queen! And you are mad strong! Didn’t shed a single tear during the whole conversation. ❤️❤️❤️
😇She said she cried when one of her rapist committed suicide. She s nicer than me. Unfortunately, I wouldn't be crying if I was her/victim. I would've been glad he's gone and burning in hell. 🔥
I was almost raped by a family friend who at that time was at his peak at church, he was perfoming well and he was a true example of what a young brother is at church. When i went to report him at church the following day I was told I am jealous, I am lying and that I should reflect. I had never been that disappointment, hateful and just soo let down by anyone or anything in my life. My mom also said" ono etsang that made him try what you say he tried" she lost my trust and favour then n there. 10 years later his a drunkard that got disfollowshipped from church, his divorced and miserable. I am in a better place really
Sally is such a brave woman. I applaud her for having the courage to not only tell her story, but to want to change the way things are for these survivors. I was drugged and raped when I was 22 years old. most of my family was supportive, but my oldest sister and I will never have the same bond. Like sally, I didn’t want to pursue action (like so many others as well) and because of that I was shamed by her. Made to feel that I was the problem. I honestly haven’t fully forgiven her and although we talk (when I want to see my niece and nephews) she isn’t a sister to me anymore. She has proven that over and over and it sucks when someone you thought would always have your back turns on you.
Oh Nkosi yam, what a sad story, thanks for sharing, i learnt a lesson of not to be quick to judge. Im sympathizing with you. Im happy to hear of your healing journey ❤❤
Thanks for those encouraging words, the part that stuck out to me,is your mom,how you could forgive her,so proud to hear. I am a product of trauma and my mom is the hardest person to forgive because she never believed me nor protect me,nor did she believe me.
As one of the victims, sending you love and light. You are so beautiful. Thank you for doing great work. At Kelebogile, thank you for handling this interaction so well. Well done sisi.
The role played by other women in these rape cases and trafficking is sickening. Ayyy, its gonna take me some time to forgive this "so and so" person. Thank you for sharing your story and thank you Lebo❤❤❤
Sally, thank you for sharing your story and the job you are doing now for other young ladies who have endured such trauma. Blessings. You are a beautiful soul inside and out.
This has has just reminded me of my late sister. I was the 1st person she called when she was at the hospital and I dnt know where I got the wisdom not to ask questions, I was so hurt as if it had happened to me. She moved provinces and bcz she couldn't cope with the rape and few months she passed away. I knwo she is in a better place now bt I believe each rapist may think they got away with it Mara one day they will answer.
To be able to say “I matter” is the most powerful act. All of us are here not because we asked to be, but because we are. We all have a right to be here and we all matter.
I dont wear skirts and feminine tops anymore. Im sitting here trying to remember the first time i went out of the house, where i began to change who i am and how. Sally, you are just what i need. As for the relationship between you and your mom, im glad you mented things. It was coz of the reason that "HURT PEOPLE, HURT PEOPLE" it wasnt her fault either. I really wish to associate myself with people like you...well, YOU specifically. I find it because im going to my therapy session tomorrow and i wish to take your confidence and spirit with me. You will be my pillar Sally, i think amma mention you if thats ok. And really wish to share the outcome and feedback of my session with you. Im hopeful.
Her words are so placed. The true meaning to self-heal. Wow! what a powerful woman, the light will always find a way. Bless you and thank you for sharing
I have immense respect for the detective who showed unwavering determination and persistence in solving the case and bringing justice to the victim. Despite facing numerous challenges and obstacles, this detective kept knocking on doors, gathering evidence and pushing harder to ensure that the perpetrator was brought to book. Their dedication and commitment to their work is truly commendable and serves as an inspiration for us all.
Thank you for the lovely words. Due to past trauma was scared to read comments but I did and I just cried. All the love. Thank you let's save more children
Love and light sisi ❤️
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I loved when Relebogile said that justice will always come around even if you don't get to witness it or hear about it. That is one thing about life, you cannot do something horrible to someone and think you will walk away unscathed. Someway somehow it will get back to you.
So true
Karma is always there no Matt what! Universe is good all the times
Indeed one way or the other. You may never know about it, lucky if you do, like Sally. We all have a conscience.
Yes, God is not mocked, and nobody gets away with nothing.
Karma!! Everthing evil thing u do will happen to too. Evil doers are ignorant of this
As a woman watching this, please be a better woman and a mother
I was looking for someone to say this
Rape is evil. 💔 Tjo. I know and understand why she expected and deserved empathy and support from females. But what struck me as a man, with this case is…really it’s our fault as men. How could we perpetrate such crimes? This killed so many lives (and I’m not even talking the suicides).
I have a theory. I might be wrong…but l think one of the small steps we should take as a society is treating our toddlers the same. Little boys must do the same chores as the girls. I think we can begin there. A very small step.
Wow, we need men like you in our country
Lebo this is so touching finally justice was served.but the lady who befriend was to blame 😭😭😭😭How evil? Wicked
You've raised such a critical point which we're missing as parents in this day and age. Through something as seemingly small as allocating all house chores to girl children, we're making the boy child feel more important than the girl child. The girl child is made to feel they are under and were created to serve the boy child... #FoodForThought
@@thandol448 indeed. There was a time when it was okay for those roles to be entrenched. But we are in new times, with new challenges.
But it’s such a long complex road. The next biggest challenge is how do we challenge drugs. I really suspect drugs were involved in this case. I just cannot think how else one can do such an act. Just the thought of them beating her head brings shivers down my spine…it’s just not normal.
Thank you sir we need every solution we can get
Sally is an extraordinary women. What she was trying to explain is that she got Dissociative Identity Disorder, is a mental process which generates lack of connection in the individual thoughts, feelings, memories, actions or sense of identity. This can happen because of various factors, trauma being one of them.
It is a coping mechanism, the person literally shuts off or dissociates themselves from a situation or experience that's too violent, traumatic, or painful to assimilate with their conscious self.
Sending you love, healing and prosperity.
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Thank you for explaining it so well coz I was a bit confused when she said that she disociated from herself but now I understand and it makes sense that it's a coping mechanism and it's seems like dissociation and many other different forms of mental coping mechanisms that are done due to trauma are done unconsciously until you really sit down with urself and think about it or go to therapy.
I didnt know this word until I was diagnosed years later. NOW I CAN FINALLY BE FREE THANK YOU IM NOT SICK
Thank you for explaining those words. I think there many people going through such kind of situation. We see them around. All we can do is be nice to each other. Be open to others so that they can open up. I hope her mother had learned about the true events of what happened so that she can also council herself. I think her reaction was because she was also traumatized, which does not help the victim in anyway. I also see the challenges the investigating officer are facing when they have a case but only one person can conclude it which in this instance is the victim who was never prepared to stand in court to face the perpetrators.
This was a set up her friend was on this too the should be put in jail as well I'm very this happen to you may God continue to bless you 🙏🏽 your strength
Big up to the principal, for what she did.
This show made me NOT to trust ANYONE. People are really evil out there. I'm so sorry for what happened to you. Might God restore you.
Sally’s ancestors are working overtime
Same here, I have zero trust for all human beings.
She’s so brilliant, I’m sorry you went through that Sally. You’re so strong and girl, God’s got you❤️
Thank you, such kind words
Me too I'm so sorry for what u've been through,yes u did the right thing to forgive so that u can move forward, remember always chin my beautiful ❤️👌😘
Dear Sally, I hope you read this as I was deeply moved by your story. You are a truly beautiful and incredible woman. I celebrate your courage to finally face and deal with what happened to you, as well as your strength and wisdom to forgive; not for the perpetrators, but for your own peace and freedom which you rightfully deserve. I can honestly believe that you've forgiven all the people who hurt you (perpetrators and "non-supporters" alike). I am happy there are people of purpose such as yourself, who're spring out and also available to help support survivors like you.
God bless you and keep you. 🙏
Thank you
The Principal is my hero, big ups to her. It sad that her mother didn't care much of how she felt and never offered her any support. toxic mothers are a topic for another day. thanks girl for sharing your story. I wouldnt wish this to any female. Hope you heal from this.
She was not a toxic mother, our mothers was born different she is 86 and it means she was 69 or 70
“Come back you know where he lives” was the line I got as well. Not being believed only makes the healing journey harder. Listening to this honestly made my story feel heard. Sending love to anyone who currently need it after listening to this.
It’s so sad that the women around her shunned her 😢. The very people that she needed
When an entire circle of friends are all rapists... that is terrifying
Exact same thing I was thinking
To think that no one saw anything wrong is scary
It's a very sick world that's lost their focus on idle time. . Having no self control
Unfortunately it’s not that uncommon. Birds of a feather flock together
@@halacele8571 someone said that this same group of men is known there for having raped a girl every weekend. The village knew but no one spoke up. One of the men (the girls boyfriend) tried to justify it to the public as her punishment for cheating on him. Sick people
This is the most painful part about rape victims.
There's evidence, but in order for the case to go ahead, you have to face your rapists in court, relive the moment and face all the judgments from society.
The system has to change somehow
I'm literally breathing heavily watching this episode and seeing how strong this lady is telling her story.
Not to be insensitive but how will they do a case without the person being there? It’s really sad that this it has to be done this way.
Rape is really brutal, there’s really no healing from it, think her family needed to be there for her and support her with the case but they didn’t do anything...
@@SAG3__ they could be in a separate room that has a camera so that the court could see her testimony. This is what they do in the case of minors so I think they must do the same for all victims of abuse.
I understand the need for courts to decide based on arguments from both sides but I think the perpetrators and victims should not be directly involved in the court on the day the legal decision is being made. I think instead lawyers should be told the perspectives from both sides before hand separately and then they bring up what they were told in the discussions on the court day without the perpetrators and victims present.
@@SAG3__ it can be in-camera, be in another room and hive your evidence, like they do with children.
When she said, “it takes a lot to forgive someone who is not sorry”, it hit hard because I have done that so many times and I still wonder if it was the right thing to do, simply because they continue to behave like I am the problem!
Just because you forgive them, doesn't mean you have a duty to keep people that hurt you, emotional or physically in your life. You are in control of who you keep in your life.
@@serendipity1234-0 Well said
She is an absolutely amazing interviewer. I love how she doesn't over talk the person. It seems she ask the right questions and keeps the conversation on point. She also validates her pain, without stopping the flow. Really awesome job. I feel so bad for the woman this happened to. It's just horrible. God bless her soul.
Right I was just thinking that.. she asked every question I was thinking
She really does know how to ask good questions
As a therapist i am impressed 🥹❤️
Personally I feel like it was really a jealousy thing. You can tell that she was a “good girl” and it sounds like corrective rape. Like they wanted her to be mediocre like everyone else around. This happens a lot in our communities ☹️
You have a interesting perspective 😮. Kind of made me gasp cuz I’ve never been able to put a term to “corrective rape” but it’s def plausible
Corrective rape? That's used on gays and lesbians... justcwhatcwerectgey tryingvto correct? Her innocence?
😮 people are evil, man
I taught my girls to fight off a rapidt tooth and nail, even when they threaten to kill them. I did not consider being drugged or gang raped, where you have little to no chance of fighting. So I was wrong, I must reteach them to live. I raped 2 x at very young ages, but my mind blocked out the actual thing! But I cry from my core everytime I watch such interviews. I may need help and Im almost 50.
Sorry you went thru all of that. I pray for your healing, your a survivor, warrior, you are the light not darkness, your presence is special in this world. Please go find help and teach your daughters how to keep safe
Sending you love and strength and I'm sorry this happened to you. Maybe you should try therapy on your healing journey.
Please find help, never too late. You Don't want to. Pass the trauma on
I mirror your pain. I am am on my 5th day being stuck in bed. Surviving on a one pound bag of chips and a gallon of water. It’s my 61st birthday
@@iamlove113 Happy Birthday 🥳. Psalm 139:14 Get out of bed and celebrate your life. Do something that makes you Happy today🍾
I'm so proud of Sally's strength, growth and willingness to heal. As horrific as this was, you survived ❤. May God continue to use you as a vessel of light for those who've experienced rape.
One day when I have a daughter I'll let her watch all these episodes which is so important. I Love you Sally
While at that make your son watch it too cause our son's in most cases are the instigators.
Been watching Investigation Discovery with my siblings & the 15 year old niece for years now. They need this exposure.
@Cleo Solomons, my thoughts exactly. Infact i want my sons and daughters to watch all episodes of this show.
Exactly what I was thinking!Mine is 4
mine is three months old and I'm thinking the same
When you said "i am sorry" i felt it and cried, thank you for sharing.
As a woman I'm sorry that other females treated you like that, as a mother I hope I do better , as a South African I hate how things haven't improved at all for victims of crimes against women and children😭😭😭
That how Afrucan women and women deal with pain by not acknowledging someone ellses. We women need healing as we are modtly all bictims of some if trauma or another but we need to stand together! A friend was raped by a teacher whon imprenated her she kept the child and loved as it was her child . When she told the daughter it triggered psychosis and she is now so mentally unstable. Unfortunately her mum foed of xancer before the daughters break down
Stop okay! Stop validating and covering up for the so called women.We as this gender honestly need to do better
@@daisyflower1439 noone is validating but if you look at the stats on women who have been sexually abused either as adults ir as
It beez like that sometimes. It be your own.
Sally, I am so sorry that someone thought that it was OK for them to put you through that hell. What makes the whole thing so horrendous is that it was a woman who sacrificed you to those animals. I am so happy that you survived and did not end your life because now you are an inspiration to us all.
All over the world rape victims find it too traumatic to report rape because the police tend to make a mockery of their ordeal. I am from Eswatini and I have heard horror stories where a woman goes to a police station to report rape and the police officer would ask her “How did it feel?” I think that we need to do more to educate the nurses and police about how to support victims of rape and it should be a sackable offence for anyone in those professions to make a mockery of a rape victim. That is the only way they will understand how serious the issue is.
We also need to educate our children more about rape because a lot of it happens at our homes. Kids need to know what their rights are and be confident that if someone violates them then they can report that person. Men who rape know that it’s hard for a woman to prove that rape happened and they are likely to get away with it. I say all rape needs to be reported!!
WHY DO PEOPLE SAY LIKE ANIMALS. IT WASN'T ANIMALS THAT DID THAT EVIL 😈 COWARDLY DIRTY BASTARD'S THING'S IT WAS SO CALLED MAN. BUT I DON'T BELIEVE THEY ARE MEN THEY ARE DEMONS OF SATAN 😡 THEY ARE NOT MEN AND THEY ARE NOT ANIMALS AS THAT'S AN INSULT TO MOTHER NATURES GODLY ANIMALS. IT WAS EVILLLLLLL, COWARDLY DIRTY LOWLIFES THAT DID THAT TO THAT BEAUTIFUL GIRL.
This woman is a Power House... May God keep using her immensely😇😘❤
She's not even crying that how strong she is. I'm so proud of her
You get used to it your emotions kind of disappear my emotions haven’t they come and go and I take my sexual assaults and make them into jokes to cope I still have triggers as well
I know... I started tearing when she spoke about how she didn't get support from her mother!! 😢
I’m sure Sally, has done more then her fair share of crying. And I expect tears still Flow.
Its apart of her Recovery.
She's probably all cried out.
Think her mum felt guilt because of her absence..she’s ashamed she didn’t protect her baby,hope they all heal🙏🏿
I also think like that, she also didn't know how to deal with it.Being a nurse doesn't mean you know or can deal with everything.She also could have gone for counselling as well.
I thought so.
Yea
When women say to another woman "where were you going". "what were you wearing" as a woman you think a woman getting raped is her fault... That is sooo painful we don't need men to say it's our fault coz we telling each other that it's disgusting
A mother askin you that and then acting like they don't know why your relationship is messed up... At 10 I was asked the same thing when a cousin tried to assault me I k Ow its not the same as it actually happening but If it had happened only my dad would have done something about it coz my mum Mos Def made it clear it was my fault that I was hanging around my cousins
Esh
Our ignorance & lack of knowledge in our thinking as women is so clear now through the kind of comments we make when a fellow woman goes through such. We don't see it as an attack on womanhood, for us to even speak like this shows we have a deeper problem.
@@thandol448 for real we have Internalised misogyny
But I wonder when they rape babies they don't ask such questions
@@koffieblessingopportune7169 right coz you can't say what was the child wearing but they will blame everyone besides the rapist
Relebogile Mabotja I usually HATE these kinds of shows, but you Ma'am are one of the BEST interviewers I have ever watched. I really connected with this interview and your interview style. Please keep up the good work and bringing these stories to light.
A hill I will die on: I would rather believe a survivor,unreservedly, until I am given reason(supported by tangible evidence) not to than assume that a loophole in the story is indicative of her being untruthful.
Secondary trauma is a thing. Someone close to me was abducted. TWICE! And both times, people who were supposed to help her get justice did not believe her story. She went through the most horrific bouts of PTSD. She could take them not believing her because she knew that we believed her unreservedly (thank God for the kind of man my late father was).
I believe survivors. Unreservedly. I believe you. ♥️
I wish all man would realise the damage rape can do to a soul.Thank u for sharing ur story im a rape victim iv went through it 15 years ago .it has taken me so many years to try heal,move on and forgive.
You are going to be alright,not now but some day. Take a step ....baby steps.
I just love how Sally got her validation and how she got an avenge from the universe.
This is so sad one day this will be all over
We love you
I am so sorry she went through this💔 No one should experience such an evil.
Hence we need to fight that other children never go thru this
@@starseedstarlite very true. I am so very sorry you had to endure this. 💔
She's so strong and I'm glad she shared this. What an amazing woman
I'm so sorry cc im in tears coz a best friend of mine went through rape in our teens and it destroyed her so much and it hurts in my core when I hear rape stories to this day. thank u for the work u do for woman 🙏
I find it interesting that the guilty friend stopped befriending the older sister, and started being friends with the victim- as an older sister, I would have questioned that along the invitation to the party with a minor!
Grooming. Preditors do this well
It seems like she targeted her because she was younger. What an awful heart she had. I hope she has changed.
PEACE@NOMA MDA
I AGREE! IF I HAD BEEN THE OLDER SISTER I WOULD NOT HAVE ALLOWED THAT FRIENDSHIP TO TAKE ROOT! THE SO CALLED FRIEND MUST"VE REALIZED THAT THE OLDER SISTER WOULD NOT BE AN EASY PREY. I AM A RAPE SURVIVOR AS WELL. THIS YOUNG LADY IS SO STRONG! I PRAY THAT ALLAH CONTINUES TO BLESS HER ABUNTANLY.
BELOVED, STAY SAFE, AND BLESSED. LOVE YA FOR FREE!
SISTAHLY,
PEACE
When the bad thing is about to happen you can't know until it happens. That's the fact
I cannot imagine the guilt of that older sister 😢. At least she was the only supportive one though of all the family.
“Youre a victim and you continue being victimized by other women “ ladies we need to do better
Thank you!!
Firstly, thanks for sharing your story with us. Secondly, congratulations on heeding the call to help mend this broken society we live in.
You seem to have become the healing you require. I'm in awe of your tenacious spirit. Keep on keeping on .💜
She is too adorable 🥰
Lebo please TRY to get abusers (across the spectrum) in studio. Honestly, I do not know what difference this would make (I have zero experience in abuse (being at the receiving end) - but the stories of survivors make my blood boil - I just can’t figure out ukuthi at what point, in someone’s head does it become ok to violate omunye umuntu kanje (and all the other cases of abuse - those we get to hear and those we don’t)
Yho guyzini 😡😡😡🤬🤬🤬🤬
Dude 😭😭
Its horrible i feel sick and angry myself
For sure. There's something that really needs to be unpacked.
Wow. This is powerful. And this would be a game changer. I hope Sis Lebo sees this
This is my hope too. Especially if we believe in the correctional system, that people get rehabilitated after prison. Like you said, at what point does one think it’s okay to violate someone like that. But also, where is the turning point where one realizes that they’ve traumatized some and they make a positive change in their lives.
I'm so sorry my angel on behalf of all the women for judging you or not believing in you ,it was not your fault.
I was almost raped by a friend when I was a teenager I have never told a soul.. When my younger sister wanted to take the guy as her partner to her Matric ball I refused and couldn't say the reason why. Till this day she does nt know why I stopped being friends with the guy
This show makes all of us feel most comfortable sharing our stories because we understand how powerful this is😢 Siyabonga 👏 God be with y’all through the holidays ❤️
She's amazing
What's amazing is that Sally is beautiful, eloquent and oozing a spirit of healing.
What a brave and beautiful woman. She deserves all the happiness in the world!
Now I understand why our minds were made to blank out in such instances. The world is a cruel place 💔 😢
Rape survivors must report these perpetrators. Please, make sure they face the wrath of the law. They belong behind bars.
I really love how Relebogile Mabotja asks her questions. Instead of making her feel she did something wrong by saying ''Why didn't you go forward with the case'' , she said ''I understand why you didn't go forward, explain to our viewers why you didn't go forward''
She's a gem, truly.
What a sad story💔 and to think a lot of women go through this, hurts. I think Rele also went through the same thing, she was more emotional than Sally. Am sorry to every person who has ever suffered any traumatic experience and lost themselves in the process. May the God of peace and love be with u❤
Sally you have walked through fire my beautiful sister. You survived a horrific ordeal and are able to share your story and continue to live with purpose and passion. I salute your powerful spirit and wish you the very best of life. Love and peace 🤗💗
Oh my dear, this lady went through a painful ordeal. May God continue to strengthen her and give her more love. I love what the Principal did, the full support she gave her. May God bless her for the support she gave her.
Sally what a beautiful story multifaceted forgiveness, healing,love,beauty.Thank you to all the people who helped you along the way specifically your teacher and your sister.May God continue to bless you
Sally I too have been raped and I'm so happy that I came across your story. You are a very strong and resilient young woman and I pray that you get healing thru all of this.i pray for your continued strength 🙏🏽🙏🏽🙏🏽
She’s so perfect. So strong and proud.
Preaching for those who need to listen.💗
I cried when she said "it was our little secret to keep" - I felt that - I know exactly what she means
Oh Sally, I'm so sorry you went through all of this 🥺❤️
Relebogile has the power to make the guests feel comfortable and open up.Ooh mahn I love this talk show.
What happened to Sally is 😥💔💔.
I'm 4th!
Wow she is a God sent, so calm, kind and gives hope. U really did a good job by coming and sharing ur story❤🥰
My daughter i am so sorry for your pains i pray that God will give you the strength to stand again. Virtual hugs from me to you my darling.❤🌺🌺🌺
Need the hugs thank you
This was an excellent presentation from both of these women... Sally's reflections of her traumatic experience and the healing afterwards was very profoundly explained and the host asked the most appropriate questions in a tone that was neither patronizing nor mechanical. This entire interview was very well executed. Sally you are an amazing woman and your story is inspiring to those of us who need healing from our own life experiences of emotional and mental traumas. Thank you 💖💖
Court settings needs to be private for victims, victims don't have to face the evil people. Even in the same room.
Love, light and strength to every men or women who have been raped or abused in any way❤️
There's something about how Relebogile asks her questions that makes you feel better!
As a young adult I appreciate this womans strength...may God be with her and every woman ❤
I also had a childhood friend who was raped at age 14 by her school transport driver. Every December 16 of every year I remember her experience.
Mom taught never to take food or drinks from a stranger
...I nearly got raped too when was younger but thanks to my cousin who helped out of the situation.
There is no way u can protect yrself from it (i do not know how to put in words but iam sure you guys understand).some men will with or without you dressed appropiately etc
Thank you so much for sharing your horrific story... I can't even begin to imagine what you've been through and then to relive it on this public platform... I'm sure your are giving other women the courage to overcome. You are one amazing Queen! Blessings🙏🏿
Forgiving someone doesn't mean you have to be friends with them. You forgive but you may not forget.
You not pressing charges killed them. They couldn't live with the guilt. Pain and suffering lead us to our purpose. We always ask ourselves why me. There is a reason why things happen to us. You are the example of that reason. God bless you in your programme be a blessing to those kids
Hope she heals, her story touched me. Sending love and light to her ❤️❤️🙏🏽She’s strong!!!
I honestly haven't been so emotional when watching your episodes, but this one got me so emo. I feel her pain, may God continue to heal her💕💕💕💕💕💕💕
I cried too
I'm so sorry this happened to you. You're so strong and so beautiful.
I went through the same experience SAME THING AND IT TOOK ME UNTIL I TURNED 20 TO TELL MY MOM WHAT HAPPENED TO ME AT 13 BUT HER WORDS TO ME TO THIS DAY ILL NEVER FORGET. BUT IM STRONGER NOW HELPING OTHER FEMALES WHO have gone through the same thing to survive and be Goddess.
Sorry dear
We appreciate you Sally❣️! This is a powerful one! I pray you , your family and all those you reach are able to find great healing and peace 🌱❣️
How she tells this story with a smile on her face shows how strong she it 😭 I'm inspired to be as strong woman like her in any situation. I love you Sally❤️ uyimbokodo
She is so well spoken and I hope a lot of women watch this ❤️
Sally you are strong, beautiful and loved. So many failed you but know that I believe you, I am praying for you. May you have peace in your heart, uncontrollable happiness and a beautiful life. Your story has touched me, never be ashamed of it, you helping so many women. God bless you my beautiful sister ❤️
Baby girl I am so sorry about what happened to you. I am number two out of four girls. We were taken to Matatiele at ages 2, 5 and 7 and the fourth was a baby. We were grossly neglected BUT the people of Ramohlakoana rallied around us. We were left alone without adult supervision. We went to school and nursed each other when sick. At age 55 I discovered that the community was aware of our situation and is proud that we made something of our selves. We experienced every type of abuse at the hands of our mothers family except SEXUAL abuse, the community made sure of that. I am sorry your community did not protect you and your sisters. Please forgive your mother, it is the way they were raised. I guess that the family name and reputation had to be protected at all costs in those days. Heal baby girl. Justice was meted out for you the Biblical way. Prosper and soar. May GOD continue blessing and being with you. HAPPY NEW YEAR
Relebogile. You are an incredible interviewer. Your show is amazing
This story Just bought out some repressed memories😢Thank you for sharing and sorry for all you went through
We're very sorry to learn of your sordid ordeal Sally, you're such a brave woman. Be blessed Sis ❣
This story triggered me because I nearly got ganged raped last year. I thank God it didn't happen cause I don't know how I would have dealt with it.
You're brave Sally. ❤️❤️
‘To forgive someone who never gave you an apology’ you are a true queen! And you are mad strong! Didn’t shed a single tear during the whole conversation. ❤️❤️❤️
😇She said she cried when one of her rapist committed suicide. She s nicer than me. Unfortunately, I wouldn't be crying if I was her/victim. I would've been glad he's gone and burning in hell. 🔥
I was almost raped by a family friend who at that time was at his peak at church, he was perfoming well and he was a true example of what a young brother is at church. When i went to report him at church the following day I was told I am jealous, I am lying and that I should reflect. I had never been that disappointment, hateful and just soo let down by anyone or anything in my life. My mom also said" ono etsang that made him try what you say he tried" she lost my trust and favour then n there. 10 years later his a drunkard that got disfollowshipped from church, his divorced and miserable. I am in a better place really
I pray for your further healing my sister. I’m sorry
Sally is such a brave woman. I applaud her for having the courage to not only tell her story, but to want to change the way things are for these survivors. I was drugged and raped when I was 22 years old. most of my family was supportive, but my oldest sister and I will never have the same bond. Like sally, I didn’t want to pursue action (like so many others as well) and because of that I was shamed by her. Made to feel that I was the problem. I honestly haven’t fully forgiven her and although we talk (when I want to see my niece and nephews) she isn’t a sister to me anymore. She has proven that over and over and it sucks when someone you thought would always have your back turns on you.
She’s so strong hle 🙏may the good Lord continue protecting and blessing her including other women
Oh Nkosi yam, what a sad story, thanks for sharing, i learnt a lesson of not to be quick to judge. Im sympathizing with you. Im happy to hear of your healing journey ❤❤
This is opening up old wounds 😭😞💔 but I’m glad I watched it, it shall help me on my healing journey, most stuff she’s been through I can 100% relate
Thanks for those encouraging words, the part that stuck out to me,is your mom,how you could forgive her,so proud to hear. I am a product of trauma and my mom is the hardest person to forgive because she never believed me nor protect me,nor did she believe me.
Nobody should ever have to go through this!!! Nobody!!!! Sally Dumisa, you are one amazing woman! Sending you love and hugs🥰🥰🥰
As one of the victims, sending you love and light. You are so beautiful. Thank you for doing great work. At Kelebogile, thank you for handling this interaction so well. Well done sisi.
I love the way Mama Rele bonds with her interviewees. I always watch ur shows it teaches a person alot about life. ❤️
I've been avoiding to watch this story.. But today just decided to...
Yoh I've cried from start to end..
What a strong woman 🙌.
The role played by other women in these rape cases and trafficking is sickening. Ayyy, its gonna take me some time to forgive this "so and so" person.
Thank you for sharing your story and thank you Lebo❤❤❤
Sally, thank you for sharing your story and the job you are doing now for other young ladies who have endured such trauma. Blessings. You are a beautiful soul inside and out.
This has has just reminded me of my late sister. I was the 1st person she called when she was at the hospital and I dnt know where I got the wisdom not to ask questions, I was so hurt as if it had happened to me. She moved provinces and bcz she couldn't cope with the rape and few months she passed away. I knwo she is in a better place now bt I believe each rapist may think they got away with it Mara one day they will answer.
This is so sad... Am sorry
so sorry for your loss
Sending you prayers of love and comfort❤️... Cannot even imagine your pain sisi
I just wanna hug you Sally, just to give you the longest hug you never received ...your experience hurts so bad
To be able to say “I matter” is the most powerful act. All of us are here not because we asked to be, but because we are. We all have a right to be here and we all matter.
I dont wear skirts and feminine tops anymore. Im sitting here trying to remember the first time i went out of the house, where i began to change who i am and how. Sally, you are just what i need. As for the relationship between you and your mom, im glad you mented things. It was coz of the reason that "HURT PEOPLE, HURT PEOPLE" it wasnt her fault either. I really wish to associate myself with people like you...well, YOU specifically. I find it because im going to my therapy session tomorrow and i wish to take your confidence and spirit with me. You will be my pillar Sally, i think amma mention you if thats ok. And really wish to share the outcome and feedback of my session with you. Im hopeful.
Dearest Sally, I am so sorry and hope you are safe and well. I pray for you and will continue for you to heal.
Her words are so placed. The true meaning to self-heal. Wow! what a powerful woman, the light will always find a way. Bless you and thank you for sharing
I have immense respect for the detective who showed unwavering determination and persistence in solving the case and bringing justice to the victim. Despite facing numerous challenges and obstacles, this detective kept knocking on doors, gathering evidence and pushing harder to ensure that the perpetrator was brought to book. Their dedication and commitment to their work is truly commendable and serves as an inspiration for us all.