When narcissists are taken to COURT
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- Опубліковано 26 вер 2024
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DISCLAIMER: THIS INFORMATION IS FOR EDUCATIONAL PURPOSES ONLY AND IS NOT INTENDED TO BE A SUBSTITUTE FOR CLINICAL CARE. PLEASE CONSULT A HEALTH CARE PROVIDER FOR GUIDANCE SPECIFIC TO YOUR CASE. THIS VIDEO DISCUSSES NARCISSISM IN GENERAL.
THE VIDEO DOES NOT REFER TO ANY SPECIFIC PERSON, AND SHOULD NOT BE USED TO REFER TO ANY SPECIFIC PERSON, AS HAVING NARCISSISM. PERMISSION IS NOT GRANTED TO LINK TO OR REPOST THIS VIDEO, ESPECIALLY TO SUPPORT AN ALLEGATION THAT THE MAKERS OF THIS VIDEO BELIEVE, OR SUPPORT A CLAIM, THAT A SPECIFIC PERSON IS A NARCISSIST. THAT WOULD BE AN UNAUTHORIZED MISUSE OF THE VIDEO AND THE INFORMATION FEATURED IN IT.
NEVER interfere with an enemy when they are in the process of destroying themselves.
Love this
The Art of War…
It sucks when the enemy is your parent, but when someone doesn’t hesitate to run an ongoing campaign to destroy your spirit, this is a statement too true and one to live by.
Great😂
@@erinward2983 too true. I've found that sometimes you can't tell people who the narcissist is you have to show them.
If they had taught me about narcissism in school I could have avoided A LOT of trouble… and I don’t think I’m the only one
You’re not alone.
Especially with the playground bullies. Remember how the bullies were always pathologically unintelligent and cowardly? Sound familiar?
Completely agree, it should be taught in schools, narcissists are such dangerous and destructive people. It doesn't help that the term is used casually and incorrectly.
Me too
Totally agree It should be taught in school at least to recognise the red flags
My exwife had a hard time in court during our divorce as she annoyed the judge and was constantly complaining and knowing everything better. I kept my mouth shut and let my lawyer do this work and let the law proceed as it was written and guess what, the end result was a huge and unpleasant surprise for my exwife :)
This... Does put a smile on my face.
You were very lucky
@@JoelC6220 I say that all the time about my divorce. I got so, so lucky.
Indeed. Um, um who is another narcissist in court, um um, Tronald Dump.
Same here. Judge told my ex to shut up and respect the court. That was after she yelled that I was a rapist.
A word to the wise, Family Court is a whole other ballgame. My divorce dragged on for ten years. It was a nightmare. It only ended when my NPD passed away. I will NEVER get married again. I didnt know about NPD until much later so I could unscrew my brain from all the trauma and terrorizing I had to live through for decades. He was misdiagnosed as a paranoid schizophrenic, but his doctor warned me he was dangerous and unpredictable. It was too late we were already married and had kids by then. It was like walking on eggshells my whole adult life. He was so dramatic and I lived in fear. Now, I can sense a NPD from a mile away and seek to avoid people. It's very toxic and it feels like you have been poisoned. It takes a long time to detox from that situation.
Sounds more like a psychopath, but it’s called the Dark Triangle for a reason.
I pray 🙏 that you ARE young enough to truly detox and are able to enjoy along, happy peaceful life!
I know what you mean my "spidy sense" for these folks showed up a few years ago. Covert narcissist mother is my trouble, but until a few years ago I had no idea what to call this or why I was always sad. Maybe I take it to far now sometimes. She old and I'm not afraid of her anymore. Sometimes on the rare occasion I do see her sometimes I gaslight her for fun and then if she calls me out I laugh 😂.
"It's very toxic and feels like you've been poisoned."
Wow, do I know how that feels!
I really hope you're okay. ❤️
Kids plus family court vs a narcissist is a special kind of hell I would not wish on anyone. 😢😢😢
True character is revealed when pressure is applied.
I think that anybody who saw the Amber Herd versus Jonny Depp case saw narcissism on trial.
yep
Exactly was I was thinking !
It's heartwarming to me that so many female victims of assault/domestic violence saw through the gender stereotypes the media constantly perpertuated/s in their coverage of that trial and recognized Johnny Depp as a fellow survivor. ❤
Is someone who goes by the name 'Wargasm 'it is transparently obvious why you have completely overlooked the recent and well-publicised trials of Donald Trump!
@@bellaluce7088Yes deeply true. Being a survivor myself it is precisely what I witnessed in Johnny's trial.
Staying calm is excellent advice, but even more important is to document everything and anticipate their arguments. Often narcissists find narcissistic lawyers and they love delaying, derailing and sabotage. To them it's more important that you loose than to get a solution. So basically a nightmare all together. Be prepared for it all!
"Don't do well where they have to tone down their entitlement, they crack, can't stop themselves, roll their eyes, shift in their seat, mumble things under their breath." So true, Dr Ramani, you're the best!
My ex was an attorney..my life with him was like I was perpetually in court being interrogated
Ugh
I feel sorry for you a lawyer got me fired at my job as a re receptoonist. My boss knew what he was doing....my boss was a huge narc friends with many lawyers a d Drs in the community.
Ouch
My ex was a judge. And a supreme narcissist. I didn't stand a chance. My lawyer was in over his head. (It didn't help that he told me he was on a committee with my soon to be ex's GF, another lawyer.)
How awful. Being involved with a cop would be even worse, imo. One of my relatives divorced one and I truly believe she feared for her life most of the time.
I filed a no contact order against my narcissistic FIL, and in retaliation he filed one against me too. I did it on my own, spent 0$, just wasted a few hours plus a few trips to the court house. He hired a lawyer who fleeced him really well. He behaved quite well in the courtroom consider he’s a narcissist, but lied a lot as usual. He really felt humiliated for what I told in the courtroom coz he had a reputation to keep as a “community leader”.
I can imagine a narc in court telling lies contradicting themselves and getting called out.
@@robinkholmes7127 it's a beautiful thing.😊 Every abuse survivor should at least get to witness the show once.
Oh this is delicious!! 😁
Seen narcissists use word salad under their false mask in court. Some ppl fall for it bc they don't understand narcissists.
I took mine to court recently and I totally agree. They were calm, breezy, likable, charming, and the judge fell for it. Judge got snippy with me when they lied and I said that was incorrect because they misspoke. That was upsetting. lied to judge about employment status and said hadn’t had a job in years. I said that was a lie and then changed answer. Judge never called them out. They demanded not paying me back electronically and then when we agreed on mail order they wanted electronic. Not once did anyone see through the game. sent me an email later smug and proud how the hearing went even though I won. I truly don’t think people see through them because today was an award winning performance. They were even joking with complete strangers outside before court started.
What’s the deal you won get over it gosh….
@@Gabe-sf1rl OMG I’m sorry you had to deal with that personality. I was with one for 15 years, now without for 7 yrs and still healing.
Narcissists are so self-unaware that they don't realize how obviously awful they appear to anyone who knows how the system typically works.
Some are aware but just don't care.
Yes! As a business litigation attorney, I've dealt with more than my share of narcissists. Most judges saw right through them. Even though they were a huge pain to deal with and cost their opponents a lot of money, I really enjoyed having opposing parties or witnesses like this because they couldn't bully or manipulate their way to getting what they wanted when they were under oath on the witness stand.
I wonder what an oath means to a narcissist, someone to whom Truth depends on mood.
My Narcissists/Abusers (multiple) just lied (ie, Perjury), Under Oath, over and over and over again with absolutely no negative consequences. I found actual photos of my Ex Narcissist with the Judges (multiple), ie blatant, undeniable evidences of Corruption, which I reported, upon discovery, giving said pieces of evidences. Aren't I entitled, by law, to a Fair Trial??? It is now a Federal Case.
I am still being Deprived of My Rights, Under Color of Law, without legal justification and/or cause, even after the FBI and others have acknowledged, multiple times, in writing, that they have thoroughly investigated and determined that I am a victim of multiple felonies, not the perpetrator!
I was put under State Protection (Address Confidentiality Program Code #146) and literally revictimized into chronic homelessness by Corrupt Judges and Corrupt Public Officials that I have Whistleblown against. Very true, very horrifying story happening right here in the USA!!!
This is not a She Said/They Said situation. I have uploaded over 3,000+ pieces of actual, hard evidences against all of them that they claim "doesn't exist" (ie, Gaslighting) then they demanded the pieces of actual, hard evidences against all of them be returned to them. I was instructed to keep said evidences in my possession for their trials.
Court recently ended with a huge victory for us. The narc rambled on about how good a parent the narc was... Yada yada yada... How much the narc cared and loved the children. Then, the surveillance team entered the court room. Lies were all exposed on the big screen. Proof of the narc putting the children into danger... Proof of the lies. Get yourself a good private detective before you go to court. Pay them whatever they want. Find the money.
Ahhhh.. that made me so happy and content. Thankfully, I figured early on that he did exhibit a lot of narcissistic traits. When he smeared me, I was pretty sure but more concerned. As he wouldn't leave me alone, I began gathering proofs against him. And my my, oh my..! I have a treasure of satisfaction against him. I've filed a case against him and can't wait to go to court! The best part, he knows what I have against him and just to make sure of my safety, I told him that the cops already have everything they need against him! I couldn't hire a private detective, so I became one. All praise be to God! High five!
Congratulations for being smart! 😊
My judge wouldn’t even play the 911 call.
My ex had a set of papers that he needed to turn over to my female lawyer( I chose a divorce lawyer who was on a board at a women’s abuse shelter home thinking she would be so aware of controlling narc situations!) …as we stood lawyer to lawyer in the courtroom, my ex announced he had the papers for her and tossed them to the floor at her feet instead of handing them to her!!!😳…we all stood there totally shocked at this behavior!!!! Yep…I had chosen well for my lawyer….she totally understood all the antics of the narc!!!!That was 2005… couples counselors were not up to speed at dealing with narcissistic abuse…my lawyer and my personal counselor were on top of things from the start !!!! But today there is so much going on in the area..I am finally letting myself off the hook…I already survived…now on to thriving !!!!
The fact that your ex couldn't be subtle for even a minute with his condescending attitude. I'm sure his lawyer was facepalming on the inside.
I gasped at that. If your ex would do that in a courtroom, in front of a judge and attorneys, I can only imagine what you had to deal with behind closed doors. I am glad to hear you escaped and survived ♥
@@tribblegirl2 ❤️❤️
Most terrifying experience of my life. The judge was also a wife beater and a narcissist. He punished me for leaving my abuser.
Terrifying indeed.
Probably the kind of judge I will get. I am sick over worrying
They will steal your children , your dogs, and your mother's bible., And never have to suffer the consequences of their actions
I disagree. I never got any justice from my NPD husband. Mine would cry crocodile tears on cue for court even tho he never cried in all the 20 years we were together. Not even when our son died in a car accident. He was a beautiful liar, too. I could only wish his pants caught n fire in the courtroom. lol He stole pages out of my journal to try to use against me. He had a tote bag full of notes about me. He had an affair partner (twice divorced) where he could go to her for divorce advice and to use her phone. Then it was two against one. He tried to starve me into a divorce agreement. He tried to honeymoon me into a divorce agreement. He tried to trash my name in public any chance he got. He was a sick f*cking bastard. He's passed away now. A victim of his own lifestyle. Good riddance, Andy. I felt such relief he couldnt hurt me anymore. I was giddy when I saw his obituary in the paper.
My wife’s ex, who adopted 2 kids with her, left for Hollywood to become an actress 6 months after signing the papers. She was living off their state support checks in LA and applying for food stamps in the kids names. That triggered child support to come after my wife who quickly proved the kids were living with her. The support checks got redirected back to my wife and the ex had to go to child support court where she was ordered to pay my wife @$300 a month. She stood there in disbelief and actually said to the judge “I have to pay HER!?!”
The judge said YES, and when you start working, you can pay her MORE.
It was a delightful victory against that terrorist. I will never forget it.
I am living vicariously through you and your wife. I love hearing stories where people get one up on their narc. I never was able to do it.
@@denisedevoto5703 it took a lot of work! So much stress. But worth it. Our kids are 17 and 18 now. We split the ex’s child support between two savings accounts for the kids for when they graduate.
The ex lives on the east coast somewhere. She stopped filing for full custody a few years ago. Life is good! lol
OMG! This is SPOT ON! It’s incredible because this is exactly what happened in court against the narcissist in my life! Got in major trouble with judge!!
My attorney said ""dont say a thing" Let him bury himself, and he did.
The low functioning abusive awful Narcissist was a nightmare in court. He appealed our divorce and actually won to appeal even with his series of other crimes he was navigating legally through. It’s a triggering series of events that I now call tuition. he was tolerated in an unbelievable fashion in court, muted, but rarely faced any contempt charges. I’m writing a book on this experience because it’s morbidly fascinating
I too would like to write a book but I want to likewise burn those memories forever and not give them any life.
I agree with that however, I still am working with the court system, extending my protection order for my own good because it’s necessary. . Other people need to hear and not feel alone. I don’t know what folks do that have little knowledge and support in their circumstance. I was able to overcome because I have means, and I don’t have little children, I feel like I could help somebody else. I started leaving him in 2015 and it took until 2018 to safely get out of the house and then my divorce has only been final for one year. Yes the second one🥲 the first one was granted in 2019 December 4.
@@SeeCSeesCCYes please write your book🙏🏻!!! My daughter is married to (I/we believe) a nasty Covert Narcissist. We're going to need a lot of help in court. She has the same amount of young children as fingers on one✋🏻. He constantly threatens to use Blackmail full of lies to Social Services when she wants to call the police on him after he hurts her. He says go ahead you'll know what will happen if you call them, meaning he'll lie to the police until they take her little one's away. He says she'll have to prove herself innocent before they'll give their 5 little ones back to her💔. He's abusive in every way possible. He provides absolutely nothing for them so I have to pay for everything with my military widow's annuity. It doesn't go very far & isn't very much which explains my credit card debt over the last 11yrs providing for them. He's a demon👹 in sheep's clothing literally!! I have no idea how to proceed on such a limited income to attain a lawyer. Or what to start doing to keep him from harassing/ harming my daughter and the trickle down effect on my young grandchildren. He's been kicked out of the home I provide for them ( a year & a half) and uses his Blackmail Lies to gain access when he feels like seeing the kids, is hungry but does want to pay for his own food or wants to secretly record her after initiating an argument again. I should write my own book quickly before I hit 70 in the next couple of years. It would probably be a best seller but I might need a ghost writer I think🥹.
Weaponizing the court system in child custody/support cases should be forbidden.
@@rootsiebee I already know, but it makes lawyers a lot of money
It is amazing to see a judge ask a direct question and to see them scramble to do their "answer by not answering" thing, in a situation where it's not allowed. At the end of the day it's respect, they at least understand that they want the judge to like them, that the judge has influence over their life.
FYI ladies I was able to get a lawyer for a PFA via a women's shelter. I applied for a grant because I didn't have income and the services were covered. It saved my life.
What is a PFA?
I need help
@@samahvargascapellan where are you? What is the situation? Emotional or logistical support?
My son abandoned me 6 years ago. I think his narc dad turned him against me ( parental alienation). I reach out to him every holiday but he never responds. I even asked him if he wanted to go to therapy and he never responded. He moved to St Thomas, VI and started a business on the Beach. We would have to use Zoom/Telehealth if he decides to come back into my life and work things out. My son became very successful. I helped him get his Masters in Industrial psychology too. Of course his dad is "top dog" and helped him also get through college. My son and I have Bipolar2 and he blames me for that. We used to be very close. He has picked up some of his dad's traits. I cry on Mother's Day. I never thought this would happen to me. He's 36 years old and I don't think I'll ever see him again.😢
I know what you're going through. I have a 15 year old daughter who has been alienated from me.
I regularly send her messages but do not get any responses. It's very tough emotionally.
I've never received a birthday card nor a father's Day card.
There are many of us and remember you are not alone ! Like you I anticipate that I'll never see her again and I pray for a glimmer of hope going forward. 🙏🏼
😢
I am sorry😢😢😢
I'm so sorry for your loss in this matter. Hope you have love in your life, you deserve love.
Same here, x3 - ex alienated them from my life approx 3 years ago, after I called him out on his evil. He behaved just like an adolescent that day, and paid me back with a smear campaign that would have me questioning my very existence - all based on manufactured lies.
I love how passionate and knowledgeable you are with your work. You’re such a gift to the world. So inspiring.
The judge told him that arguments do not cause broken bones. He broke my wrist and was arguing it wasn't him that it was JUST an argument. I got my Protection order. Only 6 months and he broke it 13 times. He keeps getting jail time, doesn't show for court, gets off with this and that. But 3 states have warrants out for him. He's currently in jail. I breathe easy for a while.
It was such a pleasure to hear about my narcissistic brother in-law in divorce court. The judge would not put up with any of his usual obnoxious comments . It must have been cathartic for my sweet sister-in-law who had endured it for 30 years. By the way Dr R., that’s a great fashion look on you. 😊
I divorced my narc and everyone was taken in by him, even my lawyers. It was a horrible 3 years until it was finalized. Everyone thought he was so great. It’s been almost 3 years and I’m still working on recovering.
😢
Reminds me of an early red flag in my last narcissistic relationship. When we met, I was going to the gym regularly and looked and felt really good. So when we started dating I invited him to join me. It was clear that he wasn't excited about the prospect but I thought maybe he'd find that he enjoyed it so I persevered. About 30 minutes later, he comes up to me in a rage to tell me that we needed to leave. I'm like, why? He says that he was told that he couldn't work out in sandals. I hadn't really noticed but who goes to the gym in sandals? He was so enraged that they had told him he couldn't stay there without closed toe shoes, and it was clear we would never be back. Knowing what I know now, I so wish I would have said, those are the rules and they make sense. What's your problem? That would no doubt have ended our relationship. Sigh, such a great way to avoid a narcissistic relationship!
Interestingly, my narcopath husband is the MOST SELF CONTROLLED, calm, cool cat anyone will ever see. He will suck it up when he has to and does completely fly under the radar and dance on the line of the law. He is cunning and terrifying !!!! I don't live with him for the past 3 years
^^^ This ^^^
Yes. Same. Terrifying.
I had to do my case by Zoom and I had to wait almost five hrs. to wait for my case to be held. I just couldn't believe how my ex denied things. I was so happy the judge could see thru his lies, she awarded me the PTO and allowed me to get paid for my hospital bill for when I had to go to the emergency room for when he punched me in my stomach and the judge allowed me to get paid for the eight to nine days I stayed at a hotel waiting for my ex to get served the PTO.
I couldn’t be more thankful. I watched this video maybe 3 times in the past month. I had my court date today. My child’s mother acted EXACTLY how you described she would. I did exactly like you said and kept cool and never tried to explain anything. Just answer the questions.
It works ladies and gents!!
My mother lied about domestic violence and took me to court, and when i brought my lawyer along, she looked stunned. She assumed the experience will break me. She end up having to withdraw all her allegations but lost me and my brother as her kin forever. She is now old and alone.
I had to get a Restraining order. Three times on my property documented w police. Then I filed looked up all the info on how to get a Restraining order. Not fun! But, i got one and I got distance for a time moved to another state and he still tried to hoover. Went right to the police filed a report and I will keep filing reports w the law every-time he tries to engage w me. Document Document Documents!!!
Most of them hide behind high priced lawyers and don’t say a word (on advice from said Lawyers)
This worked in court on the covert narc I used to be married to. I paid for the transcripts just because she was caught plain as day in 6 different complete fabrications and fits. Oh and yes her attorney quit shortly after she was exposed. WORTH EVERY PENNY!!!!
My divorce of 22 year marriage was a nightmare. My attorney actually apologized to me (after 28k fees) for not “believing” me. As she said during one of the many settlement conferences that “no matter what corner I go to, he goes to the other”. 30 years later I still feel the effects of that relationship.
I went to court with my ex husband (covert narcissist) he berated the female judge over the protection order. She didn’t grant it because they were more concerned about his military career! He brought up my PTSD and said that I was over reacting because of that although HE ADMITTED TO ABUSING ME!! He said, “ Yes, I did abuse her BUT that was in MY past!”🙄
My SIL thought she could persuade the judge like she was always able to squirm out of situations. He shut her down so fast and didn't hear any of her moving speeches. He wanted to see evidence. We had a lot, so we won.
pray for me
😂 my favorite ever "...we can't prosecute someone for being an asshole"
My late husband was a raging malignant narcissist attorney who said things like I can get you committed or held on a 72 hour hold. Its easy. Or I know of a few ways to kill someone and get away with it, like drowning. You get the picture. Needless to say I never stood near the edge of a cliff with him.
I love that he's your late husband! Yikes! You are also a survivor!!
@@yvettedavis7799 Sadly I knew the universe was looking out for me. A reward as it were for enduring.
A very timely subject considering all the recent and comical Trump trials!
Yes, the only positive thing Trump has done is educate us about narcissism-and also some legislative loopholes we need to close. 😊
One of my narcissistic exes falsely accused me of sexual assault, harassment, and “stalking,” despite the fact that we lived together. The judge was obviously biased against males to have signed off on the ex parte, but once we got to court I didn’t even have to present my evidence of all our text messages. Because the judge caught her contradicting herself, then rolled his eyes at her when she brought up Facebook. (And she had altered the messages from the original to lie about me!) The judge threw out the case and then my narcissistic ex cried because she didn’t get her way.
My hubby of 48 years, wer're now in middle of divorce. I've been no contact for 3 years. He ignored the judge's ruling in February, so that the judge in June wouldn't put up with his control. She let him talk himself into a corner. She removed his control and manipulation of me and the court. We've still got a way to go, but it felt good when I was recognized as a stable person and not the mental case he had me in for years. Let them talk!
Recently, I took my narc mom to court to end a 12 year guardianship. She said that if she had tried to stop it from happening it would only lead to further escalations on my part. I won, and I haven't heard from her since. Now my life is my own and I can start thriving instead of just surviving.
If only judges were trained on Narcissistic behaviors .... so many people "CRY" sob without tears - and judges fall for it.
Same experience! When I left the relation ship I called CPS to help me deal with him. I said I cannot give him our daughter without his mother being present looking for her safety. The CPS Lady was amazing. She reassured me "we know this kind of people" and arranged a familiy reunion. His family and my family met to sit at the table and discuss solutions. He sabotaged completely an blocked everything that everybody was so annoyed in the end.
In our city, a group of hundreds former students of a church and school associated with the church, have brought a class action lawsuit against the church and school.
The charges include assault, assault with a weapon, and sexual assault - committed by everyone from the narcissistic head pastor (who has returned to Texas, and is evading legal service), to a local narcissistic city councillor, to former "teachers" (who were not certified by the local school board), Sunday school teachers, and more staff.
There have been, to this point, four former staff (narcissists) charged with criminal activity, and we have spent most of the year in court.
The narcissistic ones are the most religious and defiant.
One former gym teacher has pled guilty in an agreement, and is due to be sentenced for his crimes (he sexually abused a young woman - then a child, and called it an affair) in January 2024. He's contesting his sentencing, because - of course it's the young woman's fault. Plus, he says he admitted his guilt, so he should have special treatment - lesser sentence.
Another criminal defendant is wanting to "come to an agreement," but the male charged alongside of him is so arrogant and abusive, that there has already been at least 3 adjournments due to the disagreement. We (I am a parent of some of the former students) are going back to court this week for the arrogant male - who pled "absolutely not guilty, your honour" to the sole charge - demanding a trial by judge alone (he appeared in court with his wife, and two other males. He was dressed like a fashion plate, while his wife - who had to sit behind him - flanked by the two males, was dressed plainly - almost frumpy. She had no style at all, and was not allowed to speak to her husband, who was on his chair - sitting like he was on a throne - in front of her. She was silenced (non-verbally) by a man sitting to her right.
The fourth male (extremely narcissistic) is the one who did the most damage to my own family. He is so arrogant, that he didn't even show up to be fingerprinted, and the police - after a warrant was issued - hunted him down at his home, to fingerprint him.
He has pled "definitely not guilty - I did not do the things I am being accused of" through his lawyer, on a phone call. He has never appeared in court. His lawyer has called in to court on his behalf.
He also appears to feature prominently in the "parent's rights" demonstrations, in media photographs, that took away basic human rights from trans children in our province. The things he, and his now deceased wife, did to me and my children are heinous. Those abuses were 34-35 years ago, and it has taken our family until today to finally start to get resolution.
Our legal system is seemingly indifferent to religious abuses, and our "justice system" isn't just. It has taken decades of complaints being made for anything to be taken seriously. I, myself, made police complaints back in 1991, and spoke with reporters about the things we escaped from back then, too. But, the police didn't seem to want to do anything about what was alleged - or, there "wasn't enough evidence."
Or something.
If you want to learn more about what has happened, there is a Spotify podcast called, "The Legacy Of Abuse Podcast."
Links are provided in the "about" part of the podcast, to the class action suit, and other things.
These narcissists have abused in the name of their chosen religion.
I divorced my (then) husband, because he was so abusive, after swallowing the beliefs and teachings, seven years after marrying him. As a narcissistic abuser, he continued to abuse for decades, and currently listens to your UA-cam videos - claiming he is "learning how to not abuse." (But, we all know how that works.)
Our story is extreme, and we have been so damaged by what has happened - because of narcissistic abusers.
But, it is more common than people know.
And, religion hides a LOT of such stuff.
Narcissists will also use the legal system to hurt their targets. We know that. And, it happened to me when I divorced my ex.
Sorry for the long comment. I wish people could actually see and understand what narcissists do.
No need to apologise about the length of the comment. It’s open and honest to your experiences. I do hope you’re on the right path to healing…You’re a brave survivor. Remember that.
@@clairejones624 thank you for your kindness.
I wish I found Dr.Ramani a few years back. Her insight has been so freeing and I thank God. I’m still dealing with a narcissist but I’m learning to step out of the dance. I don’t feed the ego…..
I have a psychopathic (or at very least, highly malignant) father, and I remember how my mom's divorce lawyer literally wouldn't believe the things she'd say about him, she first told my mother 'And what exactly am I supposed to do here?'....that was until she met him in court - and saw firsthand how he just made things up out of thin air such as my mother constantly taking money from their shared bank account (that never existed, bc my mom doesn't do shared bank accounts out of principle) and the most ludicrous things that sure worked well among colleagues to start smear campaigns, but not when everything you say will be investigated for proof.
Narcissists have no respect for anyone in a position to judge them, ie, therapists, psychiatrists, bosses, judges or anyone in authority who can tell them what to do. They're afraid of those people but moreover, despise the power they have.
Narc cousin took his ex to court in another country for full custody of their children. He lost. It was everyone elses fault. Not his, the financial abusive, physically and emotionally abusive narsacist that was at fault. He wanted the children so he could give them to his narsacist mother to raise (cause she did such a stellar job already). He lost it and continues to pretend he wanted his children, when all he wanted was to punish his ex for leaving him.
This is very reassuring. Thank you. I’m about to go head to head with a massive narcissistic person and if I win he’ll be send to prison for a long time. I hope what you said happens on the day. I agree he’ll struggle from the loss of control which will be controlled by the judge ❤️❤️
Sounds like a playground for the covert narcissist.
Beautiful advice. Sadly we have to accept judgements don’t always go our way. Unemotional dignity and calm is the way. My narc ex had honed his skill as a poker player and his very expensive barrister meant he spent minimal time giving his evidence and zillions of objections from barrister made a joke of the process. I was able to see his ‘tell’ of seething anger that had nowhere to go. I’m just mighty glad it’s over and take comfort in knowing I’m not alone thanks to Dr Ramani and you empathetic followers 🙏🏻
Dr Ramani, I will buy your book in a heartbeat❤ you are amazing ❤
My ex almost went to trial due to his show of victimization. After 2 years of He only wanted to be a good father, he took his son fishing last year. Him and his attorney tried some tactics that backfired on them both. Judge sided with me
Oh boy is this video timely! 🤭When that person cannot stay on the subject of what the judge asks them (and they just delay, delay, deflect, etc.) then they play the victim card while trying to put on a “strong” demeanor. 🙄
This is exactly what happened in my divorce court. I stayed calm and quiet and my acted out.
Same! It was amazing to have the judge be so appalled by his smirking, contempt and general inability to follow the basic seriousness of the proceedings!
My Narc announced that he’d never permit me to divorce him. He said his lies would be believed and, yes, he smirked. I wish I’d tested that out…
I know a narcissist who refuses to get a lawyer. Because they wholeheartedly believe they can do better than any existing lawyer
Ordered the book.. Can't wait to turn the pages of the wisdom that you have been sharing..beacon of hope
Sometimes the judge is the narcissist in court.
This is a big concern
Brilliant and Fascinating. The more places we can identify and understand this behavior, the better. You so Rock, Dr. Ramani!
enjoyed the video and loved the comment that you can’t prosecute them for being an asshole… Thank you
My narcissistic aunt took me to court over my inheritance. I got a lawyer and was ready to fight it when we found out that my aunt went behind our back, set up the court date, never told us about it, and since we didn't show up, she won. My aunt's lawyer stopped being a lawyer immediately after that. That's when I learned that immoral is not the same as illegal.
Wow. I’m sorry to hear your story. It’s truly amazing the way people behave and treat those they’re supposed to love. Greed corrupts the ill willed easily, and this is a testament to that.
@@erinward2983 Thank you so much for your concern. Greed was apart of it, yes, however she is from a family of shitty people and this was just one more horrible thing to add to the list. I went no contact with the entire family.
Surely you can contest the ruling?
@@chantesammering My lawyer said there was nothing we could do.
Even though I feel like we're missing a WHOLE lot of facts here and I don't know what state you're in, I'd get another attorney for a second opinion. Generally, ALL parties to a proceeding like that are supposed to be notified AHEAD OF TIME. I mean - it depends on what the contested inheritance actually was (money vs property, juts for one example) as well as what the rules are in that jurisdiction, but ... sounds fishy @@sam-wise777
Narcissists think they are on stage, in a courtroom, and really let it fly.
The judges usually let them show themselves.
This is spot on dealing with this now.. the mediator had to force her to agree on something only to disobey it when it was my time for the kids.. Same in the court room she was all over the place.. I kept calm I only spoke when it was my time to speak but.. it's like a train wreck in slow motion.
My narcissistic ex took me to district court to try and take my cat away from me, after already terrorizing me by taking him from me & rehoming him for two months in which I was desperately searching for him & absolutely distraught. I remained calm once I got served, retained a lawyer, did all the prep I needed to on my end and got in therapy to help me through it. My ex thought he could represent himself (in typical narcissist fashion) and failed miserably. The trial was absolutely embarrassing on his end as he did not know what he was doing and he said the most insane things that even had the judge in shock. Meanwhile my lawyer completely schooled him. Although it did not take much because he literally was his own downfall. Like I’m telling you, he was a complete laughing stock and just kept digging holes for himself to fall into with all the lies he couldn’t keep track of. It was the most entertaining, satisfying outcome I could’ve ever asked for, and I haven’t heard from him ever since, and I’m living the best no contact life (with my cat) and I’ve truly never been happier. Happy endings do exist and I’m so grateful I had one in this scenario.
I was raised by a malignant narc male and a covert narc female (they don't deserve the usual parental titles) and their divorce when I was 8 years old was horrific. The male was so vengeful toward the female and would go to any length to make her life miserable. He poured bleach all over her flower beds in the yard to reduce the value of the home that she was going to be awarded in the settlement. He barely paid child support for 4 years and had no care that his children were living in poverty. He was so angry that his ex wife got full custody of his daughters.
Visitations with him were a joke. All he did was drill us about what his ex was doing and with who.
You are describing my male parent as if you knew him personally. He was such a criminal and even used people's social security numbers to apply for credit cards, even mine.
Thank you for acknowledging what we’re all seeing on the news every night about our former President. I hope by acknowledging his condition, maybe some who love him will finally see the light.
By his condition do you mean narcissism or just plain evil? What he and his father and family did to his uncle is so horrendous.
He’s the only president that hasn’t gone to war and killed millions of civilians for financial gain and resources .. I’m not saying he’s not a narc , I can’t comment on that as I’ve not felt with him directly but remember the corporations running the show including media are narcisstic… if the media are saying someone is bad they are usually good... Clinton, bush, Obama etc are all extremely psychopathic and narcissistic by their behaviours and connections to the WEF and Trilateral commission .. dont be deceived by the wolf in sheep’s clothing
Everyone in the world were under serious cohersion narc abuse tactics when it came to cvid and jabs.. the cohersion, smear campaigns , manipulation etc were so apparent to those of us that have studied narc abuse.
Their aim… divide and conquer
Trying to get a protective order is a whole new lesson l have to learn now
My narcissitic husband charmed the magistrate and she fell for it.😢❤
Can't wait to read Dr Ramani's book!
could you possibly do a video about estrangement from narcissistic children since the holidays are coming up?
I am in this situation and I’m finding it very hard to deal with and I’m sure there are a lot of other people out there dealing with this as well… I very much enjoy your videos, and they are very informative
I am in that situation as well. My son is the carbon copy of his N father, he even uses the same insults and tone. And just like the Narcissistic marriage relationship, I keep hoping my son changes back into a kind and loving person that I used to know.😢
Love is like a fart if its forced itll probably be crap
@@janeloraine6231 I am in the exact same situation as you… My ex-husband is a narcissist and has groomed my son and unfortunately, my son is a replica of him… I pray every day that God opens my sons eyes so that he can see what is going on and that I want him to be a good person and lead a good life… This is a very hard thing to deal with
Please, no pressure to answer. I'm the daughter of a narcissistic father, and of divorced parents. I went no-contact in June. Is your husband narcissistic...and, were your children raised in separate households?
Mine are assholes, too. Sorry. Just do what you can to get through the holidays until that's finally over. It's so depressing. You cant change a narcissist. Not ever. Even if they are your own kids.
In my experience narcissists love to take others to court and very good at appearing to be a perfect plaintiff.
Thinking how to face naraccist wife in court. She is dragging me to court
One of the narcs in my life took her "baby-daddy" to court. He was/is a VERY GOOD father, but a "new" guy came on the scene, so she wanted the "old" guy out of her life. So she lied like a rug! When he returned the favor and took HER to court, her MO was to cry, dramatically, and constantly, so the court proceedings never got anywhere. It was pathetic.
Set up/ so I thought in court...
It didn't happen to me it happened for me....(. I know it was you GOD )
Behavior wise it helped me, that Narcissist was floored and that Judge was amazing..... GLORY 🙏🏾🔥🔥🔥🔥🔥
Thank you so much dr Ramani. My narcissistic uncle is taking me to court to fight me over my my grandmothers Will. All of your videos have kept me sane. 💛
Maybe we should prosecute assholery, bet there would be less crime.
Or maybe create an organization
for recovery and call it 'Assaholics Anonymous'!🤣🤣🤣
@@matt3024 Narcissist and psychopaths probably wouldn't, usually, identify as assholes, nor would they attend such a group, because they would find it boring and because real assholes think that other people are problems or just born on this earth for them to exploit and mindf___.
I took brother to court for his abuse to me he's very narissant and crewl he feels he's above everyone. I am not here to be abused by him .or anyone else. Sunny 😎
This is very well timed. Thank you for the insight and advice xx
DR R 5 years you have been there for ME. Thank you book on order. 🎉🎉🎉🎉🎉I owe you my life! 😊Penne
Yep, * Just under the radar *, thanks on that feedback -- Covertism at-large. ✌️☮️
The sooner I can see the evidence, as sooner I can actually deal with it in court
Never negotiate with a narcissist
My narc ex SIL lied her a$$ off to a judge and I lost. The bailiff did nothing. The truth lost.
My narcissistic mom had a messy divorce. She asked my advice, her plan was literally to guiltrip the judge, I told her that was a terrible idea, she hated me for it. Then in court she kept writing strongly worded letters to the judge full of caps lock insults with a mix of guilttip and female (women are always right) entitlement. She didn't comply to even the most basic requests from the judge. In his sentence, the judge said she left him no choice but to side with my dad in every aspect of the divorce, she had to pay even for his lawyers.
As soon as she was in an environment where people care about accountability, she fell apart as hard as it is possible to do so.
Yep- my current life. Court makes him pissed 😂
I was always walking on eggshells, lest he whack out on me or the kids. I didn't get my own lawyer... just agreed to everything he and his lawyer wanted... I just wanted it over with. At our final divorce hearing, he told the judge I wouldn't let the kids visit him. He had bought a house 4 houses down the block from us. The kids wanted nothing to do with him because he was NEVER a "father" to them. The judge believed him, and spent a half hour reaming me out for trying to keep the kids away from him, and threatened to take them away from me. I had always encouraged the kids to keep up a relationship with their Dad, and NEVER EVER said anything to harm their "relationship". My husband was always a good talker, always sounded rational... except when he went berzerk. After our final divorce hearing, he wanted to take me out to eat... I went. Afterwards he spent 45 minutes trying to convince me to have sex with him... no words of caring or loving me ( just like before), he was just horny.
Can’t wait to receive this book next week 🙏🦋❤️x
This explained exactly what it was like to be in court with the narc of my life. He but he could lie without conscience. He made the judge upset by disrespecting her. And interrupting her.
I did not know how to deal with it all, and the judge just assumed he and I had a disagreement. It became exhausting to try to keep up with the lies, The judge just got fed up.
Not sure if he has ever been diagnosed, but i watched the entite Darrell Brooks trial. If anyone had NPD it was Brooks. I cant even describe it.
Almost a decade in family court with a NEX. I fired my attorney over a year ago, and have since enjoyed victory after victory. A few tips. Narcs believe they are above accountability; any failures or shortcomings are to be blamed on someone else, like their attorney. You got a paper divorce...cool...now get an emotional divorce. Narcs like to push your buttons...find a calm and relevant way to push theirs on the witness stand. They cannot push your buttons if you got that emotional divorce previously mentioned. Our last bout in court ended with my NEX's attorney arguing with the magistrate before angrily withdrawing her contempt complaint.
They can't hide all the time in front of a judge.
I bet a lot of judges can see through narcissists.
His name is wouter van der gaag from Middelburg Zealand the Netherlands. He has dated me for 3 years promised marriage beaten me and cheated on me and broken my stuff. When i took him to court he came with an ukrainian 50year old named olga stepanyuk and he played the victim that i sued him out of jealousy... Olga was screaming at me although i Talked kindly to her. Because i proceeded suing him non stop he changed countries he dumped olga and he moved to sofia Bulgaria
This has been the biggest / best piece of advice I've gotten in the whole process... the one where you don't respond at all, or respond extremely limited. They really can't handle that. To respond to their accusations and threats only brings you to their level. They will be their own downfall when left to their own devices.
So true. My nex hid behind his expensive barrister until the final hearing, where the judge was able to see right through him! The system is still messed up though, family court doesn't care about domestic abuse and many convicted criminals are still given custody / access to their children. I was thinking that his barrister must also be a narc to have carried out his instructions and be so awful to me, knowing that he had been arrested so there was substantial evidence against him. Don't know how they sleep at night. And 5 minutes later he's trying not to adhere to the order!! 🙄
I know of an elderly narcissist that went into a courtroom in his wheelchair and put on such a show that the judge actually said something like, "You are the star of the show, sir, but you need to let the hearing take place", and he wheeled himself all over the area in front of the judge for like 10 more minutes carrying on lmfao. It definitely made for great drama!
The police keep telling me I should’ve went to them along time ago when the stuff was happening I told them I thought if I just ignored them it would stop it hasn’t most recently been smashing my mailbox I got a long driveway so I gotta blow more money on a special camera on my mailbox. Been trying to call investigators and lawyers but nobody seems to want to help me. I think this one is getting away with a lot people keep dying and getting sick around them.
Well cases vary and folks should be warned there are narcissists in the justice system also police lawyers judges etc. and they will potentially enable criminality themselves particularly if it's financially motivated a narcissist pays thousands more in court fees for example and it's a pay to play system.