When the Narcissist Realises Life Sucks Without You

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  • Опубліковано 16 вер 2024

КОМЕНТАРІ • 436

  • @susanlina1070
    @susanlina1070 2 роки тому +262

    All I know is life sucks with a narcissist
    I could care less if they miss me or not!

    • @drayanicole
      @drayanicole 2 роки тому +17

      Period ‼️

    • @dawnhandelman308
      @dawnhandelman308 Рік тому +3

      Can’t wait to I feel like you!!!!

    • @fairyspunfibers9098
      @fairyspunfibers9098 Рік тому +3

      @SUSAN LINA
      Same! Mine tried to hoover me after he had betrayed me, left me, divorced me, tried to stick me with all his debts that he accrued with his mistress (!!!), etc.... Judge didn't allow that sh*t, thank God!
      He BEGGED me to take him back.... I laughed in his face and told him a few home truths about himself and how very UNworthy he was to have had me to begin with.
      MAN, that felt good! At the time (40 yrs ago), I had never even heard of Narcs, but now I know exactly what he was (yes, he's dead).

    • @louisemagill8295
      @louisemagill8295 Рік тому +3

      * couldn't care less. If you could care less, then you care a bit.

    • @irielion3748
      @irielion3748 10 місяців тому +2

      And I couldn't care less.

  • @nancyk7954
    @nancyk7954 2 роки тому +293

    Ever notice a narcissists talks, and talks, and talks, and never says anything? Maybe narcissists simply enjoy the sound of their own voice.

    • @francoisgouws7288
      @francoisgouws7288 2 роки тому +42

      Endless monologues on randomised subjects that catches their attention in the moment! Exhausting and has to be seen to believe!

    • @Femininelovevibes
      @Femininelovevibes 2 роки тому +23

      Word salad

    • @sticky9129
      @sticky9129 2 роки тому +6

      Give an example? I get very anxious around people and tend to ramble my otherhalf says I don't but I feel I do.lol.

    • @creativeme6563
      @creativeme6563 2 роки тому +14

      See it all the time when a politician speaks lol.

    • @COSMICCFREQUENCY144
      @COSMICCFREQUENCY144 2 роки тому +8

      they hate any form of silence thats for sure

  • @elliesimpson1313
    @elliesimpson1313 2 роки тому +396

    Excellent. Best payback was at our daughter's wedding 15 years ago. He was there with his 3rd wife.. As I was happily dancing with our new son in law, someone heard myex narc say, "Looks like I may have made a mistake." Yeah, 19 abusive years of mistakes. It was wonderful not caring anymore.

    • @melissahoffman9433
      @melissahoffman9433 2 роки тому +32

      I’m so happy for you and your peace ❤️💪🏼❤️😊

    • @elliesimpson1313
      @elliesimpson1313 2 роки тому +14

      @@melissahoffman9433 Thank you! I so appreciate you saying that!

    • @tarottimewithandie
      @tarottimewithandie 2 роки тому +11

      ❤️❤️❤️❤️💫💫💫🌈🌈💃💃💃💃. Love it.

    • @MsPrecious61
      @MsPrecious61 2 роки тому +14

      Bravo for you! This is a very rare experience. Enjoy it.

    • @In-house444
      @In-house444 2 роки тому +9

      It’s like one of those “you think” reply moments. Lol

  • @ballerina5876
    @ballerina5876 2 роки тому +162

    His life sucked before meeting me,sucked while he was with me and sucks now that I ve gone.His life never changes due to external events.

    • @JumpWatsonYT
      @JumpWatsonYT 2 роки тому +7

      Yeap that sums em all up!! This one i had was always talking about suicide and he claimed when i broke it off that our relationship was stoppin him from it. I figured out that he unconsciously creates reasons for suicide. He purposely went out and did everything i told him would make me leave him.

    • @QueenBree_27
      @QueenBree_27 2 роки тому +4

      Period 💯

    • @MissNyPeachJerseyAppleBottom
      @MissNyPeachJerseyAppleBottom 2 роки тому +4

      Exactly I noticed this

    • @selmamilisic8000
      @selmamilisic8000 2 роки тому +1

      😱 they dont even know they have NPD. also they are dangerous when u realize who they are... my was poor and afraid of gold diggers,as the Mrs A. left him after she found out he lied ( he had kids, told her not his), also Mrs B. left him as she scares for her, and realize who is he. They always have 10 supplies at least

    • @Yathome00
      @Yathome00 Рік тому +2

      They are the “affable assholes” 😂😂 TRUTH! The ex narc never showed outward rage, he was always “happy go lucky” until the mask slipped. With me he was very careful how he communicated

  • @WhiteBirdMustFly1
    @WhiteBirdMustFly1 2 роки тому +384

    Life goes on without Me. It does, did and always will. The Narcissist finds another target, but that replacement will never be the same as with You.

    • @adriennegallotta2890
      @adriennegallotta2890 2 роки тому +11

      Agree

    • @explorer0213
      @explorer0213 2 роки тому +29

      They won't bother fuel is fuel.

    • @irenewatson
      @irenewatson 2 роки тому +19

      @@explorer0213 I tend to agree with you.We are appliances to be used and it was an affront to his dignity to have had his wife taken by a man in the SAS while he was busy hunting other prey.

    • @behramk9875
      @behramk9875 2 роки тому +5

      It never will be

    • @quazirumana
      @quazirumana 2 роки тому +4

      Yes it’s happen with me twice

  • @photosusa
    @photosusa Рік тому +42

    Living with a narcissist is so emotionally draining, there is no peace, you are constantly on eggshells and are bulied. The best thing to do is to leave them with their mental issues and fake highly important persona behind. There is no point to try to make it work, it will not. My ex did everything possible to burn that bridge for good. After 8.5 years of narcissistic abuse I regained my freedom and will not give it back to just anyone.

  • @jessrnny
    @jessrnny 2 роки тому +211

    I should write an article titled “what happens when you realize the narcissist sucks the life out of you.”
    Respectfully.

    • @tahira.k13
      @tahira.k13 2 роки тому +3

      I originally misread the title as this, so that would be interesting haha

    • @DropinNukes
      @DropinNukes 2 роки тому +1

      Mine sucked the life out of me, and not in the good way lol so I sucked the life out of her, say I’m immature but I was trapped. We lived together and I literally had nowhere else to go, dragged it out as long as I could now I’m living in a house with just one other person, about to get my license, (which she didn’t have either) it’s just strange dealing with a person like this. When I tell someone I love them I mean it. I don’t just say that to people, then again if you’re not a piece of shit it’s pretty easy for me to love a person. The fact that someone can look you in the eyes and say they love you but they don’t really mean it has got to be one of the shittiest things I’ve had the experience of going through. I think that’s one of my biggest flaws honestly, is that I give people the benefit of the doubt all the time and they always prove me right for having those feelings in the first place.

    • @monicanapier9087
      @monicanapier9087 2 роки тому +2

      No one can suck the life out of you without your consent. I played the narc back on his game!!! Then I ghost him after he became abusive! I made it my mission to stop any harm control he tried to do to me!

    • @nanaznaturalz5436
      @nanaznaturalz5436 2 роки тому

      This is the stage I’m in

    • @highpriestess9749
      @highpriestess9749 2 роки тому +1

      💯💯💯💯

  • @gibbssaunders
    @gibbssaunders 8 місяців тому +8

    Why would I even care if their life sucks without me?
    It’s my life again 👊🏽
    They’re not in my orbit & nor is it any of my business.
    Thanks for putting this information out there HG.

  • @jessicamarks5577
    @jessicamarks5577 2 роки тому +94

    The bottom line is they are miserable , they wrestle in there spirit and as they get older they age poorly because they are not right inside and it begins to show on the outside . Once you realize there nothing more then a mind fuk you begin to realize how pathetic they are . All they are is a lesson n life once u realize that the attraction is gone . I left mine and have rejected him countless times since . One word comes to mind just listening to this / pathetic .

  • @seanj11421
    @seanj11421 Рік тому +15

    Their new supply will have to eventually live up to the things you’ve done. They won’t tell you or anyone, but you’ve set the bar extremely high. They felt they could easily replace you with their good looks (probably false teeth and tons of makeup and their bodies), but when what you used to do and their new supply isn’t, reality sinks in.

  • @kelligray1848
    @kelligray1848 2 роки тому +61

    I’m hoping that he stays focused on my replacement so he leaves me alone.

  • @kikataye6293
    @kikataye6293 2 роки тому +91

    They don’t realize life sucks without us, we were all new supply at one time until they found replacements. It’s a continuous cycle 🤷🏽‍♀️

    • @Mishy555
      @Mishy555 2 роки тому +1

      So freakin true!

    • @MissNyPeachJerseyAppleBottom
      @MissNyPeachJerseyAppleBottom 2 роки тому

      They be getting they added kicked tho.. I witness a few of them.and they still try to blame you or find some one to blame

  • @jamainedingle4639
    @jamainedingle4639 2 роки тому +33

    The narc always comes back cause they destroy every relationship they have. Good supply is hard to come by

  • @ProSto7343
    @ProSto7343 2 роки тому +17

    It all seems so sweet until you realize that life would be much better without them.

  • @sirrparker3775
    @sirrparker3775 2 роки тому +127

    Life sucks every day for a Narc

  • @banderson6470
    @banderson6470 2 роки тому +104

    Life sucks with or without a source. Narcissists live in constant survival mode. Who can be happy or have peace loving like that? It’s a joke to me that a narcissist actually believes they ever win or are two steps ahead of their sources. That couldn’t be further from the truth. They are so scared and constantly protecting their false self image. That’s why many of them are paranoid.

    • @jessicasimonet923
      @jessicasimonet923 2 роки тому

      @Billie Cedillos
      You are exactly right on every word. Sounds like we've had a very similar experience.

  • @dub1951
    @dub1951 2 роки тому +83

    The point is they will get on with there life regardless and we will get on with ours but one thing for sure we have a chance of finding true love and happiness they don't, take comfort in knowing that 😊

  • @ainvencivel
    @ainvencivel 2 роки тому +94

    This is so true. My mother is a narcissist (mid-raged narcissist, the eternal victim) and she treated my father like garbage: hit him, yelled at him non-stop, humiliated him, lied about him, stole him, tried to get him fired, put people against him and then kicked him out, since she knew she would get HIS house and a fat child support. She believed he would stick around or something and when he left her life because he couldn't stand her anymore (she was literally like the devil at home) she had a mental break down, couldn't sleep, spent entire days crying. That really confused me in the past and I couldn't understand why she was apparently suffering so much. Any person who hadn't whitnessed how she treated my father would genuinelly believe she loved him and wanted to be with him. This video helped me to understand this. Small observation: my life doesn't suck without my ex. I was able to put my life back together. 4 years of no contact.

    • @lorrainestuart2154
      @lorrainestuart2154 2 роки тому +8

      Baby Breath, ignore Alexanders Easts comments, as from what you described, your mother WAS a narcisist! Aleanders.. narcs are very good at putting on the crocodile tears!
      Baby breath, sounds like your dad endured so much and that must have been painful to witness! How is he now? I hope he and you are ok. ❤️

    • @donel77642
      @donel77642 2 роки тому +3

      I think a lot of people falsely sympathize with women who sabotage their homes as "victims". Thanks for sharing the truth of what happened in your family.

    • @ainvencivel
      @ainvencivel 2 роки тому +11

      @@lorrainestuart2154 Thank you for your kind words, Lorraine. I am fine, thank you. I had to stay with my mother but ultimately fled from home at 14 and went looking for my father. I didn't know him but knew his name and where he worked. Surprise surprise: he didn't even looked surprised that I was looking for him and when I told him that if he didn't take me in I was willing to start living on the streets because I literally couldn't endure her abuse any longer. He was very happy to take me in and was an excellent father. She told me the worst things about him during the 14 years I lived with her: none of it was true. My father was the most caring, loving and nurturing person I have ever met in my entire life, with strong moral values. He cared and did this best to help everyone, even people he didn't know. He prepared me for life, was always on my side, helped me with my homework everyday (yes, really everyday), cooked our meals and split chores with me. He also spoiled me with nice things very often because my mother never got me anything. It was the first time I started wearing brand new clothes instead of the gross, stinky and worn out hand-me-downs my mother got me, he got me as many CDs, VCRs, makeup, etc as I wanted. He told me once he felt sorry for me, since my mother had isolated me from everyone and I had massive panic attacks when anyone talked to me. As soon as my mother found out I was living with him she poisoned the entire neighborhood where we were living telling everyone he was sexually molesting me and that I stayed because I enjoyed it. He had so much love inside him, was so calm, cool and collected. I try to be like him everyday. He passed 3 years ago, peacefully and happy because I had made the most out of my life so far and had a good job and overall good life. I do think he is in a better place. I have no contact with both my mother and my ex, who turned out to be just like her. They don't even know where I live. Sorry for the long reply. Take care and thank you for checking on us both, Lorraine

    • @ainvencivel
      @ainvencivel 2 роки тому +4

      @@donel77642 My thoughts exactly. Most people automatically see women as victims, especially when they put on a show, which is something narcissists love to do.

    • @lynncrf
      @lynncrf 2 роки тому +6

      @@ainvencivel Well done to you on escaping. Very inspirational. Your Dad sounds like an amazing man too.

  • @Caro_arch5801
    @Caro_arch5801 2 роки тому +98

    It’s when they say things like, who’s going to look after me, honestly believing they are complimenting you, you know it’s time to keep moving on!

    • @melissahoffman9433
      @melissahoffman9433 2 роки тому +20

      Oh yes! The covert narc I got to know wanted me to stick around taking care of him til he died. I asked him once “ and then what? “ he couldn’t answer that, he’d never thought about me at all, no consideration. It was always all about him. It blew my mind but I didn’t let it break my heart. I took my nursing and cooking skills and was ready to be homeless then stay. That was a huge valuable lesson and the beginning of my deep dive into NPD. I’m better now, stronger, more aware and rarely even think about him.

    • @cyberninjasworld
      @cyberninjasworld 2 роки тому +3

      Ex said the same when I was distracted "I thought you wold take care of me and maybe I will be the one taking care of you" all dissapointed lol

    • @alexbaird2670
      @alexbaird2670 2 роки тому +1

      This was what my covert narc MIL said when my husband and I re-located overseas. "Who's going to look after me now?".

    • @lorrainestuart2154
      @lorrainestuart2154 2 роки тому +1

      @@melissahoffman9433 well done! ❤️

    • @msdemeanour
      @msdemeanour 2 роки тому

      They always need somebody to wipe their arse properly. They are so useless 🙄

  • @MarshaAnderson-i1j
    @MarshaAnderson-i1j 4 місяці тому +6

    My ex called me to let me know the replacement wife was leaving him. I said, “oh” and he started fumbling with his words. Never heard from him again.

  • @thecountesswithpowers
    @thecountesswithpowers 2 роки тому +231

    I believe this subject right here is key to recovery...you must remember that your life is great without them!... the longer you stay away, the clearer it is that emotional thinking really messes you up. stay away, and who gives a shit if their life sucks...it will either with you or without you. Get on with your life and don't look back!!💯💣👏(I know, cuz I've gone through it!)

    • @JennyTolios
      @JennyTolios 2 роки тому +21

      Well done for getting out. 👏 I wish you all the best going forward...💖

    • @ruthanneseven
      @ruthanneseven 2 роки тому +5

      😸 Awesome!🙌
      I'm still stuck BUT: he's 500 miles away, has an intimate primary source, and she is high-maintenance.😁
      We haven't been intimate in years. He uses me to look good to others and show what a great guy he is. Were the assistance I get coming from a normal person, that would be amazing. He has determined that I'm his property.
      One thing I find very curious; when I go into a playful silly persona, child like, he acts like he's so happy and gets right into it!
      I wonder if he responds positively to this because it brings us into a time before his narcissistic personality was formed.

    • @derrickdukes2191
      @derrickdukes2191 2 роки тому +1

      🕊Datz Real🕊↗️↗️↗️🌐🌍🌐🦍

    • @ann-marieriese8038
      @ann-marieriese8038 2 роки тому +2

      Miserable baskets, they are. 😝

    • @lynncrf
      @lynncrf 2 роки тому

      @@ruthanneseven IME the only good thing about narcs is that their childishness creates moments like this. Hence why they are great fun to have as acquaintances. Totally different with IPPSs though.

  • @mandynewman8234
    @mandynewman8234 2 роки тому +9

    They were miserable any way. Nothing to do with me. I’m happier without them. That’s my win.

  • @goldilocks3593
    @goldilocks3593 2 роки тому +64

    … they move on to the next victim. Quickly. We are all interchangeable. They truly do not care at all, as long as there is an alternate toaster available.

    • @OneWhoKnowz
      @OneWhoKnowz 2 роки тому +2

      Right done toasters just work better than other s

    • @kelligray1848
      @kelligray1848 2 роки тому +9

      He’s moved on already and we aren’t even done with divorce negotiations yet but that’s perfectly fine with me. As long as he’s not looking my way, I’m more than happy.

    • @doriangrey9702
      @doriangrey9702 2 роки тому +1

      I enjoy being the dysfunctional toaster. 😁

  • @joannetier3044
    @joannetier3044 2 роки тому +36

    After 18 years facilitating a great life for my ex Narc, he can look but he will never find another me 😊

  • @genxx2724
    @genxx2724 2 роки тому +8

    They are always on the lookout and cultivating replacements instead of investing in the relationship they have. They are sick.

  • @trendeducationngo6568
    @trendeducationngo6568 2 роки тому +94

    When I realized the devaluation was beginning, I ditched the narcissist in my life before he found a new primary fuel source, but not after a good financial bleeding first. Then 8 months later he emailed to say that he was married and his wife was honeymoon pregnant with twins. It was a glorious moment of total victory. This was the fate of a tool who insisted that he would 'never marry to pay for another man's daughter or accept the burden of children.' Well, he did, and in the end, had to continue working beyond retirement age to support his 3 burdens. While I, on the other hand, successfully moved on, opening an Ltd and 2 NGOs that benefit the community. Most importantly - I have not been taken in by another 'defective humanoid type' pretending to be a genuine whole person, which is exactly what narcissists are - empty, defective humans who think they are smarter and better than the rest. What goes down, comes round, sometimes in twos!

    • @zozyb1
      @zozyb1 2 роки тому +2

      The unaware ones are cursed.

    • @lorrainestuart2154
      @lorrainestuart2154 2 роки тому +6

      @@zozyb1 they are all cursed.. unaware or not!

    • @lorrainestuart2154
      @lorrainestuart2154 2 роки тому +3

      Trend Educate.. so glad you saw the light sooner rather than later and love your term "defective humanoid type"
      Turns out you were smarter and better as you got out! Sounds like you achieved good stuff afterwards too..

    • @MissNyPeachJerseyAppleBottom
      @MissNyPeachJerseyAppleBottom 2 роки тому

      Its like a mental problem this can happen because of their past

    • @Yathome00
      @Yathome00 Рік тому

      Good job. Similar situation with my ex narc! He stated that he didn’t want kids as he already had a daughter he wouldn’t acknowledge (asshole) from a previous relationship. I told him I wasn’t the marrying kind and did not want kids so we were fine in that respect. When I dumped him he already was working on obtaining a new supply source, a girl 20 years younger. When he told me about her I wished him well and reminded him that “she’s young and will want kids” and that’s exactly what happened. He’s 56 and the child is only 5 😂😂😂

  • @GordyDeedee
    @GordyDeedee 9 днів тому +2

    Yes !! That explains it !!
    He ‘gets on the train heading straight for Sucksville’
    Too funny HG 🙏😉
    I do appreciate you breaking down the categories of narcissists
    Thank You ❤🇨🇦

  • @tamaragaines562
    @tamaragaines562 2 роки тому +32

    I was the primary the girlfriend so to speak! Me and my narc ex started off friends with benefits so to speak! We've been cool for two years and in those two years I saw things that we're off about him but his temper tantrums is what really threw me off! Ignoring all the red flags we decided to be in a relationship! I should've listened when he told me okay we relationship now I'm a totally different person! I was like what do you mean? Then he told me he was working on himself cause he could get real jealous! I didn't know what he was at the time so I was thinking well shouldn't be too much different it ain't like we haven't been together! I told him but you can't still be the player that you was either! He was all I want is you! As soon as we got in relationship everything changed! He became somebody else real quick! I was thinking we should've just kept it the way it was! I didn't know he was a narcissist! I didn't know wants we got the title everything was gone be different! He was treating me like his property! Got mad if I went out with my friends or family! We went from sex all the time to barely! He basically immediately started to devalue me once we got in a relationship! As if we weren't just perfectly fine the two years when we're just hanging out! I didn't understand it because in a normal relationship when you start off as friends things won't just switch like that when you become involved with each other! I knew something was wrong then! Been narc free for 4 months now! I discarded him!

  • @nicolejenkins2609
    @nicolejenkins2609 2 роки тому +64

    The ex was doing a fine job ruining his own life, his grandiosity caused him to overplay his hand with real estate dealings, burn the wrong people, and play chicken with state police. Completely unaware of his own self-destruction. I finally was able to get rid of him, he clung to me like the golden goose he wanted one more egg, even if he killed me to get it.
    He's in a homeless shelter in VT, but no worries, he's the king of the homeless shelter. The homeless shelter has given him a fuel matrix that is basically self-feeding.

    • @focusedonfuture3255
      @focusedonfuture3255 2 роки тому +3

      The only winning move is Nottoway play.

    • @JennyTolios
      @JennyTolios 2 роки тому +2

      Ivana....is that you? 😉😉😉

    • @mariasartzis-pellicier1723
      @mariasartzis-pellicier1723 2 роки тому +4

      NICOLE-- Your post made my day! This is THE ULTIMATE KARMA.

    • @nicolejenkins2609
      @nicolejenkins2609 2 роки тому +11

      @@mariasartzis-pellicier1723 You can still watch him being stomped down by VT troopers on UA-cam. He put it on his channel as a pity play. His driver was playing apologist for him, but yeah... since I lost my career, my house, my self-worth, most of my friends, and almost my daughter... once I got rid of him, I got all of that back. Took 2 years.

    • @zipnails
      @zipnails 2 роки тому

      Where is his UA-cam channel ?

  • @kiddytube3915
    @kiddytube3915 Рік тому +3

    The best way to put a narcissist in their place is to glow up. Move on and live your best and happy life without the narcissist.
    Show them that they don’t matter one bit.

  • @elirien4264
    @elirien4264 2 роки тому +4

    "The narc realizes life sucks without you"....I'm sorry, but all my empathy gone. Suck it up.

  • @mnelson2008
    @mnelson2008 3 місяці тому +4

    There's no there, there. They don't care about you. At all.

  • @lisaconn3432
    @lisaconn3432 2 роки тому +9

    Narcissist don't love they value! Find where u are worth more to them and they will miss what u did for them not so much you as a person but what u did for them!

  • @AkitaLover1013
    @AkitaLover1013 2 місяці тому +2

    What I noticed is a narcissist always has to one up everything you tell them. I saw this on the news etc and it was a horrible accident. They laugh then tell a more gruesome story!

  • @alimarie67
    @alimarie67 3 місяці тому +3

    My narc only missed the good lifestyle I provided him. He could have cared less about me.🤣🤣

  • @vicarofrevelwood
    @vicarofrevelwood 2 роки тому +8

    Suffering? She's not even thinking about me. But you know what, I don't think about her that much either.

  • @jmj5388
    @jmj5388 Рік тому +2

    Their stories are amusing the first 10 times you hear them, but beyond that…not so much. They love to argue, too.

  • @Em-im1yz
    @Em-im1yz 2 роки тому +20

    I laughed when he cried fake tears at that.

  • @888meenbeeby
    @888meenbeeby 10 місяців тому +2

    These are three examples of my past experiences with narcissists.
    Ex-husband has attempted hovering over the last 35 years. He pulls my autistic brother off the shelf and manipulates to his heart’s content.
    An ex-boyfriend couldn’t wait for me to leave the relationship, I was uncontrollable for him. No hover action.
    Then there was the ex-boyfriend, (an on again off again doe-see-doe) that I arbitrarily bumped into and it was like we met for the very first time. He had erased our torrid history completely away. I found that quite interesting, and no never spoke to him again.
    Three very different experiences for me.
    I am paying very close attention to your teachings and am very appreciative

  • @theblackbrazillian76
    @theblackbrazillian76 4 місяці тому

    And he makes everybody's life suck without him! Never knew what really missing someone meant but certainly knows how painful it feels!😮

  • @Confessions089
    @Confessions089 6 місяців тому +1

    Life doesn't suck without me. If he (an ex) ever told me that, I would never believe it for one second. As far as I'm concerned, he has a very happy life. So for me I will have a happy life as well. I'm not worried about an ex at all. I could really careless about any past relationship, and I'm continuing to move forward.

  • @katvond6346
    @katvond6346 2 роки тому +16

    Narcs life sucks anyway with or without us.🤣 Who cares btw how they feel.

  • @kellyfoster4763
    @kellyfoster4763 2 роки тому +39

    He will “go to town, and get on the train straight into Sucksville.” Sometimes you make me laugh so much HG, with the way you put things. 😂

  • @orlachristine4938
    @orlachristine4938 Рік тому +3

    In my experience , they don't miss you ..unless , another victim has " let them down" in their opinion. Never loved you ...as we now know ..

  • @theartzscientist8012
    @theartzscientist8012 2 роки тому +9

    I hear from his ex that all my narc did was talk about how we met and more. His guilt he has to live with! I left him. Narcs are nasty! Stay away from them…..

  • @bethwilton8075
    @bethwilton8075 Рік тому +4

    H.G.Tudor does something more important than providing the opportunity that it might suck for the narcissist: It doesn't suck for us. THAT is what really matters. Having said that I would also like to express my gratitude to you H.G..Thank you for the important insight you share.👍

  • @nickbargas7352
    @nickbargas7352 8 місяців тому +1

    Can you imagine if the narc starts to develop dementia and trying to keep all the shelves of supply in order. All that work just to feel significant from others. It's so much nicer to know your true self.

  • @taracayir7093
    @taracayir7093 3 місяці тому +2

    We've been divorced for 16 years and he's still trying to get me back. I was such a victim, but never again

  • @sarahnanna5138
    @sarahnanna5138 2 роки тому +4

    Your voice is probably the voice in the minds of ALL narcissists: Elegant, velvety, superior. You must be a narc solely based upon the sound of your own voice. How can you escape?

  • @Megz129
    @Megz129 2 роки тому +16

    HG really hates these shriveled balled midrangers😂😂😂

  • @noeleen5250
    @noeleen5250 2 роки тому +8

    I was with a man for 5 years over 20 years ago. It was emotionally draining. It is only the recent examination of HW and AH that I am beginning to realise that he was exactly what you describe. Every time I tried to take a step back he love bombed me, but when he had me, he could be cruel. 20 odd years later I am still trying to come to terms with how much he dragged me down. It took a stay in a psychiatric hospital and years in therapy to rebuild myself. My father died before Covid and as I was going through the Memorium book, his signiture jumped out at me. He had been there, but I had not seen him.

    • @fairyspunfibers9098
      @fairyspunfibers9098 Рік тому

      @Noeleen
      Oooh, girl! THAT is not a good thing that he is still keeping tabs on you! BEWARE! His signature on your father's Memorium page was a nasty, covert attempt to let you know: "I'm still watching you."
      Yikes! 😱

  • @deborahyarborough1348
    @deborahyarborough1348 2 роки тому +31

    The narcissist I broke it off with
    Acted so sad... it was a game
    and to get sympathy from his family. It was pathetic

    • @JumpWatsonYT
      @JumpWatsonYT 2 роки тому +2

      Omg that is exactly what the narc i brought up with did. He tried to look so pitiful for his entire family and i told him please stop tryin to get pity like ur a victim.

  • @MsPrecious61
    @MsPrecious61 2 роки тому +30

    The bottom line is 'who cares what the N thinks" Life is better without them!!!

  • @avril4421
    @avril4421 2 роки тому +4

    Exactly reflects my own experience. How naive of me. Discarded without any notice. I’m over it now thank goodness and I’ve not been hoovered , not for the want of him trying from time to time, following his own three times failure to replace me. He was rejected by those 3 women who are wiser than I. Thanks for all the guidance you have given.

  • @hide_and_go_sikh
    @hide_and_go_sikh 2 роки тому +3

    The Hoover is just an opportunity for me to remind you that life does suck without me. I'm glad you found someone who can finally make you happy and you're living the life that you always deserved to have. Because life with me just wasn't good enough for you. And so I have taken all of that away. You are the one in control now.

  • @JENNerationX
    @JENNerationX 2 роки тому +9

    Nutmeg’s life 🤪 will suck when Harry escapes.

  • @jeanettecook1088
    @jeanettecook1088 2 роки тому +28

    The only thing I have to say to the narc who realizes life ain't so easy without me, is :
    Hahaha Hahaha Hahaha!!!!!🤣🤣 👏👏👏🤣
    BYE!!!

  • @ianskman775
    @ianskman775 2 роки тому +12

    I'm Very impressed with your mission to understand your own thinking,If one understands his own mind and yet still chooses to act in the same way regardless of alternative paths then you have ascended beyond your own limits.I do have feeling that if you could flick a switch and be an empath for a day after 24 hrs you would revert to narcissism by choice using your own free will.Congratulations Mr Tudor.

  • @alexvrettos5565
    @alexvrettos5565 2 роки тому +18

    This is spot on you hit the nail on the head everything you have described in this is what I have experienced. You are the most thorough informative teacher.

  • @xRaverxBabyx
    @xRaverxBabyx 2 роки тому +10

    Former IPPS, I escaped, middle mid-range type A. This is my new favourite video. 🙂

    • @candycanes7581
      @candycanes7581 2 роки тому +3

      Glad you escaped. I did too 🤗… I had a middle mid range type A -a couple of times. The love bombing was over the top and the first red flag 🚩… angels with the dirty face. In my experience, they can hold the facade about 90 days on average and for me they were the hardest to detect.

  • @joanbraten71
    @joanbraten71 2 роки тому +26

    Ahhhh memories of being ensnared by a narcissist............. memories that I keep in order to recognize the next one coming along.

    • @tracyross5831
      @tracyross5831 2 роки тому

      RIGHT ON!!!! Once Bitten....TWICE SHY........ I'm VERY EXPERIENCED, in picking THESE LowLifes........ AND, I'm FREE!!!!! 👍👍👍❤️

  • @SilentMasquerade
    @SilentMasquerade 2 роки тому +25

    While listening to my Tudor, I bought the book Fuel online. See..I listen well so I can break the chains and get/ stay out of the narc-hell. Thank you.

  • @Vixinaful
    @Vixinaful 2 роки тому +13

    Nearly shat my pants with laughter when he said "He gets on the train straight to suckville" I just identified the narcissist as a middle middle range type B. That's him on the SPOT! I must admit I thought HG was a scam with all this middle upper, mega multi but okay, he nailed him to a tee. You're ahlright, Hg..You're ahlright.

    • @valerie5325
      @valerie5325 2 роки тому

      You do know , HG, is highly respected expert in this field??? And other experts and professionals in the psychology field consult with him???

  • @sharnelgezwint3990
    @sharnelgezwint3990 2 роки тому +3

    My dad is a narc.. My mother passed away recently. He cries non stop over my mother but he still refuses to come visit his own children. He kept my mother away from us when she was alive and he treated her like crap even on her sick bed. He acted sicker than her. Well now he cries non stop over her. She did everything for him. He didn't even take her out or anything. All they did was stay at home for years and she had to do everything while he slept day in and day out. She worked herself to death.. She also was very rude with us so she also a narc. It was hard to watch her be like this In her last days. My dad didn't even make her anything to eat. She had to do it herself.

  • @shawneyshoeshine
    @shawneyshoeshine 2 роки тому +10

    Man this is so incredible accurate and applicable.. It brings up so many controversial and worrying questions on what is to be done with these people.. they can't be exiled from society.. what solutions??

    • @micheleshively8557
      @micheleshively8557 2 роки тому

      Another planet where we can send them to live in sucksville together?

  • @donnaholton1981
    @donnaholton1981 2 роки тому +1

    Getting rid of the primary source I don’t care what any one thinks they do miss you. Ass a matter of fact they hate you because you no longer need them to survive that really burns their!!!!!

  • @patriciahughes4213
    @patriciahughes4213 2 роки тому +1

    The most frightening yet fascinating part of this video is the reaction of the Greater and the Ultra.
    The rest are basically predictable.

  • @heathersoper6923
    @heathersoper6923 2 місяці тому +1

    My Psychogeniic tremor is very visible, I now shake all the time, all over my body except my head.

  • @Almandarina2
    @Almandarina2 2 роки тому +4

    Yes it sucks without me because I paid for everything. He hasn't got another person to do that for him so now he knows how it feels being poor. And I could care less about his problems now. I know this because his family told me because they wanted me to take him back. Not in a million years.

  • @angelrescue100
    @angelrescue100 2 роки тому +5

    Life goes on, but the narcissist is never truly happy. They live a life out of extreme fear so always have to control, lie, and manipulate. They cannot ever have real love and affection because they don't stop violating everyone around them. which is what they really deeply are wanting. They created this super ego early in life for protection and validation. The only way to be healed and normalize is create an ego in their life that destroys their super ego. It can be done with time and hard work - or they can die early and lonely from all the stress they put on themselves.

  • @PerrySkyePhoenix
    @PerrySkyePhoenix 2 роки тому +16

    His life sucks in general, because he has bad luck (according to him) He got lucky when he met me though (unbeknownst to him) Edit: I was an IPSS/DLS, and of the shelf variety, of course. The last time that I was placed on the shelf, he "fell deeply in love" with "a girl"... and then she ghosted him. He confessed all of this to me, as I was trying to escape. He told me that he didn't care if I stayed or left. He was feeling "lost"... and he just "wanted that back." "That" not her. It sucks to be him. I told him karma's a bitch.

    • @monikakaushal5742
      @monikakaushal5742 2 роки тому +2

      You and me both are on the same boat sis

    • @HANZELVANDERLAAY
      @HANZELVANDERLAAY 2 роки тому +2

      4 narcs in a row for me...always confusion...now I know what to look for...at least....if you look in the mirror alot and say wtf ..is happening...ur probably...with a narc

    • @PerrySkyePhoenix
      @PerrySkyePhoenix 2 роки тому

      @@HANZELVANDERLAAY I've been gaslighted since birth.

    • @jimmiem9752
      @jimmiem9752 2 роки тому

      😅

  • @jackieo4980
    @jackieo4980 2 роки тому +19

    How was an appliance in my exes life. First I was the oven , then I got downgraded to being the toaster , then I just ended up being the egg timer .

    • @ruthanneseven
      @ruthanneseven 2 роки тому

      I'm in "cat rescue mode", down from Intimate partner, primary source. 😂😸

    • @PRETTYGIRLSWAGG918
      @PRETTYGIRLSWAGG918 2 роки тому

      hilarious

    • @jimmiem9752
      @jimmiem9752 2 роки тому

      I do Understand 🙏

    • @MaryAnderson-xs5wd
      @MaryAnderson-xs5wd 7 місяців тому

      I laughed when you said you went from an oven to an egg timer. I believe you have healed. Stay Blessed

  • @OneWhoKnowz
    @OneWhoKnowz 2 роки тому +5

    So life only sucks without you if you weren’t discarded! Did I hear that correctly?

    • @cm9317
      @cm9317 2 роки тому +3

      Yes, I think that's what he said. It's only if you leave them that they might feel that way

  • @jansmith6586
    @jansmith6586 2 роки тому +6

    The few times I have spoken with late husband of thirty years I had to listen to a litany of health problems! Riveting, not.

  • @remmykauffer8252
    @remmykauffer8252 2 роки тому +2

    Let me share my little story about narcissism.
    First of all, I am extremely co-dependent, masochist and i see myself a a savior/ martyr.
    My first narc was my bestfriend, perfect match for a bromance. A narc and a codependent. I went all in because i am addicted to please people. After 4 years I left him behind and wend no contact because it was becoming boring since I didn't had anything to give anymore. He never adapted to a life without me, became the joke of the town and left country. He lost his mojo after I was his main souce of supply and didnt had to work for it at all.
    Now, after 8 months of me offering a narc girl so much supply that she never ever imagine is possible since I am mentally ill myself, she begins to change and loses her mask with other people, she can't see the red lines anymore. She is starting to lose it.
    Don't fuck with a martyr.

  • @SusanaXpeace2u
    @SusanaXpeace2u 6 місяців тому +1

    I feel like I was at one point, a vulnerable narcissist like my mother, and then I had an epiphany at about 32. So @hg tudor, I find it hard to reconcile the self-awareness to acknowledge one's own narcissism with still being a narcissist. Is a self aware narcissist still a narcissist???
    I realised my problems were because I cared more about *appearing* happy than *being* happy. so I read up and cringed realising I had made resentful remarks and attempted to manipulate others. Now I try to be less basic. I want to be a better example of a human being. And I am. So am I still a narcissist? I realised I was resentful, prone to victim narratives, defensive, sensitive. I'm 53 now, still trying to have difficult conversations even when they're uncomfortable, to grow, heal, support my children, have relationships based on real connection. Obviously my mother hates this version of me. I'm a narc in her eyes. She has told me I'm detached from reality, unhappy, cold-hearted, aggressive et cetera.

    • @trevorgough2286
      @trevorgough2286 Місяць тому

      I'd say you are not a narcissist, unless you're an ultra.

  • @joannemcevoy4232
    @joannemcevoy4232 2 роки тому +21

    All good points to consider. I had different roles depending on the narcissist and whether it was romantic or friendship. I never considered the idea that life would suck without me as I figured that when it was over with the narcissist then they went on their way and that was it. I was no longer relevant. I don't miss any of those narcissists. I will reread 'Fuel' and continue reading 'No Contact'.

  • @nellythenarcissist
    @nellythenarcissist 2 місяці тому +1

    I did everything for the narcissist apart from wipe their ass! EVERYTHING. Including paying all the bills, taking care of the health, the narcissists kid and being the emotional brick. I know life sucks without me which is why they phoned me to tell me the were going to commit suicide. Desperate attempts to gain fuel back.

  • @Bo00si33
    @Bo00si33 2 роки тому +8

    Ipps. Escaped. Pressed charges. He's going to prison. Stalking and threats for the past two years. Bout to see him at trial next month. Tips? Wat could he be thinking?

    • @ladytempress3824
      @ladytempress3824 2 роки тому

      Good thing you escaped. I think Mr Tudor made a video about how to handle a Narc in court. Hopefully that will help you.

    • @tracyross5831
      @tracyross5831 2 роки тому

      He'd be thinking 🤔🤔, SHIT!!!!!🤣🤣👍

    • @BennettsShed
      @BennettsShed 2 роки тому

      Give them enough rope and they will gang themselves. Respond don’t react.

  • @rosalynjolly2565
    @rosalynjolly2565 2 роки тому +5

    Don't care about narc life is better with out grown baby.

  • @Lady2Real
    @Lady2Real 11 місяців тому +1

    Will a narc ever pretend to have a mental illness and go to the lengths of being diagnosed as bipolar? Would he also pretend so well so to pull a pants over his head and ask his mother to help put on this jersey? I truly believe my brother is a narc pretending to be mentally ill with bipolar.

  • @julieprior3126
    @julieprior3126 2 роки тому +4

    Just want to say that notifications are coming through again after whatever caused their absence. Anyone else found they've been restored?

    • @JennyTolios
      @JennyTolios 2 роки тому +2

      Mine come and go...very frustrating. Heard a rumour UA-cam "mistakenly" switches off notifications on some channels and sometimes even unsubscribes you from certain channels...

  • @jackieo4980
    @jackieo4980 2 роки тому +6

    My ex can’t even get anybody else for more than a week.

  • @cowboynohorse
    @cowboynohorse 10 місяців тому +3

    I've escaped! I'm Freeeeeeee!

  • @focusedonfuture3255
    @focusedonfuture3255 2 роки тому +5

    She knows here life sucks but it's never her fault.
    There is a song here on the tube called "Primadonna girl." It's about 15 years old and it describes a narc perfectly.
    Yes it is directed at a girl but it really just works as a narc song as it is.

    • @Cloud-ok1zw
      @Cloud-ok1zw 2 роки тому +1

      @focused on future Yeah! There's another Narc's favourite song called " Cradle" by Sub Urban. The song lyrics is all about their negetive emotions. 😂😂😂

  • @ashaleewai8735
    @ashaleewai8735 Рік тому +1

    That was incredibly useful, thanks again.

  • @fubao588
    @fubao588 2 роки тому +1

    To them, to have something is better than nothing since they live on that

  • @cm9317
    @cm9317 2 роки тому +3

    12:15 the way you matter-of-factly said that made me laugh. I've also thought that myself though 🤔

  • @frankdavf4599
    @frankdavf4599 2 роки тому +2

    Wait till the narcicism be charted properly and more and more limits and boundaries will stand between narcicists and their pray. Legal, health, educational and wichever will be achieved in time.

  • @markgreen5200
    @markgreen5200 11 місяців тому

    I played the Narc, gathered all the money she owed me first, then told her i lost my phone for five day, that drove her crazy leading to her discarding me. I then ran for my life, they think they are clever to to much. Just plan the cycle and make it work in your favour.

  • @majajovik1495
    @majajovik1495 2 роки тому +1

    Why after 4 months no contact,he stalking me,begging me and tell me i put a spell on him??despite the fact he triangulated me.Sick creatures..

  • @latikabenz6289
    @latikabenz6289 2 роки тому

    He repeats every single day that I screwing up his life. I don't think he will ever have that kind of thought, "that life sucks without me".

  • @dum.vivimus.vivamus
    @dum.vivimus.vivamus 2 роки тому +5

    Goodness, HG, thank you 🙏🌷

  • @JENNerationX
    @JENNerationX 2 роки тому

    “Life goes on ..without me…cuz iiiiiii ain’t got no Baaaaaaady” 🎶🤣

  • @karennichelson2525
    @karennichelson2525 2 роки тому +4

    Wow People = Appliance...SMH

  • @apacur
    @apacur 2 роки тому +1

    Do ever feel sorry for anyone - ever? except yourself HG?

  • @disdroid
    @disdroid Рік тому

    My partner informed me that she had a personality disorder from cluster b that could put life at risk, however she was experiencing attachment towards me which terrified her and made her a thousand times more ferocious. I made it easy for her to stay by continuosly praising her, using genuine examples of her underlying good nature which I had deciphered from her schizotypal episodes. She began coming home much more quickly, becoming bored without the freely available adulation. Then one day she shook me head and realised that she had been fuelled without expressing toxicity for over 24 hours. She then started questioning her own dynamic and sort therapy. Less than one week later, she came home laden with gifts and love for all mankind! Every part of her that I remembered from childhood was still there but hidden by her neurosis and depression. She was like a new born lamb, playful and kind but she also had an inner wisdom that hadn't shone through, until her 'reconnection'.
    All my days for that one moment!

  • @Treasurehuntingmania
    @Treasurehuntingmania 2 роки тому +9

    Everyone situation is different, if your narc is hovering you and won’t go away, then yes, life sucks without you. Please don’t take lessons from a narc, he’s only giving you what he wants to.

    • @eleawood4083
      @eleawood4083 2 роки тому +2

      Yep he makes it sound like every narracist is Teflon strong. Straight lies . Arrogance

    • @durgadevi7814
      @durgadevi7814 2 роки тому

      If you heard the video , that's what he said .

    • @eleawood4083
      @eleawood4083 2 роки тому

      @@durgadevi7814 I heard it fine this man acts as if narracist are strong they aren't. He acts as if they aren't defeatable they are. He acts as if they have it all figured out they don't. Ridiculous

  • @healthcoachtammytaylor7609
    @healthcoachtammytaylor7609 2 роки тому +2

    Hi HG! We’ve known each other for awhile now and I’m excited you’re on UA-cam now too. You helped me years ago. Not sure if you remember me, I know you have tons of followers. My question is, when others use the term Covert N which category does that fall into with yours? Thanks! Have an amazing day

  • @ruthanneseven
    @ruthanneseven 2 роки тому +5

    When you say you are the best source for information anywhere, someone might think you're exhibiting grandiosity, but that is patently FALSE.
    You ARE the best, most thorough source to be found! I love your work.
    What motivates you to do this is inconsequential, and while at first, I couldn't believe it, but I see a legacy of Agape for the world.