What Happens When the Narcissist Sees You With Someone Else?

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  • Опубліковано 7 лис 2024

КОМЕНТАРІ • 426

  • @justme-dm7sb
    @justme-dm7sb 3 роки тому +252

    "better off without them" is what every empath eventually concludes of a toxic person.

    • @hgtudor-theultra
      @hgtudor-theultra  3 роки тому +106

      That is when a point of logic is reached.

    • @cyndigooch1162
      @cyndigooch1162 3 роки тому +13

      just me That's exactly right, but it can be a lot more difficult with family members, including adult children. 😥

    • @Free2B3
      @Free2B3 3 роки тому +6

      Good point. Does it also apply when there is a son with the Narcissist? Are children better off without their Narcissistic parent too?

    • @carlacampbell3725
      @carlacampbell3725 3 роки тому

      @@cyndigooch1162 ⁰0qaqaaa

    • @carlacampbell3725
      @carlacampbell3725 3 роки тому

      @@cyndigooch1162 +

  • @kathyhansen2820
    @kathyhansen2820 3 роки тому +128

    So the narcissist is like a two year old that throws his toy away and then goes ballistic when another child picks it up. Got it. Disgusting creatures all around aren't they?

    • @VedanthB9
      @VedanthB9 2 роки тому +14

      It’s really interesting how acceptable behaviours of a child turn completely unacceptable in adulthood. To me, it seems like narcissists are still primitive (in mental development) like children and did not grow up.

    • @sugarskull2392
      @sugarskull2392 Рік тому

      Great analogy, Kathy.

    • @Plethorality
      @Plethorality Рік тому

      Toddlers, even over those over 50 years old, should not be in sexual relationships. this makes things so much simpler to extricate oneself.

    • @kidrosskidrossproductions2906
      @kidrosskidrossproductions2906 8 місяців тому

      I agree that is an excellent analogy kathy .. Thank you

    • @FrostSoul-qs6kq
      @FrostSoul-qs6kq 6 місяців тому

      Done alot of research and studies . They have a sort of cockroach mentality of leaving for a while only to come back and redo the same nonsense as before and denying them any of this behavior towards you or others can and will drive them insane like the deranged parasitic drug addict type morons they are . Regardless of intelligence and academics and other accomplishments , THIS person will go from personality disorder to full blown mental illness manifested .

  • @tiffanymccarthy9219
    @tiffanymccarthy9219 3 роки тому +158

    They don't own you,LIVE YOUR LIFE TO THE FULLEST EXTENT!

    • @SaturatedInLoveTarot
      @SaturatedInLoveTarot 3 роки тому +5

      💯

    • @cyndigooch1162
      @cyndigooch1162 3 роки тому +7

      Tiffany McCarthy That's exactly right and targets don't own them either! I'm pleased that so many young people are learning about this subject now, as it will save a lot of wasted time, which can turn into many wasted years. ❤

  • @baroquefiddle4790
    @baroquefiddle4790 3 роки тому +84

    About 3 years ago, I came to a point where I started to believe firmly "I do not want this & I do not need this." I broke free and have remained fully cutoff since. I can see how my empathy triped me into the ensnaring traps now, which led to me feeling rather foolish for a while. The biggest benefit was accepting it was never love. I went on 3 dates last year and saw very clear red flags and removed myself, I was very pleased with myself. Am still single and approaching it with caution and awareness!!

  • @orlachristine4938
    @orlachristine4938 Рік тому +11

    I had this happen to me .. showed up at my new place of work ... ignored my new partner , giving no greeting whatsoever to him . He then showed up a week later with his new supply , low hanging fruit .. to "parade" her in front of me . All of it was uncomfortable .. but hearing this ..makes it all make sense ... so so accurate .. thank you

  • @suzannemccarty6431
    @suzannemccarty6431 3 роки тому +172

    This happened to me. I was ghosted in a long term relationship with a narc after a lot of future faking was exposed. He was with new supply two days later when he blocked and in turn I blocked back. Fast forward three months later he saw me in public while I was on a date as I was trying to move on. He started raging with theatrics and crocodile tears...I keep thinking you walked out, you made the decision, you blocked me, what do you expect? Why are you so upset when you have a new girlfriend you were grooming instead of working on the relationship. It was insane to witness his meltdown when he caused the problem.

    • @HaritiniPandis
      @HaritiniPandis 3 роки тому +17

      Lol omg I’m in the beginning stages right now; I tried to dump him, it didn’t work, he did it days later and made it dramatic. I politely walked away and didn’t contact. He’s in stalking stages now for a month. I haven’t seen a meltdown yet, but heard about him asking mutual friends my whereabouts. Are u thinking of getting back with yours? I hope not!

    • @hunsbuns...
      @hunsbuns... 3 роки тому +12

      I too was wondering this. I was with the devil for 18 years and got discarded 4 months ago for God knows who he was grooming and for how long. I just didn't buy his break up speech and caught him out in the end, same as you not even a week later and when I did, he callee me a psycho and called the cops on me!! 18 years of my time and love to get cops called because you got busted? Sick coward! I guess she was very worth it! Im still in so much shock and pain learning hes was a covert narc and watching this video makes me think. Wtf? HOW can they be wounded if they see you with someone else when they had brutally discarded you for someone else? Like really? How does that even work? Like look, I haven't been on any dates im far from ready, but reading your comment makes me just think wtf? They groom someone else behind your back, ruin your life while they are living their new fake lives and then feel wounded when you move on?
      Also, YES I agree! I think the same. You easily groomed someone else and threw me out like non existent trash, but why didn't you try make us work and now you're bitter?

    • @suzannemccarty6431
      @suzannemccarty6431 3 роки тому +6

      @@HaritiniPandis nope it was a few years ago. He still stalks a few times a year by anonymously checking my LinkedIn account and hanging out with a flying monkey he never liked who lives in my neighborhood. I am in a healthy place with a healthy partner now. The stalking does creep me out a bit though. It benign but it still uncomfortable to know he is trying to mess with my head even though he supposedly has moved on....and know I have too.

    • @suzannemccarty6431
      @suzannemccarty6431 3 роки тому +14

      @@hunsbuns... Exactly! Just goes to show how truly sick and warped they really are. Perhaps they know they threw away someone who truly cared about them and they couldn’t stop themselves. Complete self- sabotage to burn the bridge where you can’t ever make it right. I can’t imagine.

    • @patty-pat-pat
      @patty-pat-pat 3 роки тому +25

      'My ex husband got New supply 4 months after the kids and I left. He has been with her for 3,5 yrs now and still rages at me for leaving. So embarrassing for her.

  • @Sneezy563
    @Sneezy563 3 роки тому +62

    And when the victim leaves the marriage the narcist then corrupts the children against their father/mother to isolate them.

    • @BinaBina221
      @BinaBina221 3 роки тому +8

      That’s why people need to stop hiding things from their children. If their father is a lying piece of 💩 don’t sugar coat things, let them know. They aren’t stupid, they sense the dis ease. Tell them the truth for their age range! Ain’t no way I would let him/her tell my children lies about me. I would have already prepared them for the bs! Then as they grow they will see who is the truth teller. Children should be made aware of familiar enemies IDC who they happen to be.

    • @kathywedzik4905
      @kathywedzik4905 3 роки тому +2

      Yea the narcissist takes the kids to hell to destroy and corrupt them, leaving you as the only viable parent. When if the kids tire of living the boring burned out lifestyle of a covert veiled narcissist, they be looking for rhe good isolated parent for guidance out of the mess.

    • @justme-xe2un
      @justme-xe2un 3 роки тому +2

      @@BinaBina221 BINGO!!

  • @7n1sun75
    @7n1sun75 3 роки тому +112

    My Narcissist Lives in the Same Apartment Building.
    He put me on the Shelve for 7 Months,
    One of the My Friends took me to The Shore, My Narcsissist Seen me Giving A Hug & Kiss afterwards in Our Parking Garage.
    He was So Wounded to No End.
    He was Done with Me, At Lease I thought, Until I Got A Car.
    He Did A 90° Turn Around. Thereafter he Came Back being Nice. He wanted to have sex again after Shelving Me for 7 months to Try to Mark what he Thinks is his Territory.
    I have No Contact, Finally walked Away, and Will be moving Soon.
    Your Videos have Help me So! 😉

    • @lopersonaleslopolitico3089
      @lopersonaleslopolitico3089 3 роки тому

      Sex is so easy to get for women, he just wants to use u, if u dnt mind sexing anyone sex something good looking and charge him, he must pay at less 1k

    • @elcee7800
      @elcee7800 3 роки тому +2

      Good going girl !!!!! He wanted to top that and you smoked him! 👏

    • @danielalvarez1121
      @danielalvarez1121 3 роки тому +1

      I think it's 180° turn

  • @bellarose6501
    @bellarose6501 3 роки тому +86

    With all the wounding they create during the so called relationship they deserve whatever they get. They live in such a sick delusional world. I would laugh in his face if he came over and said something stupid like that.

    • @hgtudor-theultra
      @hgtudor-theultra  3 роки тому +60

      You would be better served walking away, far more effective.

    • @bellarose6501
      @bellarose6501 3 роки тому +22

      @@hgtudor-theultra I hear what you are saying but in all seriousness, who does it serve better? It seems the narcissist gets their way no matter what one says or does. If one has left or been discarded and moved on and the soulless creature decides to invade your life out of nowhere because he/she is triggered thats on them. Laughing at the lies coming out of their mouth then happily walking away seems fitting.

    • @justme-dm7sb
      @justme-dm7sb 3 роки тому +9

      I know what you mean. I have done that and it caused a serious raging fit from the narc. Maybe thats what he meant. In some instances that can be really dangerous. I guess you would have to know the person and what they are capable of. Also a person with nothing to lose is very dangerous. If they have something they fear losing or fear trouble with the law, have at it ! I will laugh with you.

    • @rocksoft1236
      @rocksoft1236 3 роки тому +12

      @@bellarose6501 by not giving any response as if they doesn't matter will hurt their wounded ego more.

    • @charissa6648
      @charissa6648 2 роки тому +1

      @@bellarose6501 Any form of vengeance or justice you attempt to enact will be futile, because they don't care like you do. You will never best them, because they lack empathy/compassion, and you would have to become like them in order to even the playing field; which is a horrible idea.
      You will heal from that mindset and I believe it is apart of the grieving, the anger, and realizing how badly you were mistreated! How much damage was done.
      I lost everything, but gained peace and hope. He tried to ruin my reputation and eventually that became freeing for me. I don't care what he thinks because he knows what he did; he does not need to validate reality to me.
      I would think if only he understood how I felt....lol yeah, that was a trap for me. It never mattered, because he didn't care.

  • @DM-gb9xq
    @DM-gb9xq 2 роки тому +17

    Mine saw me at the grocery store 3 weeks after we broke up tonight. I was with a guy friend but looked like date. My ex narc stopped, turned to make sure I saw him then gave me a nasty horrific look and then walked out. Before I could got out to the car, he had emailed me twice b/c I have him blocked via text. He sent me one compliment to let me know he saw me. Then he sent me one telling me his sick father had died. He knows I would want to respond to the one about his father but I'm not...I can't help him. He was at the store getting alcohol and he is supposed to be in recovery.. but he goes to AA meetings then goes by store to get alcohol. It's quite the charade. I'm done with his fake reality, lies and games. I did not respond.

    • @empress9857
      @empress9857 2 роки тому +4

      🎯 he tried to bait you in he failed 💪🏾

    • @Em-im1yz
      @Em-im1yz Рік тому +1

      I wonder how many are addicts

  • @painting40
    @painting40 3 роки тому +82

    HG, the most powerful part of your videos for the empath, is to finally not feel like it is personal. You go through your whole life, from one narc to the next, and you cant put the pieces together. As an empath, you cant figure out why you attract this over and over, and it always presents differently, but ends up just being a different level of narcissism. I believe I have been with almost every kind....including a psychopath and an upper range narcissist. I am glad I am alive, and can now understand what it all was and is. And now i understand why it is so difficult to end relationships with these people if you try to be nice and get closure. I am now realizing I am surrounded...family, friends, lovers, followers, and an almost ex husband. Thank you for sharing invaluable information for what has occured my entire life.

    • @ravenraven966
      @ravenraven966 3 роки тому +14

      Mara, you just told my story.Sometimes I wonder why do all the narcs surround me. I truly think there are that many. People with kind empathic traits are rare in this world. It is mindbowing.

    • @cobracrew1986
      @cobracrew1986 3 роки тому +3

      It starts with family. That passive agressive behaviour becomes normalized and the Narc unconcioussly thinks it's interesting their ways of trying to make you react do not work as efficiently as usual.

    • @WhiteBirdMustFly1
      @WhiteBirdMustFly1 3 роки тому +2

      These psychopaths All read people like a book. Think about it. Their love is a FACADE, they cannot give what they do not have for themself. LOVE, doesn't compute.

    • @a.hajarv.7547
      @a.hajarv.7547 3 роки тому +1

      Same here!!

    • @samanthahadwin
      @samanthahadwin 2 роки тому +1

      I’ve also been with all the colours of the narcissist. I have built boundaries and keep my eyes wide open!!

  • @mariasartzis-pellicier1723
    @mariasartzis-pellicier1723 3 роки тому +36

    My EXTREME COVERT MALIGNANT soon to be EX-husband emailed just yesterday, that he will kill anyone he sees me with, even after divorcing. He actually said that I BELONG to HIM, no matter what.
    I think I'm going to have a problem. But thank God, I have PROOF of what he said/thinks

    • @zr9145
      @zr9145 3 роки тому +12

      I hope you’ve taken that email to the police..?

    • @Anna_Banana123
      @Anna_Banana123 3 роки тому +4

      Document everything he does!

    • @warangel4389
      @warangel4389 2 роки тому +4

      Get a restraining order!!

    • @SootSootSooty
      @SootSootSooty 2 роки тому +4

      Get security cameras. And don’t take that lightly. Even if you think you know what that person is capable of, it’s not worth the risk that you could be mistaken. Have a new address where you can’t be found and new number, then take that to the police and DO get a restraining order. Then disappear.
      Normal, sane, SAFE people to be interacting with, do NOT communicate like that.
      Please take your safety very, very seriously. 🙏 Please don’t shrug it off. X

    • @lucyevans5428
      @lucyevans5428 6 місяців тому

      Get a restraining order on him via the courts , you are at risk , they are bat shit crazy when they loose control . Get camera doorbell and make a diary of dates / times etc plus keep any emails / voicemails / texts etc . Get your phone checked by a pro or a garage for checking for tracking devices in your car .

  • @chrish2277
    @chrish2277 3 роки тому +40

    Couldn't go no contact with my ex as we shared children. We did go low contact and I had court orders drawn up so that the only contact was in writing (letters or texts). Best thing I ever did.

    • @theinfamousjunebugg
      @theinfamousjunebugg 2 роки тому +1

      How did it work for you as I share a 2 year old son with my narcissist ex smh 🤷‍♂️

  • @filsed
    @filsed 3 роки тому +22

    Thank you HG. I will not let my narc to kill my new relationship. She is persona non grata.

  • @30lacieful
    @30lacieful 3 роки тому +53

    I’m so glad you’re debunking all the lies. Go after then HG. These you tubers are making money and getting popular off of lack of knowledge of lies. Go after all of the lies and I’ll makes sure others know the truth too.

    • @hgtudor-theultra
      @hgtudor-theultra  3 роки тому +33

      Fucking A!

    • @candycanes7581
      @candycanes7581 3 роки тому +2

      HG Tudor - Knowing The Narcissist : Ultra -
      Fuck a B, it has 2 holes, more fuel.
      Logical thinking 🤔

    • @BennettsShed
      @BennettsShed 3 роки тому +3

      As soon as I am free of mine I will be going into overdrive and sharing the shit out of these videos.

    • @elcee7800
      @elcee7800 3 роки тому +9

      @@BennettsShed : Please don’t share them with narcs, it will make them better at what they do.

    • @ioanaanaoi8232
      @ioanaanaoi8232 3 роки тому +4

      @@elcee7800 unlikely that these videos will make narcs better at what they do.
      The lower and middrangers cannot stand to watch because first and foremost they perceive these videos as criticism.
      The upper and ultra that would be interested , are very few. Most of them have already these knowledges and are applying it

  • @violetlight8138
    @violetlight8138 3 роки тому +21

    Oh Yey! I did it today. He’s a British guy and I’m an American. He discarded me a few weeks ago. Then I realized I was dealing with a narcissist and got over him. As I was deleting naked pictures I had of him today he sends me a message. I know he has wanted to connect with someone during Covid but hasn’t. I have just yesterday! 😍 he’s a fabulous non-narcissist (I’m always looking for flags though just in case) the narcissist wanted to know how I was. I told him I was working on a relationship with someone and hoped he had found someone. I am sure it wounded him. He hasn’t messaged me back. He’s an upper midrange I think or maybe even an elite.

  • @daniaroundtheworld1357
    @daniaroundtheworld1357 3 роки тому +17

    The sob actually came to my table while I was on a date acting all friendly like nothing ever happened after abandoning me at the worst time possible, because he knew that seeing him would crush me, Mission accomplished. He then hoovered me back a couple of months later. Only to discard me again. Turned me into secondary source a month after he disengaging and kept telling me things about her, things I would have love to hear myself from him, because he knew it would hurt me, and still making it sound like it was ok to still sleep with me, because she was just occasional dating. I have to give it to them, these people are good at what they do. Time to say good bye.

  • @adriennegallotta2890
    @adriennegallotta2890 3 роки тому +112

    No dating . Get better Get strong . No fornication. One husband one wife so that no one burns. otherwise be a servant of God which I am this is how I'm living my life today

    • @YoNeener
      @YoNeener 3 роки тому +8

      This is sick.

    • @margaretrefile8207
      @margaretrefile8207 3 роки тому +1

      Yep

    • @lizabella4885
      @lizabella4885 3 роки тому +11

      That's what I'm doing,.. Healing,.. And alone with god🙏🏻... It's a long journey💐

    • @egyptnz27
      @egyptnz27 3 роки тому

      @@kyleryandalton1383 😝😝😝😝scaryyyy.....😱😲🙄🙄😜😝😝😝😝😝😝😝🤩

    • @KB-by3vl
      @KB-by3vl 3 роки тому +1

      I can't see God leaving Daniel in the 🦁 Lion's Den. So, why would that kind of God leave a man or woman ensnared in a marriage that may be emotionally abusive? Is God to be Mistaken as Cruel and Disturbed?

  • @irenebuford8930
    @irenebuford8930 3 роки тому +28

    As you stated the narcissist is wounded when the victim is with someone else, however many narcissist do a lot of wounding to others as well.. It is sad when all human beings are wounded... Thank you for sharing how the narcissist feels... Some narcissist will also win you back only to treat you like crap.. I pray that when I am with someone else at some point that I do not see the narcissist out.. Great video...

    • @entertainmenttv1657
      @entertainmenttv1657 3 роки тому +3

      U just described my ex...he will hoover you back just to treat u worse than he did before & then he will ghost u...I am always confused of how sick this could...like what's the point? Its so childish

  • @cyndigooch1162
    @cyndigooch1162 3 роки тому +17

    I'm pleased to inform you that I really don't care now and my last narcissistic ex lives in another state in Australia anyway! He's a free and single person, so he's allowed to go out with others, which he easily gets. I've heard about a couple and felt for them. I haven't gone out with anyone in the four and a half years since I told him to leave my home because I haven't been looking. ❤

    • @traceybiles2061
      @traceybiles2061 Рік тому +1

      Being alone is better ...we take time to heal and never had a harem garage.

  • @irenebuford8930
    @irenebuford8930 3 роки тому +39

    Good job on saying the brainwashed new victim, you could not have worded it any better...

  • @ScorpionPrincess1989
    @ScorpionPrincess1989 3 роки тому +5

    Me to the narcissist “words are wasted on you” and that really ‘triggered’ him!

  • @oregonwildboy
    @oregonwildboy 2 роки тому +9

    The best way to get over someone is to get under someone new. That's what my ex wife a diagnosed vulnerable narcissist, used to say. My god, I have to be honest what an exciting lot to deal with.

  • @mjhstyl5364
    @mjhstyl5364 3 роки тому +95

    Dang being a Narc is not an easy life❗️

    • @tiffanymccarthy9219
      @tiffanymccarthy9219 3 роки тому +19

      Can you imagine LIVING like this every day.

    • @hrumi8748
      @hrumi8748 3 роки тому +5

      🤣

    • @entertainmenttv1657
      @entertainmenttv1657 3 роки тому +22

      Its so freaking stressful...too bad they will never know what its like to live freely & enjoy the peace of mind that comes with not putting anyone in mind 24/7...imagine them being too sensitive & putting every single one of their supplies in mind every second of the day? Its a hard narc life 🤣🤣

    • @Aprils23
      @Aprils23 3 роки тому +9

      @@entertainmenttv1657 😩😭😭😭 Hard narc life😂😂👏🏾

    • @blacky8030
      @blacky8030 3 роки тому +1

      For real!!!

  • @davewelbylivinginhistinyti4796
    @davewelbylivinginhistinyti4796 3 роки тому +27

    I just want to thank you, I've been watching your videos for about a week, sometimes watching 3 or 4 a day, and I've learned more from you than I have in two years with others claiming to be codependents or empathetic people, (which l believe are more than likely to be narcissists). I believe that you would say, "well, that's normal" very generous of you, even if it's to make a living out of it. Thanks. Namaste🙏

    • @rtgriff77
      @rtgriff77 3 роки тому +3

      That’s why he is “The Ultra” ❤️❤️

  • @hunsbuns...
    @hunsbuns... 3 роки тому +11

    Why would they get 'wounded' and if they had already left you after 18 years for someone else anyway? They have their supply and you haven't heard from them since they discarded you so brutally, they could care less! They got to wound every single part of our soul!

  • @xLoVeKiLlS2829x
    @xLoVeKiLlS2829x 3 роки тому +8

    Whenever my ex(he's an abusive narcissistic, sociopath with psychopathic tendencies) sees or thinks I'm with someone else, he loses his ever loving mind. Even if it's just a friend & he knows it's just a friend.
    Even though he's in a relationship (his gf is a narcissist & stalks me, they both do.)

  • @irenebuford8930
    @irenebuford8930 3 роки тому +72

    A thought just crossed my mind HG, what about doing a video on a mid range narcissist that is always seen out in public alone even though the narcissist may have more than one fuel source that he is never seen out in public with... A mid range narcissist that mostly keeps his sources hidden by them going to his home or the narcissist periodically visiting the victims homes... Thanks...

    • @refreshingAnd
      @refreshingAnd 3 роки тому +20

      Are you in my city? Do you know the guy I was seeing?! lol 😳

    • @gb2556
      @gb2556 3 роки тому +15

      Sounds like the person I met. 🥸🤓 they are so pathetic!

    • @lillianpitts9853
      @lillianpitts9853 3 роки тому +9

      Sounds like my soon to be ex husband also

    • @ang3956
      @ang3956 3 роки тому +10

      Spot on! Thats exactly how my ex behaves

    • @ginab540
      @ginab540 3 роки тому +3

      Following

  • @sumbals
    @sumbals 3 роки тому +18

    That i agree wounds them like hell as personal experience mine wouldn’t even allow me to talk to anybody even me being with him that is how much he was controlling and insecure

    • @jimdaniel4412
      @jimdaniel4412 3 роки тому +1

      Yep..my breakup was attention..if i talked to or seen anyone..it wasnt about her..i never ignored..but was not allowed to give attention anywhere else..

  • @MariaCeaMIca
    @MariaCeaMIca 3 роки тому +5

    I showed up at an event with a new girlfriend (NOT a romantic partner, just a girlfriend I had met through a bereavement support group). My ex narc came over to us & proceeded to be “Mr Charming”. I was very perplexed by this behavior at the time. I now understand it was a Hoover. How DARE I have a new friend! He must have been extremely wounded & jealous of her. There was a lull in the conversation. Then, all of a sudden, he turned & walked away VERY QUICKLY. That was sooo odd. Perhaps he felt his rage coming on & he didn’t want to blow up in front of me & uncover his cool, “Mr Charming” facade. It was a VERY BIZARRE exchange. How can anyone have so much ego-centric self love!?! SICK! (I never bothered to tell my girlfriend that he was my ex boyfriend; I think because I was so confused by the whole incident, until now.)

  • @humanrel
    @humanrel 3 роки тому +21

    I love this audio. So much information and you covered a lot. I discovered that someone I know is a mid range narc. It's so beautiful the way that you dissect thought patterns.

  • @rebeccajohnson5658
    @rebeccajohnson5658 2 роки тому +4

    Narcissist is a player. When the Narcissist's ex gets a new love interest the Narcissist gets mad and jealous,and feels abandoned.

  • @queenofhearts1138
    @queenofhearts1138 2 роки тому +4

    I had stopped listening to you bc... I felt free of the narc. No contact for 6+ mo. But all of a sudden... The pangs of loneliness hit... And I went secretly stalking their fb. And I thought. I'd better get back to H.G. before I fkn relapse. Perhaps I already have. Either way. Thank you HG.
    Your voice... Truly is enchanting... It is MARVELOUS.

  • @GrumpyMeow-Meow
    @GrumpyMeow-Meow 2 роки тому +3

    They don’t think like you. It’s all about them. Everyone loves them, everyone needs them, don’t you know? When you contradict that, they go nuts.

  • @Free2B3
    @Free2B3 3 роки тому +6

    When Narcissistic xhusband 'felt' there could be someone new in my life, first thing he said that if I get married he will take our son and I will never see him again. When he was the one who cheated, divorced and left us out in the cold. Hell, he didnt even bother to put any effort into seeing our 3yo son for the first time! The audacity and entitlement these narcs think they have to control our life🤨

  • @carolbanks960
    @carolbanks960 3 роки тому +13

    Isn't the narcissist just a fancy word for demon????

    • @hgtudor-theultra
      @hgtudor-theultra  3 роки тому +1

      No

    • @babygrandma8654
      @babygrandma8654 3 роки тому

      Carol, you can rid a person of a demon through an exorcism but you cannot remove the narcissism from a narcissist by any means.

    • @deeva57
      @deeva57 3 роки тому

      @Carol Banks, lol. Cheers. 🍻

    • @maribby_xo5183
      @maribby_xo5183 3 роки тому

      😂

  • @joycefiore2721
    @joycefiore2721 8 місяців тому +1

    Thanks HG!!

  • @shoneeznaidoo111
    @shoneeznaidoo111 3 роки тому +5

    Every word you mentioned described the ex narcissist reaction. You a well of knowledge.

  • @SB-vg7jk
    @SB-vg7jk 3 роки тому +8

    My ex (malignant) narcissist told me when I get a new man he will hunt him and his family down and wipe them out. Even 10 months after we broke up. Because we share a child together. He has always told and threatened me saying "mark my words I will destroy him".
    I won't let him know who I'm with. I have to keep my life private in that area. I've got a protection order and moved to where he doesn't know where I am now.

    • @narcfreebabyGi
      @narcfreebabyGi 2 роки тому +2

      I have dealt with also he has threatened my whole family they have real mental issues it's sad🙏🙏

  • @monicacordelia9545
    @monicacordelia9545 3 роки тому +8

    HG, when you mentioned; “Trading Up” it stands out to me.
    My ex-narcissist was my friend (so I thought) for 6 years, when I was filing for divorce from my husband at the time the narcissist said; “sometimes it’s just time to trade up”... it all makes sense now! Thank you!

  • @PrarieWarrior
    @PrarieWarrior 3 роки тому +8

    This is exactly the games they play.

  • @leilasmama01
    @leilasmama01 3 роки тому +6

    This made me giggle 🤭 😂. Ryan gosling LOL
    State of narcdom 🤣

    • @entertainmenttv1657
      @entertainmenttv1657 3 роки тому

      I laughed so hard at it...I dunno why but its so damn funny 🤣🤣

  • @elvaldes2072
    @elvaldes2072 Рік тому +1

    The messy state of the narcissist's former source should be a red beacon of warning to the new one.

  • @pattyflanders8021
    @pattyflanders8021 3 роки тому +12

    Narc yelled across the store, "Hey douchebag'"...looking right at me, (in the small town where I grew up and everyone knew me).

    • @hgtudor-theultra
      @hgtudor-theultra  3 роки тому +34

      Just tell yourself he was looking in the mirror. Regards to Ned.

    • @babygrandma8654
      @babygrandma8654 3 роки тому

      @@hgtudor-theultra 🤣😂

  • @robertogustafsson1231
    @robertogustafsson1231 3 роки тому +4

    letting them see new pipeline going elsewere or ewen worse, to us while ignoring them hurts them the most.

  • @mine176p
    @mine176p 3 роки тому +13

    Guessing he's not going to like it, so what. Too bad so sad, he threw that right away when he left the last time- I was wondering why he came by the last couple of times, thought he would have found that note i put in his stuff laying it all out- I know he texted his friends gf saying i was messing with him- got mad when I gone longer than he thought I should have been- "what's she out doing that would take three hours?" But I've also heard we "weren't dating" and there "wasn't anything going on between us, i know i don't matter, probably never did, e was LIVING WITH ME- seriously😠

  • @chiara223
    @chiara223 3 роки тому +43

    “Bury me in a Y-shaped coffin” 😂 using that one.

  • @sanityisrare
    @sanityisrare 3 роки тому +2

    I like the way thw narrative is made as the narc is speaking directly

  • @mysticme777
    @mysticme777 3 роки тому +14

    Attempting to hoover me several times by unknown numbers and by proxy without success after a photo of mine with a man in my social media, after my escape...

  • @benchilders1183
    @benchilders1183 3 роки тому +25

    What happens to the narcissist when you get in great physical shape and are happier without them after the discard?

    • @mammabear4334
      @mammabear4334 3 роки тому +12

      Their head spins and steam start's to escape from their ears 😁

    • @user-oi5wm1od2k
      @user-oi5wm1od2k 3 роки тому +14

      They come back n try again..

  • @joyfulme6923
    @joyfulme6923 3 роки тому +5

    I have NO DESIRE FOR A SUPPLY i do me and love it

    • @av8r516
      @av8r516 3 роки тому

      Are you a narc?

  • @joannemcevoy4232
    @joannemcevoy4232 3 роки тому +11

    I don't see why the narcissist would care. They ran off with whoever so why should it be of any consequence.

    • @angelmason23
      @angelmason23 3 роки тому +9

      They don’t care about the new relationship you’re giving what they believe is their fuel to someone who isn’t them

    • @jimdaniel4412
      @jimdaniel4412 3 роки тому +19

      Umm..i dont want you right now but stay on shelf just in case..its a control thing

    • @hgtudor-theultra
      @hgtudor-theultra  3 роки тому +9

      For the reasons explained in the video, JM.

    • @joannemcevoy4232
      @joannemcevoy4232 3 роки тому +1

      @@hgtudor-theultra I understand the point in the video you are making, that the narcissist would be wounded by seeing the previous victim with a new partner and how that may play out. I guess I am looking at it from the notion that the previous partner would be considered to be 'persona non grata', so as to negate any relevance to the narcissist. I am still grasping such a concept evidently.

  • @abigailg.8760
    @abigailg.8760 3 роки тому +4

    HG! Look at you with a little bit of a sense of humor. Thanks for the all the insight.

  • @dianaalyssa8726
    @dianaalyssa8726 Рік тому

    Great one to revisit. I've not bothered finding a replacement narcissist for my narcissist.

  • @sallydaly5597
    @sallydaly5597 10 місяців тому

    Supposed is a serious man who will confront the narcissist and knock out the narcissist.

  • @nappyfries
    @nappyfries 2 роки тому +3

    Years after my ex and I split up & he had a gf since we broke up, he found out who I was talking to and had so much to say about it. He was so jealous even after we hadn’t been together for years. It’s been 5 years since we split up & we started talking again for our child. It makes me wonder if he’ll do all that again soon. I don’t want to bring anyone around him.

  • @janahutchins4684
    @janahutchins4684 2 роки тому +1

    Providing much frustration to a used and thrown away narcissistic can provide pleasure for decades.... still grinning after 25 years.

  • @noelcummins9712
    @noelcummins9712 Рік тому

    I understand the first two.assertions of control.
    To me the third, that of withdrawal, the least favourable as you put it, is in fact a cop out.
    The narc has lost and slinks away, whilst the empath has (hopefully) moved on with another empath.

  • @rocknrollbuff
    @rocknrollbuff 3 роки тому +1

    A clever talk ,
    I like his posh voice understands the profranities yes are required when describing , a person that you have lost trust and therefore they have a strange sense of entitlement, please continue with profanities they make it fun ,
    Kindest regards
    Jeremiah

  • @rosemaryrogers1478
    @rosemaryrogers1478 2 роки тому +2

    I know you be serious in your delivery but you have me cracking up at times...funny..they are not the colossist they think

  • @Bintang221
    @Bintang221 3 роки тому +4

    When he saw me with someone else...well he followed me for months. Then one day he appeared below the house of my then new bf. He had waited for hours for us to come out of that house. He then went to that ex bf's shop to speak to him directly.
    During the time I was with the other...he always wrote. I NEVER replied. After I left the other...I know he still follows me. He sends gifts, sends mails, etc...
    All this after more than 2 years.

  • @tiggiestigg546
    @tiggiestigg546 2 роки тому +2

    I'd be careful of this. It's come to me on good authority that my ex still fears me getting with someone else. He even managed to deceive one of his supplies into contacting me. She actually thought he'd ended it with her because of me! It's was a trap. I knew he'd lead her into contacting me as a sideway attempt of finding out if I was seeing anyone. Elaborate but games is his thing. I've been careful not to mention either way. He doesn't need me he's involved with others. His reasons can only be sinister. Now I could be wrong but my senses tell me, he's hoping I am seeing someone. It's almost as if he needs a trigger, some weird guilt trip hoover or point scoring game of some such. Narcs don't like people touching their toys but sometimes they like being challenged this way. Plus they can slut shame, attempt to vindicate themselves by insisting you must've already been seeing whoever prior to leaving. They'd also rather you left them for another than face the fact they were shit. Rather be single hurts their ego. I struck back by finding his long term ex, snap shotting her recent wedding pics and had them sent to him. I'm certain his exes and side pieces are Narcs of differing levels so I'm not overly concerned about throwing the dogs stick towards another target. I'm certain I wounded him. Laughing at him is most certainly the best defence

  • @humanrel
    @humanrel 3 роки тому +2

    Very good insight. Thanks for taking the time to create.

  • @fatetwisted8825
    @fatetwisted8825 3 роки тому +14

    HG Thank YOU for this video. I LOVE IT. Yay me I scored another point.....I pulled the social media new couple scenario within 7 days after break up. Slam dunk! I highly recommend it but my narcie had fury so be careful he attacked me called me a whore on my page. He didn't even mention the new supply! You were spot on HG!!! After that I blocked him hahahaha! ... Gosh, today is a great day for me. It doesn't take that much to make me happy :) I may rewatch this one several times just to make me feel better and listen to welcome to the jungle by gnr.

  • @Blitzy279
    @Blitzy279 2 роки тому +1

    In the end, it is your own self that after dealing with such a toxic pressure will become immune of it, and your mind and soul will know how to deal with this and teach you with the guide of intuition. This leads us to become much more mature and is a bad part and a good part about it. We have lost our last parts of innocence but now we are mentally prepared to deal with this type of people. The best thing is to wear your boundaries proud and up, like a beautiful and very expensive purse✨🤣

  • @thewatchman9207
    @thewatchman9207 3 роки тому +2

    If my ex narcissist should make a phone call to devalue me which I know that he will not do, he was forewarned during the breakup every time I found out that he spoke bad of me to anyone I would release a portion of his secret to the ones he valued and loved. She no longer has any power because I used to be the ultimate narcissic female, this was before he and I had ever met. I had turned away from that life, until I realized that it was trying to destroy me. I am the ultimate empath! And you do not get to walk away from me like you've done with all the others.

  • @Andypandieful
    @Andypandieful 3 роки тому +2

    I bolted out of state. Almost completely on the opposite side of the US.

  • @thewatchman9207
    @thewatchman9207 3 роки тому +4

    Every single thing that you have said thus far and I am 15 minutes into your video is true as to the mind of the narcissist one thing that I hold as an ace of spades is the fact that I know my ex narcissist is gay, secretly gay. He will do anything and everything to maintain that secret. If I should encounter him in a situation where he is with someone else and tries to flaunt her in my face! I will then proceed to laugh so hard and so loud until tears come out of my eyes as I shake my head and look her in the eyes and say good luck with that one. I do not think that he wants the new supply to even have the thought that he may be homosexual so he runs from me he hides in the shadows because of me. I know where he is and what he is doing at all times and that is the way it needs to be, if that's what it takes to keep him from intervening in any area and anything in my life. Okay now back to the video.

  • @charmekiawhite3633
    @charmekiawhite3633 3 роки тому +3

    "Insults combined with the degree of pity play" these creatures are real demons.

  • @ntombifuthiyika5975
    @ntombifuthiyika5975 3 роки тому +4

    The warning " At your own risk."

  • @slestage5725
    @slestage5725 3 роки тому +3

    Wow perfect timing as always. I am just getting to know someone new and the narc lives across the street from me. Its been nine months nc but he has had his ex before me spending the night fairly often so, I hope this means he wont bother me after seeing me have a male visitor during the day time.

  • @rebeccajohnson5658
    @rebeccajohnson5658 2 роки тому +2

    Narcissist is feeling of resentment when the ex gets a new love interest.

  • @aNnAkt1qw
    @aNnAkt1qw 3 роки тому +7

    i have bought several of your books HG, they are not for the faint-hearted. i have followed you for a year. You can be triggering to say the least but i have turned this round and gone inside to feel those wounds impaled...... i have had so many questions answered. Always searching, this lead me to know who i am and why. Am almost there. Thank you 💜

    • @michellebarnett5154
      @michellebarnett5154 3 роки тому +1

      I AGREE 💯
      He has helped me more than any other page one here, i discovered him about 4 years ago....if i hadn't, i wouldn't have overcome as much nor had any understanding of anything n yhis twisted dynamic. THANK YOU HG 💜💫💫👍👍💥💥

  • @josephmay447
    @josephmay447 3 роки тому +8

    Y shaped coffin, that's fucking brilliant! 🤣😂🤣😂

  • @memphisjuju3361
    @memphisjuju3361 3 роки тому +6

    I left my narc ex 5 months ago. I’ve seen her about 9/10 times since because we live in the same area. Every time I’ve seen her she gives me a mean look like she is disgusted with me. When she sees me and is with her sister they both would harrass me. But for some reason when I saw her today she smiled at me and said hi how are u, I didn’t respond. COULD SOME ONE TELL ME WHAT IS GOIN ON 👀

  • @officialcherry730
    @officialcherry730 2 роки тому

    This is true... Left the narc 3yrs ago and have been dating someone new for 2yrs, just made it official 5 months ago and now the narc hoover him more than he Hoover me! When he come pick up the kids and see us together, he wait until I go inside to say something slick to him.. My guy knows what he's fealing with so he never get a response but the guy just refuse to let it go!.. And it doesn't matter that he have new supplies neither😩

  • @7n1sun75
    @7n1sun75 3 роки тому +7

    My Last Encounter with the Narcsissit was Me Telling Him, I Knew Who is Was and Is. He was So Wounded that he's Now Avoiding Me.
    He No Longer Parks in Front Of My Window Anymore, and He Avoid Me At All Cost. I Told him, I am A Supper Empath. 👍🏻

  • @justme-dm7sb
    @justme-dm7sb 3 роки тому +11

    So I am curious what happens to them when we see them with someone else and honestly don't care, wish them well and move along. Not that they would know we are or are not an item with another person, only that we don't care anything about them or what they are doing. That we are happy with our lives no matter what our own situation because it no longer includes their abuse. I always tend to feel a little bad for whoever is the next victim of my ex while at the same time don't concern myself with it becauae they have their own lessons to learn in life. Any thoughts?

  • @michellemcgill9328
    @michellemcgill9328 3 роки тому +6

    My Fiancé’s Narc ex tried to warn me 😂

  • @YukonFox1972
    @YukonFox1972 3 роки тому +7

    HG, what about the narcissist who bluntly states he wants a casual sexual relationship and actually WANTS the partner to be involved with someone else because he knows he can’t provide what the empath needs emotionally? He wants to be free to be with whomever he wants. I believe he is a Greater. He has admitted that he’s probably a psychopath (muted emotions, not interested in love but wants sex).

  • @angelnocharlie
    @angelnocharlie 3 роки тому +2

    You can always forget the narcs birthday and see how they send a 11pm text to inform you it is their birthday so you apologise for forgetting then the narc will ask for naked pics as they have put you on the backfoot so they are in control also talked of getting married which I thought strange at the time! Then they will say they will see you tomorrow but don’t as further control no texts from then on as they have disengaged you for disrespecting their magnanimous birth! 🤣 It was all rather puzzling behaviour as I was emotionally invested but now I see it for what it was. My second narc experience the first was covert this last one malignant, both lovebombed me at the start when I think of it so that will be a big red flag 🚩 in future. I’m grateful it was only a couple of months of my life wasted on each narc, once you know you never go back to them. Only time shows the pattern of their behaviour they really do think they are superior to you and try to break you down as some sort of worshipping slave to their ego!

    • @jra7586
      @jra7586 3 роки тому

      Hello there I'm sorry that happened to you. I had a female Narc destroy me because of her Narc boyfriend the worst kind! Hit me up so we can chat ok Im curious about this whole Narc thing I'm really intreagued

  • @alisonnonumber
    @alisonnonumber 3 роки тому

    God, you make me smile HG : )
    I'm loving your information, thankyou.

  • @carolutley6523
    @carolutley6523 3 роки тому +1

    Thanks HG for teaching me some new potty words. 😏

  • @mysticme777
    @mysticme777 3 роки тому +2

    I've been waiting for this video... Thx HG 💖

  • @JessicaRamirez91622
    @JessicaRamirez91622 3 роки тому +2

    He would have a gf, sleepin with however many women and still be mad I was with one guy. Was always so crazy to me

  • @rosemaryrogers1478
    @rosemaryrogers1478 2 роки тому +2

    How they gone be mad when they ignore you and is with somebody else?? How???? And why?

  • @ksmax6310
    @ksmax6310 Рік тому

    I am glad they feel wounded 😄 they deserve it. When I saw the ex and we were both with new partners he looked directly at me and just smiled broadly. Creep I just completely ignored him

  • @martinheath5947
    @martinheath5947 3 роки тому +2

    After I moved on, the first hoover in earnest was the most deadly

  • @lucyevans5428
    @lucyevans5428 6 місяців тому

    Some narcs never give any info about their exes so you can’t connect with them when it’s over to discuss the narc , and I am sure narcs use the same words to us in their grooming of us all , they know that works 😢

  • @kathybriggs8902
    @kathybriggs8902 3 роки тому +3

    So.. the Narc is in a "win win"
    Situation at all times.. very interesting 🤔

  • @jdub164
    @jdub164 3 роки тому +2

    Stepping out with Ryan Gosling I wish lmao... Wouldn't that be great...

  • @vickypanagakis9430
    @vickypanagakis9430 3 роки тому

    HG thank you for all your videos, on your channels. You helped me lot over the years. Your books are eye openers too. If you ever come to Canada I’ll buy you a drink

  • @adriennegallotta2890
    @adriennegallotta2890 3 роки тому +5

    My teacher is only narcissist I will having my life long-distance as it is

  • @angelstarr3554
    @angelstarr3554 3 роки тому +6

    Don't you feel like your backstabbing your own kind? Oh I forgot narcs backstab themselves too! Hahahaha

  • @wintergoddess8210
    @wintergoddess8210 3 роки тому

    This was a Boss video thank you 😊 HG

  • @chrissiejeffreys9526
    @chrissiejeffreys9526 Рік тому

    I can understand, to a point, a direct assertion of control, depending on the mindset of the former partner, they may well have gone beyond the stage of caring and simply administer the "eye roll" with the new partner as they may be aware of the narcisstic partners behaviour. But l can't grasp how the indirect assertion of control would have an affect on anyone but the former narcissistic partner. The ex and new partner would be unaware of this so the only person to whom this would have any significance to would be the former narcissistic partner.

  • @tellnolies8530
    @tellnolies8530 3 роки тому +2

    I don’t do triangles!!

  • @girlbeautiful2727
    @girlbeautiful2727 3 роки тому

    😂🤣😂 omgggg his usage of words when u leave them

  • @latishalittle2952
    @latishalittle2952 3 роки тому +1

    Yes you do not matter 💯

  • @gellicbecca5191
    @gellicbecca5191 3 роки тому +3

    Thanks HG,