Remakes Are Awesome

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  • Опубліковано 15 вер 2024

КОМЕНТАРІ • 5 тис.

  • @TheCriticalDrinker
    @TheCriticalDrinker  4 роки тому +605

    Want to help support this channel? Consider subscribing on Patreon: www.patreon.com/TheCriticalDrinker

    • @Sandwich13455
      @Sandwich13455 4 роки тому +8

      Aah, it's refreshing to know that the Scottish stasi haven't captured you yet.

    • @miniadventureswithmark3309
      @miniadventureswithmark3309 4 роки тому +4

      I refuse to fuel your ever increasing alcohol consumption young man! Sort it out! Stop begging for money too!

    • @deathstrike
      @deathstrike 4 роки тому +5

      The critical drinker and why reboots and remakes are great. The PERFECT cure for constipation! After seeing this wonderful parody my bowels have never been cleaner! Especially after those monumental and inspirational quotes like "why work when the world should owe YOU a living? " Just beautiful!! Stay thirsty my friend!!!

    • @gart9680
      @gart9680 4 роки тому

      Nicola doesn't look like a politician? In comparison to?

    • @tywren2486
      @tywren2486 4 роки тому +1

      something's up with your mic, everything sounds tinny like i'm listening to a shit, pocket radio.

  • @sdfried4877
    @sdfried4877 5 років тому +9592

    As Batman once said: You either die the hero or live long enough to be recast as the female protagonist.

    • @TexasHollowEarth
      @TexasHollowEarth 5 років тому +385

      That was Spider-Man.... & he said recast as a gay minority..... practically a true story.

    • @vicentemorales2533
      @vicentemorales2533 5 років тому +44

      Damn 🤣🤣🤣

    • @michaelhixson6939
      @michaelhixson6939 5 років тому +16

      pfffffffffffffffff, noice!

    • @xedasxedas
      @xedasxedas 5 років тому +86

      You my friend...you just won the internet today.

    • @michaelreay2820
      @michaelreay2820 5 років тому +19

      Winning comment

  • @TheRealDasluft
    @TheRealDasluft 5 років тому +4483

    You deserve a place on the Guinness book of records for the longest unbroken stream of deeply satisfying sarcasm tirade. Wow

    • @d0gb1te
      @d0gb1te 5 років тому +68

      I could get behind this. Not sure if you're aware of what Guinness World Records has been up to lately (most spins in a motorized wheelchair!?), but your suggestion is just as deserving as anything else they've published in recent memory.

    • @HAL-dm1eh
      @HAL-dm1eh 5 років тому +75

      When God gave the Celtic people the English language, he knew what he was doing.

    • @skipintroux4444
      @skipintroux4444 5 років тому +32

      I had to watch the Linda Hamilton T2 sarcasm twice, brutal level.

    • @damienholland9244
      @damienholland9244 5 років тому +29

      He's actually going in and out of sarcasm (switching from direct criticism to sarcasm and back again).

    • @The420DeLiRiUm
      @The420DeLiRiUm 5 років тому +4

      @@d0gb1te dude... I had to unsubscribe.

  • @bitcheslovecannons5073
    @bitcheslovecannons5073 4 роки тому +4434

    The delivery of the sarcasm is so deadpan that at first I thought he was being serious. This is ART.

    • @williamerickson520
      @williamerickson520 4 роки тому +60

      That was my first impression, too.

    • @raphaelyanez4357
      @raphaelyanez4357 4 роки тому +15

      Fr tho like wtf

    • @douglasrowland3722
      @douglasrowland3722 4 роки тому +42

      THIS guy is somewhat of a genius....quite cerebral....sneaks up on you......I wonder if he drank his way to his Doctorate ?? ... If so, he must be the life of the party at the university Alumnus gatherings....(buuurpp !)

    • @chronic2001n
      @chronic2001n 4 роки тому +3

      Same

    • @douglasrowland3722
      @douglasrowland3722 4 роки тому +6

      Oh...HE'S GOOD ALRIGHT...yes...it IS Art !

  • @coalescence3835
    @coalescence3835 3 роки тому +1069

    "Twelve year old boys can be princesses as well"
    I cannot believe the state of literally everything. Makes me extra thankful for people like Drinker

    • @LeftytheGansterGremlin
      @LeftytheGansterGremlin 3 роки тому +77

      It's insane. They are all insane.

    • @lukeyznaga7627
      @lukeyznaga7627 3 роки тому +85

      its pretty ridiculous. I am afraid of sharing my opinion since I don't want to get in trouble with Google/youtube and get cancelled. So i guess I won't share that a couple of friends that I have which are gay DON'T LIKE THIS MOVIE crap either. They don't want "token" heroes representing them. they just want entertaining and good stories.

    • @LeftytheGansterGremlin
      @LeftytheGansterGremlin 3 роки тому +39

      @@lukeyznaga7627 Sounds like you have an awesome group of friends, bud!

    • @randomname9723
      @randomname9723 2 роки тому +21

      Dont know why this one is so wrong? Why not allow kids to be as masculine or feminine as they want to be without judging them? I agree that a lot of leftist stuff goes way too far but allowing people to express themselves more honestly and openly is a good thing. I also have very conservative friends who really like the She-ra remake, though I have not watched it myself.
      (I also want to make sure that everyone knows I acknowledge your opinion is valid despite being different from my own and I hope anyone who may care to reply shows me the same courtesy.)

    • @lukeyznaga7627
      @lukeyznaga7627 2 роки тому +31

      @@randomname9723 I kind of agree with you Random. I am not a conservative or liberal. both parties have good ideas, although right now, the Rethuglicans have very few good ideas. I don' T like WOKE stuff. I don't like Agenda Identity politics. BUT, I don't like taking away freedom of people to express themselves as feminine or masculine. ITS ALWAYS the Extremes that seem to rule our politics these days. Labels. Labels are inaccurate. when we categorize people into factions it goes wrong.

  • @skitzozpandaz5993
    @skitzozpandaz5993 5 років тому +1960

    On a positive note, these woke directors save me a lot of money, and a lot of time.

    • @Yesica1993
      @Yesica1993 4 роки тому +33

      That's how I look at it as well.

    • @vantastic9367
      @vantastic9367 4 роки тому +13

      Exactly

    • @mrbojangles8133
      @mrbojangles8133 4 роки тому +7

      Same gere

    • @andraslibal
      @andraslibal 4 роки тому +17

      Exactly, make them irrelevant. Just do not watch their garbage - work more, have a family, have a lot of kids and raise them with conservative values, be a dad that is present and teach them the truth. Best revenge ever.

    • @creativedoof
      @creativedoof 4 роки тому +12

      Thanks to Hollywood, my old favorite shows and movies can still be enjoyed without them going woke about anything.

  • @000xyz
    @000xyz 5 років тому +2541

    They didnt destroy your childhood....they destroyed your childrens' ability to experience theirs

  • @samking2094
    @samking2094 4 роки тому +1258

    It's sad when you feel you haven't got your money's worth after illegally downloading a movie for free!

    • @gopsdv
      @gopsdv 4 роки тому +52

      time's worth

    • @tyranid1174
      @tyranid1174 4 роки тому +18

      Big oof

    • @duzzitmatter8679
      @duzzitmatter8679 4 роки тому +18

      Great comment!

    • @xenxander
      @xenxander 4 роки тому +19

      that's what I felt about ghostbuseters 2016. torrented it and deleted it after watching.

    • @stephenrice2063
      @stephenrice2063 4 роки тому +14

      @@xenxander You have been punished for your sin. If you had paid, cognitive dissonance would've convinced you it was a masterpiece. ("I paid to watch this! It must be good!")

  • @ndinstudio543
    @ndinstudio543 2 роки тому +390

    "the fan reactions where just as enthusiastic as you'd expect"
    freaking brilliant line.

  • @archerdedi2117
    @archerdedi2117 4 роки тому +1794

    The sarcasm is heavier than his accent... Love this

    • @Lenriak
      @Lenriak 4 роки тому +45

      The Scottish accent pretty much IS distilled sarcasm. XD

    • @RedboRF
      @RedboRF 4 роки тому +1

      I wonder why he doesn't have a decent scottish accent?

    • @tomeaston483
      @tomeaston483 4 роки тому +1

      @Tom Hewitt I love having the scots North Irelandia during the 12th july and yes most of the ones I know drink enough to make George Best look teetotal 😂😂

    • @khuti007
      @khuti007 4 роки тому

      Thats Scottish ??? Thats no how ya make porridge..ua-cam.com/video/UTcA-e6bqVY/v-deo.html

    • @robirvine6970
      @robirvine6970 4 роки тому +1

      Fake accent, go watch his earlier videos.

  • @svvitchio
    @svvitchio 5 років тому +1483

    Hollywood has finally found a way to defeat the mighty Pirate Bay.
    Produce nothing worth watching, even if you can get it for free.
    That'll show'em..

    • @spaceodds1985
      @spaceodds1985 5 років тому +25

      svvitchio Maybe is it a plot to stop the spread of piracy. Make enough rubbish that people wouldn't want to see for free, thus downloading will decrease and media companies and law enforcement will say they are winning the fight against piracy whilst peddling us brand new gadgets and streaming platforms that in actuality makes pirating for free movies and tv shows easier.

    • @heretyk_1337
      @heretyk_1337 5 років тому +11

      They think, they can gaet away with this shit on the internet? I will fix them...

    • @jayg473
      @jayg473 5 років тому +1

      🤣🤣🤣🤣

    • @Gunth0r
      @Gunth0r 4 роки тому +4

      oh, come on, with all the streaming media like netflix, the battle against piracy has been won a long time ago. the piracy percentage is negligible. don't beat a dead horse, you might end up waking it.

    • @DarthVader1977
      @DarthVader1977 4 роки тому +1

      They have an .

  • @Hats502
    @Hats502 4 роки тому +2318

    The Last Jedi was great at subverting my expectations. It subverted my expectations of going to see a good Star Wars movie

    • @danielpcowen
      @danielpcowen 3 роки тому +91

      It subverted Disney's expectations of me going to see another one...

    • @johnf.kennedy5454
      @johnf.kennedy5454 3 роки тому +60

      Never saw it. The Force Awakens movie made me swear to NEVER see another Star Wars movie or show again.

    • @starcrafter13terran
      @starcrafter13terran 3 роки тому +22

      @@johnf.kennedy5454 Rogue one was okay

    • @Gamble661
      @Gamble661 3 роки тому +19

      Rogue One WAS ok, it's the only Star Wars movie I've seen since The Force Awakens and the last one I plan on seeing (the Mandalorian isn't a movie...).

    • @Shootthejester
      @Shootthejester 3 роки тому +8

      For me it was like mostly shitty moments but the scene where Luke shows up as a projection and stands against the first order to buy time for the resistance was insanely epic

  • @hansellius
    @hansellius 3 роки тому +169

    Revisiting this two years later is wonderful. Episode 9 was indeed a roaring success, the new Terminator was wonderful, and Doctor Who is going from strength to strength. Ain't life great. (/s)

  • @grumpyoldwizard
    @grumpyoldwizard 5 років тому +1513

    I think the next Dr. Who should be a Asian, female, dwarf, with a speech impediment. Maybe one lazy eye would really top it off.

    • @TomTheSaintsGuy
      @TomTheSaintsGuy 5 років тому +148

      Bigot. Why isn't she disabled and a lesbian as well?

    • @mq5731
      @mq5731 5 років тому +63

      @@TomTheSaintsGuy I know right! Definitely can't be discriminatory here.

    • @neilorourke71
      @neilorourke71 5 років тому +60

      *and has a dick

    • @katyb6979
      @katyb6979 5 років тому +65

      You forget a sexuality mental health issue, with a confused gender. And maybe have it in a wheel chair?

    • @richardhockey8442
      @richardhockey8442 5 років тому +18

      Davros with a sex change

  • @chairmanwario
    @chairmanwario 4 роки тому +1565

    “Our first minister is both a highly successful politician AND a woman. And effortlessly manages to look like neither.”

    • @Yesica1993
      @Yesica1993 4 роки тому +38

      Too funny!

    • @bobobake1232
      @bobobake1232 4 роки тому +85

      You mean Justin Trudeau right? Thnx!

    • @elperrodelautumo7511
      @elperrodelautumo7511 4 роки тому +21

      Bob Ralston lol 😆 😝 😂 I cry for Canada 🇨🇦

    • @elperrodelautumo7511
      @elperrodelautumo7511 4 роки тому +11

      Benaiah Sampson Benker Blaire White is more politician and a woman than the first minister. She should run things

    • @yonblek4542
      @yonblek4542 4 роки тому +8

      Still surprised charlies angels wasn't men. And that they didn't make charlie a woman..

  • @Instigatin
    @Instigatin 5 років тому +1809

    This may just be the longest sustained output of sarcasm recorded anywhere.
    Great video btw :)

    • @ginge641
      @ginge641 5 років тому +6

      You honestly think that this is sarcasm? Sheesh.

    • @azell2913
      @azell2913 5 років тому +6

      @@ginge641 you think this isn't sarcasm? it's pretty obvious.

    • @ginge641
      @ginge641 5 років тому +4

      @@azell2913 No, he's being very genuine and insightful. Politics > Good writing.

    • @azell2913
      @azell2913 5 років тому +17

      @@ginge641 shit iv'e been played you where being sarcastic as well, i can't tell whats real anymore.

    • @nomed361
      @nomed361 5 років тому

      This was sarcasm?

  • @BaremetalBaron
    @BaremetalBaron 5 років тому +2320

    The humor here is so dry I nearly died of dehydration.
    If only I could subscribe a second time.

    • @dracometeors3010
      @dracometeors3010 5 років тому +45

      No prob dude, i did it for you.

    • @merephet3377
      @merephet3377 5 років тому +9

      Don't forget to hydrate your self with a good bottle of warm blue milk

    • @spiderjuice9874
      @spiderjuice9874 5 років тому +7

      @@merephet3377 I would have done so, but then Shera came on - and you just can't unsee that spectacle! I used all of my blue milk rinsing my eyeballs.

    • @shirothehero0609
      @shirothehero0609 5 років тому

      Or 4th or 5th or maybe even 9th times.

    • @SogoTX
      @SogoTX 5 років тому +4

      Dryer than a JAMES BOND martini... oh, wait...

  • @stevensmith8876
    @stevensmith8876 4 роки тому +2162

    I want to see a remake of Zulu with European actors playing the parts of the African warriors.

  • @lukec2004
    @lukec2004 5 років тому +449

    There's more sarcasm in this video than quality in Hollywood

    • @lukec2004
      @lukec2004 5 років тому +26

      @@ron6181 there's less sarcasm in this video than pedophiles in Hollywood

    • @thehate2535
      @thehate2535 5 років тому +2

      @@lukec2004 ya fokin legend!

    • @JamesJones-zt2yx
      @JamesJones-zt2yx 5 років тому

      I'm sure you enjoyed this video as much as I did, but that's kind of faint praise.

    • @scottc346
      @scottc346 5 років тому +5

      There's more quality in this video than quality in Hollywood.

    • @zissler1
      @zissler1 5 років тому +1

      Not a high bar

  • @Hydrogoniise
    @Hydrogoniise 3 роки тому +223

    If we ever have to explain sarcasm to aliens, this video is going to be imperative.

    • @jorts_master69
      @jorts_master69 2 роки тому +10

      An essential course towards getting a degree in sheer sarcasm

    • @EisensteinPrime
      @EisensteinPrime 2 роки тому +3

      I understand sarcasm more than I understand humans' need to fight with each other over everything including fiction. I still have a lot to learn while I'm on your planet.

  • @yankee1376
    @yankee1376 5 років тому +315

    I just love how she hops into the Falcon's cockpit and is instantly an expert pilot, snaking through the plumbing of a crashed Star Destroyer. It's like how I changed a tire once and went on to win the Indy 500.

    • @johngalt5205
      @johngalt5205 4 роки тому +25

      She stayed at a Holiday Inn Express the night before.

    • @connorkimbral3034
      @connorkimbral3034 4 роки тому +31

      Never used a lightsaber, and automatically destroyed Kylo

    • @Kentucky_Blue
      @Kentucky_Blue 4 роки тому +4

      Yankee 137 That may be the best analogy to shove it up Hollywood's bum

    • @luk11c4
      @luk11c4 4 роки тому +2

      @@connorkimbral3034 Can you tell me what is diference between lightsaber and just normal stick that she used on her planet? I can agree that kylo should know better fighting strategies, but this two melee weapons is not so different.

    • @connorkimbral3034
      @connorkimbral3034 4 роки тому +4

      @@luk11c4 Well I mean. A lightsaber is (basically) an instant kill. Well, apparently not in the Disney world's :/. But that 1 stick has to hit the opponent multiple times to maybe break a bone. And even more blows to kill them. Lightsaber needs to also be handled differently. A stick can be held from the whole thing, while the lightsaber can only be held from the handle. A stick won't even scratch a metal wall, well, maybe a small scratch, whole the lightsaber can easily cut through there.
      There is a bit of a different but

  • @Quoteunquot3
    @Quoteunquot3 4 роки тому +3748

    Since we are gender swapping every classic character, can we get "Wonderman" and "Catman"?

    • @SCP--oz6oz
      @SCP--oz6oz 4 роки тому +410

      Pyramid no because Hollywood wants us to think the kitchen staff are strong

    • @vantastic9367
      @vantastic9367 4 роки тому +156

      We already have a Catman, his name is Ru Paul.

    • @asiberiantiger188
      @asiberiantiger188 4 роки тому +110

      Take a second to picture it.
      "Catman"
      🌈Catman🌈

    • @fumomofumosarum5893
      @fumomofumosarum5893 4 роки тому +51

      @@asiberiantiger188 there basically is a "Catman" in the show miraculous ladybug...

    • @chadm4976
      @chadm4976 4 роки тому +47

      How about 'Prince's Bride'? Oops I mean, 'The Prince's Husband'?

  • @67Spectre
    @67Spectre 4 роки тому +756

    I have a slight suspicion, now bear with me here, that there might be the slightest, teeniest, itty-bittiest hint of sarcasm in this video...maybe.

  • @dingdingdingdiiiiing
    @dingdingdingdiiiiing 2 роки тому +70

    "Huh.... well this was uncharacteristically positive, The Critical Drinker. Thank you for your kind review, it feels so good to have a solid confirmation that we are on the right path."
    Sincerely,
    Film studios

  • @neansath
    @neansath 5 років тому +664

    If sarcasm is radioactive, this guy would be a walking nuclear core.
    Subscribed!

  • @selfloathinggivesmelife7810
    @selfloathinggivesmelife7810 5 років тому +592

    It's safe to assume that at some point, everything we love will be "improved".
    I can't wait.

    • @robinthrush9672
      @robinthrush9672 5 років тому +30

      I'm looking forward to "Healthy at Any Size Albert" to be freed from the taint that is Bill Cosby.

    • @modakkagitplugga
      @modakkagitplugga 5 років тому +3

      or revised and edited to not offend modern audiences...seriously keep every initial release and old mediums, gate-keeping has yet again been corrupted from quality control to agenda.

    • @flankspeed
      @flankspeed 5 років тому +2

      Lord, preserve us from the fury of 'reform'.

    • @LinkMarioSamus
      @LinkMarioSamus 5 років тому +2

      One could easily say the '90s were a horrible time for movies, with vapid noisy blockbusters that ultimately mean very little (Independence Day, Armageddon, Twister, Volcano), adaptations that completely and utterly fail to represent the source material well (Super Mario Bros., Judge Dredd, Spawn, Godzilla), failed TV adaptations out the wazoo (Wild Wild West, The Avengers, Lost in Space, Inspector Gadget), awful sequels everywhere (Batman & Robin, Speed 2, Alien: Resurrection, City Slickers II), horrible excuses for family entertainment (Flubber, Kazaam, Jack Frost, Mr. Magoo), movies that will have you amazed they exist (Clifford, Milk Money, North, Exit to Eden), and films made by sexual predators (Pulp Fiction, The Usual Suspects, Good Will Hunting, Shakespeare in Love). Most of those kind of movies barely exist anymore.
      Things were not all sunshine and rainbows back in the day. As the Nostalgia Critic said, be f***ing grateful.

    • @LinkMarioSamus
      @LinkMarioSamus 5 років тому

      @Un-broken and victorious You've got to be kidding, even seriously this is offensive. He is KNOWN to be guilty of sex crimes! Wow.

  • @dainumo
    @dainumo 5 років тому +588

    If you could find a way to convert sarcasm into energy, you could power entire cities with just this video.

    • @ThatBillmanGuy
      @ThatBillmanGuy 5 років тому +3

      If Voyager had harnessed this video to power their warp drive, they would have easily broken the warp 10 barrier and had been home in hours.

    • @Jinkle
      @Jinkle 5 років тому

      😂

  • @thecloudtherapist
    @thecloudtherapist 3 роки тому +60

    Sheer brilliance from Hollywood. Wow, I never knew how improved and original all these reboots are.
    Thank you, Drinker, for bringing such genius writing, magical story reimaginings and sheer inclusivity agendas to our attention.
    I'm blown away! I'm enlightened!! I'm speechless!!!

  • @ThomasKrul
    @ThomasKrul 4 роки тому +522

    There's "dripping in sarcasm", there's "drenched in sarcasm", there's "in the dictionary, under the definition of 'sarcasm' is a link to this video", and then there's this video.

    • @greyclydesdale
      @greyclydesdale 3 роки тому +15

      Afloat in a sea of sarcasm.

    • @exidy-yt
      @exidy-yt 3 роки тому +25

      "Sarcasm so complete you're not sure it's even sarcasm at first".

    • @Clemppu
      @Clemppu 3 роки тому +25

      "Ah, you think sarcasm is your ally? You merely adopted the sarcasm. I was born in it, molded by it."
      -Drinker

    • @shorewall
      @shorewall 3 роки тому +9

      @@Clemppu A fish does not notice the water it lives in. This video does not notice the sarcasm it swims in. :D

    • @randymarshra
      @randymarshra 3 роки тому +3

      I mentally drowned in it right about half way through.

  • @Raptorworld22
    @Raptorworld22 4 роки тому +444

    How to fix the ghostbusters remake: Cast Amy Schumer as a fifth ghostbuster

    • @markparkinson6947
      @markparkinson6947 4 роки тому +37

      Or replace every ghostbuster with Amy Schumer.
      But yeah, that works too. XD

    • @warfightersanonymous7760
      @warfightersanonymous7760 4 роки тому +44

      She would make an excellent Slimer.

    • @theoj4356
      @theoj4356 4 роки тому +57

      She’d make a great marshmallow woman

    • @johnzoidberg1844
      @johnzoidberg1844 4 роки тому +7

      The plot will center around her haunted vagina. "Are you the keymaster?"

    • @Yo64130
      @Yo64130 4 роки тому +5

      What about a Brie Larsson cameo 😍😍😍

  • @georgesalgado8783
    @georgesalgado8783 4 роки тому +401

    1:58 she's firing a .50 cal desert eagle one-handed. They really wanted us to stretch the disbelief in that movie. 😁

    • @robertfitzgerald3118
      @robertfitzgerald3118 4 роки тому +15

      There must have been a couple of grains of
      Gunpowder in those shells huh?

    • @stephenrosenfelder4452
      @stephenrosenfelder4452 4 роки тому +50

      Fired a 44 DE one handed. That was fun. Brutal and a bit painful, but fun. And that was when I used to work out. Nah, it’ll be fine!

    • @georgesalgado8783
      @georgesalgado8783 4 роки тому +8

      @@stephenrosenfelder4452 what was the recoil like? I can only assume it kicks quite badly.

    • @warfightersanonymous7760
      @warfightersanonymous7760 4 роки тому +36

      A woman that tiny would've broken her wrist...

    • @derrickennemer5050
      @derrickennemer5050 4 роки тому +38

      No shit, my dad has one, and every time I shoot it, its like a jackhammer slamming your arm into your shoulder. Im 6'2 280 pounds, and theres no way I'd even attempt to shoot it one handed.

  • @Noone-of-your-Business
    @Noone-of-your-Business 3 роки тому +57

    6:25 - 6:50 Spot *ON!* This is _exactly_ what Disney SW teaches its viewers . I keep being apalled about how few people _notice_ this. Abrams/Johnson/Kennedy do not just piss on George Lucas' characters and lore, they also openly burn down the *moral* and *ethics* of Star Wars - the whole "be a good person" thing. THIS is what pisses me off the most - because they perverted the *_spirit_* of George Lucas' vision, not just the execution.

    • @Tallorian
      @Tallorian Рік тому +3

      I honestly think that both Lucas and his legacy got what they deserved.
      Can you imagine Tolkien himself selling all rights to the books and the universe he created to a multibillion corporation and saying "do whatevah you want pals, I don't care 'cuz I've got my big bucks"? I can't.
      So I can't be too mad at Disney and that bunch of schmucks for pissing on SW and Lucas. This sellout had it coming. Unlike Tolkien with ROP.

    • @YS420X
      @YS420X Рік тому

      The spirit of any Disney movie is destroyed and burned when their overpaid liberal writers sit down and self insert themselves into iconic storylines. It's all they know how to do anymore

  • @mistreme8341
    @mistreme8341 5 років тому +349

    The sarcasm here is a rare vintage with a complex body and a transformative bouquet.

    • @jonathanbrooks4969
      @jonathanbrooks4969 5 років тому +1

      With such a fine sarcasm woody aftertaste.

    • @mistreme8341
      @mistreme8341 5 років тому +4

      The venom in it does give it a rich oaky quality.

    • @jimruby9657
      @jimruby9657 5 років тому +2

      Now I'm not sure if I should listen to it, drink it, or eat it!

    • @ShutoStriker
      @ShutoStriker 5 років тому

      lmao it took me a minute to realize this was sarcasm. Transformative indeed.

  • @WildZephyr
    @WildZephyr 5 років тому +237

    Terminator should have stopped with the second movie. It was literally the perfect point to end things. So of course they couldn't let it go.

    • @stephenrosenfelder4452
      @stephenrosenfelder4452 4 роки тому +3

      $$$$$$$$$$$$$$$$$$$$$$$$

    • @jeffbovee6510
      @jeffbovee6510 4 роки тому +1

      I stopped after watching #2. I felt that there was no reason for anything else so stopped.

    • @Vovan07
      @Vovan07 4 роки тому +2

      I feel like salvation was a good Terminator 3 to conclude the franchise. I kind of always wanted to see them duke it out in the post-apocalypse and that movie did it for me.

    • @xxxhazz4196
      @xxxhazz4196 4 роки тому

      I loved t2 i thought it was way better than the first one

    • @ThorneyedWT
      @ThorneyedWT 4 роки тому +3

      T1 and T2 are timeless classic, but 3 and 4 were ok movies worth watching - with some flaws, but also with some original ideas and twists. Oh and chase scene in T3 was awesome. Franchise could live happily with spin-offs and focusing on expanded lore with some new characters leaving old ones alone (maybe with ocassional cameos). But some idiot decided to make T5 "soft reboot" and behold - they processed everything good from old movies into steaming pile of shit. In Dark Fart they did even worse, trying to reboot at expense of old beloved characters, blatantly killing them or turning into idiots or jerks.
      For fucks sake, I'm not biggest fan of MCU past phase 2, but at least those guys managed to kill or phase out characters with respect. Tony, Cap, Nat and more - went away with bittersweet feeling and were true to themselves until the end. And now we look at Sore Connor or Jake Skywalker...

  • @gunzillagunzilla7975
    @gunzillagunzilla7975 3 роки тому +294

    Once Kathleen Kennedy is gone, I would very much like to watch a very honest and very heartfelt talk with Mark Hamill on how he felt about the role, the movies and where it was going.

    • @toddnolastname4485
      @toddnolastname4485 2 роки тому +16

      Nine months later and we're still waiting.

    • @asmosisyup2557
      @asmosisyup2557 2 роки тому +26

      Hope he lives long enough, she's holding onto that position for dear life.

    • @DivineDawn
      @DivineDawn 2 роки тому +8

      Well good news rumor is she’s been canned and all her shows are on hold or have been outright cancelled. This is a rumor but doomcock the UA-camd has a very good track run so hopefully there’s a good chance KK will be shit canned with extreme prejudice

    • @Tallorian
      @Tallorian Рік тому +3

      @@DivineDawn Doesn't seem so, but there are rumors of a new jar-jar abrams-style sequel to the amazing, glorious and empowering sequels. Yup. She won't be gone until the mob with pitchforks and torches takes her down.

    • @Dowlphin
      @Dowlphin Рік тому

      Hamill doesn't seem to have a problem with cheesy-cringy story writing, though, when it comes directly from the US government (including corporate press) instead of filtered through Hollywood.

  • @simonhadley8829
    @simonhadley8829 2 роки тому +19

    Given the state of movies now I'm genuinely glad to be living in a very rural town with no access to a movie theater. This from someone who obsessively watched theatrical releases through the 80's and 90's.

  • @DavidDiaz-nh3vh
    @DavidDiaz-nh3vh 4 роки тому +1159

    We need actual strong female leads like Ripley and fit Sarah Conners

    • @weswolever7477
      @weswolever7477 3 роки тому +18

      Mrs Emma Peel anyone?

    • @ryanw2032
      @ryanw2032 3 роки тому +12

      The best strong female lead was Kathy Bates in Dolores Claiborne

    • @michaeljenner2325
      @michaeljenner2325 3 роки тому +19

      Or most of the pre discovery Star Trek female characters.

    • @julianmarsh1378
      @julianmarsh1378 3 роки тому +22

      Nawww....who can relate to those two? How many women do you know who are that determined, capable, etc? They might intimidate your average female. Give us people who look like they were plucked from the street....when heroines (I refuse to call them heroes) who look like anybody, means they are nobody.

    • @TheFourthWinchester
      @TheFourthWinchester 3 роки тому +33

      Even the female characters in the Harry Potter movies are amazing. Strong females doesn't just mean ripped females.

  • @westpoll1
    @westpoll1 3 роки тому +74

    “Irony is wasted on the stupid”― Oscar Wilde

  • @danielmuliira5363
    @danielmuliira5363 4 роки тому +615

    The milk scene in last jedi is revolting every time it comes on

    • @abnryacehilm6423
      @abnryacehilm6423 4 роки тому +5

      Yeah, it's pretty relatable.

    • @All2Meme
      @All2Meme 4 роки тому +24

      It's nasty looking, but I'm pretty sure they could have made it worse-looking if they tried.

    • @gm2407
      @gm2407 4 роки тому +23

      It's the only funny and good scene in the film. Luke is just milking his cattle, like Disney is milking Star Wars. The rest of the film has a lot wrong with it though.

    • @juicebox7372
      @juicebox7372 4 роки тому +13

      @@gm2407 You do know it was confirmed that he was 'milking' a male

    • @jaredt5127
      @jaredt5127 4 роки тому +1

      That was the point

  • @1whowasNEVERhere
    @1whowasNEVERhere 4 роки тому +586

    I literally spit out my drink laughing with the line about the Scottish First Minister effortlessly looks like neither a politician or a woman🤣

  • @holymasterchief
    @holymasterchief 3 роки тому +307

    I remember when remakes were actually good. The Thing, The Fly, The Blob... three 80s movies that were remakes of 50s movies that were based on short stories and radio dramas. I know the video was sarcasm incarnate but I have to ask, why are remakes nowadays so shitty and these three are among my favorite horror/monster movies?
    I can't think of a single remake from the last two decades that I would call better than the original. I did like the 2013 Evil Dead movie but it just can't compare to the campy Bruce Campbell gorefest.
    It's this generation of boohooers who were taught they always deserve respect, yet were never taught how to earn it. I don't hear a single physically disabled person crying out against society and media for not portraying their plight, which their plight would actually make for good inspiring stories of being dealt crummy hands by life and striving to be something that while not conventional is still worthy of praise and acceptance.
    Instead we have these people who claim to be oppressed as they live in comfy homes and have easy access to food, water, and basic necessities like designer clothes and the latest social media apps. They literally want to remake the world in their image because they feel so insecure that everything that isn't like them is a threat, even when it actually isn't.
    There is a proverb that I'm about to misquote but I think I have the essence of it: "Never take for malice what can easily be attributed for stupidity."
    I don't think these people are evil, just severely misguided and with giant egos and fragile self-esteems. Their hubris will be their downfall when no one buys their shit and all they can do is feed their own self-loathing, never accepting that they were in the wrong and need to change. Because who needs to change nowadays when you can blame everyone else?
    Apologies for the rant, I've been watching a lot of The Drinker's videos and it finally came to a head.

    • @imtoddhowardandimadeskyrim6553
      @imtoddhowardandimadeskyrim6553 3 роки тому +11

      I mean compared to to the original, the thing 2011 is a downgrade. It's a pretty good movie but the original in my eyes is just so much better

    • @brucetucker4847
      @brucetucker4847 3 роки тому +25

      @@imtoddhowardandimadeskyrim6553 He meant the 1980s Thing, which was a remake of a 1950s movie. The 2011 one is a prequel.

    • @imtoddhowardandimadeskyrim6553
      @imtoddhowardandimadeskyrim6553 3 роки тому +6

      @@brucetucker4847 aaaaah

    • @Anthrolithos
      @Anthrolithos 3 роки тому +12

      Yes but Terry Hatcher would quote from his Discworld series and say, "Any sufficiently advanced stupidity is indistinguishable from malice".

    • @Ironcabbit
      @Ironcabbit 3 роки тому +12

      Terry Pratchet, you mean. Teri Hatcher was a 90s daytime TV star.

  • @arkajyotijha906
    @arkajyotijha906 5 років тому +91

    I haven't heard such sarcasm since my last date when said she enjoyed my company

  • @dr.j.h.1070
    @dr.j.h.1070 5 років тому +361

    I want to thank the woke Hollywood executive for helping me save a lot of movie in movie tickets. Thank you SJW'S!

    • @thunderbird1921
      @thunderbird1921 5 років тому +10

      Toy Story 4 was pretty terrible too. Thankfully the specials and the original trilogy are unscathed. Hollywood is literally setting America's pop culture on fire. Unreal.

    • @martialme84
      @martialme84 5 років тому +2

      *SJWs
      You don´t use the ´ to make a plural. You just add the s.
      Yeah, i saved so much money too, i´m thinking about developing a drinking habit with the extra cash i got now...

    • @martialme84
      @martialme84 5 років тому +1

      @Dauda András Huh?
      Which of my statements is unclear to you?

    • @danstvguy
      @danstvguy 5 років тому

      @@thunderbird1921 Toy Story 4 was quite good. Most everything else is formula.

    • @damienholland9244
      @damienholland9244 5 років тому

      SJWs gave you many of the rights you enjoy today. I know the term is more about modern people trying to impose their will on you for your not speaking in PC fashion but social justice actually has an extremely important basis regarding quality of life not just here but in every society.

  • @tackytrooper
    @tackytrooper 5 років тому +70

    I love how he uses the clip of Luke drinking the alien milk in literally EVERY video about star wars. It's an utterly iconic scene now.
    Iconic of the dying light of our childhoods.

    • @Yesica1993
      @Yesica1993 4 роки тому

      I think my brain had erased it! Honestly, that horrible moment in TFA stopped my brain. I don't remember anything else about that movie. TLJ looked good in comparison. But I don't remember much about it. I was still in shock over what they did in TFA!

    • @bobobake1232
      @bobobake1232 4 роки тому

      Fuck that shit! They can fix all that Disney garbage in 1 half decent fan film... it's just a bad dream... almost over is my guess...

  • @vavrikmartin
    @vavrikmartin 3 роки тому +9

    One thousand dislikes? What is wrong with people? The best piece of irony for a long time I have seen.

  • @aeroprime3322
    @aeroprime3322 5 років тому +300

    I'm seriously wondering how this video didn't collapse into a sarcasm singularity. Probably the alcohol. I know *I* couldn't say any of this with a straight face without sufficient liquid lubrication.

    • @GMak81
      @GMak81 5 років тому +9

      Sarcasm singularity, I like that.

  • @realamztvs
    @realamztvs 5 років тому +312

    The milk scene from the Last Jedi could pretty much sum up the whole movie

    • @completelyroundoak
      @completelyroundoak 4 роки тому +9

      *franchise

    • @CoffeeLover42045
      @CoffeeLover42045 4 роки тому +10

      @@completelyroundoak Not the franchise, everything after the force awakens sucked

    • @earthexplorer1
      @earthexplorer1 4 роки тому +3

      That scene for me was a turning point. At that momonet, I knew the movie was going to go down hill from there.

    • @ludwinc4951
      @ludwinc4951 3 роки тому

      'It sucks, but fuck it i'll get it down me'

  • @Daemonik
    @Daemonik 5 років тому +446

    "now 12 year old boys can be princesses of power..."
    Cue snorting Monster out of my nose.

    • @abrahambobst4602
      @abrahambobst4602 5 років тому +3

      Exactly, haven't you seen the new She-Ra? lol

    • @Jay_Sullivan
      @Jay_Sullivan 5 років тому +4

      Abraham Bobst , is it a tranny?

    • @alvarodiaz2221
      @alvarodiaz2221 5 років тому +11

      Are you telling me your nose is a renewable source of energy drinks? Man, you truly are a blessed being.

    • @Daemonik
      @Daemonik 5 років тому

      @@alvarodiaz2221 Just trying to think of a name to market it now!

    • @mirrorzone5224
      @mirrorzone5224 5 років тому +1

      She isn't a boy.

  • @jensdeblock5877
    @jensdeblock5877 3 роки тому +12

    The sheer sarcasm in this video is so hilariously well-done.

  • @ThinkscapeVideo
    @ThinkscapeVideo 5 років тому +344

    PLEASE stop with the Luke milking clip (in a loop) already. We don't deserve the ongoing torture... Already scarred after the movie itself 🤦‍♂️

    • @LunaWolf217
      @LunaWolf217 5 років тому +28

      ThinkscapeVideo I think you'll find he's MILKING that footage for all it's worth :P

    • @cwdrock
      @cwdrock 5 років тому +7

      That which is ignored cannot hurt you. I saw the warning signs and didn't bother to watch it in any form. Best decision ever.

    • @cuntpuncherino
      @cuntpuncherino 5 років тому

      It's only unwatchable if you're already on the brink of puking

    • @GalacticChimp
      @GalacticChimp 5 років тому +7

      When I saw TLJ in theatres, there was music playing in the projection booth and I had to step outside to let someone know. At exactly that time, divine intervention spared me from seeing the milking scene. #eternallyGrateful

    • @mrknarf4438
      @mrknarf4438 5 років тому +4

      Yeah, show us something else! Like when Luke gets beaten by Rey! Or when Leia flies into space! Or when ghost Yoda shits on everything he's ever believed! So many iconic scenes! :p

  • @anulfadventures
    @anulfadventures 5 років тому +231

    All the writers in Hollywood couldn't match the talent in The Critical Drinker's little finger.

  • @SomethinSik
    @SomethinSik 5 років тому +359

    This video was so stunning, brave, powerful, inclusive and diverse.
    #FreeBleed

  • @BlackMagic58000
    @BlackMagic58000 3 роки тому +68

    Not gonna lie, I laughed. I cried, I even got annoyed and mad. I kinda shocked myself at the full emotional range this review brought me. Lol

  • @BessieRiggs
    @BessieRiggs 5 років тому +157

    “Nah, it’ll be fine” deserves a t-shirt

    • @lunabe11e
      @lunabe11e 4 роки тому

      BessieRiggs yup! I want one too and a bumper sticker.

    • @Scarplague
      @Scarplague 4 роки тому +2

      I'd buy one.

    • @Sandalphonn
      @Sandalphonn 4 роки тому

      I would love a "don't know, don't care" shirt

    • @bluerobin2982
      @bluerobin2982 4 роки тому

      @@Sandalphonn go away now

  • @jasonbaird1645
    @jasonbaird1645 5 років тому +202

    If the plan was to cure rational people of their TV and movie addictions, it's working perfectly.

    • @Recken1
      @Recken1 4 роки тому +11

      I find myself unable to watch anything anymore.

    • @chaoscast
      @chaoscast 4 роки тому

      true. I read more books now.

  • @johnappleseed8839
    @johnappleseed8839 5 років тому +164

    Now this is how you evade censorship. You're a pioneer, sir!

    • @Erakius323
      @Erakius323 5 років тому +28

      John Appleseed I remember the story of a monk, who wished to criticise the Catholic Church, in the medieval ages. A, unwise decision, unless you like being used as a fire starter for a bonfire. So, he wrote a book, in which he claimed to support the catholic church, and listed all his actual arguments against its corruptions and weaknesses, and then proceeded to attack and destroy his own arguments with the church’s logic. This showing how he is on the church’s side. While also spreading his own actual opinions to a wide audience. All under the inquisitions watchful gaze. This video reminded me of that book.

    • @resemblelife
      @resemblelife 5 років тому

      Master Erakius Martin Luther?

    • @davidharrison7014
      @davidharrison7014 4 роки тому

      Actually, Shakespeare pioneered this in "Julius Caesar": "........He was an honourable man".

  • @zappzack
    @zappzack 3 роки тому +5

    Such an exciting time to be a movie reviewer and critic as the sheer volume of quality on the silver screen is unparalleled compared to any other time. Great work @criticaldrnker. The gallery salutes you.

  • @JamesMcCormickIV
    @JamesMcCormickIV 5 років тому +126

    Jesus! The sarcasm was so strong in this that it rang my doorbell, punched me in the eye knocking me out, walked over my fallen body to my fridge, and stole a 6 pack of Natie Light.
    Love the vids! But you owe me a 6-pack, man. Not cool.

    • @brycesolomon9933
      @brycesolomon9933 5 років тому +4

      James McCormick if the sarcasm stole Natti Lite you better punch the clerk for telling you it was premo beer lol.

    • @robertfink4768
      @robertfink4768 5 років тому +1

      The fact that you have nattie light means you deserve to get punched in the face

  • @RobertoTheOriginalManFromTheA
    @RobertoTheOriginalManFromTheA 5 років тому +124

    Thanks for reminding me why I love 80s and 90s entertainment..

  • @gimmeboobes
    @gimmeboobes 5 років тому +139

    Brilliant. We get to roast our weenies over the burning embers of franchises we grew up wirh. We are blessed.

    • @jcb3393
      @jcb3393 5 років тому +3

      That is the goal, right? Our weenies must be burned away, so as to prevent any more toxicity and patriarchy, right?

    • @lakshaykochhar9802
      @lakshaykochhar9802 5 років тому +3

      It's so good it's makes me want to cry.

    • @belliott538
      @belliott538 5 років тому +2

      Hah! Don't forget yer Chestnuts, we'll be Roasting them right along side our Wieners... Happy Daze!

  • @avalle4493
    @avalle4493 3 роки тому +147

    Cobra Kai is literally the only reboot that is really good.

    • @jaxongilliam5742
      @jaxongilliam5742 3 роки тому +5

      I know I love it

    • @davidhughmiller
      @davidhughmiller 3 роки тому +21

      But it’s not really a reboot but a sequel!

    • @tanmaydeshpande
      @tanmaydeshpande 3 роки тому +13

      @@davidhughmiller a good sequel at that.

    • @dawsynasay4841
      @dawsynasay4841 3 роки тому +1

      @Jack Potfees Or you just lack good taste

    • @ernestomiloli8414
      @ernestomiloli8414 3 роки тому +6

      I feel like I'm the only person on the planet that doesn't like it

  • @WarlockX4
    @WarlockX4 5 років тому +351

    Your videos are gold man. I hope you never stop making them!

    • @MsSharondenadel
      @MsSharondenadel 5 років тому +6

      Hope alcohol don't finish him before 😉

    • @defshepard
      @defshepard 5 років тому +3

      Same here. Love his take on modern day movies and entertainment.

    • @alexandert696
      @alexandert696 5 років тому +2

      Wait, are you being sarcastic here?

  • @Amaroq64
    @Amaroq64 4 роки тому +58

    "Your elders possess no wisdom or insights worth listening to.
    Their decades of life experience are less important than your opinions.
    Everyone that matters will automatically like, respect, and trust you.
    You don't need to work or struggle for anything. You're already good enough to succeed.
    Failure isn't an option, because it's impossible to fail at anything anyway.
    Learning new skills is easy, it just kinda happens.
    Everyone else in the world is less intelligent and determined than you."
    You just described the left-wing side of the culture war in sixty seconds.

    • @_GR1T_
      @_GR1T_ 2 роки тому

      7 great t-shirts right there. I should print these out and hang them on my teenager's wall.

  • @MrShellbuster
    @MrShellbuster 4 роки тому +144

    That was the most depressing 'go away now' I have ever heard

  • @CurriedBat
    @CurriedBat 2 роки тому +9

    The best unbiased review of these great movies. You sir, are the actor we've been looking for. The greatest actor in the world, Gary.

  • @omali1105
    @omali1105 4 роки тому +143

    *The sarcasm is strong with this one*

    • @reek4062
      @reek4062 4 роки тому +5

      let the sarcasm flow through you

    • @vvcreative2628
      @vvcreative2628 3 роки тому +4

      Only if you knew the power of the SJW's!

    • @deathstrike
      @deathstrike 3 роки тому

      The liquor store closed early when The Drinker mentioned he was making this video. (salutes your liver for its sacrifice for the making of this).

  • @visualwarp9707
    @visualwarp9707 5 років тому +23

    You’re right about how people will look back on these times years from now. I was just thinking about this myself. Like so many great fads in human history, the great social justice wars will be remembered for generations. Accomplishing so much good casting in the film world and righting so many lefts. Kids these days don’t know how good they have it. When I was younger all we had was writing, actors performances, and editing. And maybe an orchestral film score. How can you make truly good art like that? It was like they knew nothing about politics and quotas and marketing. We were so ignorant then. Oh and what about these computer generated images. I can’t get enough of it. It makes me feel like maybe I’m playing a video game when I’m actually just sitting there staring at a screen full of rapidly moving shapes and colors - all while completely unengaged, placid and docile, almost in a trance. Try capturing that feeling with just a camera and a human subject. Can’t be done.

  • @LordSkullkid
    @LordSkullkid 4 роки тому +451

    "I paused to congratulate myself"
    Pretty much every SJW and WOKE activist

    • @climatedeniersbelonginasyl4191
      @climatedeniersbelonginasyl4191 3 роки тому +3

      Yes, but don't you think the future, due to climate change, is going to be so bright that we are all going to need sunglasses?

    • @ZoolGatekeeper
      @ZoolGatekeeper 3 роки тому +6

      If Ghostbusters 2016 part 2 is a thing, I'm visiting Scotland with a bottle of Loch Lomond and getting drowned in Loch Ness.

    • @arbiterskiss6692
      @arbiterskiss6692 3 роки тому +9

      They break their own arms patting themselves on the back.

    • @pokeface119
      @pokeface119 3 роки тому

      what UA-cam today be like

    • @TheBlackHelicopterRevue
      @TheBlackHelicopterRevue 3 роки тому

      😆

  • @ernestomiloli8414
    @ernestomiloli8414 3 роки тому +12

    Dis guy is a literary genius and I'm obsessed wit his channel! I love it

  • @zacksari
    @zacksari 5 років тому +77

    I had actually managed to wipe that Ghostbusters reboot from my memory thanks for bringing it back as it is ofcourse miles better than the originals

    • @ard1805
      @ard1805 5 років тому +2

      Remember when that lady did that thing, and that other stuff happened?
      Incredible.

  • @iggytheincubus
    @iggytheincubus 5 років тому +414

    Remember Jenny? The Doctor's daughter? If they wanted a strong character that was a woman, they could have made an entirely new series based on her and her adventures.
    But whatever. Creativity is overrated

    • @paulware4701
      @paulware4701 4 роки тому +48

      Yeah, and obviously the Sarah Jane Adventures never actually happened, we just dreamed it while we were in the shower.

    • @JamesMC04
      @JamesMC04 4 роки тому +37

      That would not have wrecked the Doctor himself, which is what all this is about. Spiting the patriarchy is more important than having strong female characters. Feminists are worse than Davros & the Master Combined.

    • @mojkanal9519
      @mojkanal9519 4 роки тому +3

      Why to put stupid "strong woman" charachter at all?

    • @commandercat10
      @commandercat10 4 роки тому +4

      Yeah when I first saw the new doctor I thought it was the doctors daughter but I was wrong

    • @SideshowBob44
      @SideshowBob44 4 роки тому +10

      The actress who played Jenny is married to David Tennant lol

  • @480JD
    @480JD 5 років тому +276

    Didn't know about She Ra reboot until now, thanks Hollywood for treating yet another loved childhood franchise like an unescorted and uncovered western woman walking through the islamic no-go zone of her city late at night.

    • @Raycheetah
      @Raycheetah 5 років тому +22

      The creators of the She-Ra reboot are on record stating that the new show is basically their own, personal fan-fic. Then understand that they are also lesbians, and you'll see how "Boy-Girl, PrinXXXX (dun wanna be too gender specific) of Power" is being developed. =9[.]9=

    • @TyrDrum
      @TyrDrum 5 років тому +35

      Makes you really appreciate the little things, like when everything was normal.

    • @2Wolves1Core
      @2Wolves1Core 5 років тому +2

      It’s actually good . We will have to wait and see if season 2 sucks or not

    • @2Wolves1Core
      @2Wolves1Core 5 років тому +2

      Also no boys are priencess of power.... so I don’t understand what you are talking about

    • @james501001
      @james501001 5 років тому +2

      +480JD
      You are idiotically exagerating.

  • @Devil-Made
    @Devil-Made 2 роки тому +5

    My god you are my hero. Honestly though, I thought something was wrong with me. Seeing this social “justice” everywhere, being told or at least implied that I should feel ashamed to be a man, while simultaneously watching third wave feminists take control of the media and tell people to be more inclusive. I’ve always thought of myself as an opened minded, accepting, kind-hearted individual. I’ve never hit a woman, never gaslighted anyone, never manipulated anyone, never abused power for personal gain. But clearly I’m what’s wrong with society - not because of any overt choices or decisions I’ve made in life, but simply because it’s the way I was born.
    Thanks for being a voice to people like me. People who silently listen to the world telling us we’re toxic in every ad, every podcast (I’m talking about you Chuck! #SYSK), every movie, book, or song. People who don’t rage out and get angry at this, but quietly accept it for the injustice it is, as just another hurdle, another challenge, another ring on the ladder of life that we must learn to live with, all the while knowing that it’s not what others think of you that matters, but how you act, and ultimately how you treat others, that truly defines one’s character.
    Maybe I’m being pretentious, maybe ignorant, maybe too damn sappy and serious, idk. All I know is I’ve seen this trend unfold before my eyes over the years and felt the quiet anger grow. Anger not at being blamed for the world’s ills, but anger at myself for being angry at all. Because that’s toxic. And I should be ashamed. And so I was.
    It’s just nice to know I’m not alone in recognizing this.

    • @GalaxyDogenut
      @GalaxyDogenut 2 роки тому +1

      Nah, you’re pretty fine. This blaming men thing is ridiculous.

  • @Seomus
    @Seomus 5 років тому +128

    I don't know how I was so wrong. Thanks for showing me the errors of my White male, straight ways.

    • @jcb3393
      @jcb3393 5 років тому +10

      correct - you must embrace the rainbow flag (ignoring that each line of color is, in fact, straight).

  • @CataclysmDM
    @CataclysmDM 5 років тому +91

    There's something so soothing about your voice. Your cockney accent dripping with sarcasm and barely suppressed rage. And hard alcohol. Simply excellent.

    • @TumchieTheScot
      @TumchieTheScot 5 років тому +34

      "Cockney" You fucking what? Dat there is a proud Scotsman, you can tell by the way he slurs his words after the brain and liver damage.

    • @KK-zb3xc
      @KK-zb3xc 5 років тому +3

      Cockney ????? I would say scouser .

    • @michaelatanasio223
      @michaelatanasio223 5 років тому

      Looooots of alcohol...

    • @MrDucktastic
      @MrDucktastic 5 років тому

      Obviously a Geordie!

    • @codyw1
      @codyw1 5 років тому +1

      I'm an Englishman with a Yorkshire accent in Aussieland. The locals think I'M Scottish lols

  • @ironvlogger9712
    @ironvlogger9712 4 роки тому +259

    The 13th Doctor cured me of my Doctor Who obsession 😩

    • @evanharrison4054
      @evanharrison4054 3 роки тому +11

      I'd rather say that the 13th Doctor cured the Doctor Who of its fandom.
      I've yet to run into a Doctor Who fan(whovite? whovian?) who didn't feel the need to immediately clarify that they stopped watching after either Smith or Capaldi.
      Don't get me wrong, I always liked Doctor Who, but I was always more of a "tangential fan" as in "watches the episodes, enjoys them and then expects no logical consistency or story continuation whatsoever" but it is freaky how even the most diehard, least intelligent fans of "da' Who", are now completely disconnected from the entire thing.
      Talk about a nosedive.
      Every long running tv show has bad episodes and usually even a "worst season" so bad you'd rather just skip most of it, but Doctor Who seems utterly committed to being the worst it's ever been since its conception.
      It somehow makes me think of an emotionally stunted 70 year old who just started having his "rebellious teenage years" where suddenly, he sheds all the things that previously defined him.
      A weird mix of the "terrible twos" and "midlife crisis", decades after either of those would've been relevant or even age appropriate.

    • @ratedr8490
      @ratedr8490 3 роки тому +1

      Capaldi put dr who in the coffin, Jodi put the nails in it. Go woke get broke.

    • @Dat_Jonx
      @Dat_Jonx 3 роки тому

      @@ratedr8490 Not like it was Capaldi fault, rather than BBC decision.

    • @ratedr8490
      @ratedr8490 3 роки тому

      @@Dat_Jonx the more I learn about this industry the more I know that actors get a say in things. If they are convincing or brave enough to force their opinion.
      Capaldi is a weak actor, and a shill for the liberal agenda.

    • @drinkingwolf4208
      @drinkingwolf4208 3 роки тому

      For real

  • @OmarAlikaj
    @OmarAlikaj 3 роки тому +8

    This is a fabulous sarcasm galore, you can cut the atmosphere with a knife.

  • @quis9726
    @quis9726 4 роки тому +409

    Can’t wait for the all black Mulan reboot to come out! 🙃

    • @Linkario86
      @Linkario86 3 роки тому +7

      UA-cam commentary Police Algo deleting my shit again for making a good movie proposal

    • @woodrunner51
      @woodrunner51 3 роки тому +31

      yo, diversity, mulan should be a man xD

    • @neilmelendez2101
      @neilmelendez2101 3 роки тому +22

      @@woodrunner51 and a proud part of the LGBTQ+ community

    • @Valandor_Celestial_Warlock
      @Valandor_Celestial_Warlock 3 роки тому +7

      @@neilmelendez2101 and male-ish.

    • @justinheiland8264
      @justinheiland8264 3 роки тому +5

      I can’t wait to bring my daughter to see the all new and improved black Ariel. Or the new Snow White that will soon come out. In reality she’s not seeing either because there is sure to be the most woke and gay shot possible in both movies just like every other one today

  • @TheKielbasaKid
    @TheKielbasaKid 5 років тому +127

    "The sarcasm is strong in this one ." - Obi Wan Kenobi ( paraphrased )

  • @nottheone1357
    @nottheone1357 5 років тому +80

    The level of sarcasm had me confused at times, I think it's due to the amount of political correctness I have been subjected to.

    • @jasonbaird1645
      @jasonbaird1645 5 років тому +4

      SJWs are hilarious. They're hilarious because they don't know they're hilarious.

    • @completelyroundoak
      @completelyroundoak 4 роки тому +5

      @@jasonbaird1645 They're hilarious until you realize that they can summon a twitter mob and bully your employer into firing you and making sure you never get another job again

    • @andrewmiller1813
      @andrewmiller1813 4 роки тому +3

      @@completelyroundoakyou and Jason are both correct, they are hilarious and dangerous at the same time, it is funny as hell to listen to them and watch them carry on but it is also scary to watch people allow themselves to be so easily shepherded into The lunatic Fringe.

  • @colinmackenzie6277
    @colinmackenzie6277 3 роки тому +42

    We need original movies, like Planet of the SJWs, or Queen Kong. I'm sure the Critical Drinker could whip up the screenplays in a jiffy! 👍🤣😅😆

    • @FuckinZ3braS0n
      @FuckinZ3braS0n 2 роки тому +5

      Planet of the SJWs 🤣🤣🤣🤣 that's fuckin genius let's start a GoFundMe immediately

  • @FJB_FNFA
    @FJB_FNFA 3 роки тому +153

    This, my friend, is your goddamned masterpiece.

  • @scottharris9506
    @scottharris9506 5 років тому +67

    Damn that was great to watch. You subverted every one of my expectations.

  • @Alondro77
    @Alondro77 4 роки тому +206

    SJW watches this back in April, "I totally agree with all these points!"
    Right about now, the same SJW, "Wait, was he being sarcastic? REEEEEEEEEEEE!!!"

  • @maverickrhodes9892
    @maverickrhodes9892 2 роки тому +16

    "its both empowering AND inspiring to know that 12 year old boys can now be Princess of Power as well" what a line 😂😂🤣🤣

  • @Riv3rJordan333
    @Riv3rJordan333 4 роки тому +85

    The sarcasm in this video is top tier

  • @davidwalkerx1
    @davidwalkerx1 5 років тому +20

    It's funny how the art of late Rome was on a decline at the end of the Western Empire, history doesn't repeat it self but it often rhymes.

  • @eugeneforge
    @eugeneforge 4 роки тому +32

    I can't believe I missed this one from a year ago. The sarcasm was so thick and on point I almost wanted to believe everything you said, but it's amazing how worn out your voice sounds over this. I can feel the overwhelming sadness as the entertainment industry continues to destroy the simple joys we had from these properties in the past to show how woke they are to all the SJWs.

  • @albogypsy2842
    @albogypsy2842 3 роки тому +1

    You proved you can make a video like the best of mainstream reviews! Nothing but true and objective journalism! UA-cam needs more videos like this one!

  • @MiniMagoo132
    @MiniMagoo132 5 років тому +47

    Watching this video makes me glad lord of the rings was made when it was and not today

    • @My_leg1
      @My_leg1 4 роки тому +16

      Lotr was made at the perfect time when cgi wasnt awful and before all the social justice bushit.

    • @StephenJG22
      @StephenJG22 4 роки тому +5

      I agree but don't fecking jinx it. You underestimate their power.

    • @Sorakeyblademaster37
      @Sorakeyblademaster37 4 роки тому +2

      The Dark Lords in the land of Hollywood bide their time for the last of the Wise, Christopher Tolkien, to pass from this world to the halls of Eru Illuvatar.

    • @Scarplague
      @Scarplague 4 роки тому +1

      Let's hope Amazon doesn't fuck it up.

    • @MrGeek2112
      @MrGeek2112 4 роки тому +2

      That's okay, Elrond returned in Star Trek: Picard.

  • @mattpeacock5208
    @mattpeacock5208 3 роки тому +22

    This level of sarcasm is actually dangerous, it displaces oxygen, and I might die.

  • @astropictures4396
    @astropictures4396 4 роки тому +150

    I feel sorry for the people who think this is serious

    • @saurabh7509
      @saurabh7509 2 роки тому +13

      as drinker once said, they are the target demographic for these movies lmao

    • @NathanCassidy721
      @NathanCassidy721 2 роки тому +3

      I’m not.
      Consider they are the reason entertainment is in the state it’s in right now.

  • @interhistoria5632
    @interhistoria5632 3 роки тому +3

    And the joy knowing we'll probably keep getting more films just like these to talk about in the future.

  • @logicplague
    @logicplague 5 років тому +36

    You forgot Star Trek Discovery! It was about time that old space western was brought into the 21st century with a strong female character like Mikey Spock. Not only does she bring some long overdue diversity to the Star Trek cast, she's just the bestest evar!

    • @shirothehero0609
      @shirothehero0609 5 років тому

      Discovery proved that even women can have (shockingly) generic male names proving that in the future, gender truly doesn't matter when you're naming your kid a generic name.

  • @jaroslavb.korinek7285
    @jaroslavb.korinek7285 5 років тому +36

    The 13th Doctor was so awesome in healing I'm finally free from this curse that lasted for 50 years.
    F*ck!

  • @alruiz512
    @alruiz512 4 роки тому +60

    Jesus the sarcasm dripping off every single description is amazing!

  • @robertmoats1890
    @robertmoats1890 8 місяців тому

    See, this is why you rock. No one in their right mind would make a video like this without throwing a very obvious "aha!" somewhere in there, so that the really dense people won't take it the wrong way. But you just left them standing out in the cold. It's brilliant.

  • @PopoXReturnz
    @PopoXReturnz 5 років тому +27

    2:09
    The way she handles a full size combat shotgun's recoil is enviable.

    • @Whispangle
      @Whispangle 5 років тому +1

      My 16 year old, super buff, friend used a shotgun and still had some actual recoil

    • @PopoXReturnz
      @PopoXReturnz 5 років тому

      Crunch Bandicoot Just goes to show how much more buff this chick is.

  • @jonathanbrooks4969
    @jonathanbrooks4969 5 років тому +31

    Your "Salt" is finer than any of that Pink Himalayan kind.

  • @colonelburton8451
    @colonelburton8451 5 років тому +15

    I love the irony of Christian Bale crying out "it's useless now, isn't it?" after literally destroying the Terminator franchise.