As much as I’m nourished by the informational content in these dialogues - I’m also SO delighted by the humour. I love it!! And as comedy has always proved - humour is the best aid to memory. So I don’t forget the serious bits. Thank you.
This is so spot on to my experience, I have to replay the dialogue,to hear the validation of my experience for 30 years. Wow!! I was always saying “I am not your mother”. If I let go “heal” I lose myself. So true, that is the realization and resistance. I become invisible again. I so appreciate the two of you bantering and sharing.
Thank you. I had PGD for several years due to the deaths of my parents, about 2 years apart, and the loss of my daughter and divorcing a covert narcissist. I am finally experiencing weeks without that intensity of grief and I’ve found a beautiful home, an incredible job, and strong friendships. My three sons are phenomenal people and they bring me so much joy and comfort. But most of all Jesus heals and restores and helps me to make sense of all this and let go of all that I can’t change. His way is better. Thank you Grannon and Vantnik for the wealth of insight. It’s merciful and liberating yet I also must consciously choose to look ahead, move forward so that I can continue to thrive. And most of all, never go back to mental enslavement by one w NPD.
Oh goodness… the damage it causes our brains is insane. After 4 years of navigates and yes the OCD behaviour still… (but not as much) this makes so much sense. Navigating relationships after NPD injury Is proving very difficult also… we are not who we once were, before the relationship, we are not of what what we are in that relationship and the loss of self becomes very real! I myself have developed huge relationship anxiety and an abandonment wound that I am in therapy to heal. Everything about me has changed… and rebuilding a new version of myself is proving difficult but not impossible?! 😳 Thank you both x
Just blow my mind it is exactly like that, I heard you in the other videos, and after 7 month of separation, after teraphy I was able to understand that was not real finally I understand
This was so well said, Sam please continue speaking and Richard keep asking questions. I can review my experience and agree with all the steps you mentioned, but this repeated validation "All of it wasn't real" was comforting to hear. I was lucky, I had that said to me early in recovery and it woke me up. I think the answer to the chronic sadness has been accepting the loss of self and time. Ok. I need to build me again. Individuation can happen again! Thanks Guys for continuing to help so many who will listen.
His mother did it to him.He did that to me.There was a horrific doublebind about caring for another.I still struggle years later.I will have to be dead in his reality.Live in mine.Difficult. But when i had cancer awhile ago,i was GLAD he wasnt there to be victim competing with the ugly worthless sick burden and use me for selfgain.
Along with understanding oneself, this unique insight offers practical knowledge and guidance for people recovering health and wellness while evolving through the murky labyrinth of these relational dynamics - vital resourcing from both social and self care/medical perspectives. Thank you both very much.
Prolonged grief disorder. 13 years and running😭. No end in sight. Tried everything. I can pretend and consciously waln through events but my sense of hope is completely gone.
I in the begin finding out what he was tried to educate him with what I had found he just turned it on me calling me a nark and everything so in the end I self sabotage and told him I had found someone else I hadn't but just told him what he wanted to hear he came to my house 12am screaming disgusting abuse while our 5 children was asleep the police where called and I'm hoping he will now move on sadly to the next victim 😢
It is as if the narcissist is a big magnet that magnetizes the iron filings around him, and if you do not want to be magnetized (like him) you will have to become a piece of wood !... a difficult situation. true ؛ artifacts are well known in radiology
How is it possible everything is not real except the pain from walking away? What if we were to tell ourselves that pain isn't real either? Might that make it easier and more logical?
I went through evrrything he said..that's the life i was introduced to by my mother..away in another country trying to cleanse myself off of all the toxicity and darkness she poured on to me..wheww she has a bible and goes to church..then God must punish her..she has been a miserable woman all her life and she has wished worse for me sickkkk
With regards to this: When I was a kid I remember some shows portrayed a corrupted version of friendship in some sense (love unconditionally even if they are toxic). Although different cultures have different conceptions of friendship.
As much as I’m nourished by the informational content in these dialogues - I’m also SO delighted by the humour. I love it!! And as comedy has always proved - humour is the best aid to memory. So I don’t forget the serious bits. Thank you.
Gentlemen, I've nerver seen such a PERFECT description as this one about what had happened to me. That IS MY CLOSURE. Thanks a Lot!
This is so spot on to my experience, I have to replay the dialogue,to hear the validation of my experience for 30 years. Wow!! I was always saying “I am not your mother”. If I let go “heal” I lose myself. So true, that is the realization and resistance. I become invisible again. I so appreciate the two of you bantering and sharing.
Thank you. I had PGD for several years due to the deaths of my parents, about 2 years apart, and the loss of my daughter and divorcing a covert narcissist. I am finally experiencing weeks without that intensity of grief and I’ve found a beautiful home, an incredible job, and strong friendships. My three sons are phenomenal people and they bring me so much joy and comfort. But most of all Jesus heals and restores and helps me to make sense of all this and let go of all that I can’t change. His way is better. Thank you Grannon and Vantnik for the wealth of insight. It’s merciful and liberating yet I also must consciously choose to look ahead, move forward so that I can continue to thrive. And most of all, never go back to mental enslavement by one w NPD.
Oh goodness… the damage it causes our brains is insane. After 4 years of navigates and yes the OCD behaviour still… (but not as much) this makes so much sense. Navigating relationships after NPD injury Is proving very difficult also… we are not who we once were, before the relationship, we are not of what what we are in that relationship and the loss of self becomes very real! I myself have developed huge relationship anxiety and an abandonment wound that I am in therapy to heal. Everything about me has changed… and rebuilding a new version of myself is proving difficult but not impossible?! 😳
Thank you both x
Brains love to loop. Brains latch onto repetitive thoughts. It seems our brains are designed for thought addictions.
Another vaknin video, another existential crisis. Thank you professor for keeping me humble
Just blow my mind it is exactly like that, I heard you in the other videos, and after 7 month of separation, after teraphy I was able to understand that was not real finally I understand
Really mind blowing!!!🤯
This was so well said, Sam please continue speaking and Richard keep asking questions. I can review my experience and agree with all the steps you mentioned, but this repeated validation "All of it wasn't real" was comforting to hear. I was lucky, I had that said to me early in recovery and it woke me up.
I think the answer to the chronic sadness has been accepting the loss of self and time. Ok. I need to build me again. Individuation can happen again! Thanks Guys for continuing to help so many who will listen.
I love the banter btwn these two! 😅 Cracked me up
I've been grieving the loss of my youthful looks. My friends from the past and my daughter moving away. I feel like I have prolonged grieving
A brilliant and helpful breakdown Sam. It is so backwards and unfortunate quality content like this would ever be shadow banned.
His mother did it to him.He did that to me.There was a horrific doublebind about caring for another.I still struggle years later.I will have to be dead in his reality.Live in mine.Difficult. But when i had cancer awhile ago,i was GLAD
he wasnt there to be victim competing with the ugly worthless sick burden and use me for selfgain.
I appreciate you guys so much . Thanks
👏👏👏👏 Muchas gracias, Sam. 👏👏👏👏Muchas gracias, Richard. 💐.
This video gave me immense closure, thank you! 45:05
This is such important insight for understanding oneself. Thank you both so very much.
Along with understanding oneself, this unique insight offers practical knowledge and guidance for people recovering health and wellness while evolving through the murky labyrinth of these relational dynamics - vital resourcing from both social and self care/medical perspectives. Thank you both very much.
This is mindblowing...i always told me ex partner that he felt like a mother to me....makes soooo much sense now
Prolonged grief disorder. 13 years and running😭. No end in sight. Tried everything. I can pretend and consciously waln through events but my sense of hope is completely gone.
You need a med
Thank you. Brilliant.
Thanks for this.
I in the begin finding out what he was tried to educate him with what I had found he just turned it on me calling me a nark and everything so in the end I self sabotage and told him I had found someone else I hadn't but just told him what he wanted to hear he came to my house 12am screaming disgusting abuse while our 5 children was asleep the police where called and I'm hoping he will now move on sadly to the next victim 😢
It is as if the narcissist is a big magnet that magnetizes the iron filings around him, and if you do not want to be magnetized (like him) you will have to become a piece of wood !... a difficult situation.
true ؛ artifacts are well known in radiology
Great talk
Thank you
Amazing
How is it possible everything is not real except the pain from walking away? What if we were to tell ourselves that pain isn't real either? Might that make it easier and more logical?
Very interesting
I went through evrrything he said..that's the life i was introduced to by my mother..away in another country trying to cleanse myself off of all the toxicity and darkness she poured on to me..wheww she has a bible and goes to church..then God must punish her..she has been a miserable woman all her life and she has wished worse for me sickkkk
How do you 'force' yourself not to think about something/someone? Isn't this the polar bear problem? :)
With regards to this: When I was a kid I remember some shows portrayed a corrupted version of friendship in some sense (love unconditionally even if they are toxic). Although different cultures have different conceptions of friendship.
Yes yes and yes
That’s crazy!
Is this why he never calls you by your name?
Classic red flag eh.
@inglesinamafiorentina no nor can I..
Thank you guys! This is brilliant! When will you come to Zagreb?
When you organize an event there.
@@nothingnessnonarcissism I'll try. How can I contact you?
The mother of all Disneylands.
🤣
Now featuring the world's most dangerous rollercoaster: it's called Shared Fantasy!
How can I fix my own separation and individuation phase being a victim of abuse ?
Watch the Narcissistic Abuse Healing playlist on my main channel.
Death has a beautiful face.
17:12 😂😂😂😂🤣🤣🤣
what are lycans?
Bpd