What Life's Really Like as a Middle-Aged INTROVERT
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- Опубліковано 1 жов 2024
- I've been this way for over 40 years but people still don't understand why I like being alone so much.
Timothy J. Ward
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Watch Part 2 of the stream here: • Introvert Stream (Part 2)
#introvert #introverts #timothyjward
I love being a introvert! Less people less problems. 🤷🏽♀️
Truth be told 💯 love being alone...
Crazy how that works !
💯💯💯🙏🏿🙏🏿🙏🏿
I felt this fr
Yep! In the FAMOUS words of Mr. Neely Fuller: "NO CONTACT NO CONFLICT." 🧘🏽♀️
“Just because I’m an introvert doesn’t mean I don’t like people. I love people. I love human interaction. I just don’t need it as much as most people” My man 🤙🏾
Pin this comment cause this is me💯💯💪🏾💪🏾🫡
Yep. It's fun for an hour or so, and then I'm done. Everybody just starts repeating themselves, and I don't see th point....and I'm exhausted.
Make sense 😊✌
Shalom Greetings Grandrising! I use organic Reishi as a stress medium and when I offer cups of coffee and tea infused it depends on how many people are receptive to my products that will let me no to begin closing and have people remember that diamond is the #1 Lifestyle in the world then head out on my Mongoose Threshold. Peace love and light from LVNOLA and Bulbancha Thank you for the content
Indeed, the same....!
“I don't hate people.....I just feel better when they're not around.” ― Charles Bukowski
That sums up my attitude. Hail Bukowski!
😀 💯
😂right
😆 lol
🤷🏽
I am a senior citizen introvert and accepted it
Recently retired, moved across the country to a rural mountain area and loving it. Riding my bike and walking the country roads- feel like I in paradise.
My goal away from ppl grid life
Good! Enjoy it! 👍👍👍
Heaven for sure...
Hope you bring your gun with you out there fiesty one!!😍 Becarefulout there living your best life!🙏
🙌🏾
I'm done with humans. I've tried opening up and extending myself as a human with compassion but after years and years of being treated like dog s**" I've gotten fed up and pulled away from people. Not all people are bad but I'm to the point that I don't care to figure it out. I love staying to myself and I love the peace that comes with it. I'm sorry n a better space now by myself now than when I was when I socialized with people. People are disrespectful and their hearts are very nasty. No thank you. I love my peace.
I absolutely agree!!
💯💯👍👍
💯💯
Agreed
I'm 61... So bold to say I do not hang with anyone over 20 years.... people steal from me my whole life every chance they get...... Not a fan of man... But I'm nice to those I have to deal with
...
I think introverts may be empaths that’s prolly why we love being alone, being around people I take on their energy and I feel drained by the end of the encounter, I would rather be alone in my zen.
Interacting with humans
Is draining
💯💯✊✊👍👍
Yep 👍🏽
Yes
Nah I get drained trying to pretend like I care what they are saying "I never asked to see pictures of your dogs, I don't care'
I'm definitely not an empath
It’s sooooo refreshing to know I’m not alone!! It’s so great to hear from other introverts! Everything you explained is exactly how I am. I absolutely love being alone! I don’t socialize much either. I just don’t enjoy it or really want to.
That's funny though. What you said. "refreshing to know I'm not alone" It seems like even in introversion, we want to know that we are not the only ones. Like, that's where the myth comes from, that everybody has to be around people all the time. I think Darwinianly we must have evolved to stick together to stay alive and so loneliness seems to be subconsciously as scary as death itself for people. But still some of us seems to need others less than some do.
I'm just like you. Never desired friends. Don't really care about socializing either. Society wants to tell us something is "wrong", but nothing is wrong... we just don't have the same interests as whoever made these extroverted rules up
Melissa is my big sis name and I completely agree. I wanted to have friends and be liked and loved but it seems like every time I put myself out there I got hurt. Now that I have been by myself besides my children around I have gotten use to it. Now I do not like to mingle or be around a lot of people I truly enjoy being by myself and just having my babies around. I have a lover but he’s always busy. If someone would told me that I would enjoy being by myself when I was younger like in my 20s and my teens I wouldn’t believe them but now I really do I really do enjoy being by myself I don’t have to worry about getting my feelings hurt I don’t have to worry about offending anyone I don’t have to worry about if someone really likes me or not all that’s gone away because all I have is my company and I enjoy my company and I enjoy my babies they’re all growing up and healthy and brilliant so yeah I’m happy to say I’m an introvert.
100% agree. I love being alone. I love having my solo time. 💖🤗
at what age did you realize you were a introvert?
For years people have told me to go out and enjoy life. They don't understand that coming home, playing some music by myself IS living to me.
Absolutely
I understand you so much!
Exactly! You have your music and I've got my books. Have you composed any music?
@@trishawalsh7832 No, I leave that to the pros. I just listen and try to take in and absorb as much as I can while I can. ; )
Books and Music. Alone. The Best!😎
Being Alone is Natural...we come here alone... we leave alone.. enjoy and accept it.
💯 percent
That's a lie, humans are social creatures
@Jamel Carpenter he's referring to the soul
But living a alone/ lone wolf life is for loosers, even if you are introvert ,live an engaging life , don't be a looser because it's a looser life style
@@zuchotheghost All 'social' means is that we form temporary alliances for mutual benefit.
I am a female introvert. I don't have a problem being alone. I have been divorced for 9years and haven't started dating. I have been traveling, spending time with family and friends. But mostly I spend time by myself. No drama and I don't argue with myself. I wouldn't want it any other way.
Omg sis from another mother I feel the same way I have been divorced for about 10 or 11 years now and I love love love being by myself lol I was this way since I knew me lol yes a happy and proud 51 yo introvert
You don´t argue with yourself? Lucky you!
Dating isn’t for women over 30 so best just be alone 😂❤
It's not a character flaw, its a character TRAIT. I absolutely love that! Thanks for sharing this, man. I'm right there with you!
PREACH!
Probably an INFJ
I'm just starting to realize this, after a lifetime of being criticized by an extroverted father and being tortured in customer service, public facing jobs. The truth will set you free, lol!
My family acts like introversion is a terminal disease! I’ve always been criticized and told to snap out of it 🤪
@@jayg.2419 Most people do. It's like, "What's wrong with you? Why are you so quiet? Why don't you talk more?" Why are you always by yourself?" 🙄🙄🙄
I talk when I have something meaningful to say. We introverts dislike small talk, at least I know I do. I like deep, meaningful conversations.
I am exactly the same! I rarely get lonely because I love doing my own thing so much! I still cringe to this day when I hear people talk about how hard 2020 was with covid because they couldn't see anyone and they were trapped in their house - that was bliss😅👌🏻 Didn't miss interactions whatsoever😄
Same for me, I work alone and was so glad to be away from people, I spend a lot of my free time reading, listening to music and playing guitar.
I agree completely. It has been difficult for me going back into the office (albeit part time), because of the extroverts coming into my office to chat all-day-long.
@@Mizmilla Yes, same for me!! Love my coworkers but they want to talk all day and it is beyond exhausting😵💫😫
2020 was one of the best years I've ever had. lol
Same here☺️
I'm a 51 year old single, male introvert. Never married or had children and it works for me. I can turn on my extrovert side when it's needed to get on with others but only for a while. I'm a social introvert because I enjoy observing others from a distance and choosing carefully when to become involved in social interactions. I really enjoyed this. Thanks, Tim. Joe. UK.
The way the world is today it’s best that way Keep your circle small.
What you just said touched me as I resonate. That's how I be living.😇
Waggytail I'm 54, and I'm exactly just like you.
I agree with you on so many things you said
Same here man.. I’m 53.., and the same story as yours.., the EXACT STORY!!!!
I'm 43 and I feel the same way! Other people and family problems are energy draining. I cringe when my phone rings. I don't have the energy for the daily grind of a relationship. I don't feel lonely. You are dead on! PLEASE DON'T THROW ME A SURPRISE PARTY! I'd die!
😄
Lol I,m bagging up, I,m feel the same about a surprise party and have for years PLEASE don't throw me one because I will walk out on it.🙂
The only surprise party for me that I'll attend is my funeral.
I think being an introvert as you age probably gets better with time. I say this because as a young person you're always trying to fit in and it's "strange to be an introvert". But when you get older you know your strengths/weaknesses and you don't care about the same BS you did when you were younger; you've "come into" your introversion and embrace it. That's how I feel as I age, and it's great! Things I used to think "what is wrong with me", I now think more attune to "what is wrong with them? I'm good, and have been all along just didn't know it".
True I’m 60. So different than,when I was younger
39 and 💡💡💡💡💡💡
Wow THIS!!! 👆🏾🙌🏾🙌🏾💯🎯🎯🎯
Another truth confirmed.
God made us to be loved however I believe he Gave us an inner strength to seek Solitude. Oh well Some people can worry the horns off a billy 🐐. 😂
I feel like the older I get the less social interaction I crave. Staying in my own lane is more efficient and less time is lost.
Lol @ more efficient
I'm an introvert too (INTJ) and sometimes I just want to be left alone, because my inner world is much more entertaining than talking to people I have nothing in common with.
Fellow INTJ here. I get it. INTJ women are incredibly rare. Sucks living in a world that demands your attention all the time. The whole having a family thing sounds like a nightmare to me. Prefer my own company and desperately crave silence. My dad is the only person I enjoy talking with, and he’s an INTP. My personality is that of Dr. House or Batman Haha
..no one wants anyone boring to talk to! I'm not introvert and I don't want boring people! I'm ambivert.
I can dig it...
Intj, sigma male here, Alone is my style,No problems social. Being yourself is the most important.
yes!!
Introverts tend to be deep thinkers. Observe, analyse and incorporate 😊
I nearly died when he said he would hide from the rescue boat because there are too many people 🤣🤣🤣🤣☠️☠️☠️☠️
🤣🤣🤣🤣i would too
🤣🤣🤣🤣
Crying!🤣🤣🤣
I laughed so hard the whole time🤣🤣😂
😂😂😂
Amen to everything! I work 40 plus hours a week, 48-50 weeks a year and I DO NOT want to spend my free time on "events" or "people". I also don't want society dictating what I should be doing in my free time either. The schools are the worst offenders & anyone who has kids can relate to this one..."Let's send home 30 pages of paperwork and insist it is returned within 2 days". "Let's have a celebration Friday & you must sign up to bring an item". "Let's have football practice an hour earlier tomorrow & we will tell you at 9:00 pm the night before". "If you child plays a sport, every parent must volunteer to work in the concession stand for 2 hours". WTF people?? Leave me alone!! Quit trying to tell this introvert what to do in the VERY limited free time I have. I need my "me" time to stay sane. But no... all these "extroverts" try to ruin our lives on a daily/weekly basis. I know I am being extra dramatic, but after about 15-20 years of this.... if feels extra dramatic. LOL
alot introverts have discipline and alot extroverts are jealous and big narcissists , introverts can turnoff conquer addictions, like smoking and drinking and not needy of attention validation something extroverts envy... you hardly never have drama from another introvert
@@LastREalone I told my friends the same thing that it’s the really extroverted people that cause the most drama because introverts keep to theirselves mostly.
Thats a huge part of why I don’t have kids, I know I could never deal with the school and all the people you are forced to deal with what you have kids, I can barely deal with coworkers.
Bless you Sassy Susie well stated🥰😂
@Sassy Susie you're hilarious. I'm a teacher and my parents always ask: "When can we come to volunteer for....", "Can we plan a....", "What are we going to do for.....". My grade level team used to always invite me for lunch, but after four years they finally realize that: no, I am not a hugger and no I do not want to eat lunch with you. But strangely, I love to spend time with my kinders; maybe they don't suck my energy like adults do.
I’m an introvert and so is my husband. We use each other to get out of going to functions unless they are absolutely necessary, lol.
I need to find a partner like that lol!
@@TimothyWard A mutual friend set us up on a blind date; otherwise we would have never met.
Haha my husband and I do this too 🤣
@@TimothyWard Here I am! lol In London, Uk though :(
This is exactly me and my Girl lol
47 year old female here..moved from my birth state 17 years ago by myself, to a state where I knew no one, no family friends no nothing..long story short lets just say this has been the best 17 years of my life.and more years to come this same way.....#team introvert
Love it. Feel like doing this now!
Feels good to unite here with my introverted people, separately.
Yessss lol
😅
Together apart is nectar
They go hand in hand
I love being introverted, the drama and bad energy that comes with a crowd of people annoys me and makes me physically ill
I agree with you. More peaceful, less drama.🥰
Same. Anxiety would get so high.
Hi Tim, l get energy from being alone. I love driving and spending time watching the birds. I'm living my best life alone. Life is beautiful ! Have a wonderful day everyone.
Life IS beautiful Gail!!!
"Nothing is what I do." I almost choked on my water. Completely agree.
Said it with a straight face too 🤣🤣
Yup. Doing "nothing" is now my favorite activity. It's how I recharge for life's demands.
@@J_Chips and meant it too
💯💯
I like being around people and doing activities together, but I don't like small talk, and most people expect you to talk all the time, then comment or question why you are so quiet. It's like, I don't ask why you talk so much. That would be rude.
It's time to start telling people, don't talk so much!
😂 exactly
YESSSSS
I'm a 53 year old single introvert and I love my life! I can do whatever I want at any time I want, but more importantly, I don't have to do anything that I don't want to. Being single means I don't have to manage anyone's emotions, habits or problems other than my own. My life is peaceful and productive and I wouldn't trade it for the world 😎👍🏽💫💥❤️
Oh my goodness that's just so freeing.....I cry🥲.
So true...
Amen to that from a female introvert
I love being alone. I use to cringe when the phone would ring or a text would come in, I still do. It’s not that I hate people, I just enjoy my own company. I’m an artist and when I’m alone my creativity flows like a river; no blockages. I don’t know, I’ve been called all sorts of names but I enjoy it. I have no problem turning it on and off. I just enjoy contemplating life and creating.
I def feel ya.I'm an artist too "by hobby" and I swear , lately my creative juices have not been flowing because of this damn phone 🤤🤳 When I put my phone down all of a sudden I get creative and start an art project.
@@carolyn6689 careful with getting rid of habits. There’s always something else waiting to fill the void. It might as well be your art!
💯
@@soindifferent_ yes,def true ...I need to focus more on my art ,because it makes me happy and it's a great way to relax .👍🏻💆🏻♀️
I think I may have reached the halfway point in my contacts who are blocked for good! So freeeing! 😁
Most of the BEST conversations I've
Ever had was with "MYSELF"!!
Haha!
I've always said that introverts understand extroverts, but extroverts don't understand introverts.
Deep!
I believe you’re absolutely correct.
...and I just watched a Mandarin learning video in which the guy said exactly that... he said he's an extrovert and doesn't understand introverts!
That’s crazy! I just said this to my mom yesterday. We get y’all but y’all will never get us. I understood this during the pandemic, like I knew it could be hard for extroverted people. I thrived though. I know where my introversion came from. And not as a ‘wo as me’ type of thing, but I have 4 other siblings. My sis is 7 years older and my three brothers never wanted to play with me, so I just got used to playing by myself and being okay with that. I solo travel because most people wouldn’t want to go where I’ve wanted to go. Just bought a 4 bed/2 bathroom house to spread out more, and already people are trying to plan get togethers and asking me when I’m getting a dining room table. 😮💨
I’m thinking, ‘I’m single with no kids. Why would I need a dining room table? 🤔” I don’t want to feel like I have to entertain people. I like being by myself, and I get exhausted by interactions .
Well yeah. Extroverts have more selfish behavior. They only wouldn't understand why no one listens to them. Imho.
I'm an introverted female in my mid 30s and I really felt so understood with this talk. I also can switch my introvert to extrovert occasionally when it's needed but I loveeeee being alone. I literally cannot wait to be back in my own company. Never thought too much about it until I heard this and realized there were other people like me. Thanks for sharing!
I totally get it....why? Because I'm the same way! 💛 I'm over 50 and when you get here, trust me you wont give a damn! 🙂
My wife’s family and friends thought I was in her imagination because I didn’t do social get togethers. I was like Bigfoot, occasional sightings but no definitive proof. I’ll make the effort if there’s a special event but otherwise no. Totally agree with the battery getting drained out in public. My daughter is the same way. Thanks for sharing this.
Hahahaha, like a bigfoot sighting lol
I'm married and feel just like you do. I love socializing with my family, but don't care for socializing with in-laws and coworkers.
I'm right there with u Tim. When u learn how to enjoy your own company, that's all you want to do.
PREACH!
Yup ...it's peaceful...I dint have to argue with ppl ...just be at peace
YES! I honestly feel like it is truly loving yourself.
It is addictive. Once I left my 8 yr situationship my single status is as a honeymoon with myself - never-ending and everyday is my bday. 58 in 2 days. Create your own environment and get some dogs and you’re set!
Bingo! I think people who can't be alone don't even like themselves.
I can converse with people, here and there, but putting up an act for other people makes me tired. I don't care about talking to people. I just focus on my life.
Alot of people in the USA, at 42 have been married and divorced twice,and are financially, in severe debt.Child support and alimony make some guys situation seem like involuntary servitude.You have possibly dodged the bullet.
Introverted, 52yrs old, 2 kids with 1 woman, and debt free! Child support payed!($132,000 worth) Never married ta'boot!
@@drewamasterpiece5268 132k?! Wow! Great job for paying it off and being debt free
But some are thriving financially and raising kids in a healthy relationship..Not being alone and wondering where your next meal is coming from..That would be crazy to them..All about perspective..
@@tylercampbell6365 Absolutely, people are so worried about what could go wrong that they don't see all that could go right.
@@myguychris7739 Could 🔑 😀
People automatically think I'm the life of the party and playboy by my looks. I'm muscular, handsome etc.. I'm actually a loner and introverted. I would love to find a woman for a long term relationship. most are turned off when they find out I'm not the guy they expected based on my looks.
I would quite happily walk around invisible. Bumping into someone I know isn't something I look forward too 🤷. I feel like the older I get the more introverted I become. On my 30th birthday I had a massive party with 150 friends, now at 41 I have like 2 friends and a few assosiates 🤷. I have to say though i'm wwwwaaaayyyy more at peace than i've ever been, I might add I was partying ALOT at 30 so thats proberly why I had so many friends, ha. Sober with 2 friends....wow, how things have changed.
My brother said all his friends went away when he got sober. I think its meant to be. Those that don't serve us fall away.
@@angelgirldebbiejo I can relate to your brother for sure. On the plus side I bet he's more at peace now without all the noise 🙂.
Wait till you get to 48 😏
I wish I had at least 1 female friend than just coworkers. I’m lonely as H since I have zero female friends!
@@PraveenSrJ01 it will happen when you stop worrying about it.
I’m absolutely fine with being an introvert. I have 2 great friends, and that’s it. I go to the movies by myself and love it. My past girlfriends didn’t agree with my lifestyle of only going out to social events once every couple of weeks, most weekends doing my own thing or just with her. Often times I’ve had people ask me if I get bored, I say hell no, I enjoy my own company as weird as that may sound, im content
I love this guy🤣I’m laughing because I can’t believe there’s someone out there just like me but a man version…😱now I know I’m not the only one and I’m not crazy as people, friends and family think I am🤔this is such a weight off my shoulders….work in progress😅🤣🤣🤣
I am 33 year old woman and we are so much alike!! Lol. I consider myself a combo introvert/extrovert. I like being alone, but I also like being around people. "However" it has to be people who company I enjoy, are positive, and we have things and/or our personalities in common. If I do not have anything in common with you than it's really hard for me to connect. Outgoing extroverts drain me. They need constant attention and I have none to give usually.
youre whats called an ambivert
@@ChibagamingJP Yep probably more like me. I grew up very quiet and always kept to myself. As an adult I discovered I do like and enjoy people, just has to be the particular right person to be social with. I have 0 issues doing things by myself or with people.
Same here!
Yes sweetie you are a ambivert....so am i and i love it!!! Enjoy that balance
Extroverts are "on" all day, to the point where they wear me out. As an introvert, I can be "on" for brief periods. When I used to play in bands, I was the most outgoing person on stage, but when the gig was over I turned it off like a light switch. I just wanted to pack up and go home. Whereas my extrovert drummer friend would be hanging out and chatting with audience members, in no hurry at all. People who knew me as quiet and introverted couldn't believe how animated I was on stage.
Had the same kind of life for a while; lead singer/guitarist, animated as you can get on stage, toured a fair bit...but after the show I was the only band member who hated going to parties. I just wanted to hide in a hotel room.
OMG....if this ain't me all the WAY!!!! 😀🙌🏾🙌🏾💯
@@JohnLudi - exactly, John!
As a professor, I will verify I am exactly like that. When I teach nobody ever believes that I’m actually an introvert. But when it’s over it really is like a light switch. And I’m drained by all the people I need my time alone
This is an interesting take on band members, because as women we're taught to never marry musicians, because they're known to be hoorish in general.
🤣🤣 That's funny what you said about the island, I'm in my 60's and an introvert, I love it, we have marvelous traits, we're peaceful people, drama free zone, we're content, we search out information, like to explore. We like nature, put me in an area with trees, leaves, plants and flowers and I'll find a use for them making oils, tea, etc. When I do spend time around others, I want it to be meaningful and productive, because I'm always open to learn from others.
I know this is two years old, but I hope you read that you describe me perfectly write down to the age.😊
People mistake introversion with insecurity.
Introverted individuals are so misunderstood and judged as being antisocial people. I get really irritated with large groups of people and I come to understand being alone with self is totally who I am. Great conversation!
well i was bullied throughout my childhood years, i got used to being alone and different. eventually you prefer it, rather than be in a situation in which you're the odd one and and people find reasons to pick on you. Even my own family did this.
Life as an extrovert is great if you "fit in. If you don't, being around people is a living hell.
This is SO true. Usually us introverts have interests and things that make us different from most people. And I definitely can relate to being made fun of by family members, that's why in adulthood I keep my distance from some of them.
F People
Right on!
Exactly. It’s all about validation and fitting in for most extroverts.
I personally don’t want to fit in.
I want more,than enough money and seclusion.
Im an introvert, my daughter is an introvert. We make no apologies for being so. I love my disposition. I create my boundaries and the people I care about, I explain the levels of my introversion. Once they understand, it's all good. Long story short...I'm not coming because there's to many people who want to talk all night 🤣
Love it! That’s what I tell my family and friends. There’s too many people, I get overwhelmed. I pick up to many spirits, there are too many personalities. 😂 but it’s true.
This is so me! However, my daughter is an extrovert just like her father. My anxiety is on 10 during her birthday party because she wants everyone and their Mama to be there.
I'm with you being by yourself is fun. I sometimes just feel I'm wasting my precious alone time when I'm hanging out with people.
I felt everything you said in this video in my SOUL!!! This was so refreshing to hear because I always feel like there's something wrong with me for wanting to be alone most of the time. I don't meet many people who understand this level of introversion. I just don't have a desire to socialize much, and I HATE small talk. I've been called a recluse, hermit, boring...that it's "not normal" to spend so much time by myself. A couple of people have told me I have the personality traits of a serial killer because i'm quiet and keep to myself most of the time. It's just peaceful being alone, not having to worry about other peoples' feelings, judgements or expectations. People can be overwhelming for me.
I've tried being more social and it just felt fake, like I was wearing a "people-person" mask. I feel like I'm a person that requires patience if you want my time. Because when I do finally reach out, it will be sincere. My efforts cannot be coerced. It's a pet peeve of mine when people tell me what I "should" or "need" do with my time or my life...especially when I have no desire to. Even if I begin to, it's like, at least give me the space to explore it when I'm ready. I do NOT appreciate the peer pressure.
Thank you for sharing. This is fascinating stuff to hear from people you'd probably never hear from lol
"i've tried being more social and it just felt fake," just like social media...to be social is to to be with the fake Sh..it
You just popped up in my feed today. Never seen you before but the introversion thing, I hear you!! It took me decades to figure out what my issue was and I’m still learning to accept it. I look at myself through the eyes of others and I’m learning to stop doing that. Hearing you express yourself the way you do is very refreshing!
I'm indebted to the UA-cam algorithm for sending my videos your way lol. It's always nice to her from someone who is going through similar things in life.
Same here. I've never seen him before, but I plan to tune in and subscribe. 😀
@@notmebutyou8350 Same here!😄
I met my two best friends 11 years ago. We respect each others peace and privacy. We are 3 very different people but we respect one anothers boundaries. We only talk if the other person wants to talk too or wants to listen. We meet each other every 2-3 months but the relationship is still honest and strong. When it comes to the family situation it's different though. I love my respectful and supportive family.... but damn I want to be alone from time to time.
My mom, if she sees me, Always starts talking.... always.... it's so annoying. Sometimes I just go for a walk to escape human bullshit, even though i am fortunate having a good family.
It's nothing personal.
I just want to be alone more often than many other people. As a kid I liked to be alone. But school etc... tried their best to make me feel bad about it.
😂😂😂 I didn't want to say it on here but my mother is like this too.. I'm cracking up rn.. I love her, I do, but.. 😕😂 They just don't understand.
One of my best friends once said in her older years, "Oh, I pray nobody calls me." She wasn't depressed. She was a great reader and conversationalist with another person or a small group. Having to talk to numerous people on the phone and listen to all their gossip was a drain. I totally understand.
Guess what is worse? When you're walking along and the phone rings. How disruptive!
Woman mid fifties...I've been a social introvert since a child. I love my own company, I go out often, love going to new restaurants and shows but I like going alone. Life is beautiful when your living your own life. I don't deal with employees outside of work either.
Introvert dating/ group meet ups would be fun....love the videos!
Did you ever used to have hang ups with going to restaurants alone? I am in my early 30s and I have only been to a restaurant twice by myself.. it's the interaction with the waiter/waitress that gives me anxiety and also feeling like I stick out like a sore thumb being the only table with just one person.. I definitely want to get out of my comfort zone a little bit though, any tips? I went on a whole solo beach camping trip last summer (when I went to 2 restaurants alone) and I'm going back to the same area next month and want to go to all the restaurants I didn't have the courage to go to the first time!
@@BuddhaPepper I was uncomfortable going to restaurants or concerts alone. I have learned to deal. As a single woman, I get stared at when dining alone. Silly as it is, people wonder why you are sitting there alone. I prefer going out with friends but sometimes I want to go somewhere and nobody else wants to go. Why miss an opportunity to try a new restaurant or venue? I suggest try going to cafes alone, then lunch at a diner alone, branch out from there. Also it is cool to make a new friend who is into those things. Not all the time, but a standby. :)
Hello Buddha Pepper...here are a couple of suggestions: check out the menu online so you know what you want the first time the waiter comes over, bring a book, magazine or ipad/ phone and use that it you need some distraction and the timing is key, after breakfast or lunch rush. Like 2-4. Get a window seat and enjoy ppl watching... sometimes I work on bills. Key here is to don't miss out on ENJOYING YOUR LIFE!
It’s absolutely true
you can only, be your ‘true self’
when you’re completely alone
It’s so freeing
@@BuddhaPepper I am 46 and when I was your age, I felt the same way but comfortability comes with time. I went to a restaurant yesterday and looked around. I noticed there were 4 people dining alone. I started to notice this is much more common than we think. When we are alone we assume everyone is staring but most are not even noticing or caring. And if they are staring, so what! We should learn to not care what people think of us.
Try bringing a laptop or something to do and that may help you feel more comfortable. Start by going to cafes or quick lunch places like Panera because that's where you are more likely to see others dining alone. Then once you get comfy doing that you will notice it's easier to branch out.
During the "lockdown" I was so at peace. I'm not minimizing what anyone went through or what happened at all. But being by myself, or if I need to stay home...no problem, not invited to the party....no problem, running my errands alone during lunch...fantastic!
I understand totally! The lockdown didn't impact me internally at all.
The lockdown didn't affect me at all.
The only difference for me was I was required to wear a mask not a problem.
Catching the replay and 😂😂😂 These points are so true. In my 30s with no kids and this is sooo me. Gotta be mentally prepared to go out days in advance and definitely "I'm busy doing nothing" is part of my motto. The last time I really went out was to see Isaiah Saldivar preach back in February (it was a nice road trip I took alone, didn't really speak to anyone at the event, except the clerk at the inn I stayed at) and had lunch with my mother for Mother's day. That's it. I work alone and interact with the clients I clean for but when I'm home, I just like it quiet. It would be nice to meet someone but as each year passes and knowing I don't leave the house much, I'm becoming more content with the idea that I just may end up being alone til Jesus comes back. 😆 In my 20s I drank allllll the time (it made me too social) and enjoyed hookah. Towards my 30s I smoked weed but ended up meeting Jesus and being delivered from the spirit of addiction. I still use CBD; as a house cleaner it makes things easier. After being in abusive relationships and other unfruitful relationships and friendships in my 20s, the peace and quiet I have now is great. I do live with my mother though who is an extrovert and doesn't understand why I am the way I am but 🤷🏽♀️ Thank you for these streams, you're super funny and you have a great speaking voice.
Thank you for sharing Relis! And for your kind words.
Wow you sound like me except I still partake in ganja but I know Yeshua can take any addiction away 🙏🏾💕
@@Rastasoul1 Indeed he can 🙏
Beautiful words and best wishes for you from a fellow soul in Ireland 🇮🇪
@@relisbetrel 🥹🙏🏾💕
I date myself. I always go to places I want to go. I do have to pay....but I’m guaranteed to go home with myself and I get LUCKY every time because I always get my whole bed to myself! Lol Truth!❤️ great video Tim!😀
".... enjoying doing nothing." Yay Somebody finally said it. 😄
This is so me. I dreaded going to birthday parties when I was a kid. All my problems disappear once I come home to my peace and quiet.
I was a bartender for 10 years. Have now been in retail management for 22 years. In my mid 50's. Work drains me physically,
mentally and emotionally. I can flip into extrovert mode at times, normal mode at times. But I find that I cherish my times
as an introvert ....... as my time to recharge my batteries. If that makes sense. Its ok to be us.
Yeah, I've forced myself to be "social" just through peer pressure or trying to date or work or w/e. I've been through the social guantlet and I find myself still and introvert naturally. You can flip that switch, and even enjoy it at times, but you always want to introvert it seems like
Oh my goodness I feel for you.
I am 49 and have a similar work history - not through overt choice, but rather because a job is a job. But I can't say that I ever enjoyed said jobs. Satisfying at times, yes - but no enjoyment. And like you, I found retail and pub/hotel work draining to the point of being excruciating.
Only a few months ago (via Dr Ramani on UA-cam), I heard it said that while extraverts are energised through social interaction, introverts are (yes!) drained and depleted. Seems so obvious to me now that it's been clarified - but to hear a compassionate psychologist articulate this was both affirming and healing. So your statement makes complete sense.
The challenge, I guess, is in accepting things 'as they are', and finding a way to care less about other's opinions...
@@TW-ps2cr yes. All very true. I plan (?) On leaving retail management at the end of this year. I am trying to sort out what that looks like at this juncture. Theres a lot if us I'm sure. Lolove.
It takes a special woman to love an introvert. An introvert man needs his space. When I come in from work, my wife and I spend time together cooking and eating the meal. Then we will share time in front of the TV or outside, but she understands that I need my alone time. So, I have my man room where I go to "be alone" like you said. It's not impossible for an introvert to have a serious relationship, you just need to find the right one to have that relationship with.
When my son and l lived together we had an agreement to say nothing to each other for an hour after coming home from work. We both need to decompress
I was embarrassed by the small number of friends I have compared to people that have hundreds of followers on social media and always video themselves with lots of friends doing lots of cool fun stuff but then I found out most of the stuff you see is completely staged for the camera.
Anyone can make a social media account and appear social. Most people want you to only see what THEY want you to see; they want to manipulate how you perceive them through social media. I was never into social media and seeing people posing or performing for pictures seems stranger and stranger to me
I used to be friendly with a woman who would always want to pose for selfies with other people at events and she would post the photos on Facebook. It gave the impression that she was a great social life but it was fake
I know so many people who literally run themselves ragged going here and going there and going here and going there… they’re desperate to fit in and desperate to stay busy and they can never sit still and they never feel peace and what are they running from I ask myself. I can’t imagine how awful it would be to be one of those people. I love solitude and being alone and don’t know how in the world people marry. It seems so completely unnatural. Spending 24/7 with someone else would be a nightmare. Love to do nothing, read a book play with my cats watch Amazon sit on my patio and try to figure out where we go when our physical body dies. I think the only reason I feel a sense of loneliness is because society programs us to go and to do and to be around people and so sometimes I think I confuse the feeling of loneliness when in reality it’s just me feeling a little bit self-conscious or invalidated or maybe I’m invalidating myself or feel less than because I just don’t wanna have large groups of people around me. The societal norm sometimes gets in my head and makes me feel as if being an introvert is wrong or weird and that I should try and fight it. Most of my friends got tired of me canceling plans but at the time I didn’t even know I was an INFJ or an introvert but now I get it. They just weren’t my people. I’m good with phone friendships! That and UA-cam comments that’s all the socialization I need LOL.
@@thirstonhowellthebird Problem is when you old and frail or sick. It becomes very difficult to do things without others to help.
As long as you stay healthy being alone is fantastic imo. Trouble is we get old and sick...well unless something worse happens.
More countries are considering euthanasia so at least us loners can go out with some control over our own matters and dignity.
Anyhoo, this got dark.
@@404errorpagenotfound.6 I suffer badly with chronic pain and I don't sleep much. I need a good bit of time alone to do things at my own pace. I do like to spend some time with other people but too much socialising wipes me out
As a introvert I have to stop being a idealists and a perfectionist. Nothing is perfect and I can’t control everything. Being uncomfortable sometimes allows you to grow.
YEs!!! I keep saying I have to make myself uncomfortable. I have found myself to be stagnant because I am in my comfort zone.
What is not perfect to you ... would be perfect to someone else .... I know that sounds a bit crazy .... but just tell yourself ..... I did pretty good with this ..... and move on with it !
Lol...I'm 50 yrs old and I swear I get more introverted the older I get.😅👋🏻Yesterday I was at the grocery store and I saw this lady in the line I was going to get into and I just realized she was someone I worked with many years ago ...I turned my head real quick and went down the aisle to go to the next register instead of passing by her.I couldn't remember if I got along with her so it was super awkward and I didn't want to find out ... 😂🙈 I just snuck by her in the next line and scooted up so she didn't see me.I made it out of the store without confronting her.
On my birthday my ex thought it would be nice to eat at a nice restaurant, while waiting for dinner the entire restaurant staff walked to our table singing happy birthday being who I am, i ran to the nearest exit.
😂😂 Every time I see that happening I cringe!
Oh boy I know that feeling. Being the center of attention. No thank you !
I would have DIED. I want to run & hide when I see that happen to OTHER people even! I can't imagine if it were happening to me
I am 50 year old introvert. I have worked from home for 10 years. I have learned to be a self-sufficient and highly functional introvert. I was very much an introvert in high school and college. I don't miss going out with co-workers for drinks and do not miss the drama of "friends". It does bother me that I won't have help when I am older but oh well. I am married and thankfully, my husband is an introvert too. I am thankful for that. Be what you are and own what you are. Don't let peoples' lack of understanding make you feel uncomfortable. I can socialize when need be but not my preferred activity.
I feel you on the getting older and not having anyone to help you. I’m 36 and I already think about that myself. Although I have 12 kids, 6 bio and 6 step, I don’t think they’re going to care much about me when I get older because I hardly have a relationship with them now because I’m extremely introvert. I literally live in the house and may not see my own children because we’re all in our rooms all day and perfectly fine with being so 😩😩😩😩
How tf have you worked from home for 10 yrs? I’ve been wanting that since I was 22 back in 2012.
@@KurosakiLuvar01 I've been working from home since 2006. Gotta love the internet. Lots of passive income opps out here. Good luck!
@@KurosakiLuvar01 me too
I have been thinking of working from home. How do I pick without getting scammed?
This was nice to hear. I am an introvert but really lonely since my husband died 11 years ago. My son has autism and doesn't leave the house or have a friend. We are so alone.
💛💛💛
We are the same , my son is the same . Sending hugs from Canada 🇨🇦
@@dchrysostom Thank you for telling me that. That makes me feel less weird.
Extroverts need people around them because they feel uncomfortable in their own company.. which is probably why they can't understand introverts. They pity us as though we are suffering being alone as they would be..lol. I pity them for depending on other people for their own happiness.
Yep they are codependent and more than likely narcissist, not always but its more often than not they are
🔥💯🔥💯
Extroverts aren’t codependent. Yes we love to talk, be out/about, and enjoy the world for the good, bad, and the ugly. As it is easy for an introvert be an introvert is the same vice or vesa. But being codependent lol…funny.
Extroverts just don't understand. How could they?
I am a 68-year-old woman who had a similar upbringing. The only time I felt different was when I was around family, coworkers, and friends who were extroverts! It is funny to me, extroverts are not always comfortable around a quiet person, they seem to think YOU need to be more outspoken, more talkative, more...., more like them. Bless their hearts! :) When I was much younger I wanted to fit in, I wanted to be a part of a group. These days, I realize I don't need a group, I am my own group! When I want to socialize, I socialize, when I don't, I don't, it simple as that. To thine own self be true! Tim, and to everyone who is an Introvert, do you, be you. We were not born to be anyone or anything else but ourselves. Anyway, I am enjoying learning about and understanding my introvert personally, which is really cool! Check out these books they are a blessing: Quiet by Susan Cain and The Introvert Advantage.
Tim, I know exactly what you mean about not being able to walk up to someone and start talking to them. Since I'm not into small talk, I can't even think of anything to say to people. I think most people are shallow, so, with the exception of the few close friends I've had for years and years, I don't even have an interest in people.
@BooBoo Bear I always draw a blank when it comes to small talk too, it doesn't come easy to me at all. Uncomfortable!
I hate small talk - that’s why i don’t talk to people lol
Imagine walking up to a stranger and asking them the meaning of life
“NOTHING IS WHAT I DO, I ENJOY DOING NOTHING”””” MANNNNNNNN IM SO GLAD IM NOT THE ONLY ONE THAT FEELS THIS WAY😩🤣🤣👌🏽👌🏽👌🏽👌🏽👌🏽👌🏽😭😭😭😭😭 that’s why i feel like I don’t know what my purpose is in life (36) because everything that makes money involves human interaction 😭😭😭😭😭
I am an introvert and struggle working in teams, I even hate small talk in the office. I wish I could work in a lab alone doing my thing but I don’t have the education for that, if only I could retire today, but I am 47. I am unable to speak up at work, not sure if due to being an introvert and scared to open the door to communication or because of my ptsd.
“How was your Weekend!!??” used to wither my soul. Other running themes were that I was low class, poor, uneducated, so on. Really?
I have the same issues! I have anxiety and don’t like to talk to coworkers the best thing that works for me is keep conversation polite, short and to the point. I hate talking on the phone too so sometimes I will plan what im going to say and write it down before I call. You can get by in life with social anxiety by having short friendly conversations. I had very bad anxiety when I was younger and sometimes barely talked, I only felt comfortable talking to my family and a few friends but I’ve learned coping skills so I can be social enough to keep a job.
@@MelModica i am the same way, even writing emails gives me anxiety, wish you the best! My coworkers keep slamming my car doors and I haven’t been able to speak up and tell them to please don’t that. They are going to break my doors- I am a paralegal so have to bring the attorneys to the office after court. I regret this job.
I feel like you're telling my story, from childhood to 20s. Now I'm in my mid 30s and realize how much of an introvert I am.
I love going for my hike everyday, alone. No one on the mountain but me. I live alone and work from home. My very few friends live states away. I love my alone time. 🌻🌻 people put me down because I am not married or dating anyone. Like there is something wrong with me🌻🌻
Same here 😊
There’s nothing wrong with being single. You do you.
People think i am snobbish or unfriendly but i am introverted. I am most comfortable when i am alone and not dealing with drama.
60 yr old introvert here and loving it! You might as well of been describing me when you were describing yourself, Tim.
i'm so tired of this society as an introvert people consider me to be rude or weird or loose respect very quick for me because i'm not a sociable person and don't do what they expect
Keep being different, we will get nowhere in life if we do what everyone else is doing!
@ Opie Mac You're speaking to a mirror, in other words I feel the same way 100%. It seems as if most people make you out to be the villain in a sense just because you don't operate like most of them. But I'm cool with it, I'll be that 🙂. The crazy part is most perceive you have no life nor have people who still want you (dating wise) or be around you and shit just because of this personality trait. The nerve 🤔😌. Glad I stumbled across this video and comments like yours today, never know who you might touch.....
Don't be sick just develop a don't care attitude and it will help you alot..Am also introvert and hehe was blessed with a resting face so my face is a turn off to many but I don't care, I live my life and I don't care whether people like me or hate me I just don't care....
@@cikuciku2355 THATS A GOOD ATTITUDE YOURE OUT OF THE PRISON OF WORRYING WHAT OTHER PEOPLE THINK OF YOU I LOVE YOU WHATS A RESTING FACE
I understand. I actually told a co-worker recently that I could telework permanently and I would be fine because I’m just not a social person. She seemed offended, probably because she is one of the chatty Kathy’s in the office.
Tim didn’t come to play lol. This describes me so well, thank you for sharing.
No problem Mercedes! I know there are so many of us like this.
I was an extrovert. I was also very nice and friendly. I got mistreated by people so many times that I wish to be by myself or with my small family now.
The stars finally aligned for me a year ago and now I own my own home with no one to ruin it and plenty of free time. I've never been lonely. But was painfully emotionally attached to a woman about 12 years ago. Thankfully, I have healed emotionally and am content and grateful for peace and quiet in my home every time I see the continual chaos in my family member's relationships. And I have electric guitars, a pedal board, a nice Marshall tube amp and speaker cabinet in my living room. I practice and enjoy getting better every day.
I'm 55 Brotha, No Wife No Kids No Girlfriends Just Laying-low And Avoiding Everybody, Living My Bachelor's Lifestyle No Women No Kids Just Peace And Quiet Amen God Is AWESOME !!
Hey Your Focus As A Brotha On Introverted Lifestyle Is Absolutely AWESOME Family !! Keep Up Your AWESOME Grind MEGASTAR🙏🏾🙏🏾🙏🏾🙏🏾
Honestly, wish I was you mate, enjoy
Thank you, UA-cam algorithm! 30 year old introvert and I felt this to my core. Not too active on social media and enjoy a quiet, private life. Littlefinger from GOT had a phenomenal quote about being private and keeping your moves cloaked to a degree.
Phenomenal samurai background by the way!
I feel the same when it comes to work…..I feel like I have to be more extrovert to deal with coworkers, meetings, & bosses. But after work, leave me be. I don’t like attending the Christmas party and any after- work/weekend activities with coworkers because that is MY TIME OFF. They already get 40 hours a week from me. 😀
whats the point of adding toxic dangerous people in your life just for the sake of it?
Man, you hit the nail on the head. Like you are 💯 about us introverts. I'm like I can't believe how you explain exactly how I've been ever since I can remember. Thank you for stepping up and creating content on us introverts. 🙏
No problem! I'm here for us introverts lol!
“Nothing is what I do” ✋🏼 Lol!
Over 50 introvert life only gets better.
I was well over 50 before I realized I trend towards being introspective. I matured into it over time. I like being out of the house, but my interactions need to be meaningful. I am very communicative, AND selective about where I and how I circulate my energy. Observing is often just fine with me, or just being left in solitude. The pandemic provided me more insight into this aspect of my personality. Curiously and similarly, if you had asked me for most of my life, what my favorite color was, I would have alternated between red and blue. One day, almost 15 years ago, I realized that that was not true. I was packing to move, and noticed that most of my clothes were some variation or combination of GREEN! It just goes to show, we are not always who we think we are until we have or take an opportunity to reflect. I try not to have more than two "long" telephone conversations a week. It takes about that long to recover.... I appreciate this content. 🕊❤🕯
For those who don't understand lol
It's statistically proven that people DO cause stress 😬
It's just better for highly sensitive ppl (introverts) to limit their interactions with others.
I used to wake up every day and think about what kind of crap am I going to have to deal with today; and still be processing what went on 2 hours after I get home. Since I have retired several individuals have attempted to fill the void; and I have had to block their phone number and email. 😃
I'm a 40 year old woman and I understand completely. I've been introverted all of my life. I love being by myself. I can't do the phone calls everyday or often. I was in relationships and they couldn't understand how I didn't want to spend time alot of time together or talk everyday. I would see my ex boyfriend of 5 years every two weeks on Sundays. it became once a month when he started to become needy and would pop up at my house on surprise visits. I excused it only once. Then I had to let him go. I don't do surprise visits or people trying to impose in my life without my permission, I don't do lack of respect and understanding. I thrive when being alone. it is essential for my well being. I can't function and get wary in groups of people or people who always are constantly talking or trying to interact with me when i want to be left alone. when I am outside I try to avoid people that I know or that look like they want to have a conversation. I probably won't be involved in another relationship unless it's long distance penpal friendship. . Definitely not marriage, because we would both live in separate houses a good distance away from one another. missing human interaction is a rare fleeting feeling. miss it, but then I think not really, I'd rather be alone enjoying myself by myself. People look at me like I'm weird or make comments about not having a husband or children..but I don't care. most people who ask wish they were without those things. If I live to be in my 60s, I swear I will probably never be seen unless emergency or appointments that require my presence. I will be the lady in the house all of the time people forget about, or they send cops over often for wellness checks. ty for discussing this and being open and candid.
Same. No to the surprise visits!! I’m just trying to chill, Dude- without YOU!! 🤣
Anybody who knows me well knows that they better be texting me if I have any thoughts of coming over because I do not like it when anybody drops by. Unfortunately I have quite a lot of family members that will give me just a little bit of warning before they come over from far away. And I’m not psychologically ready for them yet I need fair warning to make sure that I can handle having other people around. I too really enjoy being alone.
I love being an introvert. I live alone and see friends and family when I wish to. My only issue is, I still work part-time and not sure when I will be able to quit. Too much interaction at work. I love the people there, but look forward to the day when my schedule is totally free to decide what I will do with each day.
The world would be a great place if introverts were appreciated exactly as much as those who always have to be on the front line.
I'm not interested in being a leader or manager, but why they earn better money if we, introverts, actually solve most of their issues on a daily basis?
None of their motivational speeches ever convince me because it's me who decide about my own motivation anyway. I feel like this is all aimed at other extroverts who need it :)
I’m autistic and an extreme introvert with severe depression and anxiety and eating disorders I’ve always been alone I’ve lived alone since I was 10 basically
Ok I don’t wanna just repeat what everyone else said but OMG I needed this video right now!!! I’m 40, single, never married, no kids and enjoy being alone. I have a UA-cam channel where I travel and live in an RV to save money and not have to work a full time job….BUT I find it sort of hard. I have done well enough for myself that could travel anywhere but I find myself going back to the same local spots and not going new places and I ask myself daily why I don’t take advantage of my situation and just experience new things and new places? I enjoy being alone so much and could care less to talk to strangers. I do miss having a girlfriend but I don’t miss it too. I feel like you might relate? Maybe when I do find that special someone maybe they need to be a bit introverted as well?? Anyways, thank you so much for making me feel less alone and now I want to start watching more of your videos. Thank you for what you do!! 🤙
I'm an introvert, shy, and have social anxiety. Being alone is the only time I get relief.
Same
I like the fact that you're confident in your introversion. It's been such an insecurity of mine that I've put myself in very uncomfortable situations just to not be perceived as introvert, which equates to being weird in our society. It becomes even worse when you're a black man because they expect you to be gregarious and man of the party. I've observed this often..a queit white guy is not taken personal at the work place doe example but a quiet black guy is seen as hostile.
I always thought I was an introvert until I realized that I more so prefer deep, genuine non superficial connections. I enjoy people for a few hours but more than that I'm good. I don't like feeling lonely but I enjoy my alone time. I an an empath but I've mastered not soaking up others bad energy. I just don't like fake people. That is just annoying.
I see a lot of myself in you. I feel your pain. People tire me out, especially when they are stupid, which is most of the time.
Love this. It's like listening to myself speak. I'm a 49 year old woman, no children, never been married and it's been the best thing for me. I feel/am completely free with my time and resources. I don't like being around people much because I hate small talk and the experience is beyond draining. I've gone so deep into being an introvert that I know it's heavily impacted my social skills, but I don't have to actually be around anyone for any reason so does it really matter? (Rhetorical) Maybe it does matter because I feel like I'm two steps away from that point/mumble/look away stage that you hilariously described when you're too introverted then find yourself in a social setting. LOL But yes, I absolutely love being alone, it's so fulfilling to me. And this video had me laughing the whole way thru because I could relate to every single thing you said.
I've never heard about being an introvert spoken from this perspective before, like it's normal and natural. This video is truly giving me life again. Thank you for this video and for your channel. I'm definitely 'liking' and 'subscribing'.