It’s a shock to your system when you have that realization that you’ve been a victim of a narcissist. It’s heartbreaking because you gave it everything you had to make it work out. You then realize it didn’t matter to them because they didn’t care. They didn’t care about you they were just pretending and would turn on you in a heartbeat. Narcissists don’t have empathy like you, they are false selves. Their egos guide them. ❤️🙏✨
On Sunday a woman came back to the group. She left the narc last Christmas but she accepted a HOOVER on Valentine's Day and went back to the narc. She was DISCARDED last month on her birthdate! I think she is ready to move on to the closure and healing phase. It breaks my heart to see the devastation. A huge lesson on blocking and disconnecting for good! Namaste ♥
@@Karen-hh9rd She is picking up the pieces. And going to therapy and faithfully attending our meetings. I will tell her you asked. It will make her happy to know you care. Thank you and blessings to you!❤
So very true. Their silent treatment is so annoying. And it angers me to see how he is so different when in public. Everybody adores him and don't even know what a monster he is behind closed doors with me. Omg
Soooo true! Anything you need brother he tells people. They buy his fake persona. I tried to out him to a mutual friend. Backfired! Don't EVER do that! Peace.
I ignored so many red flags because I wasn’t used to dating or being in a relationship. I thought because someone liked me, that was enough and it was my job to be helpful and loving to someone who had a horrible childhood compared to mine. I remember needing help at the post office and she screamed at me and embarrassed me in front of strangers then stormed out of the building like a toddler. She also slapped me in the face in front of my friends at a BBQ because I took a picture of her having a good time and laughing. She cried and apologized to me and said something about her ex boyfriend taking a picture of her and it upsets her when she’s photographed. She would always complain she didn’t fit in with my friends and she doesn’t know how to talk around strangers. I saw her enjoying herself and wanted to document it because I wanted her to see that everything was ok. So many more situations like this for 8 years. I’ll never get that time back. Now I’m an expert and dodging bullets (Narcs) thank you for your channel, you saved me from the pain and confusion. ❤
It is so hard to wrap your head around the relationship. You stay hoping you'll get back to the beginning stage. Next thing you know years have passed. They're good at giving breadcrumbs and future faking when you're slipping away. Glad you you finally got away. I regret the time lost too but we can only move forward. ❤❤
I am 2 weeks out from seeing the narc. Not the first time I took a break. For some reason I kept letting him back in. Usually when I felt better. They never did anything to improve my life. Yet I still love them. My life is mostly over now. I lost my home, my friends, my car, my bank, my credit, my interest in life. I am crying all of the time. I have no hopes or plans. I see no future for myself. I wish I could be dead. To sleep & never wake up. I’ve lost contact w/anything that ever brought me joy. I want my life to be done. I can’t handle this pain any longer.
Hi Andrew. I'm up very early today, and I ALWAYS go back to see if I missed any videos. I can thank my lucky stars that we never married. FUTURE FAKED sounds good now but before I was a wreck. I doubt it if we made it one full year. This phone is a mess. Constantly correcting errors. He KNEW I was an Empath, and he tried to ruin me in so many ways. STAY STRONG. KEEP YOUR FAITH. NEWBIES: Don't let ANYONE take away your kindness and your beautiful heart. Stay alert. Keep coming back to this room. I came here OVER 2 YEARS AGO, and I'm still here. Andrew is the BEST! GREAT VIDEO, ANDREW❤❤
She would tell me that during her silent treatment of me, which lasted for weeks at a time, I wasn't supposed to interact with my kids "like nothing is wrong". She would pull them from me and force them to interact with her exclusively. Talk about energy shift. I was discarded and had my own journey of the dark night because my family was the most important thing to me, and I saw it fractured. It still hurts, but these videos give me a shot of energy each day to carry on.
Rumination is a sign of trauma bond. I believe a person will ruminate until they are tired of it. It WILL get old after a while. The reruns will get to the point where you know them by heart and when you start to ruminate you'll find yourself saying "I already know that story and how it ended" and suddenly you will find something else to be more interesting. Yes, feel great when you wake up and eventually you will feel great everyday. It takes a few years.
Make no mistake about it. I think about him every day. It is hard for me to believe it all happened. It has been ...oh shat, he died October 1, 2021. Today is October 1. This is when I got the call from the police department that he had been found dead in his apartment. You never get over it completely. I think about the whole situation every day but it does get easier to move toward something else. Notice I didn't say forget about him. It's different. Moving toward something to run from something else isn't the same as moving toward something because it is something you want and desire. Hang on...we can always talk if yo like.@@JH-td4mn
Great video Andrew. Yes it was a constant battle with the narcissist. He always had to be first everyone and everything else second. I could never have a normal conversation with him or have a quiet day with him. He kept me off balance and sad it seemed like i couldn't do anything right. Finally after being discarded i ran away and never looked back. Thank you Andrew and thank you everyone for your kind words.
When I tried to explain what I went through, I was surprised to find that some of my family had also gained an understanding of narcisssism recently through other situations. It appears that the awareness is spreading! Hallelujah! I haven't told my parents yet how my ex-gf ruined last Christmas. It's too painful to bring up in polite conversation. When it did happen, I was still in shock when my parents came to visit soon after. Now that the relationship is over (thank God), it's good to know they have enough awareness that I will feel more comfortable opening up about it when the time is right. 👍
You have to fight many battles. But you will reclaim your power and you will find your own voice. It's about learning to live your life on your terms and not letting the past define your future. Thank you Andrew for this great video! 😊🌿🙏💚🦋
We don't know what to do to get thru the Pain so we turn to destructive behaviors like drug abuse to alleviate the Pain.....but When We Sober Up the Problem is still There...THE NARCISSIST......
Oh this is just constant. It's soo predictable.. and yet they actually accuse you of creating the problem when like clockwork, they'll come up with some kind of mayhem. 🙄🙄🙄
It's amazing what time away from them will reveal to you. 3 years later and I'm still discovering some covert things he did to ruin some special occasions for me simply out of jealousy. The times I thought he had my back when in reality he was stabbing me in the back. I now see how he never loved or even liked me. 😢
The greatest journey worth taking in truth is the one traveled from within There is never a battle without a fight remember thank God for your victory in advance Never give another your power😇 Never trust a liar By Hanna 💛💜
Terrific Video! Every refreshed memory of a major inflicted or attempt to inflict a wound from a Narc has worked for me in "closing that chapter." Slow, steady steps forward with patience, Newbies! You'll find in the long run, they underestimated you and once you clear that rubble and debris post Narc encounter, you'll find strength you never knew you had.👍💪
So many events over 24 yrs. Now looking back it is very apparent to me others felt uncomfortable in his company. Important to know those that loved & knew me, were very aware I was not “ myself” around him. My positive bright light. As I take this time to heal, I am looking back to many times. I could not see it at the time. Disrespect, discarded, isolated, dismissed, that was it. I discarded the narc/addict the day I decided NO MORE, from victim to victory. He never saw it coming. I went from Hoover by him to rage. Individuate from the child, I was the mommy. Oh Lord such freedom for me. Journal, therapy( secret 3 mo prior discard). While he lined up new supply, I looked for good mental health. I graciously wish him the best, and hopefully successful recovery, once again.
Andrew has hit it on the nail of what is truly going on with these types of people. Rewatch timestamp 5:33 to 7:53. This is it in a nutshell. They were bullies when they were kids. They would just physically beat you up, back then or tease and name-call. Now, as adults they know that that is against the law and social etiquette but they still need to bully you in order fo do, and get away with, what they want to do, to win. To maintain superiority and you, remain inferior for their control over you and for you not to leave them and if you leave them, punishment. Their ego-brain works this way automatically.
Yes punishment is their no 1 way get their way and to destroy!!! Till you ore they are death! And they punish the children too… this is a crime and has to be punished!!!!!!
@tathe3786, Unfortunately our government and society cannot fight this disorder. Every time government makes a law, they find a way around it or it is neglected. The only way to, “ cure society “ of this problem is for people to build their own cities where no one owns their home so that a narcissist/ psychopath can be exiled out. Also our government should create a city for violent offenders to live and work, after their prison sentence is up because we, the people, should be able to say, no, to letting them be released back onto us!
I for one love how you communicate Andrew! You unpack alot! I love that!! ❤️ So much good information!!! Sometimes i replay your videos so i can really get the message!! They way you speak.. is how i think.. Thank you!!! Silent Battles indeed!!!
i used to say that I had to live emotionally ' shut down' in order to live with him because he would hurt and wound me so much. You could never trust them with your heart or your emotional well being. So you had to live an inauthentic life to survive the abuse. Not the way to live. Just stepping out after 23 years on the third version of me. At last! Healing has taken me over 2 years and still working on it now. Every day and night
Narcissists in family, at work and the one and the only man I loved madly who I thought the love of my life,was the worse narcissist of all this bunch ....I reached the hell without any exageration, still some narcissists at work targeting me because I am single in my 40s'....but I just ignore and daily hear your blessings,thank you for the hope you brought to my life.
I woke up in the middle of the night last night. A bunch of narc driven experiences rose to the surface. It's amazing how many layers there are to what they do. Got some major healing though.
I know what you mean. So many sleepless nights. In the beginning I woke up crying. I gave so much, there was nothing for me. He never really gave back. Hang in there. It does get better. 💖
I know exactly how you feel. During my relationship, I remember waking up in the middle of the night at times and feeling so much despair at things that just cut me down to my soul. It took me a year to understand the multiple layers to her mentality, motivations, modus operandi, etc. Once I figured it all out, it wasn't a pretty picture. Then I stumbled onto these narcissistic abuse recovery videos on YT and the lightbulb moments just lit up like a Christmas tree in my head. Just knowing there are so many other sane and empathetic people out there that have dealt with this insanity is a big step in the healing process. One day at a time. God bless.
Thank you, Andrew. Yes this resonates. You eventually stop desiring communicating at all because it goes nowhere. Everything you described is accurate!
WAR ZONE = Narcissistic relationship. Almost from the beginning I felt like I was fighting for survival. To understand, to take a breath, to relax, to survive. Newbies, keep learning and understand that nothing good will ever come out of a relationship with a narcissistic person. Let others know what you are experiencing. Do not keep silent. The longer you stay in the relationship the HIGHER YOUR TOLERANCE FOR ABUSE will be and decades later you will wonder where did time went. Blessings to all. Namaste 💗
One of the most shocking things for me to realize post discard was that the narcissist gets pleasure out of doing things to cause you or others pain & hardship. There is such a huge betrayal of trust that the narcissist inflicts upon you. God bless
Love the part when you mentioned that "they paid for pizza ten years ago". That summarizes what a narcissist is. He/she helped you 20 years ago with something petty and paid for pizza, therefore, you owe them for life.
@@Solitarian-FalconIts just the way they are wired…….their type is very very real on this earth……Don’t try to understand them…..just keep well away from them…..it’s the only way…..Andrew will equip you with plenty of education about narcissism so that you will heal and also you will learn to recognise them in the future.
@NARCDAILYYouAreNotAlone my wife is the flying monkey of my father-in-law. They have discard me and hooverd me for 15 years, and I'm looking for a way out and I'm finding it very soon.
Destroying the special event does not always occur before the event. My ex used to spoil almost every dinner out by saying we should not have dessert that we should get ice cream on the way home, that the dessert at the restaurant is a rip-off. This way, he would spoil the experience for me.
@@bigtreecombatacademy2927 Congratulations on minimizing my suffering! You remind me of my covert narcissist mother who always had to invalidate and one-up me with statements like this with: “You’ve got nothing to complain about X happened to me!” I thought this was a supportive community?
Many silent battles while in it. But it’s so good to simply give silence forward to any toxic folks. I don’t want to share my energy with any of them 😉 ❤🙏
Every holiday and vacation always in turmoil. Birthdays consisted of the local restaurant where you got a free birthday meal. 😪 Sure I said not to waste money on frivolous things like flowers or cards. Sure I meant it. All I ever wanted was the love and respect to make my day special. Did I ever receive that? Absolutely not! Time makes you kinda numb, but underneath the surface, it still was very hurtful. My new life will be entirely different after the narcissist...this I know for sure. I am the alchemist. ✨️🦋✨️
I have 4 daughters with my ex narc. Then I learned the hard way that my familys structure is made from the same material. They must enjoy my suffering because they never actually lift me up, they just keep me close enough to have access and tear me down once I gain a little strength. Every day is filled with endless silent battles. They all want my kids and that alone is beyond draining.
@@vishwini I read your comment when you left it and let it marinate for awhile, it's too much to wrap my brain around all at once, but wanted to say thank you
7:02 That viper baited me into arguments, insulting my child when IT could no longer get a reaction from me. That spider was incessant.. unrelenting. It would not stop until IT got what IT wanted. When I couldn't bear it any longer, I raised my voice. IT called me "monster" (projection.). This happened for years, but I was beginning to figure IT out, before I knew what narcissist meant. One day, I finally responded to IT, "If I'm such a monster, why are you still with me?? Why are you here?" IT had no response. IT never used that word "monster" again, rather IT changed ITS tactic. Several months later I asked IT to leave. And off IT went to a new source of fuel.
He is doing God’s work, I been trying to detach from my Ex lover for three years and she just continued to play mind games ,refusing to be honest and do the right thing instead she just hurt me with no regret are remorse. Luckily I started, started educating myself and this channel has been one of my greatest tool to overcome so much heartache ,pain ,and disrespect by someone I once thought had my best interest in heart… Boy was I wrong about that…. Peace, and LOVE ❤️!!! My brother continue doing God’s work , we need you and your knowledge ✊🏾✊🏾✊🏾
The energy vampire tried to destroy every piece of my beauty!! All the way down to my eyelashes falling out. I now know who he is and who I needed to become! Eyelashes are back and actually more full and my life is greater than I could ever imagine!! If you are new many of us were in your shoes and it does get way better!! Never give up before the miracle!
This is a great video. The key part is their obsession with putting out your light and muck throwing in the hope you become the 'low--life' that they are. Yes you do the work and they jump in and 'steal your good'.🤭🤭
I've completely dissociated from my narcissistic family members and it's been soooooo chill and easy going. I went back to pack some stuff and I felt the crushing feeling of oppression and realized just how good it is to be away from them
thanks so much, you have helped me so much to understand what happenedd to me and my life. I have learned again and again that i am worth loving, i am ok, i am blablabla.... I am free now and healing , slowly . again THANKS ANDREW love your work and your help.
After being here for awhile I still struggle with things. For those new I hope you stay with this path. It is not easy for any of us but it gets slowly better day by day. I thought it was never going to feel good again, that I would be lost in this mess forever. Now I am encouraging others to stick with it. I hope this will be of some good for you to hear? I am only giving back what was so freely given to me. Hang in there!
I remember well my ex playing head games when we were seated on the plane that was scheduled to leave in 10 minutes. I told him that if he did not stop it, I was getting off the plane. I said it just loud enough so that people sitting close by turned their heads. He was trying to get the vacation off to a bad start.
Andrew thank you so much for the dedication and consistency. I can never pass up a video of yours. They serve as the reminders where I sometimes get lazy and amnesia. I love when you articulate certain important points followed by a stern warning of "GET THE MESSAGE" Its all very helpful.
Thank you for these suggestions, and tools, the daily views have given us all, the ability to deal with learning how to leave the table after the respect has left the table. The nastiest sickness of this world. The toxic chemical relationships that start one way until they show who they really are. Disgusting individuals. So many profiles include these disrespectful individuals. Sad illness. Thank you for being here!
I have broken free from a covert narcissist, after a 22 year marriage, physically and geographically. But (especially to anyone new on the channel) I'm sorry to say that breaking free mentally doesn't follow automatically The ways the narcissist trained you to think and behave stick around like a bad smell, and you will find resistance in your own mind when you try to improve your life. You have had maybe years of reinforcement telling you that is "bad" behaviour. Don't panic and stay strong, be gentle with yourself like you would be with anyone else who had suffered that abuse. You will heal in the end, in your own time, and it will be worth all the effort. 🌈🙏
I believe the past is running along right now-if it resurfaces -best defense -Good Food-Beautiful environment-rest awake -it’s as good as sleep-your body is protecting you -I have accepted nightmares -better asleep than living with them🌴
PREACH! My ex ruined my 2 year old sons bday party by throwing a rage fit and having a psychotic meltdown in front of 100 people all because my mom asked him not to roll up weed at a toddlers party with kids and old people around.
I adore your channel. You've helped me and.... I'm sure countless others navigate Hurricane Narcissist. You're insight is spot-on. Thanks so much. Keep up the great work(s.)
Brilliant video ... very detailed also...07:25 just had someone do this, they love bomb and a friend said to me, 'How wonderfully, brilliant' they are.. This resonated with me, I had to 'explain' because I know this friend fairly well....so I did..... But how they make themselves out to be sacred, when all in their mind is destruction.. its always difficult when it happens, even though you know it will happen! You come out feeling the bad person, for saying bad words, but I could not say, 'well yes how wonderful they are'! The truth, to a friend, must come out.. then you must deal with yourself also😢....with an unknown person, I would say nothing..
Good video Andrew. i have to say, sometimes you kind of scare me because it seems like you are talking from my head or my heart. and everything you say - true. keep those videos coming, they are very helpful.
Andrew, you are superb, so fluid and perceptive on this sad subject we are all involved with. I found out what I’m dealing with three years ago after many years of wondering what the heck was going on. Your videos have really helped… very many thanks from me… keep it going and best wishes to you and all trying to deal with this horrible situation.
I didn't understand how he always forgot my birthday until I discovered narcissism. When I realized he would never change was when he begged me for financial help, and I helped him...then 2 days later I never got even a text from him for my birthday. We'd already talked about what we would do. But I got radio silence from him. Months later when it was his birthday I gave him the same, nothing! Oh, did I hear about it. He was upset so I reminded him that on all of his birthdays he'd discarded me and went out and had a good time. Why waste my effort? They can dish it but can't take it!
Excellent video. Yes, those light bulb moments.. joining more of the dots, realising there was more manipulation or whatever going on, than l realised. I make notes of these/timeline them. Am glad you pack so much into these videos.
I remember well an adult conversation I tried to have with my ex about finances. Unfortunately he knew it was coming up and spent a lot of time preparing so his he could to throw me off. He controlled every interaction in the conversation. It ended up being one of his cruelest gaslighting episodes ever.
@@emilywilson7308 Horribly entitled! Mine was different. Even though I was the primary income earner, his contribution to the finances was criticizing every dollar I spent on anything. Meanwhile, he relied on my income to borrow money at a reasonable rate. So unfair.
Thank you Andrew for validating my experience. My ex attempted to isolate me from my closest friends as they saw the red flags that I didn’t. They would tell me his silent treatment was childish. His family became my family as I distanced myself from my own. I’ve been free a year now from him and his family, and my family and friends have supported me on my healing journey. It has taken over a year of hard work for me to heal, but I am at peace now. 🙏
🎉 No i dont think about the narc . My family still ask me questions sometimes about him . They are so happy im not with him to be torchered the way i was . They throw in a few new things about him as time goes on 💡my family actually had to do some healings from the narc as well 🎉❤🎉
Those silent battles always hit me as odd & were clues to SOMETHING IS NOT RIGHT! My instincts were on code red, but at the time I couldn't put my finger on what it was that I was dealing with. Since getting the education & awareness... It's so perfectly clear! The pain to let go is worth it all 🎀😘
5:05ish. Recently had a family reunion I attended. Left my phone at home ( rushed because of last minute change of plans NOT from narc but loving family members, who offered me a ride to reunion). Felt nice to be disconnected for a few hours. Did NOT think of narc AT ALL! 😮 😊 Came home and was able to have peace. 😊
Looking back on that time when we were having screaming matches; if I took a step back; we fought like children & he knew which buttons to push to get me riled up and exactally how to hurt me. I'm overjoyed to be free now!
Constant interruptions whether I was speaking to them, another, or just trying to think…read all my journals and expected me to explain… interrupted sleeping patterns by waking up me at 3 am with supposed nightmares and would grab my leg really hard and then blame it on a bad dream… then want to have a discussion’ about something I supposedly did wrong months before and refuse to go back to sleep and talk about it in the daytime…back me into a corner interrogating me and when trying to push through because they obstructed my path to get away, they say something like “ ouch you pushed me, you are abusing me” etc.. I feel that being able to share this is a sign of healing… I have a sharp memory and like to share experiences to help others… I am so glad and grateful that’s over with ❤
The King of look-at-me mountain rode his high horse off into la-la land. The emperor wears no clothes for sure, but I can see his naked and pathetic self behind the mask. I am a narcissistic injury waiting to happen, but have chosen stoic silence. No need to win any more battles with such an unworthy, weak opponent.
SILENT battle.. that says it all.. that’s why the outside world doesn’t see the truth.. it’s a SILENT battle.. Lol i had to laugh when you said they paid for pizza 15 yrs ago and still hold it against you.. that’s the narc way! Here the narc complains if I ask for help with groceries.. says he pays the internet each month.. because everything is a competition.. because that’s the same as the same amount at the supermarkets every couple of days.. compared to a once a month internet bill.. “rolling my eyes”.. I was told this is a form of financial abuse .. but it’s definitely a silent form.. Thank you for an informative video today.. and still like the free flowing hair.. sweet dreams Andrew and community. ❤🌙
The love that I was feeling for him is starting to fade. I look forward to the day that I just don't care about him at all, either way. He's been a stranger to me for years, and my affection is precious. I choose to share my love where it will be appreciated and reciprocated.
When he had control over me and I never defied his authority he was happy and I was so busy raising my kids and running my business didn’t pay attention to his doings ! I never knew the word narcissistic only selfish his way or the freeway!! One lovely day I woke up from the coma and I started to take control of my money and I said no he changed and so did I !! Absolutely there were many sleepless nights and I went for therapy and boy awakenings big time!! I am recovered and focus on my life and I am more aware of people with narcissistic behavior so many out there and I stay away from them!! You live and learn the hard way!
Yes I’m free 11 months physically & no contact a few months. I’m so appreciative of this channel & others who educated me on the games of these narcissists & of the nature of them. They proved to be dishonest, deceitful, self serving takers, users & psychological abusers. I’m so grateful to GOD I am OUT!
Not being validated or just flat out ignored in private is what makes this NPD relationship abusive. They are an entity that is so self absorbed because of their own bi-polar or major depression (not your fault and not your problem to change). As Andrew teaches here, journaling is a powerful tool to help you validate yourself and in those writings you will see your bright light and personality emerge again after being drowned out for so long by the NPD or self absorbed toxic individual you were involved with. Stay on this channel as well as others to help you. I am on this channel just about every day and would not have come out of the fog without it after four months of no contact. Remember, stay out and stay well. You come first. You will heal.
The disruption before going to an event to include graduation parties or attending holiday gatherings is real! Especially when they feel like they’re “forced” to go and be with you it makes for a very interesting car ride to the actual event, if you even make it to the event. Then, once you get to said event you’re forced to wipe away the tears and pretend like everything is okay. They’re fine with you out in public in front of your shared friends. All the while though you can tell they’re somewhat miserable, as if they don’t really want to be ringing in the New Year with you.. if anyone is picking up what I’m putting down. It’s a shared embarrassment only you two know about. However, you’re sure other people could pick up on the tension at the dinner table too. Smirking has been mentioned before, it’s been questioned if the individual genuinely had a nice time with you or not in pictures taken. Sometimes it’s a yeah, but more times than not now you can tell they were forcing themselves to be there with you. They actually didn’t care to share in what were supposed to be fun times together. There are many different events that could be listed here, it’s a very difficult pill to swallow while reflecting. Yes, they would throw a monkey wrench because they didn’t want to do whatever it was you wanted to do, it was always, ALWAYS, about them. As for the “leap frogging” from relationship to relationship this does occur. It’s a void they’re trying to fill, but it can’t be filled by someone else, it can only be filled by them. They don’t know this and they will never figure it out so the problem will continue to perpetuate. Thank you for making another important video!
Yes there where so many silent battles ,and than the trauma bond of a total stranger who refused to leave my home and than they come back to try to start it all over again!! I am very sick and drained emotionally and who cares .nobody . I just educate myself and pray that I can enjoy whatever time I have left ,hopefully get better and move on from the mass destruction 2 people that just don’t care did to me without batting and eye. What a disgrace for a person to do to a person who only gave unconditional love to her only child and let her boyfriend rip my heart and soul to shreds🙏😔
It’s a shock to your system when you have that realization that you’ve been a victim of a narcissist. It’s heartbreaking because you gave it everything you had to make it work out. You then realize it didn’t matter to them because they didn’t care. They didn’t care about you they were just pretending and would turn on you in a heartbeat. Narcissists don’t have empathy like you, they are false selves. Their egos guide them. ❤️🙏✨
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On Sunday a woman came back to the group. She left the narc last Christmas but she accepted a HOOVER on Valentine's Day and went back to the narc. She was DISCARDED last month on her birthdate! I think she is ready to move on to the closure and healing phase. It breaks my heart to see the devastation. A huge lesson on blocking and disconnecting for good! Namaste ♥
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How is your friend today! 😢🙏 ❤ Found healing I hope!
@@Karen-hh9rd She is picking up the pieces. And going to therapy and faithfully attending our meetings. I will tell her you asked. It will make her happy to know you care. Thank you and blessings to you!❤
Realizing what they are helps a lot.
Learning you can never fix it.
They will never change.
It's not your fault.
The damage is done, healing begins.
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Well said Donna!!! 👍
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Totally agree.
Very well said
Short & to the point
Great comment
So very true. Their silent treatment is so annoying.
And it angers me to see how he is so different when in public.
Everybody adores him and don't even know what a monster he is behind closed doors with me.
Omg
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They sure know how to put on their public mask alright!
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Soooo true! Anything you need brother he tells people. They buy his fake persona. I tried to out him to a mutual friend. Backfired! Don't EVER do that! Peace.
I ignored so many red flags because I wasn’t used to dating or being in a relationship. I thought because someone liked me, that was enough and it was my job to be helpful and loving to someone who had a horrible childhood compared to mine. I remember needing help at the post office and she screamed at me and embarrassed me in front of strangers then stormed out of the building like a toddler. She also slapped me in the face in front of my friends at a BBQ because I took a picture of her having a good time and laughing. She cried and apologized to me and said something about her ex boyfriend taking a picture of her and it upsets her when she’s photographed. She would always complain she didn’t fit in with my friends and she doesn’t know how to talk around strangers. I saw her enjoying herself and wanted to document it because I wanted her to see that everything was ok. So many more situations like this for 8 years. I’ll never get that time back. Now I’m an expert and dodging bullets (Narcs) thank you for your channel, you saved me from the pain and confusion. ❤
Welcome 🙌🙏😌
The old “you triggered me” line
Always throwing tantrums
It is so hard to wrap your head around the relationship. You stay hoping you'll get back to the beginning stage. Next thing you know years have passed. They're good at giving breadcrumbs and future faking when you're slipping away. Glad you you finally got away. I regret the time lost too but we can only move forward. ❤❤
So sorry you went through that. Glad you got rid of that devil. Lol
If the relationship is exhausting= strong indicator you are in one or around one. Healthy relationships create energy not deplete it.
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That's an important point!
Yes 🙌
I am 2 weeks out from seeing the narc. Not the first time I took a break. For some reason I kept letting him back in. Usually when I felt better.
They never did anything to improve my life. Yet I still love them.
My life is mostly over now. I lost my home, my friends, my car, my bank, my credit, my interest in life.
I am crying all of the time. I have no hopes or plans. I see no future for myself.
I wish I could be dead. To sleep & never wake up.
I’ve lost contact w/anything that ever brought me joy.
I want my life to be done.
I can’t handle this pain any longer.
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Self-love protects and heals one from narcissistic abuse.
It is like the Narc never lets their shield down...the JUDGING is endless and persistent.....like a Mosquito hovering for Blood....
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Hi Andrew. I'm up very early today, and I ALWAYS go back to see if I missed any videos. I can thank my lucky stars that we never married. FUTURE FAKED sounds good now but before I was a wreck. I doubt it if we made it one full year. This phone is a mess. Constantly correcting errors. He KNEW I was an Empath, and he tried to ruin me in so many ways. STAY STRONG. KEEP YOUR FAITH.
NEWBIES: Don't let ANYONE take away your kindness and your beautiful heart. Stay alert.
Keep coming back to this room. I came here OVER 2 YEARS AGO, and I'm still here. Andrew is the BEST!
GREAT VIDEO, ANDREW❤❤
Thank you 😌🙏🙌❤️
I love when you said I wish you the best but stay away from me one of the realest things I have ever heard
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She would tell me that during her silent treatment of me, which lasted for weeks at a time, I wasn't supposed to interact with my kids "like nothing is wrong". She would pull them from me and force them to interact with her exclusively. Talk about energy shift. I was discarded and had my own journey of the dark night because my family was the most important thing to me, and I saw it fractured. It still hurts, but these videos give me a shot of energy each day to carry on.
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The most selfish people on the planet.
Hang in there. I know it is hard. 💖
WEEKS? ....She must be the TERMINATOR of NARCS the N1000...LOL...my wife longest silent treatment was 3 days....
Ironically I would be better off when She is Silent Because I am not being Criticized
Thanks Andrew.
Rumination is a sign of trauma bond. I believe a person will ruminate until they are tired of it. It WILL get old after a while. The reruns will get to the point where you know them by heart and when you start to ruminate you'll find yourself saying "I already know that story and how it ended" and suddenly you will find something else to be more interesting. Yes, feel great when you wake up and eventually you will feel great everyday. It takes a few years.
Thanks for sharing. Am looking forward to getting to the point where the Narcissist is completely insignificant to me.
Make no mistake about it. I think about him every day. It is hard for me to believe it all happened. It has been ...oh shat, he died October 1, 2021. Today is October 1. This is when I got the call from the police department that he had been found dead in his apartment. You never get over it completely. I think about the whole situation every day but it does get easier to move toward something else. Notice I didn't say forget about him. It's different. Moving toward something to run from something else isn't the same as moving toward something because it is something you want and desire. Hang on...we can always talk if yo like.@@JH-td4mn
Great video Andrew. Yes it was a constant battle with the narcissist. He always had to be first everyone and everything else second. I could never have a normal conversation with him or have a quiet day with him. He kept me off balance and sad it seemed like i couldn't do anything right. Finally after being discarded i ran away and never looked back. Thank you Andrew and thank you everyone for your kind words.
Welcome 💯💯😌
His discard WAS YOUR BLESSING!
Take good care 👍
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Thank God that jerk is out of your life now!💪🏻🌈🔆
When I tried to explain what I went through, I was surprised to find that some of my family had also gained an understanding of narcisssism recently through other situations. It appears that the awareness is spreading! Hallelujah!
I haven't told my parents yet how my ex-gf ruined last Christmas. It's too painful to bring up in polite conversation. When it did happen, I was still in shock when my parents came to visit soon after. Now that the relationship is over (thank God), it's good to know they have enough awareness that I will feel more comfortable opening up about it when the time is right. 👍
That's great! Will make things much easier for your future.
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You have to fight many battles.
But you will reclaim your power and you will find your own voice.
It's about learning to live your life on your terms and not letting the past define your future.
Thank you Andrew for this great video! 😊🌿🙏💚🦋
Welcome 💯🙌🙌
@lios583 Well said 💕
Thank you Andrew💕
It’s misery onMISERY 😢on MISERY
So true. They get a sick satisfaction by causing discomfort they are sadistic. Still fighting my silent battles
We don't know what to do to get thru the Pain so we turn to destructive behaviors like drug abuse to alleviate the Pain.....but When We Sober Up the Problem is still There...THE NARCISSIST......
Oh this is just constant. It's soo predictable.. and yet they actually accuse you of creating the problem when like clockwork, they'll come up with some kind of mayhem. 🙄🙄🙄
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It's amazing what time away from them will reveal to you. 3 years later and I'm still discovering some covert things he did to ruin some special occasions for me simply out of jealousy. The times I thought he had my back when in reality he was stabbing me in the back. I now see how he never loved or even liked me. 😢
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The greatest journey worth taking in truth is the one traveled from within
There is never a battle without a fight remember thank God for your victory in advance
Never give another your power😇
Never trust a liar
By Hanna 💛💜
Excellent comment 💎
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Terrific Video! Every refreshed memory of a major inflicted or attempt to inflict a wound from a Narc has worked for me in "closing that chapter." Slow, steady steps forward with patience, Newbies! You'll find in the long run, they underestimated you and once you clear that rubble and debris post Narc encounter, you'll find strength you never knew you had.👍💪
Thank you for sharing 💯🙌😌🙏
Im free! Im finally free. Thank the Lord free at last!
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WooHoo!!!
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So many events over 24 yrs. Now looking back it is very apparent to me others felt uncomfortable in his company. Important to know those that loved & knew me, were very aware I was not “ myself” around him. My positive bright light. As I take this time to heal, I am looking back to many times. I could not see it at the time. Disrespect, discarded, isolated, dismissed, that was it. I discarded the narc/addict the day I decided NO MORE, from victim to victory.
He never saw it coming. I went from Hoover by him to rage. Individuate from the child, I was the mommy. Oh Lord such freedom for me.
Journal, therapy( secret 3 mo prior discard). While he lined up new supply, I looked for good mental health. I graciously wish him the best, and hopefully
successful recovery, once again.
Thank you for sharing 😌🙌💯🙏
Andrew has hit it on the nail of what is truly going on with these types of people. Rewatch timestamp 5:33 to 7:53. This is it in a nutshell.
They were bullies when they were kids. They would just physically beat you up, back then or tease and name-call. Now, as adults they know that that is against the law and social etiquette but they still need to bully you in order fo do, and get away with, what they want to do, to win. To maintain superiority and you, remain inferior for their control over you and for you not to leave them and if you leave them, punishment.
Their ego-brain works this way automatically.
Thank you for sharing 😌💯🙌
Yes punishment is their no 1 way get their way and to destroy!!! Till you ore they are death! And they punish the children too… this is a crime and has to be punished!!!!!!
@tathe3786,
Unfortunately our government and society cannot fight this disorder. Every time government makes a law, they find a way around it or it is neglected. The only way to, “ cure society “ of this problem is for people to build their own cities where no one owns their home so that a narcissist/ psychopath can be exiled out.
Also our government should create a city for violent offenders to live and work, after their prison sentence is up because we, the people, should be able to say, no, to letting them be released back onto us!
I for one love how you communicate Andrew!
You unpack alot! I love that!! ❤️
So much good information!!!
Sometimes i replay your videos so i can really get the message!!
They way you speak.. is how i think..
Thank you!!!
Silent Battles indeed!!!
Thank you 😌🙌🙏💯
i used to say that I had to live emotionally
' shut down' in order to live with him because he would hurt and wound me so much. You could never trust them with your heart or your emotional well being. So you had to live an inauthentic life to survive the abuse. Not the way to live. Just stepping out after 23 years on the third version of me. At last! Healing has taken me over 2 years and still working on it now. Every day and night
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Narcissists in family, at work and the one and the only man I loved madly who I thought the love of my life,was the worse narcissist of all this bunch ....I reached the hell without any exageration, still some narcissists at work targeting me because I am single in my 40s'....but I just ignore and daily hear your blessings,thank you for the hope you brought to my life.
I woke up in the middle of the night last night. A bunch of narc driven experiences rose to the surface. It's amazing how many layers there are to what they do. Got some major healing though.
I know what you mean.
So many sleepless nights. In the beginning I woke up crying.
I gave so much, there was nothing for me.
He never really gave back.
Hang in there. It does get better. 💖
I know exactly how you feel. During my relationship, I remember waking up in the middle of the night at times and feeling so much despair at things that just cut me down to my soul. It took me a year to understand the multiple layers to her mentality, motivations, modus operandi, etc. Once I figured it all out, it wasn't a pretty picture. Then I stumbled onto these narcissistic abuse recovery videos on YT and the lightbulb moments just lit up like a Christmas tree in my head.
Just knowing there are so many other sane and empathetic people out there that have dealt with this insanity is a big step in the healing process. One day at a time. God bless.
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Thank you, Andrew. Yes this resonates. You eventually stop desiring communicating at all because it goes nowhere. Everything you described is accurate!
WAR ZONE = Narcissistic relationship. Almost from the beginning I felt like I was fighting for survival. To understand, to take a breath, to relax, to survive. Newbies, keep learning and understand that nothing good will ever come out of a relationship with a narcissistic person. Let others know what you are experiencing. Do not keep silent. The longer you stay in the relationship the HIGHER YOUR TOLERANCE FOR ABUSE will be and decades later you will wonder where did time went. Blessings to all. Namaste 💗
Namaste 😌🙌🙏
Wow Never be silent!!!!
"The higher your tolerance will be" . A epic statement of utmost importance. These shituations are no place for a highly empathic person to be.
Good advice. ❤
It is like the Narc never lets their shield down...the JUDGING is endless and persistent.....like a Mosquito hovering for Blood......
We are all in this battle. They have been in covert world since the start
#Andrew ThankYou for this glimmer of hope that you hold UP Much Love
15:00
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One of the most shocking things for me to realize post discard was that the narcissist gets pleasure out of doing things to cause you or others pain & hardship. There is such a huge betrayal of trust that the narcissist inflicts upon you. God bless
It is the deliberate pain that is the worse kind.
Plain cruel. That evil grin while doing it.
You’re right, the pain they cause others is done on purpose. At their core they’re bullies, plain and simple.
Love the part when you mentioned that "they paid for pizza ten years ago". That summarizes what a narcissist is. He/she helped you 20 years ago with something petty and paid for pizza, therefore, you owe them for life.
These people do not understand empathy or giving with no agenda. Andrew is spilling the beans, Take Notes! & Move on and find like minds! BE WELL.❤
The Devil stairs at the Narcissist and say " And they call me devil"
That says it all ........ I shouldn’t have laughed......but I did!!!!!!
@@margaretrussell7202 but why they appear like this,, why
@@Solitarian-FalconIts just the way they are wired…….their type is very very real on this earth……Don’t try to understand them…..just keep well away from them…..it’s the only way…..Andrew will equip you with plenty of education about narcissism so that you will heal and also you will learn to recognise them in the future.
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This touches every cord of my situation. Thank you.❤
Welcome..😌🙏💯
@NARCDAILYYouAreNotAlone my wife is the flying monkey of my father-in-law. They have discard me and hooverd me for 15 years, and I'm looking for a way out and I'm finding it very soon.
I think many of us were down for the count...we just made it up before the 10 count. I was at a 9.9 I believe
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You said it!!! 👍
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Destroying the special event does not always occur before the event. My ex used to spoil almost every dinner out by saying we should not have dessert that we should get ice cream on the way home, that the dessert at the restaurant is a rip-off. This way, he would spoil the experience for me.
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To be honest that’s pretty mild for a narcissist
Mine did way way worse over dinner
@@bigtreecombatacademy2927 Congratulations on minimizing my suffering! You remind me of my covert narcissist mother who always had to invalidate and one-up me with statements like this with: “You’ve got nothing to complain about X happened to me!” I thought this was a supportive community?
That would be disappointing for me too. Whenever I go to a fancy restaurant I get cream brulee! It's a rare event!
It's the little things that get you.
Many silent battles while in it. But it’s so good to simply give silence forward to any toxic folks. I don’t want to share my energy with any of them 😉 ❤🙏
Amen! My energy is a lot less than it used to be so I have to conserve it!😊
@@emilywilson7308 ❤️🤗
Amen!!! Conserve your energy! If you let the narc consume it, your health will begin to suffer… TRUST ME!!! ❤❤❤❤
@@jennifernewton4637 😉❤️🙌
“So often times it happens that we live our lives in chains and we never even know we have the key.” The Eagles
A beautifull man you are , God bless you .
Every holiday and vacation always in turmoil. Birthdays consisted of the local restaurant where you got a free birthday meal. 😪 Sure I said not to waste money on frivolous things like flowers or cards. Sure I meant it. All I ever wanted was the love and respect to make my day special. Did I ever receive that? Absolutely not! Time makes you kinda numb, but underneath the surface, it still was very hurtful. My new life will be entirely different after the narcissist...this I know for sure. I am the alchemist. ✨️🦋✨️
Thank you for sharing 💯🙌😌
Cheers & Blessings to a beautiful you. May you be given double for your trouble!!!
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I have 4 daughters with my ex narc. Then I learned the hard way that my familys structure is made from the same material. They must enjoy my suffering because they never actually lift me up, they just keep me close enough to have access and tear me down once I gain a little strength. Every day is filled with endless silent battles. They all want my kids and that alone is beyond draining.
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Children always get hurt . Heck adults don't even understand.
They don't want kids. They want to take it away what is precious to you.
@@vishwini I read your comment when you left it and let it marinate for awhile, it's too much to wrap my brain around all at once, but wanted to say thank you
7:02 That viper baited me into arguments, insulting my child when IT could no longer get a reaction from me. That spider was incessant.. unrelenting. It would not stop until IT got what IT wanted. When I couldn't bear it any longer, I raised my voice. IT called me "monster" (projection.). This happened for years, but I was beginning to figure IT out, before I knew what narcissist meant.
One day, I finally responded to IT, "If I'm such a monster, why are you still with me?? Why are you here?" IT had no response. IT never used that word "monster" again, rather IT changed ITS tactic. Several months later I asked IT to leave. And off IT went to a new source of fuel.
He is doing God’s work, I been trying to detach from my Ex lover for three years and she just continued to play mind games ,refusing to be honest and do the right thing instead she just hurt me with no regret are remorse. Luckily I started, started educating myself and this channel has been one of my greatest tool to overcome so much heartache ,pain ,and disrespect by someone I once thought had my best interest in heart… Boy was I wrong about that…. Peace, and LOVE ❤️!!! My brother continue doing God’s work , we need you and your knowledge ✊🏾✊🏾✊🏾
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Amen!!!
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The energy vampire tried to destroy every piece of my beauty!! All the way down to my eyelashes falling out. I now know who he is and who I needed to become! Eyelashes are back and actually more full and my life is greater than I could ever imagine!!
If you are new many of us were in your shoes and it does get way better!! Never give up before the miracle!
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Love you, Kim!❤
@@emilywilson7308 ❤️❤️❤️❤️you tooooo Emmmmillllyyy!! 🤗🤗🤗🤗🤗
This is a great video. The key part is their obsession with putting out your light and muck throwing in the hope you become the 'low--life' that they are. Yes you do the work and they jump in and 'steal your good'.🤭🤭
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I've completely dissociated from my narcissistic family members and it's been soooooo chill and easy going. I went back to pack some stuff and I felt the crushing feeling of oppression and realized just how good it is to be away from them
Amen and congratulations. No matter how peaceful life may be, there is instant drain when the narcissists are around, even without a word spoken.
@@millie.k even a text is like ugh
thanks so much, you have helped me so much to understand what happenedd to me and my life. I have learned again and again that i am worth loving, i am ok, i am blablabla.... I am free now and healing , slowly . again THANKS ANDREW love your work and your help.
His videos sure helped me understand. 💖
Welcome 😌💯🙌🙏
Agree 💯 on the low vibration!!!
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Always a great topic. It was a silent battle. My Narc even stalked me on LinkedIn
...that is just pathetic
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After being here for awhile I still struggle with things. For those new I hope you stay with this path. It is not easy for any of us but it gets slowly better day by day. I thought it was never going to feel good again, that I would be lost in this mess forever. Now I am encouraging others to stick with it. I hope this will be of some good for you to hear? I am only giving back what was so freely given to me. Hang in there!
Blessings back at ya! 👍
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Thanks, Richard!❤
You are so very welcome, Emily.@@emilywilson7308
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Time,heals if we allow it too.
I remember well my ex playing head games when we were seated on the plane that was scheduled to leave in 10 minutes. I told him that if he did not stop it, I was getting off the plane. I said it just loud enough so that people sitting close by turned their heads. He was trying to get the vacation off to a bad start.
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Good for you!
Hello Andrew. The hair is great. Your looking more relax now. Along with bringing us the truth .❤😊😊
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Narcs LUVVVVVVV the sound of their own voice. Someone whose voice could bend STEEL! 🤦♀️🤦♀️🙄
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Andrew thank you so much for the dedication and consistency. I can never pass up a video of yours. They serve as the reminders where I sometimes get lazy and amnesia. I love when you articulate certain important points followed by a stern warning of "GET THE MESSAGE" Its all very helpful.
Thank you for these suggestions, and tools, the daily views have given us all, the ability to deal with learning how to leave the table after the respect has left the table. The nastiest sickness of this world. The toxic chemical relationships that start one way until they show who they really are. Disgusting individuals. So many profiles include these disrespectful individuals. Sad illness. Thank you for being here!
Welcome 😌🙌🙏
I have broken free from a covert narcissist, after a 22 year marriage, physically and geographically. But (especially to anyone new on the channel) I'm sorry to say that breaking free mentally doesn't follow automatically The ways the narcissist trained you to think and behave stick around like a bad smell, and you will find resistance in your own mind when you try to improve your life. You have had maybe years of reinforcement telling you that is "bad" behaviour. Don't panic and stay strong, be gentle with yourself like you would be with anyone else who had suffered that abuse. You will heal in the end, in your own time, and it will be worth all the effort. 🌈🙏
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I believe the past is running along right now-if it resurfaces -best defense -Good Food-Beautiful environment-rest awake -it’s as good as sleep-your body is protecting you -I have accepted nightmares -better asleep than living with them🌴
Great video Andrew!
Wishing everyone clarity and peace....
Thank you 😌💯🙌
PREACH! My ex ruined my 2 year old sons bday party by throwing a rage fit and having a psychotic meltdown in front of 100 people all because my mom asked him not to roll up weed at a toddlers party with kids and old people around.
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Wow, that is so crazy!
I adore your channel. You've helped me and.... I'm sure countless others navigate Hurricane Narcissist.
You're insight is spot-on.
Thanks so much. Keep up the great work(s.)
Brilliant video ... very detailed also...07:25 just had someone do this, they love bomb and a friend said to me, 'How wonderfully, brilliant' they are.. This resonated with me, I had to 'explain' because I know this friend fairly well....so I did..... But how they make themselves out to be sacred, when all in their mind is destruction.. its always difficult when it happens, even though you know it will happen! You come out feeling the bad person, for saying bad words, but I could not say, 'well yes how wonderful they are'! The truth, to a friend, must come out.. then you must deal with yourself also😢....with an unknown person, I would say nothing..
Every function- narc would argue and have me in tears
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I used to wonder what people thought of me and as I let go and being who I wanted to be it would every aspect of my life.
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Thank you again NARCDAILY 🙏
Welcome 🙏🙌😌
Good video Andrew. i have to say, sometimes you kind of scare me because it seems like you are talking from my head or my heart. and everything you say - true. keep those videos coming, they are very helpful.
Thank you 💯💯🙌😉
Andrew, you are superb, so fluid and perceptive on this sad subject we are all involved with. I found out what I’m dealing with three years ago after many years of wondering what the heck was going on. Your videos have really helped… very many thanks from me… keep it going and best wishes to you and all trying to deal with this horrible situation.
Thank you 😌🙌🙏
Spot on Andrew!!
I didn't understand how he always forgot my birthday until I discovered narcissism. When I realized he would never change was when he begged me for financial help, and I helped him...then 2 days later I never got even a text from him for my birthday. We'd already talked about what we would do. But I got radio silence from him. Months later when it was his birthday I gave him the same, nothing! Oh, did I hear about it. He was upset so I reminded him that on all of his birthdays he'd discarded me and went out and had a good time. Why waste my effort? They can dish it but can't take it!
Thank you for sharing 💯💯😉😉
Excellent video. Yes, those light bulb moments.. joining more of the dots, realising there was more manipulation or whatever going on, than l realised. I make notes of these/timeline them. Am glad you pack so much into these videos.
Thank you 💡💡🙌🙏😌
I remember well an adult conversation I tried to have with my ex about finances. Unfortunately he knew it was coming up and spent a lot of time preparing so his he could to throw me off. He controlled every interaction in the conversation. It ended up being one of his cruelest gaslighting episodes ever.
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After we paid off a huge credit card debt and chopped them up, he got a new card and maxed it out without telling me! Very destructive!
@@emilywilson7308 Horribly entitled! Mine was different. Even though I was the primary income earner, his contribution to the finances was criticizing every dollar I spent on anything. Meanwhile, he relied on my income to borrow money at a reasonable rate. So unfair.
Thank you Andrew for validating my experience. My ex attempted to isolate me from my closest friends as they saw the red flags that I didn’t. They would tell me his silent treatment was childish. His family became my family as I distanced myself from my own. I’ve been free a year now from him and his family, and my family and friends have supported me on my healing journey. It has taken over a year of hard work for me to heal, but I am at peace now. 🙏
🎉 No i dont think about the narc . My family still ask me questions sometimes about him . They are so happy im not with him to be torchered the way i was . They throw in a few new things about him as time goes on 💡my family actually had to do some healings from the narc as well 🎉❤🎉
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Those silent battles always hit me as odd & were clues to SOMETHING IS NOT RIGHT! My instincts were on code red, but at the time I couldn't put my finger on what it was that I was dealing with. Since getting the education & awareness... It's so perfectly clear! The pain to let go is worth it all 🎀😘
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Clarity !!
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You didn't know at First because you are an Empath and it is hard to grasp that Someone could be full of hate and judgement....God Bless Sabian
I love how the "think about that" gets more and more 'think about thatty' with each video.
the man! thanks for helping us stay on the path i appraciate u
Welcome 😌🙌🙏
Amen
5:05ish. Recently had a family reunion I attended. Left my phone at home ( rushed because of last minute change of plans NOT from narc but loving family members, who offered me a ride to reunion).
Felt nice to be disconnected for a few hours.
Did NOT think of narc AT ALL! 😮 😊
Came home and was able to have peace. 😊
Looking back on that time when we were having screaming matches; if I took a step back; we fought like children & he knew which buttons to push to get me riled up and exactally how to hurt me. I'm overjoyed to be free now!
I wish the narcisists the best but stay away from me! Thank you Andrew for great observations and advice. God bless you❤
Constant interruptions whether I was speaking to them, another, or just trying to think…read all my journals and expected me to explain… interrupted sleeping patterns by waking up me at 3 am with supposed nightmares and would grab my leg really hard and then blame it on a bad dream… then want to have a discussion’ about something I supposedly did wrong months before and refuse to go back to sleep and talk about it in the daytime…back me into a corner interrogating me and when trying to push through because they obstructed my path to get away, they say something like “ ouch you pushed me, you are abusing me” etc.. I feel that being able to share this is a sign of healing… I have a sharp memory and like to share experiences to help others…
I am so glad and grateful that’s over with ❤
Ugh!😢
The King of look-at-me mountain rode his high horse off into la-la land. The emperor wears no clothes for sure, but I can see his naked and pathetic self behind the mask. I am a narcissistic injury waiting to happen, but have chosen stoic silence. No need to win any more battles with such an unworthy, weak opponent.
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Excellent... stay well!!! 👍
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SILENT battle.. that says it all.. that’s why the outside world doesn’t see the truth.. it’s a SILENT battle..
Lol i had to laugh when you said they paid for pizza 15 yrs ago and still hold it against you.. that’s the narc way! Here the narc complains if I ask for help with groceries.. says he pays the internet each month.. because everything is a competition.. because that’s the same as the same amount at the supermarkets every couple of days.. compared to a once a month internet bill.. “rolling my eyes”.. I was told this is a form of financial abuse .. but it’s definitely a silent form..
Thank you for an informative video today.. and still like the free flowing hair.. sweet dreams Andrew and community. ❤🌙
Going NO CONTACT is a must in order to survive and strive!
Thank you so much Andrew for these videos. You have helped me immensely.
Welcome 😌🙌🙏
The love that I was feeling for him is starting to fade. I look forward to the day that I just don't care about him at all, either way. He's been a stranger to me for years, and my affection is precious. I choose to share my love where it will be appreciated and reciprocated.
When he had control over me and I never defied his authority he was happy and I was so busy raising my kids and running my business didn’t pay attention to his doings ! I never knew the word narcissistic only selfish his way or the freeway!! One lovely day I woke up from the coma and I started to take control of my money and I said no he changed and so did I !! Absolutely there were many sleepless nights and I went for therapy and boy awakenings big time!! I am recovered and focus on my life and I am more aware of people with narcissistic behavior so many out there and I stay away from them!! You live and learn the hard way!
Stay on your healing path. Don't give up. Know you are worth the time and effort to heal. Life is good.
Sir ... I love you !! Your such a light in this narcissistic world! Thank you
Welcome 😌🙌🙏
Yes I’m free 11 months physically & no contact a few months. I’m so appreciative of this channel & others who educated me on the games of these narcissists & of the nature of them. They proved to be dishonest, deceitful, self serving takers, users & psychological abusers. I’m so grateful to GOD I am OUT!
Not being validated or just flat out ignored in private is what makes this NPD relationship abusive. They are an entity that is so self absorbed because of their own bi-polar or major depression (not your fault and not your problem to change). As Andrew teaches here, journaling is a powerful tool to help you validate yourself and in those writings you will see your bright light and personality emerge again after being drowned out for so long by the NPD or self absorbed toxic individual you were involved with. Stay on this channel as well as others to help you. I am on this channel just about every day and would not have come out of the fog without it after four months of no contact. Remember, stay out and stay well. You come first. You will heal.
Thank you for sharing this insight 😌🙏📚📝
Takes ages to get over. Still in recovery now after 18 months
The disruption before going to an event to include graduation parties or attending holiday gatherings is real! Especially when they feel like they’re “forced” to go and be with you it makes for a very interesting car ride to the actual event, if you even make it to the event. Then, once you get to said event you’re forced to wipe away the tears and pretend like everything is okay. They’re fine with you out in public in front of your shared friends. All the while though you can tell they’re somewhat miserable, as if they don’t really want to be ringing in the New Year with you.. if anyone is picking up what I’m putting down. It’s a shared embarrassment only you two know about. However, you’re sure other people could pick up on the tension at the dinner table too. Smirking has been mentioned before, it’s been questioned if the individual genuinely had a nice time with you or not in pictures taken. Sometimes it’s a yeah, but more times than not now you can tell they were forcing themselves to be there with you. They actually didn’t care to share in what were supposed to be fun times together. There are many different events that could be listed here, it’s a very difficult pill to swallow while reflecting. Yes, they would throw a monkey wrench because they didn’t want to do whatever it was you wanted to do, it was always, ALWAYS, about them. As for the “leap frogging” from relationship to relationship this does occur. It’s a void they’re trying to fill, but it can’t be filled by someone else, it can only be filled by them. They don’t know this and they will never figure it out so the problem will continue to perpetuate.
Thank you for making another important video!
Yes there where so many silent battles ,and than the trauma bond of a total stranger who refused to leave my home and than they come back to try to start it all over again!! I am very sick and drained emotionally and who cares .nobody . I just educate myself and pray that I can enjoy whatever time I have left ,hopefully get better and move on from the mass destruction 2 people that just don’t care did to me without batting and eye. What a disgrace for a person to do to a person who only gave unconditional love to her only child and let her boyfriend rip my heart and soul to shreds🙏😔
Keep listening newbies 😊❤. It gets greater later🎉🎉🎉
Wonderful video!!! I have to listen to it a few more times. ....
Thank you 🙌🙌🙏
The “wet hair” look! LOVE it!!! 🥰🥰🥰 Sorry ☺️🤭 HADDA be said. 😉 Okay deeper wisdom to come soon 😁
Get a little chill seeing that...
Thank you Andrew! I think accumulating is a form or hoarding.
💯💯😉