Everything Wrong With The House Of The Dead
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- Опубліковано 24 вер 2024
- How has it taken us this long to sin a Uwe Boll movie? I have no idea. But we're rectifying that today, with these sins we found in the truly awful House of the Dead.
Next week: More sins!
Remember, no movie is without sin. Which movie's sins do YOU want to see recounted?
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"Yes more bodies to maintain my immortality so I can spend my time trapped in isolation hanging out with my rotting corpse friends". What the hell is the point of immortality if you are just going to do what you would if you were buried in a graveyard anyways. I mean at least Dracula managed to travel around Europe and get laid every once in awhile.
Good fucking point.
Maybe the guy has internet connection and porn does it for him? o_o...I mean i would have said the zombies but the idea of them doing it disturbs me deeply
NekoSoren Nope, it's still 2003 in this movie.
Then I guess it's zombies then :l
Then shudent the world be ending because 2003 is when the world collapse outbreak started in the game
"You created it all so you could become immortal. Why?"
"To live forever!"
Actual lines, actually written, for an actual film. It doesn't get better then this.
That is some resident evil level dialogue.
@@NiteKat2023 Wesker.. until RE5
Wow this is probably the DUMBEST line in all of film and movie history.....🙏🙏🙏
well, its not wrong, lmao
I feel my brain cells dying from just reading that.
"It doesn't magically reload when you holster the thing" - But it does in the game!
It couldn't have been much worse.
dude it got 4% on rotten tomatoes... thats the lowest score i have EVER scene...
+Jonathan S Gerad House of the Dead is NOT Uwe Boll's lowest rated movie... Alone in the Dark got 1%.
WTF... how is a movie supposed to be that bad and have a budget... i mean seriously i know highsschoolers that could make a better house of the dead movie than Boll
Jonathan S Gerard They got a new director for the sequel, and it's actually pretty good. I mean, it's not GREAT, but the sequel is actually ENJOYABLE.
Scooby-doo on Zombie Island is a better zombie/suspense movie than this.
That movie legitimately scared me as a kid. This movie would have bored 9 year old me back in 2003.
That was the shit as a kid
It's better than a number of renowned zombie movies and :spoiler: the antagonists aren't even zombies they're witch furries
The zombies are hardly even zombies they were more like ghosts, misunderstood Restless Souls.
This is actually a true statement.
@@TheLowBrassDude I really heard about King of the Zombies in 1941. The black & white horror comedy film looks good and it's one of my favorite Mantan Moreland movie of the 1940s, eh?
You missed one of the funiest things that is wrong with this movie, Karim Debbache a french youtuber pointed it in his review of this films.
There are moments when zombies are jumping in the forest where you can actually see trampolines they are jumping on, and you can see travelling rails too in a scene.
Damn
We thought we're the only ones who could see that and we're surprise that we found one comment that talk about the trampolines most of the comment don't talk about it or never notice it.
Link please.
I want a movie like this, but with someone like Jeremy telling everyone how stupid they are while everyone ignores him
I agree!
Then he comes in at the end after splitting from the group with military backup and owns everybody there, including the main cast.
that would be great
Fucking make it happen. Oh and the black guy isn't the first guy to die, there isn't a dumb blonde whose sole purpose is to fornicate with that dumb jock, and the smart person doesn't say let's split up. Well, the latter can go away as it would defeat the purpose of the ending.
Kenyon Erickson and he is the only one who lives
'Guns do not reload when you holster them'
Um...they actually DO in the games.
It might be the same usual incompetence...or a surprisingly clever reference.
Probably incompetence.
Then the movie needs to make up its mind, is it going by rules of the game or not. Because, if it is, then there are a lot more things they did wrong.
I'm pretty sure the games don't matter
assimilation9 Not to Uwe Boll.
Call me crazy but I'd LOVE to see a decent House of the Dead movie! The cabinet might seem to be plotless (and the voice acting is awful) but there is a plot and an atmosphere I'd love to see adapted faithfully.
bloodrunsclear I would love to see a decent House of the dead too. I was just making a reference to cinemasins "books don't matter" policy.
assimilation9 Its not so much that "Books Don't Matter" - It is well known that movies are 'Adaptations' of books - Not everything in a book will translate well to the screen so they are edited for that reason... I guess you could say "Games don't matter" too - But in this case, as was the case with Resident Evil, The Story was more or less already written... Why was there any need to alter anything at all?
I haven't watched this movie (thankfully) but if it was a Spanish guy who wrote the log, wouldn't the log have been in Spanish, not English?
If not, it's a sin. And if so, it's a sin that one of the characters just happens to speak Spanish when it's needed. Spanish-ex-machina.
Matt D Also, that book in 11:58 is blank.
Maybe it's an age-thing, but I am Swedish and I write a lot of diary-like stuff and logs and instructions in English, almost as often as I do in Swedish, so... it's not that weird xD
Maybe they need the glasses from "National Treasure" to see the writing? lol
hylianchriss
That's because Sweden has largely adopted an international culture and is very anglicised.
When that log was written, Spanish was probably more of a lingua franca than English was on a global level.
Ship's logs for military vessels were also written in the language of the flag they sailed under.
And even so, populations with rare languages are more likely to learn more languages. You only have to go to Germany or France or Russia to find a large part of the population who know only one language (and it's not English), because they get along with one language. If you speak Finnish or Icelandic you have to learn other languages to interact with anyone outside your immediate circle.
In conclusion: it would be pretty damn weird.
@@Infinite_Jester Yes and based on the uniforms that the Spaniards had in that scene, it was way before English spread at the levels of today.
"It's fucking genius..."
"What?!?"
haha holy shit that's the best possible reaction that you could've given to that. oh, my day just got a whole lot better
Wait... last time I played House of the Dead, guns do reload when you holster them, or point them offscreen which is good enough.
If that is what they where going for then that is slightly smart but mostly stupid.
"Reload! Reload! Shoot outside of the screen!"
This makes Dragonball Evolution look like Citizen Kane.
That movie is almost bad as GT. Grrruuhhh...... *pukes a little*
+Starlight Dash GT?
Dragonball GT?
Exactly
+Emperor Palpatine "it makes cop dog look like cop out, I don't even know what that means!"
I would add another sin because I swear those pages in that book looked blank.
Also the Asian lady in the American flag spandex fought zombies in high heels. Wut.
@@tasiyeahh Too many zombie-fighting females wear high heels in games, it looks so uncomfortable.
The confidence really helps
One has to wonder, in awe, at how the fuck this movie was green lighted.
Jay Reagan Just Google Uwe Boll and read about who finances his movies. It's sad that the Germans won't come to their senses and stop giving him money.
***** Yeah, I looked it up, and it's a no-brainer. No studio in their right minds would ever give this talentless ass any money.
Jay Reagan
I can't believe the tax breaks in Germany. If I ever want to make a shitty movie, I'm just gonna find some rich guy in Berlin and ask him for money.
Rejoice! News hath spread that our talentless little ass, Uwe Boll, has quit the movie business!
Codereaper30
MUST GOOGLE THEN CELEBRATE!!!!!!!
Neat tidbit: The weapons training Uwe Boll put the actors through consisted solely of locking them in a room with an arcade cabinet of House of the Dead 1 and 2 for several hours a day with a bucket of quarters. No safety training or anything like that because hey, who needs to be concerned with potentially maiming your fellow cast members by firing too close with blanks. Also if I remember right he didn't even have a trained fire arms handler on sight.
Actually on the DVD he had just the female actresses go to a paintball range and shoot at people dressed as zombies. They even say "we need to make sure we shoot for the head otherwise the fan boys will be like hey that's not how you kill a zombie"
For the sequel they even went so far as to do no training at all. Which, to me, seems better since ignoring the training just makes it worse
@@OMEGATHENIETZCHIAN They made a sequel?
@@thelonerider5644 Yep. It had Victoria Pratt (former fitness model/minor canadian tv star) and featured the answer to a long unanswered zombie question...if you get bitten by a mosquito that bit a zombie do you turn? The answer is yes, but slowly...the rest of the movie isn't worth seeing.
@@OMEGATHENIETZCHIAN I'll pass, thank you... if I wanted to see someone slowly devolve into a mindless creature I'd watch cable news lol.
@@OMEGATHENIETZCHIAN naw part 2 is good and worth seeing.
It should get +5 sins just for having Uwe Boll in the credits.
solitarylonewolf I take that back, it should get +100 sins.
Have you heard his kickstarter rant?
MLG MIN3CRAFT L3ts pl4ysXXX the man is an idiot. he deserves a swift kick in the balls. twice.
Jindorek yeah if you can get to them
+solitarylonewolf Uwe Boll should be a reason to not even give this steaming pile of manure the light of day
You forgot to credit a sin for the asian girl running around screaming for the first half of the movie but as soon as she got a gun she developed mad martial arts skills and kicked zombie butts
11:33 my God the way that dude delivered that line just made me think of Johnny " I did not kill her, I did not"
"Oh. Hi, Mark"
YOU ARE TEARING ME APART, LISA
YOU ARE TEARING ME APART, GUITARMAN0365!
b
I think the real question is what ISN'T a sin in this movie, because I can't think of one!
Boobs?
Big Bowss Boobs
Boobs!
Boooobs !
Boobs AND a lap dance.
A HoTD movie needs to be about 2 dudes going into a spooky mansion and shooting the shit out of everything, including the Magician at the end.
SorakuFett I like the second game, except for the voice acting
SorakuFett Exactly and make sure to go into a small room with a
headless knight with a giant wielding axe
and then in the sequel would be 2 guys going into the city searching for a guy while also shooting the shit out of everythhing
plus with a better voice acting
Homophobic Asswipe and in the 3rd installment one of the guys goes missing while investigating the whereabouts of the mansion owner from the first game's son, so his daughter teams up with the other guy to find him and they proceed to shoot everything, find the guy that went missing and discover that the mansion owner from the first game transformed himself into an immortal being and so the aforementioned daughter and mansion owner's son team up to kill him
Humaniod25
amen my nigga
I saw this movie when i was 10 years old. It was fucking bad even for a 10 year old
Same
Same It's true is not even horror so why it is it horror
+Coventry Work because zombies.
+Jan Moors same with me only i was a teenager and it was my least favorite movie EVER!
+Jan Moors I played the game when I was like 9....... On the Wii.
If you ever do watch this again or for the first time I highly recommend watching it with the directors commentary! It made the whole thing worth it for reals!!
There is also a "Funny Version" edit of House of the Dead, that starts with Uwe Boll being forced to watch it. He pleads for forgiveness and sins it himself.
I feel like a 13 year old made this movie...
Nope just a middle aged guy with the maturity of a 13 year old.
+Tad Flipper McCaffrey only 13 year old wil watch this?
+Kusmijnklote Metdiezever i'm 13 and i didn't watch this...
+Kusmijnklote Metdiezever cinemacins watched this to make this video.
Only House Of The Dead.
"To Protect The LOYFE CYCLE!"
"MAH GAWD"
"Don't Come!"
"Wut Da?"
I bought this movie a long time ago on DVD without knowing anything about it other than it was supposed to be "based" off of a video game I liked to play. I also didn't know who Uwe Boll was at the time. Never again, Cinema Sins. Never again.
*House of the Dead* was the very first zombie game I ever played, I can remember spending SO much money on it in the mall-arcade as a kid.
Having thoroughly acknowledged how much its cheap voice acting, obsolete scare tactics, and nonsensical story have aged over the years, I can still honestly say that the plot of the game was better than this excuse for a movie.
I don't care if this was meant to be a sort of prequel with the survivor being revealed as "Curien" at the end, that it referenced the games at all is an insult. This is one of those rare times when the *"Everyone is entitled to their opinion"* argument offers no defense to a product. This film creatively & technically was objectively BAD, not even enjoyable as a guilty pleasure, PERIOD. It was pathetic as an adaptation and pitiable in acting, directing, stunts, effects, editing, etc).
Anyone who has seen a decent film even once in life would agree. Hollywood seriously needs to get it through their heads already that some franchises simply DO NOT WORK in film. How this ever got a sequel is astounding.
Keith Harris "This is one of those rare times when the"...
...
...
...
...
...
...
...
...
So?
+Keith Harris WAIT THIS GOT A SEQUAL!??!?!?!?!?!??!?!?!?!?!?!
+Keith Harris WAIT THIS GOT A SEQUAL!??!?!?!?!?!??!?!?!?!?!?!
watch officer Unfortunately, yes, and a third film has been talked about for some time.
by the same producer
After watching this movie I now value my life at 400 dollars.
I value my life at 400 dollars because I saw this movie IN THEATERS lol.. laughed the entire time with friends
surprised you skipped over the greatest line in movie history "You created it all so you could become immortal. Why?" "to live forever"
"Who's gonna be able to look me in the eyes with a face like this..." *turns to show sticker on face.*
I will pay good money to never have to see another one of those fucking Tina Fey American Express commercials again.
I will pay good money to never see tina fey again
I will pay good money to never hear from Uwe Boll again.
+Ronald Pagan
YES.
I'd like to see the Nostalgia Critic, Spoony & Linkara try to review this movie.
^ All of this right here.
You know why making a movie based on House of the Dead was a bad idea before anyone even started making it? Because, to quote one Ben "Yahtzee" Croshaw, "House of the Dead as a series has long been the butt of jokes for its atrocious stories, disastrous translation, and calamitous voice acting..." With that in mind, why would you make a film about a game with problems like those?
TO PROTECT THE LOYFE CYCLE!
Cinko420 LOLZ
because they were fucking amazing
Evan Bernard Yes, as games, they're the shit, but not as stories.
Jaceblue04 ok. 4 and overkill had ok plots. 1-3 bad plots. great games.
The amount of sins this movie got make me love it even more. This is a "So bad is good" movie.
It's Uwe Boll, the best way to sum up everything wrong with his movies is to use one simple word: EVERYTHING! There, done.
What, no sin for the "You created it all so you could be immortal! Why?" "To live forever!" scene?
why the fuck would sega sponsor a shit rave in the middle of nowhere?
+Richard Spillers they made Sonic '06 and Shadow the Hedgehog, Sega doesn't always make the best choices
+Mst3kfanatic1 Everyone does the 'dark half' in games. What makes Sega's version any worse than all the other uninspired 'nega' halves?
+Richard Spillers Why the fuck would Sega allow Uwe Boll to make a movie out of one of their game series?
They were drunk, it was dark, there was acid...shit happends XD
And in the afternoon?
I had a random thought, imagine if there was a movie directed by Uwe Boll starring Tommy Wiseau and produced by Michael Bay
All of that crappiness might make an Oscar worthy film...
Lol
FManAngryAmerican I think it would be so bad that if you watched it, it would be like looking into the Ark from Indiana Jones and you'd melt/explode
+xxxCrackerJack501xxx if this movie had anything to do with Michael Bay when the zombies got shot they would of exploded
Connor Kenway and it would be even more rapidly edited and have a bunch of those annoying spinning 360 slow motion shots
the movie's run time would of been 3 hours, but with out the slow motion shots it would only be 30 minutes.
Wow also when the girl jumped with a shotgun when she fired she would have gone backwards due to recoil. But this movie seems really really poorly made and all around terrible.
Shotgun does have pretty big recoil, but it won't make you fly backwards. I do agree about the movie being terrible.
Backon Lazer yeah not like a lot like ridiculous but she would still go backwards
James Sabins Yea, she probably would have lost her balance. There really was no reason to even jump. =/
Girl can fire a shotgun better then kevin hart.
Any thing Uwe Bowl makes is terrible.
***** LOL this movie was one the leads to Dragball Evolution. Comic book adaptions yes I love them. Video Game, Anime, etc Hell no.
***** Mortal Kombat 1 was the one of them and Blood the last Vampire.
Uwe Boll is not responsible for Mortal Kombat. That film is one of Paul WS Anderson's few decent movies (that's the guy responsible for the Resident Evil live action movies so you know he's just full of quality😑).
Omar Harris I never blamed Uwe for those films it's just those films deserve way more better and trusting management then how you see them. All those adaptions for Video games, anime, and etc get the shittiest directors and screen writers like people don't give a shit about the franchises.
Omar Harris All though these adaptions make a bad name for film. There were some that had my eye Blood the Last Vampire, Doom, MK1, and Need for Speed.
"How did this girl just so suddenly go Jackie Chan Mode?"
Me: IDK Movie Logic??
Forget Ed Wood, Uwe Boll is the worst director of all time.
If you watch the movie Ed Wood, you would understand that Wood had a great passion for what he was doing and didn't care what anybody else said about his movies. Uwe Boll however, knows that even if his movies are financial flops, he still finds a way of making a lot of money, and how does he respond to bad criticism? By challenging his critics to boxing matches knowing full well that they don't box and he is really good at it. What a prick.
Andrew Ryan Yeah, I thought about the boxing thing when I saw that CS did this, lol.
Random Fact of the Day!
In 2009, Uwe Boll was given an honorary Golden Raspberry Award for being "Germany's answer to Ed Wood."
At least most of Boll's films are not known by the general public, unlike Michael Bay.
Andrew Ryan "If you watch the movie Ed Wood, you would understand that Wood had a great passion for what he was doing and didn't care what anybody else said about his movies".
That's a fucking definition of a terrible movie director (and pretty much anyone else). Just because Wood didn't give a shit about nothing doesn't make his movies better, well... maybe he should have! Boll is terrible, yeah, but so is (was) Ed Wood. I know it's cool to like Ed Wood now, especially after Depp's portrayal, but he's the definition of a shitty director, probably inspiration to countless others donkeys like Boll himself. The man does not deserve credit for achievements in movie directing, no more than Boll.
7:28 nope that gun was out of bullets remember? it doesn't magically reload when you holster the thing.
well actually having unlimited ammo would be one of the only connections this movie has to the game.
I made the worst mistake by using my hard earned money to see this stinking pile of crap in the theatre. What a freaking waste. The only good thing I learned from this experience is whenever I see a movie that has Uwe Boll's name attached to it, I steer clear and run from it like it's a zombie apocalypse.
I also watched this movie in the theaters. 🤣
I remember half the people leaving the theaters during the movie! 🤣
I can't even understand how this movie didn't go straight to VHS! 😁
To be fair, I could totally see someone raised in today's culture standing around, filming a zombie attack.
GamerDame yeah that is true. that person filming a zombie attack would probably be twitting about "omg err one be dying and shit #sosad #tooyoungtodie #dontbiteme" LMAO!
By raised in today's society you mean have cameras in their pockets?
I mean when has camera footage ever been useful after a violent incident right?
Me too ! 😡
@@FrancisR420 They mean that today's society is desensitized to gore. So, yeah filming a zombie attack wouldn't be that off.
You know when a baby deer is trying to walk, and it takes its first steps, and then its hit by a Semi...yea, thats pretty much this movie.
I remember playing The House of The Dead with my dad when I was little. I was so terrified. At some point I defeated a boss, and it felt like the greatest moment of my life. That same night I had a dream about being friends with a zombie.
-House of the Dead....lets see what you got for this movie.
-True it's bad, at least the two Agents from the games series appears.
-I rather play the games than watch this movie.
I rather play any game then watch the movie based around it... even the actually good movies...
especially if the game involves the use of a shotgun that I aim myself...and for that reason miss a lot
*****
You might like the Resident Evil movies and not just the live action series, but the CG ones also (maybe more so the CG ones as they tell parts of the story that isn't in the game) because they don't tell the story in the game, and the parts that are from the game are matched up pretty well.
OmniscientWarrior I do like the cg RE movies...and the first live action one...
I never said i don't watch them, but for the most time...i play the game again before watching the movie
btw...Ever watched the animated tekken movie?
begginning and middle? meh...
ending? So fucking worth it
*****
Yes the animated Tekken was a good movie, and once again, the story makes so much more sense in Japanese (and tbh, if it weren't for that one scene with Anna, I wouldn't have finished watching it; and I was young when I saw it, no too young, but still). The live action Tekken should not have happened. And the animated Battle Arena Toshinden animated movie, but it didn't really follow to game story too well.
OmniscientWarrior The live-action Tekken movie wasn't even that bad to me. It wasn't really that great, but I actually watched it without thinking to myself. "Wow, this is dumb." There are a lot worse movies.
Anyone every notice that it's always Uwe Boll who comes along and ruins the video game movie and making us hate them so no one else makes them and leaving him the only one to keep ruining them? Then he gets tired of us complaining about how he ruined everything over and over, so his only way of handling the critisism is to challenge anyone to a fight instead of just trying to make the movies better? Even his new movie Rampage 2 promised taking the fight to Washington DC and fighting the government, but it was just take hostages in a basement that's not even in DC movie.
I have never paid to see a single one of his movie, and I regret seeing them after the fact, but why do we still watch them and how is he still getting money to ruin everything?
I hate almost all his films, but In all honesty, Rampage is not a bad film at all.
Timppa 3
Yeah, Rampage 1 came out of nowhere and I loved it. Rampage 2 was okay, but I was expecting more, hopefully a third installment will be bigger in scale.
Timppa 3 Uwe Boll's non video game aren't as bad. I didn't know Rampage was an Uwe movie until the end. I liked Tunnel Rats as well.
Video game movies were pretty poor before Uwe Boll got his hands on some of them. He made them worse, don't get me wrong, but the likes of the Super Mario Bros. movie and the Mortal Kombat sequels (the original was pretty good) were trash long before Boll came on the scene.
He actually makes his money through tax loopholes that guarantee that even if the film is a huge bomb, he still makes money or something to that extent.
The chick who kept yelling "Matt" reminded me of Emily from until dawn
"Like the walking dead?"
"Roll credits. Wait, you're not good enough for that."
The majority of this movie is people talking and making very VERY stupid decisions and contains a grand total of five minutes of action at the most, if we're lucky. This is a more faithful Walking Dead movie than most anything else.
Zombies dying from blows to the chest or back instead of the head. Why isn't this a sin????
maybe cause the zombies in the game dont have to be headshotted?
yoshikage kira oh yeah I wasn't even talking about a game I was talking about the movie. But the rules still apply.
because zombies are fictional, therefore whomever created the story can apply any rules they want to them
Amarna Mousa I am aware that they're fictional I'm just saying as the rules of zombies go the only way to kill them is destroying the head
Twilight one, Twilight two, Twilight three, Twilight Four, and Twilight Five. Next question...
1:43 biggest sin of all time. It's Captain Jack Sparrow
This video just sadly reminded me that there's no more arcade machines near me anymore with the original house of the dead. Damn...
My favourite quote from ANY film, EVER:
"You created it all so you could be immortal, why?"
"To live forever!"
Holy shit, I was just thinking that Cinimasins should do a Uwe Boll film. And lo and behold CinemaSins is doing a Uwe Boll film!!! Do them all, Jeremy!! DO THEM AAAAALLLLL!!!! (But be aware, Boll as been known to challenge his critics to a fight.)
Sir you just posted the best comment ever on this channel. Any movie with Uwe Boll's name in the credits should start out with an automatic +5,000 sins.
Do Rampage!! That one is supposedly very dear to Boll!
Juan-Carlos Ocasio
I always saw that on Netflix but never watched it...I'd take a guess and say it sucks, but it has a 6.4 rating on IMDB. Wait a minute...what am I saying??? Uwe Boll made it so it has to suck. There is no other option.
***** Rampage and it's sequel really aren't that bad compared to his other movies. The lead actor does a good job with what he's given to work with.
Heidi Maynard
Thanks! I may have to check it out if it's still on Netflix.
I'm never going to re-watch this movie, but I swear that every time a character died, there was a fast-forwarded montage of every scene that character was in thus far, with a filter over it. I thought for sure that'd be something called out.
Also, I think the '360' shots were Uwe Boll legitimately trying to do Bullet-Time, but figured if he didn't have hundreds of cameras in sync, that one spinning on a track was good enough.
Actually a fun watch if you see it with friends and drink everytime there's a continuity error.
The films so full of them you'll be blurry eyed in the first 10 minutes.
And by the end you'll have liver failure.
almost definitely
Drinking game take a shot every time they count a sin
I remember hearing about this movie when I was younger and being like "COOL!" but then I attempted to watch it, even as a kid in elementary school who had played the game, I was not impressed, I wanted to stop watching it and that's exactly what I did, I don't think i've ever watched it until the end..
Man everything is wrong with 99% of Uwe Boll flims
It's funny how the producer and director credits get sinned without any explaining.
Isn't he the guy that makes bad movies on purpose for the tax right offs?
yup its him
well... the original Rampage was kinda good
Kenneth The Wizard This comment deserves so much more likes, it's fucking hilarious.
13:05 What's worse is that that door opens by swinging OUTWARDS. So, yeah, barricading it with a shovel and some barrels has just turned the characters into a gang of Abbott and Costello knockoffs.Also, Alicia at some point during the big shootout switched from a shotgun, to a pistol, to a shotgun again.And one final sin: Rudy is supposed to be the doctor from the video game, yes, but in the game, his name is ROY. Not Rudolph.
Just gonna say here that I thank ya'll for doing these! I've been pseudo watching these horror flicks through you guys since it skips the useless and gross bits and adds extra comedy so I don't get so freaked out, but still get to satisfy my curiosity about what the stories are. Thank you!! ;w;
I hope Uwe Boll watched this
me too
+Starbite Productions If he did, he would probably threaten CinemaSin's to a boxing match. Like he did against all the critics that hates him as a director.
+WormsWeGot
Does he actually do that?
Yes, he did in the past. He got so pissed at some of his critics that he invited them to a boxing contest. He really doesn't take to well at getting bad reviews.
WormsWeGot
That gives me some relief.
I have problem letting go of grudges, but here is a guy who takes his grievances with others another step UP and boxes their EARS OFF!? What kind of person do you call that!??
Producer: Uwe Boll *ding* sin
Director: Uwe Boll *ding* sin
I'm done...
Is it weird I have had vivid dreams of this house, and never watched this movie or heard of it before?
no. it doesn't. your gun does not reload from holstering it... you gotta shoot off screen.
Simmer Boil Right. And you're also fune as long as you've got enough coins for credits.
Riasat Salmin Sami my tombstone will have a coin slot and CONTINUE? (9) carved for a name.
PLEASE REVIEW HOUSE OF WAX. that would be so funny. I found so many things wrong with that movie and am interested in what you find.
The overdubs at the end are absolutely brilliant. I don't know how large of a team you guys work in, but you have it making me laugh until my face hurts every time!
3:15 What the hell is a .50 cal doing on a coast guard boat?
Well... Murica, you know? The officers drive around with m4's too, i've seen.
It's a pretty regular thing, since the Coast Guard is military, and those boats are meant to stop criminals who may be armed with high caliber rifles.
That's a light armament for a boat that size. In Australia, our boats have a 50. cal and an artillery piece.
That's normal armament for a USCG boat of that size on the southern coast of the US(assumed location due to tropical environment). It's for dealing with the multitude of possibly dangerous drug-runners and people-smugglers in the area. They're essentially America's police and fire department all in one and at sea.
***** Quick, flip the boat!
with that big zombie fight. I think the zombies found the acid
that whole action scene of them killing countless zombies was ridiculous and had me LMFAO X'D
Wait house of the dead had a movie? Since when! O.o
He mentioned many times that it was 2003
since 2003.
Define movie.
It actually doesn't, an Uwe Boll movie just happens to share its name with the game.
Theres also a SEQUAL (Which still sucks BUT its better than this trash)
Typing of the dead had a better love story.
It had a better *story.*
I never heard of that movie
...Still...better...than...Birdemic...
Better than Twilight and Sharknado.
Somehow.
SuperLordGaming
Blaspheny, NOTHING can compare to the Sharknado!
ZorotheGallade ...Oh God...
The Room is better than that shit
Should do the original 1959 version of House on Haunted Hill.
There's a 1939 version of House on Haunted Hill? Are you sure you didn't mean 1959?
Tom Waits probably means haunted house
Tom Waits Right right my bad, lol
Graeme Evans Nope the 59 House on Haunted Hill, its too funny but really good
psbox362 Me too, the man is simply a legend
This movie sucked even by zombie movie standards.
To be honest, I had never heard of Uwe Boll before. Until The Nostalgia Critic reviewed one of his movies...I think about vampires or something? I don't know. And now there's this one. And...without having seen either movie...yes. I can conclude that Uwe Boll sucks. Bad.
Bloodrayne I guess?
Ah yes, that was the movie. If people like it, that's fine. I know people do love vampires that aren't related to a certain series involving them sparkling and falling for emo, depressed girls. But, Bloodrayne itself...looked god-awful.
he also review Alone in the Dark
Your assessment is correct. He is infamously bad at making movies.
From what I hear, no-one would hire him so he set up his own company just to continue making movies
You have to do The Grinch Stole Christmas starring Jim Carrey.
Darkling276 Great movie, though.
Darkling276 I laughed way too hard at that XD and yeah, there's so much wrong with it I don't think there is enough sin for it.
If they dont do at least ONE christmas movie this month, imma flip shit
psbox362 elf, grinch stole christmas, home alone, a christmas story, the santa clause, others like that
Lmao!!! Discount Chris Pine/Chris Evans and discount Ethan Hawke 🤣🤣🤣
Fun Fact #1 - There is an official 'funny' version of this film that you can buy. It tries to take the piss out of itself, knowing how bad it is, but fails miserably.
Fun Fact #2 - I interviewed Uwe Boll a few years ago and even he admits that most of his films are shit! At least he's honest!
For the holidays there should be Cinnamon Sins
+1 sin for your comment
Jon Palmiere *ding
putting the gun in her holster and having it be reloaded later is the closest similarity to the video game this movie offers
Hey cinema sins, great video, BUT THAT GREY BAR THAT IS COVERING MOST OF THE FOOTAGE IS A NO-GO.
yes, because everyone knows all the good shots in this movie are in the top and bottom eighth of the screen.
yeah, plus that it's distracting as fuck
Yeah I had to go back and see if other videos were like that... Not sure why the video is stretched over the whole screen with translucent bars instead of between black bars like usual.
Love the Max Payne game reference, one of my favorite childhood games
"Who cares! She's naked!" said every guy ever and hopped in! lol 2:11
SUFFER LIKE G DID
SIR GOLD!
GO KULL!
Remember, there's no such thing as second chance
how could anyone do this
My God.
Everything wrong with *MEAN GIRLS* next!!
10:14 she only had a single handgun previously, in the shot of them in a "v" formation.
I'm going to assume this isn't based on Dostoevsky's "The House of the Dead."
Here are your Outro Mashups:
1. Twilight
2. Gordon’s fish sticks
3. Simpsons
4. Pulp Fiction
5. Austin Powers, The Spy Who Shagged Me
6. Pirates of the Caribbean?
7. Sneakers
8. LOTR Fellowship of the Rings
potc indeed
norsie45
Thanks for the confirmation.
I'm disappointed that Das Boot wasn't in there :(
Cybermat47
Yeah that would have been good. Personally I was hoping for an homage to Clint Howard in the outros. There's more than enough material.
Another sin could be that woman saying, "You're obviously no cartographer," when that guy was going the wrong way according to the map. A cartographer is someone who MAKES maps. "Cartographer" does not mean a person who can READ/FOLLOW a map. Yes, it's nit-picky, but who cares? This is CinemaSins!
The fact that this movie use to terrify me as a small child 😂😂😂😂😂😂
A movie called house of the dead that primarily takes place on an Island.
*Ding*
I didn't know islands can't have houses.
yeah but it is called HOUSE of the dead you would think that it would take place in house instead of an Island, but that's just me nitpicking it
jagson9 The games usually only have 1 level of being in a house so its not that bad.
jordino60 except the first which fully happens in a house (and in the weird scientific lab under it, (still part of the house though).
Anyway, contrary to the source material, the characters do not progress through a house/city/scientific laboratory to try to solve the problem, but make every bad cliché horror movies decisions and somehow manage to end up in a convoluted trap laid by the main villain.
In that case should we ding the game as well since it was a mansion?
if a gun auto reloads on holster means is a video game movie, duh.
How about Alone in the Dark? That movie from what I heard is even worse.
At least, you can make fun of House of the Dead. But Alone in the Dark is not even funny.
Speaking of Saw II, I'd love to see you into that movie.
why is it called house of the dead there on a island
It's called house of the dead because the "zombies" were all reanimated in the house that the people found.
You pronunciation of “Das Boot” made me choke on my Sauerkraut.
Everything wrong with House of the Dead... The whole damn movie
I just don't understand WHY The House of the Dead was made into a movie, the game itself has very little story and is really just a coin muncher. Don't get me wrong it's great fun, but out of all the video games they chose this..?
Joseph R-W Two words dude: Uwe Boll.
***** Too true, too true.
Joe Wallace I mean if you took the first 3 installments (maybe even the 4th even though that one sucked imo) you could make a pretty decent film out of it. The zombie lore would be an interesting to develop. For example in most all zombie movies they're portrayed as slow, brainless creatures yet in the HotD franchise they can wield chainsaws and clubs, throw things, and some are even part cyborg. And don't forget those epic bosses with strange powers and Tarot card names.
I could make a decent plot with the story of the first game, a decent writter could make miracles with few elements.
Don't forget those driving zombies and karate chop. Like what???
EVERYTHING WRONG WITH MAX PAYNE (the movie)
Wait, that's has a movie.... I guess I don't know of these because whenever Hollywood wants to make a video game movie, it bombs.
Roxas theNobody just about all video game movies are shit. and the reverse, all video games based on movies are shit
Roxas theNobody it did the bullet time in the game really well I believe used it when it was really dramatic in shoot outs
***** I wasn't too bad, but it just didn't make sense
Roxas theNobody It's weak as hell. For a couple of brief moments it touches on the glories of the game and character, the rest of the time it's just a generic detective / thriller movie. Such a wasted opportunity.
Haha. I remember seeing this in the theater!! I loved the cheap Matrix effects lol