How to Stop Fighting Anxiety and Start Accepting It | EP 050

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  • Опубліковано 20 гру 2024

КОМЕНТАРІ • 89

  • @jf8461
    @jf8461 Рік тому +32

    As someone who went through a period of severe anxiety, I would say that questioning the meaning of life (a valid question in itself, in my opinion) is very common while in that state. BUT pondering that question while your mind is in a hyper-vigilant state is probably the WORST TIME to be asking that question! 😀
    Your #1 priority is to simply ACCEPT things as they are, which will gradually calm your tired nerves, allowing you to regain clear thinking abilities!
    It’s like trying to run a marathon with a leg in a cast. Wait until it is healed! And it WILL heal! 😉💪🏻

  • @JambonMaster
    @JambonMaster Рік тому +16

    Wow I love your no-bullshit approach when explaining. Definitely puts things into a better perspective

  • @danlazer8762
    @danlazer8762 Рік тому +23

    Michelle, you are a gift and have helped more people than you could ever imagine.

  • @jokerski3250
    @jokerski3250 2 місяці тому +3

    One of the big things that helped to stop fighting my anxiety was to realize that really it’s just my brains way of protecting me. It’s doing what it’s designed to do although ot does it when there is no need. It’s like a broken smoke alarm that is telling me there is a fire when there is none. When I changed my perspective on it then my relationship and reaction started to change. Once that happened I was able to start embracing my anxiety and it got better on its own.

  • @clayphillips2203
    @clayphillips2203 Рік тому +8

    This is absolutely brilliant. After years and years of fighting with my anxiety and panic attacks thinking I was “accepting”, I think I finally understand the difference. Thank you so much for the very straightforward way you’ve explained this, it almost makes too much sense. This will be the last video I watch because I know it’s the proper way forward.

  • @catherinerhodes64
    @catherinerhodes64 Рік тому +68

    Had a panic attack in the night, more rushes about 20 minutes ago, but i am going for a walk with my partner, daughter and our dog. Still full of adrenaline and feelings of terror but im going out regardless

    • @elenora67
      @elenora67 Рік тому +9

      I don’t see many people talk about their “rushes” that’s how they feel for me sometimes , like these rushes going upward in my body

    • @cigarettelolita
      @cigarettelolita Рік тому +5

      wow, i’m in a similar situation. except for some reason my anxiety makes me feel incredibly heavy and unsteady like i’m going to fall

    • @jacklepino7805
      @jacklepino7805 Рік тому +2

      Love it! Keep at it, thats the way to get through.

    • @Smiley35S
      @Smiley35S Рік тому +1

      I'm so sorry you go though it too it's the scariest thing ever. I want to get past feeling like I need to call 911 when I have panic attacks.

    • @davecash7669
      @davecash7669 9 місяців тому

      @@elenora67 I get them too. When the anxiety is in the way down I get rushes as well. Like my body is coming down but not feeling safe yet

  • @paultreuscorff1310
    @paultreuscorff1310 Рік тому +16

    Great reminder and great pointers. It’s all about observation without judgement. When are ok with not feeling “ok” we realize we ARE ok. It’s the
    Irony of this disorder. Resistance is the suffering. Peace returns when we let go and just be. No doing, just being. Don’t worry you’ll all get this when you’re done giving it attention.

    • @jovanastanimirovic7892
      @jovanastanimirovic7892 11 місяців тому

      Thank you so much for this! It's so true😊

    • @JoyJoy-pj4jf
      @JoyJoy-pj4jf 5 днів тому

      @@paultreuscorff1310 what about the heavy heart heavy sadness strong depressed feeling

  • @itsbobik
    @itsbobik Рік тому +4

    It is my first time seeing you, although I knew about dare and you are simply delightful to watch and explain things in such a fun way!

  • @kellystdennis5042
    @kellystdennis5042 9 місяців тому +1

    I have just recently stumbled on these DARE videos. You and Shaan Kassum (Another gifted anxiety educator) honestly should be giving seminars and educating the mental health professionals. I have been to so many therapists over the years for anxiety and no one has ever provided this kind of direct and insightful content. I found Claire Weekes books years ago and they definitely helped (I believe she was the first psychiatrist to instruct her patients to accept the thoughts and feelings), but its so helpful to have a modern explanation to these concepts, especially from people who have been through anxiety themselves. You truly are a blessing.

  • @gabriellec2886
    @gabriellec2886 Рік тому +10

    I am so glad I found this channel! I had a wave of anxious energy last night which I knew will affect my sleep, so usually I listen to UA-cam play delta waves sleep music, but this time I played your videos. I needed someone like Michelle to tell me clearly, firmly, and repetitively what's going on and what I'm feeling otherwise my head will start to make up stories and I'll be stuck in a loop. Eventually I dosed off. Thank you so much Michelle and the DARE team! These videos are an extremely valuable resource.

    • @susanlopez4111
      @susanlopez4111 7 місяців тому +1

      Michelle has a way of explaining exactly what I need to hear in laymen's terms so to say ❤ Straight up!!

  • @imover9999
    @imover9999 Рік тому +11

    This video has been so eye opening even after reading the DARE book. Just finished it yesterday from cover to cover. It seems the answer is to just stop fighting. Not a surrender in weakness or giving up, but a surrender of voluntarily allowing and accepting anything that comes to us. Good day? Great! "Bad" day? Also fine, just do what you would with or without that little buddy anxiety tagging along. Easier said than done to let that guard down and just go about life, but it makes so much sense. I didn't worry about anxiety when I was younger, but instead just went about my life... And I wasn't plagued by it. Crazy how that works. 😅 Thanks for sharing this video, you are an incredibly gifted teacher at driving home the point, illustrating it with props, etc.
    *Edit* one example I heard many years ago that helped me a lot was to see thoughts as a river. If we are in the river we will be swept away by it, but we can calmly sit on the river bank and just watch them come and go without being caught up in them. We are not our thoughts is a thing I need to remember. To be mindful of that truth.

    • @carmellasidwell3809
      @carmellasidwell3809 5 місяців тому +1

      When I get bored I get so caught up in thought's. I'm going to remember to just sit by the river and let it flow by!! Thank you!!

    • @imover9999
      @imover9999 5 місяців тому

      @@carmellasidwell3809 Amen I hope it helps! Another one that really helps to remember is by Harry Barry. Discomfort - not danger. It might feel uncomfortable, but there's nothing actually dangerous going on. Best to just sit and let it run it's course and move on with your day. Way easier said than done and I'm so far from mastering it myself.
      If you're Christian I can't recommend praying the rosary highly enough. Any time I've had panic, by the second "decade" of the rosary I'm feeling so much better. Wishing you the best in your recovery!

  • @catz2505
    @catz2505 Рік тому +17

    Everything you said is how I've lived my life. Actually yesterday I was suppose to go to dr. to get clearance for cataract surgery and I managed to give myself so much anxiety being scared that half way to my appt. I had a panic attack, turned car around and came home to where it is safe. This has been my whole life I feel like. The lengths I've gone to avoid something that scared me or made me nervous/panic. I'm a pro at it and I'm old now! I don't want to be this way anymore....I'm tired, it's exhausting. Also it makes you feel like such a failure. I hide from life...my whole life..now I'm older and alone due to it.

    • @avamiller2325
      @avamiller2325 Рік тому +4

      I'm sorry to hear this, but I'm the exact same way 😔

    • @sciencetest8
      @sciencetest8 Рік тому +2

      You just described my whole life. It is so, so difficult to keep going.

    • @bunnygirlmantra
      @bunnygirlmantra Рік тому +2

      Omg you sound like me. It's almost like reading a comment from my future self if I don't get this panic disorder under control. Yikes. I hope we all get better!!

    • @mckaymckay5168
      @mckaymckay5168 Рік тому

      I hope you find peace

    • @bob29576
      @bob29576 Місяць тому +1

      Same here. I wonder if there’s enough time left to get better

  • @sobaanmohammed3304
    @sobaanmohammed3304 Рік тому +3

    Notes -
    1:39 recommending books - lots exist (like DARE!) *but* are you looking for books just for reassurance seeking and to overload on information and certainty? So no books recommended by Michelle. Spend as little time involved in anxiety - anxiety is a doing disorder, of over involvement
    3:55 it's OK to not know 100%. Go live life instead of thinking about life.
    5:55 our alarm centre is concerned with danger and mistakenly sees discomfort as danger. Thoughts, feelings, sensations are safe.

  • @28Dk130
    @28Dk130 10 місяців тому +1

    With all the symptoms I have had after being diagnosed with anxiety disorder and OCD mostly obsessing about my thoughts I have tried everything on planet Earth from medication to exercise and supplements to avoiding some drinks n foods to calming myself down every time I get the horrible physical sensations and watching videos on UA-cam for reassurance it's one thing after another and right now I really want to use Dare to stop running from my anxiety and accept it

    • @LesBeautridge
      @LesBeautridge 5 місяців тому

      Please can I ask how are you doing, 4 months on. I'm in the same situation as your post and stuck in this cycle. Have you found a way out

  • @NicoleFitnessYouTube
    @NicoleFitnessYouTube Рік тому +3

    This was absolutely amazing!! Thank you so much! I am so happy to have found the DARE app! 🎉❤

  • @tooalapcthree5658
    @tooalapcthree5658 6 місяців тому +3

    This is the only way...resistance creates friction that makes anxiety worst..let it flow and allow it 100%..

  • @HotgyalB
    @HotgyalB Рік тому +1

    You honestly have me dwl!!
    I’m guilty of so much of this!!
    What your saying helps me to be aware of my behavior & now I don’t feel so scared.
    This helps so much.
    Thanks!!

  • @zentai4324
    @zentai4324 10 місяців тому

    This is brilliant, Michelle is amazing

  • @lkhoopordie9153
    @lkhoopordie9153 6 місяців тому

    Only 6 minutes in and this is SO good. THANK YOU!!!

  • @annehanses9156
    @annehanses9156 Рік тому +2

    Thank you, you are amazing!!!

  • @Julie-s9l
    @Julie-s9l Рік тому

    Really great explainations, thank you!😊

  • @charleshuntervilleneuve
    @charleshuntervilleneuve 5 місяців тому

    You are very good the way you animate, i feel your energy thank you!

  • @Honey-gl8gv
    @Honey-gl8gv 11 місяців тому +3

    If only I could train my brain to be afraid of wonderful sensations (😂) and perhaps my brain would give me more of that ? ! Lol!!

  • @linettespinoza7366
    @linettespinoza7366 Рік тому +1

    Thank you! I had to hear this

  • @alexjacobson9353
    @alexjacobson9353 3 місяці тому

    This makes it so much easier literally just stop caring and checking about the anxiety weirdly after I heard that it all just like stopped so weird 😂 granted I have been down this road before and came through it now I’m back in the anxiety loop but I know how to get back out of it!

  • @rearwheelslider
    @rearwheelslider 4 місяці тому +2

    This video was so damn informative. Thank you so much.

  • @adammatheson3598
    @adammatheson3598 9 місяців тому

    50:35 Thank you this was great for me and 100% spot on

  • @mcoycobain1805
    @mcoycobain1805 4 місяці тому

    You are so helpful and funny lol thank you!

  • @TheOGfrenchy
    @TheOGfrenchy Рік тому +5

    Really appreciate the dare program very helpful in overcoming anxiety. I would also recommend Dr. Joe Dispenza for anybody who still suffers and is reading this.

  • @arttrip5991
    @arttrip5991 5 місяців тому

    You are hilarious, thank u so much ❤

  • @veggieanimallover7046
    @veggieanimallover7046 6 місяців тому

    I've recently downloaded the app and started reading the book. This was my first podcast I listened to and I feel personally attacked! 😂 Thanks for all the great information.

  • @vhink311
    @vhink311 Рік тому +1

    Hi! Any advice on how not to react to constant anxiety, I guess GAD, and depersonalization. I feel like I’m just in a constant state of overstimulation instead of a sudden onset panic attack

  • @PRAMILAVESH
    @PRAMILAVESH Рік тому +8

    i got out from dpdr : Accept all feelings and stop googeling

  • @sofianedynamique6237
    @sofianedynamique6237 Рік тому +2

    Thank your for this information the god protecte you

  • @CuriousCattery
    @CuriousCattery Рік тому

    The Fountainhead is a good one to read during an existential crisis.

  • @CutieRingoJoy
    @CutieRingoJoy Місяць тому

    I started having tension non stop in my muscles since last August 2023 it cause me to jerk in the bed and it hurts. And Jan 2024 I developed Formication 24/7 it’s so upsetting. I cry so much this year. I’m a overthinker and anxious person I don’t know what to do. I think I need to see a psychiatrist. It’s so hard to stay positive through the pain and itch . Doesn’t help the fact I stuck myself at home

  • @elena_shok
    @elena_shok 9 місяців тому

    Yes i find books and cant stop

  • @Megatron986100
    @Megatron986100 Рік тому +1

    Hello. I try to feel these sensations even more and even tell my brain to give me more as a way of allowing it to be there. If I have chest tightness, I try to feel it more. Is this correct?

    • @Megatron986100
      @Megatron986100 Рік тому +1

      I do this because I’m trying to build skills to sit with discomfort. Not for it to go away.

    • @Megatron986100
      @Megatron986100 Рік тому +1

      Or I should say, capacity to sit with discomfort.

    • @Saiyan61
      @Saiyan61 9 місяців тому

      how do you feel now

  • @jenniferchamberlain1393
    @jenniferchamberlain1393 Рік тому +4

    So am I obsessing by watching videos and reading books on anxiety and making things worse for myself?

  • @itsizzy4574
    @itsizzy4574 10 місяців тому

    Michelle u are literally a god send. All of this makes so much sense.

  • @Bee-mi8ml
    @Bee-mi8ml 6 місяців тому

    You are a hoot!

  • @terminator04201989
    @terminator04201989 Рік тому +2

    I'm tired of the fear of aneurysm stroke or heart attack. Fear of death hypochondria. I need help

    • @sciencetest8
      @sciencetest8 Рік тому +1

      Same here.I don't know what else to do. Not one moment of peace in 5years. I am so full of fear and sadness.

    • @sscapitalofficial
      @sscapitalofficial 9 місяців тому

      Hi, how are you guys now

    • @terminator04201989
      @terminator04201989 9 місяців тому

      Not good

  • @savagebunny1440
    @savagebunny1440 2 місяці тому

    25:00

  • @gerryclarke405
    @gerryclarke405 Рік тому

    Hi why do I have strange dreams every night and I wake up with more feelings I am going through dp pr

  • @tammyrichards9901
    @tammyrichards9901 5 місяців тому

    Detachment is what my son feels like he has do you do one-on-one sessions?

    • @DareResponse
      @DareResponse  3 місяці тому

      Hi, there! Our DARE coaches do one-on-one coaching calls. For further assistance, please feel free to reach out to support@dareresponse.com. Thank you. :)

  • @martamegre
    @martamegre 9 днів тому

    And when anxiety is not panic attacks anymore but lasts 2 or 3 hours with heart palpitations and high blood pressure? My agorophobia now is more about this. A panic attack is kind of a short version and not that scary compared with general anxiety and anxiety attacks of 2 or 3 hours. Dare does not speak a lot about anxiety attacks. Is different from panic attack

  • @nm9857
    @nm9857 3 місяці тому

    I feel like your anxiety monsters impression is a NY cabbie

  • @JenniferRackley-s1g
    @JenniferRackley-s1g 5 місяців тому

    Feel like I'm going to go crazy

  • @danyalkhan1172
    @danyalkhan1172 Рік тому +1

    Can somebody tell me short summary of this topic because my English not good

  • @amberg4775
    @amberg4775 Рік тому

    Do we treat air hunger the same way?? Tell ourselves we’re safe and stop fighting it?

    • @sobaanmohammed3304
      @sobaanmohammed3304 Рік тому +6

      Yes! Air hunger is just a sensation, assuming you're healthy/ non asthmatic etc, it wouldn't be something to worry about. Anxiety can make it feel like you can't get a deep breath in, but in reality your breathing is happening automatically without requiring your involvement

    • @littlemisssunshi4910
      @littlemisssunshi4910 Рік тому

      @@sobaanmohammed3304 sorry to chime in here, but this is the exact question I had as well since air hunger can feel so threatening. Can the dare response still apply if the air hunger is caused by acid reflux, which in itself is being caused by anxiety? Its sort of a whirlwind lol but I imagine given that air hunger caused by acid reflux is benign, then the anxiety around it is the problem and should be treated the same way. Not sure if my opinion is wrong, but I'm curious if others agree

    • @sobaanmohammed3304
      @sobaanmohammed3304 Рік тому

      @@littlemisssunshi4910 if there's a medical cause like acid reflux (which I might have too) then definitely take steps to help that, I always have Gaviscon tablets with me for example. But in any case it's only discomfort, not danger. I raised this with the GP last time I spoke to them and he said it could still be the anxiety causing the refkux, indigestion, heartburn etc

    • @jackiejovanoska7362
      @jackiejovanoska7362 9 місяців тому

      Yes im having that symptom too, like get so tense can't take a deep breath then hyperventilate and think can't breathe which goes to panic. It's that fear that holds those thoughts

  • @scruffypuppy
    @scruffypuppy Рік тому +2

    Sorry but A New Earth by Eckhart Tolle helped me a lot.

    • @XHEADTOWALLX
      @XHEADTOWALLX Рік тому +2

      Yeah I can imagine someone with DPDR and severe anxiety trying to wrap their racing mind around that one.

  • @DisobedientSpaceWhale
    @DisobedientSpaceWhale Рік тому

    I still don't understand how to truly accept anxiety. It just seems like white knuckling

  • @dorothybeveridge3133
    @dorothybeveridge3133 Рік тому +1

    Stop talking about panic , talk about how to deal with it !!

    • @dhunuhrk123
      @dhunuhrk123 Рік тому +3

      Best thing is do not talk , just feel it.