Відео

Is therapy available to only married couples?? How about between me and my girlfriend

So do they know they're not what they're trying to present to the world? 😳

I really liked this video's approach in talking to both "sides", also the positive and constructive attitude and the calm tone reduced my anxiety by a lot already. Many other videos on this topic I've seen are aimed mainly at the anxious partner, giving advice on how to win back the avoidant. Some information given in those videos also helped me and already improved our relationship (and my mental sanity as well), but looking at my partner "from the outside" as the mysterious avoidant that needs to be understood in a way created an emotional rift between us. I also felt a bit manipulative just following the advice of some relationship experts without telling my partner that I'm thinking about them, analyzing their behaviour and changing my own actions in a subtle way to soothe their fears of overwhelming closeness. I'm unsure whether to tell them, since I don't want to seem intrusive and obsessed with them. What can I do in this situation?

🙏❤️🍀🪷

I love the nameless narcissist and you supporting the other side Because if we are really honest We do love the narcissist That’s why we do everything to learn more But you need to learn to love But not give all your love

I would like to know more about the psychological mechanisms behind terrorism.

Understanding my feelings made me so much better ❤❤❤

I'm sure people with NPD suffers way more than anyone who ever had contact with them and I'm really sorry for that. But now that I understand that I realize that I want nothing to do with them. I don't trust my judgment yet and I prefer to be alone.

( Truly, people are Either upright skilled for life's duties and tasks or HOUSE IN BRAIN: THE obnoxious Narcissist procrastinator Syndrome) It's More serious as they do not recognize they are full fledge bully- (ex Narcissist is so brain injured that since I've tried, he scowls at thought to Get Counselors) Police told me he sounds Mentally ill. I told them, Matthew told me he Was told he is mentally ill- 15 years taking Prozac; he tried 3 times to kill himself (his son did kill himself years ago) Police told me anyone can go through court to prove him a danger to himself and We will take him in a paddy wagon. I said, "he would want to die." Later, police said leave it is hostile. * I have recordings to go make a long police report, that show Matthew taking a sledge hammer to a Green works chain saw I paid for. I'll throw you to the ground". I said, "no". He said, "yes, I'll throw you to the ground". Ran after me, Used my sauce pan to hit my truck window 3 hits. Told me, "I'll blow out your trailer windows". "You're jezebel" - 2 or 3 times. "You have a demon" Fact is told by Matthew his first Young to be wife, 17 or 18: her family's house had nighttime demons shaking the sofa he was sleeping on (eery spooky). When Matthew was 5, a big rush came against bedroom window, glass fell on brother in bed. Spooky entities hovered & Matthew said entity/entities (entered him). Matthew set on fire his sister's crib. Started fires in basement. Friends/ twins in school Wreckless driving one night, Matthew saw demons on the twins faces/ got scary distorted, 100 mile an hour driving, went through field, almost hit telephone pole. What caring mother would allow the dad to beat his 2 sons all their young life? Matthew's army dad ruthlessly beat his sons, not the daughter whom he pampered. Tho Matthew tried to stand up at age 13 telling his mother, angrily, I'm not going to take beating. Mother did finally remarry when Matthew was 13. Like most already brain injured families (( God says, I visit the Iniquities of the fathers into the 3rd and 4th generation)) What caring grandmothers & mothers would destroy her son then grandson Matthew with Hydrogen-ated Manmade oils- margarine shortening of devil, too destroy Essential oxygen to brain??? ( Took bait if deceitful devil plot to destroy God's temple. Now I have too much work to get off the narcissist's property. I'm in Michigan, 72, wrote to you, you answered back. I just viewed a very Unjust report on the narcissist's UA-cam channel about me as BEING the problems and looney for 2&1/2 years; All lies, because the sad symptoms of Narcissist are the same descriptions posted everywhere. June 17, 2024 I called the police, because Matthew, said ("I will kill you")/ when he asked me to help with the 'cheaply made flooring' that he tried pounding together on an *Uneven 2x4 floor'* He used fowl Language, yelled, "I'll kill everyone, these (black Sheetrock screws) won't come back out", this flooring is too cheap, I would never buy this cheap stuff." 2022 he alone built All of his unsafe berm structure which leaks, has spider infestation from attached dirt room had to be patched & I suffocated when he burned a thick plastic coffee mug in the Inside woodstove- I felt nauseous & told him- he insensitively argued vehemently and repeats all the Narrow Stuck prideful Wreckless brain upsets even in his 18 minute video since 9 PM last night. I've been here My story of healing and testimony is where I start with new acquaintances as on the phone Feb, 2022, with this narcissist. His mother Had already sent him strong B- vitamins, vitamin C, Xtendavite, Vitamin D, Vit E. I could write a whole book. Only action for Shalom Healing God's provisions blare out- millions follow a better health improved strength. My brother finally asked me for help at age 58. He recovered from suicide, not take Depacote or Prozac. With headaches, pushes himself in prayer, to Still do 'professional' house repair. Proverbs 31: 10-31 ( what SHOULD have been the plumb line of household duties? So that the husband loses nothing all his years/ the Wife has talents, skills to hold the foundation of living life Together. The husband is the task bearer to see family is secure, safe, protected from wolves in sheep's clothing. And that wife has WHAT IS Needed Specifically to Do her jobs AND FEELS/ knows! She is Loved by 'the husband. Not a now days narcissists who constantly rail on her, oblivion sick heads like in Isaiah--!! Isaiah I: 4-6 sinful nation, Laden with Iniquity, While HEAD IS SICK, no soundness from the sole of your foot To the top of your head ....😓. Susan

I wonder how many people came here with an anxious attachment style? Seems like it makes more sense for the anxious person to search on UA-cam for an answer and for an avoidant person to find that video of a cat playing chopsticks with chopsticks .

This is excellent advice! Thank you for the practical tips. I’d want to add to follow your gut. In the past before I’ve known whether I had a narcissistic boss or just one that I needed to communicate my boundaries with, I followed my gut responses about whether to confront unpleasant behaviour or hide my feelings about it and keep quiet and keep a record. My gut has actually been a really good guide.

The little pyro in me🔥

I recently realized I’m an echoist. It’s been a relief understanding that it’s not just me. I’m also realizing why being my own wedding planner traumatized me! 😅

Is like bully they r weak so they atack others that's how this look like for me

Wearing sunglasses inside is a sure sign of a narcissist

Howdy hi hi, I find that understanding the trauma I've suffered is a far more useful tool than just anger. For you see I have an anger response to instances where I experience fear, or attempts to intimidate me into submission. With understanding, I can then set boundaries, and choose beforehand my responses to those who don't respect those boundaries. My favorite reply to boundary breaking is to deny them the privilege of my audience. For to have another person listen to you. Is a privilege, one that can be lost by misdeeds.

Very important information, thank you! ❤🙏🪷🍀

Only words of wisdom ❤❤❤

When I was a teen I was angry with my father all the time. Now I know why: he never protected my sister and I from my mother's abuse. He enabled her behavior to protect himself. Understanding the reasons for my feelings is so important and helpful ❤

The thought of asking my now ex-girlfriend for an entire weekend of time to myself is just unthinkable. There's no way she wouldn't have freaked out about that and accused me of not loving her enough or appreciating her. It's absolutely something I wanted to communicate sometimes, though.

What if the person that caused me to become avoidant is the person I need to try to trust again? That’s difficult.

Why Donald Trump won the popular vote.

Anger can also cloud judgement and make you weak, nothing is stronger than a clear head and a blanced mental

Hi, YES! Npd's are Soo damaged that many report "they Refuse counsel"* I just left one after 2 & 1/2 yrs. He threatened me_ ( I recorded him) I'll throw you down, I'll kill you, told me I don't know about good health, constant berating nit picking Micro manager. ( he talked on phone_ heard my now stable health testimony_ agreed *about health, Morals, commitment,) a century **Unknowledgeable parenting about plants and herbs, of traumatic parent disorders/ dads beating 2 young sons, mother too scared to get help :=(( Unhealthy manmade margarine shortening hydrogenated oils AND overload Oils in recipes IS THE PHYSICAL DAMAGE/STORMS TO ALL OF BODY AND BRAIN.

Using lube takes away from the death grip stroking!!!

I have a question, is it possible to be equally anxious and equally avoidant at the same time because I think I’m in a relationship with someone where I think we are both equally both types, and it’s brutal.

I’m avoidant then primarily but I used to be the anxious type a couple years back, and still have a little bit of that left in me I feel.

I needed this message today ❤

This has to be the best and most helpful and insideful interview i’ve seen. Thank you Jacob for showing so much of how your mind works and how you feel.

He needed to wear sunglasses. That says it all 😂 insecurity to the max! Thanks for the inteview you both.

Thank you for this. I discovered three years ago my husband was a "porn addict". For me, it wasn't the addiction that was the real problem. The problem was all the severe gaslighting he had been doing to me for 30 plus years that came to light as a result. I was already suspicious he was a narc (after many years of research). He was all sorry and wanted to change and make things right. Even, for the first time ever, agreed to go to marriage councelling. The trauma I was put through by the THERAPISTS was unbelievable! So here I was, trying to figure out if he is STILL gaslighting me (I already knew he gaslighted me for years but I did not realize the extent it had been) and just using different tactics this time or if it was real. None of them believed me when I tried to explain our history. We did start out with all the "traditional" S-ANON and SLA and "trained in the field" therapists. The all round take in that community is "Poor innocent victim men" The women and their trauma from it?? Not the guys fault. Its the womens shitty "before marriage" history that is the real problem. You need to work on that. They even refer to US as "ill" and being "sober" (meaning we are not having "meltdowns" over our husbands anymore and treating THEM like shit) And the guys get parties and medals for "being sober" while the women deal quietly with their trauma and get no recognition for what they have been through. The sex addict therapist my husband started with had videos on UA-cam. One an interview with a husband "addict" and one, later down the road, with the "addicts" wife. The husband was all happy and laughing and talking about now he LIKES when he gets trigger now (to act out) cuz its a challenge to him! The wife?? Still a wreck. Couldn't smile. This same therapist told my husband he was NOT to tell me he loved me or he was sorry ..... (The therapists that traumatized me where not "sex addiction" therapists)

All the local musicians I’ve ever met are their own biggest fans, so yes…narcissists

The analogy of the prison door opening, and walking through without permission was an amazing analogy. Thank you.

Avoidants are super selfish people who just do not care of anything. Totally hopeless case.

Re-framing the experience of being abused by a narcissistic person as a terrorist attack is an excellent way of looking at this.

⚠❤Children are going to disappear around the world, then His adult TRUE believers. It is JESUS coming back to pick up His people! Make Him your Lord and Saviour! Do not stay for apocalypse!❤🥹 Jesus promised 2 000y ago that He will come back for everybody who accepted His payment ( His death for our sins)❤ He is about to remove His believers from this earth (Rapture) so they won’t stay for the Judgement. He loves you like crazy! He doesn't want you to stay for that! God's Grace is about to run out.❤🥹 What saves us is trust in what Jesus did on the cross: He died for our sins and then defeated the death by rising 3 days later! He made it very simple, He has done it all for us so don't add anything to it, just believe and trust Him! 🙌❤He does not want rituals, He wants a relationship with you! Right before He comes to pick up His believers we will witness Russia attacking Germany. Missiles hitting USA ( by Russia, China, North Korea), Fall of Freemason's Temple in Philadelphia, Alaska earthquakes back to back of magnitude 7.6 and 7.3. We will also see return of Yasser Arafat. This is all been revealed by Jesus's prophets right now.❤ Call out to Him today, ask the God of universe, your maker, to reveal himself to you! You want to know the truth after all, don't you?

Strategies start at 6:39.

winged monkeys do not come from wizard of oz

Narcissists are emotional terrorists.

Thank you 🙏 this was helpful information ❤

The best advice when this is happening is to NOT TALK WITH THEM AT ALL .

Acceptance is freedom ❤

Anger is the greatest notification for us to act on our compassion ❤ 💯!!!

I had nobody. That is why he 'chose' me and trapped me. He is abusing someone else now and thinks that by ignoring me he is hurting me. I'm not dumb. I watched him set up a new narrative and flipped the script on him. I feel awful for having to be covert and manipulative towards another human being but he is dangerous and does not deserve my respect. I hope his new woman finds her anger and flattens him. That man needs to be locked away in a corrections facility.

...that's, I never see it that way. I guess that means I still love myself in a way

My relationship of a year and nine months ended just two weeks ago. As stated in the video above, I suppressed my feelings. It had backfired on me tremendously and it caused the downfall of my relationship. (I know I’m not to blame) I was heavily disrespected, lied to, manipulated, and once I was angry, my ex also used my insecurities as ammunition. Once I was finally told “Go home and wait for me, or leave but pack your things. I don’t care.” It was enough for me to give myself the respect I deserved, it devastated me, but I finally left. I put my heart and soul into my ex and she immediately moved on from it and started a smear campaign against me.

Honestly, not only did I not take care of myself mentally and emotionally in the relationship I was in, I also stopped taking care of myself physically. I struggled often to get myself to even shower. The stage I’m in, is using my anger as fuel and motivation to take care of myself physically like I never have before. I exercise regularly now, shower at least every other day, and I give my body the love and respect it deserves. All fueled by anger.

Ty for this video

Great vid

Thank you Dr. Ruth Harpur 🙏🪷