Відео

Omg addiction is not a disease It’s the same thing as shopping for clothes when you clearly have enough , it’s the same as wanted to have more sex than your partner wants and indulging anyway through porn or what ever , it’s the same as over eating repeatedly in food that cause a dopamine rush , it’s the same as working over time over and over to your detriment in the name of money. Anything can become an addiction , not a disease . Yes some addictions are more non functioning to live with . There are many levels to addiction . It’s a program that needs to be acknowledged realized , “ and then healed with love . Self love and the love of your family . Sorry I don’t agree with labeling people with this “ bad aweful thing “ it’s our teacher . And we chose it to evolve our soul . It’s not a bad thing . God bless you both 🙏🏻❤️

Shouldn’t have to communicate that you need your husband to clean up after himself. Asking for help with the domestic chores that need to get done on a daily basis to keep the household moving forward implies that it is solely her job. She shouldn’t have to delegate these things…

Omg you just solved a million of my problems in less than 5 minutes ❤

Thank you for the work it took to come to this realization. Y'all are doing something beautiful. Many blessings to you both!

philly here. recovery rocks

Ok yay we into it ..great saying at start...

Do they always banter at the start...it's on double speed but 7mins in still chatting about nothing...

I detached with love in his active addiction. I left he kept using, had an affair. We got back together knowing he had and addiction he quit that day on his own. 3 weeks later I found out about his affair but still wanted to repair things. He went from proving himself to being angry, frustrated with me for talking about his addiction,affair, no connection,etc. for a year and two months he has been sober but hasn’t done any work on hisself except getting rid of old friends, changing his number, going to and from work, and being accountable for money. He got diagnosed with major depression and says this is probably why he was feeling terrible and not able to handle talks. The connection is what we lack, sex just feels like nothing from him. He say he has the want but before meds he had no motivation or desire on meds he says the want is there but no sensation. I would like to think he feels sexual or turned in by me and flirt, grab, kiss etc. but he says if he doesn’t feel he can have sex he doesn’t feel like doing it. It just seems he doesn’t want or desire me anymore. I try to look nice to spark something. He says you look nice but that is as far as it goes. It’s like he is dead inside. He used to get excited to have sex before the addiction but he wasn’t very sexual then either. But during his addiction to cocaine he wanted sex upwards of 2-3 times per week because he was lonely and we weren’t together

Where is part 1

A lot of really solid insights here. Thank you. I’ll add, if you are dealing with a narcissistic person who refuses and/or is incapable of self-reflection or learning skills to self-regulate & have empathy, compassion, & all the basic human needs we are hard wired to need in a healthy relationship- the victims reactive defense will not be able to stop in this same toxic & abusive relationship…GET OUT and get proper support. The last one is what I didn’t fully understand the importance of, and my ex husband found a way to abuse me worse through our kids after I left him. And it’s devastatingly affected our kids and I.

Victims NEED to voice record and document everything. Especially if the abuser is highly narcissistic and you have kids together. Writing down is not sufficient in these dangerous situations.

The first Weekly call was so amazing! You all are such beautiful people for giving us all so much support! The course Independently Strong has changed my life! Being aware of the behaviors is so important! ❤

Does this really work??? How do I detach with love without causing an argument???

I just want to say that your video is exactly what I was going through. I had a fiance that was a closet alcoholic and it broke my heart. I would find empty mini shots in the cabinets and trash. The broken promises of getting sober and church meetings. The jekyl and hide moments. I have a child and she has 2 kids. I just had enough. I know you stuck through it but I just couldn’t take it anymore. So thank you so much. I listen to this over and over on my walks. ❤

Thank you so much!!!! When is it appropriate to share with partner he just out of recovery ?

You mentioned spouses or ex spouses of addicts, but what about siblings of a recovering addict. Or is the mckinney event more of a couples thing?

From one creator to another, love the impact you all are having for people that need to feel seen and heard.

The CRAFT method I have found in my studies is more effective than a traditional intervention.

My husband will never say those words. That's my problem. I jave said I'm done with you because he doesn't want help in spite of several hospital stays Dr's telling him he is in danger of cirrhosis. Good for you, it's so hard.

Sometimes it's a 1 year program.

This hit home. Thank you for all your podcasts! I DID feel alone until I found your podcasts and community.

Great episode!

Betrayal trauma is so horrible

I just ended my relationship with my addict. I hope he gets the help he needs

⬆️ yep...agitate!

Thank you so much. This was very validating and helpful.

Came here to see the face! Fun to watch you guys in video format!! 🙂

What is the name of the lady re dry drunk My husband is a dry drunk for a year now and things are terrible He treats me terrible for sticking up for myself and now he daily criticizes me bc I’m struggling with mental illness He cut me off emotionally sex and finances and keeps me with nothing I don’t know what to do but this minester is not my husband Now he doesn’t want to fix anything or work thru it he just wants me out of his life and get a job and throw me away I’ve been a at home mom for 7 years and he says I stayed home to use him for rent money That is absurd. I’ve been in and out of the program the last 7 years trying to get and stay sober He is now sober and says his drinking was a forgive and forget and everything I do is magnified and our life has been made look like I did all this to us My biggest mistake thinking that when he got sober he’d finally love me

Do you guys consider MAT as “recovery”? Should it be treated differently?

This sounds EXACTLY like what my X did to me. I thought it was narcissistic behavior. He was into drugs and didn’t work. What he said wasn’t what he did. Everything was my fault and he had an excuse for EVERYTHING. He would have made an EXCELLENT lawyer but he would’ve had to go to school and study and he wasn’t into working for anything.

I find that when I am resentful it's because I didn't hold my boundaries or I needed better boundaries.

Because you admitted you wanted to fix it and you asked for help! Amazing

😢

My AH has depression. We have been separated 2 months. He is in a program, and he stated to me yesterday, that I should not blame him but his problem for drinking. So no apologies to me. I needed this today

My fiance has been using and told me it was one thing, turn out to be something worse than I thought... Idk how to handle it.. am I stupid for giving him chances? Idk what to do.. I'm at a loss here.. please help..

I was so angry for so long because I didn’t keep my boundaries. Very good.

Unfortunately I had to be the villain in my daughter’s life! I tried my best to convince her to get help for herself tried to get her into rehab but nothing worked me and my family decided just let her go and hoped that once she got her rock bottom she would finally get the help she needed! We just lost her a few days ago she had passed away from her usage! I have been wondering what all else I could have done to reach her but deep down I know she would have done what she wanted to do! And there was nothing I could do to stop it from happening

🙏🙏🙏

Thank you guys for continuing talking us through the hard stuff that always seems to have a grey area and never seems to make sense❤

Thank you for being truthful !!!!🙏

It’s Gary Sinise

Keep doing this please. This explains I m not to blame or have problems not associated with his addiction.

This was on point what I dealt for 10yrs. He broke up with me blaming me for his use. He called me and did everything you talked about. He talks to me in anger. He s sober now 7wks and says I m his worst his mistake. It breaks my heart.

Thanks for saying it. Sexual coercion fucking sucks. Guess this is his episode. FFS. I love you guys!!!

I’m sure you figured it out within the last 8 months but…for the crowd-agitate/agitation 😅❤️

"promosm"

Favorite episode yet. Still playing catch up, but…So good chef’s kiss👏🏻👏🏻👏🏻🤌🏻❤️‍🔥❤️‍🔥

Now I need a meat pie 😅🤤🤤

I will now only ever refer to charcuterie boards as charcoochie boards 🤣🤣 and now I understand the queso video 😆

As the wife of an alcoholic, it’s so difficult to find help for myself. Everyone wants to focus on the addict and not the partner