If you're exploring reconciliation with your spouse, consider getting our Exploring Reconciliation Toolkit: marriagehelper.com/product/exploring-reconciliation/ Blessings, Marriage Helper
Oui j'explore surtout une fois à la personne qui me convient devant tous mes pensées uniques en tans qu 'humain très respectifs oui je sais bien encore une fois et pour tous merci beaucoup
I dont like the way the lady said - even if you cheated, don't put all the blame on yourself. A cheater is always responsible 100%. Every relationship has less beautiful periods, but if you notice you are drifting apart, you are responsible to initiate talk and fix it.
@@jessdrocha i gave mine a second chance years ago. Its not been easy. Hes now 68 me age 64. it ture me apart when it happened. I decided to make a go of it. Its been hard.
@@joanncoopertroupe3506 i feel like I'm competing with something I can never be better than. (Internet/porn/fantasy). Its degrading to say the least and has nearly destroyed any amount of self worth or adequacy i had built up. The worst is the dishonesty. He wont even be honest about it and that makes it very difficult to move past and begin healing. Its like he's defending it bc he's protecting it...and I'm the crazy jealous partner (which has never been my norm). It just really hurts and feels like I'm fighting this fight alone, alot. Anyway, im sorry, thanks for letting me share all that bc what I meant to say was "thank you" for sharing ur encouraging testimony. God bless you and yours ♡
You described my exact story. After 49 years I would have expected more respect. He continues to lie so he puts me back to the first day. He lies to my face even when he knows that I know he is lying. I don’t trust him and it is his fault. He is actually making me wonder if he has been lying to me more than just over this emotional affair. He is killing my trust and feelings.
Exactly what I'm going through. Cheaters are liars. Sucks to find out the hard way, after investing SO much, and believing them for so long,, doesn't it.
I’m going through the same thing I feel like he lies and lies and lies and lies and turns every story into where he’s the victim but I know his pattern of flirtation he loves women and the way he talks to them is so seductive I just can’t take it anymore
Lying when they’re cheating and you break up that’s different. But when you both decide to try make things work and you’re reconciling and you find out they’re still lying and was talking to the affair partner/ saw them them it makes it really hard to ever trust.
Thanks for your excellent work. IT is Christ's love in Action. Thanks Joe for founding marriage helper. You all are a huge blessing. Johanna from Berlin
I am so glad I found your channel. I’m in this same situation. I didn’t cheat on my wife the problem was I was on dating site I didn’t hook up with anybody just stupidly shopping around. My wife saw my search history and saw them. She asked me about it I panicked and lied. I’m sorry that I did this. She wants a divorce. I been in therapy for awhile doing the work but my wife still wants out.
Going through the same. I have an addiction to Pron. I've become such a huge liar and lie to her face when she's caught me. We are about to get separated. I'm moving out this weekend.
Yes, you know what they are capable of. You hope, where as once upon a time you honestly believed they wouldn't cheat. Now you know better, and you have to reconcile this better knowledge with the present and future life you may or may not have together.
In my opinion that is impossible. Once done the first betrayal the second will be so much easier. If you take back a cheater what is coming to you is on you. You can have a second chance but with somebody else.
I was betrayed, abused and neglected as a child and I have never grown natural trust for anyone in my whole life, ever. Every time I trust someone it is a decision to trust, a wilful choice to believe in someone despite the fact that the trust doesn’t come to me organically. It is very difficult to do and can only come to you through a leap of faith. But let’s be clear, if someone betrays me even once in a significant sense I will never trust them again.
Wouldn’t your wife’s voice be a sense of calm? Maybe he doesn’t like to talk; because he’s busy doing things he shouldn’t be. Why on earth would a husband not desire and look forward to those calls? That doesn’t make sense. If he’s tired or stressed take a night to relax but you’d think he’d desire the connection despite the distance. I get what Kimberly is saying and she obviously has the experience; but something still doesn’t seem right.
I learned from my therapist that you don't have to forgive, but you definitely have to accept and move on, with or without your partner. I decided to move on with my unfaithful husband, but I'll never forgive him nor trust him. I still love him a lot.
Hi Dr Joe Bean and Kimberly Holmes. I would like to ask, if my husband's reason he wants out. Is because he said he cannot accept betrayal, hence cannot accept his wife. He said its not about hurt or not understanding or that his wife has repent and change. How can the marriage be saved?
If you're exploring reconciliation with your spouse, consider getting our Exploring Reconciliation Toolkit:
marriagehelper.com/product/exploring-reconciliation/
Blessings,
Marriage Helper
Oui j'explore surtout une fois à la personne qui me convient devant tous mes pensées uniques en tans qu 'humain très respectifs oui je sais bien encore une fois et pour tous merci beaucoup
I dont like the way the lady said - even if you cheated, don't put all the blame on yourself.
A cheater is always responsible 100%.
Every relationship has less beautiful periods, but if you notice you are drifting apart, you are responsible to initiate talk and fix it.
Absolutely agree.
@@jessdrocha i gave mine a second chance years ago. Its not been easy. Hes now 68 me age 64. it ture me apart when it happened. I decided to make a go of it. Its been hard.
@@joanncoopertroupe3506 i feel like I'm competing with something I can never be better than. (Internet/porn/fantasy). Its degrading to say the least and has nearly destroyed any amount of self worth or adequacy i had built up.
The worst is the dishonesty. He wont even be honest about it and that makes it very difficult to move past and begin healing. Its like he's defending it bc he's protecting it...and I'm the crazy jealous partner (which has never been my norm). It just really hurts and feels like I'm fighting this fight alone, alot.
Anyway, im sorry, thanks for letting me share all that bc what I meant to say was "thank you" for sharing ur encouraging testimony. God bless you and yours ♡
Absolutly
Indeed! If you cheat it’s your fault and no one else and you should feel guilty and ashamed!
You described my exact story. After 49 years I would have expected more respect. He continues to lie so he puts me back to the first day. He lies to my face even when he knows that I know he is lying. I don’t trust him and it is his fault. He is actually making me wonder if he has been lying to me more than just over this emotional affair. He is killing my trust and feelings.
Exactly what I'm going through. Cheaters are liars. Sucks to find out the hard way, after investing SO much, and believing them for so long,, doesn't it.
I’m going through the same thing I feel like he lies and lies and lies and lies and turns every story into where he’s the victim but I know his pattern of flirtation he loves women and the way he talks to them is so seductive I just can’t take it anymore
An "AFFAIR" is an "AFFAIR"
NO EXCUSES for Betraying your partner
No excuse no reason to betray, if marriage means anything nothing to throw away
Lying when they’re cheating and you break up that’s different. But when you both decide to try make things work and you’re reconciling and you find out they’re still lying and was talking to the affair partner/ saw them them it makes it really hard to ever trust.
Thanks for your excellent work. IT is Christ's love in Action. Thanks Joe for founding marriage helper. You all are a huge blessing. Johanna from Berlin
I am so glad I found your channel. I’m in this same situation. I didn’t cheat on my wife the problem was I was on dating site I didn’t hook up with anybody just stupidly shopping around. My wife saw my search history and saw them. She asked me about it I panicked and lied. I’m sorry that I did this. She wants a divorce. I been in therapy for awhile doing the work but my wife still wants out.
any update ? How are things
Hi, did you guys worked out ?
I’m going through a similar situation, and I’m lost on what to do.
Going through the same. I have an addiction to Pron. I've become such a huge liar and lie to her face when she's caught me. We are about to get separated. I'm moving out this weekend.
All affairs are emotionally connected
I don't think you can ever trust them again!!!
You never will because now you know what they are capable of
Yes, you can. It's possible
Yes, you know what they are capable of. You hope, where as once upon a time you honestly believed they wouldn't cheat. Now you know better, and you have to reconcile this better knowledge with the present and future life you may or may not have together.
In my opinion that is impossible. Once done the first betrayal the second will be so much easier. If you take back a cheater what is coming to you is on you. You can have a second chance but with somebody else.
I hate everything I did to her
Couldnt assist the premier but, here i am.
I was betrayed, abused and neglected as a child and I have never grown natural trust for anyone in my whole life, ever. Every time I trust someone it is a decision to trust, a wilful choice to believe in someone despite the fact that the trust doesn’t come to me organically. It is very difficult to do and can only come to you through a leap of faith. But let’s be clear, if someone betrays me even once in a significant sense I will never trust them again.
Wouldn’t your wife’s voice be a sense of calm? Maybe he doesn’t like to talk; because he’s busy doing things he shouldn’t be. Why on earth would a husband not desire and look forward to those calls? That doesn’t make sense. If he’s tired or stressed take a night to relax but you’d think he’d desire the connection despite the distance. I get what Kimberly is saying and she obviously has the experience; but something still doesn’t seem right.
Get rid of the cheating spouse.
What if he’s still cheating how do you forgive such a person?
Forgive and move on with your life
Forgive yourself and move on without them.
I learned from my therapist that you don't have to forgive, but you definitely have to accept and move on, with or without your partner. I decided to move on with my unfaithful husband, but I'll never forgive him nor trust him. I still love him a lot.
Hi Dr Joe Bean and Kimberly Holmes. I would like to ask, if my husband's reason he wants out. Is because he said he cannot accept betrayal, hence cannot accept his wife. He said its not about hurt or not understanding or that his wife has repent and change. How can the marriage be saved?
That is his deal breaker.
The affair is still is still going on and it’s not stopping
I was told not to trust u by marriage helper, you’re just going to take my funds from me!!!!
I had someone unfaithful But I asked me to forgive them so I did
I chose to believe him. Boy was I wrong.
Need to know more about STOPs
Thankyou for everything.
Lisa from Papua New Guinea
You dont
You guys mentioned a counselor in north Alabama that was very good. I'm in Huntsville alabama . Could you send me her info?
I can't even describe how much this relates...
Found you back in 2016... still love your content. Thanks for all you do.
Je suis convaincu sur ce point oui
Yes 👍🏾
He doesnt care if i say your lying to me then it curses and swears and calls me idiot and more filthy language
No. Never ever
The sound sounds garbled