2:00 “It never ceases to amaze me: we all love ourselves more than other people, but care more about their opinion than our own.” - Marcus Aurelius, 180AD
As a die hard introvert I can 100% confirm. I've had so many people compliment me after the fact and left a good impression. But I'm terrified of approaching strangers and striking a conversation. You could probably more easily get me to charge into a hail of gunfire than chat up a woman at a bar.
I'm an introvert, i have mainly close friends because i get sick of the effort of groups and often with out trying do my own thing, only opening up to those in ear shot. You my friend are shy, if you've seen and want to chat to the women but are afraid too its just a trait of been shy. Having introverted personality is harder cause most people don't understand and distant them self's when you refuse to engage once, it makes the next encounter harder even if you want to try but i guess i also seek and value time alone. I guess it goes hand in hand.
Know Your Defect Heh, I’m not depressed or anything, just that I found solace in learning new things, and kept my emotion fluctuations to minimum so I won’t have to deal with the negativities. Think > Feel, something like this helps a lot. But thank you tho.
“Conversations with new people can be sort of terrifying” Replace _“sort of terrifying”_ with _“extremely traumatizing”_ then that sentence will be relatable
I don't think people really like me. I've been told that usually people that meet me for the first time later describe me as "strange". Now, what that strange means I may never know, but I'm sure it doesn't mean likable.
The worst case scenario is that you have a mental illness. If, (and I do mean "if"), that's the case, you have a journey ahead. The most important decision you'll make is whether to accept the often substandard help that's readily available, or to be a " snob" and demand better.
Nah they just can't immediately put you in some existing bucket. See the part about social norms in the video - you can simply choose to act more predictable in a general way and you'll stop being strange.
I bring an ice pick, seems people like it when I hold it up during conversation or point it at them... I mean, they act more eager to please, at least. So... I keep doing it.
2:34-2:43 that is SHOCKINGLY accurate on how I am in every group conversations...also most of the time when I try chiming in on something I get cut off by someone else talking.
You might not be talking as loudly as you think you are. I have that problem. What sounds like normal speaking volume to others, sounds like I'm yelling to me. What sounds like I'm speaking normally to me, sounds like borderline whispering to others lol. In the past I used to think people were constantly cutting me off or ignoring me. The reality was that people just straight up couldn't hear me.
@@RockBandRS I don't know. I've had plenty of times were I start talking and they turn and look right me but someone else starts talking and they immediately focus on that person instead. Which always changes the topic that everyone continues on with. Leaving the comment I wanted to say left behind.
@@milesmallon Thats because people dont think you're important or because they dont care about you as much as the other person. People prioritize others over others. Ive known this since middle school personally and its a hard pill to swallow, those people are usually not your true friends. It can also be because what you're saying doesn't interest them.
Brit is totally my favorite!!! She exhibits a wonderful intelligence and an obvious excitement about whatever she is talking about...especially when it isn't a scripted session! I like her so much that I listened tu the infomercial part at the end...I usually bail early!
There are no tricks, you should talk about stuff that interest you, if people dont like you for that, you are hanging with wrong people. Would you be glad that someone is tricking you into thinking they enjoy what you are talking about?? The only trick is to respect and be proud about what YOU like. That is what people are attracted to.
Find a common interest, that's an easy way to get lost in conversation. Find a relevant question/statement regarding whatever social situation you're in. I find that's an extremely successful way to start a conversation.
At school everyone wants to sit next to me and I got popular pretty fast even though I'm shy. It's insane. In elementary school nobody liked me because I was strange but now people that I don't even know come up to me and ask me if I wanna sit with them. It makes me really happy.
"You wouldn't worry so much about what others think of you if you realized how seldom they do. "A quote likely misattributed to Eleanor Roosevelt (11 October 1884 - 7 November 1962) David Foster Wallace (21 February 1962 - 12 September 2008) - "You will become way less concerned with what other people think of you when you realize how seldom they do." DFW quote is accurate but where's the source for ER's quote? According to Quote Investigator the originator is probably Olin Miller "You probably, wouldn’t worry about what people think of you if you could know how seldom they do!” as appeared in the widely syndicated newspaper column of Walter Winchell in January 1937.
Personally my favorite episode of SciShow Psych to date, and I've been watchign SciShow since 2012! And I loved the part at 2:42 where you said the "on know the moment went bye" I feel that way almost every time too. Would love to see more episodes like this one targeting social economics like this one touches on!
Am extremely anxious and pretty observant. Usually when SciShow (Psych) lets out the "but being aware of this effect existing can make you less sensitive to it", I roll my eyes because, well, of course I knew it existed. Pretty observent remember? So I was already trying to self-correct a bit for years, etc. etc. First time this sentence is uttered and I'm actually learning information that could be a bit life-changing. Yes I'm still extremely anxious, thus my negative bias will still be huge. But now I know I have good arguments to temper it even a little bit. And that is priceless. I come here for science and studies. But at this very moment, those channels just became more than a hobby. Thank you.
This is comforting, but that comfort is lost on the feeling of being sad that I had to be told people (probably) like me more than I think. But then, I am a pessimist. I usually think nobody really likes me and act as such, since it's safe to do so, and safety is comfortable. Either way, thanks Sci Show! I needed to hear this on a rough Valentine's Day.
Wow, I would have never guessed that this is a real thing and other people experience it, too! I'm not sure if I'm still a little extreme in that regard since it takes a couple of months and several times of people asking me to join them going somewhere or stuff until I can accept that they actually like me and even willingly want to spend time with me instead of just being nice. And the point about group conversations was also very accurate. I miss opportunities to add something to the conversation a lot because I thought a second to long about it and they're already at another topic and I'm also being cut off a lot. That's why I feel most comfortable speaking to just one other person or with the right people two or three others is also fine.
I think the thing that makes me doubt myself is the fact that people always gossip about others. I keep thinking "Wow, if they're talking bad about *this* person, I don't even want to know what they say about me".
Hopefully you’ve met some new people, since there are plenty of people who don’t gossip this much, or at all. Also, gossip doesn’t actually have to be negative! People seem drawn to scandals, but gossip is a way for people to cognitively remind themselves of who’s in their social circle and what they’ve been up to lately… which can AND SHOULD include positive things!
This video is actually just on time. A very nice and cool new boy showed up at school, and I'm terrified of embarrassing myself in front of him. Although we talked for a bit and he seems to think I'm pretty okay, so at least I haven't messed up yet.
I feel like I am likable to my coworkers, I feel confident about myself when I’m out in public. I don’t have social anxiety or other issues. But I still don’t have any friends. It’s weird.
There's also the "fool-gap" That's when you have a distorted vision of someone (usually thinking that the person is amazing and that you would build an amazing family together) after talking to the person only once (:
You're not responsible for whether other people like you or they don't. You're responsible for being authentic. Or, to put it another way, "If you have integrity, nothing else matters. If you don't have integrity, nothing else matters." ~Alan Kooi Simpson
I like meeting new people and usually give people the benefit of the doubt. Respect is given without hesitation, not earned, but can be lost. Chances are pretty high that most people like me more than I like myself, regardless of a first meeting or lifelong friendship. That is not a thing I would use to relate to people (bloody depressing, really). Makes for horrible conversation. Better to wear a smile share a laugh. I think most people are generally good and want peace. Being positive at the outset is far more memorable.
That feeling when you talk to someone you really like, and after the conversation ends you think you were the most awkward person in existence (even though nothing awkward happened and he actually laughed at your lame joke) and then never dare to talk to that person again.. saddest part is the fact he's a coworker so i see him 4 days in the week, fml
I disagree uness they also have social anxiety, which worsens the condition as a whole. Those lucky enough to not be burdened by both at the same time can easily learn social skills, especially at a young age and then they're essentially fine socially.
@@mycelia_ow if you go back to the video, she clearly specifies that the like-gap is a common thing among most of us, not just people with light/severe social disorders.
I despise myself and others so when good or fantastical situations pop up I tend to be surprised and even panicked by them. Like if a person I found attractive engages a conversation with scares me greatly. I would try and flee the situation like a fight gone bad.
but how do you know you underestimated it? maybe the other Person just said she liked you in that study to seem nicer? Or she didn't really know you so she just avoided a false negative, to not be unfair in his or her accounts.
Impossible to know. The human variable will always be there unless we somehow figure out precisely what makes us tick to a tee. On the other hand, people do that socially anyway so it's accurate in a different way.
I always give positive feedback if I have it. Things like saying "you're really cool" or "you're pretty cute/good looking" or "I hope we'll end up as friends" etc, because I think that's something most people will either enjoy hearing or don't mind hearing. It has creeped people out before, but its just my genuine feelings, so I think I should express them.
My brother likes to tell me I'm not as unsocial as I think I am. But this whole video reminds me of a time where me and my brother were at this thing for a week, and (according to him anyway) people came up to him and were like "Are you [generic angst's] brother? They're pretty cool!" I mean I'd rather that people tell me that I'm cool rather than tell other people that I'm cool, cause y'know, self esteem.
I don't think most people should be discouraged about not making friends. Most people enjoy talking to me but it's circumstantial. Most of the time people are in their own worlds and don't care enough to try to be more than a coworker or basic friend. Which is fine because true friendship requires effort from both parties.
I may be likable, but I surely don't like many others. I get irrationally angry at people if I have to spend too much time around them. That is the reason why I am a trucker, I get to be alone most of the day and night and listen to my audiobooks.
Now i just think people will think i'm been 'cocky' because i think they like me because i know about the liking gap but in reality me knowing about the liking gap makes me less likable because i'm not judging my self to correct unlikable behavior i think.
I have noticed I am particularly difficult for people who are insecure, at least for a while as we are developing a social relationship, since I don’t conform to all the social norms they have come to expect (however conscious or unconscious). I don’t give a lot of feedback because I’m reserved... due to having suffered lots of judgment, and being possibly neurologically atypical.
This has actually swayed completely the wrong way for me. Getting people to like me was unreliable as I was (as stated in the video) never able to tell. But the worst thing for me to have is doubt and uncertainty. So I tend to make people NOT like me on purpose. Because that's extremely easy to accomplish and removes all forms of doubt and uncertainty. Sadly I've been doing that for so many years now that I just do it automatically.
I always think i am a nuisance to other poeple, that i have nothing important to say and that my opinion does not matter. I've grown very insecure in the last months, and that i struggle with "depression" does not really help, either. When i was younger, it wasn't that hard to judge others, but now i seem lost in every conversation. I am in College now, and it seems to just get worse over time.
2:00 “It never ceases to amaze me: we all love ourselves more than other people, but care more about their opinion than our own.” - Marcus Aurelius, 180AD
You sure know your target audience, huh?
As a die hard introvert I can 100% confirm. I've had so many people compliment me after the fact and left a good impression. But I'm terrified of approaching strangers and striking a conversation. You could probably more easily get me to charge into a hail of gunfire than chat up a woman at a bar.
Richard Powell that’s more shy than introverted
I'm an introvert, i have mainly close friends because i get sick of the effort of groups and often with out trying do my own thing, only opening up to those in ear shot. You my friend are shy, if you've seen and want to chat to the women but are afraid too its just a trait of been shy. Having introverted personality is harder cause most people don't understand and distant them self's when you refuse to engage once, it makes the next encounter harder even if you want to try but i guess i also seek and value time alone. I guess it goes hand in hand.
Preach!
That's not introversion, that's social anxiety. These two things are very different.
Bars are for losers
And other hilarious jokes you tell yourself
She was being nice to you.
This is what i came to comment
Underrated
@@LB-vf2hm Lmao same here
I love this comment
Just in time to cure some self loathing people.
Just like me…
Thank you science, I love you too.
This will pass
Know Your Defect
Heh, I’m not depressed or anything, just that I found solace in learning new things, and kept my emotion fluctuations to minimum so I won’t have to deal with the negativities.
Think > Feel, something like this helps a lot.
But thank you tho.
That's a very bold statement
Truth
“Conversations with new people can be sort of terrifying”
Replace _“sort of terrifying”_ with _“extremely traumatizing”_ then that sentence will be relatable
dunno if you're joking, but it's a sheer true for some people...
So long as it isnt small talk, I can handle it...small talk is grueling.
How about "Conversations with new people can lead to PTSD."
Hi @@brokenacoustic, how are you?
@@sebastianelytron8450 who are you people!?
I dunno, if I we're likeable, I'd have friends.
Were
Amen brother
Shine N. Hatfield
Same here.
You're likeable. But making friends takes effort. You're lazy :(
me too...
@@Ealsonspite Oh, believe me, I've spent 24 years trying.
I don't think people really like me. I've been told that usually people that meet me for the first time later describe me as "strange". Now, what that strange means I may never know, but I'm sure it doesn't mean likable.
Norma that's probably because they're not use to meeting talking cats
Strange sounds good to me. :) At least it's not boring.
The worst case scenario is that you have a mental illness. If, (and I do mean "if"), that's the case, you have a journey ahead.
The most important decision you'll make is whether to accept the often substandard help that's readily available, or to be a " snob" and demand better.
Well were both strange u know. So. Idk if u feel better after knowing it but i do
Nah they just can't immediately put you in some existing bucket.
See the part about social norms in the video - you can simply choose to act more predictable in a general way and you'll stop being strange.
Whenever I go to a place where I'll be meeting new people I take my Inuit/Eskimo friend along as a wingman.
He's really good at breaking the ice.
Classic Therion!😂
Cringey jokes
I can't punch you through a screen, but i want to
You've got a set of snow balls on ya.
I bring an ice pick, seems people like it when I hold it up during conversation or point it at them... I mean, they act more eager to please, at least. So... I keep doing it.
I think I'm awesome, but nobody else knows it; except for the imaginary audience watching the Truman Show of my life. They know it.
I was feeling down today, but this video and the comments lifted my spirits. Thank you!
We are just being friendly
2:34-2:43 that is SHOCKINGLY accurate on how I am in every group conversations...also most of the time when I try chiming in on something I get cut off by someone else talking.
You might not be talking as loudly as you think you are. I have that problem. What sounds like normal speaking volume to others, sounds like I'm yelling to me. What sounds like I'm speaking normally to me, sounds like borderline whispering to others lol. In the past I used to think people were constantly cutting me off or ignoring me. The reality was that people just straight up couldn't hear me.
Me too :( sometimes I've actually wondered if I'm a ghost and don't know it like in the sixth sense.
@@RockBandRS I don't know. I've had plenty of times were I start talking and they turn and look right me but someone else starts talking and they immediately focus on that person instead. Which always changes the topic that everyone continues on with. Leaving the comment I wanted to say left behind.
@@milesmallon Thats because people dont think you're important or because they dont care about you as much as the other person. People prioritize others over others. Ive known this since middle school personally and its a hard pill to swallow, those people are usually not your true friends. It can also be because what you're saying doesn't interest them.
@@_hector__ Gee that's a great confidence booster...especially since my family does this to me a lot...
A very useful reminder, especially on a day about love. Remember to love yourselves! You're (in all likelihood) doing very well at life!
I didn't realise how much I needed this video, cheers guys
Well, feeling pretty lonely and isolated right now, this somehow made me fell better.
Same
Thats a title I needed today.
Brit is my favourite host.
Wajih bec: you're not alone. :)
Brit is totally my favorite!!! She exhibits a wonderful intelligence and an obvious excitement about whatever she is talking about...especially when it isn't a scripted session! I like her so much that I listened tu the infomercial part at the end...I usually bail early!
Please do an episode on tricks to create and sustain a conversation
There are no tricks, you should talk about stuff that interest you, if people dont like you for that, you are hanging with wrong people.
Would you be glad that someone is tricking you into thinking they enjoy what you are talking about??
The only trick is to respect and be proud about what YOU like. That is what people are attracted to.
Drilling into their skulls and pouring bleach and acid onto their brains is a good way of losing a friendship.
Find a common interest, that's an easy way to get lost in conversation. Find a relevant question/statement regarding whatever social situation you're in. I find that's an extremely successful way to start a conversation.
Keep asking questions about them
Ask about today's weather. Ask about tomorrow's weather.
Find a pattern
At school everyone wants to sit next to me and I got popular pretty fast even though I'm shy. It's insane. In elementary school nobody liked me because I was strange but now people that I don't even know come up to me and ask me if I wanna sit with them. It makes me really happy.
I got over my social anxiety when I realized people don't hate me. They couldn't care less about me, and it was oddly freeing when I found that out.
I'm not falling for this again!
"You wouldn't worry so much about what others think of you if you realized how seldom they do. "A quote likely misattributed to Eleanor Roosevelt (11 October 1884 - 7 November 1962)
David Foster Wallace (21 February 1962 - 12 September 2008) - "You will become way less concerned with what other people think of you when you realize how seldom they do."
DFW quote is accurate but where's the source for ER's quote?
According to Quote Investigator the originator is probably Olin Miller "You probably, wouldn’t worry about what people think of you if you could know how seldom they do!” as appeared in the widely syndicated newspaper column of Walter Winchell in January 1937.
I usually dislike people before I talk to em. I often like people much more after talking to them, even if it’s awkward.
Thank you.
I'm so glad Brit is back! I love her enthusiasm.
Personally my favorite episode of SciShow Psych to date, and I've been watchign SciShow since 2012! And I loved the part at 2:42 where you said the "on know the moment went bye" I feel that way almost every time too. Would love to see more episodes like this one targeting social economics like this one touches on!
Don't compare your behind-the-scenes to other peoples directors cut. A valuable life lesson for me.
Brit has such a nice energy for this kind of stuff, and Sci Show Psych in general
Am extremely anxious and pretty observant. Usually when SciShow (Psych) lets out the "but being aware of this effect existing can make you less sensitive to it", I roll my eyes because, well, of course I knew it existed. Pretty observent remember? So I was already trying to self-correct a bit for years, etc. etc.
First time this sentence is uttered and I'm actually learning information that could be a bit life-changing. Yes I'm still extremely anxious, thus my negative bias will still be huge. But now I know I have good arguments to temper it even a little bit. And that is priceless. I come here for science and studies. But at this very moment, those channels just became more than a hobby. Thank you.
I needed this after my college interview today.
The liking gap is really really real and relatable. Great video topic!
"You're more likeable then you think"
Thats where your wrong kiddo 👉😎👉
But your name
Was this posted today for all the single pringles put there?
This is comforting, but that comfort is lost on the feeling of being sad that I had to be told people (probably) like me more than I think. But then, I am a pessimist. I usually think nobody really likes me and act as such, since it's safe to do so, and safety is comfortable.
Either way, thanks Sci Show! I needed to hear this on a rough Valentine's Day.
This is why I love science. It makes me appreciate life much more. Thank you for this video.
That was awesome news, indeed
Thank you for sharing and continuing to provide valuable educations for learners. I love your stuff keep it up.
Wow, I would have never guessed that this is a real thing and other people experience it, too! I'm not sure if I'm still a little extreme in that regard since it takes a couple of months and several times of people asking me to join them going somewhere or stuff until I can accept that they actually like me and even willingly want to spend time with me instead of just being nice.
And the point about group conversations was also very accurate. I miss opportunities to add something to the conversation a lot because I thought a second to long about it and they're already at another topic and I'm also being cut off a lot. That's why I feel most comfortable speaking to just one other person or with the right people two or three others is also fine.
I think the thing that makes me doubt myself is the fact that people always gossip about others. I keep thinking "Wow, if they're talking bad about *this* person, I don't even want to know what they say about me".
Hopefully you’ve met some new people, since there are plenty of people who don’t gossip this much, or at all.
Also, gossip doesn’t actually have to be negative! People seem drawn to scandals, but gossip is a way for people to cognitively remind themselves of who’s in their social circle and what they’ve been up to lately… which can AND SHOULD include positive things!
It's been a while since I've watched a SciShow Psych video, but I like this host way more than she thinks I do.
The abbreviation for social anxiety disorder is "SAD" and I think that is the most relatable thing I've heard.
As someone with aspergers, you have no idea how reassuring this is
I’ll enjoy knowing new people I meet probably like me more than I think, as I sit it the dark depths of 2020 unable to meet many new people at all.
This video is actually just on time. A very nice and cool new boy showed up at school, and I'm terrified of embarrassing myself in front of him. Although we talked for a bit and he seems to think I'm pretty okay, so at least I haven't messed up yet.
thanks
Thank you Brit, you're very likeable yourself! :)
I feel like I am likable to my coworkers, I feel confident about myself when I’m out in public. I don’t have social anxiety or other issues. But I still don’t have any friends. It’s weird.
2:15 You know because MATH 😃👍😁
2:34 Wow, this is so relatable!
I liked this video way more than I thought I would
*Thumbnail:* Likable
*Title:* Likeable
Yes I'm that guy at parties. Am I still lik(e)able?
At least you get invited to parties!
Bonus: They meant lickable.
I think they meant EVERYONE but you
You mean "the guy whose observation skills might be on par with freakin' Sherlock"?... Sure!
altrocks I JUST GUFFAWED
Great episode!
There's also the "fool-gap"
That's when you have a distorted vision of someone (usually thinking that the person is amazing and that you would build an amazing family together) after talking to the person only once (:
You're not responsible for whether other people like you or they don't. You're responsible for being authentic. Or, to put it another way, "If you have integrity, nothing else matters. If you don't have integrity, nothing else matters." ~Alan Kooi Simpson
I like meeting new people and usually give people the benefit of the doubt. Respect is given without hesitation, not earned, but can be lost. Chances are pretty high that most people like me more than I like myself, regardless of a first meeting or lifelong friendship. That is not a thing I would use to relate to people (bloody depressing, really). Makes for horrible conversation. Better to wear a smile share a laugh. I think most people are generally good and want peace. Being positive at the outset is far more memorable.
That feeling when you talk to someone you really like, and after the conversation ends you think you were the most awkward person in existence (even though nothing awkward happened and he actually laughed at your lame joke) and then never dare to talk to that person again.. saddest part is the fact he's a coworker so i see him 4 days in the week, fml
Your new haircut is flattering.
its harder for aspies
That's because they are magic.
I think this video is squarely aimed at neurotypicals only.
@@altrocks, really now?
I disagree uness they also have social anxiety, which worsens the condition as a whole. Those lucky enough to not be burdened by both at the same time can easily learn social skills, especially at a young age and then they're essentially fine socially.
@@mycelia_ow if you go back to the video, she clearly specifies that the like-gap is a common thing among most of us, not just people with light/severe social disorders.
I agree with this video even though I am my own worst nightmare.
The people I meet automatically like me more than I like myself!
I already know I'm extremely likeable!!!
I despise myself and others so when good or fantastical situations pop up I tend to be surprised and even panicked by them. Like if a person I found attractive engages a conversation with scares me greatly. I would try and flee the situation like a fight gone bad.
Great presenter. She should do more videos!
I was literally thinking of how unbearable of a human being I am, then I scroll upon this video, thanks SciShow 👍🏾
"because... math." lol!
but how do you know you underestimated it? maybe the other Person just said she liked you in that study to seem nicer? Or she didn't really know you so she just avoided a false negative, to not be unfair in his or her accounts.
this is what I thought too
Impossible to know.
The human variable will always be there unless we somehow figure out precisely what makes us tick to a tee.
On the other hand, people do that socially anyway so it's accurate in a different way.
ha.... after my life experiences, doesn't seem it :) if I was more likeable than I think, I wouldn't be the state I am.
I always give positive feedback if I have it. Things like saying "you're really cool" or "you're pretty cute/good looking" or "I hope we'll end up as friends" etc, because I think that's something most people will either enjoy hearing or don't mind hearing. It has creeped people out before, but its just my genuine feelings, so I think I should express them.
I cant even bring myself up to watch this
2:12 laugh-crying right now
The real question is why do creepy people instantly like me while the people that i really want them to don't ? hmmmm
I'm so glad that I totally don't care if someone likes me or not. I have no such problems :)
"This isn't the Sims". 😂👏🏽
My brother likes to tell me I'm not as unsocial as I think I am. But this whole video reminds me of a time where me and my brother were at this thing for a week, and (according to him anyway) people came up to him and were like "Are you [generic angst's] brother? They're pretty cool!"
I mean I'd rather that people tell me that I'm cool rather than tell other people that I'm cool, cause y'know, self esteem.
3:42 "This isn't The Sims" LMAO
I'm well aware of that.
So are you. :)
3:42 This line threw me off...I was playing The Sims while watching this!
I don't think most people should be discouraged about not making friends. Most people enjoy talking to me but it's circumstantial. Most of the time people are in their own worlds and don't care enough to try to be more than a coworker or basic friend. Which is fine because true friendship requires effort from both parties.
Cheers to the good timing on valentines day haha
The word likeable always makes me think of the movie “Frank”
I love your haircut. ❤
Tell that to my student evaluations... many of them seem to think I'm the devil incarnate.
I doubt it considering how much I'm disappointed in people and therefore indifferent towards them
That's pretty cool!
I have tested this. I have a pretty good approximation of whether and how much people like me. And people tend not to care if I like them or not.
I may be likable, but I surely don't like many others. I get irrationally angry at people if I have to spend too much time around them.
That is the reason why I am a trucker, I get to be alone most of the day and night and listen to my audiobooks.
Now i just think people will think i'm been 'cocky' because i think they like me because i know about the liking gap but in reality me knowing about the liking gap makes me less likable because i'm not judging my self to correct unlikable behavior i think.
Of course they do, I'm such a lovely & humble person, lol.
I don't know. Have you met me?
Yes 👀
Oh hi Susan.
I'm Poppy.
Your profile picture looks like a human slingshot.
I have noticed I am particularly difficult for people who are insecure, at least for a while as we are developing a social relationship, since I don’t conform to all the social norms they have come to expect (however conscious or unconscious). I don’t give a lot of feedback because I’m reserved... due to having suffered lots of judgment, and being possibly neurologically atypical.
I hope this video can change my view of my self
This has actually swayed completely the wrong way for me. Getting people to like me was unreliable as I was (as stated in the video) never able to tell. But the worst thing for me to have is doubt and uncertainty. So I tend to make people NOT like me on purpose. Because that's extremely easy to accomplish and removes all forms of doubt and uncertainty. Sadly I've been doing that for so many years now that I just do it automatically.
I always think i am a nuisance to other poeple, that i have nothing important to say and that my opinion does not matter. I've grown very insecure in the last months, and that i struggle with "depression" does not really help, either. When i was younger, it wasn't that hard to judge others, but now i seem lost in every conversation. I am in College now, and it seems to just get worse over time.
Bold of you to assume I think I’m likable at all
Are you saying you "like" like me? Cuz I "like" like you a lot lot! ;D
My first thought after reading the title was "No, I don't think so"
i love your hair!